“I think of a hero as someone who understands the degree of responsibility that comes with his [or her] freedom.” - Bob Dylan I’ve been thinking about freedom today for a number of reasons – it was just Independence Day in the US, I recently visited my 101-year-old grandmother who still lives independently, and I had a two-week road trip with my family while still coaching the members of FLOW365.

I want to share what I thought freedom was, what I have come to learn it to be – and how I practice making choices on a daily basis to experience freedom. 

For a long time, I thought freedom meant buying whatever I wanted, doing what I wanted when I wanted, and eating everything in sight. Sometimes it felt good, but more often than not my desires were based on other people’s agendas. I needed to reconsider freedom.

I started paying really close attention to all the people in my life over the past few years — guests I interview here, coaches I have hired, colleagues I respect, my grandmother, Oprah, Brene Brown — I am so curious how each person finds their version of freedom. 

I want to pass on some of my biggest lessons about freedom today. I don’t have all the answers. I come from many years of bad habits and limiting beliefs, so these are all things I experiment with and practice on a daily basis.

Freedom is saying no to foods and substances that don’t serve me. Who knew? I get asked all the time if I feel left out at parties when a cake comes out in its full dairy and gluten glory. (For those of you who are new to my world, I have chosen not to eat those things.) The truth is that it may have been hard at first, but 10 years in, I choose the energy, good-health, and waistline that come with eating what I know serves me. I never knew in my 20s that I had the freedom and choice to feel well all the time. 

My latest “no” has been to alcohol. A few months ago, I realized that even though I was not consuming that much alcohol, I would grab a glass of wine at the end of the day so I could feel fun in a moment when I was feeling exhausted. I realized that I had stripped myself of the freedom to be fun or admit I needed to go to bed. This change has not been easy — trips, weddings, holidays all draw me towards wine bottles, but it has been a really important experiment in finding “my fun.” And I have to say, a mere 90 days in, it feels so freeing knowing that I can be fun all on my own.

Freedom is deciding, making a plan and sticking to it. Not everyone gets this point because it seems counter-intuitive. Eating junk food every day is not freedom, because though it is fine today (after a little tummy ache maybe), it may catch up with you later. 

The same is true about exercise, sleep, and water. If any of these things aren’t optimal for a day, it’s not a huge deal. But put that on repeat and you have a problem. After too little sleep for a week, a month, 3 months, you will not have your best ideas and you are more likely to get the cold your kid brings home. On the other side, FLOW365ers continually report the freedom they experience from meal planning – the time saved, the worry averted, the kids who eat more variety than ever, how easy the kitchen becomes.

Planning does not mean you are rigid and never do anything on a whim. It means you have set great boundaries, so you know when to say yes and no, and when you say yes to something out of the ordinary it feels great. When I don’t plan, there are many yeses that feel bad. I think it is the uncertainty of really knowing whether I have the time and space to do that thing and live into my ideal life at the same time. If I slip into not planning or not following through with my plans, I turn into martyr mom. I carefully planned my last trip with my family down to New Orleans. I included time to spend with my grandmother, time to spend with family and friends, time to visit our favorite eating spots. My grandmother...