Close Quarter Dad: Recent Episodes
Close Quarter Dad
The Close Quarter Dad podcast is a discussion among men about teaching our kids to live safe, confident and resilient lives. Topics are focussed on topics of personal protection, family safety, loss prevention and last resort survival.
... Before it Spots Your Kids.
In this recording from the Child Safety Summit, 2022 we sit down with the authority on Situational Awareness, fellow Dad and author of some of the most comprehensive and valuable books on keeping your family safe.
In this episode you will learn:
- How children can identify and understand normal environmental behaviors.
- How children can spot abnormal behaviors within their given environment.
- How to give children a plan and a means of avoidance or escape should a dangerous situation present itself.
Whether you're a parent, relative, or work in the childcare industry, the things you impart upon children will have a lasting impact on the way they live their lives.
Nowhere is this more important than in the area of personal safety. As caregivers, we have a great responsibility for the security and wellbeing of our children, and to guide them along the path to independence.
CONNECT WITH GARY QUESENBERRY
WEBSITE: https://www.garyquesenberry.com/
FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/quesenberrytraining/
INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/gary.quesenberry/
ABOUT GARY
Gary Quesenberry served in the United States Army where as an Artilleryman during Operation Desert Storm. He later became a career Federal Air Marshal and instructor where he devoted his life to studying the areas of violence and predatory behavior.
Now Gary works as a personal defense trainer and has developed numerous basic and advanced level training courses focused on mental toughness, marksmanship, and defensive tactics.
Gary is also the author of the “Heads Up” series of books, Spotting Danger Before it Spots You, Build situational awareness to stay safe, and Spotting Danger Before it Spots Your Kids, Teaching situational awareness to keep children safe.
He has an extensive background in domestic and foreign counter-terror training and has worked in both the private and corporate sectors to help educate others on the importance of situational awareness, and personal safety.
START TRAINING YOUR KIDS NOW
Here’s a complimentary lesson I made for channel listeners on the 3 Discussions you must have with your kids about safety and survival. It’s only ten minutes long, but could be a life saving 10 minutes of your time spent.
CloseQuarterDad.com/3Discussions
CONNECT AND LEARN MORE
WEBSITE: https://closequarterdad.com
INSTAGRAM: https://instagram.com/closequarterdad
FACEBOOK: https://Facebook.com/closequarterdad
What can you do to support this channel?
- Subscribe, every new listener counts to us
- Engage, we are a community who supports each other
- Leave a review, let us know what you think
- Share, know others who may get some value - then share our channel
This is our second episode with Self Defense expert Randy King, during his session of the Child Safety Summit, 2022..
You will join a critical conversation with Randy King and Adam Mitchell about how to step into training personal protection and family safety with a holistic and realistic mindset, versus one of fantasy or competition - but reality.
You will learn:
- The four categories of martial arts
- Defining Whole Circle Training
- What to focus on when teaching kids safety
- Looking through the lens of Self Defense
- Where reality based systems fail
CONNECT WITH RANDY KING
80.20 Website: Randy King Live
Facebook @Conflictmanagementstrategies
Instagram: @RandyKingLive
RANDY'S BIO
Randy King is known internationally for his work in self-defense and personal development training. He began his career as a local influencer, but quickly realized that he wanted to do more. Randy partnered with other international coaches and organizations to bring his message to a broader audience - showing that self defense is not just for the young and fit.
Randy is highly sought-after as an educator and consultant in the area of conflict management and violence prevention. His clients and colleagues appreciate his insight, practicality, and dedication. Randy has a unique ability to make complex topics easy to understand, while maintaining a focus on the practical applications of the material. He is known for his personable demeanor, making him an excellent choice for training individuals or organizations.
START TRAINING YOUR KIDS NOW
Here’s a complimentary lesson I made for channel listeners on the 3 Discussions you must have with your kids about safety and survival. It’s only ten minutes long, but could be a life saving 10 minutes of your time spent.
CloseQuarterDad.com/3Discussions
CONNECT AND LEARN MORE
WEBSITE: https://closequarterdad.com
INSTAGRAM: https://instagram.com/closequarterdad
FACEBOOK: https://Facebook.com/closequarterdad
What can you do to support this channel?
- Subscribe, every new listener counts to us
- Engage, we are a community who supports each other
- Leave a review, let us know what you think
- Share, know others who may get some value - then share our channel
Learn how to shift your mindset to a teacher of Self Defense, when training your children how to protect themselves and remain strong in the face of danger.
Avi Nardia (Major, IDF Res.) served as an official hand-to-hand instructor and safety officer. He then served in Israel's Special Counter Terror Unit (YAMAM) as its official defensive tactics/CQB instructor and intelligence team member.
He also served at the Israeli Operational Police Academy as an official instructor of defensive tactics and operational behavior. In 24 years of reserve service to the Israeli Defense Forces (IDF), he earned the rank of Major. He has also trained Police agencies and armed forces all over the world, from Police patrol and corrections officers to SWAT, SRT and SERT team members along with Army, Marine and counter terror units and Special Forces. He is one of a handful of instructors to have been an official instructor for the Israeli army, Israeli Police, and Israeli counter terror units.
Website: AviNardia.com
START TRAINING YOUR KIDS NOW
Here’s a complimentary lesson I made for channel listeners on the 3 Discussions you must have with your kids about safety and survival. It’s only ten minutes long, but could be a life saving 10 minutes of your time spent.
CloseQuarterDad.com/3Discussions
CLOSE QUARTER DAD: CONNECT AND LEARN MORE
WEBSITE: https://closequarterdad.com
INSTAGRAM: https://instagram.com/closequarterdad
FACEBOOK: https://Facebook.com/closequarterdad
What can you do to support this channel?
- Subscribe, every new listener counts to us
- Engage, we are a community who supports each other
- Leave a review, let us know what you think
- Share, know others who may get some value - then share our channel
Coach Tony Blauer has been in the martial art, self-defense, defensive tactics, and combatives industry for over four decades.
He is one of the only Combatives experts who has successfully affected training across all the combat related communities: self-defense, combat sports, and the military & law enforcement sector.
His research on physiology and mindset as it relates to confrontation management has influenced over three decades of reality-based martial artists and enhanced the survivability of law enforcement, military, and emergency services personnel around the world.
He founded Blauer Tactical Systems (BTS) in 1985 and it has grown into one of the world's leading consulting companies specializing in the research and development of performance psychology, personal safety, and close quarter tactics & scenario-based training for law enforcement, military, and professional self-defense instructors.
CONNECT WITH COACH TONY
https://www.coachblauer.com/
https://blauerspear.com/
https://www.knowfearnow.com/
INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/tonyblauer/
TWITTER: https://twitter.com/tonyblauer
START TRAINING YOUR KIDS NOW
Here’s a complimentary lesson I made for channel listeners on the 3 Discussions you must have with your kids about safety and survival. It’s only ten minutes long, but could be a life saving 10 minutes of your time spent.
CloseQuarterDad.com/3Discussions
CLOSE QUARTER DAD: CONNECT AND LEARN MORE
WEBSITE: https://closequarterdad.com
INSTAGRAM: https://instagram.com/closequarterdad
FACEBOOK: https://Facebook.com/closequarterdad
What can you do to support this channel?
- Subscribe, every new listener counts to us
- Engage, we are a community who supports each other
- Leave a review, let us know what you think
- Share, know others who may get some value - then share our channel
If you're a parent of a 10-16 year old, how would you respond to a grown man has pleasuring himself in front of your son or daughter, and there wasn't a damn thing you could do about it?
That's question I could think of after recording this episode.
There's an extremely high chance that this has already happened to your child, or far, far worse ... and like me, you have no clue. Do not be the parent who responds with, 'not my kid'.
I said the same thing, and I was wrong.
Stop reading right now, and go ask your kid if they've ever heard of the site Omegle.
If they respond 'yes' - they have been present to highly explicit acts, live and in person. They have been victimized, imprinted.
It's time to start having conversations.
In this episode, myself and Eric Carricato, Sergeant with the NYPD and Dad, step into Omegle and ask the people there if this site is safe for children.
What we discover very quick, is a harsh reality that almost no parents are even aware of.
Their children have been hurt, and they have no clue.
Watch the video at: https://closequarterdad.com/is-omegle-safe-for-kids
PLEASE NOTE: Due to the nature of the content, the recording quality changes frequently.
START TRAINING YOUR KIDS NOW
Here’s a complimentary lesson I made for channel listeners on the 3 Discussions you must have with your kids about safety and survival. It’s only ten minutes long, but could be a life saving 10 minutes of your time spent.
CloseQuarterDad.com/3Discussions
CONNECT AND LEARN MORE
WEBSITE: https://closequarterdad.com
INSTAGRAM: https://instagram.com/closequarterdad
FACEBOOK: https://Facebook.com/closequarterdad
What can you do to support this channel?
- Subscribe, every new listener counts to us
- Engage, we are a community who supports each other
- Leave a review, let us know what you think
- Share, know others who may get some value - then share our channel
This is a mandatory episode for all parents to hear, and to share with other parents. Human trafficking, child sexual trafficking and sexploitation is an American epidemic. It is a situation in every town and city. Confronting it should be a line item in every city budget.
In this episode you will learn:
- What human trafficking truly means and the misconceptions we all have
- The truth under the dark blanket about human trafficking in your neighborhood
- How traffickers work and groom their victims
- Understanding the limited government response to human trafficking, and why
- What YOU must do in your community, today
- How to recognize the patterns in a trafficked child
- ... so much more
When you are finished with this episode, you will need to share it with other parents, it's that important - You simply can't look away.
WHO IS NIC MCKINLEY?
Nic McKinley started his career as a United States Air Force Pararescueman (PJ), where he served for ten years before working as a consultant for fortune ten companies.
The Central Intelligence Agency then recruited Nic as a Special Agent responsible for executing full-spectrum intelligence operations in high threat areas.
At both the USAF and the CIA, Nic became aware of the atrocities that humans are capable of and the inadequate to nonexistent methods to eradicate the problem.
As a result, Nic left the CIA and founded DeliverFund and VERAFĪ, directly responding to the escalation of human trafficking and fraud. DeliverFund is the first counter-human trafficking nonprofit to combat modern-day slavery through proprietary technology applications.
VERAFĪ is a private intelligence and due diligence firm focused on helping clients make confident decisions about key hires and investments.
Nic attended Harvard University and holds several patents and trademarks across multiple industries.
Resources:
https://DeliverFund.org
Know The Signs of Human Trafficking
Hunting The Huntress Part 1
Hunting The Huntress Part 2
Hunting The Huntress Part 3
Join The Fight
CONNET WITH DELIVERFUND ON SOCIAL
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DeliverFund
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/deliverfund
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCibINA4SNRv_NeSqNuiR1Lg
START TRAINING YOUR KIDS NOW
Here’s a complimentary lesson I made for channel listeners on the 3 Discussions you must have with your kids about safety and survival. It’s only ten minutes long, but could be a life saving 10 minutes of your time spent.
CloseQuarterDad.com/3Discussions
CONNECT AND LEARN MORE
WEBSITE: https://closequarterdad.com
INSTAGRAM: https://instagram.com/closequarterdad
FACEBOOK: https://Facebook.com/closequarterdad
What can you do to support this channel?
- Subscribe, every new listener counts to us
- Engage, we are a community who supports each other
- Leave a review, let us know what you think
- Share, know others who may get some value - then share our channel
One of the most critical topics to teach our children in terms of safety, regardless if it's staying safe from people or environmental dangers - is posture. It's also a topic seldom discussed in relationship to staying safe.
In this episode, join myself and Chris Janke, author and host of the Health in the Real World podcast, as we go deep into why teaching your children to have good posture will keep them situationally aware and why, and help them to develop into strong, confident adults.
ABOUT CHRIS JANKE
Chris Janke is the host of Health in the Real World podcast. As a seasoned personal trainer of 16 years, he has a lot to offer.
He has been a trainer since 2004, and has helped hundreds of people achieve their fitness goals in a way that's safe and sustainable.
He is also a health and fitness writer of varied books about how to improve your life. view his books.
He is a single father of 4, all under 10 years old. He knows what it's like to juggle life's challenges, while still staying committed to his personal health and wellness.
CONNECT WITH CHRIS:
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/chrjanke/
Email: chris@mycorebalance.com
START TRAINING YOUR KIDS NOW
Here’s a complimentary lesson I made for channel listeners on the 3 Discussions you must have with your kids about safety and survival. It’s only ten minutes long, but could be a life saving 10 minutes of your time spent.
CloseQuarterDad.com/3Discussions
CONNECT AND LEARN MORE
WEBSITE: https://closequarterdad.com
INSTAGRAM: https://instagram.com/closequarterdad
FACEBOOK: https://Facebook.com/closequarterdad
What can you do to support this channel?
- Subscribe, every new listener counts to us
- Engage, we are a community who supports each other
- Leave a review, let us know what you think
- Share, know others who may get some value - then share our channel
In this episode, you will learn my personal key takeaways after spending three days with 14 of the best authors, trainers and advocates for child safety, at the Child Safety Summit, 2022.
While the summit is over, you can still access the speaker's sessions at https://closequarterdad.com/summit-2022
What you will learn in this episode:
- The two constant topics each speaker talked about.
- The most important ideas to consider when teaching your children.
- How to step in to play like a tracker.
- The vital role of bridging communication.
START TRAINING YOUR KIDS NOW
Here’s a complimentary lesson I made for channel listeners on the 3 Discussions you must have with your kids about safety and survival. It’s only ten minutes long, but could be a life saving 10 minutes of your time spent.
CloseQuarterDad.com/3Discussions
CONNECT AND LEARN MORE
WEBSITE: https://closequarterdad.com
INSTAGRAM: https://instagram.com/closequarterdad
FACEBOOK: https://Facebook.com/closequarterdad
What can you do to support this channel?
- Subscribe, every new listener counts to us
- Engage, we are a community who supports each other
- Leave a review, let us know what you think
- Share, know others who may get some value - then share our channel
This episode is for Dads who want to really understand why martial arts are not self defense. Indeed, they support one another, but it's critical that you understand the difference.
You will step into a conversation with Randy King and Adam Mitchell about the differences between and the two, the benefits they both have and how a parent should think when choosing a martial art their child will commit to.
You will learn:
- The four categories of martial arts
- How everything must be defined by goals
- What to look for in a martial art
- Looking through the lens of Self Defense
- Where reality based systems fail
CONNECT WITH RANDY KING
80.20 Website: Randy King Live
Facebook @Conflictmanagementstrategies
Instagram: @RandyKingLive
RANDY'S BIO
Randy King is known internationally for his work in self-defense and personal development training. He began his career as a local influencer, but quickly realized that he wanted to do more. Randy partnered with other international coaches and organizations to bring his message to a broader audience - showing that self defense is not just for the young and fit.
Randy is highly sought-after as an educator and consultant in the area of conflict management and violence prevention. His clients and colleagues appreciate his insight, practicality, and dedication. Randy has a unique ability to make complex topics easy to understand, while maintaining a focus on the practical applications of the material. He is known for his personable demeanor, making him an excellent choice for training individuals or organizations.
START TRAINING YOUR KIDS NOW
Here’s a complimentary lesson I made for channel listeners on the 3 Discussions you must have with your kids about safety and survival. It’s only ten minutes long, but could be a life saving 10 minutes of your time spent.
CloseQuarterDad.com/3Discussions
CONNECT AND LEARN MORE
WEBSITE: https://closequarterdad.com
INSTAGRAM: https://instagram.com/closequarterdad
FACEBOOK: https://Facebook.com/closequarterdad
What can you do to support this channel?
- Subscribe, every new listener counts to us
- Engage, we are a community who supports each other
- Leave a review, let us know what you think
- Share, know others who may get some value - then share our channel
Bag failures suck. Especially when there's kid's food, diapers and important lunches on long trips. Gear failures create stress, can damage stuff around you, and generally ruin what should otherwise be enjoyable, quality family time.
And who's to blame? Probably, you.
Showing up to events with whatever cheap shoulder bag you've been told to carry, that has some cartoon character on it - sort of takes away from who you really are.
You'll joke about it, say it's not really important ... But it is.
If this topic wasn't important, Napoleon Hill would not have included it in all of his works and courses; how your mindset will be strongly influenced by your dress, and how you show up.
Join this discussion about how gear like backpacks and lunch bags can literally change the way a man feels when showing up in life, how things can be made easier and a happier and a more connected family in moments, can be the result.
Founder of High Speed Daddy, Craig Risoli is our guest on this episode.
CONNECT WITH CRAIG & HSD
HSD Website: High Speed Daddy Gear
HSD Community Group Provide Protect Connect Group
Facebook @HighSpeedDaddy
Instagram: @HighSpeedDaddy
CRAIG'S BIO
Craig and his team produce high quality, high speed, dad gear. But Craig's company is not just about products, HighSpeedDaddy created a community where dads can share ideas, get advice, and even pickup a new workout.
From blogs to a private Facebook group, HighSpeedDaddy is a total lifestyle brand who's goal is to help every man excel at being a dad.
START TRAINING YOUR KIDS NOW
Here’s a complimentary lesson I made for channel listeners on the 3 Discussions you must have with your kids about safety and survival. It’s only ten minutes long, but could be a life saving 10 minutes of your time spent.
CloseQuarterDad.com/3Discussions
CONNECT AND LEARN MORE
WEBSITE: https://closequarterdad.com
INSTAGRAM: https://instagram.com/closequarterdad
FACEBOOK: https://Facebook.com/closequarterdad
What can you do to support this channel?
- Subscribe, every new listener counts to us
- Engage, we are a community who supports each other
- Leave a review, let us know what you think
- Share, know others who may get some value - then share our channel
What are you doing to keep children in schools safe? How are you showing up for your community to protect and be an active player in the protection of children?
Or, are you sitting on the sidelines, hoping your tax dollars cover their safety, meanwhile point fingers at who's to blame for the deaths of innocent little ones.
If you're reading this, you are concerned and want to take a step up to controlling the safety of our youngest and most innocent.
This episode, I share my own personal feelings, and what we as men can do to keep our children safe.
START HERE - GET EDUCATED
SIGN UP FOR THE CHILD SAFETY SUMMIT, 2022
https://closequarterdad.com/summit-2022
START TRAINING YOUR KIDS NOW
Here’s a complimentary lesson I made for channel listeners on the 3 Discussions you must have with your kids about safety and survival. It’s only ten minutes long, but could be a life saving 10 minutes of your time spent.
CloseQuarterDad.com/3Discussions
CONNECT AND LEARN MORE
WEBSITE: https://closequarterdad.com
INSTAGRAM: https://instagram.com/closequarterdad
FACEBOOK: https://Facebook.com/closequarterdad
What can you do to support this channel?
- Subscribe, every new listener counts to us
- Engage, we are a community who supports each other
- Leave a review, let us know what you think
- Share, know others who may get some value - then share our channel
I found it in a local community Facebook page, a parent sharing an article they'd found about a girl not pulling over for an unmarked police car.
They soon found out that the person trying to pull her over was a wanted rapist. It created a big buzz in my community, but something about the article didn't sit right with me ...
What you're going to learn in this episode:
- How to teach your kids to respond when they are pulled over
- What to do if an unmarked police car tries to pull them over
- How to teach your kids what police are thinking, and why that's important
- Remember, you're fight will be in court, not with the police officer
- Why you have to show ID
... Upon researching it, I discovered that it had been making it's way around the internet for a few years. Nothing new.
However, the very real problem of that article is that it's a confusing topic, and one that parent's should not take lightly and just tell their kids to do something that they themselves are uncertain of.
So, in this episode we sit down with Sergeant Eric Carricato, (NYPD) and he goes through the shared letter and offers step by step advice on precisely what to tell your kids and how to coach them to have the best possible outcome when getting pulled over by a police officer.
This one episode could not only save your family thousands of dollars from fines, insurance increases and time lost, but can also help you teach your kids how police think and what they are looking for.
START TRAINING YOUR KIDS NOW
Here’s a complimentary lesson I made for channel listeners on the 3 Discussions you must have with your kids about safety and survival. It’s only ten minutes long, but could be a life saving 10 minutes of your time spent.
CloseQuarterDad.com/3Discussions
CONNECT AND LEARN MORE
WEBSITE: https://closequarterdad.com
INSTAGRAM: https://instagram.com/closequarterdad
FACEBOOK: https://Facebook.com/closequarterdad
What can you do to support this channel?
- Subscribe, every new listener counts to us
- Engage, we are a community who supports each other
- Leave a review, let us know what you think
- Share, know others who may get some value - then share our channel
One of the many challenges we as parents face is projecting our expectations onto our children, and assuming they are going to know what these expectations mean. It's actually kind of nuts, and in this conversation we unravel the root of all upset your children encounter, and why.
Ben Winter is the author of What to Expect When Having Expectations, using the anger of unmet expectations to find peace.
In this episode you will learn about:
- Living a life of Improv.
- How to find out where bad feelings are coming from.
- How to use unmet expectations.
- Redefining how you enter into conversation with your kids and having a new found sense of expectation.
- Defining clearer expectations for greater outcomes together
- Why you have to be willing to follow through with consequences.
CONNECT WITH BEN WINTER
Ben's Website: What to expect when Having Expectations
The Book What To Expect when having Expectations
Facebook @BenWinterAuthor
BEN'S BIO
Ben certainly hasn’t been idle in life. A couple of years out of college and he started doing things and going places he never would have expected. From traveling to personal growth to marriage and child to divorce and parenthood to entrepreneurialism and inspiring others. Ben has flown an airplane on his own and has been scuba diving in the Galapagos. He has seen the animals of Tanzania and has traveled all over Europe with a 6-month-old child in tow. He has performed improv for over a decade, acted in several plays, and even a movie. He has owned several businesses.
His biggest passion is exploring the mind. In all of his personal growth work, the one constant was that it all stems from the mind. Between personal growth and improv, he found this weird realm called expectations. And while most people would shy away from such a thing, he decided to tackle it head-on. Along his journey, he decided that “the only reason anyone gets upset is because an expectation hasn’t been met.” And begin teaching that in his Success Improv business.
START TRAINING YOUR KIDS NOW
Here’s a complimentary lesson I made for channel listeners on the 3 Discussions you must have with your kids about safety and survival. It’s only ten minutes long, but could be a life saving 10 minutes of your time spent.
CloseQuarterDad.com/3Discussions
CONNECT AND LEARN MORE
WEBSITE: https://closequarterdad.com
INSTAGRAM: https://instagram.com/closequarterdad
FACEBOOK: https://Facebook.com/closequarterdad
What can you do to support this channel?
- Subscribe, every new listener counts to us
- Engage, we are a community who supports each other
- Leave a review, let us know what you think
- Share, know others who may get some value - then share our channel
In this episode we are joined by my friend Luke Hohmann, who is the founder of an incredible company called FirstRoot, who's technology allows young people to invest real money, in real proposals ... and it has created incredible outcomes.
Luke's FirstRoot model sets kids up for learning financial literacy through participatory budgeting, core life skills, civics and design thinking.
When we think of safety for our children, how often do we consider how prepared they are for financial well-being and security? Well, FirstRoot is an amazing step in that direction; learn how you can get involved.
In this episode you will learn about:
- Participatory budgeting in schools and at home, for kids.
- Steps to building strong financial literacy for your kids.
- The role of civics in financial literacy , and what it means for kids.
- How Luke is going to put $1B in the hands of kids to manage.
- How you and your schools can get involved with FirstRoot.
CONNECT WITH LUKE HOHMANN
FirstRoot Website: FirstRoot
Instagram @firstrootinch
Facebook @firstrootinc
Twitter @firstrootinc
LUKE'S BIO
Luke is one of the world’s leading experts on applying Participatory Budgeting at scale, both in communities and in business settings.
Prior to founding FirstRoot, Luke started Conteneo, an enterprise software platform for collaborative decision making based on game theory.
The author of four books, Luke has been cited as an inventor in more than a dozen patents and is an internationally recognized expert in Agile Software Development.
START TRAINING YOUR KIDS NOW
Here’s a complimentary lesson I made for channel listeners on the 3 Discussions you must have with your kids about safety and survival. It’s only ten minutes long, but could be a life saving 10 minutes of your time spent.
CloseQuarterDad.com/3Discussions
CONNECT AND LEARN MORE
WEBSITE: https://closequarterdad.com
INSTAGRAM: https://instagram.com/closequarterdad
FACEBOOK: https://Facebook.com/closequarterdad
What can you do to support this channel?
- Subscribe, every new listener counts to us
- Engage, we are a community who supports each other
- Leave a review, let us know what you think
- Share, know others who may get some value - then share our channel
Reframing ways you encourage your children through challenges is one of the most important things you can do for them. How often are you checking in on this? Seriously.
In today's conversation, Scott Feld and I go deep into the topic of helping kids find their super powers, and give them the chance to own possibilities, (many we won't even see!), so that they can overcome obstacles and build lasting confidence.
In this episode you will learn about:
- How to give you child solution based options when faced with challenge.
- Acknowledging the value of support versus approval.
- How creativity creates less need for discipline.
- ... so much more.
CONNECT WITH SCOTT FELD
Scott's Website: MinZenMotion
The amazing book for kids, Dax To The Max
Instagram @mindzenmotion
Facebook @scott.feld
SCOTT'S BIO
Scott Feld is a Certified Kids Life Skills Coach and owner of MindZenMotion, which offers both live and online personal development courses for kids and teens. Scott has been working with kids for nearly thirty years, as well as studying, teaching, and coaching growth mindset and social/emotional intelligence for over fifteen years.
Dax is Scott's 5-year-old son who is learning about his own inner powers and wants to share them with other kids.
START TRAINING YOUR KIDS NOW
Here’s a complimentary lesson I made for channel listeners on the 3 Discussions you must have with your kids about safety and survival. It’s only ten minutes long, but could be a life saving 10 minutes of your time spent.
CloseQuarterDad.com/3Discussions
CONNECT AND LEARN MORE
WEBSITE: https://closequarterdad.com
INSTAGRAM: https://instagram.com/closequarterdad
FACEBOOK: https://Facebook.com/closequarterdad
What can you do to support this channel?
- Subscribe, every new listener counts to us
- Engage, we are a community who supports each other
- Leave a review, let us know what you think
- Share, know others who may get some value - then share our channel
In this week's episode of Point of No Return (Episode 34) on the Close Quarter Dad podcast, we sit down with retired Bronx Lt., John Magee and dig into this situation, a woman gets swarmed in a playground by a group of teenage boys, after asking them to stop throwing rocks at an elderly man.
Her request, and standing up for the old man, results in five of the boys violently assaulting her, beating her to the ground. In this episode, John and I break down the important questions and outcomes that every parent should understand when facing these circumstances.
Share your comments below. Keep the discussion going.
Check out the full episode at:
The Devil's Playground, The Point of No Return 2
START TRAINING YOUR KIDS NOW
Here’s a complimentary lesson I made for channel listeners on the 3 Discussions you must have with your kids about safety and survival. It’s only ten minutes long, but could be a life saving 10 minutes of your time spent.
CloseQuarterDad.com/3Discussions
CONNECT AND LEARN MORE
WEBSITE: https://closequarterdad.com
INSTAGRAM: https://instagram.com/closequarterdad
FACEBOOK: https://Facebook.com/closequarterdad
What can you do to support this channel?
- Subscribe, every new listener counts to us
- Engage, we are a community who supports each other
- Leave a review, let us know what you think
- Share, know others who may get some value - then share our channel
On this episode, we’ll be stepping into some topics seldom discussed among men, such as how to teach courage and bravery to kids, guiding kids on courses of action and how to balance their anxieties with anticipation; my friend Jay Tiegs is the man to bring the knowledge. His perspective is refreshing and he carries the credentials to talk-the-talk.
Jay is a High Performance Coach, ultra-athlete and runs the podcast and gear brand, Do Hard Things. As well, Jay has been building leaders in the US Army for over 25-years as a career officer.
Most important, he is a father of triplet teenage girls, so yes - he knows a thing or two about doing hard things.
In this episode you will learn about:
- Teaching your kids the difference between courage and bravery
- Why planning for the most likely course of action is better than the most dangerous
- Why 90 block routines are critical
- Using anticipation to counter your child's anxiety.
- ... so much more.
CONNECT WITH JAY TIEGS
Jay's Website: JayTiegs.com
Instagram @jaytiegs
Facebook @sjtiegs
Do Hard Things Podcast (Spotify)
Do Hard Things Apparel
JAY'S BIO
Jay Tiegs believes taking on difficult challenges in life with persistence and commitment enables people to find great success in life. He is a certified high performance coach and transitioning veteran with over 25 years of service in the United States Army, from private to sergeant first class before commissioning as an officer.
His mantra "Do Hard Things" has enabled him to overcome many struggles in life and achieve success completing difficult challenges. This shift in perspective allowed him to go from a directionless teenager who grew up in a fatherless home to a commissioned officer in the United States Army, where he successfully commanded two units that specialize in leadership development of our nation's next generation of emerging military leaders.
He now shares his outlook on personal transformation as a speaker, trainer, and high performance coach for audiences ranging from elementary school children to executive level leaders.
START TRAINING YOUR KIDS NOW
Here’s a complimentary lesson I made for channel listeners on the 3 Discussions you must have with your kids about safety and survival. It’s only ten minutes long, but could be a life saving 10 minutes of your time spent.
CloseQuarterDad.com/3Discussions
CONNECT AND LEARN MORE
WEBSITE: https://closequarterdad.com
INSTAGRAM: https://instagram.com/closequarterdad
FACEBOOK: https://Facebook.com/closequarterdad
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On this episode, we sit down with leading excellence and mindset coach, former International Taekwon Do champion, ultra marathon runner and proud Dad of three boys, who is involved in more community work than we have space to list here.
Joe details for us, how shifting your mindset to one of daily excellence, empowers rather than enables.
This discussion breaks open how to coach your children through hardships, build their independence and shows how to see 'convenience' for what it truly is, the oppositional force to achieving excellence.
In this episode you will learn about:
- The difference between excellence and convenience
- How to lead your child into hard choices to create resilience
- Implementing the "what if?" and "reset button" tools with your kids
- The chemical reason to smile
- ... so much more.
ABOUT JOE TEMPLIN
Author of Everyday Excellence: A Daily Guide to Growing
Get the book here <-- Amazing!
Joe Templin's Website
JOE TEMPLIN'S BIO
As one of six kids (the only normal one, he insists) growing up in a small town and spending time on the family farm, Joe’s parents (John and Barb) instilled a love of learning, the outdoors, and a healthy disrespect for authority while still simultaneously embracing traditional values of hard work and “love thy neighbor but mind your own dang business.” This is Joe’s foundation.
He was severely asthmatic but through his work ethic and love of challenge has become a martial artist and ultra-distance runner. He had a speech impediment but has built a career around communicating. This habit of overcoming limitations is a theme in his life and his writings.
Joe has three hooligans (Danny, Liam, and Colin) and is a very proud member of the Pi Kappa Phi Fraternity, having served multiple times as President of his local Foundation and Chapter Advisor. He has also served on the local, State, and National levels for NAIFA, is a Cubmaster (worst one ever if you ask his boys), and is involved with his local Autism Society. Serving others is important to Joe, because of how his parents raised him.
START TRAINING YOUR KIDS NOW
Here’s a complimentary lesson I made for channel listeners on the 3 Discussions you must have with your kids about safety and survival. It’s only ten minutes long, but could be a life saving 10 minutes of your time spent.
CloseQuarterDad.com/3Discussions
CONNECT AND LEARN MORE
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FACEBOOK: https://Facebook.com/closequarterdad
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The reality is this, that girl did a good job, from what is seen in the security camera. Without knowing what led to this, or where she was headed to, it's tough to tell. She did however - fight back.
Check out the full episode at:
Point of No Return 1. Overtaken, Fight Back
START TRAINING YOUR KIDS NOW
Here’s a complimentary lesson I made for channel listeners on the 3 Discussions you must have with your kids about safety and survival. It’s only ten minutes long, but could be a life saving 10 minutes of your time spent.
CloseQuarterDad.com/3Discussions
CONNECT AND LEARN MORE
WEBSITE: https://closequarterdad.com
INSTAGRAM: https://instagram.com/closequarterdad
FACEBOOK: https://Facebook.com/closequarterdad
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This is a story every parent should listen to, learn from and then take action. Rachel shares her story about how within 72 hours, her seven week old suffered a traumatic brain injury, her toddler was taken from home and she faced years in prison and made homeless.
She shares how her story is no different than countless parents in our country. With some luck, an expensive attorney and a will to fight, she was able to uncover unthinkable corruption and a system masquerading to protect children, yet often times doing the opposite.
Listen, then share. Rachel's story must be discussed.
In this episode you will learn about:
- What your family can do to protect against social services presumptions
- 5 Steps to keeping your children safe
- Why the many cracks in Child Protection Services can compromise your family, and what you need to do when it does
You will leave this episode shocked, and you must continue the discussion. Talk to your partner, family members, school, local police and representatives. Get educated and ask the hard questions Rachel asked.
ABOUT RACHEL BRUNO
Author of Fractured Hope: A Mother’s Fight for Justice
Get the book here <-- Amazing!
Rachel Bruno's Website
Rachel's 5 Points, Know Your Rights Protect Your Child
RACHEL BRUNO'S BIO
Rachel Bruno is a wife and mother of two young boys. She holds a bachelor’s degree in communication and an MBA from Pepperdine University. She had hopes of starting her own business, and everything seemed to be going according to plan, until the unimaginable happened in 2015.
Rachel had her 7 week old baby and toddler son seized by CPS when her newborn sustained critical cranial injuries while in the care of a nanny. She was evicted from her own home and had to endure a grueling court case to prove her innocence, so her children could be returned to her. Then she pursued suing the authorities who erroneously accused her and put her children through a battery of traumatic tests without parental consent. She won her case in court and was awarded 7 figures in damages.
START TRAINING YOUR KIDS NOW
Here’s a complimentary lesson I made for channel listeners on the 3 Discussions you must have with your kids about safety and survival. It’s only ten minutes long, but could be a life saving 10 minutes of your time spent.
CloseQuarterDad.com/3Discussions
CONNECT AND LEARN MORE
WEBSITE: https://closequarterdad.com
INSTAGRAM: https://instagram.com/closequarterdad
FACEBOOK: https://Facebook.com/closequarterdad
What can you do to support this channel?
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Taking steps to guide your children through difficult experiences, risky obstacles and problem solving without you there, not only builds strong character - it builds resilience. In today's episode, join us in a discussion with someone who offers advice from the pricilnpal's office, that we can use to build kids with courage.
In this episode you will learn about:
- Discovering your child's false narratives, and reframing new stories about themselves
- How to identify distress in your child
- Why it's smart to join forces with your school, how exactly is that done
- How children perceive more than you think, and what you need to do right now about it.
- The first thing you must do when confronting oppositional defiance
- Punishment and reward
- How you must view the no man's land of middle school <-- this one's great!
- Handling separation anxiety
- ... so much more
ABOUT SCOTT ROSSIGNOL
Author of Help From the Principal’s Office, Parenting Advise When Your Kids Have Trouble in School and at Home
Get the book here
Scott's Website: The Guiding Principal
Referenced in this episode: How to Avoid Passing Our Childhood “Baggage” on to Our Kids
Scott's Facebook
SCOTT ROSSIGNOL'S BIO
Scott has spent the last two decades working to better the lives of children, with a specialization in helping elementary school–aged kids learn how to manage unpleasant emotions and control the resulting behaviors. His passion for helping the most vulnerable of children stems back to the trials and tribulations of his own youth.
He is a certified school psychologist and public school special education administrator, who combines his personal experience and professional training to help families navigate some of the most challenging times of their lives.
He worked as a graduate-level college instructor at the University of Connecticut, teaching special education teachers how to identify educational disabilities in students. Additionally, he spent several years working with psychiatrically hospitalized children and adolescents. Scott is currently the principal of a small therapeutic elementary school for children in need of significant social, emotional, and behavioral supports.
START TRAINING YOUR KIDS NOW
Here’s a complimentary lesson I made for channel listeners on the 3 Discussions you must have with your kids about safety and survival. It’s only ten minutes long, but could be a life saving 10 minutes of your time spent.
CloseQuarterDad.com/3Discussions
CONNECT AND LEARN MORE
WEBSITE: https://closequarterdad.com
INSTAGRAM: https://instagram.com/closequarterdad
FACEBOOK: https://Facebook.com/closequarterdad
What can you do to support this channel?
- Subscribe, every new listener counts to us
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- Share, know others who may get some value - then share our channel
I am going to challenge you on making sure your children know 'how' to call 911 in case of an emergency - and I don't mean dialing the numbers.
A few topics covered on this episode
- What your children must know - no excuses
- When is the right time to call 911
- How can you teach your children to speak to 911
- What will happen after they call 911
As you can imagine, this is an extremely important and often overlooked topic for Dads to be teaching their kids. I hope you get something from it.
START TRAINING YOUR KIDS NOW
Here’s a complimentary lesson I made for channel listeners on the 3 Discussion you must have with your kids about safety and survival. It’s only ten minutes long, but could be a life saving 10 minutes of your time spent.
CloseQuarterDad.com/3Discussions
CONNECT AND LEARN MORE
WEBSITE: https://closequarterdad.com
INSAGRAM: https://instagram.com/closequarterdad
FACEBOOK: https://Facebook.com/closequarterdad
What can you do to support this channel?
- Subscribe, every new listener counts to us
- Engage, we are a community who supports each other
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What's the right age to begin teaching these topics to children, and what does that training and guidance look like from Dad?
This episode was a response to some questions asked to me by a fellow Dad. My answer had so much to it, I made and episode I broke down some helpful steps for Dads who want to start teaching their children at a young age.
- Why NOT to enroll them in martial arts (0:30)
- Why is touching important for safety (1:42)
- One of the scariest thing I show parents (3:02)
- What to say when holding hands (3:52)
- How to wrestle with a little boy (4:22)
I hope this information is helpful, and gets you started on your journey to raising some tough, resilient and strong kids.
START TRAINING YOUR KIDS NOW
Here’s a complimentary lesson I made for channel listeners on the 3 Discussion you must have with your kids about safety and survival. It’s only ten minutes long, but could be a life saving 10 minutes of your time spent.
CloseQuarterDad.com/3Discussions
CONNECT AND LEARN MORE
WEBSITE: https://closequarterdad.com
INSAGRAM: https://instagram.com/closequarterdad
FACEBOOK: https://Facebook.com/closequarterdad
What can you do to support this channel?
- Subscribe, every new listener counts to us
- Engage, we are a community who supports each other
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- Share, know others who may get some value - then share out channel
In the last episode, we explained and defined the four phases of violent crime, helping you to identify what potential threat types are, who they're going to come from, what those threats may be and what we need to start focusing when discussing this with our kids.
In this episode we want to move into the actual lifecycle of violent crime and break it down into the four steps.
- Pre conflict
- Crisis
- Response
- Post-conflict
There is the lead-up in the escalation and then there's what's called the point of no return, which is crisis. This is when the actual crime has been committed, where it goes hands-on when the situation gets hot.
The crisis period is very, very small, sometimes just seconds.
I'm going to add into the tail end of the crisis period the response period, or post freeze; when you or your child recognizes that it's gone to the point of no return. This could be
- After the assault has happened
- After you've already hit the ground
- After you're thrown into a car
- After you've recognized you are lost in the wilderness
- After you realize your child has been separated from you
- .. on and on
Basically, we're at that point of no return and we have a response.
Then comes post-conflict. This phase can:
- Extend into years of legal circumstances in criminal or civil court, litigation
- Immediately after, self triage
- Articulation to law enforcement.
- The first one to call 911
- Communicating with loved ones, friends
- Mental and emotional care for children
- ... on and on
Most martial arts or self-defense programs only focus solely on the point of no return, only in crisis. They don't holistically teach you the full-circle or the complete life cycle of any violent situation.
START TEACHING YOUR KIDS NOW
Here’s a complimentary lesson I made for channel listeners on the 3 Discussion you must have with your kids about safety and survival. It’s only ten minutes long, but could be a life saving 10 minutes of your time spent.
CloseQuarterDad.com/3Discussions
Connect with us and learn more about Close Quarter Dad
WEBSITE: https://closequarterdad.com
INSAGRAM: https://instagram.com/closequarterdad
FACEBOOK: https://Facebook.com/closequarterdad
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The next threat within what I consider the four phases of violent crime is the Face of the Criminal. This is not going have too much to do with yourself or your child, as it simply happens that they may find themself in the wrong place at the wrong time.
An example of this situation might be at a gas station where they went in to pay for gas, and there happened to be an armed robbery in progress. Wrong place, wrong time - confronted by a criminally minded individual, who has not necessarily targeted you or your child.
In terms of your child being victimized, this is second to the Friend, or someone they already have built trust with.
Facing the Criminal is not something you pre-plan against as the variables are not within any spectrum of control or timing, however the direction for preparing your child’s ability to recognize and respond quickly, bypassing the freeze factor, is what can be done!
Ignoring this opportunity to help your children here, is leaving them incapable of functioning in this situation.
You absolutely can help them to get through this, should it ever happen to them. In a future episode we will discuss this more, and we will also look into what steps could be taken to support them when suddenly Facing the Criminal..
In this episode, we will explore the two priorities of how to engage your children when training them to stay safe, regardless of age or scenario. These two priorities are, providing your child with the foundation to build a strong sense of self, and teaching them the tools of proper communication.
Complete Article: The Priority of Communication for Keeping Kids Safe
If teaching your child how to stay safe in all of life's circumstances is important to you, come join us at: CloseQuarterDad.com
Learn about other Dads like yourself, training how to teach their kids safe: Join the CQD Dojo
Enjoy this episode and let me know what you think - Adam
There is really one of four faces or four situations that they're gonna find themselves in. If you're able to understand this, then you're able to move your own training, your own discussions and your own paradigm in the proper way.
A lot of self-defense programs teach stranger danger. A lot of discussions and a lot of paradigms that parents have are don't talk to strangers.
How many times were you told that when you were a kid, don't talk, just don't trust strangers?
But, the reality is in possibly a situation where you get separated from your child; maybe you're in the city, you're looking in the window, you turn around and your little girl is gone; or maybe it's a situation where you're getting off a train and you're little girl drops her doll, she goes back to grab it, the doors close and the train goes; we could go on and on with all these different scenarios, but it's at that point that we really need to count on strangers.
The reason for creating close quarter parenting is, back in 2006 I began to recognize something that was pretty unique, and I don't know if I would have ever realized this if I wasn't in the unique situation I was in as a martial arts instructor and as a father.
As a teacher here, and the owner of my martial arts school, I started to work with and engage with obviously a lot of kids and had a lot of kids in my dojo.
The majority of my students are adults, but I had a lot of children here and we were able to build the school up to about 200 children and it's a lot of kids, so I'm engaging with a lot of parents.
What I started to realize after a while is the majority of the parents were moms and at first, for the first few years, I just sort of took it as a soccer mom thing that dads were at work and moms were at home and after school the moms took the kids to karate lessons.
Then I started to notice something a little bit deeper as being a dad myself, is that the father's, a few dads were coming in and those dads that came in were highly engaged with me.
View the entire article here:
Let's talk about understanding the difference between improvisational training and functional training and how we should approach working with our children to give them a clear understanding and skill set of for personal protection.
How can they really take ownership of the lessons you teach them, and do so in a way that they don't get discouraged?
Training by nature comes with risk, and the risk exists in both functional and improvisational models of training. Understanding that first, (before I get into the differences between the two approaches to training) is important.
Danger exists physically and mentally in training. Mentally can be space or experience where someone gets discouraged iand they quit. We don't want them to do that, we want them to stay motivated, to enjoy the experience.
But we also want the experience to be garnished with reality. We want the experience experience to be at sometimes shocking, but of course not traumatic.
We want them to understand the experience and to slowly, gradually increase their threshold for fear and discomfort.
Full article, visit: https://www.closequarterdad.com/blog/functional-improvisational-training
Website: https://closequarterdad.com
We can empower our kids with the best techniques to stay safe if someone grabs them, or teach them how to prevent a bully from hurting them
… or we can show them what to do if a group of kids tries jumping them
… or we can even show them how to get out of the trunk of a car they're locked inside.
The scenarios go on and on.
But the reality is, if your children don't know how to manage and cope with stress properly, they will be at much greater statistical risk throughout their lives, to encounter suffering or self imposed violence. Read that again.
In a previous episode I shared some basic exercises, tools and discussions we can have with our kids about stress and anxiety.
I think even more important is making sure they model how you manage stress, as that's what it's going to come down to. The are watching how you manage it, during each stage of their life, and carrying that reflection with them as a reference.
How do they cope with this? Well, that’s up to you.
If you're the you're the kind of dad who expresses himself with, “F**k! I'm so stressed out … leave me alone right now I’m in the middle of doing … too many things going on at work … “ and you're referencing all this tension, all the time, your kids are going to respond in that exact same way.
Let’s take a step back, and consider a more mindful approach.
Visit the complete article
Download a free copy of the classic book, "Jiu Jitsu Combat Tricks"
Over the last few days, I've been handling a situation with my oldest son. He's 18 years old and he's dealing with a fight that happened here in our community that involved his friends.
My son called me from somewhere in about 12:30 am the other evening and explained to me that a group of his friends had been jumped.
I dug into the details a little bit more.
His friends had gone to meet a another group of kids to watch a one on one fight to settle something that had escalated at a McDonald’s parking lot earlier that evening; one of these stupid teenage dramas that sadly escalated to a point of no return.
His friends showed up at the designated fight location, and apparently all of them ended up getting jumped by a large(r) group of kids.
The situation turned pretty bad.
A baseball baseball bat had hit a kid’s head, a knife was involved in a stabbing, someone got hit with a hammer with the claw side of a framing hammer and these boys got beat down.
Painfully and unnecessarily, group of kids ended up in the hospital.
This situation escalated quick went beyond the point of no return.
Young people got severely injured.
When I heard about this for my son, I asked him calmly,
How can I help you?
After I listened to his confused answer, I followed with,
How do you feel about this?
He went on to explain that he had been playing basketball that afternoon with a group of the kids that were involved in jumping his friends. So now I could see the dilemma he's trying to figure out how to navigate.
Well, the police got involved and are currently investigating, so we're sort of past that point. And like most dads, I would say Well, don't get involved.
That's the first thing that comes to mind, right?
Not now. I’m not so certain that's what my son wanted to hear from his dad.
He was sharing his anxiety with me over the situation. He had certain feelings. He wanted to lash out. He wanted seek retribution for what had happened to his friends.
My response to him was simple and a bit unexpected,
‘This is the outcome. If you want to be involved in violence… even as a witness, then you're opening the door to trauma. You are opening a door to allowing yourself to suffer.’
He’s just going to see a shoulder shrug for me, and that's about it.
I've raised my son to understand this. He knows that I'm not a fan of violence.
He knows that I understand what the outcome is.
I don't really believe in the glorification of it.
I don't believe in the monkey dancing.
But (in his paradigm) telling him to leave it alone is no different than telling him to not stick up for his friends. You've got to stick up for your friends, always. But how?
Those boys went looking for a fight and they got a fight. End of story. That's it. Go back to playing basketball.
It's terrible what happened. The outcome was terrible.
Young people got hurt.
Young people were also involved in hurting other young people. And that's going to stay with them for the rest of their lives.
As mentioned, there’s a current investigation going on. It will affect family finances, college plans, future career potential even.
Most of these boys are seniors in high school, good kids, from good families, getting ready to go off to College. Now what?
When you distill it down to the most basic level, in my opinion and the message that I had to my son was that, if you want to play with violence if it's you feel cultural pressure, social pressure, influenced by entertainment … to take it to that level because of some stupid incident that happened in a parking lot.
Well, guess what?
Read the rest of this article at My Son Wants Revenge, at Close Quarter Dad
In this episode I want to challenge you to ask yourself what I call threatening questions.
These are questions that as a parent, we don't want to face … they are dark. They are questions we may not even know to ask ourselves.
- What if I get separated from you in the city, I get lost and it's dark? What do I do?
- Will I really have to fight to save my life some day?
- What happens if you get hurt? What am I supposed to do
- What if a police officer tells me to go with him because you and mom have been hurt and they need to take me to the hospital to be with you?
- If I hear gunshots at school, what should I really do?
- That man makes me feel really uncomfortable, what am I supposed to say to him every time he talks to me?
- You told me not to talk to strangers. But if I call 911 the operator that answers is a stranger also. So who really is a stranger?
- What happens if a mean person comes at us in the parking lot and they want to hurt you? What should I?
- I watched a kid get beat up today. What should I have done?
- I heard the gas station was robbed last week. What happens if I was at the gas station when it got robbed? What should I do? What happens if you lose me?
- What happens when I see someone bullying or hurting another kid?
- What happens if I get separated from everybody and I get lost in the woods?
- What happens if one day someone pulls me into a car and I can't get out? What do I do?
We could go on and on with these with these examples. What’s important right now is that you simply take some time and think of one question that truly puts you in a place of fear.
What is that one question you just never would want to face.
Do you know the answer to that question?
The reality is that if I put 20 men in one room and I asked them to write down the answer to any one of the questions that I just gave examples up, the strong likelihood is that I will receive 20 different answers.
There's usually gonna be no more than three appropriate answers given the situation.
So if there were a couple questions that you had a challenge with don't worry, it's totally natural.
You are invited into close quarter dad, our community of other fathers like yourself who are answering those questions and asking many more.
We're addressing topics of,
- Personal protection
- Family security
- Loss prevention
- Last resort survival training.
There's a free program called the Core Conflict Concepts, where I really break down the difference between the topics of personal protection and martial arts and why sending your child to a martial arts school may not be the solution for keeping your child safe.
You see, too many people, unfortunately, go forward with thinking,
“if I put my kid into a martial arts school, they're gonna be able to keep themselves safe, able to fight off a bully” … or all this nonsense.
It's just not true.
Interested in joining our group of Dad’s?
Join us at Close Quarter Dad for more information on our courses and access our library of tactical parenting videos and articles. See you on the next episode.
As a professional martial artist, I've made it a career for more than a decade to teach people from all walks of life, young and old, how to remain safe. Discovery of self preservation and safety is not merely about learning a technique to apply against a bad guy, although most martial arts systems today are systemized like this. This type of approach is shortsighted at best, lacking the critical principles of escalation and de-escalation, both of which rely on the practitioners deeper understanding and exposure to reality based training at many more levels than is what is popular in most academies today. Easy to teach techniques make money, but very, very rarely equip a student to survive.
From my perspective, the study of true martial arts has nothing to do with sport. It even has little to do with neutralizing an enemy combatant in the field of battle. True martial arts has everything to do with developing the skills to remain in control especially under dire circumstances. Of course the skills and proficiencies of my students mature as their time spent training stacks up, but more important is the maturity of their ability to remain in control as anxiety, fear, shock, trauma or loss of life become extremely real within moments. Due to the constant exposure of survive at all costs simulation in the Dojo, my students can become more adapt to these circumstances and quell the physiological changed during escalation. It is about self control. These are the things of battle and being able to demonstrate control under horrible conditions is the hallmark of a warrior.
Any brute can cut another down with a blade or bullet, but the warrior will complete the battle before it escalates into chaos. They will survive and if they do not, the legacy they've left will certainly allow those remaining to share a higher standard of living. This is how I've come to know the meaning of martial arts and the ultimate reason we train them in the west. In Japanese, it is known as the Bushido.
The arts that I've dedicated much of my life to understanding have remained relatively unchanged since the Warring States Period in Japanese history, yet have adapted in many interesting ways to the times and technology of the present day. We still retain the old protocol and wear the old attire. Our Dojo smells of a myriad of incense, wood walls and sweat. In the winter the Dojo is frigidly cold and in the summer it is like working out inside an oven. Yet still, each day we are able to step our bare feet onto the tatami matted floor of the Dojo and begin to practice in formats shared by previous generations of warriors. The simulation of death and survival occurs over and over again, day after day, year after year. We are dedicated to preserving this tradition and these ways with all that we have while applying the principles of cause and effect found into our modern day routines and relationships.
Read the complete article
In this video, I challenge you to ask your child a question. Try it out and see what they say.
I discuss some first steps you can teach your child in case they become separated from you or a group they may be with - and suddenly find themselves alone and lost.
Let’s discuss an observation I've made over the last 20 years of teaching martial arts, engaging with parents and working with their children; the massive impact a dad has on their child when they actually participate in that activity.
It doesn't necessarily have to be martial arts. It can be any sports activity, artistic program or challenging interest your child has. But you can no longer stand on the sidelines, barking commands. I am challenging you to actually sharing the path they are on.
Whether it's at a coaching level, or it's actually participating in classes with your child, actually ‘doing the work’ makes an incredibly huge impact on how they view you.
RESOURCES
Check out the full article here:
Why every parent should share a path with their kids
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Close Quarter Dad
Today I want to share with you an answer to a question I get asked a lot; can I recommend a book that would help immerse myself into the study of self-defense and personal protection?
Oftentimes I might get asked by a parent who doesn't want to get himself involved in martial arts. Whether they don't have the time or the interest, but they still want to be able to equip their self, armed with good information, so that they can pass that information onto their children.
They can help strengthen their children, give them a better understanding of personal protection and safety, as well as family protection.
One of the books that I couldn't recommend more, whether you're a martial artist or not, is the book by Rory Miller called Meditations on Violence.
This book, for me, it was life changing.
I've been doing martial arts almost all of my life. I've been teaching martial arts pretty much my entire adult life. I know it pretty well.
What I can tell you is that this book will shatter most misconceptions that you have about violence, about understanding fighting. A lot of times if you were to say,
"Oh, I want to take my kids to a martial arts school because I want them to learn how to stick up for him or herself, or I want to learn how to fight, I want to get some skills or that won't work in the street."
Or any of these different paradigms and ideas and concepts.
This book is going to super align them, to truly look into the mind and the actions of a predator, and anybody who is going to potentially target your child, why are they going to target your child. What is it that your child is doing to motivate them to target your child?
The author Rory Miller has not only been involved in teaching and training use of force programs to military law enforcement all over the world, but he was also in corrections for his career, and he has a lot of authority when it comes to speaking on this topic.
As well, he's a martial artist. He talks very clearly about his experience and thoughts on martial arts, so he is able to look at this with a very holistic perspective.
So once again, the book is Meditations on Violence, couldn't recommend it more.
If you're interested in the topic, the life cycle of violence, realities of violence, being able to go beyond a lot of popular myths and misunderstandings about violence... Then this is the book for you.
In fact, if you're a martial artist, I would say this is mandatory reading. It's mandatory reading for all my adult students. So Meditations on Violence by Rory Miller, a Comparison of Martial Arts Training and Real World Violence. Highly, highly recommended.
Other works by Rory Miller that you'll enjoy include:
Facing Violence, Preparing for the Unexpected
Training for Sudden Violence: 72 Practical Drills
Conflict Communication
Are you having discussions with your children about the topic of violence and where violence is may happen in their life, how they're going to be able to manage it, what happens when they see it, how to make basic sense of it?
Well, in this episode, I will introduce you to a couple of tactics you can use to have those very important discussions with your children about violence.
Let's get started.
First, why is it that we don't have those discussions with our children about the topic of violence? Meanwhile, violence is all around them, whether it be in entertainment, in media, at school, in music… they're constantly exposed to high, high levels of violence all around them.
How often do we have those discussions so they make sense of it and they're able to manage it inside their heads for the rest of their lives?
Let’s look back at when we were kids. When I was a young child, the actual discussion of emotional-based topics such as sexuality was just something completely taboo. It was barely discussed in schools. When it was, it was in specific 15 minute classes that were for some reason taught by our gym teacher.
To watch the video or access the full transcript, go to:
How to speak with your kids about violence
I want to talk a little bit about the zero tolerance policy and how we can have discussions with our children about it.
It seems counterintuitive to teach our children self-defense only to be told in school, if they defend themselves at any level, well, it's going to work against them. That they may even get kicked out of school or put on some longterm suspension.
A little background first.
The zero tolerance policy became a pretty common thing in the mid-1990s, as school administrations' adherence to certain laws were put in place back in 1994 about firearms. This is where it all began. Then it spilled over into drugs and violence.
Some school administrations have gone so far to say that if there is in-school violence, any type of fight or a situation of bullying, then both parties are going to be removed and dismissed. That’s absolute zero tolerance.
Some of us can be pretty critical about that policy. Meanwhile, others can be very accepting to it and saying, "Look, I want zero violence in our school regardless." Either way it comes down to a simple fact that if we’re teaching children personal protection, then we have to also make sure that they know how to articulate certain situations to school administrators, teachers or adults.
And make them FAST instead
Let's have a discussion about something we say to our kids all the time.
I want to reframe this for you, help you to look at something that's so common that every parent, especially dads, say to their kids. Whether it's when they're learning to become better at sports, or whether it's something to do with academics - any life skill for that matter that we're trying to teach them, and it takes a certain amount of effort, and a certain amount of repetition for them to be able to capture what it is that they're trying to do, and to be able to develop that skill set, and to work themselves towards some degree of expertise or excellence at it.
It's most commonly used in sports, it's used in academics, used in all sorts of life skills.
I'll share with you the three reasons why you should not say this to your kids anymore then you'll be on a whole new path to helping your kids achieve success.
The saying is,
practice makes perfect.
How many times have you said that to your kids?
We say it all the time with the best of intentions, too, but one of the things that we have to understand is that practice simply does not make perfect.
You can be a little bit wrong, just a little bit wrong, and the only thing that doing something with 10,000 repetitions is going to do is it's going to help you to become really good at doing the technique wrong.
Practice doesn't make perfect because practicing one thing over and over again without the persistence towards perfection, focusing truly on the form, and mastering first the formula of what the expectation is ... In a personal protection context, it's going to be doing a technique right, really diving down and understanding why the technique works, how the technique is going to work, and then being able to discover the movement, or the principles, or the characteristic of the lesson within different contexts, many different variables, many different scenarios or situations.
Then, once you have mastery of the technique and you thoroughly understand it then it's through the persistence of training and doing the technique over and over again with many different variables.
Will you be able to develop the mastery?
Check out the complete episode here,
Stop telling your kids this one thing
at CloseQuarterDad.com
In this second of two episodes, Avi Nardia (Major, IDF Res.) shares his deep insight to the flaws in martial art programs today for kids, and how parents can recognize a quality leader within schools.
As well, Avi shares how he chooses to guide his own son, by taking him around the world while allowing him to find his own path. Some powerful messages here for us all.
Finally, Avi shares with us about the work he is currently doing in Africa, dedicating his time and resources to helping the children in one of Africa's largest slums study martial arts.
Avi Nardia is not only one of my teachers, one of my inspirations in the world of martial arts, but someone I have the honor and privilege to also call him a friend.
I am really excited and I could not speak more highly of this man as a warrior but also as a fellow father. It is really exciting for me that is going to be the kick off podcast, the kick off episode for Close-Quarter Dad, and I would love and I am excited to introduce all of you to my friend Avi Nardia sensei.
About Avi Nardia
Avi Nardia is a world renowned martial artist. He has taught around the world for decades and travels to clubs throughout Europe, the Americas and Asia to teach his own self defense martial art KAPAP.
During his 24 years as a reserve officer, Avi Nardia (Major, IDF Res.) served as an official hand-to-hand instructor and safety officer
Resources
AviNardia.com
In this first of two episodes, Avi Nardia (Major, IDF Res.) shares with us the amazing history KAPAP/Krav-Maga formed in the early history of Israel. Reflections of his father and other military men from elite military units are shared, and his recollection of their teachings.
As well, Avi dives into how Israeli martial arts and self defense truly came to the west and many of the misconceptions people have of it's past.
Avi Nardia is not only one of my teachers, one of my inspirations in the world of martial arts, but someone I have the honor and privilege to also call him a friend.
I am really excited and I could not speak more highly of this man as a warrior but also as a fellow father. It is really exciting for me that is going to be the kick off podcast, the kick off episode for Close-Quarter Dad, and I would love and I am excited to introduce all of you to my friend Avi Nardia sensei.
About Avi Nardia
Avi Nardia is a world renowned martial artist. He has taught around the world for decades and travels to clubs throughout Europe, the Americas and Asia to teach his own self defense martial art KAPAP.
During his 24 years as a reserve officer, Avi Nardia (Major, IDF Res.) served as an official hand-to-hand instructor and safety officer
Resources
AviNardia.com
Why your kid may not have situational awareness, and how you can fix it
I want to have a discussion with you about situational awareness and be able to share with you some ideas and techniques that you can use with your children to help them to be able to identify potential risks, hazards, or threats, as well as obstacles and exits; should they need to be able to get themselves out of a dangerous situation quickly and effectively.
Situational awareness kind of seems like a tactical term, and I guess it is, but more than anything, it's just having a positive assessment of your environment in any condition.
Things that might be dangerous, things that might create a risk, possibly people that I know are going to challenge your child. They want to be able to identify that quickly remove their self or de escalate those situations in the best way possible.
It's really nothing more than coaching your children like you already do to look both ways before they cross the road, or, "Always be aware of your surroundings." And I can go on and on with examples.
Go to the full episode here: Close Quarter Dad
Today I want to share a really cool drill you can do with your children. Don’t forget, make it playful – don’t be captain serious.
This exercise will help you teach your child to create immediate decisiveness when it comes to either threatening or threatening stressful situations.
It’s called The Sleeve Catcher.
The Sleeve Catcher name is actually coined after a old Japanese law enforcement tool that the police used called the sodegarami, a spiked staff used to catch the kimono of a violent criminal. They'd catch the garment and force him to the ground in order to restrain them.
The Sleeve Catcher is an excellent exercise that helps your child create fast initiative and rapid, decisive decision-making, without telegraphing their mind or body.
First show them two steps. The first is simply have them begin in a natural standing position, and then quickly step forward and slightly off center-line. Without stopping their motion, they will turn 180 degrees facing opposite in which they were standing with their hands lifted slightly in front of them, as though placing the palms on a wall that’s close to them.
The second is a little more complicated, so don’t introduce it until the first movement is done successfully several dozen times. So we don’t get ahead of ourselves, I’ll introduce the second movement at the end of the exercise.
Now, your role. Begin by extending your arm to hold your hand about three to four inches away from their shoulder sleeve. Use a parallel grab, in other words; prepare to grip their left shoulder sleeve using your right hand.
Here’s where it gets fun.
The moment the sense that you're about to grab their sleeve, I want them to one way or the other, in the manner you showed them.At the same time, they will be pushing you away, or they're moving the arm away. Don’t make this a martial arts, it’s not mean to be some type of karate block. What I ultimately want them to do is to move behind you, and stunning you at some level.
Check out the complete episode: Close Quarter Dad
One of the priorities to your child's self awareness is helping them grow up with a positive self image. In this episode we discuss how not falling into destructive narratives, imposter roles, or simply not being happy about who they are can be an easy trap for young people to fall into. But it doesn't have to be that way if we are guiding them correctly.
But guess what? Things happen, mistakes, rejection, peer pressure - and what then? How do we show them how to stay strong in those moments and not let our broken moments define who we become? That's what we talk about in this episode.
- What is Kintsugi (0:49)
- The problem with morning affirmations (2:24)
- Step forward into self image (4:24)
- Controlling the final image people have of you (7:07)
This is a powerful discussion, and one we all need. Our self image drives so much of what we do and the decisions we make, therefore we must be vigilant as men and not only guide our kids to positive self image - but have it ourselves.
START TRAINING YOUR KIDS NOW
Here’s a complimentary lesson I made for channel listeners on the 3 Discussion you must have with your kids about safety and survival. It’s only ten minutes long, but could be a life saving 10 minutes of your time spent.
CloseQuarterDad.com/3Discussions
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- Subscribe, every new listener counts to us
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I’m going to recommend that maybe you ‘not’ enroll your 3-5 year old in a martial arts program. If anything, enroll them into a gymnastics, tumbling program.
You see, let’s imagine they ‘actually do’ end up getting rough with a kid in their kindergarten class. The other child ends up grabbing your child, causing her to fall over.
Going to the ground safely, rolling, being aware of what’s on the ground and coming back to their feet is more important to their immediate safety, than that mean kindergartener.
If you do chose to enroll your little one into a martial art at such a young age, then I strongly encourage an art like quality Judo or Brazilian Jiujitsu.
Check out the complete episode at Close Quarter Dad
Where it all began and what motivated me to start Close Quarter Dad; this episode is a brief outline of why the topics of personal protection, loss prevention and family safety must be taught by Dads everywhere.
I discuss,
- The different discussions you have with your kids (1:20)
- What I'll be sharing in on this channel (1:30)
- Question 2 (time stamp)
- ..And more
Start training your kids now. Here’s a complimentary lesson I made for channel listeners on the 3 Discussion you must have with your kids about safety and survival. It’s only ten minutes long, but could be a life saving 10 minutes of your time spent.
CloseQuarterDad.com/3Discussions
Connect with us and learn more about Close Quarter Dad
WEBSITE: https://closequarterdad.com
INSAGRAM: https://instagram.com/closequarterdad
FACEBOOK: https://Facebook.com/closequarterdad
What can you do to support this channel?
- Subscribe, every new listener counts to us
- Engage, we are a community who supports each other
- Leave a review, let us know what you think
- Share, know others who may get some value - then share out channel