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the 12-step program, and yet I wasn’t participating at all. Sure I worded the s I did all of the actions that seem to be required of me teps and for anyone who was looking, (and I thought everyone was looking), I did all of the actions that made me look good if not feel-good about myself. This time, I have looked deeply into the original 12 steps and let the reasons doing each and every step burned into my mind.

Actually, I’m not really sure what to call this time. It’s not anything like all of those phony times that I was in the 12 step program. I was in the program in order to benefit, in some material way, so I could go out and do my thing again. But, when I refer to this time, it seems like it is a completely different program for me. I actually became powerless and realized I was not able to truly manage any part of my life. I realized I had to come to terms with how a higher power fit into my life and ultimately realized that my higher power is my life! I became very cognizant and personal about what each of the steps that lay ahead meant to my spirit into my life. I was no longer trying to impress anyone. I was no longer trying to be the object that was necessary in everyone else’s wife. I was trying to do this subject that was necessary in my life. Him

Him So each of these steps became an event for me rather than some many words on paper. I looked at the original version of step number seven. It is:

I humbly, on my knees, I asked Him to remove my shortcomings — holding nothing back.

Wow! I thought of what it said in the book, “Many of us exclaimed, what an order, I cannot go through with it!” But the truth is, I have gotten through it,. Not once, not twice, but many times. You see I had to realize one small fact I am a human being! I could say this step with all of the sincerity I had within, but it has taken me a while to remove the shortcomings, even with God’s help.

Now, I’m not saying that God cannot or will not remove all of your shortcomings immediately. Actually, I hope he does. We are each different in God’s eyes as well as having a different role to play once we become “changed” in His eyes. As we become entrenched in this spiritual journey of the 12 steps, of a new way of life, a lot is asked of us by God in order to bring us even closer to Him, to be able to follow his direction.