What your being/container attracts on default and unconsciously is a result of your love blueprint. There are two types of love blueprint, the healthy and unhealthy one. Whichever type we possess reflects in our interpersonal and romantic relationships, how we communicate, emote down to how we respond to compliments.
Our love blueprint stems from our childhood, our relationship with our caregivers/parents growing up. They say your relationship with your parents is the foundation of every other relationship you have. This is quite true because our parents and caregivers were our first contact to love, care, safety, trust, and vulnerability.
Sadly, not all of us have a healthy love blueprint where it is safe, feels like home, self-love for two, and vulnerability is okay. Instead, many are products of unhealthy love blueprint where there is a lack of trust with one's self as well as others, unhealthy attachment styles like people-pleasing, avoidant personality, emotional addiction (to fear, rejection, anxiety, abandonment), lack of boundaries, and emotional depth. There are lots of highs and lows when in a relationship with someone with an unhealthy love blueprint. One's past trauma reflects and that goes on to shape how we move in the world as adults and the impact we have on other people around us and society as a whole.
In this episode of NO JUDGEMENT, Sheifunmi and his guest co-host Owen, discuss their love blueprint and how they were able to heal and grow from a place of an unhealthy love blueprint to a healthy one. They talk about co-dependency, trauma bonding, not feeling safe enough to be vulnerable, and things they suppressed as a child which went on to influence their love blueprint as adults. Sheifunmi credits therapy and self-awareness for helping him with his inner work and confronting past traumas which helped him turn his love blueprint around to a healthier mind space and blueprint.