How to quit (or limit) image-based social media | Exploring social media's impact on body image, and alternative platforms that offer connection without images.

Part 1 is a personal essay meant to link us in shared experiences about social media's impact on body image, Part 2 is a collection of affirmations that help me stay when navigating social media and Part 3 is a discussion on the latest approaches and news related to social media.

Some facts to keep in mind when scrolling:

• According to the latest data, the average amount of time spent on social media worldwide is set to hit 147 minutes, or two hours and 27 minutes, a day in 2022. Not only is this a two-minute increase on 2021 numbers, but it is also the highest ever recorded.

• Instagram’s own research found that the platform is making body issues worse for one in three teenage girls, mainly because Instagram contributes to unhealthy social comparisons among teens. Body image was the only area where teen girls who reported struggling with the issue said Instagram made it worse as compared to the other 11 well-being areas (like loneliness and sadness, which were improved by Instagram).

• I set up parental monitoring software on my device for 48 hours, with the only alerts requested to be around body image content. In just two days, the software analyzed 29K pieces of activity, and I got alerts about my activity saying gut health trends were trending. I’ll omit the actual specific one it flagged in case anyone gets any ideas — but the alert highlighted that it was “part of a long line of trends that can create disordered eating patterns in teens and tweens”. The other alert was for a rise in “body checking” trends, which the alert told me may appear innocent, but actively encourages users to focus on their body shape, or accentuate certain areas of the body using filters and baggy clothing. I also got an alert that my tone in emails was a bit negative, but that’s a whole different essay.

• Insider reported that “a small 2018 study found a correlation between time spent on social media, negative body image, and disordered eating. This was especially true if participants were scrolling through appearance-related content, like the account of a fitness instructor or model on Instagram.”

• Gospel of Wellness pointed me to a study titled, Fitspiration on Social Media, a content analysis, which found that “fitspiration” imagery over indexes thin, toned women more likely than men, and more likely to have their full bodies on display with their “buttocks emphasized”

• I spoke with Dr. Carl D. Marci, M.D., a physician-scientist and author of "Rewired: Protecting Your Brain in the Digital Age" to learn more about the link between digital images and IRL comparisons. He confirmed my gut feeling that “it is definitely true that idealized images are more damaging to body image than real-life experiences”.

• Perhaps that’s because most of the photos we’re seeing have been edited, per a 2017 Harris Poll, which found that nearly two-thirds of Americans edit their photos before posting.

• Interestingly enough, even the act of editing your own images can contribute to negative self-perception. Insider reported, “according to a 2022 review, the research found that taking and editing selfies was more harmful than posting them, perhaps because it allows you to focus on — and try to fix — your flaws.”

How to do image-based social media better:

• Marie Kondo your feed — if it doesn’t bring you joy, get it out of your feed. You can unfollow accounts that are bringing you down, or if you’re worried about causing a tiff with a friend, opt to “mute” them. You can pick if you want stories, posts, or both muted. Instagram won’t notify the person that you’ve chosen to take a break from their content.

• Keep your network tight. Remove followers you don’t recognize regularly, and keep the circle to people who you know aren’t judging you — the ones that like you for you. You may feel way less pressure to get your images just right, and maybe even enjoy sharing.

• Remove image-based social media apps from your home screen, and ask your phone not to suggest the apps. Sometimes I’ll remove Instagram altogether from my device to give myself a week's break. If I really need to get on, I’ll use the mobile browser version, which is far less “sticky” than the app version. My account is still intact when I return, and I’m usually less “addicted” to it for a few months because I’ve gotten better at finding things to do when moments of boredom strike.

• Find accounts that align with your values around things like body image and food. Note that these will likely change over time if you constantly practice releasing what’s no longer serving you.

• Share, and get out of there, fast. This might sound narcissistic but I don’t look at many people’s posts. I just post (without giving myself too much time to think about my appearance) and get out as fast as possible. I know I’ll be happy to have some photos later, but I don’t need to sit in icky feelings if I don’t like the way I look, or waste too much time on getting the shot instead of enjoying the moment that was picture worthy in the first place. I also like to take real photos with my phone vs. in social apps, that way I’m not pressured to share them while I’m enjoying a fun moment.

Alternatives to image-based social media:

Social media can cause a lot of dysfunction — that is real. But it’s not the whole story. Being social is part of being human, and there are some innovative ways to connect in a more conscious way — without relying on sharing images as the main way to connect.

• Whatsapp — just text it. Most of the time, the people I really want to share things with are just a text away, and I get way more interaction, comments, and feedback when I just share a video, thought, or photo directly with the group. Take the time to set up chats with people you care about most — friends from work, mom friends, immediate family, cousins, creative friends, etc. so you can deepen the conversations based on your shared interests and common ground.

• Substack is my favorite of all for right now. There are so many great authors to draw knowledge and relatable experiences from, and within each one, an engaged community of like-minded people all commenting and sharing their experiences. My favorites are listed on my substack. These ideas around body image have been discussed a lot in the last few years. Because I'm so new to finding my post-recovery voice, flab isn't really to a point where I'm sharing "my" ideas -- just helpful ideas that worked for me and helped me recover. Many were absorbed by subscribing to these authors. Just reading (especially this far) is a form of activism for this cause, and you should pat yourself on the back for taking the time to give this topic the attention it deserves. I encourage you to get the Substack app to make the experience as sticky as Instagram. I get way more out of a 5 min read of any of these newsletters than I do out of 5 minutes of scrolling.

• Good Inside — I first joined this network for advice and workshops, but have stayed for the community. The support and speed of feedback I get from other parents are so much more helpful than trying to infer what I should be doing based on the seemingly perfect moments I see on Instagram. They even have a section of “common threads” that show just how active the community is — there’s even a collection of body image-related threads from the community that you can join in on.

• OnBeing Retreats, the next one kicks off Nov. 15 at 5 p.m. ET. The virtual gathering will explore the big questions of meaning at the intersection of spiritual inquiry, science, social healing, and the arts, such as: what does it mean to be human? How do we want to live? Who will we be to each other? I’ll be at the upcoming one if you want to join me!

• Sessions by Masterclass — unlock new skills with a structured 30-day curriculum. This qualifies as a “social network” because the new feature allows you to get feedback and stay inspired from a supportive community, submit your projects and receive feedback from a trained Teaching Assistant, who can get all your questions answered — no matter how big or small.

• Ask Diem — a new search engine for women. A dedicated place for people to search, collect, discover and share information with each other, inspired by the way women have been passing knowledge to each other for centuries. Think of it like the best and biggest group chat you’ve ever been a part of, where all the important, silly, quick, private, and frenetic knowledge you share is organized and stored for everyone to benefit from.

• Blast Radio — I’m trying my hand at audio creation and adding read-alouds to my newsletter. But, in between issues, I’ll be speaking my mind (without any images!) via live radio broadcasts at blastradio.com/flab. Think of these as audio-only IG stories that expire after 24 hrs. I’ll be sharing playlists, expanded thoughts on posts, and more. Download the app here for the best experience and to get a notification when I go live. Disclaimer, this is a brand I represent in my day job as a publicist, but I’m sharing because I genuinely love creating on this platform.

• Best of all, practice social connection IRL with OnBeing’s Guide to Better Conversations. This guide will help you connect with a group of friends in a conversation that might take place over weeks or months and serves as a flexible roadmap you can adapt for your group.

Go image free with flab:

If you want a guarantee to never come across an image of someone else’s body, or stumble across tips for what to eat, how to move, or how to change your appearance, stay tuned into flab. Here are all the ways to connect:

• I’ve shuttered the IG account, instead, follow along on Twitter @flabwellness.

• Live radio (no images!) broadcasts at blastradio.com/flab.

• Subscribe to the flab podcast on Apple Podcast or check out the feed here.

• Subscribe to the flab newsletter via Substack below.

Until next time, be well, like the real kind of well.

Get full access to flab at www.flabwellness.com/subscribe