Every mind contemplates it. At first I posted then, then pulled it because I felt hesitant about posting it, then I said, (F#k that!) It's how I feel and I'm not going to be apologetic for how I'm feeling. And (F#K you!) if you have a problem with it.

Since I keep most intimate thoughts like this to myself, this is a way to exorcise those demons. It's a form of catharsis, like shouting at the moon.

I certainly feel better afterwards. And if the Native American seniors knew when it was their time to walk into the forest to never return, there is no reason why I shouldn't know also.

Once my debts are paid, if it is deemed possible, and once I have the means, then I'd like to go out by my choice. I'm looking at five or so years from now, but yeah. I'm not going to waste away in some senior living facility somewhere. Heck, I couldn't even afford it.

So, if the honest talk of suicide makes you uncomfortable, then skip over this episode.

---

Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/draeko/support