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Vairāgya (non-attachment/dispassion) is a key concept presented in Indian spiritual philosophy. Many of the texts including the Bhagavad Gita, Yoga Sutras of Patanjali and the Upanishads (see below for a few selected verses from these texts) emphasize the value of vairagya in eliminating suffering (commonly experienced stresses and strains in daily life) leading to a life full of peace and joy.

The word Vairagya (वैराग्य – vairāgya) is derived from the word ‘rāga’ (likes, attraction, attachment), the attraction which arises due to pleasure derived from any life experience. Vairagya is the opposite of ‘raga’ and means the absence of attachment to the pleasure that we derive from the objects of desire. Even though the word vairagya is derived from ‘raga’, it also includes the opposite of raga called ‘dvesha’ (dislike) which arises as a result of dislike or repulsion toward an object. Raga (likes) and dvesha (dislikes) are strong negative forces which create disturbance and pain in the mind.

When discussing the concept of vairagya in my yoga classes, I often get asked questions like: “How can I serve the needs of my family if I am not attached to the family members?”, or, “how can I perform my best at work if I have no attachment to my work or the goals that I want to achieve?”

Most of us are deeply attached to our material possessions like wealth, house, vehicles, jewelry, and other similar items. Similarly, we are attached to our body, mind, intellectual capabilities; our feelings and emotions; our ideas of right and wrong and so much more.

Understanding the concept of vairagya (non-attachment) involves recognizing how attachment can be harmful, undesirable, and a source of suffering in our lives. Attachment causes suffering because it ties our happiness and peace to external factors, which are constantly changing and beyond our control. We fail to recognize that lasting happiness cannot come from things that are temporary. As we know, all our possessions – wealth, house etc. – are impermanent. Our clinging to entities that are impermanent creates anxiety, dissatisfaction, and emotional turmoil.

In this article, I’d like to explore the concept of vairagya and how to practice it in a few life situations. Practicing vairagya (detachment) in daily life, especially when we are deeply connected to family, work, and other life situations, can be a subtle and challenging journey. Being detached doesn’t mean neglecting or abandoning our loved ones or our duties toward them. Rather, we need to shift our viewpoint regarding people and situations and how we relate to them.

We often claim that we are attached to our spouse, parents or kids because we love them, care for them and we want the best for them. Often this attachment translates to being attached to our own ideas of what’s right and what’s wrong. When our loved one to whom we are attached does or says something which does not match our idea of what’s right, we become all upset.

Let us take a few examples from our day-to-day life and see how we can apply the principle of vairagya in these situations.

Relationship with spouseFor example, my idea of love may be that my spouse MUST give me an expensive gift on my birthday. If that doesn’t happen, I get angry, upset and frustrated and may say something like, “You don’t love me because you even forgot that it is my birthday today and you never gave me a birthday gift!” These ideas of what’s right and wrong are all based on our samskaras (past impressions) which are etched deep in subconscious levels of our memory. It is our reactions based on attachment that become the cause of suffering and mental agony for us. That is why we need to cultivate and nurture the value of vairagya. In a relationship like this, we need to let go of any expectations. Instead of expecting our spouse to behave or act in a certain way, we need to allow them to be themselves. We need to recognize that happiness comes from within. This comes about when we detach from the “need to be right” and focus on open and peaceful communication bereft of any emotional entanglement.

Relationship with the kidsAttachment to our children is reflected in our feeling that we are responsible for their welfare, success and happiness. We feel upset and distressed when they make mistakes or do not perform in academics or sports to our expectations. We feel elated when the kids do well in school or any athletic endeavor. Here is a common scenario in most households with teenage kids: The child goes out to spend the evening with friends. The parents expect the child back home by 8 PM. However, the kid is not back by even 8:30. The parents now start worrying endlessly, playing all kinds of disaster scenarios in their minds – the child may have met with an accident, or may have had too much to drink etc. – and stay awake in a state of panic until the child gets home safely.

When we cultivate vairagya, we allow children to learn and grow from their own experience, success or failure. We encourage them to be independent while continuing to offer love, guidance and support. This way the kids become more self-dependent and free to chart their own course in life.

Attachment at WorkplaceIn the workplace, most common forms of attachment include desire for promotion, salary raise, any other form of recognition like a new title etc., more control, outcomes etc. Not achieving the desired end goal may result in stress, frustration and emotional upheaval. It can also lead to a feeling of inadequacy or injustice resulting in a lower morale which can only jeopardize further growth. Here are a few examples of how one can cultivate vairagya in a few scenarios at workplace:

Attachment to promotion/recognition: it is best to focus on the effort that you put in and also the learning that comes through working on the project rather than the expected outcome. Treat it as an opportunity to learn new skills so you can perform at a higher level in future.

Attachment to perfection and control as a team lead: This type of attachment can lead to burnout and frustration. To cultivate vairagya, it is important to understand that nothing is perfect. You must see mistakes and shortcomings as new opportunities for growth.

Attachment to approval from seniors and colleagues: When you seek approval, you may compromise your own values and principles. Any hint of non-approval may lead to a loss of self-worth or a sense of inferiority. To develop vairagya, you may practice finding validation within yourself by staying true to your own values. You may view criticism from others as an opportunity for growth.

The concepts of Karma Yoga (presented below) as presented in the Bhagavad Gita can become a valuable tool in cultivating vairagya at workplace.

Above, I have provided a few sample scenarios highlighting the value of vairagya in familiar situations. As we know, the list of entities that we are attached to is almost endless. Any kind of attachment results in suffering in the form of anxiety, dissatisfaction, and emotional turmoil because it ties our happiness and peace to external factors, which are constantly changing and beyond our control. It is through the practice of vairagya that we can achieve a true sense of freedom and lasting peace which is undisturbed by the constant change that life presents us with.

Discussion of vairagya in ancient textsYoga Sutras of PatanjaliAs we recall, the definition and the purpose of yoga given in the YSP is to “subdue the fluctuations that are constantly going on in the mind” – “yogash-chitta-vritti-nirodhaH” (sutra 1.21). In sutra 1.126 Patanjali states that these fluctuations can be subdued through “abhyasa” (practice) and “vairagya” (non-attachment).

Two levels of vairagyaPatanjali discusses two levels of vairagya in the sutras. One is usually referred to as “apara vairagya” (lower form of dispassion) and the other “para vairagya” (highest form of dispassion).

The lower form of vairagya is discussed in the sutra 1.152 :

The consciousness of self-mastery in one who is free from craving for objects seen or heard about is non-attachment. (sutra 1.15)

The word “drishta” (seen) in the sutra is supposed to include the attraction that we feel through all the five senses – sight, touch, smell, taste, hearing. When we have a pleasurable experience through our senses, we develop a strong attachment for that object. This develops a strong desire in us to experience the same pleasure over and over again. It is when that pleasure is unavailable or denied to us for whatever reason, we become extremely unhappy or “stressed out”. That is what causes suffering and pain in us.

The highest form of vairagya is discussed in sutra 2.163 :

“The highest Vairagya is one in which, on account of the awareness of the Purusha, there is cessation of even the desire for the three Gunas.” (2.16)

In this sutra, Patanjali talks about the highest form of vairagya which relates to the knowledge or awareness of Purusha. If you recall, Purusha is the consciousness principle or the Self. Purusha and Prakriti are the two realities mentioned in the Samkhya philosophy. Prakriti is the material counterpart of Purusha. The purpose of the practice of yoga is to understand that our true identity is nothing but the Purusha, not this mind-body complex which is a part of Prakriti. When we attain that objective, it is called self-realization. As the sutra states, this awareness of the Purusha is associated with total desirelessness of the three gunas of Prakriti.

Vairagya in the Bhagavad GitaThe concept of non-attachment has been dealt with in great depth in the Bhagavad Gita as well.

In one of the most often quoted shlokas (2.474 ), Lord Krishna says that we should do our duty without any attachment to the expected outcome of our actions. This verse can be considered as the cornerstone of the concept of Karma Yoga

कर्मण्येवाधिकारस्ते मा फलेषु कदाचन | मा कर्मफलहेतुर्भूर्मा ते सङ्गोऽस्त्वकर्मणि || 47 || karmaṇy-evādhikāras te mā phaleṣhu kadāchana | mā karma-phala-hetur bhūr mā te saṅgo ’stvakarmaṇi

“Your choice is in action only, never in the result thereof. Do not be the author of the results of action. Let your attachment not be to inaction.”(2.47)

Often our actions are motivated by some expected outcome. For example, we may work hard expecting a raise or a promotion. Non-attachment does not mean that we should not have set goals in life, or that our work is not motivated by goals. Non-attachment simply means that we are not attached to the expected outcome of our actions. We have full control only over the actions that we do. We do not have full control over what the outcome of our actions will be. However, if we don’t get the result that we expected, we feel miserable, dejected and disheartened. This is where the value of non-attachment comes in. When we understand the value of non-attachment, we accept the results of our actions without emotional upheaval. When the results are unfavorable, we can calmly analyze the whole situation and hopefully do a better job next time so that the projected goals can be achieved. This attitude will help us stay calm and peaceful in even the most difficult situations in life.

In chapter 6, Lord Krishna extols the value of keeping the mind calm under all circumstances in life. Arjuna observes that the mind is so restless that it is as hard to control as trying to control a boat in heavy wind. Lord Krishna provides the approach to calm the mind in verse 6.355 :

“Undoubtedly, the mind is restless and difficult to restrain, but it is subdued by constant vigorous spiritual practice (such as meditation) with perseverance and by detachment.” (6.35)

As you may notice, the approach given by Krishna in this verse – abhyasa (practice) and vairagya (non-attachment) – is the same as the one given by Patanjali in sutra 1.12.

Concluding remarksNon-attachment does not mean non-engagement. You can be deeply engaged with members of your family, working at job to your full potential, and still be fully detached. Detachment is about developing an understanding that allows you to act without being ruled by expectations or fear of loss. We learn to accept the flow of life and can care for others without feeling stressed by the need to be in control of the outcomes. Non-attachment helps us grow spiritually while still engaging fully in day-to-day life.

[Note 1] योगश्चित्तवृत्तिनिरोधः॥२॥ yogaś-citta-vr̥tti-nirodhaḥ ॥2॥
Yoga is the cessation (nirodha) of the modifications (vrittis) of the mind-field (chitta) (1.2)

[Note 2] दृष्टानुश्रविकविषयवितृष्णस्य वशीकारसंज्ञा वैराग्यम्॥१५॥
dr̥ṣṭa-anuśravika-viṣaya-vitr̥ṣṇasya vaśīkāra-saṁjṇā vairāgyam ॥15॥
The consciousness of self-mastery in one who is free from craving for objects seen or heard about is non-attachment. (1.15)

[Note 3] तत्परं पुरुषख्यातेर्गुणवैतृष्ण्यम्॥१६॥ tatparaṁ puruṣa-khyāteḥ guṇa-vaitr̥ṣṇyam ॥16॥
The highest Vairagya is one in which, on account of the awareness of the Purusha, there is cessation of even the desire for the three Gunas. (2.16)

[Note 4] कर्मण्येवाधिकारस्ते मा फलेषु कदाचन | मा कर्मफलहेतुर्भूर्मा ते सङ्गोऽस्त्वकर्मणि || 47 || karmaṇy-evādhikāras te mā phaleṣhu kadāchana | mā karma-phala-hetur bhūr mā te saṅgo ’stvakarmaṇi

“Your choice is in action only, never in the result thereof. Do not be the author of the results of action. Let your attachment not be to inaction.” (2.47)

[Note 5] श्रीभगवानुवाच
असंशयं महाबाहो मनो दुर्निग्रहं चलम् | अभ्यासेन तु कौन्तेय वैराग्येण च गृह्यते || 35|| śhrī bhagavān uvācha
asanśhayaṁ mahā-bāho mano durnigrahaṁ chalam
abhyāsena tu kaunteya vairāgyeṇa cha gṛihyate
Undoubtedly, the mind is restless and difficult to restrain, but it is subdued by constant vigorous spiritual practice (such as meditation) with perseverance and by detachment. (6.35)

[Note 6] अभ्यासवैराग्याभ्यां तन्निरोधः॥१२॥ abhyāsa-vairāgyābhyāṁ tan-nirodhaḥ ॥12॥
The restraint of these (mental modifications – vrittis) is attained by assiduous practice (abhyāsa) and dispassionate detachment (vairāgya) (1.12)

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If you have attended any of the yoga classes that I teach, you’d have noticed that at the end of the asana sequence and just before yoga nidra, we sit quietly for a “moment of reflection”. During this brief period, we try to replay in the mind the sequence practiced so far like a video replay. This reflection gives us an opportunity to become more aware of ourselves at the physical, breath and mental levels. This enhanced level of awareness helps us identify if at any time the mind, driven by the ego, rather than the intellect, tried to push the body beyond its natural limits

These three levels of awareness represent the lower three of what are known as Pancha Kosha (five levels of awareness). Let’s take a brief look at these levels of awareness.

The five levels of awareness

In the ancient text, the Taittiriya Upanishad (defined in section Brahmananda Valli with further elaboration in the section Bhriguvalli), it states that we can think of our being as a composite of five layers, sheaths or enclosures, called “koshas”. These are:

Annamaya Kosha (the physical sheath): this sheath is sustained by food. The word “anna” means food and “maya” means composed of or full of.
Pranaymaya Kosha (the energy layer): sustained by prana or vital life force, represented by our breath at a gross level.
Manomaya Kosha (the mental layer): primarily the cognitive mind, ego, memory and the lower intellect.
Vijnanamaya Kosha (the layer of intuitive wisdom – “vijnana”): the higher intellect which is free of influence by the ego.
Anandamaya Kosha (the layer of “ananda” or bliss): Unconditional, unalloyed source of inner joy or bliss.

Our yoga practice can be used as an effective means of building this awareness. The three key components of a regular yoga practice are – asana (physical posture), pranayama (breathing techniques) and meditation (calming the mind). Through the practice of asana, we develop awareness at the physical level (annamaya kosha), pranayama helps develop awareness at the vital energy level (pranamaya kosha) and meditation can lead to awareness at the last three levels – manomaya kosha, vijnanamaya kosha and anandamaya kosha. Once you deepen your awareness during your yoga practice, you can carry that same level of awareness to your day-to-day life. You can read more details about the five koshas on my blog here.

In our practice, during the “moment of reflection” mentioned above, we try to understand the constant interaction that goes on between the body, breath and the mind. For a given asana, the mind sets the intention and then guides the body through the moves needed for the asana. As an example, let’s take Pashchimottanasana (seated forward bending pose) and see how the mind and body may interact. Here are the basic instructions for the pose:

Sit down with your legs stretched out in front, feet together.
When you inhale, put the chin away toward the feet to keep the spine lengthened.
When you exhale, try to drop the chest closer to the thighs. If your hands don’t reach the toes, use a strap to maintain better awareness of the spine and to help deepen your stretch.

Let’s look at step 3 above. The mind sets the intention to try to deepen the stretch on each exhalation. When mind and body are working together harmoniously, the mind pays full attention to any messages or signals received from the body. If at any time the body becomes uncomfortable, the mind takes a step back and relaxes the pose.

On the other hand, let’s say the mind is being dominated by the ego. You look around and notice that the person next to you is able to touch the toes very comfortably. The ego might say, “if this guy can touch the toes, I MUST try to get there as well.” At that point the ego directs the mind to push the body beyond its limits to try and touch the toes. This obviously can lead to injury in situations where the body is not fully warmed up or just doesn’t have the necessary flexibility to go through the pose. In some cases, the opposite may also be true. The ego might say, “Ah! I am too lazy and don’t feel like trying to stretch. I’ll do some exercise later in the day by taking a walk.” As you can see, both these situations where the ego is playing a role are highly undesirable.

Four functions of the mind

To understand how the mind operates, it is usually described as a composite of four functions given below. In classical yoga literature, the collective term for these four functions is “antahkarana” (inner instrument).

Cognitive mind (manas – मनस्): this is the cognitive aspect of the mind; it carries out perception and cognition through the five senses as well as activate motor control. It interacts with the intellect and the outside world through the five senses.
Intellect (buddhi – बुद्धि): This is the decision-making element in the mind-field. It discriminates between all the dualities – good/bad, hot/cold, honor/dishonor etc. and helps us make ‘intelligent’ decisions. It interacts with the ego (ahamkara) and the chitta (storehouse of memories and past impressions, called samskaras).
Ego (ahamkara – अहंकार): Ego or ahamkara, literally the I-maker, is the one that identifies the Self with the mind-body complex and gives me the notion of my individuality. It interacts with the chitta (memory) and the intellect.
Storehouse of memories and past impressions (chitta – चित्त): This is where all the memories, past impressions (called samskaras), hidden desires (called vasanas) etc. are stored. Every action that we do, every thought that occurs in the mind, creates an impression which gets stored in the chitta.

You can visit my blog here to read the full article.

Who is guiding my mind – ego or intellect?The clear message here is that we need to learn how to identify whether our actions are being driven by the ego or the pure intellect. When our yoga practice is guided by the intellect rather than the ego, we make the practice safe, enjoyable, and optimally beneficial.

Having learned the message on the yoga mat, we need to apply the same concept in our day-to-day life. As we know, in many situations in life, we, knowingly or unknowingly, allow the ego to play a dominant role. Almost always it results in some kind of pain or suffering.

One of the challenges that we face in our day-to-day life is how to identify the role of the ego vs. that of the intellect. There are situations when I might believe that my present action is driven by my intellect but, in fact, that may not be the case. I may lack the discriminative wisdom to distinguish between the two.

I am giving below a few sample situations in our day-to-day life that may help us identify the role played by the ego.

“What’s in it for me?”While working on a project at work, you are solely focused on getting a promotion, salary raise or more recognition by the seniors. What you don’t realize is that this misguided focus is, in reality, a big deterrent in achieving the goals that you are seeking. You are unable to concentrate on the job and end up doing a poor job thus jeopardizing your chances of promotion etc.

On the other hand, if you are driven by your pure intelligence, you’ll be focused on bringing the best outcome for the project. You will invest time in training, learning through research or guidance from seniors so you have the skill set to do your best. This will automatically enhance your chances of getting a promotion etc.

“You make me so proud of you”This is what parents commonly say when their child does well in sports, academics, music etc. It may not be obvious, but the statement is heavily driven by the ego. The message the child gets is, “I must do what my parent like, so they are proud of me.” Parents are simply interested in getting their ego satisfied. The child is deprived of an opportunity to understand what is best for them. It limits their personality development. It may even make them fearful of their parents and stunt their self-confidence.

Difference of opinionLet’s say you’re in a conversation with someone and they share a different opinion than yours. When the ego is dominant, you begin to defend your point of view vehemently, even if it’s not based on logic or evidence. Rather than engaging in constructive dialogue, the ego can lead to stubbornness and a desire to “win” the argument at all costs. Your ego is telling you that you’re right and that they’re wrong.

When the intellect is guiding you, you listen to their perspective and try to understand where they’re coming from. You may still disagree with them, but you’re able to have a respectful and productive conversation.

Pleasurable vs. desirableHere is an example that I always give in the yoga workshops that I offer. When driven by the ego, you will go for the piece of cake which is highly pleasurable, even though you may be severely diabetic or have highly dangerous levels of cholesterol. Of course, when driven by the intellect, you’ll do the desirable which is to avoid the cake altogether. Please read my blog post here for a detailed discussion on this topic.

Yoga (and other physical activities) related injuriesIt is common in yoga practice (or any other sporting activity) that driven by the ego, you can push yourself beyond your body’s natural capabilities. You may be driven by a sense of competition and strive to outperform others or even yourself. This can cause serious injury and result in physical and/or mental anguish.

As mentioned above, in the yoga classes that I teach, I always have a brief “moment of reflection” wherein we try to develop a deep sense of awareness about the body and the mind so we can prevent any intervention by the ego in our practice.

Validation through social mediaWith the ubiquity and popularity of social media, people seek validation and approval on social media platforms, often posting carefully curated pictures and content to boost their ego. In the yoga community, it is quite common to see people posting pictures of their best yoga poses. They go to different locales like the beach, mountain, rocks etc. to shoot pictures so they are more appealing. Then likes, comments, and shares on these media platforms can become measures of self-worth, sometimes overshadowing the rational evaluation of the value of such online interactions.

Status SymbolsSome people are driven by the need to display status symbols like luxury cars and homes, designer clothing, or prestigious job titles to boost their ego and gain recognition. Many times, this involves undermining the financial or personal consequences. Pursuing a career or life path solely for the sake of achieving fame, wealth, or power, without considering personal values or fulfillment, can be driven by the ego’s desire for external validation.

Six enemies of the mind (shad-ripu)We all know that suffering is an integral part of life. What is the root cause of this suffering? Patanjali, in the yoga sutras, attributes this suffering to avidya (ignorance). When we are ignorant of our true nature, ego takes over and begins to dominate our decision making. As we know, the ego likes to identify every life experience with labels such as “like it/dislike it”, “love it/hate it”, etc. This kind of labeling leads to strong attachments or strong aversions (raga/dvesha) which give birth to the six enemies of the mind discussed below.

It is these strong attachments and aversions, which corrupt our mind with these six negative tendencies, which are commonly referred to as the six enemies of the mind (shad-ripu). All our behaviors and actions are constantly influenced by these six negative tendencies:

Kama (lust/craving)
Krodha (anger)
Lobha (greed)
Moha (delusion)
Mada (arrogance, vanity)
Matsarya (jealousy)

Please read my blog article here for a detailed discussion of these six negative tendencies.

How to let go of the egoAs mentioned above, dominance by the ego results in suffering. Patanjali, in the Yoga Sutras, tells us that by practicing the eight limbs of yoga (called Ashtanga Yoga) one can eliminate all the impurities of the mind (caused by the ego). This helps diminish the influence of the ego and can eventually lead to understanding our true identity – self-realization. The eight limbs of yoga are:

yama (restraint, interaction with others)
niyama (observance, applied to self)
āsana (physical seated posture)
prāṇāyāma (regulation of breath)
pratyāhāra (Sense withdrawal)
dhāraṇā (focus/concentration)
dhyāna (meditation)
samādhi (total absorption)

Of these, the three that are important from the point of view of yoga practice are asana, pranayama and meditation. Of these three, the most important practice is that of meditation. Meditation helps us calm the mind so we can think more clearly and use the intellect rather than the ego for our decision-making. We also need a deep understanding of the concepts presented by Patanjali, so we can realize the damage that an elevated ego can cause. With this understanding at an intellectual level, augmented by a regular practice of meditation, we can truly begin to enjoy life and not be bothered by little ups and downs that we are always confronted with. Please visit my blog here for a brief introduction to the yoga sutras and the eight limbs of yoga.

When the intellect gets sharper and influence of the ego is diminished, you will be able to:

Be open-minded and willing to learn new things.
Be objective and try to see things from a neutral perspective.
Be discerning and weigh different options carefully before making a decision.
Be empathetic and try to understand the feelings of others.
Be courageous and stand up for what you believe in, even if it’s unpopular.
Make better decisions in all areas of your life and make choices that are in your best interests.

Recommended daily mental activityEveryday, at the end of the day, before going to bed, mentally go through the events of the day and pick three of the most significant events. For these events, try to make an assessment as to which of the two – ego or intellect – played a dominant role. When you do this regularly, your assessment will become clearer, and you will become more aware of how not to be influenced by the ego. This will lead to a more peaceful and joyful life.

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Depression

Introduction

Depression is a common mental disorder that afflicts a large number of people. It can negatively impact the way you think, feel and act. Often characterized by overwhelming sadness, lethargy, and a sense of hopelessness, depression can deeply impact one’s emotional, cognitive, and physical well-being. Understanding its causes, effects, and various approaches [...]

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Chatter in mind

“How hard it is to control the mind! Well, it has been compared to the maddened monkey. There was a monkey, restless by his own nature, as all monkeys are. As if that were not enough some one made him drink freely of wine, so that he became still more restless. Then a scorpion stung him. When a man is stung by a scorpion, he jumps about for a whole day; so the poor monkey found his condition worse than ever. To complete his misery a demon entered into him. What language can describe the uncontrollable restlessness of that monkey? The human mind is like that monkey, incessantly active by its own nature; then it becomes drunk with the wine of desire, thus increasing its turbulence. After desire takes possession comes the sting of the scorpion of jealousy at the success of others, and last of all the demon of pride enters the mind, making it think itself of all importance. How hard to control such a mind!” – Swami Vivekananda (Complete Works – Raja Yoga)

This famous quote from Swami Vivekananda sums up the state of our mind – incessantly restless! There is constantly something or the other happening in the mind – thoughts, worries, anxieties, likes, dislikes, variety of emotions, negative feelings, positive feelings, planning, scheming …. and the list can go on. The change in the mind is continuous.

To understand what goes on in the mind, we need to start by realizing that every experience that we have in life gets stored in our memory bank. Each experience also gets labeled as – I like/dislike it; I love/hate it; I want/don’t want it; It is pleasant/unpleasant etc. When we have a pleasurable experience, it leaves an impression in the mind along with a desire for a repeat of that experience. When a similar desire comes up, we repeat that experience. With every such repetition, the impression in the mind, called samskara, gets stronger and stronger. Now that becomes a natural response, and you may develop a craving for the same experience to happen on a repeated basis. When the need to consume some item becomes totally compulsive, we call that an addiction.

When we have an unpleasant experience, it leaves a negative impression in the mind along with a desire to avoid similar experience in the future. Now, when we have an experience which is “seemingly” similar to that unpleasant experience, but may be totally unconnected, we still want to habitually avoid that experience.

Some possible causesLet’s look at some possible scenarios which can lead to this constant barrage of thoughts in the mind.

Six enemies of the mind (shad-ripu)In a previous article, I talked about the six commonly mentioned enemies of the mind:

kāma (lust/craving)
Krodha (anger)
Lobha (greed)
Moha (delusion)
Mada (arrogance, vanity)
mātsarya (jealousy)

In many situations, an experience caused either by an external event (say, a dispute with the spouse), or by pulling something from the memory (an event that may have caused pain in the past) can cause one or more of these six emotions to erupt in the mind. Once triggered, these emotions can spiral into more negative thoughts caused either by digging deeper into the past or projecting into the future. Essentially, we are unable to stay focused on the present moment while the chain of thoughts continues to circle in our mind. Please read this article to learn more about these six negative emotions.

Unresolved conflicts in the mindConflicts and concerns can be caused through personal relationships with family and friends, situations at work, any competitive sport that you may be involved in and many similar situations. These conflicts can range from a minor difference of opinion to major disputes leading to lawsuits, aggressive confrontations, physical abuse etc. Once triggered, they can have a spiraling effect and occupy the mind for long periods of time.

Depression, anxiety and stressAny one of these emotional states of the mind can cause a loss of self-esteem, self-confidence and lead to constant worry, guilt feelings, a sense of dejection etc. When the mind is in such a state, it repetitively goes through the same scenario that caused the anxiety or stress in the first place. This, of course, only aggravates the situation further making it even harder to pull out of the situation.

“Modern” lifestyleLet’s say we are deeply focused on preparing the final report of the project just completed at work. Suddenly we receive a message on whatsapp about a “must see”/ “not to be missed” video and we get distracted away from our work. Once there, we get pulled into other similar messages and eventually it’s time for a cup of coffee and we end up missing the deadline for submission of our report. As we can imagine, missing the deadline will be a cause for more stress and anxiety and the circle goes on.

Not knowing how to calm the mindAs we know, practices like yoga, including all its aspects – asana, pranayama and meditation – are techniques that are known to help still the mind. Like learning any new skill, how to calm the mind is also a skill that takes some time and effort to learn. Having learned the basic techniques, it requires regular practice to achieve the desired results.

How can yoga help in stilling the mind? If you recall, the very definition of yoga according to Patanjali (sutra 1.2) 1 is “the ability to calm the fluctuations of the mind is defined as yoga”. To help achieve the goal of yoga, he has provided us with the eight limbs of yoga, commonly known as “Ashtanga Yoga”. You can read a brief introduction to the eight limbs of yoga on my blog here. From a practical point of view, the three most important components of yoga practice include asana (physical postures), pranayama (breathing techniques) and meditation. As we know, most people tend to practice the asana part of the eight limbs as their yoga practice. Practicing asanas will no doubt make the body stronger and more flexible. However, to still the constant chatter in the mind, the other two limbs – pranayama and meditation – play a more important role than just the practice of asana. In fact, in terms of priority, Patanjali recommends giving the highest priority to meditation, then pranayama and finally asanas. So, when the goal is to still the mind, while allocating time for our yoga practice, we need to allocate time for meditation and pranayama in preference to asanas.

Here are a few other ideas to help calm the mind:Burning the emotional backlogThis is a powerful practice. First you need to create what can be called a “thought dump” of everything that’s occupying your mind at a given time. On a piece of paper, try to write down the most dominant thoughts and emotions. Then make an effort to write down what could have caused that emotion. As you go deeper into the cause of these thoughts, you might even dive into your past and write down all that seems related to the current emotion. You will need to do this for all the thoughts that are prominent in your mind.

Having written everything that came to mind related to a thought, you need to read it aloud to yourself. While doing this reading, some other thoughts may come up which again you need to add to the writeup. Read once again the final writeup aloud to yourself. Having finished the reading, you need to burn that piece of paper, symbolically getting rid of your emotional backlog. This will give you a feeling of lightness and give a deep sense of mental relief. This exercise will help you loosen the hold that these deep-seated emotions have on you and keep coming back to haunt you all the time.

Engage in self-careGoing for long nature walks, listening to music that you enjoy, spending time in some kind of a hobby or activity that will keep your mind focused and engaged for a period of time, spending time with close friends and family members etc.

Minimize distractionsAs and when convenient, stay away from social media, phone, TV and any other such activities that can stimulate and distract your mind.

Keep in mind that attaining a state of mind that is calm and peaceful is a slow, gradual process. Of the suggestions made above, pick those that seem to resonate most with you. Establishing a set daily routine will be helpful in “getting there” quicker.

_________

yogaś-citta-vr̥tti-nirodhaḥ ॥1.2॥

“The restraint of the modifications of the mind-field is Yoga.”

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In our day-to-day life, we are always presented with various alternatives to choose from. For example, in terms of food, we are often confronted with having to choose between food that tastes great but is known to be unhealthy (let’s say French Fries and coke) and a healthy, home-cooked veggie dish which we may not find tasty enough. Similarly, in order to maintain a healthy body and mind, we may commit ourselves to a regular, daily yoga routine early in the morning. When the alarm goes off in the morning, we are confronted with having to choose between staying in the warm, comfortable bed a little longer or making the unpleasant choice of jumping out of bed to practice yoga.

As we know, we are always faced with similar situations in every aspect of our life, be it work, family, shopping, planning a vacation etc. More often than not, we end up making a choice that is pleasing but not necessarily desirable versus another alternative that may be highly desirable but not pleasing. For the most part we prefer something that is pleasing to one of the five senses – hearing, touch, sight, taste and smell. Choosing pleasant over the desirable may provide instant gratification but can cause incurable harm in the long run. We all know how, by choosing to consume food that is pleasant but otherwise unhealthy, we can end up getting all kinds of serious ailments like high BP, diabetes, cancer etc.

How do we determine if something is pleasant or not? It is all based on our past experiences that get lodged deep in our memory. When we have a pleasurable experience, it leaves an impression in the mind along with a desire for a repeat of that experience. When a similar desire comes up, we repeat that experience. With every such repetition, the impression in the mind, called samskara, gets stronger and stronger. Now that becomes a natural response, and you may develop a craving for the same experience to happen on a repeated basis. When the need to consume some item becomes totally compulsive, we call that an addiction.

Why do we lean toward choosing the pleasant and not what is desirable? Such choices are all driven by the ego (ahamkara). As I wrote in another article, there are four functions of the mind – cognitive mind, intellect, ego and memory. In a majority of situations, the ego tends to dominate the intellect and we end up making a choice that is pleasant irrespective of its desirability. Ideally, we’d want to make a choice which is both desirable and pleasant. However, there are situations wherein what’s desirable is not necessarily pleasant, as we saw earlier when choosing between leaving a warm, comfortable bed or getting out of the bed to practice yoga.

In one of the ancient texts, Katha Upanishad, there are two verses which talk about the concepts of shreyas (desirable) and preyas (pleasant).

अन्यच्छ्रेयोऽन्यदुतैव प्रेयस्ते उभे नानार्थे पुरुषंसिनीतः ।

तयोः श्रेय आददानस्य साधु भवति हीयतेऽर्थाद्य उ प्रेयो वृणीते ।।

anyacchreyo’nyadutaiva preyaste ubhe nānārthe puruṣaṃsinītaḥ ।

tayoḥ śreya ādadānasya sādhu bhavati hīyate’rthādya u preyo vṛṇīte ।। (KU 1.2.1)

Shreyas (desirable) is different indeed, and so is the preyas (pleasurable) different. These two, serving different purposes, bind people. One who chooses shreyas reaps good benefits whereas one choosing preyas does not reach the desired goal.

श्रेयश्च प्रेयश्च मनुष्यमेतस्तौ सम्परीत्य विविनक्ति धीरः ।

श्रेयो हि धीरोऽभि प्रेयसो वृणीते प्रेयो मन्दो योगक्षेमाद्वृणीते ।।

śreyaśca preyaśca manuṣyametastau samparītya vivinakti dhīraḥ ।

śreyo hi dhīro’bhi preyaso vṛṇīte preyo mando yogakṣemādvṛṇīte ।। (KU 1.2.2)

Both shreyas and preyas are available to everyone. The wise one, with due consideration, can distinguish between the two. The wise one, then, chooses the desirable over the pleasant whereas the one who lacks intelligence picks the pleasant as it offers immediate gratification and protection (for the body etc.).

Now that we know that choosing preyas over shreyas can lead to suffering both at physical and mental levels, how can we bring about this change in us that will help us prefer the desirable and not the pleasant? One place to look for answers is the Yoga Sutras of Patanjali which provides practical guidelines on how to diminish the role of the ego and make the intellect sharper. That way, we develop higher power of discrimination, called “viveka” which will help us in making the right choice at every step in our life. Patanjali, in the yoga sutras, provides us with the eight-fold path of yoga by practicing which we can attain this discriminative wisdom. Please visit my blog here for a brief summary of the eight limbs of yoga – yama, niyama, asana, pranayama, pratyahara, dharana, dhyana and samadhi.

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Introduction Vishnu Mudra

To breathe is to live, and without breath there is no life. As you may be aware, the theory of Karma is recognized as a key part of the Indian philosophy. As stated by Patanjali in the Yoga Sutras (sutra 2.13), our karmas determine these three attributes of our future birth – [...]

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Samadhi

In my yoga classes, every now and then I ask the question, “what do you understand by the term yoga”? The most common answer that I get is, “yoga is the union of mind, body and the soul”.

Some other answers are:

Union of mind and body Union of mind, breath and body [...]

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Who am I?

Let’s look at some of these statements that we either make or hear from others.

“I am angry”

“I am frustrated”

“I am now 5’3” tall; was only 16” tall when born”

“I am cold/hot”

“I am really happy”

What we notice in all these statements is the common factor “I” [...]

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Patanjali Yoga Sutras

Here is a great opportunity for you to get introduced to the underlying concepts of yoga! These discussions can help greatly in developing a deeper understanding of your true nature and also eliminate stress and anxiety from your lives. I invite you to join me for this 14-week intensive.

The class [...]

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Patanjali Yoga Sutras

The class [...]

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Almost everyone experiences situations which cause anger. Anger is usually accompanied by fear, frustration, powerlessness etc. On the one hand, it can lead to uncontrolled, violet behavior. On the other, we can temporarily suppress it but deep down it can keep simmering, ready to explode given a suitable trigger. A few common [...]

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Related posts:1. Understanding Vairagya (dispassion/non-attachment) The word Vairagya is derived from the word ‘raga’ (likes,...

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Samkhya karika study group starting Nov 27, 2010 [...]

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The word Vairagya is derived from the word ‘raga’ (likes, attraction, attachment), the attraction which arises due to pleasure derived from any object. Vairagya is the opposite of ‘raga’ and means the absence of attachment to the pleasure that we derive from the objects of desire. Even though the word vairagya is derived from ‘raga’, [...]

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Habits

“It’s 7 AM, time for my coffee.”

“It’s 9 PM, time for my favorite TV show.”

“I know I have an appointment to see him at 7 PM; however, I need to finish watching this game on TV – I’m sure he wouldn’t mind waiting for some time. “

Habits. We are [...]

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Patanjali Yoga Sutras

In [...]

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All is suffering

Suffering, as we know, is a part of life. When the baby is born, the first sound you hear from the baby is that of a cry. During our lifetime, we go through all kinds of pain and suffering caused by disease, injury, fatigue, stress, disagreements, old age, and finally death etc. [...]

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Padmasana (Lotus Pose) I am pleased to announce the next Meditation Intensive. In this program, I will discuss the basic concepts of meditation and practice several of the concentration (dharana) and meditation (dhyana) techniques. Most of the information that I will be sharing is based on the concepts discussed in Patanjali’s Yoga Sutras and related classical yoga texts.

No prior asana, pranayama or meditation experience is required.

In view of the current situation with the COVID-19 virus, I will be offering this class via live video streaming using the Zoom platform.

Program Information * What: 14-day Meditation Intensive * When: Monday, June 8 – Sunday, June 21, 2020 * Time: 6:00 – 7:30 AM (US East Coast time, GMT-4) * Access: Remotely via live video streaming (Zoom); login info will be provided upon receipt of registration and payment * Instructor: Subhash Mittal * Daily Routine: Light stretching (10-15 minutes), Pranayama (15 min), Relaxation (10-15 min), Discussion and meditation practice (40-45 min) * Commitment: A firm commitment to follow this schedule and attend every day * Fee: + $80 – check, Zelle (use subhashmittal@gmail.com) or Venmo + $85 – paypal (go to bottom of page) * To register: fill out the registration form and submit it online.

Strongly recommended * Light,’sattvic’, nutritious, VEGETARIAN food * No alcohol, drugs, tobacco or any other item of similar nature * A personal commitment to continue the practice after the program is over

Do not hesitate to contact me if you have any questions. I look forward to your participation.

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What is willpower? What is willpower? Merriam-Webster dictionary defines willpower as “energetic determination”. That means we make an enthusiastic mental resolution to achieve a certain goal in a certain period of time and then use “energetic determination” to stay on course to achieve success in our endeavors.

We are all too familiar with people making lofty New Year resolutions. Just a few days or weeks into the New Year, these resolutions seem to evaporate into thin air for most people. Why is that so? It is all because of the lack of willpower or the “energetic determination” to stay on course with the resolve made on the New Year Eve.

Let us take weight loss as an example. This is perhaps the most common resolution people make for the New Year. Of course, at a high level, everyone knows how to lose weight. It involves only two ingredients – exercise more and eat less – more output, less input! Simple, yet difficult to achieve. What prevents them from following this simple regimen? Lack of willpower!

Willpower and the Yoga Sutras To understand willpower better and learn how to make it stronger, let us turn to some of the concepts presented in the Yoga Sutras by Patanjali. Let us recognize first that willpower is a function of the mind. As we all know, yoga, as defined and discussed by Patajanli, is all about calming and controlling the mind. In an earlier article I discussed how the mind functions. In that article, we mentioned that the mind can be considered a composite of four major functions – cognitive mind, intellect (discriminatory function), ego and the memory. The intellect is sometimes referred to as the “higher mind” and the ego as the “lower mind”. In our normal state of being, the intellect, unfortunately, is dominated by the ego. Any intention set by the intellect gets usually derailed by the ego. Ego is driven by attachment to previous pleasant experiences and aversion to previous unpleasant experiences.

Let us say that your higher mind (intellect) decides to set the intention to wake up early in the morning to do some yoga practice and set the alarm for 6 AM. Come 6 AM, the alarm goes off. Guess who waked up first? The lower mind (ego), of course, and it immediately prompts you to hit the snooze button. This is based on past pleasurable experience of staying under the covers rather than waking up and getting out of the bed that early. We see the same pattern of ego dominating the intellect in most of our life experiences.

Patanjali, in the Yoga Sutras, states that through a regular and sustained practice of the eight limbs of yoga, we can sharpen the intellect and weaken the ego. As a result, more decisions are based on what is “desirable” rather than what is “pleasurable” in a given situation. In the following sutra, he gives us specific guidelines as to how to strengthen the willpower and how to achieve the desired goals.

Three pillars of “kriya yoga” (yoga of activity) तपःस्वाध्यायेश्वरप्रणिधानानि क्रियायोगः॥१॥

tapaḥ svādhyāy-eśvarapraṇidhānāni kriyā-yogaḥ ॥1॥

“tapas, swadhyaya, and Ishwara-pranidhana” constitute “kriya yoga” (sutra 2.1)

Tapas Tapas is usually translated as austerity or ascetic practices. These are practices and observances that are done to toughen us up both physically and mentally, essentially building a strong willpower. Yogic practices of tapas may include maintaining a regular yoga practice consisting of asana, pranayama and meditation; observing periodic fasts; regular donations to some charity; or giving up some addiction – TV, smoking, drugs, alcohol etc. for a duration of time As a result of these practices we can withstand the dualities of life that we are faced with every step of our life – dualities like heat and cold, honor and dishonor, good and bad etc.

In our example of achieving weight loss, this would mean establishing a plan of action to attain our goal and sticking to the plan without break or interruption.

Swadhyaya Swadhyaya means study of ancient scriptures in an effort to study and understand the “self”. From a yogic perspective where the goal is to attain the state of samadhi, swadhyaya usually implies study of ancient texts like the Vedas, Upanishads, Bhagavad Gita, Yoga Sutras etc., and then apply these learned concepts to a deeper exploration and understanding of our inner being, leading to self-realization.

In our example of weight loss, having a raw, strong willpower is not adequate to reach the goal. We need a carefully understood and laid out plan of action. As mentioned earlier, the two key ingredients of weight loss are diet and exercise. For diet, it is important to have a thorough understanding of the nutritional needs that are based on:

Age
Health situation (diabetes, blood pressure, heart problem, kidney issues etc.)
Ethnic and cultural background
Vegetarian vs. non-vegetarian
Season of the year (summer/winter/spring/fall)
etc.

Based on these factors, one needs to carefully lay out a diet plan that is individually tailored, effective, practical and achievable.

A similar approach is needed to establish a plan of action for exercise. This plan must also be based on factors like age, health condition, lifestyle, season of the year etc. A well integrated yoga routine consisting of asana (physical postures), pranayama (breathing exercises) and meditation will provide a nice workout at all levels – physical, physiological and mental.

Ishwara Pranidhana (Surrender to higher Self) Setting an intention, making a plan of action and using a strong willpower to carry out the plan diligently is all in our hands. What is not in our hands is to “dictate” the outcome of our endeavors. If our goal to lose 10 lbs in a certain period of time is not met, we don’t want the ego to impose self-judgment, self-criticism, feelings of inadequacy, feelings of guilt etc. Whatever is the outcome, we must accept it gracefully. Maybe our goals were unrealistic to begin with, or, maybe something was lacking in our understanding and approach. All we need to do is to re-calibrate our plans and continue with the endeavor without feeling upset or disheartened.

Meditation – key to mind control As mentioned earlier, willpower is a function of the mind. The practice of yoga is all about controlling and stilling the mind. The definition of yoga according to Patanjali is “yogash-chitta-vritti-nirodhaH” – yoga is the ability to subdue the fluctuations of the mind (sutra 1.2). As we said, ego tries its best to derail the mind from its resolve. The resulting wavering of the willpower is a fluctuation of the mind. It is through the practice of the eight limbs of yoga that we can still the mind. As per Patanjali, meditation is the most important of these limbs of yoga and is the key to stilling the mind. So, in order to develop a strong, unwavering willpower it is important to allocate a certain amount of time for meditation on a daily basis.

The key to success is to establish a regular, preferably daily, yoga routine that consists of asana, pranayama and meditation. Patanjali, in sutra 1.14, states that practice becomes firmly established when carried out for a long time, uninterrupted and with a sense of devotion and trust.

I hope you will find this article helpful in developing a strong willpower that will help you achieve your desired goals in life. I would love to get your feedback.

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The Buddha, in his Four Noble Truths, stated:

Life is suffering (Dukkha)
There is a cause for this suffering
We can put an end to this suffering
Here is the eight-fold path to follow to end suffering

Five Kleshas The Yoga system of Patanjali presents a concept of suffering, or pain, which is very similar to the one mentioned above from Buddha. In modern terminology, ‘stress’ is another name for this suffering. Patanjali uses the term ‘klesha’ to denote afflictions, pain or suffering. He talks about five different kleshas, their cause and the remedy. These keshas are:

Sutra 2.3 अविद्यास्मितारागद्वेषाभिनिवेशाः क्लेशाः॥३॥
avidyā-asmitā-rāga-dveṣa-abhiniveśaḥ kleśāḥ ॥3॥

Avidya (Misapprehension About The Real Nature Of Things)
Asmita (Egoism)
Raga (Attachmant
Dvesha (Aversion)
Abhinivesa (Fear Of Death)

Avidya (Ignorance) Sutra 2.4 अविद्याक्षेत्रमुत्तरेषां प्रसुप्ततनुविच्छिन्नोदाराणाम्॥४॥
avidyā kṣetram-uttareṣām prasupta-tanu-vicchinn-odārāṇām ॥4॥

Ignorance is the field for the others mentioned after it, whether they be dormant, feeble, intercepted, or sustained.

Sutra 2.5 अनित्याशुचिदुःखानात्मसु नित्यशुचिसुखात्मख्यातिरविद्या॥५॥

anityā-aśuci-duḥkha-anātmasu nitya-śuci-sukha-ātmakhyātir-avidyā ॥5॥

Ignorance is regarding the impermanent as permanent, the impure as pure, the painful as pleasant, and the non-Self as Self.

The term ‘Avidya’ is used to denote not just a lack or absence of knowledge but also "wrong knowledge". The example most commonly used to explain ‘Avidya’ is mistaking a rope for a snake in dim light and being afraid of it. As soon as proper light is brought to the area, the rope is revealed, the ‘avidya’ is removed and the fear is gone. In a similar manner, the darkness of ignorance clouds our view and we mistakenly identify the material aspect of our being, which includes the mind-body complex, as the true Self. It is this ignorance which gives rise to the ego and all the remaining kleshas as mentioned above.

Asmita (Ego) Sutra 2.6 दृग्दर्शनशक्त्योरेकात्मतेवास्मिता॥६॥

dr̥g-darśana-śaktyor-ekātmata-iva-asmitā ॥6॥

Asmita (Egoism) is the identification, as it were, of the power of the Seer (Purusha) with that of the instrument of seeing [body-mind].

The Sanskrit word ‘asmi’ means ‘I am ‘. Asmita means ‘I am-ness’ – identifying things with the ‘self’. It is this sense of "I am" and "mine" that makes us put labels on everything and also makes us judge everything. Asmita (ego) either lives in the past or the future. It is very uncomfortable in the present. It is the ego which creates the sense of attachment (raaga) and aversion (dvesha) based on a pleasant or an unpleasant experiences from the past. It is the ego which labels these experiences as such. Since the ego cannot live in the present, it does not allow us to accept things as they are. The acceptance comes only when we are able to live in the present moment.

Raaga (Attachment) and Dvesha (Aversion) Sutra 2.7 सुखानुशयी रागः॥७॥

sukha-anuśayī rāgaḥ ॥7॥

Attachment is that which follows identification with pleasurable experiences.

Sutra 2.8 दुःखानुशयी द्वेषः॥८॥

duḥkha-anuśayī dveṣaḥ ॥8॥

Aversion is that which follows identification with painful experiences.

What causes fear? Fear is the result of non-acceptance of reality as is. The reason why we are afraid of losing something that we possess is because we are too attached to it. Attachment comes from a previous pleasurable experience. Similarly, aversion comes about after an unpleasant experience. It is these strong likes and dislikes that create an environment of fear because we are too attached to the things that we like and have aversion to things that we don’t like.

Abhinivesha (Fear of Death) Sutra 2.9 स्वरसवाही विदुषोऽपि तथारूढो भिनिवेशः॥९॥

svarasvāhi viduṣo-‘pi samārūḍho-‘bhiniveśaḥ ॥9॥

Clinging to life, flowing by its own potency [due to past experience], exists even in the wise.

Fear is the most easily noticeable form of the kleshas. The term ‘abhinivesha’ is usually translated as ‘fear of death’ which further translates to ‘instinctive clinging to worldly life and physical enjoyments and the fear that one might get cut off from all of them due to death’. Fear of death is something that is common to everybody, including even the most ‘learned’ person. In our life, we develop all kinds of fear – fear of losing what we already possess, fear of not being able to get what we desperately seek, fear of not being able to get rid of what we totally dislike etc. We seem to be living in a constant state of fear. This, of course, is the most common form of suffering that we all have all the time.

In summary, Patanjali, through the theory of kleshas, provides us with an understanding of why and how we develop mental stress which leads to pain and suffering. In practical terms, as long as our actions are prompted by the ego and not by a pure intellect, we continue to suffer. As a remedy to end this ignorance, Patanjali prescribes the “eight limbs of yoga” which will lead to a sharp and pure intellect and consequently an end to the suffering.

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