The little things children do that might end up being a problem for them in adulthood.
Being overly independent when parents are not emotionally or physically available.
Trying to make the parent happy when the parent is going through challenges. They entertain or try to do tasks.
They avoid showing upset to please their parents.
They might agree with everything without expressing their own preferences due to fear or to avoid upsetting parents.
They might look after a parent with addictions, an ill parent and siblings.
They might find ways to make money or to get food.
They create an alternate reality to escape from their stresses Children who are alienated ot feel rejected post parental separation might create a defensive split self. This self arises from distorted parenting practices and the projection of parental anxieties onto the child.
There is more a child might do as an act of denial of their emotions. If adults are not available to hold space and teach the children to express their emotions, these coping strategies will continue in adulthood.
As a parent, recognise your child as a sovereign individual with own emotions and needs. Hold the needs of your child in high regard no matter what you are going through.
Heal for your children.