I Could Talk to You All Day: Recent Episodes
I Could Talk to You All Day
I Could Talk to You All Day is a podcast for executives and emerging leaders, hosted by Executive Leadership Coaches Lauren Lefkowitz and John Spears. This isn’t just any leadership podcast - it's real talk about what it’s actually like to be a leader. We’re not here to talk AT you about what statistics say or what studies show. We’re here to have a candid conversation with you about what it’s really like to be a leader while also being human.
Grab a cup of coffee and join us for raw, vulnerable conversations about the challenges - and awesomeness - of being an executive or emerging leader.
Masking is something we all do - putting on a 'face' to avoid showing . . . something. It can be really hard to get vulnerable, to risk our senses of security and control and our search for external approval. Join the conversation as John and Lauren talk about masking and unmasking, and why it's worth the risk!
It's the Season 1 finale (after a year and a half and 35 episodes) of the podcast! If you've missed past episodes, take a look-back during the break and get caught up!
And make sure to connect with the hosts of I Could Talk to You All Day:
John Spears: https://www.linkedin.com/in/johnjspears/ and https://www.instagram.com/john_spears.coach/
Lauren Lefkowitz: https://www.linkedin.com/in/laurenlefkowitz/ and https://www.instagram.com/lauren.coach.fineisatrap/
High-achievers are often great decision-makers...for their work, the people they serve, and the responsibilities they have. But when it comes to making decisions for themselves (ourselves...John and Lauren are not exempt from this!) high-achievers often sit in indecision, or avoid allowing themselves to make decisions in service of their own development or futures. Join the conversation as we talk about this phenomenon and how we work to make hard decisions for ourselves.
High achievers are amazing at smushing down feelings so they can get. things. done. But what happens when it's time to actually confront our feelings, explore how we want to BE with our feelings and find growth in expressing and sorting through our feelings? Join the conversation as we explore this!
Ick, right? We know. When we try to bring up the mushy topics in our busy corporate lives, our brains reaaaallly want to shut us down. Join the conversation as John and Lauren talk in this episode about how actually looking at self-love in a healthy (and even practical) way can be productive, even for busy leaders.
On this episode, John and Lauren talk about coaching--how each of them got into coaching, got their own coaches, and the value they've each gotten (and you might get) from being coached. And of course, you'll get stories of growing (and resisting growth) and a story or two about what's happening in your hosts' lives.
When we talk about all of the doing we do, we often find ourselves in reactive mode, trying to catch up, get through, finish things. So much of the time, well-being comes secondary to all of the things we have to get done...or it doesn't factor in at all. Join the conversation as we talk about the opportunity for well-being and how to factor that into your own well-being and also your team's.
On this podcast, there are a lot of conversations about being! And also, the order in which we execute on our lives matters. Most of us live in reactive/doing mode a lot of the time. But if we start from being, then the way we do things, and the things we have from doing, can be so much more powerful! Join the conversation as we discuss the do/have/be model versus the be/do/have model and how incredible coming from being first can be!
On this podcast, much of the conversation focuses on BEING even more than DOING. But doing is a huge part of being a leader who's also a human! On this episode, John and Lauren talk about combining the being and doing to take action and get results. And yes, it involves being brave enough to ask for help.
The topic of curiosity has been woven into so many I Could Talk to You All Day episodes, but this is the first time it's been a standalone topic. Join the conversation as we talk about what curiosity even is, how we lose our capacity for it as adults and how to start thinking about bringing curiosity into your life.
We all get stuck and it's easy to not notice when we are...or to notice and try to ignore it...or to notice and feel like we don't have a choice. But what happens when you're a high achiever and you're ready to get unstuck, and you just don't know how? Join the conversation as we discuss our own versions of stuckness, how we've each recognized it for ourselves, and how we've each gotten unstuck.
It can be super isolating and lonely to be in leadership, especially as you climb into the executive suite. Sometimes, it's the kind of job you have that makes you feel isolated -- like human resources, operations, or finance. Other times, the feeling of loneliness can come from thinking you're the only high achiever who feels like things are hard. The truth is that none of us has to be in isolation if we want to find community, peers, and support. We simply need to know where to get started to find it.
This episode starts with Lauren talking about a difficult conversation she had with herself...and her coach. John and Lauren talk about the reframe from "difficult" to "brave" conversations and how having these conversations is a kindness--to ourselves and our teams. Join the conversation about how to be in these conversations in a productive, kind, and courageous way!
You know when your car is out of alignment and you hang onto the steering wheel, turning it in an awkward position just to keep your car straight? Your life works the same way! When you're out of alignment in your life--due to a lack of boundaries, or people pleasing, or in a job or career you're not enjoying, or missing out on the fun things you want to do--you may be hanging onto your own steering wheel, trying to keep your life straightened out. Join the conversation as we talk about how we get out of alignment, and how to start finding our way back into alignment.
When something happens that forces us to change, we get resilient, because we're high achievers and we love a challenge! But what happens when we don't have to choose change? What about the times when things could be better, but there's no specific punishment, emergency, or urgency for keeping things in inertia? When things are just ok, or less than ok, but not horrible, it can be harder to choose change. Join the conversation as we talk about deciding to make changes when we don't have to, simply because we want better for ourselves.
Change is flying at us from all directions, especially during the last few years! From political changes to the pandemic, the job market to the real estate market, and everything in between, we're learning that the only thing we can count on is that nothing is constant...except change! Join the conversation as Lauren and John talk about reacting and responding, and being in choice, when change comes.
You know that voice in your head that tells you to do things automatically? The one that tells you that you need to be perfect or pleasing or work harder or be less or be more? That's your survival mechanism at work. Join the conversation as John and Lauren talk about their survival mechanisms (getting extra vulnerable!) and how they can help and hinder us in our everyday lives.
In this episode, John gets extra vulnerable, real, and raw by volunteering to be coached by Lauren in real time. If you've ever wondered what an executive coaching conversation is like, this conversation is a peek into what it's like to coach and be coached.
The more we experience in life, the harder we tend to cling to our comfort zones. But how often are our comfort zones actually still comfortable versus just what we know? Join the conversation as we talk about our comfort zones, choosing to get out of them, and hear a little bit about how Lauren slipped back into one of her former comfort zones right before this episode was recorded.
We are born and bred to be doers. We do school work and activities and then we grow and we have responsibilities - jobs and families and volunteering and and and... Underneath all of the doing - under the tasks and responsibilities and goals and milestones of the things we accomplish - we are in a constant state of being. Join the conversation as we talk about what it means to 'be' and some ways we've found to talk about, and find our best ways of, being.
New year, new you? Or new year, lots of pressure on yourself to fix everything you think is wrong with you? In this conversation, John and Lauren talk about approaching the new year with intention, instead of resolutions. We start with a little reflection on our last episode, Endings, and talk about how we're looking at the new year.
What does the year ending do for you (or to you)? On this episode, we discuss how we both view the ending of the year, how the year unexpectedly went for each of us, and lessons learned. Join the conversation as we get extra vulnerable about our experiences with the year coming to an end.
We get to a certain age when we consider ourselves grown up and somehow, we forget that we're still allowed to play. Join the conversation as we talk about why play is important for adults, why we think play stops as we get older, and some ways to start incorporating play into your life!
You don't have to love small talk to enjoy networking! Networking can be an amazing way to build relationships inside and outside your company, help you find new jobs, succeed in your current job, and build really interesting friendships. Join the conversation as we talk about why networking matters and how to get started.
We learn to manage down, up, and over, and that's great for getting things done, but there aren't a lot of conversations, books, or trainings on building relationships beyond the task work. Join us as we talk about where good relationships with others start, why we need relationships beyond the transactions, and how to get started on building relationships. And, we veer a little off the track to talk about joy and anxiety.
Setting boundaries is both about saying yes to new opportunities and perspectives and also about learning to say no to things in order to protect our time and energy. In Part 2 of our episodes about boundaries, we're talking about choosing to say no. Join the conversation as we explore how we each learned to work up the courage to say no, what that changed for us, and how we each say the actual 'no' when we need to or want to.
Choosing our boundaries isn't something that gets formally taught to us as we grow up, go through school, and start to work. We learn to behave, listen, respect authority, and do things for others. But what happens when you haven't learned to set boundaries? You (we) live a life simply responding to demands and reacting to chaos. Many of us learn that our work lives, in particular, don't get to have boundaries...until, that is, we decide to get deliberate about choosing, setting, expanding, and in some cases, contracting our boundaries. Join us for Part 1 (of 2) as we talk about choosing our boundaries.
When you hear someone say, "Bring your whole self to work!" do you think, "Yeah, right! There's no way I'm doing that"? As leaders, we work to compartmentalize ourselves so that we don't let our personal lives get in the way, don't show our vulnerabilities, and don't let anyone think we can't do everything, all of the time. But, being able to be our whole selves at work can be very freeing, as we (John and Lauren) have learned throughout our careers and lives. Join the conversation as we talk about what it means to be authentic, why we try to censor ourselves, and what the risks and rewards are of bringing authenticity into the room.
We're back to the conversation about Executive Presence with a conversation about self-kindness and self-compassion. It's so easy to be kind and compassionate to others, but for ourselves? It's much easier to see the negative, critique our own performance, and be much harder on ourselves than we would dare be with anyone else. In this conversation, we explore what has us being so hard on ourselves and we talk about some ways to look at opportunities for self-kindness and self-compassion.
Another buzz phrase enters the career arena...quiet quitting. Some define is as the more classic 'active disengagement', while others are coining this new phrase as 'no longer going above and beyond' (also known as 'doing your job'). In this episode, we get into the real talk about what the second definition of quiet quitting is about, why it's so damaging to hard workers and high achievers, and how to start looking at taking control of your own boundaries in your career.
As we continue our conversation about executive presence, and talk about how much more than what you look like, how you speak, and what you wear it actually is, we move to courage. In this episode join us as we explore fear vs. resilience vs. courage - and what it actually takes to take those small - and sometimes big - steps to become the leaders and humans we want to be.
Ugh, vulnerability, right?!? We know. We have lived in the ick of hiding behind the things that made us feel vulnerable - as leaders, as employees, as business owners, as friends, and as family members. And also, we've both taken the plunge into getting really vulnerable - with colleagues, bosses, family, and beyond.
Join the conversation as we talk about why we hesitate to get even the least bit vulnerable, what is scary about deciding to test out vulnerability, and how rewarding it can be when we step out of our comfort zones and into letting ourselves be human about...well, being human.
What does the term 'executive presence' mean to you? Does it make you shudder, thinking about trying to fit into the image of the classic suited up executive who is, frankly, not someone who looks like or acts like you? shivers down spine
Join the conversation as we talk about some classic ideas about what executive presence has meant in the past and what we think it means now (and while we hate to spoil all of the surprises in the conversation, we'll tell you this: having executive presence isn't about wearing a suit).
It's been one week since SCOTUS announced the reversal of Roe v. Wade.
In this special episode, join us for some vulnerable conversation about what this reversal means to each of us, to the people around us, and what it's like to be a leader during a time when no one knows exactly what the right thing is to do. Spoiler alert: there's no one right way.
We just couldn't wait until our next scheduled episode to get this conversation out.
Sure, you're tired. We're all tired, right? But, how do you know when tired turns to exhaustion and exhaustion becomes burnout? And what do you actually do about it? Hang out with us as we explore burnout. Hear about each of our experiences with it: how we ended up there, when and how we recognized it, and what we've done to overcome burnout and find balance and fun.
You're an amazing storyteller! Do you know how we know? Because we're amazing storytellers, too!
All day, we're observing what we're doing, how we're doing, who is judging us, how we're judging ourselves, what that look from your boss meant, why that board member was yawning while you were talking, what the tone of the email from that project manager means, how the tone of your email came across, whether you're succeeding or failing, doing too much or not enough, and, and, and...
Exhausting, right? Join the conversation as we talk about separating fact from interpretation, distinguishing what's actually happening from the stories we make up in our heads.
The pressure we put on ourselves to perform is very real. We get stuck in perfectionism, doing it 'right', and not disappointing the people around us. Never has this been more real for us than in recording the first episode of I Could Talk to You All Day! Listen to the conversation about the pressure to perform, and how the self-imposed pressure to perform led to us hilariously scrapping and rerecording the first episode of this podcast. We're talking about not just what the attachment to performance does to us and how we both find ways to overcome our tendencies toward performing!
About the Podcast
I Could Talk to You All Day is a podcast for executives and emerging leaders, hosted by Executive Leadership Coaches Lauren Lefkowitz and John Spears. This isn’t just any leadership podcast - this is real talk about what it’s actually like to be a leader. We’re not here to talk AT you about what statistics say or what studies show. We’re here to have a candid conversation with you about what it’s really like to be a leader while also being human.
Grab a cup of coffee and join us for raw, vulnerable conversations about the challenges - and awesomeness - of being an executive or emerging leader. And yes, we’ll also make it funny.
It’s time to make the shift from just getting by in your job to creating and living the career and life you’ve always dreamed of.
About the Hosts
Lauren Lefkowitz is an executive leader with a background in the retail, investment, and nonprofit sectors, and is a recovering workaholic, perfectionist and people pleaser. She untangled from 80+ hour work weeks and being the Vice President of Whatever-You-Need, and created a life and career she loves and thrives in. Lauren knows that ‘fine’ is a trap and she partners with clients to break the work, sleep, repeat cycle and create careers - and lives - full of choice, balance, challenge, and fun.
John Spears is an executive leader who has served at the highest levels in politics, government and the non-profit sectors. He has emerged from playing small, getting caught up in the inertia of life and people pleasing, and now lives a powerfully authentic life. John partners with his clients to get clear about what they want, develop the courage to make bold choices and finally live the life they’ve always wanted.