Have you ever lost it—at a time when things were humming along for you? You were feeling good—until someone said or did just the thing to set you off. You got derailed, pushed out of your sweet spot. You stopped listening and started reacting. You no longer felt like a competent, functioning adult, responsible and caring. You turned into that awkward adolescent all over again as fears and big feelings took over.

Of course you have! We all lose it, some of us more than others. No matter how good our intentions, or how strong our willpower, we are no match for unregulated feelings. We all reach a tipping point. Our ability to manage what we feel sets the limits on our enjoyment of life and relationships. Under the right conditions, all of us can be pushed too far. But the trick is knowing how to get back to that sweet spot, those healthy emotions. When we don’t know how to get back, life becomes unbearable.

Excerpted from The Joy Switch: How Your Brain’s Secret Circuit Affects Your Relationships – And How You Can Activate It by Chris M. Coursey (©2021). Published by Northfield Publishing. Used with permission.