The Mind Whisperer: Recent Episodes
Michael A Gordon
Psychotherapist, Aikido teacher and writer/speaker Michael A. Gordon, MSc. brings 25 years experience in media and personal development. The Mindful Whisperer bridges neuroscience, spiritual psychology and mindfulness as they apply to a wide range of topics relating to daily life.
A far-ranging interview with David N. Meyer, cinema studies professor, screenwriter and author of Twenty Thousand Roads: The Ballad of Gram Parsons and his Cosmic American Music; The Bee Gees: The Biography; and A Girl and A Gun; the Complete Guide to Film Noir. Our conversation spans the neurobiology of addiction, the so-called '27 club' (Hendrix, Joplin, Cobain), addiction as creative hijack, and covering figures from Beethoven to Miles Davis, to painter Georgia O'Keefe, filmmaker Jean-Luc Godard, and Francis Ford Coppola's The Conversation (1974).
A short episode covering topics for my upcoming book: the erosion of civil discourse, 'slow motion disaster' and the collective trauma responses it induces, and a brief overview of how the psychological traits of cognitive dissonance and confirmation bias have corroded our public spaces.
An in depth conversation with Simon Fraser University professor Dr. Mark Fettes about Lewis Hyde's powerful book The Gift: How Creativity Transforms The World. Dr. Fettes is Associative Director of SFU's Imaginative Education Research Group.
Show Notes:
- The buddhist psychotherapist mentioned is Jack Engler. You can find his updated commentary on his infamous statement "You have to be somebody to become nobody" in the book Psychotherapy and Buddhism (https://www.amazon.ca/Psychoanalysis-Buddhism-Unfolding-Jeremy-Safran/dp/0861713427"
- The painter referenced as doing the portrait of Winston Churchill is Graham Sutherland.
We all want to feel self-love, self-acceptance. And yet we also crave approval, connection, belonging. Today we reveal a critical element to getting the balance right!
Emerging multidisciplinary research is giving us a lot clearer a picture of what defines truly happy individuals. The results may surprise you. It is certainly within all our reach.
With Valentine's Day approaching, it's timely to look at why so many relationships end up in breakup! How do we end up dating the same kind of person in a different package, and how do we change the pattern?!
It seems so straightforward: we make a resolution, plan and schedule it, and soon enough we fall back into old patterns. What drives this annoying, undermining phenomenon, and how to really make lasting change?
Rage, untethered and unfocused often points itself inwards, yet it masquerades as vengeful action. Truthfully, addiction is self-destructive; while seeming to mask the hurt, and buffer us from those that have hurt us, it really just turns us against ourselves.
As the US congress faces a full government shutdown over the budget, the extremism of the conservative agenda seems to invite this empirically-researched question. Find out how studies going back 60 years still stand up to suggest this hypothesis holds true.
So much of life is difficult and overwhelming, and despite spending much of our time chasing pleasure, we still feel unhappy. How can we change that in an instant?
The unresolved injustices and traumas of childhood can leave us with significant internalized distortions about ourselves that can misdirect unmet needs into self-aggression. How to we begin the journey to self-repair?
The search for the perfect soul mate leads us to the difficult truth of what we need to work on in ourselves. Our patterns are merely re-manifestations of many cycles of habitual behaviour which, if we realize and choose wisely of our partner, can lead us away from deeper separation.
August 6th is the anniversary of the dropping of the atomic bomb and total annihilation of Hiroshima, Japan, and three days later Nagasaki. How does history look back on this militarily rationalized mass murder of civilians, and what do we learn about our own dissociation from this act of violence.
It began with the 'crackberry' syndrome: those amongst us who were constantly glued to their handheld device, emailing, texting. No more in history have we been so pervasively distracted than with social media tech. What does this say, and how can we work with this as an aspect of our habitual patterns?
In the first episode, we covered emerging research on the impacts of social isolation on early childhood and the brain/psyche. In today's show, we explore the relationship with ourselves, and how to approach loneliness as an affliction of mind.
Decades-spanning research has been exponentially boosted by brain scanning technology, giving us a window into the social, physical and psychological impacts of loneliness/isolation, and how we need to prioritize attention to early parenting, schooling and social engagement in later life.
So often, despite our best efforts to be 'positive,' we keep getting stuck in our familiar negative patterns. How do we connect with and transform our deepest values and scripting, in order to experience limitless joy?
Anger, to paraphrase Siddhartha Gautama (The Buddha) is "like holding a hot coal and expecting the other person to get burned." How do we intercept and transform this explosive emotion in a mindful way?
From chronic pain, to mental and emotional anguish, find out why and how we can minimize our suffering in the face of painful experiences.
The quest for perfection can lead us to a self-destructive relationship with ourselves. How is perfectionism a symptom of negative conditioning?
What do the various Buddhist texts mean when discussing 'no-self?' If there is no self, how do 'we' exist, and know who we are? Where will I go if I recognize that Self is a concept to begin with!
Researcher Brené Brown writes about shame, vulnerability, and the relationship between gratitude and joy. What does she mean by "low tolerance for vulnerability makes joy forboding."
"They give birth astride of a grave, the light gleams an instant, then it's night once more," wrote Samuel Beckett in Waiting For Godot. What do we make of this existential tension, and the will towards creative expression in the face of impermanence!
In our most difficult moments, we realize that our greatest suffering comes from a feeling of 'not being there' for ourselves when we need us most. There is a painful awakening that we are estranged from ourselves. We can begin to soften and experience vulnerability within, as a strength.
Forgive, but don't forget--a very potent saying. We often mistake forgiveness for 'letting someone off the hook' for something. However, when we hang on to hurt, it is we who are on the hook....
To parahrase Gandhi, "You must be change you wish to see in the world." Today on the show, embodying change and leadership...
Many times, what makes a challenging situation or emotion more difficult is our initial urge to rush in and change it or avoid what it evokes within us. Making space creates a little breathing room, and often the right solution presents itself.
How do we take full ownership of our actions and what shows up in our lives? We continue this discussion by looking at self-responsible negotiation vs. blame.
How do we take full ownership of our actions and what shows up in our lives? In this conversation I discuss the critical aspects of becoming truly accountable, and how to move from victimhood to self-actualization.
"I don't likes spiders and snakes," as Jim Stafford's hit song lamented...Apart from primal fears, why do we experience phobias?
Einstein defined madness as "doing the same thing over and over, and expecting different results." Why do we fall into patterns that don't serve us, and how do we change?
It is said you can truly gauge the character of a person by the way they manage stress and difficulty. We cannot avoid difficult challenges, however we can minimize their impact while increasing our choices.
We move very quickly in this information age. And while information technology is supposed to make us more efficient, it actually just increases our workload. Find out how slowing down can make you more productive!
Most of our lives are guided by our parents' values, school programming and social/class expectations. But what about YOUR inner drive to fulfill your true purpose?
As my old teacher said, "familiarity, without respect, breeds contempt." How can a warm feeling turn so cold, so vengeful, so fast, and what can we do to change that pattern in our lives?
Letting of loved ones and our relationships can present us with our most challenging moments. Why is letting go so difficult?
How is it we can become addicted and desensitized to everything from substances like sweets, to shopping, and now--research proves--internet sex?
A recent Wall Street Journal article evoked a strong critcial response from Jezebel.com writer Lindy West. Today we discuss the issues, not from Lindy's insights, but looking at how intimacy can actually be the block to desire in long-term relationships.
What does it mean for a relationship when we argue? What happens if conflict surfaces early on in dating/relationship? Is this a sign of incompatibility? Shouldn't things be 'easy'? This episode looks at conflict in relationship, breaking through myths, and applying Attachment Theory to get a better understanding of how we function and make (un)conscious choices.
Narcissism is a word that pops up frequently in common use, but what does it mean? Are you aware that it pertains to a particular set of negative psychological traits?
From alt country forebearer Gram Parsons to legendary pop group The Bee Gees, David N. Meyer examines the interior/exterior lives of artists, and the toll exacted upon them by the creative process and pressures of public and commercial pressures.
David N. Meyer is the author of Twenty Thousand Roads: The Ballad Of Gram Parsons And His Cosmic American Music (Random House); as well as an upcoming biography on the Bee Gees for De Capo press. He is also professor of Cinema Studies at the New School.
We delve into what is deemed the 'hard problem' of Psychology. Is consciousness, and more importantly, psychological health, determined by 'bottom-up' or 'top-down' regulation and activity?
In this episode we explore the relationship between intimacy and sex, for those seeking a partner, and those in long-term relationships. Is intimacy the enemy of desire, or can desire be made the bed-fellow of intimacy?
**To listen/view this show, please visit: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8gE2E54nkcQ or http://www.facebook.com/TheMindWhispererShow Due to a technical problems, the live radio program here was cut short during broadcast.
Codependency is an oft misused term. While it most significantly applies to a relationship with an addicted partner, codependency has broader implications for healthy boundaries.
Find out why we can get so wired to the compulsive desire, and how delayed gratification most often supports healthier outcomes in our relationships, purchases, etc.
From bullying to homophobia, from domestic violence to terrorism, where are the seeds of hatred sown, and how can we work to overcome them?
There is a great 'luxury' as Chogyam Trungpa describes it, in indulging our passions in the moment, but they can become destructive. And the confusion that arises can be a kind of luxurious escape from reality and truth. Join us today as we explore this very fascinating notion.
How do we surrender in erotic love without losing ourselves? How do we meet in union to realize ourselves fully, without falling into boredom, disinterest or contempt? All this and more today...
How do we surrender in erotic love without losing ourselves? How do we meet in union to realize ourselves fully, without falling into boredom, disinterest or contempt? All this and more today...
This may sound rather esoteric, but it is really about connecting with the juicyness of all aspects of experience in everyday living, as a way of evolving towards absolute awareness.
We have about 60,000 thoughts a day, mostly negative! This is such an important topic we will be exploring it again.
What is the power of presence? What does being connected to the here and now enable us to fully experience and how can this help us in any situation?
There can be no self-defense if there is no opponent. How is that possible? Aren't there real attacks? What is spiritual warriorship, and how does Aikido teach us to win without fighting?
It is said that we can live from two choices in any given moment: love or fear. So how do we continue to choose love, and what does it look like to stay the course in the face of real challenges: jealously, hurt, despair, loneliness, heartbreak?
It is said that we can live from two choices in any given moment: love or fear. So how do we continue to choose love, and what does it look like to stay the course in the face of real challenges: jealously, hurt, despair, loneliness, heartbreak?
We continue the discussion how unconscious patterns and beliefs not only determine the choices you make, but the people and situations you attract--good or bad!
Tax season is upon us, but have you have you ever done a life audit? Have you truly taken an inventory of what is in your life? The law of attraction is not magic; it is the manifestation in life of what is in your subconscious programming.
Ah yes, the culmination of our 4 part discussion about love and attraction. Being Valentine's Day, what more perfect an opportunity to discuss what perfect love really means...
What if your perfect partner, your soul mate, was the one who drove you the most mental? How might it be possible that the perfect match for you is going to irritate you to no end, be a mirror for your own issues? Tune in, join in, and find out!
With Valentine's Day approaching, it is the perfect time to address the deep desire within many of us to find our 'perfect' match. The question is, what is required to bring that desire to fruition and that special someone into our life?
With Valentine's Day approaching, it is the perfect time to address the deep desire within many of us to find our 'perfect' match. The question is, what is required to bring that desire to fruition and that special someone into our life?
We continue last show's discussion, focusing on the consequences of being out of integrity with your (hidden) highest values.
Who is the 'you' that is running the show, asking the questions, and who is the 'you' that answers? Getting to the root of authentic being in the world, and what's in the way of living fearlessly.
A continuation of the past series of shows about dealing with difficult people, and being triggered into judgement/contempt!
Continuing from last week's segment on Negativity, we explore a listener's question about dealing with constant judgement of others!
We all experience negativity--towards ourselves, and as judgement towards others. But can negativity be positive? Listen in and find out!
On this show we discuss the most important determinants of success in life. (A hint: they have nothing to do with external circumstances). Tune in and join in on this important topic, as we all aim our sights towards bigger and better lives for ourselves going into 2013.
The discovery that the brain can re-wire itself, not only in terms of functionality--but its actual structure--has revolutionized neuroscience in the past decade. At the same time, the empirical evidence from brain research backs up thousands of years of contemplative practice from meditation and other mind/body practices.
Find out how happiness is a skill that can be developed and cultivated as our own inner medicine for mental disturbances and psychological issues.
Often times we feel like we never fit in, or that what others may consider unique, we consider a defect or flaw with ourselves. Let's take another look at 'normal' from a different viewpoint, shall we?
Tune in to find out why resolutions, on the whole, don't work, and what you can do instead to change your life and reach your goals in 2013!
**Due to a technical problem, the show didn't complete. We will continue the topic for this show:
What pulls us, lures us and attracts us to those we desire? What is the difference between love, lust and compulsion/addiction? We look at the psycho-biological influences and mechanisms involved in our conscious/unconscious choices in sexual desire, love attraction and other pleasure-seeking/avoidance behaviours!
What pulls us, lures us and attracts us to those we desire? What is the difference between love, lust and compulsion/addiction? We look at the psycho-biological influences and mechanisms involved in our conscious/unconscious choices in sexual desire, love attraction and other pleasure-seeking/avoidance behaviours!
The recent shooting of school children in Connecticut is the subject of this program, as we examine the impacts of mental illness, trauma, gun culture and how to build non-violence personally and societally.
**Tuesday's show was cut-off due to a malfunction, so we are re-visiting the topic for Thursday's show: This show will be a continuation of the discussion about vulnerability, relationships, intimacy and how to balance our fear of being open with our deeply-held and universal need for bonding and connection!
This show will be a continuation of the discussion about vulnerability, relationships, intimacy and how to balance our fear of being open with our deeply-held and universal need for bonding and connection!
Vulnerability is a word that, for many people, suggests weakness, letting your guard down and leaving yourself open to attack. But that understanding might just be based on a limited response, a rigid and protective sense of self in the world. What if we operated from openness, from connecting first to our own insecurities and our profound need to connect with others, and reached out from that place? Join us for a spirited discussion of how being vulnerable might actually lead us to being stronger.
The holiday season can be very challenging for the best of us, triggering all kinds of issues stemming from our original family dynamics. Tune in for a lively call-in discussion, raise your concerns, and join us for our inaugural show!