Fixing MY Crown: Recent Episodes
Ashley Al-Hajeri
Fixing MY Crown-As a mother of 5 boys, one no longer being with us, a wife, a Christian and a busy woman, Ashley often forgot to focus time on herself. This podcast will dive into struggles and insecurities. It will share the struggles of overcoming the loss of a child, struggles of self worth and so much more. With reflections, quotes and truth the plan is to share how day to day struggles still deserve praise as these struggles and victories are all a part of our progression in life. It's how we take these moments to impact who we are that matters. We are all responsible for fixing ourselves and being there for ourselves, this is essential to be the best version of us!
For so long in my adult life I often told myself my number one motivator to becoming a stronger person was my husband and children. After really reflecting and writing in my journal about this I have realized that in order to truly be happy with my successes, I have to be the reason to be motivated. I have to be worth the driving force behind the work put in. At the end of the day with everything stripped back, I have to be enough for myself and have to be the reason I want to be a better person.
For me this episode was difficult. My incident of sexual abuse as a young pre-teen really affected a big part of who I am today. With this being something my therapist and I have been processing recently, I felt compelled to start talking about the divide I feel in letting this part of me go.
After researching, reading and soul searching this past year these 10 things are what have really resonated with me on what I want to focus on on the path to a better me. These things are important to me to start getting to a healthier place for myself both mentally and physically.
There is one thing I've realized that was causing me to go down the path of self destruction and that was worrying about what others thought about my life and the choices I've made in it. I often lived my life basing my worth on pleasing others and not myself. I have had to dig deep to start the process of truly learning and understanding that I don't need others validation or acceptance to be happy. I need to make myself happy. I need to make decisions sometimes for myself.
Today is the 11th anniversary of my son Joseph's passing. Today I woke up in just this weird feeling. Its a day that I always reflect and play back, but as the years have passed and life has continued it has more recently become a day that I feel guilty each year simply because life has continued. This episode I reflect briefly on these feeling and the place that I am in 11 years later.
Staying motivated to complete life goals is one of the hardest things I struggle with still in life. As a busy wife and mother, I often just act and do without a set goal in mind. By the end of the day I would often feel unsuccessful with my time and as a person. I have found that when I write my tasks down and set goals to complete these tasks, I feel more successful with life. This podcast is about what I have found helps me in feeling successful and staying motivated. It is something I am still working on and still struggle with but when I do feel motivated I have found these tools have helped.
"If you don't try, you don't know." -Robin Arzon
As an adult I've have really noticed that I tend to pull away from trying things out of fear; fear to fail and disappoint. I often gravitate towards whats familiar and safe as opposed to taking risks and trying something new. This episode is about me talking about that struggle and talks about that. I also touch on Mel Robbins and I post I saw about being in survival mode. I've realized being in survival mode for so long has effected me in how I take risks vs just merely living to feel like I am just getting by or surviving.
This episode was difficult, but I felt like I wanted to go into this huge piece of my life early on into this podcast. This episode is about losing my first son as a baby and how it is a huge part of me and who I am today. This episode goes into how I handled this part of my life, how I got through this process and how it has help shape me into who I am today.
Hi everyone! I am new to this world, so this episode will give you a quick intro and dive into my first subject based on a quote I found in my journal. "Even at your worst, the right person will know your worth."