Low self-esteem is practically an epidemic. We’re bombarded with images of impossible success and beauty on a daily basis. It’s hard to avoid making comparisons, and those comparisons never seem to work out in our favor.
Add to that a few mean comments received in childhood, a workplace bully, and a few extra pounds, and your self-esteem is in the toilet.
Recognize the signs of low self-esteem:
If you have a hard time hearing someone say something nice about you, you might be suffering from low self-esteem. Most people enjoy receiving a genuine compliment, but those with a low opinion of themselves feel very uncomfortable being on the receiving end of praise.
● Start by giving yourself compliments in the mirror. Keep doing this each day until the discomfort is greatly diminished.
● Next, ask people if they like your shoes, new haircut, or your brand-new gas grill. People will almost always say they do. Enjoy the compliments.
On the other hand, those with low self-esteem can’t handle criticism either. They tend to overreact and to take criticism too personally.
● Even constructive criticism is handled poorly. Do you bristle when someone offers a helpful suggestion for improvement? If so, your lack of self-esteem might be the reason.
● Ask someone for advice about how you could improve how you currently do something. Then, thank them for it and make good use of their feedback.
Low self-esteem and avoidance are commonly found together. Those with low self-esteem expect to fail, and who is going to try to do something if they expect failure?
● Do things that will likely result in failure and realize that it isn’t so bad. Apply for jobs you have little hope of landing. Ask out a stranger for coffee.
While compliments are hard to handle, who doesn’t like the gratitude of others? When people show appreciation to someone with low self-esteem, that appreciation is soaked up like a dry sponge soaks up water. People-pleasing is done to feel a sense of value and worth.
● Do what needs to be done without trying so hard to make others happy. Do something that makes YOU happy.
● That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t consider the negative impact your words or actions can have on other people.
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