No Ego: Recent Episodes
Cy Wakeman
No Ego, hosted by thought leader Cy Wakeman, will give you the tools you need as a leader to to ditch the drama, end entitlement, and drive big results in your workplace and your worldplace. It is high time to reinvent leadership thinking. Stop worrying about your employees’ happiness, and start worrying about their accountability.
When smart teams can wrestle with ideas and build on each other's input to get to the best ultimate solution, it is where companies thrive. When it is done well it is truly a thing of beauty, and this type of ability is what unlocks the most innovative companies in the world. When this turns unhealthy or people begin to debate in a drama-filled way, it can lead to some of the biggest detrimental effects to company culture. In this episode, Alex shares exactly what healthy debate looks, feels, and sounds like from a Reality-Based low drama perspective, and gives you a few practical tools and techniques you can bring in if some of your discussions tend to get heated and cross a line.
Here is the link to the Negative Brainstorming tool that Alex mentioned: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AV6n69QCVnY&list=PLZWrCbJ7Bukuwek8D2y-6QAyGFAiuiB9a&index=2
Here is a link to learn how to share input in the form of expertise (and not opinions), which Alex mentioned in the video. This is a skilled and respectful way to debate ideas and move forward productively when adding your perspective: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wLBUIVTzVIE&list=PLZWrCbJ7Bukuwek8D2y-6QAyGFAiuiB9a&index=4
Episode Highlights
00:03:09 Are you debating the what or the how?
00:05:01 Are you playing the wrong role in the conversation?
00:08:01 Is your team still fighting a decision that's already been made?
00:08:59 What is the negative brainstorming tool, and why does it work?
00:12:53 How do you turn post-decision frustration into forward motion?
00:15:04 What happened when one company ran a "break it" session before a major rollout?
00:19:18 Can shared language defuse tension before a hard conversation even starts?
00:23:01 Are you disagreeing with the idea, or attacking the person?
00:25:03 Why won't facts change someone's mind if facts didn't get them there?
00:27:39 What's your biggest tell that debate has turned unhealthy?
What happens when your team stops trying - not because they can't, but because they've decided it won't matter anyway? Alex Dorr, CEO and host of the Reality-Based Leadership Podcast, unpacks the psychological phenomenon behind stalled accountability: learned helplessness. It's the belief that your actions no longer shape your outcomes. It's contagious. And it's often hiding in plain sight, disguised as "that's just how things are here."
Alex walks through two classic experiments to show how deeply this pattern gets wired in, then turns the mirror on himself with a personal story about a phantom leg cramp that limited him for six years. From there, he offers three practical techniques leaders can use immediately: naming excuses and asking "what else could we try," swapping victim-questions for ownership-questions, and reframing impossible goals into small, doable next steps.
Learned helplessness isn't a character flaw. It's a habit. And habits can be broken. Listen in, then go work on it with your team this week.
Episode Highlights
00:02:27 What learned helplessness actually is
00:04:02 The flea experiment
00:06:38 The five monkeys experiment
00:08:27 Phrases that signal learned helplessness
00:10:03 Alex's personal story: the lunges that haunted him
00:14:04 Technique 1: name the excuse, ask what else
00:15:08 Technique 2: swap why and who for what and how
00:17:41 Technique 3: thinking inside-the-box
We are officially 2.5 months out from the launch of my new leadership book How We Could. This book will transform how leaders handle drama in the workplace and ensure that all of your teams can move anyone from why they can't to how they could regardless of circumstances.
This simple 5-step framework helps leaders to perfectly balance being their for their teams with empathy and authenticity while still calling them up to deliver on the important results your organization has been asked to deliver. In this episode, I share exactly who the book is for, what the 5-step framework is all about, why this book takes all 30 years of Reality-Based Leadership's research to a new level and how it fills in the gaps that our organization and content hadn't filled until now.
Buckle up and get your pre-order fingers ready - this book will transform your team to have the best year they've ever had in 2026 and beyond!
Link to pre-order How We Could: The Framework to Lead Without Drama, Build Alignment and Call Teams to Greatness for you and your teams: https://www.realitybasedleadership.com/pre-order To order 10+ copies for your team please reach out to info@realitybasedleadership.com Link to join our newsletter for free exclusive videos, leadership tips, content and events: https://www.realitybasedleadership.com/#newsletter Episode Highlights:
00:01:36 – Why this book, "How We Could," matters now
00:03:06 – Pre-order bonuses and bulk orders for teams
00:06:38 – The backstory: where the framework came from
00:11:27 – The Call to Greatness framework is born
00:14:01 – Why empathy without accountability becomes sympathy
00:17:26 – The five steps explained (love up, clean thinking, find your part, know your role, take action)
00:25:28 – When and where to use the framework
00:29:25 – The SBAR tool and why tools alone aren't enough
00:35:37 – Touch-and-go moments vs. calls to greatness that take years
00:44:01 – Closing thoughts and pre-order details
Are you or your team stuck in frustration when things go wrong — blaming circumstances, venting, or spiraling instead of moving forward?
In this episode of the Reality-Based Leadership Podcast, Alex Dorr shares the single most powerful coaching question every leader should have in their back pocket: What would great look like? It sounds simple. But used at the right moment, it can shift someone from full-blown drama mode to clear, accountable action in seconds.
Alex takes you behind the scenes of a real event-day crisis — a billing error, a leader on the verge of a meltdown, and a colleague who chose to coach instead of fix, and breaks down exactly why this question works, when to use it, and how to make it land.
If you're a leader, manager, or team member who wants to stop spinning in frustration and start adding value in messy moments, this episode gives you exactly what you need. Because the goal isn't a perfect reality. It's knowing what great looks like, and choosing to go be it.
Episode Highlights:
00:01:12 - The one coaching question every leader needs
00:01:27 - The three ways to ask it
00:02:04 - The certification event story begins
00:03:20 - The billing error crisis
00:04:15 - Spiraling into low self
00:05:31 - The colleague who coached instead of fixed
00:06:25 - Why relationship matters before using this question
00:06:44 - The question lands — and shifts everything
00:08:17 - "Sounds like you already know what great looks like"
00:09:15 - Why typical "got a minute?" meetings cost you more
00:10:13 - Accountability after the moment passes
00:11:40 - Why this is the most powerful coaching question
00:12:09 - Low self vs. high self explained
00:14:08 - How the question moves us from ego to self-reflection
00:15:49 - Using it on yourself when you want to disengage
00:16:16 - Why fixers and over-functioners need this question most
00:18:49 - We all already know what great looks like
00:19:33 - Your assignment and takeaways
Are you or your team stuck in frustration over things you can't control? Do small disruptions turn into outsized stress, blame, or wasted energy?
In this episode of the Reality-Based Leadership Podcast, Alex Dorr tackles one of the most common and costly workplace habits: arguing with reality.
When you argue with reality, you lose 100% of the time. And yet, it's where leaders and teams spend hours every day. We resist delays, complain about changes, question decisions we weren't part of, and wish things were different… instead of focusing on what we can actually impact.
Alex breaks down how this shows up in real time - from everyday workplace frustrations to a behind-the-scenes story of a scheduling breakdown that could have spiraled into blame, stress, and lost trust. Instead, it became a case study in shifting quickly from reaction to leadership.
The shift starts with one simple question: given this, what would great look like?
From there, we explore two practical frameworks you can use immediately: The Three Lanes: how to stay focused on your business instead of getting pulled into others' responsibilities or fighting reality itself. The Space for Impact: how to move from an unpreferred reality to an ideal outcome by focusing only on where you can add value.
If you're a leader, manager, or team member navigating constant change, unexpected problems, or daily frustration, this episode will help you stop the spiral and start leading forward.
Because the goal isn't to avoid hard realities; it's to respond to them in a way that actually moves things forward.
Episode Highlights:
00:01:20 - Why leaders are struggling more than ever
00:02:30 - Back to basics: Reality-Based Leadership
00:03:15 - What arguing with reality looks like at work
00:05:30 - The truth: you lose 100% of the time
00:06:15 - The Three Lanes framework
00:08:30 - Stop judging, start helping
00:09:00 - Real story: scheduling breakdown
00:12:00 - The Space for Impact model
00:14:00 - "Given this, what would great look like?"
00:17:30 - Avoiding the post-event drama spiral
In this episode of the Reality Based Leadership Podcast, Alex Dorr shares the surprisingly simple technique that helped a stuck team finally break through: giving the benefit of the doubt.
Here's what was happening. This team felt like everyone was against them. Every step hit a barrier. The departments there to support them felt like roadblocks. The "no people." It's a pattern Alex sees constantly, and it almost always points to the same root cause: stories.
Not the facts. The stories we layer on top of the facts. The victim story. The villain story. The helpless story. And because of our biology, that ancient fight-or-flight wiring still running in the background, we jump straight into the worst-case version of events every single time.
The fix? You don't have to change the situation. You don't have to change the other person. You just have to change the story.
Alex walks through the exact mechanics of how our thinking creates our feelings, drives our actions, and ultimately shapes our results. And how a single pivot toward assuming noble intent can completely change the outcome of an interaction, a relationship, or a team's entire culture.
Episode Highlights:
00:01:20 - What this podcast is built to do and why this episode goes back to basics
00:02:24 - The client story: a team where everything felt like a roadblock
00:03:04 - Introducing the technique: giving the benefit of the doubt
00:05:26 - The three stories: victim, villain, and helpless
00:07:04 - The biology behind negative thinking and the saber-tooth tiger effect
00:09:16 - Co-creation: how your story changes the interaction
00:10:23 - The walk-by-without-a-hello example, both sides
00:12:48 - The shadow side and edge cases
00:13:06 - The "edit your story" technique in practice
00:16:27 - The event cycle visual: thinking, feeling, action, results
00:19:07 - Your reflection and call to action
Is your best employee secretly your biggest drain? Are your top performers spending more time policing their teammates than actually helping them?
In this episode of the Reality Based Leadership Podcast, Alex Dorr introduces one of the most powerful overlooked shifts a leader can make: lead first, manage second.
Here's the hard truth: most of us are managing first and hoping there's time left over to lead. We investigate problems, firefight circumstances, and chase accountability — while the real opportunity, the person standing right in front of us, goes uncoached.
Alex shares a story that perfectly captures this trap. A top performer discovers a colleague is fudging their time sheet — and instead of saying something, they launch a full workplace stakeout. Surveillance. Witnesses. A formal report. The cost of the "crime" they uncovered? About $150. The cost of catching it? Over $1,500 — plus a culture quietly drifting toward judgment instead of helping.
The fix isn't complicated. It starts with one question: what did you do to help?
We cover two immediately applicable ideas: Lead First — how to coach the person in front of you before you ever touch the circumstance, using simple questions that build accountability without drama. Manage Second — how to lock in 7 to 10 non-negotiables around process so your management runs efficiently and you actually have time to lead.
If you're a team leader, people manager, or culture builder who feels buried in firefighting and wants to finally get ahead of it — this episode gives you the mindset shift and the practical tools to do it.
Episode Highlights:
00:01:10 – Leadership vs. management: What's the real difference?
00:02:04 – The story begins: A top performer brings a problem to Alex
00:02:42 – The workplace stakeout unfolds
00:04:51 – Whose crime is bigger? Doing the math on drama
00:06:09 – The better question: "What did you do to help?"
00:06:31 – What a truly supportive team culture looks like
00:07:09 – Breaking down the two roles: leadership and management defined
00:09:13 – The non-negotiables framework: how to manage efficiently
00:12:25 – Closing thoughts: Find your firefighting moments and lead instead
Are your leaders apologizing for the very changes your business needs to survive? Are your teams using the word "change" like it's a four-letter word?
In this episode of the Reality Based Leadership Podcast, we tackle one of the most common traps leadership teams fall into: mistaking sympathy for empathy and hedging on change announcements in ways that quietly signal to your team that you don't believe they can handle what's next.
Change isn't hard. It's only hard for the unready. And the leaders who master that distinction stop coddling their teams and start calling them up to greatness, without the drama.
We break down four myths about change that are keeping your teams stuck. "Change is hard" and why leading with that belief exposes your low expectations. "We need to grieve this change" and why hospice frameworks don't belong in your all-hands meeting. "There's too much change" and the simple word swap that instantly shifts your team's energy. "We're change fatigued" and why bite-sized continuous development is the real antidote.
If you're a senior leader, HR executive, or culture change champion responsible for building teams that execute through uncertainty, this episode gives you a new lens and a new language to lead change without resistance.
Episode Highlights:
00:00:50 – Why navigating change is a core leadership skill (and 13% of workplace drama)
00:02:05 – The mistake leaders make: apologizing for what the business needs
00:03:13 – Key principle: Change isn't hard — it's only hard for the unready
00:04:20 – Empathy vs. sympathy when communicating change to your team
00:05:09 – How to rehearse and deliver change announcements cleanly
00:06:40 – The 4 myths of change: Myth #1 — Change is hard
00:06:57 – Myths #2 & #3 — Grieving change and "there's too much change"
00:08:43 – The "replace change with next" exercise for teams
00:09:40 – Myth #4 — Change fatigue and why bite-sized development is the antidote
00:12:13 – Closing thoughts: Staying ready or falling behind
In this episode, Alex Dorr tackles one of the most overlooked culture killers in leadership today: allowing opinions to replace expertise in team conversations…In this episode, Alex Dorr tackles one of the most overlooked culture killers in leadership today: allowing opinions to replace expertise in team conversations without even realizing the damage it's doing.
Alex breaks down why the most experienced, most passionate people on your team are often the ones derailing your meetings. Not because they don't care, but because they're bringing gut feelings instead of frameworks, resistance instead of recommendations, and backstory instead of solutions. He draws a clear line between opinions focused on why it won't work and expertise focused on how it could work given the concerns.
He then gives listeners two simple but powerful tools to shift the dynamic. The "We Could If" reframe interrupts the "we can't because" spiral and redirects the same energy into forward momentum. The SBAR framework (Situation, Background, Analysis, Recommendation) turns venting into value by structuring conversations around data, best practice, and actionable next steps.
The result is a team where the loudest voice is no longer the most resistant one, but the most informed one. Where preference stops trumping potential. And where leaders stop managing drama and start pulling greatness out of the people already in the room.
Alex closes with a challenge that lands hard: if you have a lot of passion and a lot of input but nobody seems to be listening, that's not a communication problem. That's an expertise problem. And this episode gives you the tools to fix it.
Episode Highlights:
00:00:38 – Core principle: expertise over opinions
00:01:53 – Opinions = why it won't work; Expertise = how it could work
00:02:22 – The experienced-but-resistant team member problem
00:03:18 – Opinions vs. expertise defined
00:04:07 – People with the most opinions often have the least expertise
00:04:33 – Tool #1: "We Could If" reframe
00:05:31 – How the reframe unlocks contribution
00:06:23 – Tool #2: SBAR framework
00:06:43 – S = Situation
00:07:07 – B = Background
00:07:41 – A = Analysis (the expertise section)
00:09:40 – R = Recommendations
00:10:34 – Leader's responsibility to model expertise
In this episode, Alex Dorr simplifies one of the most misunderstood concepts in leadership: personal accountability. Far from being a buzzword or a blame tool, Alex reframes accountability as a mindset that directly drives happiness, engagement, and results.
He breaks down why accountability has been watered down in leadership conversations—and why that's a problem. Drawing on research and real-world leadership patterns, Alex introduces a powerful framework built on four key elements: commitment, resilience, ownership, and continuous learning. Together, these form the foundation of high-performing, highly engaged teams. The episode ultimately challenges leaders to stop avoiding accountability conversations and instead coach it intentionally, using simple but powerful questions that shift teams out of excuses and into ownership and action.
Episode Highlights: 00:00:00 — Why accountability has become overcomplicated—and why it's not a dirty word.
00:01:30 — The problem: accountability as a buzzword that leaders ignore or misunderstand.
00:03:00 — The truth: accountability is a mindset, not a skill set.
00:05:30 — Internal vs. external locus of control and how it shapes performance.
00:07:30 — The 50-10-40 model: where happiness and results actually come from.
00:10:30 — Why accountability drives both engagement and performance.
00:13:00 — The four factors of accountability: commitment, resilience, ownership, and learning.
00:17:30 — The danger of "conditional buy-in" and how it leads to excuses.
00:21:00 — Coaching accountability: asking "Are you all in?" and getting real commitment.
00:24:30 — Practical questions leaders can use to build accountability on their teams.
In this episode, Alex Dorr tackles a foundational mindset shift that can radically change how leaders experience work: suffering is optional—and often self-imposed. Through relatable stories and practical frameworks, Alex unpacks how most workplace stress doesn't come from reality itself, but from the stories we attach to it.
He introduces three common patterns—pre-suffering, post-suffering, and group suffering—that quietly drain energy and derail teams. From "Sunday scaries" to reliving past frustrations, these habits keep leaders stuck in cycles of unnecessary stress. Alex challenges listeners to separate facts from the narrative their minds create, using simple tools like asking, "What do I know for sure?" to interrupt reactive thinking. The result? Clearer decisions, better energy management, and more engaged teams.
Episode Highlights: 00:00:00 — The core idea: you can choose to experience work with joy or misery.
00:01:30 — Why suffering at work is often self-imposed, not caused by reality.
00:03:00 — Pre-suffering: stressing about future events before they even happen.
00:04:30 — Post-suffering: reliving past problems that are already resolved.
00:05:45 — Group suffering: how teams normalize negativity and shared frustration.
00:07:00 — The real source of stress: the story you tell yourself—not the situation itself.
00:08:30 — The "tape vs. rat" story: how quickly we escalate harmless situations into crises.
00:10:30 — A practical tool: separating facts from assumptions to reduce emotional reactivity.
00:12:00 — How teams turn simple changes into worst-case scenarios.
00:14:00 — Why energy management—not circumstances—is the real competitive advantage.
In this episode, Alex Dorr zeroes in on one of the most powerful and transformative principles in leadership: "stop judging, start helping." If there were only one mindset shift to improve culture, collaboration, and results, this would be it.
Drawing from real-world leadership moments, Alex explains how quickly teams fall into judgment—blaming others, telling negative stories, and disengaging from solutions. But the moment leaders interrupt that pattern and redirect toward helpful action, everything changes. From workplace dynamics to personal relationships to innovation, this simple principle unlocks clarity, accountability, and forward momentum. Ultimately, this episode challenges leaders to make "stop judging, start helping" a daily, non-negotiable habit that reshapes how teams think, communicate, and perform.
Episode Highlights: 00:00:00 — The one principle that can transform your team: stop judging, start helping.
00:01:00 — Why leaders default to thinking "someone else needs this" instead of applying it themselves.
00:03:00 — The core truth: the moment you start judging is the moment you stop leading.
00:05:00 — Brain science: why you can't judge and help at the same time.
00:07:30 — How judgment spreads through teams and shapes culture ("where the leader goes, so goes the team").
00:10:00 — Coaching in real time: shifting a high performer from judgment to helpful action.
00:12:30 — Breaking silos and conflict by replacing blame with collaboration.
00:15:30 — How removing judgment unlocks creativity and innovation in teams.
00:18:30 — Setting boundaries in life: using "start helping" to redirect negative conversations.
00:20:30 — The practical takeaway: make "stop judging, start helping" a team-wide habit.
In this episode, Alex Dorr explores a forward-thinking leadership topic: how to use AI to enhance decision-making, reduce workplace drama, and unlock better solutions. Drawing from a recent live event, Alex walks through how modern leaders can combine Reality Based Leadership tools with AI to break through stuck thinking and accelerate progress.
Rather than replacing human insight, AI becomes a powerful thought partner—helping teams generate ideas when energy is low, accountability is avoided, or creativity stalls. Alex highlights how tools like "thinking inside the box" and SBAR can be supercharged with AI to move teams from "why we can't" into "how we could." The episode ultimately reframes AI as a leadership advantage: not just for efficiency, but for expanding thinking, increasing accountability, and driving next right action.
Episode Highlights: 00:00:00 — Introducing the idea: using AI to enhance leadership and ditch workplace drama.
00:01:30 — Why modern leaders are shifting from managing work to managing energy and thinking.
00:03:30 — The opportunity: combining AI with Reality Based Leadership tools.
00:06:00 — How the "thinking inside the box" framework helps teams move from excuses to solutions.
00:08:30 — When teams get stuck: the role of ego, avoidance, and lack of willingness.
00:10:30 — Using AI as a creative partner to generate breakthrough ideas within constraints.
00:12:30 — The key insight: AI never runs out of ideas—even when teams do.
00:13:45 — Identifying the real blockers: skill gaps, outdated approaches, or lack of willingness.
00:14:45 — Enhancing the SBAR framework with AI to improve analysis and recommendations.
00:15:45 — Why AI should support (not replace) human thinking and collaboration.
In this episode, Alex Dorr explores a nuanced leadership question: why can high performers be difficult to lead? Drawing from conversations sparked by viral social content and years of Reality Based Leadership work, Alex distinguishes between high performance and high accountability—two traits that often overlap, but are not always the same.
He explains how strong performers can become challenging when they slip into righteousness, start judging others, or resist the responsibility to help elevate the team around them. Alex also unpacks how shifting workplace realities, evolving standards, and rapid change can expose whether someone is truly adaptable—or simply relying on past success. The episode ultimately challenges leaders to create cultures that support excellence without enabling drama, and to ensure their highest performers remain grounded in accountability, not just output.
Episode Highlights with Timestamps: 00:00:00 — Introducing the question: why are high performers often difficult to lead?
00:02:24 — The important distinction between high performance and high accountability.
00:04:21 — Why the same workplace cannot satisfy both high-accountability and low-accountability mindsets.
00:05:45 — How some high performers become difficult when they step out of accountability.
00:07:10 — The danger of "judging the judges" and when top performers start creating drama.
00:10:00 — Why performance is increasingly becoming pass/fail in a changing, AI-shaped workplace.
00:12:15 — How yesterday's top performer can become average if they are not ready for what's next.
00:13:10 — High-accountability people get nervous when change is not happening.
00:14:30 — Why great performers want leaders to hold the standard, not lower it.
00:15:45 — Helping high performers lead with mentorship instead of judgment.
Follow Alex on social media: @alexmdorr
In this episode, Alex Dorr tackles a challenge that impacts nearly every workplace: disengagement. Prompted by sobering data that nearly 70% of employees feel disengaged at work, Alex unpacks why this happens—and more importantly, how to break the cycle. He reframes engagement as a personal choice, not just an organizational outcome, and challenges listeners to stop waiting for perfect conditions before leaning in.
Through practical frameworks and real-world examples, Alex explains how stress, change, and "unpreferred reality" tempt people to mentally check out. Instead of falling into complaint or avoidance, he introduces a more empowering path: finding the "space for impact"—the narrow but powerful place between current reality and what great could look like. The episode is packed with actionable tools to help individuals and teams re-engage, take ownership, and rediscover purpose in their work. Ultimately, this conversation is both a wake-up call and a roadmap: engagement isn't about circumstances—it's about how you choose to show up within them.
Episode Highlights with Timestamps: 00:00:00 — Why this episode matters: addressing widespread disengagement at work.
00:02:00 — The reality of disengagement: Gallup data and the cost of employees mentally checking out.
00:05:30 — Engagement is a choice—even in difficult or imperfect environments.
00:08:45 — Where disengagement begins: stress, change, and "unpreferred reality."
00:10:30 — The trap of arguing with reality vs. taking responsibility for impact.
00:12:00 — Finding the "space for impact" between current reality and what great looks like.
00:14:30 — The "given that" framework: shifting from excuses to action.
00:18:30 — Editing your story: separating facts from assumptions to unlock clarity.
00:22:00 — Practical tools for teams: inside-the-box thinking and crowd-sourcing solutions.
00:25:00 — Shared accountability: what leaders and teams must both own to create engagement.
In this episode, Alex Dorr explores a powerful and often overlooked leadership question: does drama have an even bigger impact than we think? Building on Reality-Based Leadership's well-known 3X drama multiplier, Alex breaks down how drama doesn't just affect individual performance—it compounds across teams, cultures, and especially leadership levels.
He introduces a simple but revealing equation for understanding the total value someone brings to a team: current performance + future potential – drama quotient. Through real-world examples, Alex highlights the danger of the "toxic high performer" and why technical skill alone isn't enough to define value. The conversation takes a deeper turn as he challenges leaders to consider how their own behavior—especially at higher levels—can amplify drama far beyond a 3X effect. Ultimately, this episode is a call to greater awareness: how leaders show up, respond, and communicate has a ripple effect that shapes the entire organization.
For more information on the SBAR tool, check out Alex's YouTube video:https://youtu.be/wLBUIVTzVIE
Episode Highlights with Timestamps 00:00:00 — Introducing the question: does drama have a bigger impact than the 3X multiplier suggests?
00:01:45 — The reality of workplace drama increasing to 2.5 hours per day per employee.
00:03:10 — The disconnect between high performance ratings and actual team results.
00:06:40 — The "toxic high performer" problem: high skill, high drama, low overall value.
00:07:50 — Breaking down the value equation: performance + potential – drama quotient.
00:10:30 — Why drama carries a 3X negative multiplier in team environments.
00:14:50 — Comparing two high performers: skill alone vs. attitude and adaptability.
00:18:30 — Why a "zero" (balanced performance and low drama) is the ideal sustainable target.
00:20:40 — How leadership amplifies drama—why higher roles may carry an even greater multiplier.
00:22:50 — Simple leadership responses ("Wow, good to know") that create space and reduce reactive drama.
In this episode, Alex Dorr unpacks a counterintuitive idea for leaders: the best leadership approach is often the most boring—predictable, steady, and rooted in simple frameworks. Drawing from a recent insight after a speaking engagement, Alex challenges the tendency to overcomplicate leadership with clever tactics instead of relying on consistent, proven approaches.
He explains how great leaders anchor themselves in repeatable frameworks rather than reacting on instinct, allowing them to stay grounded when teams bring problems, stress, or drama. Through practical tools like "stop judging, start helping," The Call to Greatness framework, and the "given that" mindset, Alex shows how leaders can guide conversations toward accountability and next right action. The episode ultimately reframes leadership as less about being impressive and more about being dependable—creating the structure teams need to thrive, grow, and solve problems on their own.
Episode Highlights with Timestamps 00:00:00 — Why the most effective leadership approach is simple, steady, and "boring."
00:01:10 — The problem with overcomplicating leadership instead of recognizing repeatable patterns.
00:02:10 — Great leaders rely on consistent frameworks—not gut reactions—to handle challenges.
00:03:20 — Meeting stressed team members with neutrality and creating a safe place to land.
00:04:35 — "Stop judging, start helping" as a foundational leadership mantra.
00:06:00 — Shifting conversations from blame to "what's the most helpful next step?"
00:08:30 — The Call to Greatness framework: love people up, then call them up to accountability.
00:12:00 — Using accountability questions like "What's your part in this?" to drive growth.
00:15:30 — The "given that" mindset: accepting reality and focusing on what great looks like next.
00:18:45 — Why predictable leadership builds trust and empowers teams to solve problems independently.
In this episode, Alex introduces a refreshed format for the Reality-Based Leadership podcast and explores a leadership challenge he frequently hears from audiences: the difference between loud drama and silent drama in the workplace. Alex explains how drama—defined as thought patterns or behaviors that pull people away from results and happiness—can quietly consume hours of productivity each day.
He breaks down the visible forms of drama like venting, gossiping, and judgment, while also uncovering the more subtle patterns that derail teams beneath the surface—such as choosing preference over potential or misunderstanding decision-making roles. Alex also shares practical tools leaders can use to interrupt drama, including editing the stories we tell ourselves and using structured frameworks to turn complaints into solutions. The episode challenges leaders to recognize where drama may be hiding in their teams and how intentional leadership can redirect that energy toward accountability and results.
Episode Highlights with Timestamps 00:00:00 — Introducing the podcast's new format and the mission to help leaders ditch workplace drama.
00:01:41 — Defining drama as behaviors or thinking that pull teams away from results and engagement.
00:03:34 — Recognizing loud drama: gossip, venting, scorekeeping, and ego-driven reactions.
00:05:16 — Why the common "Do you have a minute?" conversation often leads to workplace drama.
00:07:07 — The difference between sharing feelings and venting that fuels negative stories.
00:09:20 — Using the "Edit Your Story" approach to separate facts from assumptions.
00:12:16 — Turning problems into solutions using the SBAR framework.
00:14:32 — What silent drama looks like when resistance hides beneath the surface.
00:15:41 — Choosing preference over potential and how it quietly undermines teams.
00:17:01 — Understanding the roles of decision maker, consultant, and informed contributor.
In this intimate conversation, Cy and Charlie Pleasant, LCSW dive into the messy beauty of being human in today’s challenging environments — exploring how we navigate fear, uncertainty, and the complexity of our inner worlds. From the transformative power of anger to the importance of boundaries and truth in relationships, they unpack how Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy can be integrated into everyday life. At the heart of it all? A deep call to self-care, love, and community.
Every pinpoint is a portal for your own evolution. If you are wondering what the invitation of your current discomfort and stress might be: it is to go inside and emerge evolved by your current situation. Whether you're familiar with IFS or just curious about emotional healing, this episode offers rich insights for anyone seeking grounded, reality-based leadership — both within and without.
To benefit from Charlie and her work, check her out on IG @charliethattherapist and charliepleasantlcsw.com
Be sure to share this episode with all of your team members and discuss your biggest insight or takeaway.
In this week's episode, Cy and Alex were able to take a fan question that was submitted through the website. The question focused on what to do about negativity at work, and in particular this was part of a group that was going through a residency program.
And so in this episode, Cy and Alex take a look at the question and go into some of their favorite techniques to reflect on the situation that has become negative.
What are some ways that you could reset the negativity and maybe come out at a different angle? What are some tried and true techniques to be able to influence the negativity and hopefully turn it into a better spirit and a better environment of how we could make things better?
Lots of good information and techniques in this episode, so if you've ever been on a team or situation where negativity becomes the norm or people get into patterns of negativity, and you're not sure how to stop it or shift that energy, you'll really love this discussion and find some good takeaways from there.
Be sure to share this episode with all of your team members and discuss your biggest insight or takeaways.
This week's episode is all about a common pattern that happens when people are really excited about Reality-Based Leadership, or they just learned some of our new techniques after a session.
They accidentally begin weaponizing Reality-Based Leadership, and the ideas. We get it, you're excited about some new approaches and really looking forward to trying to shift a place your team has been stuck, or an individual has been stuck for a long time. What often happens, is people grab the harshest part of the message and use it on the person that's running away from them the fastest, and then the content doesn't work.
This is one example of many that are talked about in this week's podcast of where the loving part of Reality-Based Leadership gets weaponized and used for evil. So today's episode, Cy and Alex discuss some of the ways that great techniques that can work most of the time, get used in a way that's harsh and actually backfires for people that are excited about Reality-Based Leadership.
This can affect even the most seasoned practitioners of our content and tools, so this is a great reminder. In fact every two years just like what sparked this episode, there's usually an example that comes through that someone grabbed a deeper part of the philosophy and used that first in their very next meeting after a session, and we hear reports that it backfired, then the groups a little bit turned off from RBL.
This podcast is designed to help those who may have experienced setbacks, offering a chance to reset, as well as those eager to maintain the momentum they've built with their teams. It's all about preventing the misuse of the tools, practices, and techniques of Reality-Based Leadership, while ensuring we focus on loving people up so we can call people up to greatness.
In this episode, Cy and Alex share some incredible insights from Reality-Based Leadership's Leadership Development Series! While many know them for their engaging keynotes, their deep dive programs are all about transforming teams into modern leaders who can ditch the drama and turn excuses into tangible results.
They reveal some impressive data from participants, showcasing significant boosts in career satisfaction and leadership skills. For instance, 50% of respondents reported higher job satisfaction, 94% said they’d stay in their roles post-course, and burnout was reduced by an astounding 50%!
On the leadership side, 55% feel more confident coaching others on the spot, while 70% have enhanced their ability to hold teams accountable. Plus, 60% are ready to lead their teams through change with newfound confidence. Remarkably, 80% are excited to drive results without just hoping for the best. And every single participant is now using at least one powerful tool daily to elevate their leadership.
Cy and Alex also explain how the program is structured, from interactive sessions to group coaching and ongoing support that truly makes a difference. If your current training isn't delivering the results you’re looking for, this conversation is a must-listen. And if you’re interested in redesigning your curriculum, Ana from our team can work with you to create a tailored approach for your team. Don’t miss out! Email us today at info@cywakeman.com
A leader recently asked Alex and Cy, “What happens when you're trying Reality-Based Leadership or using a tool and everything goes silent? Does that mean that the tools not working? What do I do when there's silence? What do I do when that silence feels like it has some extra tension attached to it, is it working?”
All of these questions came up and in this podcast, Cy and Alex explore their own experiences in coaching with running their own business facilitating tools that have led to silence. And what that really means from a Reality-Based Leadership perspective.
Many people believe that something is not working when there's silence after introducing a tool technique, coaching question, but we would say that actually means you are just beginning Reality-Based Leadership and getting to the good stuff, cultivating accountability. Self reflection is the foundation of accountability, and self reflection often includes silence.
So in this episode, we're going to share with you ways to use silence to better your leadership and prove your use of the tools and most importantly, moving people from why we can't to how we could. And moving people from where they're stuck into where they're hoping to be.
You'll love this episode. We had fun doing it and can't wait to hear your feedback on ways you can use these tools in your leadership.
One of the top three biggest questions we get at Reality-Based Leadership is, How do I get my team to buy-in? How do I get them to buy into what needs to be done? How do I get them to buy into strategies? How do we get people to buy into changes the organization needs us to execute on?
And the next question after that is, what do I do If I thought I had buy-in, and then it turned out it was fake, or it seems to be where people say they're bought in, but the behaviors are different?
So in this podcast, Cy and Alex talk about this pattern, if it's happening and how you might be able to address fake buy in, how you can go after more buy in, and the truth is, buy in is the first step of accountability.
It's about commitment. Buy in is a verb and if an individual isn't able to offer up their buy-in, it's really game over when it comes to happiness results in engagement at work.
So Cy and Alex do all they can to come up with our best techniques to help you go after buy-in, secure buy-in, but remember you can only work with the willing, you can't buy someone else in, and this podcast will give you some techniques to figure out what's really going on.
Many leaders struggle with giving freedom for their employees to do their best work, because they forget to provide some structure for them to work in.
In today's episode, Alex and Cy talk about leader's role in finding the balance between structure and play. In the conversation, they go into a key Reality-Based Leadership focus that all leaders need to have, is setting your nonnegotiable as a leader to then get people to buy into those. From there, people are allowed to bring their best self play in the workplace so to speak and create magic.
They also cover why it's so important to focus on this balance because too much structure and people believe we're over proceduralized. And they feel like they can't do any work and too much play, then it's really a free-for-all and innovation can't happen.
So the magic comes from just enough structure and then people are allowed to innovate and collaborate knowing they have the same basics, so this is a really, really important episode to setting the groundwork for good leadership and Cy and Alex can't wait to hear your thoughts.
If you're a leader that is currently leading your team through change, transformation, innovation, and noticing that there is a lot of resistance concern or fear, this is the podcast for you.
Cy and Alex dive deep into what they call Business Readiness, which is their modern take on traditional change management. In short, change management has been the name of the game in leadership for years and in many ways still is, but Reality-Based Leadership is starting to see that it is not ready for the modern workplace. It is a model that responds to change.
It notices change happening and then starts to manage it, where Business Readiness is a forward, thinking, leaning in to ensure that people are ready, willing, and able to deliver on what the business needs. This shift and mindset will help you transform in the way which your team embraces and sees it as an opportunity to capitalize on it, so where change management focuses on change being least disruptive to the people, Business Readiness is a model that helps you ensure that change is least disruptive to your customers, your patients, and your organization.
Cy and Alex go back-and-forth on how this connects to resilience and how you can build resilience in your people and readiness in your systems in your organization. And this sweet spot is how to disruption-proof your workplace and ensure that it can handle whatever change comes its way. You don't want to miss any word in this podcast, so be sure to tune in.
In this podcast, Cy and Alex discuss an important leadership concept they discovered while working on content for Alex's new book.
Traditional leadership advice often focuses on identifying the source of drama or conflict, and then applying a single tool to address it. However, Cy and Alex have found that the reality is often more complex - sometimes a sequence of tools is needed to help someone work through a barrier or frustration they're facing.
The framework they'll be covering is called the "Greatness Framework", and it involves three key steps: 1) Cleaning up - reflecting on the unpreferred reality or problem at hand, 2) Thinking - finding your space for impact, and 3) Taking the next right action.
The key insight is that you can't just talk someone through this process - it requires a more iterative, self-reflective approach using reality-based leadership tools. Cy and Alex believe this framework provides a practical way to apply the various leadership concepts they teach, in a structured sequence that helps people move towards "greatness." Tune in to learn more about this powerful new framework and how it can elevate your leadership abilities.
In this episode, Cy and Alex talk about activating the silent majority at work. Alex and Cy share how they are noticing a trend where leaders are getting a wrong read of the room, and they think they have more resistance than is actually there on their team.
Too often the loudest small minority of those focused on why we can't or why we shouldn't have to, get to dominate the entire conversation in a meeting, and the rest stays silent and doesn't jump in to add their input or perspective.
There are so many challenges in this that affects our teams, and leaders have many levers that they can pull in these situations that can be more helpful. In this episode, Alex and Cy share several techniques and ways that you can turn down the volume of those loud minority resistors, and turn up the volume of your silent majority that has a lot to say, but they are not participating.
In this episode, you'll learn about a powerful, practical tool called negative brainstorming, and how it activates the silent majority to improve dialogue and discussion in meetings and gives better feedback and data to those that might be in the loud minority.
Also, you'll learn that in this can be some compassion for those that are the loud resistors and why that's important. We also talk about that the dog bites and what that means we also talk about how sometimes these tools fall flat, but they are still successful, and we discuss why.
And lastly, we talk about the importance of taking verbal dialogue of that loud minority that's in resistance and moving it towards visual tools to bring in your silent majority. This episode is action packed, and it really can change everything about your team if you're struggling without changing anything. This is an effortless way to evolve your leadership, and we can't wait to hear what you think about this episode.
In today's episode, Alex and Cy talk about a pattern they're seeing out there that is really hurting leaders, creating conflict and burning them out. It's that they are over managing and under leading, and this is a sign of leaders being a little under-skilled to handle some challenges in their current reality. In that, Cy and Alex, talk about a simple, but very powerful concept to support leaders and making sure they're not over managing and under leading called goals, roles, and procedures.
And a big breakthrough for all listeners, is that as a leader, if you're clear on goals, clear on roles, then brace yourself you don't have to get so involved in procedures and execution, and in the weeds and jumping into fix and firefighting, so this is a really important concept to decrease conflict on your team, increase clarity and also empower everyone to fully step into their roles, even in times of change.
So Cy and Alex dive deep into how leaders can figure out are they part of the what, as far as strategy or what we're trying to do and or whether they're supposed to be into the how in the execution to deliver on that what. Cy and Alex discuss many ways that leaders are consistently getting into control and doing too much, and then they're leaving their teams believing they're the victims and this is how they can rise up evolve and really call their teams to greatness.
This episode packs a punch and will give you tons of clarity to improve your leadership of your team for the rest of the year Be sure to share this episode with all of your team members and discuss your biggest insight or takeaway.
Alex and Cy connected with Mike Lee to talk about the new rules of the future of leadership. Although these rules are simple rules that you might already know, the key insight is that for years, they have been nice to have, and now they're really the new rules to lead the up-and-coming workforce.
In the podcast, they cover some of the solid fundamentals of leadership, how keeping it simple as a leader is the most impactful. Going through what's called mental rehearsal to be a more prepared leader, the power of visualization, how modern leaders are legacy driven instead of outcome driven. And also some great ways to support people by loving them up and calling them up to greatness with some of Mike's best techniques.
This is an action packed episode with an individual who's worked with some of the top, high-performing people in the world.
Be sure to share this episode with all of your team members and discuss your biggest insight or takeaway.
Cy and Alex got looking ahead at their schedules and couldn't believe we're already a month away from National Nurse's day, National Nurse's week, National Hospital week, and they had healthcare on their mind for this week's podcast.
They wanted to talk about some of the trends they're seeing in healthcare and with the healthcare professionals they're working with in their sessions and in their coaching and wanted to share some ideas and tips on getting back to the basics, getting back to helping hope make a comeback and talking about ways that energy management can help us do the great work that we signed up to do in healthcare.
They hope this is a podcast that inspires a bit of hope, talks a bit about how Reality-Based Leadership might be the support that your teams are craving and why we'd love to be there in your system whether it's virtually or in person in the next month or so for the celebrations, so let's celebrate on this podcast, any healthcare professionals you have in your life and Cy and Alex share opportunities to hear some Reality-Based Leadership content soon to honor those amazing healthcare professionals.
In this podcast, they talk about getting back to the basics, why Reality-Based Leadership actually drives engagement and hope, and decreases burnout. Cy shares several stories, in which even in challenging circumstances with some tools of Reality-Based Leadership, people can get back to believing it's possible, believing it's doable, and Alex jumps in as well to share several stories of how teams are able to turn towards each other and succeed, in spite of challenging circumstances if they have some of the basics of RBL, and we're able to get them these tools. So this is a fun episode and pass it on to any healthcare professionals that you know and let them know that RBL is here to help them.
Be sure to share this episode with all of your team members and discuss your biggest insight or takeaway.
One of the core philosophies of living Reality-Based Leadership at work is to stop judging, start helping. People love this as a way to get started and dive right in, but sometimes their helping becomes doing everyone else's work, or jumping in to fix a lot of things. This creates the risk of becoming an over-functioner or an enabler in your workplace. So many people that just start reality-based leadership say that I started to say how can I help and next thing you know I was busier than ever and couldn't get my work done. This is another step in the evolution of being a reality-based leader is how to jump in to help without taking on everyone else's work.
In this episode, Cy and Alex talk about this pattern and how to watch for it and how to see when you're helping is actually hurting and how to begin saying yes and separating out how the work gets done to be able to keep momentum going and agree to goals but also keep your boundaries. With these boundaries, you're able to then take on the short term issues that need to be taken care of where you do jump in and fix, but then you can leave some space to have others help you with midterm issues and then long-term issues in the workplace.
Truly a powerful episode to make sure that one of the best tools of reality-based leadership doesn't get weaponized and used for evil. Enjoy, share with your colleagues and make sure you subscribe to the podcast and have discussions on this topic. We can't wait to hear from you.
Ever thought that doing Reality-Based Leadership might take the humanness out of work? What Alex and Cy cover in this session is that RBL actually brings the true humanness back to work. We don't try to bring our whole self to work but instead, we invite you to bring your most evolved self to work. This means that we're not trying to take the humanness out of work we're trying to limit the effect of the human condition on us doing our best work, or at least the lack of the human condition that leads to drama. So in this episode, Alex and Cy dive deep into how to bring your most evolved self to work. We discuss a great story about what happens when the judgments are reduced, and how humans create things in the world with less judgment. Also, we give you practical tips to ensure that people are finally able to bring their most authentic, evolved self to the workplace to do their best work in a highly engaged way. We can't wait to hear your feedback from this episode and make sure to subscribe and share with others to have a conversation about bringing the humanness back to work through Reality-Based Leadership.
Join Cy and Alex on this episode as they're diving into the latest trends for 2024, inspired by the fun ideas they've seen on TikTok and social media. Listen along as they explore leadership and work trends that are in and out for the year. With minimal preparation, they're taking a fresh look at what's shaping the future of work. First, they're talking about the importance of clarity in leadership. Forget the fancy tools and strategies—what's in is getting back to basics. They're discussing re-clarifying goals, roles, and procedures with your team. It may not sound glamorous, but it's essential for ensuring everyone is aligned and working towards the right objectives. On the flip side, what's out is leaders over-managing people and imposing their opinions. Instead, it's all about shared accountability. Leaders and teams alike need to take ownership of their actions and decisions, especially as we navigate new ways of working, whether in the office or remotely.
Join them as they discuss these trends and more, sharing insights and practical tips for thriving in the ever-evolving workplace in 2024.
To get the top 5 practical tools to lead your teams in the 2024 workplace grab Cy's Reality-Based Cheat Sheet PDF at the link below: https://info.realitybasedleadership.com/cheatsheet
Join Cy and Alex in this thought-provoking episode where they answer the challenging question of what to do with a 'toxic genius' or a high-perfomer that happens to be high-drama?
Inspired by an episode that Alex heard in which Brene Brown, Simon Sinek and Adam Grant brought up the concept and the challenge in handling these scenarios, Cy and Alex discuss the impact of this type of employee on the workplace and how leaders can navigate the situation. Cy and Alex dive deep into research from Reality-Based Leadership's 2nd book (Reality-Based Rules of the Workplace) and the Employee Value Equation that was able to get scientific and specific of the cost of drama. This equation gives you a self-assessment that can be used to start the conversation on reducing drama and doing better math on the value a high-performer that is costing a lot in emotional expensiveness to a team and organization.
This is one of the hardest leadership situations to approach and the tips and tools in this episode give you tons of direction in doing better math around the value each person on your team is adding to the work at hand.
Cy and Alex also touch on how this equation changes the conversation around quietly quitting and discuss the importance of not simply measuring performance, but also change readiness and emotional expensiveness of each person on a team.
Truly a fascinating conversation. We can't wait to hear your biggest takeaways!
Ready to take the Employee Value Equation self-assessment and calculate your drama-level? Don't be scared! This is the starting point to bringing your most evolved self to work.
info.realitybasedleadership.com/equation
Join Cy and Alex on this episode as they chat through the times someones shares, "But, we don't really have drama here." This is often where the loud drama (venting, complaining, gossip around the water cooler) isn't a big issue, but silent drama is out to play. Curious about the difference? You're not going to want to miss this episode.
Just a hint, silent drama often shows up as subtle lack of alignment to the strategies your organization is laying out or chronic resistance to change. These tougher to recognize workplace drama culprits really slow a team down and cause work to be more challenging than ever.
Download the Thinking Inside-The-Box tool: https://info.realitybasedleadership.com/box
To learn more or to book Cy or Alex to speak at your next event or training be sure to visit Reality-Based Leadership or fill out this form to connect with the team!
Join Cy and Alex as they have a fascinating conversation with Stephen Shedletzky (Shed) on how to Create a Speak Up Culture. Listen along as they dive into this topic and what it looks like when leaders in the workplace manage and nurture a safe space to empower others to speak up. You can find more on Shed by visiting his website here
Back by popular demand, Cy and Alex sit down to talk about the latest topics in leadership as they are out speaking on the circuit with the top leaders across the globe. The hottest topic that is coming up is all around trust and how it fits with leading in a Reality-Based way. How does trust fit in? Can you use the tools and principles you are talking about if trust isn't there?
Trust is absolutely important on a team and in a leadership moment when you are calling teams to greatness. However, trust can be layered with so many other things as a way for someone to avoid a call to greatness that could help them evolve.
Cy and Alex do a deep dive into trust in the workplace, some misconceptions with the topic, how it affects the team, and how trust isn't solely the responsibility of the leader to create.
So if you are looking for tips and ideas to:
- Create more trust on your team
- Build more trust in your culture
- Understand how to truly create sustainable trust at work
- Clarify why trust is such a hard thing to build with others
- Become more trustworthy in your life in a variety of work situations
Then this is the podcast for you.
Be sure to share this episode with all of your team members and discuss your biggest insight or takeaway.
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Cy Wakeman is the President and Founder of Reality-Based Leadership. Alex Dorr is VP of People Evolution at Reality-Based Leadership and has been standing side-by-side with Cy for almost a decade. Together, they have been helping leaders modernize their approach to leadership and to ditch the drama in the workplace.
To learn more or to book Cy or Alex to speak at your next event or training be sure to visit Reality-Based Leadership or fill out this form to connect with the team!
Join Cy in her interview with the amazing Dr. Laura, an Industrial/Organizational and Career Psychologist who has over 20+ years experience in the field. She is also a keynote speaker, thought leader, author and hosts her own podcast Where Work Meets Life. In this episode, they discuss how to lead your team effectively and efficiently while working remote. How to create a workplace, that supports people's mental well being. You can find Dr. Laura's work on her website at DrLaura.live
Join Cy in her interview with Chip Conley, founder of Modern Elder Academy where they discuss his transition from being a boutique hotelier for 24yrs to opening up the first midlife wisdom school in Baja, Mexico. Listen as he talks about what the school has to offer and what it means to say no to the narratives and the limits of past generations. You can learn more about him and his academy at Chipconley.com or by visiting the link above where you can also read his blog.
Join Cy in her interview with Adrian Koehler, host of The Naked Leadership Podcast where they discuss his transition from pediatric intensive care to running his own consulting company, being comfortable with what you don't know, managing your own needs, narrating your own story, and pushing through sources of fear. Find him on Instagram @adrian.k or his website takenewground.com
Join Cy in her discussion with Tim Davisson, former #1 consultant at Center for Creative Leadership (CCL) as they dive into the reality of imposter syndrome and finding your career path, the importance of inner work and staying present and curious. Want more? You can find Tim at www.thehigherimpactgroup.com
In this episode, Cy chats with Henry Albrecht, founder of Limeade, an industry-leading SaaS employee well-being company about the lessons he has gleaned from mining the data on the contributors to disease and well-being as well as how he moved beyond the “hustle” culture to create a life well-lived.
In this episode, Cy is joined by Mike Robbins, an expert in bringing humans together to do great work, to talk about the new leadership competencies of “holding space” “doing your inner work” and “tapping into the genius of the collective”. Discussions range from invitations to gather together to decide how and where we will work together to the fact that leaders can’t lead anyone where they aren’t themselves willing to go emotionally. Check out Mike and his work at Mike-Robbins.com.
Renee Smith, founder and CEO of A Human Workplace joins Cy on this episode to make the case for LOVE and why it belongs in the workplace. A great conversation on how to move from fear to love in your leadership. Check out Renee’s work at www.MakeWorkMoreHuman.com
Do you ever assume that mindfulness is what we do outside of the workplace to try and deal with the stress inside the workplace? That practices like meditation and gratitude are personal and that work is well all about achieving results? Then join me for a great paradigm-shifting conversation with Eric Holesapple, successful developer and entrepreneur and author of Profit with Presence and hear about how he has used mindfulness to transform his life and business and helps others to do the same. For more about Eric and his practices visit Livinginthegap.org.
In this episode, Cy Wakeman is joined by Tad Worku, songwriter, singer, Nurse Practitioner, and ER / Trauma nurse, who not only shares his story of finding the intersection of purpose, gifts, and passion but also provides strategies for keeping the focus on humanity of our patients in order to keep hope alive and love always remaining. AND - at the end - Tad gives us all a special gift - he performs one of his songs live, heart touching and a wonderful example of how Tad has combined his love of service with his award winning musical talents. Tadworku.com for more information on Tad’s incredible story and his availability to speak and perform at your organization.
Bestselling Author Dr. Sasha Shillcutt joins Cy in this episode to offer guidance and practical tools to help us all set boundaries to protect our physical and mental health and to live an empowered and peaceful life. This episode is full of great content as both Cy and Sasha share their personal and professional expertise on how we can overcome burnout and take back control of our time and our life by learning to set clear work-life boundaries.
Kelli Thompson, Women’s Leadership Coach and Speaker joins Cy on this episode to talk all things confidence. Her new book: Closing the Confidence Gap is hitting bookshelves on November 1st. Kelli and Cy talk about ways to close the confidence gap that will boost your peace, your potential and maybe even your paycheck. They also chat about their takes on imposter syndrome, quiet quitting and the difference between ego and confidence. This episode will help you.
If there is one thing we have learned in recent times, it's that we do not have to do it alone! Resiliency is not about being the toughest in the room, it's about finding the genius in the collective. In this interview, Cy talks with social workers Lori Gunther and Melissa Gehl, co-owners of Synova, whose mission is to create rewarding programs for Nurse Leaders. Listen in for tips to help hope make a comeback, lead a revolution of recovery, and succeed in spite of the facts. You will also learn about the new RBLNP program to help develop and retain your healthcare leaders!
In this episode, Cy talks with Robert Pardi, Transformational Life Coach, Author, Speaker about the power that self-reflection plays in healing ourselves and curating the life that fuels happiness in this messy world. Robert shares from experience how his wife’s death fueled both deep despair and also an incredible redesign of his current life. He shares the path he took to reconnect to his personal power and to the wonder of life and the power of questioning limiting beliefs while challenging himself to meet his greatness.
Keith Ferrazzi, the networking guru and author of “Never Eat Alone” joins Cy on this episode to share the findings and very practical high value practices for succeeding in the new world of work that resulted from his intensive research conducted during the pandemic. Keith’s new book, “Competing in the New World of Work” is HBR’s top pick in post pandemic books and Keith shares highlights for transforming your business models, redesigning you workforce and going forward to work in this new world instead of back to old work ways.
Ali Novitsky, M.D. joins Cy on her last podcast of 2021 with counter intuitive strategies to optimize your well-being. As a life coach and health enthusiast, Dr. Ali encourages us all to learn to relax and overcome perfectionism with a whole new take on your To Do list, preaches planning for and celebrating 10% performances on the daily, and ways to enhance your life by doing a whole lot less! You got to listen before you make any New Year’s Resolutions.
Jessica Tietjen, author of Exceptional Life R-Evolution and founder of Evolving to Exceptional joins Cy to talk about strategies to not only reach peak performance levels in your life and the life of your teams, but to call for a Revolution founded in each person’s evolution. Join us as Jessica shares the innovative techniques she used at her organization for building personal accountability in all aspects of life, even in your engagement efforts at work as well as how the Great Resignation can be the Great Reset instead.
People are not a means to an end and aren’t fulfilled being cogs in the wheel achieving some stated objective for the business and the Great Resignation is stating that loud and clear. In this episode, Cy had a great conversation with Robb Holman, Founder of Inside Out Leadership about how to use these times as a great wake up call for leaders - a call to do the inner work, to radically simplify, and put people over procedures to build something beyond engagement - true devotion, to the leader, the team and the purposed of the organization. www.MoveTheNeedleBook.com
Connections are the antidote to feeling burned out…. In this episode, Sasha Shillcutt, MD, MS and Cy get together to chat about burnout, resiliency, and living big, peaceful lives in current times. Sasha is the founder of Brave Enough and a fantastic leader in the Department of Anesthesia at UNMC.
Alli Myatt and Courtney Tungate, the co-founders of The Equity Practice join Cy in this episode of the No Ego Podcast to share what they have learned along the way to help others make equity work. Alli and Courtney give concrete and pragmatic recommendations on how to move beyond conversations about race to actions that support racial equity.
https://www.theequitypractice.com/team-who-we-are
Richard Medcalf is Founder of Xquadrant and an executive coach to some of the world's most impressive and successful CEOs and their teams. In this episode Richard shares four key insights that help his clients make real transformational progress in this area and become champions of transformational change. https://www.linkedin.com/in/richardmedcalf/ Free course: "Freeing Yourself Up For Strategic Activity: An Executive's Productivity Paradigm" https://xquadrant.com/go/productivity Impact Multiplier CEO Podcast https://xquadrant.com/podcast/
Jared Narlock, Speaker and Talent Development Coach, and author of Becoming a Peaceful Powered Leader, joins Cy in this episode to share the habits and dedications one needs to practice to be a peaceful powered leader - one transcends their own ego to build team members who can meet the challenges at hand in a state of contentment. https://www.peacefulpoweredleadership.com https://www.linkedin.com/in/jared-narlock/ https://twitter.com/JaredNarlock?s=20 https://www.instagram.com/jarednarlock/?hl=en Preorder the book now: https://www.amazon.com/Becoming-Peaceful-Powered-Leader-Courageously/dp/1631955330/ref=sr_1_4?crid=2ULQNIJG4H8ZL&dchild=1&keywords=jared+narlock&qid=1629141644&sprefix=jared+na%2Caps%2C181&sr=8-4
Cy is joined by her favorite IG licensed clinical psychologist Dr. Jamie Zuckerman to talk all about her observations on the pandemic ’s effect on our mental health, ways to stop trying to fix and instead manage anxiety, suggestions for supporting others in ways that actually help, and avoiding toxic positivity all together. IG @Dr.Z_psychologist https://www.drjaimezuckerman.co
The last year has revealed to many of us that the current state of our boundaries is disordered and in need of repair to avoid exhaustion and burnout. Join Cy and guest Terri Cole, MSW LCSW as they talk about how to become a boundary boss so you can live an authentic and fulfilled life.
http://boundaryboss.me/noego
With the vaccine situation improving, you are likely thinking about, or in the process of returning to the office. Gleb and I cover helpful benchmarking and best practices to aid in your return plan.
Find the full white paper here: https://tinyurl.com/TheOfficeReturn
Erica Dhawan, author of Digital Body Language, joins me this week to discuss her new book and building connection in the digital era.
Frank Calderoni - Chief Executive Officer of Anaplan joins Cy on this episode to talk about how he has used company character to align brand, strategy and experience to build a foundation for success at Anaplan.
Preorder Frank's new book, Upstanding, at https://www.amazon.com/Upstanding-Company-Character-Catalyzes-Hypergrowth/dp/1119746493
We are certainly heading towards some pleasure, some decadence. Many predict something similar to the roaring 20’s that followed the Spanish flu pandemic – pleasure does most certainly follow pain but the two are kindred spirits in the same cycle that is predictable and always returns to pain – why?
Feelings have good information – goal is to experience them completely. Important for leaders to develop the ability to hold space for people to share their experiences AND important for individuals to learn to self-regulate and take ownership for their own feelings and their own emotional experience.
This week we break down Projection and how it is showing up in our hybrid workplaces. We need to change the way in which we are having conversations and managing our energy to open up the opportunity for the BIG conversations that will determine how we move forward. Join me as we work through the Thinking Inside-The-Box Tool as well.
Newsletter Sign-Up: https://www.realitybasedleadership.com/newsletter/
Thinking Inside-The-Box Tool: https://www.realitybasedleadership.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/Ego-Bypass-Tool-Thinking-Inside-the-Box-Exercise.pdf
Season 4 is in full swing! In this episode I break down ways to build your inner wisdom using some tools and tricks adapted to today's challenges.
Today I have a short version of my most recent keynote addressing living Reality-Based in these challenging times!
Uncertainty and ambiguity are universally difficult mind states for all human beings that inevitably produce stress, anxiety, and fear. If this is pervasive in the culture, we are all affected. It is pervasive now.
Join me as I discuss these challenges and more with Jacqueline Anderegg, LCMSW.
When I hear people talk about trust in the workplace, I get concerned because we make it sound like something we can create for another. But that leaves us dependent on other people, and creates situations where people end up waiting to be offered something. When you say there is a lack of trust in your organization, is it due to leadership or due to your own choices? That's what I want to get into today. Whether or not you trust someone has a lot to do with you.
Episode Originally Aired: March 08, 2018
When you are blaming others for your circumstances and not taking control of your own actions, that is when your ego really comes out swinging. And I want to get into today one of the major factors of blame, something I like to call learned helplessness. Learned helplessness is the opposite of accountability, and personal accountability is the death of the ego. And we all know that when you ditch your ego, it allows for growth and collaboration.
Episode originally aired: February 21, 2018
In today's episode I want to talk about conflict. As a researcher, I've spent so many hours dissecting and trying to understand conflict and why it happens. What I've found is this: so much of the time, the root cause of conflict is ambiguity. And a leader's job is to facilitate clarifying conversations. Listen in for more on this and what else I've discovered are the best ways to fix it.
Episode: Jan 31, 2018
In today's episode, I talk about why you should live your life with great expectancy instead of expectations. There's a big difference, so I want you to dive into it with me and see how drastically different it can make your day to day.
Episode originally aired December 14, 2017.
Accountability: it's a topic I bring up a lot because I believe it is one of the most misunderstood words in today's workplace. How do you measure for it? What is the end goal? And how do you introduce it to your company? I sat down with Jackie Froendt from Home Instead Senior Care to talk about all these things and so much more. Sidenote: we were meeting to film my new Facebook Watch show, Life's Messy Live Happy! Check out my Facebook to tune in to that as well.
Episode originally aired: December 7, 2017
With the holidays approaching, and the added stress that can come with them, I thought I'd focus on one big topic of mine today: that suffering is completely optional. I don't say this to be insensitive or trite - it's just that so much of our suffering comes from stories we make up in our own head and not reality. In today's episode, I'll show you tools you can use to fix that and be stress free this holiday season.
Episode Originally Aired: November 30, 2017
In this week's episode, I answer the often asked question, “How do I make someone change?” with a surprising answer. You can’t make anyone do anything - but, you can stop enabling them. When you stop enabling your teammates, it 's the quickest way to ensure that their relationship with reality is a direct one and that they have the best information possible with which to make better decisions.
Episode Originally Aired: Nov 2, 2017
I got wind of a fan of who was starting their own reality-based leadership revolution at their company so I surprised them with a phone call. We managed to capture the conversation and get great tips on how to start from where you are, even if it's not a company sanctioned program.
Episode Originally Aired: Oct 23, 2017
In this episode, the last of the exclusive book club calls, I talk about why I believe our approach to change management has been one of the biggest fuels of drama in the workplace. We are asking ourselves, how can change be least disruptive to our team? But what we should be asking is: how can we make change least disruptive to our business? By making sure our teams are always ready for what's next.
Episode Originally Aired: October 9, 2017
Another great episode for you guys today - last month I hosted a number of informal, exclusive, member only chats for everyone in my book club. Excited to share the second one with you all now, just for my podcast listeners! Listen in.
Episode originally aired: October 3, 2017
In this episode, I'm switching things up a bit! Recently I had an exclusive call with all the members of my No Ego Book Club where I talked for a bit and answered questions. But the content was so good, I am now releasing it here for all of you to hear as well! Enjoy.
Episode Originally Aired: August 29, 2017.
For this episode today, I want to go a little bit deeper into how exactly you can get your team to understand what great looks like quickly. How can you say to your team with confidence "Go be great"?
Episode Originally Aired: August 21, 2017.
In episode 5, I tell a story from my time as a leader in the healthcare system working with nurses. A nurse came to me and asked to speak with me and I knew venting was coming, thus I used one of my favorite techniques for self-reflection and getting people back on track: I called her up to greatness. If there's one question I ask people to get them out of ego and into self-reflection, it's this.
Originally aired on August 18, 2017.
In today's podcast, I talk about one of the core philosophies of my reality-based leadership: stop judging, start helping. It's integral for an organization to understand this to function without drama. Tune in and see how you can apply it to your workplace.
Episode originally aired August 7th, 2017
This episode today is about what I believe to be my greatest idea, the discovery that I feel is my biggest contribution to society. That idea is this: happiness isn't something we pursue, it's our natural state once drama is gone. Listen to this episode for the full story.
Episode originally aired August 1st, 2017.
Today, I want to talk about a concept called "Co-Creation". Most of us don't know we have the access to it and how important of a resource it can be in our day to day life.
Your ego narrates the world in your favor. This means you're always getting a distorted interpretation of reality. Learn how to get mentally flexible and stop believing everything you think.
Episode originally aired July 3rd, 2017.
In our culture we often try shoulder through adversity and difficulty with a focus on “mastery” - how can I figure it, master the skills required and move through what is happening in a way that limits my pain? In this episode, one of my suggestions is that a great counterbalance is to focus on building the emotional and mental muscle required to live into the mystery of the moment and the times. I discuss ways to use current experiences to evolve one’s capacity to do challenging things that ultimately lead to great peace and happiness in life like “letting go” and creating space for the creative to arrive.
If you want to up your game personally and professionally, you don’t want to miss my new program the Life’s Messy, Live Happy Group starting in October. A year-long experience filled with monthly group experiences, exclusive new content, and a ton of new ways to explore your internal world and grow beyond your past abilities. Don’t miss out, get registered now and bring your friends and colleagues. Register in the link below!
info.realitybasedleadership.com/lmlh)
Think great connections that add value can’t happen virtually – think again. Maha Abouelenein, now Chief Value Officer at Vaynermedia, slipped into Cy’s DM’s, brought her to Egypt and the two have been creating value together ever since. In this episode, Maha shares the path to success isn’t about going after what you want – it is adding value to others and then watch what happens. She shares great tips for communicating in a virtual world, redesigning your own value proposition and informs you that you have a personal brand whether you intend to or not. Join us for great tips on how to not only survive world crisis but on how to impact the world in crisis.
If you would like support and guidance in rounding out your mastery of the competencies that we will need going forward to not only lead, but to live peacefully and happily in the newest normal, check out my new offering – Life’s Messy, Live Happy Group. No need to wait for me to speak at your organization or a conference near you – I am coming to you directly, with all new content, new assignments for self-reflection and all in a community of Reality-Based Leaders who want to not only stay relevant but be ready to contribute to teams and lives in significant ways. Check out the link below!
info.realitybasedleadership.com/lmlh
This week I continue my reflections and teachings on gratitude even when life is messy. I share how my gratitude practice evolved from just counting my blessings to counting everything as a blessing. Being thankful is a wonderfully positive way to live and definitely increases level of happiness. Transcending beyond duality and accepting impermanence, I share the key to gratitude in these times, OUR times. You may not be able to find gratitude for what is happening in our world but you can be grateful in every moment it is happening and step up and co-create a new reality for our future.
If you would like support and guidance in rounding out your mastery of the competencies that we will need going forward to not only lead, but to live peacefully and happily in the newest normal, check out my new program – Life’s Messy, Live Happy Group. No need to wait for me to speak at your organization or a conference near you – I am coming to you directly, with all new content, new assignments for self-reflection and all in a community of Reality-Based Leaders who want to not only stay relevant but be ready to contribute to teams and lives in significant ways. Check it out in the link below!
info.realitybasedleadership.com/lmlh
These may be challenging, unprecedented times, but these are OUR times. Cy flies solo in the podcast and makes the call to greatness for all of us - let what is happening in our world and in your life evolve you, as a leader and as a human. Cy reveals the focus on her newest book, Life’s Messy, Live Happy and challenges us all to a personal evolution. Gratitude is more than a list, more than counting our well-deserved blessings, it goes deeper, leading us to get in touch with our privilege and the gifts of others in our lives. Going deep into gratitude can fuel our own giving as we pay forward in the personal and specific ways we were helped. Gratitude can be your path to impacting the world beyond giving where you can.
BIG NEWS! I am revealing an exciting new opportunity to go deep with me in the Life’s Messy, Live Happy Group beginning in October 2020. Check out the opportunity at this link: INFO.REALITYBASEDLEADERSHIP.COM/LMLH
A big topic of discussion today is if accountability is still relevant. I continue to answer fan questions about fostering accountability while also empathizing with challenging circumstances face by many. I reveal my own take on how Leadership Development and Training will need to be modernized, innovative approaches in HR policy and practices to support parents working while supervising kids at home and practical tips for helping managers adapt to leading virtual work teams. Towards the end, I discuss the true drivers of motivation to succeed in today's reality.
Ask me your questions in the link below!
https://share.hsforms.com/1a49pq87BSTeMkAD7GXKNMQ4mjbd
I return to you all with a solo episode to respond to the many questions from leaders wondering if accountability is still relevant in times of crises. The answer - absolutely - in fact fostering accountability is the key to growing teams and evolving people into high value talent today and in the future. Accountability and empathy are not mutually exclusive and accountability doesn’t have to hurt. I advocate for increasing the support rather than lowering the standards and as always, give listeners great practical guidance for how to care about your people, honor their unique circumstances in their lives AND call them to greatness.
Get your tickets for the Ditch The Drama Tour - Now Virtual! on August 28, 2020:
https://registration.sonburst.com/cywakeman/virtualroadshow
Sarah Morgan of Buzzaroony LLC - an HR consultant, coach, speaker, writer and request guest on the No Ego Podcast gives her practical advice direct from the frontlines in HR - for returning teams to work and supporting those who have never left. Sarah provides some fantastic food for thought, “Can the rush to get back to “normal” become more disruptive than the current WFH arrangement?" Join us to know what is helping and hindering businesses as they face major decisions about how to work in the near future and get some great strategies to customize your employee support efforts to the specific situations at hand.
Plus, a special code to get a discount on a coveted seat at Sarah’s upcoming HROI Summit - hint: NOEGO is all you need. Get your tickets! https://www.eventbrite.com/e/hroi-summit-tickets-112327494560
Register for my very own Ditch The Drama Tour - Now Virtual! Save the date August 28th. You do not want to miss this amazing opportunity.
Get your tickets here! https://registration.sonburst.com/cywakeman/virtualroadshow
I gave my good friend and mentor Steven Matthew Adams a ring to get his best strategies on living peacefully and happily as the world remains on lock down. Steven is an internationally-celebrated author, keynote speaker and self-actualization coach, based in NYC, whose mission it is to help others live the lives they were meant to live even when the world seems to be falling apart. Listen in for a great conversation about what the pandemic is revealing to us and our suggestions for ensuring that we all emerge from our time at home an evolved person with higher levels of consciousness and insight. And if you love what you hear from Steven, check out his book, “On the Way” available on Amazon.
Get your tickets to the Ditch the Drama Tour 2020 - Now Virtual on August 28, 2020!
https://www.realitybasedleadership.com/dtd2020/
Doug Claffey, Founder and Chief Strategy Officer at Energage joins Cy to share some surprising research results on employee engagement during the world health crisis. Bottom line - it appears that the Top Workplaces get even better in the midst of a crisis. Cy and Doug unpack the research in the increase of engagement levels since COVID-19 hit and working from home became the new norm. Curious to find out what is driving increased employee engagement? Here is a hint - great communication, high levels of appreciation, and frequent connections. Tune in to hear lessons learned that will help drive engagement and great culture regardless of organizational challenges.
The Ditch The Drama Tour - Now Virtual | August 28th, 2020
Get your tickets and register now!
https://www.realitybasedleadership.com/dtd2020/
This episode with Sasha Shillcutt, MD is FILLED with great strategies to finding joy, even in the midst of the pandemic. Join in to learn how we use over-functioning, mental escapes, self-soothing, and hustle to keep ourselves from our greatest insights and future growth. Learn to stay curious, get still and stop deferring happiness as Cy and Sasha share their own personal revelations that emerged during the World Health Crisis.
Register/Sign up and find more information on the Ditch The Drama Tour. You do not want to miss this opportunity!
https://registration.sonburst.com/cywakeman/virtualroadshow
https://www.realitybasedleadership.com/dtd2020
Follow Sasha Shillcutt, MD (@becomebraveenough) and Register for her Elevate Summit in the link below!
https://braveenough.mykajabi.com/brave-enough-elevate-summit
Dear Cy has returned to Season 3 as Cy responds to listeners emails on their current challenges. In response to a great email from a fan asking for ways to immediately impact racial equity at work, Cy invited Pam Bourne, Employment attorney and friend to share ideas for where to begin. Cy and Pam talk openly about their own realizations of their own racism and ignorance along with concrete ideas to turn awareness into action at work for leaders and HR. Listen in to hear how you can act the part of leader ally at work.
To send me a letter or ask me your questions, click on this link!
https://share.hsforms.com/1a49pq87BSTeMkAD7GXKNMQ4mjbd
Register for the HROI Summit!
https://mailchi.mp/137ae04a4814/register-now-for-the-hroi-summit?e=[UNIQID]
Recently I've been reminded of Post-Traumatic Growth and our ability to transform after some pretty difficult experiences. Many are wondering at this time in our history if we will recover, not just economically but as a team and as a nation. We have proven to be a resilient human race throughout history and studies. Post-Traumatic Growth (PTG) suggest that not only we will recover, but we will demonstrate the immense human capacity for resiliency and growth.
Cy calls for leaders to instill hope in their teams, calling for the ability to imagine many beautiful and positive outcomes so that we can emerge from the traumas of the past months as better humans and more cohesive teams. Leaders need to facilitate not just surviving, but profound growth that will fuel the creation of a better workplace.
I have two assignments for you this week:
#1. Sit down and spend time with the envisioning of many possible positive outcomes.
#2. Find ways to commit to them without attachment.
On this past weekend from the 4th of July, I reflected a lot on Freedom - the ultimate pursuit for many. I recount how Independence Day changed in meaning to me and my family to become Interdependence Day. I call on all of you to reflect on how the ego coopts our accomplishments meant to bring us freedom and uses it to “imprison” us. Join in and learn why we can become prisoners of our own minds and how inquiry can regain mental freedom which fuels great leadership.
As leaders, we are being stretched to use get fluent in a variety of new competencies and this week, I will be going deep into the art of “Holding Space” in order to maximize the impact our current world can have on the evolution of you and your team.
On this episode I deliver an advanced lesson in going beyond ego in response to a trend in the questions being sent in, “How should I handle the tough conversations that need to happen at work?’ Leaders are looking for what to do and how to do it right when it comes to addressing the conversations happening in the world as they are brought to work. Here’s the reality, jumping directly into action is premature. Now is the time to ensure that many are being heard and that is at times uncomfortable.
I believe resilience is one of the most important competencies we can develop as individuals and businesses if we want success, peace, and happiness. For businesses, it's about keeping people ready for what's next, preparing them with the skills & mindsets to tackle challenging circumstances. For individuals, it's about how you curate your life, build your networks, how you respond to disruption and uncertainty. And you'll love hearing my research on what the most resilient people had in common.
During stressful times or big change, have you noticed that it’s easier to get our feelings hurt, and we are quickly triggered by the actions or words of others? This is your ego in play! In this episode, we’re going to talk about how to respond when your feelings get hurt, which involves understanding our triggers, moving beyond judgment and setting boundaries. We’ll also talk about how negative thoughts and shaming can overtake our thinking.
Loving this podcast? Please tell me what you think by dropping a rating and a review!
This week I am sharing a conversation I had on Facebook Live about resilience. I think many of us are learning a lot about ourselves since this pandemic started about our own resiliency and the resiliency of our team. I get asked all the time about how to teach teams how to be more resilient. I'll address all of this and more in this episode.
Loving this podcast? I'd love to hear from you! Leave me a rating and a review.
This is a special episode I am reposting this week as it deserves to be heard again at this very difficult time in our country. It's a conversation with a great friend of mine in the HR world, Sarah Morgan of @thebuzzonhr. Her Leading in Color podcast, blog and #BlackBlogsMatter challenge are amazing and I appreciate her work to evolve HR practitioners and workplaces everywhere. The topic of our conversation is about a blog she wrote: "What's in an Ally?" and the 5 things that make you an ally and how to deal with tough issues surrounding diversity and inclusion at work.
Resources:
Blog: https://bit.ly/2k25yOG
Book: We Can't Talk About That at Work: https://amzn.to/2kgevnK
Book: Me and White Supremacy: https://amzn.to/2kgeEaM
This week, we’re going to a more vulnerable place. We’re going to talk about things or people in your life you are feeling resentment towards, or are feeling a large degree of frustration or annoyance with. Have you noticed this in yourself lately? You'll hear real experiences from my fans both in work and personal settings, and I'll share how to reframe your thinking and move forward.
Have a question you want me to answer? Submit it anonymously here.
Let’s talk about accountability. Do you think this is a taboo topic right now with your team or co-workers? Here’s the secret folks. We can cultivate accountability with our people AND show a lot of empathy. This episode is all about how to call our teams and co-workers to greatness in spite of what is happening in our world now. Remember: Reality is tough; Leadership is love.
Loving this podcast? Leave me a rating and a review! I’d love to hear from you!
I have an important topic to cover this week that I think many of us are feeling right now or have felt at some point during this pandemic: anxiety. Most of us blow right by anxiety and right into behaviors, denying those feelings, or avoiding the work to process it. I'm going to challenge you to notice where anxiety has showed up in your life right now. Then I'll share how to better understand your anxiety and work through it.
Have a question you want me to answer on an upcoming podcast? Submit it anonymously here: https://bit.ly/35jTfiX
This week, I want to talk about how we can hold space for others, widen our perspective of what others are going through, and not allow our ego to make quick judgments right now. I also want to discuss how we can make what I call repair attempts (AKA: mulligans, do-overs, making amends!) when we screw up.
Join me on Facebook Live this week on Thursday, May 14 at Noon CST. https://bit.ly/2SNhEcy
Boy, are we learning a lot about ourselves and others during this quarantine! Have you stopped to notice and pay attention? This podcast is all about listening to what you have discovered about yourself during this time. What has been better? What has been worse? What has surprised you? The more we tune into how this time has changed us, the more we can grow.
Ask me your questions on this week's Facebook Live on Thursday, May 7, 12:00 PM CST: https://bit.ly/3d05ox1
Today's podcast is a rapid-fire of questions all related to how we're doing - emotionally - during this pandemic. No two people are experiencing this pandemic alike. While some have too much time and feel lonely, others are overwhelmed and wish they had more time. Still, some others are losing their jobs and those they love most, causing incredible grief and stress. One thing is for sure is that we are getting a good lesson in how to process all of these emotions. I hope this episode will help you do just that.
Join me on Facebook Live on Wednesday, April 29 for live Q&A: https://bit.ly/2Kw0GuN
Two themes are emerging for me in your pandemic questions this week: finding space for others and getting perspective. Our egos are flaring up right now and seeing insult where there isn't any, and we have to be ready to combat it.
Q's answered:
- I am a nurse manager. How can I give good communication to my team and help them focus on the task at hand when there is so much fear, anxiety, and stress?
- My director is micro-managing me and not letting our team do our jobs.
- What are your tips for defusing my anger when I get unwanted feedback?
Join me on Facebook Live this Thursday, April 23 12:00 PM CST
This week I'm answering 4 of your questions as we continue to find our way through this challenging time. My biggest hope is that you can find peace amidst the chaos.
Questions answered:
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I want to continue working from home, while my co-workers are at the office. How do I ask for what I need?
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I feel anxious and distracted working at home right now. How can I refocus and get back to productive work?
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I am extroverted and realize that I get a lot of my motivation and confidence from others. How can I nip that insecurity in the bud and stop being such people pleaser?
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How can I help my team and co-workers rise above the chaos, drama, and anxiety and stay focused on the task at hand?
Join me on Facebook Live this Thursday, 4/16 12:00 PM CST https://bit.ly/2Vkv7ca
This week, I'm back to answering your questions about surviving this pandemic:
- How can I deal with staff anger and resentment when they are now asked to account for their time at home?
- I see the benefit of routine, but how can we establish new routines that work for our current situation?
- I'm a nurse manager. How can I support my team who is angry about things out of our control?
- I'm fearful that our company is only thinking about short-term vs. planning for the long-term!
Join me on Facebook Live this Tuesday & Thursday for live Q&A. https://bit.ly/34fnvf2
I'm going to pause on my current podcast series so I can come to you weekly with my thoughts, reflections, tips, and techniques for how to move through this time together successfully. How can we simply survive this time we have been given, or dare I say, thrive? I'm going to talk about two mantras that are so powerful for me right now: Love Wins & Evolve Yourself
I'd love to hear your questions! What challenges are you facing? How can I help?
Send me your questions anonymously here and I may answer it on an upcoming episode!
I'd love to come to you as often as possible during this strange and confusing time. Right now, maybe you're like me and feeling A LOT of emotions. That's why I thought it would be important to talk about how to process these emotions and to not let them turn into your suffering.
Please let me know in the comments if these are helpful and if you would like to see more!
I'd love to hear from you.. what questions do you have for me? Submit yours anonymously here.
When you come into a new leadership role, it's common for your ego to come out to play. In this case, fear took over the ability to move to action, stories overrode facts, victims and villains were alive and well. But when you can move beyond your ego and fear, and give yourself some compassion, it's amazing how well you will be able to lead.
Check out Steven's book, Along the Way
Submit your Dear Cy Letter to me anonymously here!
With the frequent updates and changes to our daily lives because of COVID-19, I am sure many of you are feeling uncertain, scared, or just not sure how to lead at this time. I wanted to share some thoughts about how I'm trying to move through this rapidly changing and uncertain world at this time, and I hope it helps you in some way.
This week, I'm answering a fan letter with one of my favorite people and personal lifestyle coach, Steven Matthew Adams. This letter is all about how to practically - in real-life - move beyond your ego on a daily basis. What can you do to stay neutral in your behaviors and responses, how can you toggle up in spite of your realities? This isn't difficult to do, it just takes some daily practice. I hope you enjoy!
Check out Steven's book, Along the Way.
Submit your Dear Cy Letter anonymously here!
This week's Dear Cy letter is from someone leading a multi-disciplinary team that takes care of patients with chronic diseases. She isn't a nurse herself and believes that her team doesn't respect her as a leader because of it. She admits being conflict-averse and should have taken a more pro-active approach. Ultimately she wants to know how to hone her skills and put her ego aside to be a more effective leader.
Send me your Dear Cy letters! I'd love to answer your question. Submit it anonymously here.
Alex and I are answering a fan letter this week from a mom who writes about working hard to get a degree in early childhood education but then finds herself in a completely different role as a cook in the center where she is working. How she can find the opportunity in this role when she has worked so hard to obtain a career in teaching? We're going to talk about how your ego gets in the way and reframing this situation to grow where you are planted.
Send me your Dear Cy letters! I'd love to answer your question. Submit it anonymously here: https://bit.ly/35jTfiX
This week, we're back to answering Dear Cy letters, and I think you're going to love this week's topic: Burnout. This is a big topic right now, especially for healthcare folks, but it's something we can all experience regardless of our job or industry. We're going to dive into handling burnout from a manager/leader standpoint, as well as managing your own wellbeing and self-care. I'm also going to cover something I call energy management and why unplugging is not always the solution! Hear more on this topic in my podcast with Dr. Sasha Shillcutt: https://bit.ly/39LaATQ
This week, I wanted to share a brief overview of the top 5 sources of drama at work that I found in my research. I know many of you have heard me talk about ego as a main source of drama, but did you know there are 4 other major contributors? Here's the great news: If we can understand these sources of drama, and work to manage them for ourselves and our teams, there’s nothing that can stop you from producing amazing results and reaching your potential, not to mention living a happier and more peaceful life. I hope you enjoy listening in.
More info about the sources of drama in my book, No Ego. https://amzn.to/2vqHWIE
Today I'm doing a little something special. I'm sharing a keynote that will help you understand the why behind your stress & frustration at work, or why you don't get the results that you want. I also share the tools and techniques you can use immediately at work or at home. No matter if you are a leader or an individual contributor, this episode will help you find greater peace, happiness, and success in life.
Have a workplace drama question for me? Send me your "Dear Cy" letter here and it may be featured on an upcoming episode!
This week Alex and I are diving into two fan letters where the ego really wants to take hold and be right. One letter deals with a person trying to get a co-worker to change their victim behaviors, lack of accountability and unwillingness to get on board. The second letter asks how they can deal with a new manager that is less experienced than they are. Tons of juicy content in this episode that you can't miss!
Submit your own Dear Cy letter to me anonymously here: https://bit.ly/35jTfiX
This week, we're back to answering fan letters! And this one is from a person who is in a complex, goal-oriented team that is frustrated by "unattainable" goals set by their boss, indicating that the team is also frustrated and unmotivated as a result. Said boss is also resistant to feedback and a poor communicator. Alex and I are going to deconstruct this letter and see if we can get down to the facts! Topics we'll cover: editing your story, leading with sympathy vs. empathy, shifting energy from "why we can't" to "how we could."
Find the tools we mentioned for free here: https://bit.ly/2NXrPJj
I'm excited to introduce you to a friend and colleague, Dave McKeown, who blew my mind when I first heard him speak and found our messages are so well aligned. Dave is the Founder & CEO of Outfield Leadership, and is also a speaker, author, and trainer. We're talking about why with billions of dollars spent on leadership development, we're still not getting results. This episode shares our thoughts on how leaders can gain more power over their own development and increase their results.
Learn more about the book at www.SelfEvolvedLeader.com
I'm so excited to be launching Season 3 of the No Ego Podcast! This season is dedicated to your in-depth letters as you work to practice RBL at work and home. Our first letter is from Kimberly. She works in an org where most have adopted RBL philosophy. However, she tells of how some people have written off the philosophy, even when she can see this philosophy is the answer to their problems. Bottom line, her question is: How can I handle the resistors? Send me your 'Dear Cy' letter! https://bit.ly/35jTfiX
Hey folks! We're taking this week off and will be back next week with a brand new season, dedicated to your questions. I'm not just talking one sentence, but in-depth letters about what you're experiencing in the workplace as your work to live and lead drama-free. See you next week!
Join us on the Dich the Drama Tour 2020! https://bit.ly/2s7hG4W
The Carvery with Alex Dorr Podcast:
iTunes: https://apple.co/38YDxfw
GooglePlay: https://bit.ly/2PGdZMz
Spotify: https://spoti.fi/38XyBYd
I'm taking time in this episode to reflect on the key themes that caught my attention this year, as well as things I am entertaining in the new year to continue in my evolution and curation of my life. Some key themes you'll hear about is why I'm choosing self-care over self-soothing, my goals to stay curious longer and not naming things too soon, as well as a preview of my next book, which will be a personal reflection on how life is messy but we can still live happy. Season 3 starts January 13! Have a question for me? Submit it here: https://bit.ly/35jTfiX
The final episode in this Q&A series has more great workplace drama topics, including:
- how to have tough conversations with employees
- how to roll out the employee value equation with your team
- overcoming your fear of speaking up, especially when dealing with someone in power
Learn about our Certification Program. Our next class is on March 18-20, 2020! https://bit.ly/2KQDqYM
Season 3 of the Podcast starts Jan. 13, 2020! I'll be answering your in-depth "Dear Cy" letters. Submit your own letter here: https://bit.ly/35jTfiX
In the 3rd episode of this 4-part series, I'm sharing more of my Q&A with our Certified Facilitators. In today's episode, we're talking about how I use tools to manage people out of their ego's grip, including these tools:
- The Thinking-Inside-the-Box Tool to increase individual commitment and accountability
- The SBAR Tool to empower people to solve their own problems
- The Edit Your Story tool to move people out of venting
Learn about our Certification Program. Our next class is on March 18-20, 2020! https://bit.ly/2KQDqYM
I'd love to have you join me on the Ditch the Drama Tour! Get your tickets now: https://bit.ly/369jVTQ
This week, I'm continuing with the 4-part series from Certification where I'm doing some live Q&A. We're getting into why we need to filter our engagement surveys by accountability, how leaders can create a reality-based culture, sharing a feeling vs. venting, and how leaders can stop enabling bad behavior. Learn more about our Certification Program. Our next class is on March 18-20, 2020! https://bit.ly/2KQDqYM Join me on the Ditch the Drama Tour! Get your tickets now: https://bit.ly/369jVTQ
I think you're going to love this exclusive 4-part Q&A session with our Certified Facilitators where I talk candidly about:
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the toggle switch concept, and why it's important for both leaders and employees
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how to effectively use self-reflection questions to bypass ego
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how leaders hinder accountability
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managing employees who vent and share unhelpful opinions
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how to create shared accountability in meetings
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why engagement has everything to do with us; not our circumstances.
Learn about our Certification Program: https://bit.ly/2KQDqYM
I've known Robb Holman for years and we're both out there speaking and training to change hearts and minds! I fell in love with Robb's first book, Lead the Way, which helps leaders self-reflect on their value from the inside, and now in his new book coming out this week, All In, he teaches us how to build trust, bring out the best in each other and proactively connect with our teams.
Learn more at GetAllInBook.com
Join me on the Ditch the Drama Tour: RealityBasedLeadership.com/DTD2020
Dr. Lynn Marie Morski is a quitting evangelist. She helps people quit strategically through her book, Quitting by Design, and her podcast, Quit Happens, along with speaking and coaching. I first heard her speak this year and was in love with her humorous presentation and her practical tips for quitting those things in our life that are holding us back from greater joy and peace. I especially loved creating the "no" list!
Buy her book at https://quittingbydesign.com/
Follow her on Instagram @quittingbydesign
I'm reposting this very special podcast that I recorded last year around Thanksgiving. As we are upon the holiday season in our country, I find myself reflecting on gratitude and what it means in my life. In this episode, I'm talking about my view of gratitude, how we can go beyond only being grateful what you agree with or are happy about, and learning how to move to a place beyond ego where you can find gratitude in all things.
Loving this podcast? Leave me a rating and a review! I'd be so grateful.
In this week's episode, I'm answering two fan questions about how to handle difficult employee situations, including coaching the difference between sharing feelings and venting, and getting people to focus on their own business and "stay in their lane."
Questions answered:
- What is the difference between sharing a feeling vs. venting?
-Do you have any tips on helping keep employees in their own lane?
Season 3 of the Podcast is coming! Submit a letter to me with your workplace drama questions and I may answer it on an upcoming show! https://bit.ly/2Pc9LKa
Ever felt like you are high-functioning and killing it at work, and then your relationships at home suffer or you don't have the energy to put into them? My guests Dr. Mark and Ali Novitsky help us understand why this happens to couples and how can we move towards greater awareness and understanding, and working just as hard at our personal relationships as we do our work relationships. Learn more about Ali: https://mindbodymarriage.com/ Learn more about Mark: https://www.novitskymd.com/ Resuscitate Your Marriage Podcast: https://apple.co/2BLqeQ1
My guest this week is a clinical and forensic neuropsychologist and co-host of The Doctors. She regularly appears as an expert psychologist on TV and is the author of Stop Self-Sabotage. In our chat, Dr. Ho shares the 4 factors that trigger self-sabotage as well as practical techniques for moving beyond these negative thought patterns. We also talk about the imposter syndrome, aligning values with your goals and how to better handle change. Follow Judy @drjudyho Buy her book: Stop Self-Sabotage
In our 4th and final episode in this series, Dr. Sasha Shillcutt and I are talking about how we as women tend to play small, minimize our successes and think, it's just too good to be true. The reality is that these thoughts are rooted in fear and scarcity, and we can all choose to move beyond this negative self-talk in order to achieve more joy in our lives.
We'd love it if you shared this series with all the women in your life!
Follow both of us @cywakeman and @become_brave_enough
Have a question for us? Submit it anonymously here: https://bit.ly/2Pc9LKa
I'm excited to introduce you to Safi Bahcall, a physicist, entrepreneur, and the bestselling author of Loonshots. Safi talks about the competing forces in a company that suddenly change from embracing wild new ideas to rigidly rejecting them. So many organizations are focused on culture, but Safi emphasizes the importance of small shifts in the structure of an organization that can have a radical breakthrough in group behavior.
Buy Loonshots: loonshots.com
Follow Safi @SafiBahcall
In our 3rd episode of this 4-part podcast series, Sasha Shillcutt and I are addressing another big thing that holds women back: our misconceptions around failure and how we can move on from it. We’ll also talk about the limiting factors of internalizing failures without properly reflecting on them.
Follow Sasha @become_brave_enough
Have a question for us? Submit it anonymously here: https://bit.ly/2Pc9LKa
I asked for your questions about the philosophy a week or so ago and got over 100 responses! I'm answering 2 of them today with Alex Dorr, our VP of People Evolution.
"I don't always have 10 minutes to react without emotion. Sometimes I feel like I need 10 hours to respond with grace! However, a response is often needed in 10 seconds. How can I maneuver these 'right now' situations?" - Suzy Kraemer
"How can I coach the highly-engaged but low-accountable employee, especially when there is a group of them?" - Angela Feldkamp Beck
SBAR Tool: http://bit.ly/2InNWFQ
In episode #2 of this 4-part series on limiting beliefs that hold women back, Sasha Shillcut and I are discussing preconceived notions we have of women around us, comparison, competition and stereotypes and the toxic roles they play in our relationships. We’ll cover breaking down the stories we tell ourselves so that we can separate the drama and misery from peace and joy.
Follow Sasha @become_brave_enough
Have a question for us? Submit it anonymously here: https://bit.ly/2Pc9LKa
Alex Dorr (VP of People Evolution and Speaker/Trainer with RBL) and I are riffing on a bunch of great topics around change today that we commonly hear or see on the road. Topics we cover include:
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How to handle change fatigue
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Why we resist change and how to develop resilience
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Why standardization is your friend
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What's yours and what is the organization's when it comes to decisions
Follow Alex @alexmdorr and listen to his podcast, The Carvery: http://bit.ly/alexdorr
Ladies, I'm so excited to share this series with you, posting every Wednesday for the next 4 weeks. Dr. Sasha Shillcut and I are going to be breaking down the most common limiting beliefs that hold women back and ultimately limit our success and happiness. This week we're going to tackle a major thought distortion we all struggle with: All or nothing thinking! We'll also talk about how perfectionism keeps us from doing brave new things.
Follow Sasha @become_brave_enough
Have a question for us? Submit it anonymously here: https://bit.ly/2Pc9LKa
Today I'm talking about a question I get a lot on the road, which is: How can I make somebody else do something? What I find is many organizations are talking a lot about accountability, but when it comes to the day to day, our behaviors, words, and processes enable the exact opposite of what we are wanting to create. In this episode, I share examples of how you can stop enabling others both at home and work. SPECIAL SERIES FOR WOMEN! Tune in on Wednesdays for a series with Dr. Sasha Shillcut on how women sabotage themselves. Follow @become_brave_enough
Meet one of my favorite people: Maren Showkeir, a fellow author, teacher, yogini, and editor of my book, No Ego. She and I are so aligned in our philosophies on life and work - especially when it comes to accountability, ditching the victim mindset, how we cause our own suffering and getting intentional about how we show up at work and in our personal lives.
This conversation will motivate you to tune into your intentions and light a fire under your commitment to practice it daily.
Books:
Yoga Wisdom at Work: https://amzn.to/2kemykJ
Authentic Conversations: https://amzn.to/2kGLmlF
I'd love to hear from you! Leave me a comment and a review!
This week I'm sharing a special pre-recorded interview with Paycom's HR Break Room at the SHRM 2019 Annual Conference. Our topic is how HR can lead cultural change. Some things we discuss are: Why I think HR has traditionally fueled drama, what we can learn from Millennials about pushing for and embracing change, how we can get our teams to embrace new technology, and how we can create a culture that is nimble and ready for what's next.
Loving this podcast? Leave me a review and share your thoughts with me in the comments.
This is a special episode with a great friend of mine in the HR world, Sarah Morgan. I've been following along with her podcast, blog and #BlackBlogsMatter Challenge for a while now and am always impressed with how she is working to evolve HR practitioners and workplaces everywhere. The topic of our conversation today is about a blog she wrote: "What's in an Ally?" where she talks about the 5 things that really make you an ally at work and how to talk about tough issues surrounding diversity and inclusion.
Blog: https://bit.ly/2k25yOG
Book: We Can't Talk About That at Work: https://amzn.to/2kgevnK
Book: Me and White Supremacy: https://amzn.to/2kgeEaM
Follow Sarah @thebuzzonhr
Beth Wonson, a Speaker, Facilitator, Coach, and Author, is my guest this week, whose brain-based research helped her recognize how emotions, stories, thinking errors, and fears impact our ability to create positive work environments. For the past two decades, she’s studied how leaders working in isolation and staff working in competitive silos adversely affect the prosperity and growth of the whole. You'll love her tips for how to navigate challenging dialogue! Learn more about Beth's work at BethWonson.com Follow Beth on IG @Beth_Wonson
My guest this week is Tayo Rockson, a storyteller, cultural translator, and brand strategist for change-makers on a mission to use his difference to make a difference. Our conversation today has me reflecting on how we can make better cross-cultural connections, focus not on our intentions, but our impact, and live with radical self-awareness as we seek to better understand the world around us.
Follow Tayo everywhere on social @tayorockson
Pre-Order Tayo's book coming out Sept 4: Use Your Difference to Make a Difference https://amzn.to/33UPDDJ
This week, I'm chatting with Keith Risinger, HR Director for Leadership Development at Eli Lilly and Company, whom I have known for 5 years and is an excellent practitioner of the RBL philosophy. Keith and I regularly exchange ideas on how we are changing mindsets and building accountable teams on the daily. I think you'll love hearing about his favorite tools to build accountable teams! Want more of my content? Follow me everywhere on social @cywakeman Subscribe to my YouTube channel: YouTube.com/CyWakeman
We've all been in meetings that go astray or are unproductive, and leave us completely frustrated. In today's episode, I'm answering a couple more questions from you about this very topic! I'll be sharing my best tips and tools to make your meetings go smoothly and keep drama out of it, whether you are leading it, or simply a participant.
Think Inside the Box Tool: https://bit.ly/2YyPAgZ
More Free Tools: https://bit.ly/2OeedMg
Loving this podcast? I'd love to hear from you! Leave me a rating and a review!
Kristen Hadeed founded Student Maid in college with zero knowledge about leadership or running a company. Along the way, she has uncovered some pretty awesome truths about how to build teams and workplaces that are engaged and create results. Kristen's company is more than just about cleaning toilets, it's about building the future generation of leaders. Listen in as she talks about authenticity, limiting beliefs and giving herself permission to screw up.
Learn more at kristenhadeed.com
Follow me everywhere @cywakeman
My guest this week is on a quest to create 100 million deep listeners, and he just converted one more in me! Oscar Trimboli, an author and keynote speaker, has some incredibly practical tips for becoming a better listener. You'll also learn about the top myths of listening and the 4 villains of listening. Find out which deep listening crimes you are committing!
Learn more at ListeningMyths.com
Loving this podcast? Leave me a rating and a review!
In my personal life, I discovered 3 questions that literally changed my life. When I used them in the workplace, I realized it had a major impact on reducing suffering and stress on my teams, and increasing productivity, creativity, teamwork, and happiness.
We all have an ego that distorts our view of reality and leads us down the wrong path unless we are aware of it and have the tools to move us into our high selves. These 3 questions are just the tools you need to free you from your ego so you can move on to have impact in this world.
Enjoying this podcast? Please leave me a rating and a review!
On today’s episode, I’m answering some of YOUR questions about how to succeed in spite of changes and stress at work.
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My team gets stressed at work when someone else makes a mistake. How can I reduce their suffering and get them helping, instead of judging?
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We are moving into a new space within the year and there is a lot of turmoil and drama on the team. How can I get them to see the new opportunities instead of the negative?
Have a question you’d like me to answer? Submit it here: https://bit.ly/2Pc9LKa
You're in for a treat with today's guest: Meliessa Ogrodowski, HR pro and Director of Learning and Development at Craft Brew Alliance. She shares a behind-the-scenes look at how she built a learning and talent development culture from the ground up at CBA, using RBL philosophy as the foundation. In doing so, they transformed their hiring process, performance reviews and appraisals, employee survey, and so much more. You'll be blown away by their amazing results!
Learn more about our Train the Trainer Certification program: https://bit.ly/2UPHpMm
Today my guest is Martha Bird, a Business Anthropologist with ADP. She and I are talking all about how we can use the discipline of anthropology to evolve and transform the way we work, our technology and products with curiosity and seeing the world through the lenses of others.
Find Martha on social @anthro_tweeter
Follow me everywhere @cywakeman
Loving this podcast? I'd love your feedback! Please leave me a review and a rating!
This week, Alex Dorr finally pinned me down to talk about feedback in the workplace! He was able to pull out some of my best stories on the subject, which I'm confident will keep you entertained and learning how the ego can easily interfere in these conversations. Many fear giving and receiving feedback, but when it's based in reality - there's nothing to fear. This podcast is great for leaders and individual contributors alike!
Loving this podcast? Leave me a review and a rating! I'd love to hear from you!
Follow me everywhere @cywakeman
Follow Alex Dorr @alexmdorr
This week's guest is Mikey Ellis, a Culture Strategist at Pragmatic Thinking. In our chat, we explore the age-old question of what it takes to build a great work culture, including the leader's responsibility, as well as that of the employee. Mikey and I share a passion for creating workplaces that empower people to do great things together, as well as a love and appreciation for a glass of great wine from time to time!
Follow Mikey on IG @mikey.ellis
Follow me everywhere on social @cywakeman
After a pivotal moment surviving a life-threatening bike accident, Michael decided it would be his last bad day. In his recovery, he made a commitment to stop chasing happiness. Now as a coach, speaker and author, he is on a journey from being a human doer to a human being. This episode will inspire you to look at your life differently and consider making today your last bad day.
Learn more about Michael at MichaelObrienShift.com
Loving this podcast? Please leave me a rating and a review!
This podcast is a call to greatness for leaders who are practicing the philosophy to stay true to a wider concept of keeping an open mind, an open heart and staying curious. It's about how we can fall into overusing one part of the philosophy - calling people to greatness, accountability - and underusing self-compassion and compassion towards others. When this happens, we find ourselves out of balance.
My desire is for you to use this podcast as a self-reflection of how you are evolving yourself first, and then your talent, so you can go out and do great things in this world.
I'd love to hear your thoughts on this episode! Leave a rating and a review!
Follow me everywhere @cywakeman
I love this week's guest, as she takes an evidence-based approach to prepare and engage working moms (aka "LeaderMoms") in the sometimes wonderful, sometimes rocky, professional path. This episode is great for moms and employers alike as we find a way to address real business problems of unwanted turnover and gender equality, while reducing the guilt, anxiety, and fear that comes along with being a LeaderMom.
Learn more at LeaderMom.com
Follow on social @LeaderMomOfficial
If you're loving this podcast, leave me a rating right here. I'd love to know what you think!
Marianne Williamson is at the very top of the list of profound teachers that I want to bring to this podcast, and I am thrilled to have her with me today! A Return to Love is one of my most loved, shared and used books on my bookshelf. Her message is powerful: Apply love to all of your affairs and you can be healed. Read Marianne's books: A Return to Love: https://amzn.to/2w3OnOT A Politics of Love: https://amzn.to/2HpLGhl Learn about Marianne's Presidential campaign: marianne2020.com Follow me everywhere on social @cywakeman
If you've noticed that I've upped my speaking game, let me introduce you to my secret weapon: My speaking coach, Fia Fasbinder with The Moxie Institute! Every leader role comes with it a need for good speaking skills, whether you are in a 1:1, a board meeting or on stage. This podcast is full of techniques you can try out immediately to up your game so that people hear the wonderful content you have to deliver.
Learn more about The Moxie Institute.
Follow me everywhere @cywakeman
The fact is that many of our marriages end, and today's guest, Ashley-Nicole Russell, is a lawyer advocating for a more collaborative approach to work through this grief-filled process. She exposes divorce for what it is: A broken system that is breaking children, families, and employees. Her book, The Cure for Divorce Culture, contains the recipe for a healthy life through divorce. Her innovative approach is changing the divorce culture for generations to come!
Follow Ashley @anrlaw
Buy Ashley-Nicole's book: The Cure for Divorce Culture
Loving this podcast? Leave me a review and share your feedback!
Follow me everywhere @cywakeman
I'm thrilled to bring you a personal favorite of mine: Dr. James R. Doty, M.D. I was first introduced to Dr. Doty through his book, Into the Magic Shop, and have continued to be inspired by the work he is doing as a neurosurgeon, philanthropist, and Director of the Center for Compassion and Altruism Research at Stanford University. You will love his incredible morning routine for setting your intentions for the day.
Follow Dr. Doty on social @jamesrdotymd
Learn more about his work: http://ccare.stanford.edu
Follow me everywhere @cywakeman and leave a review of this podcast if you're loving it!
Steven Matthew Adams, Author, Speaker & Coach, brings us to the corner of Eastern wisdom and Western living, giving us a practical guide for how to find and sustain true happiness. This podcast will give you a glimpse into the wisdom he gathered in his life journey that started with a meditation practice at the age of 15 to a finance career on Wall Street and finally discovering his authentic self and life's work. Follow Steven on social at @stevenmatthewadams Buy Steven's book: https://amzn.to/2UIU2c3 Also, I'm everywhere on social @cywakeman
Kate Northrup, Author and Entrepreneur, shares how by doing less, we can actually have more in our lives. Her new book, Do Less: A Revolutionary Approach to Time and Energy Management for Busy Moms,is the antidote to the 'push harder, hustle more' mentality that is plaguing our culture. Listen in to get practical tips from Kate on how to better manage the energy and time in your life.
Follow Kate on Instagram @katenorthrup
Buy her book: https://katenorthrup.com/book/
Follow me everywhere on social @cywakeman!
In this episode, I want to share an interview I did with Workhuman Radio at this year's conference on why engagement is broken. As leaders, we've gotten way off track in terms of engagement, and we're going about it the wrong way, which is leading to an entitled workforce. Listen in as we discuss how to truly create engagement without all the drama.
Be sure to follow @workhuman on social for how we can work to change the world of HR!
Have a question for me? Submit yours anonymously and I may answer it on an upcoming episode: https://bit.ly/2DEv2Zz
Today, I'm bringing you a very special episode from a private HR C-suite luncheon I led at Workhuman 2019. In it, I reveal the 5 major reasons why you are experiencing drama at work based on my research findings, and how you can work to overcome it.
Please excuse the audio, as there is some interference at times, but it was too good not to share!
Loving the podcast? If you haven't yet, leave a rating and a review whenever you are listening - I'd love to hear your thoughts!
By the way, I'm @cywakeman everywhere. Find me on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and YouTube.
Coined the Eckhart Tolle of the internet, James is one of those guys that will help you in the pursuit of your own evolution. In his book, Sh#t Your Ego Says, he writes about his inner battler between the Ego and the Higher Self. Listen in as he shares his transformation after becoming homeless in the aftermath of Hurricane Sandy.
Follow James McCrae on social @shityouregosays
Are you ready to ditch the drama for 30 days? Join our challenge starting April 1, and get a daily email with a 5-minute task each day for 30 days. Sign up by March 31! https://bit.ly/2F4i1rI
Today's guest, Lauren Zajac, Chief Legal Officer at Workhuman, joined me in Boston on International Women's Day for a special podcast about how to create work-life balance and better navigate the work world as a woman. One great tip that she shares is that you will always be successful if you are fully present with the current experience.
Learn more about Lauren and resources for women at Workhuman: https://bit.ly/2TNEwdG
Can you ditch the drama for 30 days? 5 minutes a day for 30 days. Creating habits for a drama-free life. Starts April 1. Sign up by March 31 to get in! https://bit.ly/2F4i1rI
Given a notice that her company was going to be closing down in 2 years, Joni Wheeler, CEO of CoreLink Administrative Solutions, was challenged to maintain high engagement and retention of her staff in spite of the news. Listen to this incredible story of how she and the team were able to not only survive - but thrive - in these circumstances.
Loving the podcast? If you haven't yet, leave a rating and a review whenever you are listening - I'd love to hear your thoughts and get some feedback!
By the way, I'm @cywakeman everywhere. Find me on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter and YouTube.
Today, Alex Dorr and I discuss a huge trend around consensus-based decision-making. Many leaders focus on getting everyone's input on decisions but are running into challenges. Without accountability, it is creating chaos.
We answer: How can we ensure we are getting the best input from all of our teams with diverse backgrounds and build true organizational alignment without additional drama?
Additional Resources:
The Carvery Podcast with Alex Dorr: https://linktr.ee/alexmdorr
Negative Brainstorming Tool:https://bit.ly/1PfbFS9
You are going to love Sasha Shillcutt, who has become a voice for women on burnout, resiliency and gender equality. Sasha is a cardiac anesthesiologist at the University of Nebraska Medical Center, and founded Brave Enough because, after a successful career climb as a clinical scientist and national expert, she found herself empty & isolated. She will inspire you to be #braveenough in your personal and professional life!
Find more information about Brave Enough at https://www.becomebraveenough.com
Loving this podcast? Please take a moment to give me a rating and review! I'd love to know your thoughts!
You're in for a treat as Kelli Thompson of the RBL team takes over the podcast with her top five life-changing bits of wisdom and transformational questions from the Reality-Based Philosophy. Kelli has worked on the RBL team since 2016, but we first met way back in 2006. Hear her stories and learn how it transformed her work and personal life.
You can find Kelli at @kelraethompson or KelliRaeThompson.com
Have you tuned in to the Life's Messy, Live Happy show yet? This is where I answer YOUR biggest workplace questions. Check it out here: https://www.facebook.com/LifesMessyLiveHappy/
I'd love to introduce you to Adrienne Edgar, who has some great techniques to share with leaders to up their coaching game. Learn how Adrienne came to be a coach and her #1 tip for being successful with individuals and teams. If you're loving this podcast, please take a moment to give me a rating and review! I'd love to know your thoughts! Special Discount for Listeners: Get $300 off your WorkHuman 2019 registration with my special code: WH19CY Register here: https://bit.ly/2RVjJzY
In today's episode, I want to share the new ways I'm starting to come to terms with the meaning of accountability. Our team had an opportunity to deepen our understanding of accountability through a recent training we did with Tim Gallwey and IGEOS. Tune in to hear what insights we brought back.
If you haven't yet, leave a rating and a review whenever you're listening - I'd love to hear your thoughts and get some feedback!
By the way, Season 2 of Life's Messy, Live Happy is going strong! Have you tuned in yet? I'm answering questions from you guys, and would love to hear your questions! Check it out here: facebook.com/lifesmessylivehappy
One of my great teachers and a leader on the science of happiness is joining me today on the podcast. Fred and I talk about choices that lead to happiness, grieving, forgiveness, and venting. He answers the age-old question, is it ever ok to vent?
Here are two great pieces of Fred’s work if you want to dive deeper:
What is forgiveness? https://bit.ly/2MCEizT
The Science of Happiness: https://bit.ly/2G7Ns6B
Have a question for me? Submit yours anonymously and I may answer it on an upcoming video: https://bit.ly/2DEv2Zz
This week's guest is Michael Bungay Stanier, author of several books including The Coaching Habit and Do More Great Work, and CEO of Box of Crayons. Michael is one of my greatest teachers and I invite you to listen in to all the wisdom he has to share!
If you haven't yet, leave a rating and a review whenever you are listening - I'd love to hear your thoughts and get some feedback!
By the way, I'm @cywakeman everywhere. Find me on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter and YouTube.
Do you mentor someone? Are you in a mentoring relationship? If so, have you really thought about what it means to be a mentor? Many times, when we are in a mentoring relationship, we need to take a step back and evaluate - are we moving the needle towards good? And what is the goal of the person looking to be mentored? There are so many ways to mentor and today I want to give a glimpse into how I mentor and why.
By the way, I'm @cywakeman everywhere. Find me on Facebook, Instagram and YouTube.
Are you loving this podcast? If you are, please leave a rating and a review wherever you're listening. Ratings are how other people find the podcast, so they mean everything to us.
My first guest of the new year is the incredible Monica Hawkins! CEO. Founder. Leader in diversity and inclusion. Faculty member at Georgetown. The list goes on and on. I was struck by her brilliance and it was instant love - I'm so excited for you all to meet her on today's episode.
By the way, I'm @cywakeman everywhere. Find me on Facebook, Instagram and YouTube.
Are you loving this podcast? If you are, please leave a rating and a review wherever you're listening. Ratings are how other people find the podcast, so they mean everything to us.
This is the last episode of 2018! Next week, I'll be on a break as I start my New Year off. We'll be back the following week with more episodes.
Thank you so much to everyone who listened, shared with a friend, reached out - anything you did to support me in the year, I appreciate you.
Hope you enjoy my reflections in the episode and I'll see you in the New Year!
What better way to get into the holiday season than with an inspiring chat with the incredible Lisa Bilyeu? Lisa is co-founder of the billion dollar company Quest Nutrition and President of Impact Theory. She works alongside her husband Tom Bilyeu to delivery inspiring content and videos to hundreds of thousands of people a day. What I find most awesome about her is her rich background in adapting to change - she's done it all, and she's succeeded in so many different parts of life. Enjoy our conversation and let me know which part was your favorite! I'm @cywakeman everywhere.
Are you loving this podcast? If you are, please leave a rating and a review wherever you're listening. Ratings are how other people find the podcast, so they mean everything to us.
I almost can't put into words how excited I am to have the incredible Martha Beck on my podcast today. This is someone I look up and have learned so much from, and I'm so happy to have her on today's episode.
We talked about a wide variety of topics, from her theory of fractals in your inner life to integrity within the self. A fascinating conversation. Hope you enjoy.
Please leave a rating and a review wherever you're listening - those ratings mean a lot to us and help other people find the podcast!
For this week's episode, I'm reaching back into the archives for a classic episode from Season 1 on why suffering is optional. If you've been following me for a while, you have often heard me say this. In this episode, I break it down step by step and explain exactly what I mean and how you can live happy even when life is messy.
After you listen let me know what you thought - come find me on Instagram @cywakeman or Twitter @cywakeman.
Please leave a rating and a review wherever you're listening - those ratings mean a lot to us and help other people find the podcast!
This week's guest is the amazing Steve Glaveski - an inspiring founder and CEO, Steve says his life mission is to unlock the latent potential of organizations and people to create more impact for humanity and lead more fulfilling lives. We had a great talk.
If you haven't yet, leave a rating and a review wherever you're listening - I'd love to hear your thoughts and get some feedback!
By the way, Season 2 of Life's Messy, Live Happy is going strong! Have you tuned in yet? I'm answering questions from you guys so I'd love to hear from you. Check it out here: facebook.com/lifesmessylivehappy
On today's episode, I want to look back on Thanksgiving and reflect on some different aspects of it - my own stories, the untold story of the holiday we didn't learn in school and more. One thing for sure: I know I'm looking forward to spending time with family. Hope you enjoy this special episode!
Have you tuned into Season 2 of my Q&A show Life's Messy, Live Happy? I'm answering fan questions - and you can submit one too!
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My guest on today's podcast is a personal friend of mine who I am so thrilled to have on - Sue-Ellen Watts, or Sel as her friends know her, is a leader and changemaker in today's HR world. She is the Founder and CEO at wattsnext, and has offices in both Brisbane and Sydney. Her story and words are inspiring and I can't wait for you guys to tune in!
Have you tuned into Season 2o f my Q&A show Life's Messy, Live Happy? I'm answering fan questions - and you can submit one too!
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Welcome to another episode of No Ego! In keeping with our new format, this week is a solo episode with me. Next week we'll be back with another great guest, so be sure to stay tuned for that. On this episode today, I'm telling you guys "how to start" - where do you begin with the Reality-Based Leadership philosophy and how can you start implementing it?
Have you tuned into Season 2 of my Q&A show Life's Messy, Live Happy? I'm answering fan questions - and you can submit one too!
Check it out here:
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So excited about today's episode, where I chat with Sara Patterson, the VP of HR for Walmart's Digital Consumer Brands like Bonobos and more. She is also the head of talent management. Needless to say, she is an HR veteran with so many great ideas and we had a conversation that I think you guys are really going to enjoy listening in on.
Have you tuned into Season 2o f my Q&A show Life's Messy, Live Happy? I'm answering fan questions - and you can submit one too!
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This podcast is off this week as I prepare for my big talk at TEDx Omaha this Saturday! I can hardly wait and wish you could all be there, but stay tuned for content from it and lots of amazing tidbits.
So instead of a full episode this week, I bring you this bonus from a conversation I had a while back with the amazing Joel Block, a business executive, leader, and professional speaker specializing in finance, sales and beyond. We had a great talk and I thought it would be great to share it here with all of you. Enjoy!
By the way, make sure you tune into Season 2 of my video show, Life's Messy, Live Happy where I'm answering all your questions!
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Happy Monday everyone, and welcome to a brand new episode of No Ego! In today's episode I sit down with the incredible Marie Forleo, entrepreneur, B-School founder, philanthropist, and host of MarieTV. I have been a fan of Marie's for some time now and it was an absolute honor having her on the show. In this episode (a must listen!), we discuss the freedom we can all achieve in today's world, what it takes to get things done, the power of engagement, getting rid of drama in our lives, and so much more!
By the way, make sure you tune into Season 2 of my video show, Life's Messy, Live Happy where I'm answering all your questions!
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Happy Monday everyone, and welcome to a brand new episode of No Ego! In today's episode, I want to spend some time pulling out and deconstructing some topics my guest Tim Gallwey and I discussed last week on the podcast. My goal here is to, coming out of that conversation, put things together in a way that allows you to act on the advice and make changes in your own life right away.
By the way, last week I launched Season 2 of my show Life's Messy, Live Happy where I'm answering your questions! Check it out here:
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In this week's episode, I sit down with the extraordinary Tim Gallwey. Tim is an author who has written books on a methodology he invented called The Inner Game. He is a pioneer in his field and has worked with team and companies on overcoming and battling stress. He is truly a legendary thought leader and I am honored to have him as a guest on No Ego.
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Thank you for your patience as I got this week's episode ready! I wanted it to be perfect and I'm so excited to share it with you.
In this episode, I tackle Me Too. Compassion, understanding, and open dialogue are called for in this "me too, what’s next" time in our work lives. How do we move into a relationship with each other, while also evolving and growing? I share a few tips I have on this topic in this episode today.
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So excited about today's episode with the incredible Scott Halford. Scott is a writer and long-time professional speaker and educator of businesspeople worldwide. He focuses on brain-based behavioral science, emotional intelligence, critical thinking, and influence. His clients include GE, Bank of America, American Airlines, Medtronic, Western Union, and several more of the most venerable businesses in the world.
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As you might notice by now, this new season of No Ego is special in that every other episode is a guest, while the episodes in between are me solo. This new format is meant to showcase all the different angles and philosophies of Reality-Based Leadership, but also bring fresh topics and perspectives from people in my network.
Today's episode is going to get into the nitty-gritty of buy-in: why it isn't optional, what it truly means to be bought in, and how you can best introduce the concept into your workplace and worldplace.
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Hello No Ego listeners, today's podcast is a very special one. I'm so thrilled to bring on the amazing Mastin Kipp as a guest. Mastin is an entrepreneur, best-selling author, and renowned public
speaker. He is the creator of Functional Life Coaching™, an innovative, unique and accelerated approach to creating lasting personal and business change.
Mastin is also recognized by coaching industry contemporaries and some amazing people you may have heard of like Oprah Winfrey, Tony Robbins, Arianna Huffington, and Caroline Myss. I hope you enjoy our conversation. Thank you so much for tuning in.
Welcome to episode 2 of the brand new season of No Ego! As we move forward in the season, you'll notice that every other episode has a guest, and in between, you get me solo. So welcome to a solo episode, your "one on one with Cy" for the week.
Today we're going to talk about bringing your whole self to work. While I totally understand where this concept is coming from, it has a lot of flaws in it. I advocate for your evolved self, not your whole self. For more on that, tune in to today's episode.
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The official launch of Season 2 is here! Thank you all so much for tuning in and I can't wait to share this incredible upcoming season with you.
For this episode, my guest is Steve Pemberton, the CHRO of Globoforce, who's on a mission to inspire HR leaders to embrace more humanity and foster a sense of purpose in the workplace.
A quick message for all of you about Season 2 of the No Ego podcast and what you can expect from it. We're going to move from the philosophy we explored in Season 1 into how you can actually make it happen. I'll be interviewing changemakers who have championed and made evolution a reality in their workplace and worldplace. Upcoming guests include Sara Patterson of Bonobos, Steve Pemberton of Globoforce, Marie Forleo, Mastin Kipp, and so many more.
Season 2 launches 8/20 so be sure to tune in. I'lll see you guys there.
Welcome to the last episode of Season 1 of the No Ego podcast! What's next, you might be wondering - well, stay tuned for a special announcement next week. Season 2 is going to be amazing and I can't wait to share it all with you.
For today's final episode of Season 1, I'm bringing you a conversation with the amazing Randy Harrington, PHD. He is CEO, owner of Extreme Arts & Sciences and co-founder, owner
of Strategic Arts & Sciences and Best Practices Media. We talked about so much, from millennials in the workplace to accountability to where drama comes from.
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This week I'm excited to have Peter Barron Stark of The Peter Barron Stark Company as my guest. Peter and company are recognized as nationwide leaders for executive, employee and workplace excellence, that over the past 25 years, has surveyed and trained a quarter of a million managers and employees across a broad range of industries. Love chatting with Peter about all things workplace optimization as it pertains to executive development, employee engagement, and creating a workplace that gets people excited to come to each day. This is definitely one you don't want to miss so make sure to tune in for more!
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This week I'm excited to have Kevin Eikenberry on as my guest. Kevin is is a recognized world expert on leadership development and learning and has twice been named by Inc.com as one of the top 100 Leadership Speakers and Leadership/Management Experts in the world. We tackled a subject I don't get to bring up enough - working remotely. These days teams can be working from so many different places, but that doesn't they don't face the same challenges. How can leaders update their methods and also keep drama at bay when they aren't in the same room as their team? Tune in for more!
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You guys are in for a treat with this week's episode - I'm so proud to have on Linda Galindo, whose work I have been following for years. She is a thought leader in accountability and I adore her work. Linda believes people on a whole are afraid of accountability - but she wants to change that, first by showing us that it is a mindset, not a set of behaviors. Tune in for more of our fantastic conversation.
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Today's episode comes to you from...the NASA headquarters! I was lucky enough to head down to Washington, DC to speak with Billy McMillan, the Human Innovation Officer at NASA. When we think about NASA, we typically think about scientists, engineers...but you don't often think of the other roles that play such a huge part in creating the discoveries that are made today. It was such a thrill to talk to Billy about some of the amazing things he is working on and how our philosophies intersect.
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This week on the podcast, I'm bringing you guys the full unedited conversation with my good friend Kris Lappala from Dell Technologies. I had him on my show Life's Messy Live Happy last week, but we edited the conversation down. The only place you can get the full thing is right here on the podcast. We honed in the big topic I've been talking so much about: excuses. How can you as a leader get your team to stop relying on excuses? And are leaders imagining so much of the work they think they have to? We thought so. Tune in for more!
Keep leaving those reviews for this podcast! Reviews go such a long way on iTunes and they mean a lot to me!
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When you meet up with team members in a project and acknowledge together that where you're going is unknown, everyone is able to put their ego aside and get into a beginner's mind. Nothing is impossible when everyone is learning together. This is one of the topics that kicked off my conversation with the amazing Matt Johnson, a lead consultant at The Frontier Project, an organizational transformation company. He's a trained mathematician, former frontman of a punk rock band, and a Pentagon policymaker. There’s no fitting Matt into any sort of box. I hope you'll enjoy our conversation as much as I did.
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You guys are going to adore today's episode. My guest is the incredible Vernice FlyGirl. She is a keynote speaker, a motivational speaker, and a business coach. She's also a former United States Marine Corps officer who was the first African-American female naval aviator in the Marine Corps and the first African American female combat pilot in the U.S. Armed Forces. Basically, she is incredible. We had a great conversation in Dallas ahead of our keynotes at Evanta and we had a blast. Can't wait for you guys to listen in.
Also, quick note for you guys - for whatever reason, reviews go such a long way on iTunes and they mean a lot to me! If you love this podcast and have a moment to leave one, please do! I love reading them and they help a lot.
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This week I'm bringing you a treat: two episodes of the No Ego podcast! Please join me for my first ever bonus episode - I sat down with Alex and Kelli, two of the amazing speakers from Reality-Based Leadership, to talk about what to do when you're not consulted. People automatically assume that when they're asked to work on something, they will be consulted. We break down why that's not the case and why they should give the gift of their work anyway.
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Excuses are your ego's main output. It's the summary of what your ego sees of the world. The "why we can't" or "why we shouldn't have to." As a leader, how can you respond to not the excuse itself, but the person behind it? How do you move people beyond ego? I thought we'd sit down just you and me today and talk about just that.
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It was so exciting and fun to bring the amazing Wendy Sachs onto my podcast. She's a producer at CNN, an author, and a TED speaker. We talked about so much, from "engineering serendipity", to networking, to being a woman in today's world. Wendy even gave me a sneak preview into some upcoming projects she has. I can't wait for you to hear it all.
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This is a very special edition of No Ego because in this episode, I brought on Cathy Frost, my very best friend. She's known me for years so our conversation was just amazing. We talked about Mother's Day, our moms and all lessons we learned from each other. Cathy is a life coach specializing in helping people live beautiful, soul-filled lives while living with metastatic breast cancer.
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I am so excited about today's new episode. I got to sit down with two powerhouse women in the world of company culture and human resources: Grace Killelea and Claude Silver. Both women are changing the world of HR, single handedly leading us into a revolution to update how we think about culture. We had an amazing conversation and I can't wait for you all to listen in.
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On today's episode, I'm so excited to bring on Shelley Zalis. Shelley is an internationally-renowned thought leader for advancing equality in the workplace. As the first female chief executive ranked in the research industry’s top 25, she changed the game, helped elevate feminine values in the workplace and has devoted herself to becoming a mentor and role model to women and leaders in her industry. Our conversation was incredible and I'm so excited for you guys to listen in.
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So excited to bring Ryan Warner on the show today. I was recently on his podcast and loved the conversation - so I wanted to bring him on. We talked about what happens when the ego comes out to play, how putting up our defenses immediately can often be the first act of war. Tune in for more.
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Today on the podcast, I'm honored to bring on my good friend Sarah Morgan as we discuss the ins and outs of coming into an organization fresh. What do you do when you come into a leadership position above a group of people who for so long haven't been managed and don't want to be? Sarah told me the story of one of her first instances of using reality-based leadership in a workplace.
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When I hear people talk about trust in the workplace, I get concerned because we make it sound like something we can create for another. But that leaves us dependent on other people, and creates situations where people end up waiting to be offered something. When you say there is a lack of trust in your organization, is it due to leadership or due to your own choices? That's what I want to get into today. Whether or not you trust someone has a lot to do with you.
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When you are blaming others for your circumstances and not taking control of your own actions, that is when your ego really comes out swinging. And I want to get into today one of the major factors of blame, something I like to call learned helplessness. Learned helplessness is the opposite of accountability, and personal accountability is the death of the ego. And we all know that when you ditch your ego, it allows for growth and collaboration. Tune in for more.
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Very excited to bring you real concrete actionable advice in the episode on unhooking from your ego and letting it go. You may have wondered how you can recognize when you're in your ego, how you can address it and stop it when it's actually happening. There are many ways to go about that and I'm here to share them with you.
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In today's episode I want to talk about conflict. As a researcher, I've spent so many hours dissecting and trying to understand conflict and why it happens. What I've found is this: so much of the time, the root cause of conflict is ambiguity. And a leader's job is to facilitate clarifying conversations. Listen in for more on this and what else I've discovered are the best ways to fix it.
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Today I'm releasing the full, uncut conversation with Jon and Rae Shanahan from Businessolver. I love sitting down with clients and discussing how reality-based leadership has affected them and their company because we really get into the nitty gritty of exactly how these methods work and why. Tune in for the raw conversation and tweet me with questions! I'm @cywakeman.
In today's episode, I got the chance to chat with the amazing Mark LeBusque. We got to talk about how you can change your frame of mind for the better, how you can keep your ego from stopping you. Mark is a great example of someone who took their ego head on and conquered it, and I love his story. The big takeaway? Look in the mirror way more. Listen for what I mean by that.
Today I am so excited to introduce Joe Topinka to my podcast. He is the founder of CIO Mentor and CIO at SnapAV. Like me, he is an advocate for big change in the workplace. His philosophies align closely with mine and his ideas are invaluable to me. He also brings a fresh new perspective from the technology side of things. Listen in for more.
A couple months ago, Jonathan Solórzano-Hamilton, a software architect at UCLA, wrote a Medium article called "We fired our top talent. Best decision we ever made." It's no surprise it took off - to many people, that makes no sense at all. But it struck a chord with me. I know that no matter how high performing someone is, if they are high drama, they can't stay. I got to chat with Jonathan last week and this is the result our amazing conversation. Enjoy!
In today's episode, I talk about why you should live your life with great expectancy instead of expectations. There's a big difference, so I want you to dive into it with me and see how drastically different it can make your day to day.
Accountability: it's a topic I bring up a lot because I believe it is one of the most misunderstood words in today's workplace. How do you measure for it? What is the end goal? And how do you introduce it to your company? I sat down with Jackie Froendt from Home Instead Senior Care to talk about all these things and so much more. Sidenote: we were meeting to film my new Facebook Watch show, Life's Messy Live Happy! Check out my Facebook to tune in to that as well.
With the holidays approaching, and the added stress that can come with them, I thought I'd focus on one big topic of mine today: that suffering is completely optional. I don't say this to be insensitive or trite - it's just that so much of our suffering comes from stories we make up in our own head and not reality. In today's episode, I'll show you tools you can use to fix that and be stress free this holiday season.
This week, I'm taking you through the steps and actions that go into defusing drama and how you can do it in your own workplace or worldplace. It can feel daunting approaching drama, but through thoughtful questions and a few other tips I have for you, you'll be well on your way.
Would you believe it if I told you that recent surveys suggest 90% of workers are ‘disengaged from their work?’ My friend, and guest on the podcast this week, Robb Holman, started with this alarming statistic, and has used it to inform his philosophies at Inside Out Leadership. Join us as we discuss the inherent problems facing today's leaders, and our ideas on how we can fix them.
In this week's episode, I answer the often asked question, “How do I make someone change?” with a surprising answer. You can’t make anyone do anything - but, you can stop enabling them. When you stop enabling your teammates, it 's the quickest way to ensure that their relationship with reality is a direct one and that they have the best information possible with which to make better decisions.
I got wind of a fan of who was starting their own reality-based leadership revolution at their company so I surprised them with a phone call. We managed to capture the conversation and get great tips on how to start from where you are, even if it's not a company sanctioned program.
On this episode, I'm so excited to introduce you all to Ricardo Palomares, and international keynote speaker and author and one of the most inspiring people I have ever met. He's been faced with seemingly insurmountable hardship in his life but has always prevailed. I often speak about how true freedom is having nothing to lose. It's the perfect recipe for no ego moments. We broke down some of his standout stories from his life.
In this episode, the last of the exclusive book club calls, I talk about why I believe our approach to change management has been one of the biggest fuels of drama in the workplace. We are asking ourselves, how can change be least disruptive to our team? But what we should be asking is: how can we make change least disruptive to our business? By making sure our teams are always ready for what's next.
Another great episode for you guys today - last month I hosted a number of informal, exclusive, member only chats for everyone in my book club. Excited to share the second one with you all now, just for my podcast listeners! Listen in.
How do you build a company that values people over everything else? That is what Claude, Chief Heart Officer of VaynerMedia, is aiming to do. She is the heart of the 800 person advertising agency based in New York City, keeping a pulse on every single person. Our philosophies overlap so much, it was amazing to sit down with her and discuss ditching the drama and dropping the ego.
You know those times when you get into an awesome conversation and then later you wish you had recorded it? Well, this time, I lucked out. I captured my entire conversation with Brent Phillips, president and CEO of Regional Health, a health system that serves the Black Hills of South Dakota. You get the opportunity to listen in - it was an amazing chat.
Excited to be introducing you all to another guest today, Craig Ross. His new book, "Do Big Things", aligns so well with my philosophy around how leaders don't manage people, they manage energy. It's a leader's job to facilitate movement away from "why we can't" to "how we could". Tune in to today's episode for more!
In today's episode, I'm so excited to have my first guest ever join me in conversation. Tina Hallis is an author and professional speaker. Her philosophy "The Positive Edge" will help you see things in a positive light and reduce stress in your day to day.
In this episode, I'm switching things up a bit! Recently I had an exclusive call with all the members of my No Ego Book Club where I talked for a bit and answered questions. But the content was so good, I am now releasing it here for all of you to hear as well! Enjoy.
For this episode today, I want to go a little bit deeper into how exactly you can get your team to understand what great looks like quickly. How can you say to your team with confidence "Go be great"? Tune in for more!
In episode 5, I tell a story from my time as a leader in the healthcare system working with nurses. A nurse came to me and asked to speak with me and I knew venting was coming, thus I used one of my favorite techniques for self-reflection and getting people back on track: I called her up to greatness. If there's one question I ask people to get them out of ego and into self-reflection, it's this.
In today's podcast, I talk about one of the core philosophies of my reality-based leadership: stop judging, start helping. It's integral for an organization to understand this to function without drama. Tune in and see how you can apply it to your workplace.
This episode today is about what I believe to be my greatest idea, the discovery that I feel is my biggest contribution to society. That idea is this: happiness isn't something we pursue, it's our natural state once drama is gone. Listen to this episode for the full story.
Today, I want to talk about a concept called "Co-Creation". Most of us don't know we have the access to it and how important of a resource it can be in our day to day life.
Your ego narrates the world in your favor. This means you're always getting a distorted interpretation of reality. Learn how to get mentally flexible and stop believing everything you think.
Cy welcomes you to No Ego, where we teach you how to ditch the drama, end entitlement, and drive big results in your workplace and your worldplace.