Half-Arsed History: Recent Episodes

Riley Knight

Welcome along to Half-Arsed History! It's a weekly podcast highlighting absurd and entertaining stories from history. For around half an hour a week, it also makes your host Riley Knight feel as though his useless history degree has some kind of real-world relevance.

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In this week’s episode, continue to learn the history of cricket, from its rise as an international sporting competition across the late 19th century to the popular, professional sport it is today.

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In this week’s episode, learn about the early origins of cricket, and its development from an informal childrens’ game to a major sport played across the world, throughout the British Empire.

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In this week’s episode, get across the history of Christmas, from its emergence as an early Christian festival co-opting existing celebrations, to the massive, worldwide event it is today.

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In this week’s episode, meet the famed explorer Sir Ernest Shackleton, who led the ill-fated Imperial Trans-Antarctic Expedition into the Antarctic.

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In this week’s episode, meet five famous animals who have all served in the military: Cher Ami the pigeon, Wojtek the bear, Simon the cat, Reckless the pony, and William the goat.

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In this week’s episode, get to know the US civil rights activise Rosa Parks, who made a stand for justice when she refused to give up her seat on a racially-segregated bus.

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In this week’s episode, learn all about the history of ancient Roman gladiators: who they were, how they trained and fought, and what happened to them when they won or lost.

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In this week’s episode, meet Sir Donald Bradman, who was undoubtedly the best cricketer in history and might just be the best sportsperson to have lived.

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In this week’s episode, get to know four of the worst president in the history of the United States of America: John Tyler, James Buchanan, Andrew Johnson, and Warren G. Harding.

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In this week’s episode, learn about three of the most controversial presidential elections in US history and the root cause behind them: the broken Electoral College system.

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In this week’s episode, get to know Artur Virgilio Alves Reis and hear about the incredible fraud he undertook in 1924, scamming his way into 100 million Portuguese escudos.

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In this week’s episode, meet Johann Strauss II, a brilliant composer from the Romantic period, famous for his lively and joyful waltzes.

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In this week’s episode hear the true story of the Great Escape, when Allied prisoners of war made a daring attempt at a mass breakout from a Nazi prison camp.

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In this week’s episode, conclude the story of the Crusades, with a collection of ridiculous tales from the five later campaigns waged by Christians seeking to conquer Jerusalem.

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If you found out about Half-Arsed History through Red Bull Wololo: El Reinado, I have some good news for you – this show is filled with episodes that cover some of your favourite campaigns from Age of Empires II. I’ve listed them all here, divided by expansion, so you can listen to them at your leisure.

The Age of Kings

  • Episode 109: William Wallace (Spotify • iTunes)
  • Episode 114: Joan of Arc (Spotify • iTunes)
  • Episode 201: Saladin (Spotify • iTunes)
  • Episodes 206 & 207: Genghis Khan (Spotify • iTunes)
  • Episode 225: Barbarossa (Spotify • iTunes)

The Conquerors

  • Episode 169: Attila the Hun (Spotify • iTunes)
  • Episode 157: El Cid (Spotify • iTunes)
  • Episode 127: Montezuma (Spotify • iTunes)
  • Episodes 13 & 14: Tours (Spotify • iTunes)
  • Episode 76: Hastings (Spotify • iTunes)
  • Episode 88: Agincourt (Spotify • iTunes)
  • Episode 63: Noryang (Spotify • iTunes)

The Forgotten

  • Episode 30: Vlad Dracula (Spotify • iTunes)

Rise of the Rajas

  • Episode 192: Le Loi (Spotify • iTunes)

The Last Khans

  • Episode 226: Pachacuti (Spotify • iTunes)

Dawn of the Dukes

  • Episode 168: Jadwiga (Spotify • iTunes)
  • Episode 224: Jan Zizka (Spotify • iTunes)

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In this week’s episode, learn about the first three of the crusades undertaken by armed Christian pilgrims, seeking to bring the Holy Land under Christian rule.

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This week's monument is the Palace of Westminster, the home of the British Parliament, and its famous clock tower, often (incorrectly) referred to as Big Ben.


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Quarter-Arsed History presents: the Six O'Clock Swill, a name given to the backfired attempt that temperance laws made to curb Aussie and Kiwi alcohol consumption.


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In this week’s episode, get across the history of the Australian city of Melbourne, recorded live at the Alex Theatre in Melbourne itself.

Here is a PDF of the slides used during the show: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1CAi-OaBkp8SKreGQyBpawg3YyHvgrT-R/view

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In this week’s episode, get across the history of the Australian city of Sydney, recorded live at the Factory Theatre in Sydney itself.

Here is a PDF of the slides used during the show: https://drive.google.com/file/d/19mUubwXufZeVjq9Z_uRnqF1kdBUDG3Jj/view

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In this week’s episode, hear the tale of the Battle of the Teutoberg Forest, and understand why it such a monumentally important event in human history.

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In this week’s episode, meet Elizabeth I, one of the most famous and important monarchs in English and British history, whose legacy helped to build modern English culture, language, and politics

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In this week’s episode, hear the history of the construction of the Panama Canal, which links the Pacific and Atlantic Oceans across Central America.

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Quarter-Arsed History presents: the origin of the teddy bear, the children's stuffed toy which got its name after a presidential hunting trip in 1902, when Theodore Roosevelt refused to shoot a bear.


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In this week’s episode, continue to get to know Theodore Roosevelt by hearing all about his foreign policy and evaluate his lasting legacy as president of the US.

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Quarter-Arsed History presents: the Leicester Balloon Riot, an incident that saw tens of thousands of angry people cause a ruckus because they thought a hot air balloon wasn't as big as they were hoping it would be.

Tickets for Half-Arsed History Live are available here: https://premier.ticketek.com.au/shows/show.aspx?sh=HALFHIST24


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In this episode, meet Theodore Roosevelt, and hear about his rise to the office of US president as well as his administration’s overwhelmingly positive domestic legacy.

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In this week’s episode, conclude the history of the modern Olympic Games, covering their story from the beginning of the post-war period through to the present day.

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In this week’s episode, disocver the first half of the history of the Modern Olympic Games, from its inception as a brainchild of Pierre de Coubertin to the interruptions the Games experienced as a result of the Second World War.

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In this week’s episode, hear about all the major assassination attempts that have been made on presidents of the United States, both successful and unsuccessful.

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In this week’s episode, learn the truth behind five more commonly-held historical misonceptions: the colour of classical statues, things erroneously associated with Julius Caesar, the existence of the iron maiden, Napoleon’s height, and NASA’s million-dollar space pen.

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In this week’s episode, discover the story of the Rosetta Stone, a series of 2,000-year-old texts written that became the key to our modern understanding of the Ancient Egyptian language.

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Half-Arsed History is taking to the stage this August, in Melbourne and Sydney! We’ll have a great time getting across the histories of these two cities, and there’s plenty of other stuff planned – Q&As, meet and greets, tour merch, a song or two, all sorts of things. Hope to see you there!

Tickets are on sale now: https://premier.ticketek.com.au/shows/show.aspx?sh=HALFHIST24

.

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Half-Arsed History is taking to the stage this August, in Melbourne and Sydney! We'll have a great time getting across the histories of these two cities, and there's plenty of other stuff planned - Q&As, meet and greets, tour merch, a song or two, all sorts of things. Hope to see you there!

Tickets go on sale at 10am AEST on the 4th of July: https://premier.ticketek.com.au/shows/show.aspx?sh=HALFHIST24


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In this week’s episode, meet Frédéric Chopin, one of the most famous and celebrated composers and pianists of the Romantic Era, and learn about his life, work, and relationships.

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In this week’s episode, learn the incredible story of Alan Turing – a man who not only laid the foundations of modern computer science, but also had an immense impact on the Second World War due to his work in deciphering the Enigma code.

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Quarter-Arsed History presents: the time Mark Thatcher, the son of a sitting UK prime minister, decided he wanted to be a racecar driver and got stranded in the middle of the Sahara Desert.


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In this week’s episode, get to know Christina of Sweden, the keenly intelligent and fiercely independent queen of Sweden, who is remembered today for her passion of learning and knowledge.

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In this week's episode, discover the story of one of the greatest Roman emperors ever to have lived: Trajan, who brought the empire to its largest territorial extent in 117 CE.


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This week's monument is Himeji Castle, a complex in Japan that is perhaps the finest and most magnificent example of Japanese castle-building.


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Quarter Arsed History presents: a brief history of the State of Origin, an very popular rugby league series that sees representatives from Queensland and New South Wales face off every year.


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In this week’s episode, learn all about Oscar Wilde, the famous Anglo-Irish playwright who is still remembered for his dazzling wit, and hear the tragic tale of his downfall due to the harsh social attitudes of the time.

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In this week’s episode, listen to the tale of the assassination of Abraham Lincoln, when actor John Wilkes Booth shot the sitting US president in Ford’s Theatre.

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In this week’s episode, conclude an overview of US history with the last of a four-part series, this week getting across the radical changes that took place in post-war USA, with things like the Cold War, the Civil Rights Movement, and the War on Terror.

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This week's monument is the Louvre Palace, a building in Paris, France that is today home to what is today the world's most famous art museum, but used to be a royal residence for French kings.


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Quarter-Arsed History presents: the Harlem Hellfighters, the nickname given to the US 369th Infantry Regiment, a unit of mostly African-American soldiers sent over to Europe to fight in the First World War.


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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, get stuck into the third of four episodes covering the history of the United States of America, this time covering the Reconstruction and Progressive Eras, the World Wars, Great Depression, and New Deal.

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This week's monument is Notre-Dame de Paris, one of the most famous Gothic-style cathedrals on the face of the planet.


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Quarter-Arsed History presents: the story of Ea-Nasir, a copper merchant whose reputation as a shonky businessman has lasted almost 3,800 years.


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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, continue an overview of US history, focussing on the first half of the 19th century: foreign policy, westward expansion, slavery, and the American Civil War.

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This week's monument is Angkor Wat, an enormous Buddhist temple complex found in Cambodia that is said to be the largest religious structure in the world.


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Quarter-Arsed History presents: the day John Sattler broke his jaw, when during the 1970 NSWRFL grand final, the South Sydney played through the entire match even after having his jaw broken in three places.


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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the first of a four-part series on the history of the United States of America, including its indigenous peoples, the colonisation process, the American Revolutionary War, and its immediate consequences.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the first of a four-part series on the history of the United States of America, including its indigenous peoples, the colonisation process, the American Revolutionary War, and its immediate consequences.


Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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This week's monument is Great Zimbabwe, a mediaeval city in Zimbabwe that generated great wealth and prosperity before ultimately falling into decline and ruin in the 15h century.


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Quarter-Arsed History presents: Simpson and his donkey, the tale of the brave Anzac John Simpson who rescued his wounded comrades from the battlefields of Gallipoli with the help of a donkey.


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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, find out about the ill-fated Gallipoli Campaign of the First World War and the role the ANZACs played in it, resulting in the yearly observance of Anzac Day.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tale of Owain Glyndŵr, a Welsh nobleman who led a rebellion against the English in the 14th century.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tragic tale of the dodo, and how it was driven to extinction by humans after we landed on the island of Mauritius.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the historical origins behind five popular sayings: “mad as a hatter”, “bite the bullet”, “crocodile tears”, “I have a bridge to sell you”, and “baker’s dozen”.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, get across a history of history itself, exploring the way we have recorded our own history over the millennia, how our relationship with history has changed, and how it has changed us.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the true story of William Adams, the inspiration behind the popular TV show Shogun and his fictional counterpart, John Blackthorne.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tale of the Irish noblewoman, rebel, and pirate, Grace O’Malley, known in Irish as Gráinne Ní Mháille.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, go on a journey through the history of chess, from its origins as an Indian board game called chaturanga, through its development in Persia and the Middle East, to become the international game it is today.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tale of the famous Portuguese explorer Vasco da Gama, whose mixed historical legacy includes being in command of the first successful sea voyage from Europe to Asia.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn all about the Anarchy, a devastating civil war that took place in 12th-century England in the wake of a succession crisis.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover the mystery of a forgotten technology, an incendiary weapon that burnt even after being doused with water: Greek Fire.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear all about the Treaty of Waitangi – how and why it was written, translated, and signed, as well as the many important consequences it had for Aotearoa New Zealand.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn about the original inhabitants of Aotearoa New Zealand, the Māori, and how their way of lives changed and developed as they settled their homeland before encountering visitors from across the seas.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the incredible tale of Florence Nightingale, who not only founded the modern profession of nursing, but also had a significant influence on – of all things – the way we present data with graphs.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, go on a journey through the history of tennis, one of the modern world’s most popular professional sports and one that dates back almost a thousand years.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn about the history of an international relations theory known as the Democratic Peace Theory, which argues that democracies never go to war with one another.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn about the emperor Charlemagne, who had a foundational influence on the creation and development of modern Europe.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the tale of one of the most important scientific figures in human history: Charles Darwin, and his revolutionary theory on evolution.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the life story of one of the greatest monarchs ever to have lived: Brazil’s Pedro II the Magnanimous.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover the story behind one a longstanding diplomatic stoush between Greece and Britain, and the items that caused it: the Elgin Marbles.

NOTE: Sincere apologies for my frustratingly incorrect pronunciation of “Elgin”. I should have looked it up before I started recording, oops!

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, get across a condensed history of one of the richest and most powerful empires of the early modern period: the Mughal Empire.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the life story of the the celebrated French seer Nostradamus, and examine some of his more famous prophecies in more detail.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn the life story of the famous composer Johann Sebastian Bach while listening to some of his most enduring works – most of which you are already probably familiar with, even if you don’t realise it.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the remarkable tale of Kate Sheppard, who was instrumental in making Aotearoa New Zealand the first self-governing place on Earth to offer universal women’s suffrage to its populace.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, count down through the five longest-reigning sovereign monarchs in history, from ancient Maya city states to modern 21st-century kingdoms.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn the history of the celebration today known as Halloween, from its origin as a Christian festival for saints and martyrs to its modern Samhain-influenced incarnation.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the history of the Sicilian Mafia, the most famous criminal organisation in history, and hear about its spread from the island of Sicily across the world.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tale of Edmund Hillary and Tenzing Norgay, the first two people to be confirmed to have made it to the peak of the highest mountain on Earth, Mount Everest.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, find out about all the famous Australians represented on Australian banknotes: Banjo Paterson and Dame Mary Gilmore, Mary Reibey and John Flynn, David Ngunaitponi and Edith Cowan, and Dame Nellie Melba and Sir John Monash.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn more about the historical setting for the upcoming Assassin’s Creed Mirage: a tumultuous and chaotic time in Islamic history known as the Anarchy at Samarra.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tale of Edward “Blackbeard” Teach, who has gone on to become perhaps the most famous and well-known pirate in history.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn everything you need to know about Australian referendums – what they are, how they work, and what was involved with the most famous and important ones in Australian history.

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Quarter-Arsed History presents: the TRUTH about the Bermuda Triangle, the truth that THEY don't want you to know about all the MYSTERIOUS DISAPPEARANCES of planes and ships and people in this ONE SPECIFIC PART of the Atlantic Ocean. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover the tale of Catherine de’ Medici, an Italian noblewoman who rose to become the ruler of France during one of the most tumultuous periods in French history. 

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, enjoy another ten stories surrounding some of the most ridiculous and amusing deaths in history.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the stories behind the two deadliest volcanic eruptions in human history: the 1815 eruption of Mount Tambora, and the 1883 eruption of Krakatoa.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn about the monumental impact Henry VIII had on English history as a result of his many marriages, culminating in the establishment of the Church of England.

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Quarter-Arsed History presents: Jumbo the Elephant, who became the world's most famous elephant after a lifetime as a star attraction in zoos and circuses across Europe and North America. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tale of the Vasa, a heavily-armed 17th century Swedish warship that sank just minutes into its maiden voyage, but is today the best-preserved warship from that period.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, find out the truth about five of the biggest misconceptions in history, including the date of the signing of the Declaration of Independence, the visibility of the Great Wall of China from space, what ninja and vikings used to wear, and historical beliefs about the Earth being flat.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn how artificial light has helped to create and shape human civilisation, and how it has changed over the millennia - from fire to gas to electricity.

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Quarter-Arsed History presents: the Demon Core,a six-kilogram lump of plutonium that caused the first-ever lethal criticality accident, and then a second one when some reckless US scientists went back for a second helping of radiation poisoning. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the true story of the life and career of J. Robert Oppenheimer, the scientist principally responsible for bringing nuclear weapons into the world.

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Quarter-Arsed History presents: Bat Bombs, an actual, factual US military project run by a dentist, the goal of which was to drop incendiary bats on Tokyo during the Second World War. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover five historical figures with some of the strangest epithets you'll ever come across: Mithridates the Poison King, Charles the Bald, Ivaylo the Cabbage, Selim the Drunk, and Robert the Cuckhold.

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Quarter-Arsed History presents: Harald Bluetooth, a famed viking king who unified Denmark before going after Norway and the Holy Roman Empire, and whose name is now synonymous with connecting electronic devices wirelessly. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover the life story of one of the most famous vikings in history: Harald Hardrada, who attempted to reforge the North Sea Empire after spending his younger years in exile.

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Quarter-Arsed History presents: Violet Jessop, who not only survived the sinking of the RMS Titanic, but also the sinking of its sister ship the HMHS Brittanic, as well as surviving a collision aboard the RMS Olympic. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tale of Cnut the Great, who unified the thrones of Denmark, Norway, and England to create what is known to history as the North Sea Empire.

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Quarter-Arsed History presents: Hiroo Onoda, a Japanese guerilla fighter who continued to fight the Second World War on behalf of Japan for almost three decades after it finished. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn the full story of the famous ship RMS Titanic - a ship that was touted as being "unsinkable", right up until it sank on its maiden voyage across the Atlantic.

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Quarter-Arsed History presents: Operation Plumbbob, a series of nuclear tests that were carried out in the US in 1957, that involved test subjects such as buildings, aircraft, pigs, living servicemen - as well as creating what was at the time the fastest-moving human-made object in history. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tale of the second and third voyages of Captain James Cook, as he sailed in search of Terra Australis Incognita and the Northwest Passage.

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Quarter-Arsed History Presents: Blas de Lezo, the Spanish naval officer who lost a leg, arm, and an eye and still managed to be one of the greatest naval commanders Spain ever produced. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tale of the first voyage undertaken by Captain James Cook, the first recorded instance of European contact with the east coast of Australia.

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Quarter-Arsed History presents: Iron Mike Malloy, a seemingly indestructible Irishman who survived several murder attempts as people attempted to cash in on his life insurance policies. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn about the time that a chariot race sparked a deadly revolt which almost brought down an emperor: the Nika Riots.

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Quarter-Arsed History presents: the Crash at Crush, an infamous publicity stunt where two trains were deliberately crashed into one another at high speed, with fatal results. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the life story of Hurrem Sultan, one of the most powerful women in Ottoman history and someone who paved the way for generations of women to play a huge role in the Ottoman Empire’s history.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tale of the pirate Henry Every, who pulled off what is perhaps the biggest and most profitable act of piracy in history – and got away with it.  

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the life story of one of the US’s most famous founding fathers – the writer, scientist, inventor, diplomat, statesman, and flatulence enthusiast, Benjamin Franklin

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tale of the Roman Empire – one of the most important and influential realms in human history that spanned from western Europe across the Middle East before its decline and ultimate collapse.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn the story of the Roman Republic – from its origins as a city-state, to its rise and expansion as a republic, through to its transition to an empire.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear about the last stand of the samurai in the Satsuma Rebellion, an enormously important turning point in Japanese history.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, enjoy the story of the time the Catholic Church ended up with three concurrent popes all vying for power: the Western Schism.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn the full story behind one of the most famous political conspiracies in history: the Gunpowder Plot, and its most famous conspirator, Guy Fawkes

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the third part of the history of flight: how the Second World War changed aviation forever, the breaking of the sound barrier, the development of the jet engine, and more.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the second part of the history of flight: the lead-up to successful heavier-than-air flight, how it was first achieved, and how it spread and changed in the early 20th century.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the first part of the history of flight: the origins of humanity’s attempts to take to the skies, with wings, ornithopters, hot air balloons, and airships.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the ridiculous tale of Antonio Lopez de Santa Anna, who served as the president of Mexico eleven times, and did a pretty terrible job at it.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover the truth behind the famous Salem Witch Trials, a defining moment in American colonial history.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn the story of Fritz Haber, a man whose monumental scientific breakthrough prevented a global catastrophe, and how he sabotaged his own legacy with enthusiasm for war and death.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, enjoy the tale of the bloodiest mutiny in British naval history, the mutiny on the Hermione, and the daring operation undertaken to return it to British hands. 

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, find out who won the race to the North Pole, and hear about all the controversies and disputes involved with various attempts that were made to be the first to reach it.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, get across ten more ridiculous stories that led to some of the weirdest deaths in history.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover how the Commonwealth of Australia was created through federation, bringing six separate colonies together as one new nation.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn why Australia Day, the 26th of January, isn’t a date worth celebrating while uncovering the full story of the colonisation of Australia.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover the life story of one of ancient Egypt’s most successful and famous pharaohs: Hatshepsut, whose great buildings are still standing today.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, enjoy some of the ridiculous stories involved with when famous pieces of artwork have been stolen: the funniest art heists in history

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the second part of the life story of Frederick Douglass, and the influence he had on the progress of US history as a speaker, writer, abolitionist, and statesman.

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Hello exalted listeners,

I’m currently having a bunch of issues with the distribution of recent episodes. This is due to the general podcast architecture that delivers episodes to your chosen platform each week, and also my lack of foresight when it came to scaling the show. The show is now so big that my original hosting platform, WordPress, is completely unable to keep up, and so things are falling apart a bit – hence the issues you’ve been having.

I really am very sorry about this. I know disruptions and disturbances to the weekly routine of listening to a podcast are extremely frustrating, and I’m doing everything I can to fix it. The primary issue is that I need to verify ownership of the old RSS feed, in order to point traffic in the right direction – but I no longer have access to the old feed after having moved from WordPress to Anchor. I’ve emailed Google Podcasts, the primary culprit in serving the old, incorrect feed, and hopefully they’ll be swift to fix things.

In the meantime, there are a few things you can do to continue accessing the show:

  1. Change podcast platforms, if only for a little while, to one that is being served the correct feed. Anything that feeds from Spotify or iTunes will work.
  2. Download the show’s .mp3 and .mp4 files directly from this website using the download links, and play them locally from your device.
  3. Sit tight and wait for the issue to be resolved, which should mean the show works properly on your chosen app. I can’t give a timeline for this; it’s largely out of my hands.

Again, I’m really sorry that your access to the show has been disrupted and I’m trying to get it fixed as soon as possible. Thanks for your patience in the meantime. If you have any other perspectives or advice, please use the contact form to get in touch, or join the discussion we’ve been having about the issues on my Discord server: http://bit.ly/joinrileysdiscord – look for the #hah-discussion channel.

Cheers everyone – hopefully I’ll have this fixed soon!

Riley

https://explosivesinthecargohold.files.wordpress.com/2022/12/hah-apology.mp3

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover the first part of the life story of Frederick Douglass, a remarkable man who began life enslaved before making a daring and dangerous escape to a life of freedom as an author, speaker, statesman, and political activist. 

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the story of the most ridiculous World Cup in soccer’s history – which also happens to be the first one ever held, the 1930 FIFA World Cup

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, listen to the conclusion of the story of Japan's great unifiers, with the tale of Tokugawa Ieyasu, who forged the mighty Tokugawa Shogunate.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, continue the tale of the unification of Japan with the life of Toyotomi Hideyoshi, the second of the great unifiers.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the life story of Oda Nobunaga, known as the first great unifier, a man whose actions changed the course of Japanese history.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn the histories of the six smallest nations on Earth: Liechtenstein, San Marino, Tuvalu, Nauru, Monaco, and the Vatican City.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the story of the famous traitor Benedict Arnold, who betrayed the rebellious Continental Army during the American Revolutionary War and fought instead for the British.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover the tale of Isabella I of Castile, a remarkably important figure in both Spanish and world history, who oversaw the unification of the Spanish Kingdom and the creation of the Spanish Empire.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the story behind the formation of the Inca Empire, and the man behind its creation: Pachacuti Inca, who built one of the most remarkable empires the world has seen.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the story of one of the great mediaeval leaders, Frederick Barbarossa of the Holy Roman Empire, who spent his entire reign fighting to keep his realm together. 

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn about the Czech general and national hero, Jan Zizka, who used a combination of military innovation and strategic genius while fighting in the Hussite Wars.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the story of the Hundred Years’ War, a famous mediaeval conflict that saw five generations of English and French kings fight over claims to the French throne for over a hundred years.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the moment in history generally considered to be the end of the mediaeval period: the Fall of Constaninople, when a 21-year-old Ottoman Sultan captured the ancient city of Constantinople.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tale of King Charles I of England, one of the worst monarchs in English and British history, who ended up so unpopular that he ended up having his head chopped off. 

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Half Arsed History has been invited to submit an application to be considered for the Best History Podcast at the Australian Podcast Awards this November! I need your help to do this - they want three to five clips showcasing the best of the show between Episodes 162 and 214 inclusive, so who better to ask than the exalted listeners of the show itself!

If you have the time and the inclination, I would greatly appreciate it if you could head to halfarsedhistory.net and use the contact form to submit the episode name, number, and timestamp where I can find a moment from the show that you loved, whether it was funny or entertaining or informative, so I can put together the submission. You can send through multiple moments - the more the better!

Find out more about the awards here: https://australianpodcastawards.com/

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the second half of the life story of Mahatma Gandhi, who led India towards its ultimate independence with satyagraha, his political philosophy of nonviolent resistance.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the first half of the story of Mahatma Gandhi, who started off a painfully shy law student before fighting against racial discrimination in South Africa, and for political independence in India. 

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover the tale of a pioneering aviator, Amelia Earhart, who set countless records as a talented aviator and determined adventurer.

https://halfarsedhistory.files.wordpress.com/2022/08/218-amelia-earhart.mp3

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn the story behind a device that changed the world forever, and the man who invented it: Johannes Gutenberg, and the monumentally important printing press.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the tale of Isaac Newton, one of the most important figures in scientific history, who produced incredible, groundbreaking work that laid bare some of the fundamental laws of the universe. 

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, listen to the tale of Hammurabi, an ancient Mesopotamian king who instituted one of the most important and influential code of laws in human history.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the life story of the man who forged history's first-ever empire, Sargon of Akkad, and his efforts to maintain and develop it across his time as emperor.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn the life story of the Venezuelan freedom fighter and revolutionary hero, Simon Bolivar, who liberated half a continent from Spanish colonial rule. 

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the second half of the story of Napoleon Bonaparte, including his domestic reforms that would influence the entire world, and his eventual downfall, brief return, and final exile.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the first half of the story of Napoleon Bonaparte, the famous French commander and emperor, who forged the French Empire by conquering half of the European continent. 

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn about the later stages of Galileo Galilei's career, and how the legendary scientist ran afoul of the Catholic Church due to his far-sighted genius. 

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the first half of the life story of Galileo Galilei, one of the most important and influential scientists in human history, who made far-sighted, ground-breaking scientific discoveries that changed our understanding of the universe. 

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the tale of Queen Victoria of the United Kingdom, who was in her time the longest-reigning monarch in British history. 

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the second half of the life story of Genghis Khan, the man who created the Mongolian Empire and led it to early greatness as it expanded across Asia and into Europe. 

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover the first half of the life story of Genghis Khan, the man who forged the largest contiguous empire that history has ever seen. 

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tale of the famous Roman general and statesman, Julius Caesar, who played an instrumental role in the transition between the Roman Republic and Roman Empire.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn about the life and times of the famous Renaissance man Leonardo da Vinci, whose genius encompassed everything from art to engineering, anatomy to aerodynamics, and much more besides.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tale of one of the most important literary figures in human history: William Shakespeare, who changed the English language forever with his poems and plays.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover the life story of one of the greatest conquerors the world has ever seen: Alexander the Great, who in his short life forged a huge empire that spanned from Egypt to India.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tale of the mighty Saladin, the Kurdish sultan who united much of the 12th century Muslim world and recaptured Jerusalem, triggering the Third Crusade.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tale of the mighty Saladin, the Kurdish sultan who united much of the 12th century Muslim world and recaptured Jerusalem, triggering the Third Crusade.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn about the disastrous Battle of Karansebes, the speedy surgeon Robert Liston, the Pig War (which hardly features any pigs at all), the submarine H.L. Henley which was very good at half its job, the broadsword-wielding Fighting Jack Churchill, and the fraternal rivalry that led to the establishment of both Adidas and Puma.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn about the disastrous Battle of Karansebes, the speedy surgeon Robert Liston, the Pig War (which hardly features any pigs at all), the submarine H.L. Henley which was very good at half its job, the broadsword-wielding Fighting Jack Churchill, and the fraternal rivalry that led to the establishment of both Adidas and Puma.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the story of one of Georgia's greatest monarchs: the female king, Tamar the Great.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the story of one of Georgia's greatest monarchs: the female king, Tamar the Great.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tale of the Cuban Missile Crisis, one of the closest points humanity ever came to global thermonuclear war.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tale of the Cuban Missile Crisis, one of the closest points humanity ever came to global thermonuclear war.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover the history of one of the 20th century's most important technological developments that would go on to shape history and modern current affairs: nuclear weapons.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover the history of one of the 20th century's most important technological developments that would go on to shape history and modern current affairs: nuclear weapons.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the second half of the tale of Bartholomew Roberts and his ultimate downfall and death, and learn about the role of things like the Jolly Roger during the Golden Age of Piracy.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the first half of the tale of Bartholomew Roberts, one of history's most successful pirates, and learn about other pirate-related topics such as various Pirate Codes that once governed different pirate ships.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover the life story of Ludwig van Beethoven, one of the greatest composers in history who created some of the most acclaimed and celebrated musical works, while suffering from debilitating hearing loss.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, go on a tour of the history of the land we today call Ukraine and the people that call it home, from Neolithic tribes to Slavic migrants, from Cossack freedom fighters to those subjugated by the Russian Empire, and discover some of the historical context to the horrendous and needless conflict taking place in Ukraine right now.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the tale of Le Loi, the Vietnamese national hero who delivered his people from the invading colonial Ming dynasty.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, continue to learn about the life and times of Cleopatra VII Philopator, who played a significant role in not only the governance of Egypt but also the fall of the Roman Republic and rise of the Roman Empire.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, get to know one of the most famous figures from ancient history, Cleopatra VII Philopator, and learn how in her younger days she secured her crown against her enemies and became close to Julius Caesar.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, get to know one of the most famous figures from ancient history, Cleopatra VII Philopator, and learn how in her younger days she secured her crown against her enemies and became close to Julius Caesar.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the hilarious and unbelievable story of the Capture of Guam, when a heavily-armed US naval convoy took control of the island of Guam from Spain - without shedding a single drop of blood.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover the incredible story of Operation Mincemeat, one of the most elaborate and unbelievable intelligence ruses in history.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tale of the Great Train Robbery, when in 1963 a group of gang members held up and robbed a mail train in England, before fleeing to their hideout and playing Monopoly with their ill-gotten gains.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn what happened during the decisive battles of Salamis and Plataea, when the Greeks finally gained the upper hand in the Greco-Persian Wars, and how these battles went on to affect the overall outcome of the war.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tale of the Battle of Thermopylae, when a small force of Greek hoplites held off and fought a brave last stand against an overwhelmingly large Persian army as part of the Greco-Persian Wars.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the story of the Battle of Marathon, a battle of immense importance not just in ancient history, but modern world history as well - and learn the true tale of the origin of the modern running race.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the ridiculous story of the 1908 New York to Paris Race, which involved everything from plans to drive across the sea, blatant and outright cheating, and one team even selling their racecar en route.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, begin to understand an important chapter in Ireland's tragic and complicated history: the Nine Years' War, which effectively brought about the end of an autonomous Gaelic Ireland.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn the incredible life story of Caravaggio, one of the most famous painters in history - he wasn't just a masterful artist, however, but a lifelong street brawler who got into all sorts of trouble for it throughout his entire life.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tale of Fritz Duquesne, a South African who throughout his adventure-filled life was a hunter, soldier, spy, writer, and... film publicist? whose lifelong hatred of the British saw him spy against them in both world wars.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the story behind Australia's first (and only) military coup, when William Bligh was overthrown as governor of New South Wales - the Rum Rebellion.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the rest of the life story of Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, how he set himself up as a successful performer and composer in Vienna, and discover his lifelong love of scatological humour.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the first half of the life story of Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, and his adventures as a child and young man as he travelled Europe, performing as a child virtuoso and honing his craft as a legendary composer.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover the story of Zoe and Theodora Porphyrogenita, two sisters who rose to power in the ruthless, cutthroat world of Byzantine politics.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the story of the richest man in ancient Rome, who was a real nasty piece of work: Marcus Licinius Crassus.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, be entertained with some morbid comedy with the stories of ten more weird and ridiculous deaths from across history.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the very entertaining last words of four figures from throughout history: Marie Antoinette, John Segwick, James W. Rodgers, and Ian Fleming.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the comedic tragedy - or is it the tragic comedy - of the Erfurt Latrine Disaster, when a huge group of mediaeval German lords plunged into a cesspit in the middle of meeting with a king.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn the story behind Sapa Inca Atahualpa and the Massacre of Cajamarca, the defining moment in the collapse of the mighty Inca Empire.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, find out about King Shaka kaSenzangakhona, also known as Shaka Zulu, a man who went from a common soldier to a tribal chieftain to one of southern Africa's most powerful warrior-kings.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tale of Attila the Hun, one of history's most fearsome and bloodthirsty warriors, who rampaged across both the Eastern and Western Roman Empires.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the life story of Jadwiga of Poland, a monarch who guided her realm through a turbulent and difficult period while maintaining peace and prosperity for her people.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tale of the first woman known to history to have circumnavigated the globe, Jeanne Baret, who went from being an impoverished peasant to a widely-travelled botanist and entrepreneur who made history with her voyages.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the life story of one of history's most famous con men, Charles Ponzi, whose name is still attached to the swindle he pulled off (but didn't invent!) in 1920, when he fleeced millions from people in the US.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the extraordinary tale of Wild Bill Hickok, a famous gunslinger and lawman from the American Old West, who - amongst much else - once shot a man dead over a gold pocketwatch.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn about the Time of Troubles, a period of Russian history brought about by a succession crisis that involved chaos, invasions, lawlessness, and three different blokes pretending to be a long-lost heir who had come back from the dead.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tale of Moondyne Joe, a convict sent to Western Australia who became infamous for his many attempts to break out of jail there, and the adventures he had along the way.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the history of the bicycle, and how it went from being a wooden-wheeled, bone-shaking daredevil's plaything to a wonderful machine that influenced historical political movements and changed the way we travel.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn the history of the ancient Olympic Games, which featured everything from naked foot races to bloodsports, and became the precursor to the modern Olympic Games we all know so well today.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover the full story of one of the biggest political scandals in recent memory - the Watergate Scandal, which brought low an entire presidential administration after a series of failed cover-ups.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn the long and surprisingly involved history of the Hudson's Bay Company - today a chain of department stores, but previously a fur trading company that became a foundationally important part of Canada.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover the history of the structures that became mediaeval Europe's military, political, economic, and administrative focal points: the castle, a fortified home for wealthy ruling nobles.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the story of Rodrigo Díaz de Vivar, better known to history as El Cid, a famous Spanish knight who fought for and against both Christians and Muslims in mediaeval Iberia.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover the bloody, decades-long feud between two rival Frankish queens from the Early Middle Ages, Brunhilda and Fredegund.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, be amazed at the ridiculous story of the Battle of Castle Itter, the only recorded time when American and German soldiers fought side-by-side in the Second World War.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the origin story of the modern state of Portugal, and the tale of the man who wrought its independence: Afonso I of Portugal.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the story of the Forty-Seven Ronin, a group of ex-samurai who hatched a two-year-long plot to avenge the death of their fallen lord and reclaim his lost honour.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tale of the Eureka Rebellion, the closest Australian colonists ever came to a full-scale political uprising after a harsh tax led gold miners to take up arms against the government.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn how the most significant medical breakthrough in human history - the discovery of penicillin - resulted in a revolution in human health thanks to the work of some talented and dedicated scientists.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the full story of the Apollo Program, the monumental scientific endeavour that successfully landed humans on the Moon for the first time.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear about the lives and the discoveries made by William and Caroline Herschel, a pair of siblings who were enormously influential on the science of astronomy.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the ancient tale of Ashurbanipal, who styled himself king of the universe, and how his legacy remains alive today almost three millennia after his death.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn the stories of the Servile Wars, three slave revolts from ancient Rome that led to the emergence of legendary figures such as Spartacus.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tragic tale of the whaleship Essex, the real-life inspiration for Herman Melville's Moby-Dick - a story of what happened when a giant whale attacked a ship in the middle of the Pacific.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the long and very interesting history of one of the world's most important waterways, the Suez Canal, and hear about just how many times it's been blocked up over the years.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn about all the ridiculous stories behind the times the CIA tried - and failed - to assassinate Fidel Castro, the president of Cuba.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the stories of the Four Great Inventions from ancient China, and how they've impacted the modern world: the compass, papermaking, woodblock printing, and gunpowder.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover the life story of Marie Sklodowska Curie, a brilliant pioneering scientist who faced significant challenges both inside and outside the lab - but one who still managed to be the first person ever to win two Nobel Prizes.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tale of Alcibiades: general, diplomat, politician, traitor and turncoat (more than a few times), and an absolute lothario, who influenced the course of the famous Peloponnesian War.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn the history of the infamous Lafitte Brothers, who were privateers, smugglers, political operatives, businessmen, spies, and all around rogues who made an unlikely alliance with the US to save New Orleans.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn the history of the humble toilet, and hear how it has developed over the years from a rudimentary necessity to something that has bolstered both public health and a lot of very highbrow humour.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the true story of the Order of Assassins, also known as the Nizari Ismaili, as they pursued their political and religious goals with fanatically loyal, murderous agents.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the story of Alexander Selkirk, a castaway whose incredible tale was one of the real-life inspirations for the famous novel Robinson Crusoe.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover the tale of King Ludwig II of Bavaria, who was responsible for securing a great cultural legacy for his kingdom - including the construction of the magnificent Neuschwanstein Castle.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the history of football, from its origins as an anarchic, violent game played by hundreds to the many various codes that have developed over the years.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the story of Eleanor of Aquitaine, one of the richest and most powerful women in mediaeval Europe, and learn how she helped to shape the history of both England and France as the queen of both nations.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, test the claim made earlier this week that the outgoing US presidency represents the "greatest first term ever" by examining every single first term of every single US president in history.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the rulers throughout history that had the shortest reigns - although not all of them are accepted, even the disputed ones make for some great stories.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tale of the Mongol Invasions of Japan, and the unlikely way in which the invasions ultimately failed.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the origins of four commonly-used modern sayings: "beyond the pale", "fiddling while Rome burns", "red herring", and "hoist with his own petard".

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn about an often (and perhaps readily) overlooked part of Australia's history - the racist immigration laws it upheld for much of its history that became known as the White Australia Policy.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear how the Aztec Empire was destroyed by Spanish invaders led by Hernan Cortes, and the tale of the emperor who was there when it fell, Moctezuma II.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tale of the Mesoamerican Triple Alliance - better known to history as the Aztec Empire - and meet one of the men instrumental in its rise, Moctezuma I.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, get across some of the weirdest and most ridiculous stories of how people have died, spanning from Ancient Greece to the modern era.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, be shocked at the murderous crimes of two profiteering maniacs, Burke and Hare, who killed their victims just to sell their corpses to anatomists.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn about the way that birth control has changed over the years, from Ancient Egyptian crocodile turds to the contraceptive pill of the modern era.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tale of one of history's best recorded witch trials, the Lancashire Witch Trials of 1612.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn of the time that raw sewage turned central London and the River Thames into a mephitic, malodorous hellscape - a time known as the Great Stink.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the second half of the life story of history's most famous philanderer - Giacomo Casanova.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, be amazed at the adventures and misadventures that during place during the early life of history's best-known philanderer - Giacomo Casanova.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the true story of two of the USA's most notorious and romanticised criminals: Bonnie Parker and Clyde Barrow.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, be mystified at the tale of Franklin's Lost Expedition, when two ships attempted to find their way through the Northwest Passage only to be lost forever.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the story of the disgraced samurai Hasekura Tsunenaga, who attempted to reclaim his family's honour by becoming the first ever Japanese ambassador to Europe.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the incredible tale of the Battle of Kadesh, and its direct consequence - the oldest peace treaty known to history.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the history of gunpowder, an invention that changed the nature of human conflict forever, influencing warfare and military technology for centuries.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the story of Joan of Arc, the famous French hero who changed the course of the Hundred Years War and went on to become a national symbol of France.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn about five of the shortest wars ever fought: The Serbo-Bulgarian War, the War of the Stray Dog, the Six-Day War, the Football War, and the Anglo-Zanzibar War.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn about four of the Seven Wonders of the Ancient World: the Statue of Zeus, the Mausoleum at Halicarnassus, the Colossus of Rhodes, and the Lighthouse of Alexandria.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn about three of the Seven Wonders of the Ancient World: the Great Pyramid at Giza, the Hanging Gardens of Babylon, and the Temple of Artemis at Ephesus.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the long and very interesting history of money, from its beginnings as commodity money, through coinage, paper money, fiat money, all the way to the digital money of the 21st century.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn the true story of the very famous Sir William Wallace, Guardian of Scotland and his role in the First War of Scottish Independence.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, be entertained with the story of the Shark Arm Murder, a tale of a murder investigation that was brought about when a captive tiger shark spewed up a tattooed human arm in 1930s Sydney.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the ridiculous story of the Münster Rebellion, which had everything from a crazed self-proclaimed prophet, to forced polygamy, to good old-fashioned blood and guts and 'orrible murder.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the adventures and misadventures involved with the very first circumnavigation of the Earth, a story closely associated with Portuguese explorer Ferdinand Magellan.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover the real story behind the famous duel between Alexander Hamilton and Aaron Burr - how their careers intertwined, how their rivalry developed, and what fatal consequences therefore resulted.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the life story of Joseph Bologne, Chevalier de Saint-Georges - who was born to an African slave but went on to become a musician, composer, swordsman, abolitionist, soldier, and revolutionary.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the mixed legacy of the Insurrection Act of 1807, a two-hundred-year-old piece of American legislation that has been used in the pursuit of both fair-minded justice and horrific oppression, firmly consigning those who invoked it either to the right or the wrong side of history.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, explore the more recent history of timekeeping and clocks, including John Harrison's marine chronometer, how wristwatches eclipsed pocketwatches, and finally how quartz and atomic watches brought us into the twenty-first century.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the first half of the very interesting history of the humble clock, from its origins as a sundial and water clock, through to the technological developments that led to the first mechanical clocks, pendulum clocks, and pocket watches.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn about Liechtenstein's weird involvement in the Austro-Prussian War, the mysterious Voynich Manuscript, the doomed romance of Peter I and Ines de Castro, Wilhelm Voigt's audacious heist, the untold riches of Mansa Musa I, the women in charge of Sydney's Razor Gangs, and the death-defying adventure of Alan Magee.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the story of coffee, one of the most popular drinks in the world, and hear how it was spread and popularised while influencing politics, history, economics, and of course culture.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the story of Ching Shih, one of the most powerful pirates the world has ever seen, who at her peak led a fleet of hundreds and a crew of tens of thousands.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, be amazed by the incredible exploits of "Colonel" Thomas Blood, a thief, kidnapper, con man, turncoat, impersonator, traitor, and rogue who attempted the heist of the century when he tried to steal the Crown Jewels of England.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, explore the bitter rivalry between Othniel Charles Marsh and Edward Drinker Cope, two palaeontologists whose undying hatred for one another resulted in the Bone Wars.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the story of the Mechanical Turk, a chess-playing automaton from over 250 years ago that stunned and mystified with its chess-playing skill and fiercely-guarded secrets.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the story of the Ten Thousand: "an epic tale of marooned Greek mercenaries in enemy territory, with betrayal and beheadings, a Persian brotherly blood feud, and a foot bridge made of slaughtered animal herds."

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, explore an interesting and overlooked bit of Cold War history - the Cod Wars, which helped to shape 20th century politics, geography, and British haute cuisine.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn the surprisingly interesting history of the humble potato, and how it has strongly influenced the course of history and made the world into what it is today.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the tragic story of Ignaz Semmelweis, a man whose pioneering medical work has saved millions of lives over the years - as well as being especially relevant today.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn about one of the most devastating diseases the world has ever seen - the Black Death, which killed countless millions of people and reduced Europe's population by up to sixty percent.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the life and times of Diogenes the Cynic, a famous Ancient Greek philosopher who was known for living in a jar, making a mockery of the establishment, and relieving himself in public.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn all about the English longbow, which played a decisive role in the military history of western Europe between the thirteenth and fifteenth centuries, and hear the stories of the battles in which it played a key role.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the life of Edward Jenner, a man who perhaps saved more lives than any other human in the history of our species by developing a vaccine for smallpox.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the story of Irene of Athens, who rose to rule the Byzantine Empire in her own right through a combination of political cleverness and brutal and bloody authority.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover the incredible exploits of the brazen sea captain Peter Tordenskjold, who fought for Denmark-Norway against the Swedish during the Great Northern War.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the ridiculous story of the Siege of Dunbar, where a Scottish noblewoman known as Black Agnes thoroughly humiliated her English foes as they laid siege to her castle.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn the tale of Johann Friedrich Struensee, who took control of the Kingdom of Denmark in the eighteenth century, by winning over the king and sleeping with the queen.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the remarkable tale of the Norwegian and Allied saboteurs who fought a secret and dangerous war against the Nazi nuclear weapons program during the Second World War.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover the remarkable true story of the Beast of Gévaudan, a monstrosity that plagued and terrorised the French countryside in the 1760s.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the life of Tycho Brahe, who balanced his astronomic and scientific genius with, like, just a whole bunch of really weird stuff.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the second half of the story of Operation Pastorius, when eight Nazi saboteurs were sent across the Atlantic in submarines to attempt to wreak havoc within the US.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the first half of the story of Operation Pastorius, when eight Nazi saboteurs were sent across the Atlantic in submarines to attempt to wreak havoc within the US.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the origin of one of the Seven Wonders of the World, the Mausoleum at Halicarnassus, and the woman who was behind its construction, Artemisia II of Caria.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the story of the Norman Conquest of England, an event which put a new line of kings on the throne of England and forever changed the course of world history.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover one of the most humiliating defeats ever suffered by the Australian Army - the Great Emu War, when artillerymen and machine guns from the Australian Army were deployed to fight tens of thousands of emus, and lost.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the story of the Mutiny on the Batavia, when a Dutch ship ran aground off the coast of Western Australia and ended up with a murderous psychopath in charge, resulting in treachery, betrayal, and of course 'orrible murder.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the hilarious and near-world-changing story of the USS William D. Porter, a ship whose crew almost accidentally killed US President Franklin Delano Roosevelt before suffering the weirdest kamikaze attack in history.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, find out the truth about the famous Battle of the Alamo and its role in securing Texan independence, as well as the stories of some of the famous men who were there, including Jim Bowie and Davy Crockett.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn the tale of Queen Nzinga, who spent a lifetime fighting against the Portuguese colonisation of Angola - and in doing so, united two kingdoms and made a name for herself as a clever, pragmatic, and ruthless leader.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the incredible story of the Dumas family, who for four consecutive generations produced a succession of "distinguished men" - a revolutionary general, a celebrated author, a talented playwright, and an Olympic double-gold medallist.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear more of the ridiculous stories that came out of the Eighty Years' War, including a sixteenth-century Trojan Horse story, the establishment of the Dutch East India Company, and the only time in history a Spanish treasure fleet was ever captured.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear some of the ridiculous stories that came out of the Eighty Years' War, including the surfing pirates of the Siege of Leiden, the tens of thousands left dead after the Spanish Fury, and William the Silent paying for his assassin's pistols.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover the incredible life story of Josephine Baker, who went from the slums of St. Louis to international stardom as a singer, while also working as a spy during the Second World War and a civil rights activist in the years afterwards.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, be amazed at the incredible exploits of Juan Pujol García, who went from being a Spanish chicken farmer to one of the most important double agents during the Second World War.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the amusing and tragic adventures of Tarrare, a French man who had perhaps the most voracious appetite the world has ever seen, eating everything from his own bodyweight in meat to wood and rocks.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn the story of John Paul Jones, a daring naval commander whose early victories against the British during the American Revolutionary War earnt him the title "Father of the US Navy".

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover the tale of Admiral Yi Sun-Sin, one of the greatest naval strategists the world has ever seen, who never lost a battle or even a ship at sea throughout his entire career.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, enjoy the uplifting story of James Lind, a medical visionary who was ahead of his time in helping to cure scurvy and conducting what might have been the world's first clinical trial.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, try to contain your bewilderment as you hear the story of John R. Brinkley, a man who made his fortune by transplanting goat testicles into humans after marketing them as a miracle cure-all.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn how Alexander the Great besieged Tyre, with hundreds of ships and a human-made causeway, altering not only the course of world history but also the course of world geography.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the story of Neutral Moresnet, a fascinatingly unique geographical and political anomaly in 19th-century Europe, famous for zinc mining, smuggling, gambling, and Esperanto.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, be shocked at the debauchery of Elagabalus, who ruled Rome as emperor during the third century with some and gained an outrageous reputation for salaciousness and promiscuity.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, enjoy the life story of the gentleman pirate Stede Bonnet, who left behind a life of comfortable wealth to take to the seas as a pirate in the Golden Age of Piracy.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the incredible life of Robert Smalls, who went from being born into slavery to becoming a war hero and a congressman, securing his freedom by stealing a Confederate gunboat.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, be amazed at one of the most brazen and audacious confidence tricks in history - the Poyais Scheme, run by Gregor MacGregor, who invented an entire country and swindled people into investing in and emigrating to it.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the wild soldiering career of the famous swindler Gregor MacGregor, who talked his way into (and out of) all sorts of wild adventures while fighting for various Latin American independence movements.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, be entertained by the wild life story of Julie d'Aubigny - better known as La Maupin - who was a swordfighting, convent-burning, and incredibly amorous opera singer in seventeenth century France.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, be shocked at just how close we’ve come to a nuclear apocalypse, and how the actions of brave individuals such as Vasiliy Arkhipovand Stanislav Petrov mean that we’re still around today.

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Images (L to R): Yarovskaya, M., Labunskaya, A. Vasiliy Arkhipov. Circa 1950s. Photograph. Via National Geographic.

Unknown. Stanislav Petrov. Circa 1960s. Photograph. Via Russia Beyond.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, explore the story of William Buckley, a convict who was transported to Australia only to make a daring escape and live amongst the local indigenous population for decades.

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Image: Woodhouse, Frederick William. The first settlers discover Buckley. 1861. Oil on canvas. Via State Library of Victoria.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, be amazed at an untold piece of Scottish History: the Darien Scheme, when Scotland attempted to start a colony in Central America, in the hopes of bridging the Atlantic and the Pacific Oceans.

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Image: Mortier, Pierre. Carte Particuliere de Isthmus ou Darien. 1700. Via The Vintage Map Shop.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn about the swashbuckling lives of Calico Jack, Anne Bonny, and Mary Read, three famous pirates that caused all sorts of havoc and mayhem at the end of the Golden Age of Piracy.

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Image: Cole, Benjamin. Ann Bonny and Mary Read convicted of Piracy Novr. 28th. 1720 at a Court of Vice Admiralty held at St. Jago de la Vega in a Island of Jamaica. Circa 1724. Engraving. In A General History of the Pyrates. London: T. Warner, 1724, pp. plate facing p. 157. Via Wikimedia.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, be amazed at the total lunacy that surrounded the 1904 Olympic Marathon, which featured people coughing up blood, getting attacked by dogs, stopping for naps, taking rat poison as a performance-enhancing drug, and even taking cars to the finish line.

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Image: Beals, Jessie Tarbox. Group of runners in the 1904 Olympic Marathon Race. 30th August, 1904. Photograph. Missouri History Museum, St. Louis Via Wikimedia.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the consequences of the famous Mutiny on the Bounty, and the fates of both the loyalists and the mutineers after the ship was seized.

https://halfarsedhistory.files.wordpress.com/2019/05/047-mutiny-on-the-bounty-part-2.mp3 Download Episode (Right click and select “Save as…”)

Image: Hodges, William. Tahitian War Galleys in Matavai Bay, Tahiti. 2nd October, 1776. Oil on canvas. Yale Center for British Art, New Haven. Via Wikimedia.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear about the leadup to and execution of the famous Mutiny on the Bounty, when malcontent British sailors seized control of a British vessel from their captain, William Bligh.

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Image: Dodd, Robert. The Mutineers turning Lt Bligh and part of the Officers and Crew adrift from His Majesty’s Ship the Bounty, 29th April 1789. 2nd October, 1790. Hand-coloured aquatint. National Maritime Museum, Greenwich, London. Via Wikimedia.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover the adventures and misadventures of the Russian Second Pacific Squadron, which sailed 29,000km to fight in the Russo-Japanese War.

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Image: Schoen, C. The Sinking of the Navarin. 1905. Painting. Via The Mary Evans Picture Library.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn about the amazing – and utterly ridiculous – life and times of Qin Shi Huang, the first emperor of China.

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Image: Unknown. Jing Ke’s assassination attempt on Qin Shi Huang. 3rd century. Stone rubbing. Via Wikimedia.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover one of the most ridiculous military operations in history – when the US mobilised over ten thousand troops to cut down a single tree in the wake of the Korean Axe Murder Incident.

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Image: Johnson, Wayne. Members of 2nd Engineer Battalion begin to cut down the tree. 21st August, 1976. Photograph. Via Wikimedia.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, be amazed by the bloodthirsty butchery perpetrated by the Britonnic queen Boudica, when she campaigned against the Romans in the first century.

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Image: Sharp, William, after Opie, John. Boadicea Haranguing the Britons. 1793. Line engraving. Via Wikimedia.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover what happened when Hannibal Barca attacked the Roman Republic after crossing the Alps, including the famous Battle of Cannae.

https://halfarsedhistory.files.wordpress.com/2019/03/041-hannibal-barca-part-2.mp3 Download Episode (Right click and select “Save as…”)

Image: Cort, Cornelis. The Battle of Zama. 1567. Copperplate engraving. Via Wikimedia.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn about the legendary Hannibal Barca and his crossing of the Alps to stage a land invasion of the Roman Republic.

https://halfarsedhistory.files.wordpress.com/2019/03/040-hannibal-barca-part-1.mp3 Download Episode (Right click and select “Save as…”)

Image: Leutemann, Heinrich. Die Karthager – Hannibals Übergang über die Alpen. 1866. Colourised woodcut. Via Wikimedia.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the life of Guillaume Le Gentil, who was fraught with unbelievably bad luck while attempting to observe the Transits of Venus in 1761 and 1769.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear about the Great Race of Mercy, where twenty courageous dog sledders attempted to prevent a deadly epidemic from wiping out the remote Alaskan town of Nome.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, relive the Burke and Wills Expedition, one of the first attempts to cross the inland of Australia from south to north.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover the life of Queen Zenobia, who forged an empire to rival Rome almost two thousand years ago.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the story surrounding the famous Spanish Armada - what it was, what it was trying to do, and just how catastrophically it failed.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn about an extraordinary figure from early palaeontology, whose fossil discoveries forever changed our understanding of the prehistoric world - Mary Anning.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover the life and times of Caligula, a short-lived Roman emperor known throughout history for his pants-on-head insanity.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, be amazed by the foolish optimism of Salomon Andree and his attempt to reach the North Pole - by hot-air balloon.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn about the enormous environmental damage done by one of the most terrible inventors in the history of our civilisation: Thomas Midgley, Jr. https://halfarsedhistory.files.wordpress.com/2018/12/031-Thomas-Midgley-Jr..mp3 Download Episode (Right click and select “Save as…”) Image: Blank & Stoller. Thomas Midgley, Jr. Circa 1930. Photograph.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, separate the truth from the fiction when it comes to the legacy of the brutal Vlad the Impaler, who is known for the harsh cruelty he showed to his foes.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, be mystified at the tale of the Mary Celeste, a ship that was discovered in the middle of the Atlantic, abandoned by its crew with all its cargo untouched.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, explore the life of the only female ruler of China, known for ruthless and strong leadership, the empress Wu Zetian.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, explore the absolute lunacy of the last emperor of Germany, Kaiser Wilhelm II.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear about the utter insanity involved in the Cadaver Synod, where a pope was dug up to be put on trial months after he'd actually died.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear about how a group of angry Bohemians chucked some blokes out of a window to trigger a religious war - and then did it again two hundred years later.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the insane economic genius of "Lord" Timothy Dexter, the original cashed-up bogan who built his fortune through ridiculous business decisions.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the story of an unsung German hero, Georg Elser, who attempted to kill Hitler all by himself just after the outbreak of the Second World War.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the incredible life of Jeanne de Clisson, who became known as the Lioness of Brittany after a brutal career from boring noblewoman to bloodthirsty pirate.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn about the final years of the Ned Kelly and his gang, including bank robberies, murders, and of course the legendary Siege of Glenrowan.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, be amazed at the ridiculous nonsense that went on during the early life of Ned Kelly, before he became the notorious bushranger and outlaw.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, uncover the complicated and tragic relationship between the cousins, rivals, and queens: Mary, Queen of Scots and Elizabeth I.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, be amazed by the story of Leo Major, a Canadian soldier who single-handedly (and single-eyededly) liberated a Dutch town.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, witness the ruthless brutality of the early Mongol Empire as they engaged in the Mongol Conquest of Khwarezmia.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, find out about Deborah Sampson, a woman disguised herself as a man so she could fight in the American Revolution.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, get amongst what happened during the Battle of Tours, and the ongoing debate about its significance in world history.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, get a sense of the lead-up to an event that is said to have changed the course of world history - the Battle of Tours.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, get more information about a hugely significant event in world history: The Assassination of Franz Ferdinand.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, be amazed at the sheer magnitude of idiotic disasters that were involved with the British K-Class Submarines.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, discover the battle with the most ludicrous casus belli you've ever seen - the War of the Oaken Bucket.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear the story of the Affair of the Diamond Necklace, where Marie Antoinette suffered at the hands of a daring con artist, Jeanne de Valois-Saint-Rémy.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear of the stupidly unlikely outcome of the Battle of New Orleans, the final conflict of the War of 1812.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, get stuck into the insane stories that emerged from the War of 1812, an often-overlooked piece of history.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear about the sky pirate D.B. Cooper and his clean getaway after skydiving away with over a million bucks.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, find out about the absolute lunacy that was theFenian Raids, where a group of Irish nationalists invaded Canada to secure freedom for the Emerald Isle.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, learn about one of the most colossal stuff-ups in history, wherein an army of Crusaders managed to sack not one, but two Christian cities: the Fourth Crusade.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, hear about how Olga of Kyiv took brutal vengeance for her husband's murder by burning down a city and burying her enemies alive.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, find out about how the 20th President of the United States, poor old James A Garfield, got gunned down by an absolute lunatic named Charles Guiteau.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, find out about the first losers in the race to the South Pole - the Terra Nova expedition, let by Robert Falcon Scott.

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In this episode of Half-Arsed History, explore the life of the red-hot pistol that was Frederick the Great, the most famous of the Prussian kings.