This was made based on the prompt "Eulogize an object you have lost." It was written, performed, and produced by Tal Minear.

Transcript: We are gathered here today to mourn the loss of the kitchen scissors. I know the kitchen scissors have touched all of our lives. Everyone has the place they saw these scissors last. I know we will all hold that location dear, filled with the memories of our time with the kitchen scissors. It was truly life changing when they arrived. Endlessly helpful and optimistic, it seemed like there was nothing that these kitchen scissors couldn’t do. We all know how much they liked to help with cooking and baking, but even when the random craft project or home DIY even took place they were always there to lend a hand. The day will be a little less bright without them here to see the sunrise. In these moments we must remember how brief life can truly- WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEY WERE UNDER THE COUCH THIS WHOLE TIME?