Topic: How do I talk to someone I love who is struggling with their mental health?

Intro: Changing stigma towards mental health

Step 1 - changing our beliefs

Step 2 - changing our actions related to beliefs

2019 APA survey:

https://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/2019/05/mental-health-survey

1. What is my relationship with this person? (4:30)

2. Relationship = vulnerability + boundaries

3. Where are they at? Consider the person’s willingness to have the conversation
4. Can they see the concerns or are they mostly unaware?
5. Use the phrase – “I’ve noticed” or “Have you noticed…”
6. Start with culturally normative symptoms or what might be easiest from them to hear

7. Shift our own understanding about mental health as part of everyone’s everyday life

8. Get some info for yourself

9. Nami - https://nami.org/Support-Education

10. and Mental Health First Aid and Fresh Hope groups
11. recognize our own anxieties about mental health
12. Mental Health First Aid: https://www.mentalhealthfirstaid.org/take-a-course/find-a-course/
13. Determining a crisis v. non-crisis situation

QPR training for suicide prevention:

https://qprinstitute.com/individual-training

• Concerns about suicide: https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/

• Consider your language and your relationship with your own mental health (18:00)

• Do not make assumptions

• Ask lots of questions
• Use a tone of respect
• People are more responsive when we are willing to deal with our own stuff
• Be authentic in our own struggles

• The struggle isn’t usually the same intensity forever

• Have some resources ready and check back in (23:30)

• Hotline resources - https://www.rainn.org/

https://www.crisistextline.org/text-us/

https://www.thehotline.org/ for family and relationship violence

211 – basic resources local to you

• look up some local therapists

therapist search on Heidi’s website: https://heidigoehmann.com/connect

• Combat veteran resources and info around trauma

Normalizing combat trauma - https://www.ptsd.va.gov/understand/common/common_veterans.asp

Find an EMDR therapist - https://www.emdria.org/find-an-emdr-therapist/

Get your own therapy if they are resistant (or if they aren’t)

• books –

Maybe You Should Talk to Someone - https://amzn.to/3EXYkhV

Maybe You Should Talk to Someone Workbook - https://amzn.to/3HPMpEL

Soul of Shame - https://amzn.to/3pViWTK

Daring Greatly - https://amzn.to/3zwOpPw

Fresh Hope Workbook - https://amzn.to/3faK0YV

Fresh Hope website - https://freshhope.us/

Loving Someone Series –

PTSD - https://amzn.to/34oRh5s

Bipolar - https://amzn.to/3zsYEnK

ADHD - https://amzn.to/3mYkmuY

1. Don’t forget boundaries for yourself with compassion

Mental health page at heidigoehmann.com - https://heidigoehmann.com/mental-health-1

Relationship page at heidigoehmann.com - https://heidigoehmann.com/relationships

Short Answer: There is no perfect way to have the conversation - start somewhere, with a resource and a single awkward conversation.