The video showing the paint I pirated. Art & Qualm II
A kid says to a pirate, "Hey, Mister Pirate, why do you have a wooden leg?"
The pirate says, "OH, I was made to walk the plank, and a shark got me leg before I could get to land."
"Wow!" the kid says. "Hey, how did you get that hook for a hand?"
"Well," says the pirate, "We were boarding a Limey ship, and one of the sailors took my hand with his sword. Before he lost his life to my cutlass."
"Wow. Mr. Pirate, why do you have a patch on your eye?"
"Oh. That." says the pirate. "That was the first day with my new hook."