We Will NOT Play DnD: Recent Episodes
Dawn Somewhere
Glam Rock enters a dangerous power struggle three ways between the colony's bands. The system is based largely around the opinions of the band leaders, and with all three facing off, conflict becomes a certainty.
Mayson begins to take steps to alter the trajectory of Glam Rock's fate, but Brock isn't one to let go of an idea. Elvis and Lawry continue to grapple with their own personal issues, and Padre has a plan of his own.
Pieces are falling into place grudually. Mayson strikes a deal with Padre and feels out the opinions of his lady friends, while Lawry and Elvis deal with their own personal issues.
Mayson decides to turn to spy stuff to coordinate a dissent campaign with Padre Rockero and use his resistance to voice his own, but there's a bit of a hitch in that Lawry and Elvis have to cooperate with the plan.
The prospects of mining enough minerals to satisfy the Singer's tithe looks grim, and Mayson immediately gives up on the plan after hearing it. The trick is, opposing the whole thing without being the center of attention.
Paul decides to run a game with a premise that's a lot more technically challenging than the group's usual smash and grab adventures. It requires motives, character history with NPCs, and pants are banned due to the economic conditions of the sci fi dystopia in which it's set.
Literally down in the dumps, it feels like there's nowhere else to go, but then Elvis learns a small detail that compels the group to go even lower.
With a body on their hands and the town guard reviving the dead to question them, the team needs to take a few extra steps to cover their tracks, and with Lawry holding the wheel, it gets a little dark, testing everyone's patience.
The team gets a luck break when they find, essentially, a dumpster full of magic! It's the kind of discovery only a very select group of people with Elvis's specific knowledge would know the value of, and it turns the tables on the city.
Smelling Tony's offer as a trap, Elvis turns it down with force, and the party has no choice but to find some other means of living in the extravagant Pinball City. There aren't many practical options.
Trapped in ridiculous debt, the party has to figure out some way out of Pinball City. Unfortunately, there's a certain level of meta roadblock making the endeavor completely impossible.
Elvis asks the guys if they'd be willing to sit in with a new GM, but he's not totally forthcoming about the level of difficult history in the ongoing game. It's going to be a bumpy ride.
With Mack hot on their heels, the party manages to leave the Flavor Zone, but now they have the final hurdle of Guy Inferno in front of them.
Now with no other choice, the party must confront Mack, but the group has a scheme to set the destruction of the Flavor Zone in motion while Mack is distracted.
At nearly the final step of the journey, the party would be required to face the formidable Snack Attack Mack in order to rescue Paul's remaining line chefs, but Paul decides on a less direct route.
The team stumbles across Spalding by pure chance, and has the opportunity to demand an explanation for why he gave up on the escape. Afterward, it's time to confront Lafferty and put an end to the silliness of his candy kingdom.
If it's not one horrible world, it's another. The group manages to get back to their own bodies, but are faces with the bizarre and eccentric whims of Lafferty Tafferty.
Striking out on their own, it seems Crouton has thrown a few obstacles in the way of Paul's plans, and the dreaded Pimienta Fantasma is as serious as death in spite of his name.
The group goes to meet King Crouton to carry out the escape plans, but as these things often do, everything goes awry. The party is stabbed in the back and betrayed on several fronts, and must rely on a mix of wit and physical ability to survive.
There's good food, and bad food, good chefs and bad chefs. Sometimes a very bad, bad chef makes good food and puts it to the worst possible uses. This is the story of those chefs, their incarceration, and the mission to get back on the streets to sell the deadly street tacos they were born to make!
At last, the bones are found! But stealing them is an issue that was never dicussed. How exactly does one hold and run off with an artifact of pure, evil magic?
Not exactly a "trap" dungeon, the Bonesmell caves are still, all the same, a place where people are trapped and tormented. Some of those victims are more dangerous than others, and some are just trying to sell you something.
Deep within the depths of the Bonesmell ceremony chambers lurk magic mysteries centered around petty evil and doing wrong. Whether deliberate traps or merely punishments for the evil wizard's immediate family is unclear, but it's all pretty dangerous, anyway.
One of the simplest disguises is to behave like a high class individual. Everyone knows how to play the part! Just dress nice and act important, and the people around you usually handle the rest.
Elvis runs this night's game, and it's a heist. A magic heist, wherein the man planning the whole thing dies before getting a useful word out, and the fools who agreed to join him have to put the plot together by the seat of their pants!
The thing about evil secret conspiracies is that they always goes straight to the top! Rather aburptly, in this case.
Making the right friends is an important part of moving up in the vampire world. It turns out they all gravitate towards evil and scheming, which is kind of a terrible influence, but at least they help support your own evil schemes.
In the world of vampires, the big fish eat the little fish, and you can't throw a stone among important people without hitting someone who has a slew of absurd, supernatural drawbacks that prevents them from working regular hours.
The group goes to see Lawr's business contact, and he's willing to help in exchange for a small favor.
It's time to do what a vampire with mine powers does best and infiltritate somebody's place of business! And while invisibility is nice, the whole gimmick is quite all or nothing when people can either see you or they don't.
Paul and Elvis are a pair of sewer-dwelling vampires who moonlight as vtubers. Lawry is a high-powered manager at a private equity firm. Their lives tend to be situated above and below the mortals, which means all their big problems wind up weird and supernatual, if not still mundane.
A fight! Paperwork? Trees. The trials can be anything, but even greater than the struggle of seeing a professor is the effort to get them to do what you wanted once you get there. Robert's life is on the line and time is running out.
The Trial of Office Hours is the gateway between the students and their teachers, and ensures that only those students who don't need basic help can receive that type of help. Each segment of the trial is only sometimes deadly.
Where Tumbledry's education can be madcap and unpredictable, there is a counter-balance at Dorptoads, and Professor Fickletick is patient and methodical enough to weigh down everything. Skippybottom, meanwhile, has no sense of humor.
There are not many teachers at Dorptoads, and they get to make their own lesson plans, to a certain extent. As a result, classes tend to be a bit non-conventional and difficult to predict. Tumbledry in particular may pull anything out of his hat.
It's the party's first year at Dorptoad's School for Gods Among Mortals! And what a wonderful, magical, exciting time it is. There's chocolate creatures, hidden dangers, evil bad students who wear the wrong team colors, and of course, a grading system.
The crew is growing antsy and looking for explanations, and above that scapegoats. The time has come to draw some lines in the sand, figure out who's trustworthy, and make a few final leaps of faith.
Captain Bell has enough shenanigans and incompetence and locks up our heroes, who then get a chance to really hash things out with Alfonso and learn why he in particular is never killed.
Though they have a man who might know more about their dangerous situation, he's not exactly an ally. The only way to find out who will be killed next is to experiment and try to force a murder on someone, or something, less important to our heroes than themselves.
After a second killing, the reality becomes clear. The murders are related to a curse. But why? And how? These are things that either nobody is saying or that nobody knows.
One of the crew has been slain! But by what? Or who? Teeth marks would indicate some sort of creature, but the lack of footprints or other useful evidence leans towards the supernatural.
Adventure on the high seas! Playing as pirates in Madagascar, our heroes do all they can to make ends meet in a dwindling, hopeless crew. Misfortune is at the helm.
With death almost certain, the universe takes an unlikely twist in the form of savior mermaids who worship a volcano. But who can truly know the whims of the volcano but those who dwell upon the land?
The gang is found, and efforts to divert suspicion are only successful for so long. When the whole ship is alerted to the possibility of stowaways, it all comes down to fate, and then fate completely turns her back on our heroes.
If you can't get the supplies to stow away on your own, a passenger ship probably wouldn't notice a few extra strangers! Or a few extra crew members, for that matter, so long as you can get the look right.
Skipping town requires supplies, but getting supplies requires money, friends who have things, or a certain amount of wit. When you have none of that you make do with what you can get.
How might one get a human body from downtown to the woods with nothing but three friends and a bold attitude? There are many ways and some are worse than others.
Playing a fully ad-libbed game, our heroes are common, salt-of the earth miners of a magic metal. The pay is poor and the luck is worse.
It's finally time to get some real answers about this nano-tentacle nonsense! It'll just take a few forms, an arbitration agreement, and a liability waiver.
Bart's not a bad dude, honest! At least he doesn't mean badly, and to show it, he uses his crazy wealth to get the team back and track, and headed in the direction they were going before they tried to arrest him.
The team decides to go after one of the world's richest men. They don't have evidence, they don't have police training, and they don't have jurisdiction, but they have a hunch.
By completely sheer dumb luck, the universe throws our heroes a break and puts a suspect directly in their path. The man on the motorcycle returns, then tries to get away.
When the trail goes cold, it's time to hit the streets and ask some questions, but not before buying hotdogs, marshmallows, and camping supplies.
A murder perp is caught and her house is in need of investigating, but lo and behold there was no murder, and there is no spaghetti in the house to justify all these carpet stains.
Four friends play an exciting, fast-paced roleplaying game set in a far flung future you'd have a better understanding of if you'd read the handouts I gave everyone.