“Hitting the Wall 1.0” Adapted from Chasing the Sage, by Bud Lamb
The BIG IDEA
When you hit the wall running a marathon, it feels like you have run face-first into a stack of bricks. Your legs start feeling like concrete posts, every step is a triumph of will, and you seriously doubt that the race has a finish line.
Save me, O God, for the floodwaters are up to my neck. Deeper and deeper I sink into the mire; I can’t find a foothold. I am in deep water, and the floods overwhelm me. Psalm 69:1-2 NLT
Physically, the first time I hit The Wall running was in the Big Sur Marathon at about mile marker 20. My legs felt like hamburger, my arms like lead, my head was in a fog. I felt like quitting.
Near the Carmel Highlands, when I was about to cash in my chips, my friend Al Polly -- an elite, but injured marathoner who was not able to run this race -- came out of nowhere and started running alongside me. Al ran with me and paced me in to finish my first marathon.
In my late 20’s I hit the Wall of Life. That is, I was flunking out of college because of my growing addictions and I had no vision for those two questions that can keep us awake at night. “Who am I and what am I doing?” I was about to cash in my chips and I hit The Wall.
Scholars (beginning with Blaise Pascal) say we have a God-shaped hole in our hearts which nothing but God can fill, yet we try to fill it with all sorts of counterfeits. These counterfeits never deliver and only drive us to The Wall.
I remember reading books that I thought would help me. Books on spiritual things such as The Tibetan Book of the Dead, books on transcendental meditation, The Prophet by Kalil Gibran, Jonathan Living Seagull by Richard Bach, poetry by Richard Brautigan, Be Here Now by Ram Das, and finally, The Holy Bible.
Nothing I read captured my attention or came close to the hole in my heart until I began to read about Jesus and His teaching.
Out of gas and short on hope, I found Jesus, like Al Polly, running alongside me. Jesus ran me in the rest of the way.
How did He do that?
Well, He came to me. God comes to us when we are broken, lost, and out of gas.
Next, I said “Yes” and accepted His invitation to run with me. I’ve been running with Jesus ever since. Ultimately this movement from orphan to son begins and ends with saying “Yes” to Jesus' invitation.
Come to Me (Jesus) all who are weary and heavy-laden and I will give you rest. Matthew 11:28
The Bible is very clear about this adoption process.
...all who believed him (Jesus) and accepted him, he gave the right to become children of God. John 1:12
This isn’t about being good enough. It’s about accepting a gift. For me, it was a gift I hardly understood. What I did know was that I needed help. Just like in the marathon, I recognized my powerlessness to proceed on my own. I needed help making positive strides and making progress.
The same with my soul, my life; I needed help and only God could fill that hole in my heart. All other attempts to fill that void just sucked me deeper and deeper into a black hole.
Jesus, speaks to every orphan, saying to us today - No, I will not abandon you as orphans - I will come to you. John 14:18
Over these past 40 years as an adopted son of God, I’ve hit the wall many times. As a runner, I’m slow but steady. On my spiritual journey, it’s the same. God is the picture of patience and meets us where we are on the road -- not where we think we should be.
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