We've been discussing the concept Hakarat HaTov as a practice and introduction for Pesach. As we said, the night of the Seder is all about Hakarat HaTov/ recognition and gratitude to Hashem, for all He has done for us. Everything that we need to know, we learn from our Torah and the way the rabbis set up our prayers and the Haggadah shel Pesach. There's a famous part of the Haggadah that many people sing: Dayenu : Dayenu means it's enough . Of course it doesn't mean it's enough . We go through the 15 things, such as “ It's enough if we would have gotten out of Mitzrayim and not received the Torah.” But that is not enough . So what does Dayenu mean? The answer is, it's enough to say Thank You . Each one of these things, on its own, would be enough to make a party, to have a celebration, to show gratitude. And then, after we go through each one of the 15 things, we say, “ And even more so doubled and quadrupled,” and then we list all 15 together. And the purpose of all of this is to teach us an important lesson in Hakarat HaTov. There was a young man, newly married,who came to Rabbi Yehuda Ades complaining that his mother in law was impossible. “ She demands recognition for everything.” Rabbi Ades asked for an example, and he said, “ If she makes a salad, she makes a big deal about it. Like if I don't say thank you about the salad, I get a comment of something” So Rabbi Ades said, “ Okay, let's figure out what it is to make a salad.” He went with the boy to the vegetable market and they picked out the ripest tomatoes, and cucumbers and lettuce. Then they discussed that they’d have to check the lettuce for bugs and dice it. Then they had to decide which salad dressing to make, squeeze the lemons, add the olive oil etc. They discussed the whole process needed to make the salad. And Rabbi Ades said, “ You see, salad is not as simple as you think it is. And that's just the salad. Think about the roast and on and on. Each dish, on its own, would be enough to say thank you. And she put that all together to make the meal!” And this is important to consider, foremost with Hashem but with people as well. Because, as it says, Whoever denies the goodness of others will eventually deny the goodness of God. That's human nature. Either we recognize and delve and be grateful, or we're entitled and we take everything for granted, whether it's God or people. We can apply this to our own bodies. We can say, “ If I was able to see, that would be enough to say thank you. If I was able to hear, that would be enough to say thank you... If I were able to smell, that would be able enough to say thank you. If I were able to taste, that would be enough to say thank you… To walk, that enough needs a thank you. If you're able to think…” Think of each one of these on its own, and then put it all together. Wow! And again, we take it to people. It's an opportunity. Ladies work hard for Pesach. Go through, separately, everything they've done… the cooking, the cleaning, the baking, et cetera. And that's for one meal. Think of two, three and four and five and six and seven and eight. And a man works hard too, bringing home the parnasa to pay for everything. It's all about this principle of Hakara, to recognize. When you start to recognize, you begin to recognize every detail. That's why the writer of the Haggadah trained us in this important technique called “ Dayenu/It would be enough.” We can't stress this enough. The Gemara discusses this, regarding Shalom Bayit. There was a rabbi who had a wife that was very difficult. Whatever he asked for, she would give him the opposite. If he asked for cold cereal for breakfast, he’d get hot. If he asked for hot, he’d get cold. She was obviously a difficult woman. Yet, when he went to a wedding or a party, he could always be seen wrapping up a dessert, something that she would like, to bring home for her (which is a good practice). Somebody asked him what was going on, and his answer was this magical word, Dayenu . “ It's enough that she saves me from sin and she takes care and raises my children .” That's enough. That's enough for me to be indebted to her. Everything else after that is a luxury . It's added to the basic model. That's the principle of Dayenu . What exactly are we entitled to? Even within a relationship like marriage, what's extra? Recognize each Dayenu on its own. That's a great technique. Dayenu . If my wife shops for my children, Dayenu . If she keeps the house clean, Dayenu . If she arranges the trip, Dayenu , and so on and so on and so on. And again, husbands as well. That is our job. The job of Dayenu in Hakarat HaTov.