Evan and I talk about our experiences as it relates to being emotionally activated (triggered).
We discuss the following:
Triggering explained
Personal ways that Evan and I are triggered
Why certain feelings show up and what to do when you're experiencing an emotional flashback
What to do when you're actively triggered
How to make forward progress
Breaking the stigma of shame around triggers
Ways to ground yourself when feeling out of control
Self compassion is key in your recovery journey
I think of triggering as experiencing an emotional flashback. Consider if I am emotionally flashing back to childhood in the present day and I think/feel that I am not safe. That would be a very understandable response if you note that during my developmental years my parents didn’t help me regulate my emotions. No one helped me understand what I was feeling from day to day or why. There wasn't a conversation about emotions. It's very reasonable that a child would feel unsafe.
I go on to share a recent experience that triggered me and also revealed my forward progress. It’s exciting and motivating to recognize where we used to be compared to where we are today. It creates hope that more healing is coming!
The body remembers past experiences and we have a physical response because of it. I respond to my inner child when she feels unsafe and out of control. I am learning to integrate more fully into my body. I give examples of how I speak to my child self. As you recover you’ll be affected without the same response, but be gentle with yourself along the way. Being triggered isn’t the issue, it simply reveals there is underlying pain.
Self parenting or reparenting is very healing. It’s imperative to be surrounded by love and support. Feeling isolated and alone is a set up for anxiety, depression and despair. Safe loving touch that’s comfortable to you can help too. A hug can go a long way! Seek support that you trust as you process your triggers.
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