As we pass through the family orientation at my son’s high school, we stop and connect with many students, teachers, parents, and administrators. Particularly with the students, we ask how each is feeling about returning to school. And though I always get a thrill with the start of school, these students are feeling other emotions – anxiousness, sorrow, and even some dread. “There’s so much work ahead,” one said already exasperated. Friend drama, tough class schedules, and college applications loom and you can sense how it feels daunting for these rising juniors. When I asked teens and parents what their hopes and dreams were for this school year, they had many specific goals at the ready including getting a driver’s license, surviving calculus, heading to state championships for soccer, narrowing down a path toward a college major, and mastering executive function skills like organizing, planning, and managing their multiple goals and considerable work load.

Depending on the age and stage of the students in your home, some of these feelings may resonate. Or you may have younger children who are holding many fears of new teachers, new peers, and new academic challenges along with hopes for making friends, having some fun at lunch and recess, and connecting with their teacher.

Although differing grade levels and ages will anticipate in differing ways, they’ll surely share the fact that the start of school produces many feelings for students, faculty, and parents alike. That’s why, there a couple key points to remember in these first days:

1. Everyone deserves grace and patience. Nerves can make anyone scramble for words, or fumble for the right school supply needed. No one needs to be or act perfectly from the start though that’s precisely what so many of our students — and teachers! – expect of themselves. Take time with each other and offer plenty of patience for each person to get into a groove. Just as an orchestra may know their individual parts, it takes considerable time, consistency, and rehearsal to come together to make harmonious music.
2. The start of school is a process – a season – and not a single day. With each new day, there’s an opportunity to learn a name and connect to a unique passion or interest so that you truly remember it. This also means that there’s plenty of time to hope and dream together; to set intentions together; and to establish boundaries or ground rules together at school. And at home, there’s plenty of time to consider home routines like morning, after school, dinnertime, homework time, and bedtime and how plans for consistency and responsibilities around these routines can add to our children’s sense of safety and ability to learn and grow.
3. More rest, quiet, and renewal is needed at the end of each day. Because our students are using every ounce of self control and focus they have during these new school days, they will likely come home tired (and perhaps, grumpy too). Make time and space for extra care, extra down time, extra rest so that your home can be a respite amidst all of the pressures of the school day.

Confident Parents, Confident Kids has been reflecting on back to school season for twelve years now! And we’ve accumulated many articles and supports to help us all in this time of transition. Here are some of our best of… back to school!

Big Feelings with Transitions…

Supporting Your Child’s Emotional Well-being Going Back to School

How do you create a smooth transition into the school year for your child and with your family? Check out these ideas!

Dealing with Back to School Butterflies

How do you coach your child is dealing with their nerves on those first days back? Here are some tips!

Three Tips for Easing Back to School Stress

This one is a video with founder Jennifer Miller offering her three tips for dealing with back to school time stress.

Sleep and Other Routines…

Sleep, Teens, and Back to School Season

Yes, for teens, getting up early can be a truly difficult task as they fight their very biology that’s geared for staying up late and getting up even later. Check out these transition tips!

Helping Your Child Calm their Mind at Bedtime; Getting Into the Back to School Sleep Routine

Children’s minds are racing at the end of day with so many new challenges, relationships, and environments. They may even generate more energy as their body pushes through these first big days. Help them calm themselves so that they get enough to sleep to feel good and bring their best through these first few weeks.

Establishing or Reinventing Home Routines for Learning Success

Yes, home routines matter and directly impact learning. In fact, they may be one of the most significant ways in which parents can impact a child’s learning in school. Take some time to learn about how you can establish or reinvent your home routines so that they best promote learning.

A Giant Leap…Kindergarten…

Adjusting to Kindergarten; Exhilarating, Exhausting, and Emotional

Your transition into kindergarten with a young children can feel like a giant leap for the whole family. Your child will be required to learn a whole new way of “doing school” and they’ll need to use every ounce of self control they can muster to focus and adhere to those new school rules and routines. They’ll be big emotions at home as they release the pressure that has been building all day. Parents, you definitely can use some extra support! Check out these helpful tips from one of our most popular articles ever!

Parent/Caregiver Engagement in Schools and Learning…

How to Kickstart Your School Year with a Strong Parent-Teacher Partnership by Jenny Woo, PhD.

What are ways parents can effectively communicate in these early weeks that establish a positive relationship with their child’s teacher? These seeds planted can grow into a trusting, valued relationship that serves your child throughout the school year. Dr. Woo gives her best tips!

Discovering Treasures; Roles of and Opportunities for Parents in the First Six Weeks of School

Though parents can attend open houses and meet and greet teachers, they may not learn exactly what their roles and responsibilities are for the school year. So often, we, as parents, are left to figure out ways we can be a meaningful contributor. Check out these tips for parents!

And finally, schools and districts…Don’t miss our new Fall workshops for parents and caregivers and our new research-backed family-school partnership program entitled Listening Spaces!