You didn't know it, but there's a big problem with using a bidet . . . namely that no one knows how to use one! Leave it to the Japanese people to save you from this problem, though.

In other news #hackZuke may be starting up (thanks, Zohner), Mozilla has decided that it is now a company that has "something to do with the internet", and the National Highway Association has deemed Tesla's autopilot safer than a human. Just not ALL humans.

Headlines:

#hackZuke is coming! Apple just works! So does 20 year old malware on Apple! iPhones just work! Unless you send some emoji to them! Mozilla: Some Kind Of Internet Company Twitter sells division it couldn't use to Google (who CAN use it?) Verizon decides to go full on stupid with Note 7 users Galaxy S7 Nougat rollout is halted in China Samsung may not have courage after all: S8 to keep headphone jack In Communist China, Pokemon Catch You! NHTSAS deems Tesla's autopilot not to blame; actually pretty awesome FINALLY! These bidet controls will make some sense! "And I for one would like to welcome our new Russian overlords."

Zuke’s Favorite: Giant Cooking Robots?

Zohner’s Favorite: Logan