In this episode, Dr. Shaw uses an example of communication among adults to illustrate a successful strategy for communication with children. Her train of thought begins with an example of two adults communicating in which one or both of the adults might become defensive during a conversation. Her suggestion for the adults is to not be defensive but to be accommodating in terms of solving the mis-communication. She then turns that into a model for children which leads to a discussion about when to accommodate and when to have no room for negotiation with a child.  It comes down to clarity and respect within the adult-child communication, and once again, it's best to hear her description of these effective strategies, and you can do so in this episode.