i am loosing my teeth i have chomped all these days looking for self-sufficiency food i needed food i didn’t to fill a void and to help grow me driven to eat and eat and eat

i ate the food of idleness i ate the food of work i ate the food of consequences i ate the food of grace i ate many things and many people ingested them all grew from them all

shudder, shudder past went my skin writhing and wringing disoriented from shirking so much of what i once knew what i once thought i knew

alive i’m still alive with old skin gone, i’m still here i still eat

i eat memories i eat joy i eat sadness i eat confusion i eat love i eat life i eat battles i eat peace

i grow i shudder i disjoint, i remove my head

i cast aside old ways of thinking i begin anew again i see with sharpened gaze

i return to eat though my tooth is less sharp i don’t eat so many people i don’t eat so much out of selfish inclinations

but now i eat pain i eat hopes lost i eat death and sadness and expectations i eat disappoint and failure i eat age

shudder rid this hopeless skin i’m in rid these voices in my head

renewed once more i eat again

but my stomach craves what is pure this time it longs to feast on goodness

i find my new head thinks now of heavenly things

i eat grace i eat truth i eat justice and mercy i eat forgiveness i eat faithfulness and hope and purity

i eat everything He gives me and i long for more

i shudder. again? i find myself upside down yet again

i call out for Him to help me i arc myself in an effort for Him to see me

i find myself suffering once more curved and bent and upside down into the symbol that bears His name

i am dormant, but not really look closely see the quivering that. that is new life.

beginning again. not left, not forsaken

this time, i have lost my teeth. i have lost my head. but i still remember what i was and what i came from but that is no longer me.

for now, i soar. bound not to the earthly driven chomping of my youth no longer driven by selfish need or desire but driven to seek him to find Him to follow Him

i am a new creation. i can travel far further then before. i can go for thousands of miles. it is by his strength. by his love. by His design

i am free. i am created for this purpose the shuddering mattered the shuddering transformed me but now, free of what bound me,

i fly