Accidentally Derivative: Recent Episodes
Marcus Vowell
Jason and Marcus talking about the various aspects of the human condition, living near the Disney parks, owning homes, these kids today, movies, music, and many other topics. It's a meandering hodgepodge of non-sequitur nonsense, and honestly, probably isn't worth paying attention to. Usually drops on Tuesday afternoons. Usually.
In the show's final episode, recorded live in front of a virtual audience, the guys talk about flying with interesting people, a strange man in the neighborhood, Jason plays some Sneaky Sasquatch, and they answer some questions about the show. Thank you so much for listening!
The guys discuss senioritis, ponder a missing word from a bumper sticker, raise a metaphorical glass to the memory of magnetic tape, and Marcus shares his intense distaste for a particular 1990's science fiction movie.
The guys discuss book "lyrics", appliance woes of many kinds, the affliction that is "swamp waist", board games, Jason discovers Affresh, and Marcus rants about Spotify's ineffective shuffling abilities.
The guys ponder the requirements for a "syndrome," discuss wet shoes and cleaning up people you've spilled Diet Coke on, and discover some of the intricacies of etiquette in the Japanese onsen.
The guys start the show singing Thompson Twins, and it devolves from there into discussion about burning Jawas, the epic saga of Jonathan and Logan, and pondering the life cycle of butterflies.
Jason tells of an incident involving a "flat" turtle, the guys discuss automated cars, Ze Frank's Earth Sandwich, the Japanese word for "rabbit," and different aspects of sleeping.
Jason shares the concern his sleep monitoring software is showing for him, the pair discuss hotel headboards, RV dealerships, and postal awkwardness. Jason then recounts the trouble he once had with a government toilet. The guys also do a Ps and Qs.
Jason and Marcus discuss the woes of timing the ordering of replacement toiletries and the demise of the Dash Button, and Jason unveils "Plan 50," his project to establish numerous new habits before he turns 50. Also, Jason has multiple technical difficulties with his audio.
Jason and Marcus remember Pepperidge Farm, talk about cookies both real and virtual, discuss many of the woes of air travel, compare travel backpack contents, and introduce a new listener-supported segment to the show: Accidentally Derivative Ps and Qs.
Jason brings back from his trip to the west coast a tale of a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad Monday.
Jason talks about all of the drama that occurred when he left his hair salon and went around the corner to his optometrist, he and Marcus discuss their distaste for the Hard Sell™ in both eyeglasses vendors and car dealerships, marvel at Carvana's car vending machine, Jason talks about Rollerblade Dude, and they both discuss the Nuchal Ligament without knowing that's what it's called.
Jason and Marcus take questions from the audience and tell stories about whiskey blending, tequila tasting, shooting safety videos, Impressions de France, and jelly.
Jason and Marcus tackle the topic of alien ghosts, various aspects of dreaming as humans and as dogs, overly loud live music in restaurants, leaving the tails on shrimp, and we get an update on Jason's sous salonist issues.
Jason and Marcus discuss the interesting phenomenon of Committee Face and context-based attractiveness, Marcus shares his admiration for "Mad" Jack Churchill, and Jason tells the epic tale of the DMV Crack.
The pair appreciate Lionel Ritchie, discuss the otherworldly NotMilk, Jason tells the tale of the rock-work guy next door, and the pair share their feelings and frustrations on the subject of belligerent sidewalk merging.
The exciting continuation of Jason's Tale of the Deluge and the pair discover the ins and outs of peanut butter management.
Jason and Marcus discuss the different meanings of the word "quite," we get an update on what's been going on with the Pregnancy Pillow lately, and Jason tells the first part of the Tale of the Deluge.
Jason and Marcus discuss the ins and outs of coffee mug design, the sanctity of morning solitude, and the enormous pressure of their solemn duty to save the world.
Jason and Marcus discuss being dorky disappointments to both fathers and sons, Marcus shares breaking news of a cake fire, the pair discuss dropping stuff, sweetening drinks, and revisit cereals.
Jason and Marcus discuss lightbulbs, Marcus tells the tale of the "shower outage," the pair take on 880s sitcoms, regional restrictions, the rules of the baggage claim, and we find out just why Jason knows all the words to Copa Cabana.
We're ON LOCATION! Jason and Marcus discuss the many weird intricacies of the cruise industry while hanging out on beautiful Castaway Cay.
Jason and Marcus ponder an Iron Maiden symphony, what is "true cinnamon", managing your weight data integrity, and breakdown the hidden meanings in "The Rainbow Connection"
Jason and Marcus discuss subscribe buttons (hint hint), starting projects after 9:30 PM, trying to find that sweet spot where you lose your video game at the same moment the episode of the show you're binging on Netflix ends so you can get some sleep.
Jason talks about making tea, Marcus talks about making Asgardian armor, and Jason has an epic journey through his dentist's office.
Jason and Marcus talk 3D Printing, carpet and furniture, a lot of stuff about toilets, and then touch on some recent movies they've watched.
Home improvement frustrations, zip ties, twist ties, Ziploc bags, jellyfish, and the odd items one finds in their Buy It Again list.
Jason and Marcus discuss their holidays, going to movie theaters, the various shampoos one encounters, and Jason tells a story of intrigue, betrayal, new relationships, and how best to tip French people, all in a single story about a trip to his barber.
Some of out favorite bits from the show along with some fan favorites. Have a wonderful holiday season and we'll see you next year!
Jason and Marcus discuss haircuts and trimming one's eyebrows, Jason tells a tale of Elvis (not THAT Elvis), the pair ponder the possible vocation of funeral photographer, and Jason and Marcus plot out a crowdsourcing guerilla operation to silence a percussive menace in the Disney Parks.
Jason and Marcus lament smart notifications, Jason floats a theory that his AirPods may be stalking him, they discuss the social contract as regards ordering food, and ponder just how crucial the sense of smell is.
Jason and Marcus discuss the joy of new Post-Its, misheard words and lyrics, Jason confesses to accidental snailicide, they try to solve what the adult version of "girlfriend" is, Jason has a run-in with a medical brochure in the men's room, and we have an update on The Ted Situation™
Jason and Marcus discuss their upcoming excursion to Takumi-Tei, classic television shows, screening calls in the future, being naked in one's kitchen, and Marcus describes a developing situation with a weird neighbor which Jason somehow makes weirder.
Marcus recounts his photography and trivia woes, Jason recalls his perfect Frasier moment, they discuss food machinery and a possible business opportunity, and how ironing is hindering the advancement of the human race.
Jason and Marcus discuss creepy dolls and even creepier children, the plot holes in the Thriller video, Jason's fear of the automotively encountered plastic bag, and Marcus's smoke detector mystery arrives at a conclusion.
Jason worries about being replaced by Cousin Oliver, he and Marcus discuss the nuances of personal identity, the "hold the bus" conundrum, Marcus gives an update on the smoke alarm situation, and Jason gives an update on his ear canal. All before taking on the complicated social issue of the decorative towel.
Jason and Marcus discuss mowers and landscaping, including the exciting conclusion of the Zero-Turn Confrontation, gene editing, the existential dread of childhood, Jason's faulty ear canal, and an interesting gum that boasts its own enduring unpleasantness.
Jason and Marcus talk about how they apparently can't complain, discuss belts and suitcase wheels, Jason tells the tale of his very weird flight, they develop the Show Recommendation Release Form, and Jason has a brush with death from a would-be horror movie antagonist on his lanai.
Jason (in his 8-bit form) and Marcus discuss Bryan Adams, the Walt Disney World 50th Anniversary celebration, Jason's forehead's encounter with a chair, some nerd stuff, and Jason tells the tale of "chasing the lizard," which isn't as dirty as it sounds.
Jason and Marcus discuss Episodic Amnesia, rental cars, and vacation playlists. Jason gives a sleep report as well as in update on the Colorado Casual Wedding and Marcus rants about an electrical outlet. This one is kind of all over the place.
Jason and Marcus discuss crying at movies, commenting on unfamiliar weather, writing checks, and signing cards. Jason also relays the tales of the Lost Dog & the Wrong Guy, Russ, and The Notary.
Jason and Marcus talk about the worrisome distinction of "chocolatey chips," concerts at Epcot, all of the recent changes at WDW, Jason talks about his encounter with a leaky monorail and also his upcoming blood work appointment, and how, when you have to hold still, that's the only time you find that you can't.
Jason regales Marcus with his wonderful interactions with the DMV and his son's driving test, they discuss jury duty and the Scientific Method's extensive resume, one beloved WDW buffet style restaurant has returned with Covid-conscious changes, and Marcus has opinions about actors' contracts, to the surprise of literally no one.
Jason and Marcus discuss a recent hiking trip Marcus went on, talk about the stress one encounters in the public bathroom stall, appropriate wedding attire, and the joys of both hotel laundry service and flying kites.
Jason and Marcus ponder a trip to the inspiration of the Overlook Hotel from The Shining, get into a short discussion about comic book movies, discuss the value of creativity in a bottom-line oriented world, and Jason laments the inner turmoil he feels concerning the neighborhood lemonade stand, and their lack of payment options.
Jason and Marcus discuss varieties of chocolates and nuts, have various chopstick-related beefs, and remember a classic Tim Burton movie. Warning: Contains Small Star Wars Rant.
Jason and Marcus discuss the Sleep Number bed, the necessity of an occasional need for a Check for Death, desk chairs, more Roomba drama, eating better. Also, to hopefully help him sleep, Jason has purchased... something.
Jason and Marcus discuss more of Jason's interactions with his neighbors, Zoom etiquette, The Banana Incident, athletic shorts management, and how to adequately and safely declare that one is not "the guy."
In Jason and Marcus's first live show, they talk about Jason's encounter with a very conspiracy-minded phlebotomist, the strange shortage of cocktail menus, and ask the question, "Just how clean is your belt?"
Jason and Marcus ponder the distinction of practice vs. performance, prepping for a hurricane, how mesmerizing train videos can be, wet wiping, and the taste of Betamax. Show Notes: RailCowgirl's YouTube channel (https://www.youtube.com/user/HinduCowGirl) Jason's eye bra (https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00FJQFJX8?ref=ppx_pop_mob_ap_share) Little Rock's Cinema 150 (http://cinematreasures.org/theaters/1060) Toto Bidet Toilet Seats (https://www.amazon.com/s?k=toto+bidet&ref=nb_sb_noss_1)
Jason and Marcus discuss the linear nature of time, cool movie credits, authors reading their own books, the perils of the unexpected sex scene in movies watched on airplanes, and the plague of people listening to music on speakers in public. Show notes: Creativity, Inc. by Ed Catmull (https://www.amazon.com/Creativity-Inc-audiobook/dp/B00IPJTQQW/ref=sr_1_2?dchild=1&keywords=creativity%2C+inc.&qid=1625574710&sr=8-2) Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams (https://www.amazon.com/Hitchhikers-Guide-Galaxy/dp/B0009JKV9W/ref=sr_1_3?dchild=1&keywords=Douglas+Adams&qid=1625574858&s=audible&sr=1-3) Greenlights by Matthew McConaughey (https://www.amazon.com/Greenlights/dp/B08HLW2JXD/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=greenlights&qid=1625574908&s=audible&sr=1-1) Rock Me Amadeus by Falco (Salieri Mix) (https://open.spotify.com/track/25bpNQ8AV2BMvWEIpjEOWo)
Jason and Marcus discuss dishwasher and microwave safe-ness, the possibility that the universe is a simulation, and the horrors of unwashed basil.
Jason and Marcus discuss haircuts and movie theaters, Marcus talks about an unusual task related to a project he's working on, and Jason laments the various eccentricities of his hair and how, unsurprisingly, he has to take every new barber or not-stylist through an orientation before they cut his hair the first time.
Jason gives a smoke alarm update, and he and Marcus discuss furnace filters, backup singers, the mystery of Kiss From a Rose, and the wild world of stuntpeople.
Jason and Marcus discuss the philosophies regarding dishwasher dish arrangement and laundry machine settings and share smoke alarm related horror stories. But, you know, it's more interesting than that. Promise.
Jason and Marcus discuss second puberty, the myriad citrus sodas of the world, what happens when food that is way too hot goes into your mouth, further dentistry hang-ups, and complications of slow-close toilet seats.
Jason and Marcus discuss the Dallas/Dynasty Cinematic Universe, the nuances of music and lyric writing, going maskless in WDW, the post-apocalyptic world of Charlie Brown, yelling in your sleep, and develop yet another product that will doubtless become a major success. Show note: The Tommy Westphall St. Elsewhere Universe (https://youtu.be/VCeZbrvvDmc)
Jason and Marcus discuss the farmer's tan, procrastinating hanging a television, the satisfaction one gets from peeling the plastic off of electronics, expensive junk mail, screwing future you, and a personal tragedy of Jason's that is indirectly related to noted science guy, Bill Nye.
Marcus tells the tale of Francesco the Magic Cabbie, Jason tells the tale of the Chilean Scavenger Hunt, they discuss pop music over time, Jason stalks the people from Impressions de France, and we finally find ourselves up to our eyeballs in Roombas. Show notes: Impressions de France (https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0084124/?ref_=fn_al_tt_1)
Jason and Marcus discuss tea, who's a jerk on Lost, the sublime beauty of the affogato, bringing the Cobb salad back to the menu, the secret of Al Capone's vault, and the perilous game called "Poop or Bark." Show notes: The Mystery of Al Capone's Vaults (https://youtu.be/pgx7--A_NCU) The Cobb Salad (https://www.allrecipes.com/recipe/14415/cobb-salad/) Affogato (https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Affogato)
Jason and Marcus discuss neighbor interactions, verbal punctuation, jobs that probably suck, history-based psychological trauma, the interdimensional nature of Peter Falk, and Jason regales us all with the Ballad of Rob. Show note: Greenlights by Matthew McConaughey (https://www.amazon.com/Greenlights/dp/B08HLW2JXD/)
Jason and Marcus commiserate about back pain, discuss living with pets, dog-greeting protocol, fishing strange waters, motion sickness, and store clerks that, for some reason, want to help you.
Jason and Marcus discuss how to take someone looking at their Apple Watch, the joys of being left out of the mass text, unsolicited rings at the doorbell, and a sinister Ponzi scheme aimed at our nation's youths. Show notes: Johnny T's NYC Tourist Tips (https://vimeo.com/313571020)
Jason and Marcus discuss Coke-induced sugar crashes, Jason's application for Parent of the Year, tea, salads, Welsh Rarebit sauce, and ponder "The Letter." There is also a Starch Madness update. Show notes: The Ultimate Coca-Cola Experience (https://disneyworld.disney.go.com/dining/disney-springs/coca-cola-rooftop-beverage-bar/) Impressions de France (https://disneyworld.disney.go.com/attractions/epcot/impressions-de-france/) Twining's Comfort Tea (https://twiningsusa.com/collections/herbal-teas/products/comfort) Line of Duty TV Series (https://www.imdb.com/title/tt2303687/) The Thick of It TV Series (https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0459159/)
Jason and Marcus discuss the social ramifications of inexpertly expectorating, weird neighbors in Mr. Canapp's Neighborhood, and even weirder conversations on the Ring doorbell-centric social network.
Jason and Marcus discuss how one reacts to many people asking about your well-being all at once, the subtle application of powders to one's person, podcasts one listens to, the many issues one encounters when dealing with a telescope and/or the moon, and the allure of solitude and how other people screw that up.
Jason and Marcus discuss how too much knowledge and/or too much thinking can turn you into an incompetent idiot. Very deep. Also, Jason showcases a particular source of irritation that could cause your opinion of him to shift one way or the other, depending on your own disposition.
Jason and Marcus discuss subscription car washes, musicals, using English versions of other cultures' place names, the insecurity of journeyman knowledge, revisit the metric vs. imperial debate, and learn to fly, though not really.
Jason and Marcus talk more about aging problems, push notifications to tell you everything is okay, ATM designs, putting your bare feet out of the car window, and all of the quandaries associated with interacting with other people in the wild.
Jason and Marcus share the difficulties of living with an electronic roommate, the ambiguity of the "tornado watch," moral implications of cruelty to Minecraft chickens, and the social conundrum of being able to customize someone's contact photo.
Jason and Marcus discuss The Clapper, commiserate on mortgage and insurance hikes, bemoan various streaming television service limitations, gripe about annual pass issues, and generally complain about everything. Also, Jason makes a heartfelt confession. Two, actually, if you want to get technical about it.
This episode's topics: Mandalorian finale, Star Wars timelines, what Episode 7 should have been Some times, your humble narrators get off on a particularly nerdy tangent and go way over time on the Accidentally Derivative Podcast. So much so, that we've mercifully removed it and made it into it's own series. These are sporadically released, only on the occasions when they go, well, Down the Doughnut Hole.
Jason and Marcus discuss an awkward and puzzling incident they had at a Disney Springs restaurant, fasting, martinis, unexpected poop, the gravity of the phrase "it could be vomit," and just what the heck Luke was doing while Lando was trying to get a job at Jabba's palace.
Marcus and Jason discuss composting, cleaning the refrigerator, a completely separate podcast, food around WDW, and counting one's blessings. (Yes, Jason sounds weird in this one)
Jason and Marcus settle down for a meal at Three Bridges Bar & Grill at Disney's Coronado Springs resort and discuss childhood trips to Disney, heavy Christmas ornaments, and delicious food.
This episode's topics: Soul, Two and a Half Men, Star Wars, Time Travel Some times, your humble narrators get off on a particularly nerdy tangent and go way over time on the Accidentally Derivative Podcast. So much so, that we've mercifully removed it and made it into it's own series. These are sporadically released, only on the occasions when they go, well, Down the Doughnut Hole.
Jason and Marcus explore Jason's aspirational frumpy pipe-centric aesthetic, Marcus recalls his grandfather gleefully mentioning (at an inopportune moment) the ability to use dental floss as a murder weapon, and both of your humble narrators finally tackle that important question: Does Accidentally Derivative have it's own signature smell?
Jason and Marcus discuss language-related pet peeves and going to the dentist. Plus, they can't seem to get off of the whole toy thing. So, sorry about that.
Jason and Marcus explore Christmas movies and take a trip down memory lane discussing the best toys they ever got for Christmas. It's not as sappy and schmaltzy as it sounds.
After some follow-up on Jason's decaying lifeform problem, Marcus and Jason explore the Star Wars Holiday Special, criticize various Christmas songs, and delve deeply into the life and work of one Jerome K Jerome, the funniest essayist to ever come out of 19th century Staffordshire.
Marcus recalls his recent camping excursion and Jason recalls his alternate life as the reluctantly dog-owning sasquatch executive of a major company.
Jason and Marcus bask in the glow of Jason's new studio furniture, discuss various pens, the pursuit of meteorology, foreign radio shows of the past, we get an update on both Sidewalk Guy and Grass Guy, a fire alarm goes off, and bodily fluids, both human and animal, are discussed more than most folks generally care for.
Jason and Marcus discuss the various things you can get away with now due to the Covid excuse, people who already know the thing, the multicultural wonder that is SnackCrate, and the originalist's nightmare of "Greatest Hits" and compilation albums.
Jason and Marcus discuss term papers, hacking, and the monumental complications and pitfalls of ordering food at the drive-thru or even at the counter.
Jason and Marcus wax cartographic in this episode full of travel, luggage, cruising, motorcycling, and Love Boating. They also examine the horrific chimera that is "Biscuit Tea."
Jason and Marcus discuss time zones, ethical delimmas presented by bottled water and candy bars, contractors and landscaping, and awkward questions posed by in-laws.
Jason and Marcus discuss the upcoming Halloween holiday, trick or treaters, guys that call you, ghosts, smells, scary movies, and Jason recounts an incident involving a certain chaotic sidewalk regular mentioned in episodes past.
Jason and Marcus discuss the horrors of the Hour of the Wolf, their app-delivered genetic ancestry, zen gardens, mice and hamsters, and the sisyphean task of keeping a bonsai tree alive.
Jason and Marcus discuss the rules governing screen credits, the horror of raisins and Greek cookies, what "bruising the vermouth" means, weird foods, Jason's Danish ancestry, and the social nightmare that is tableside guac.
Jason and Marcus ponder the paralysis of choice, the glory of original Tivo, targeted advertising, and the clear superhuman abilities of a certain cruise ship bartender.
Jason and Marcus ponder elves, narwhals, eating alone, and using robot babies to get better airplane seating.
Jason and Marcus continue the discussion of rollercoasters, send Jason's son off to college, reminisce over the old school internet, and ask the question: "Do you husker du?"
Jason and Marcus remember ping pong balls, chalk, crayons, and chocolate. And also contemplate all of the many horrific ways to die on a rollercoaster.
Jason and Marcus compare scars from past cereal-based injuries, contemplate parallel evolution, and receive elocution lessons from Michael Caine, more or less.
Jason and Marcus contemplate just what ruined Facebook, sidewalk etiquette, meditation, and free food you get after factory tours.
Jason and Marcus discuss Ahmed Best, the lyrical poetry of the band Survivor, misheard lyrics, surviving the apocalypse, and the beginnings of a single elimination showdown to crown the King of Snacks once and for all.
Jason and Marcus ponder how one's mustard preference is a measure of one's personality, investigate a paradox that undoubtedly involves time travel, and relive childhood traumas involving balloons that would give a first grader the thousand yard stare.
Jason and Marcus discuss working out in the time of COVID, the various insect-related movies, the generationally-dependent appeal of Gene Hackman, and beating or being beaten by the CAPTCHA
Jason has discovered a suspiciously large hole in his yard, and he and Marcus ponder what could be in there. Is it possums? Eternia, the home of He-Man? The Ron Jon surf shop?
Jason and Marcus discuss karaoke, stage fright, ask the question "Can discarded furniture be 'stolen'?", and ponder the virtues of the Sith
Jason and Marcus revamp WDW's fastpass system, discuss the best way to break into the Animal Kingdom to queue up for Flight of Passage early, and reminisce over the best concerts they never attended.
In the inaugural episode, Jason and Marcus solve Disney World's COVID mask sizing problems, order bespoke shirts, and wish social distancing would become the norm even in times of no pandemic.