wis·dom

/ˈwizdəm/

noun   The quality of having experience, knowledge, and good judgment; the quality of being wise.   Transcript

welcome

to victorious in recovery what you're

about to hear is simply one man's

journey to victory over addiction

my ups and downs and everything in

between and the solutions that i find

along the way

my purpose is this

to let you know that you're not alone in

the things that we go through trying to

recover and that there is hope of a

recovered life from addiction my name is

david victorious and i'll be your host

[Music]

thank you for tuning in to victorious

and recovery

it's middle of the week and

i've been having a lot of things come up

in my studies this week i've had

a little more time on my hands and i've

been able to

spend a little

time in meditation that i haven't gotten

to spend in a long time

and i've been thinking about

the upcoming steps

i'm still waiting on my

sponsor to

do step 3 with me

but as we tend to do

i've been thinking ahead a little bit

not in a bad way not in a future

tripping way

just

staying conscious of what's to come

kind of mentally preparing for it which

i think is a healthy look forward

in one of my studies yesterday

proverbs 4 came up

and i wanted to share

just a few of my thoughts with you guys

proverbs 4 is about getting wisdom

it's titled get wisdom at any cost

and on verse 1 it starts listen my sons

to a father's instruction

pay attention and gain understanding

i give you sound learning

so do not forsake my teaching

for i too was the son to my father

still tender and cherished by my mother

then he taught me

and he said to me

take hold of my words

with all your heart

keep my commands and you will live

get wisdom get understanding

do not forget my words

or turn away from them

do not forsake wisdom

and she will protect you

love her and she will watch over you

the beginning of wisdom is this

get wisdom

though it may cost all you have

get understanding

cherish her and she will exalt you

embrace her and she will honor you

she will give you a garland to grace

your head

and present you with a glorious crown

listen my son

accept what i say

and the years of your life will be many

i instruct you in the way of wisdom

and lead you along straight paths

when you walk your steps will not be

hampered

when you run you will not stumble

hold on to instruction do not let it go

guard it well

for it is your life

so that was proverbs 4 1-13

and there's so much of that

that i can relate to i can relate to

that as a aspiring good father

i can relate to that as the son that

remembers a couple of things from my dad

i can relate to that because

it says there at the end hold on to your

instruction

do not let it go guard it well

for it is your life

and to me that that's talking about

experiences

it's talking about

what i've gone through what i've learned

from it and to not let it go

what i've done in the past what i've

been in the habit of doing is i'll go

through something difficult

and

i'll want to erase it i want to just put

it behind me and never think about it

again

which in some cases

is the right thing to do

until i can figure it out until i can

figure out what what to do with that

experience in my life

but most of the time

it's best worked through it's best

thought about

shared with others etc and then learned

from it

so i wrote down some notes of things

that this meant to me

i wrote wisdom as a rule of thumb

is going to be what you perceive as

important

to leave your kids as knowledge and

teaching

just as a simple layman's terms

definition of what is

wisdom to me it's what life has taught

me

because

like knowledge is different

knowledge i can pick up from a book

knowledge i can hear somebody

talk about

but for it to become wisdom i have to

use it i have to experience it i have to

learn from something that's happened

then it becomes wisdom to me

and for me to consider it wisdom though

it has to be something important that i

deem

valid enough

to teach it to somebody else like my son

or my daughters

i think that a lot of times i thought

wisdom was some mystical thing

i thought it was just some biblical

thing

i thought it was just something that

monks had and

old people

people with a lot better connection to a

higher power than me

when really it turns out that it's just

my experiences put to good use

just an understanding of a larger plan

it's like the difference

between

somebody telling you what they're gonna

do

to a house

and then laying out the plans on a table

and you able to see all of it

come together as a larger plan

as a larger concept with the pictures

and the little drawings of the trees and

all the little things that

that make an idea into a vision

that's the difference between knowledge

and wisdom

to just to see how everything connects

when you make that connection between

your past

and what you need for your future

that's the wisdom that you carry along

so how does that relate to

step four and five

it's very closely related

because

in order to gain that wisdom in order to

accept that teaching

from my experiences

i have to look inward at the things that

have happened

i have to be honest about

my part in things

but more than that because a

self-appraisal is rarely enough

i also have to share it with another

and get their view on it their take on

it

and there's something that happens

when i go back and i

put everything on paper

and then i say it out loud

i always tend to

elaborate a little bit more

memories come up

feelings get translated in that talking

to another

and inevitably somewhere in that

conversation the other person will be

like

do you think that maybe

this and this and this could be causing

this and this and this

and you have that aha moment

and boom that's the wisdom

that's that little nugget you take

and you set aside you say okay

i know when this and this happens in my

life

i've always translated it to this other

thing

and i need to make this connection

in a different way

and that's the wisdom

that's the process

so i look inward

i share it outward

and i take other people's opinions about

what i share

and i let all those things

brew together

and what results of that whole process

is healing

it's acceptance

it's the breaking of chains

that have held me it's

resentments melting away

it's realizations that i was at fault

and things that i didn't realize i was

at a fault at

and sometimes more importantly it's the

realization that i'm not

responsible for some of the things that

have happened

so i look at this and i'm like

if this is how i gain wisdom

what i've learned from this whole little

thought process

is that i have to take what's in my past

communicate it

be open

to hearing somebody else's view on it

and then meditate on it

not forget about it like i used to

not push it aside not cover it up with

drugs

but see it as an opportunity

to learn and move forward

so i was kind of mulling that over and

i'm like

what's one thing that i would want to

pass on

one little bit of wisdom that i've

learned

in sobriety

because of my background because of what

i've been through

and to my surprise

what came up was this

is there's three things that i must not

ever give up on

first one is god

the second one

is myself

and the third one is love

and it's these three because they're so

interconnected

they're so dependent on each other

they're symbiotic they require each

other to work

because you can go at the lowest level

of that

or highest level depending on how you

look at it a belief in god a belief in a

higher power whatever you want to name

it

that's important but it always fails

when i don't believe in myself

because if i don't believe in myself

then how can god love me

and if god loves me then it goes back

how can i love myself

but there's love

there

at the lowest level

what if i give up on love what if i

experience something in my childhood

that

makes me feel like i was unloved

makes me give up

on people that say i love you because

the people that said i love you did

horrible things

so if i give up on love

i don't know how to love myself i don't

know how to be accepting of myself

and it's just this nasty cycle and we've

all seen it we've all seen this horrible

cycle

with abuse

to a child

you abuse a child in any way

they lose that self-confidence they lose

that

nurturing belief

in love

and then they lose

faith

that there's a god that loves them

but on the restoration side of that

there's a solution there too

if i'm willing to just

be open to the idea

that there is a loving god that there is

a loving higher power

then just maybe

somebody loves me and cares about me

and if somebody a higher power

loves me and cares about me then i have

worth

and if i have worth

then other people have worth

and if other people have worth then i'm

able to give my one true gift that i can

give in life which is love the caring

for another person

in any way

so just like it's broken down with one

little piece

of my history as a child

it can be built back up with one little

piece

as an adult

that very first thought that maybe

there's a higher power that cares about

me

so that's why it's important to me

the one little bit of wisdom that i

would like to pass on is that you can't

ever give up on god

you can't ever give up on yourself

and you can't ever give up on love

and i think i'm just gonna leave it

right there

that's all i have for you today

thank you for tuning in

being a part of my life being a part of

my recovery

you guys have a good one