Self-Caregiving Strategies Podcast: Recent Episodes
Alison van Schie & Theresa Wilbanks
Welcome to the 'Self-Caregiving Strategies podcast' where Theresa Wilbanks and Alison van Schie, both Certified Caregiving Consultants, explore the 12 Strategies for Sustainable Caregiving. These strategies were developed by Theresa and originated from her caregiving experience as she looked after her dad for the last 7 years of his life. When the challenges of caregiving began to impact her physical and emotional well-being, she knew that the path she was on was not sustainable and she needed a new approach to caregiving before becoming completely overwhelmed and burnt out. By asking herself: “What Am I Feeling?” “Why Am I Feeling this way?” and “How can I feel better?” she developed these strategies. Theresa and Alison will be discussing one strategy per episode throughout the limited series. We invite you to submit your questions or comments as there will be occasion to devote an episode to addressing your feedback.
These strategies and discussions are presented to provide a perspective that will enhance your caregiving experience and can be incorporated into your daily life to help you prioritize your well-being, help you cope better and avoid burnout. Not all strategies will be applicable to your situation right now, but hearing what they are and remembering that they exist will help when you need them. The strategies are:
- Setting and reinforcing boundaries
· Developing mindfulness and awareness
· Cultivating our capacity for compassion, importantly self-compassion
· Re-imagining and micro-dosing self-care
· Accepting the role and the gifts that it offers
· Accepting help and using the bonus time for self-care
· Discovering the power of accepting alternatives
· Embracing and transforming obstacles
· Venting and releasing the pressure
· Journaling to process the emotions
· Forgiving to free your mind and heart
· Planning and preparing
· And a bonus strategy – Embracing the routine
As we talk about managing the uncomfortable emotions many face during caregiving, we visit the strategy of releasing the build-up of pressure by venting to avoid reaching our boiling point. By venting we are able to release some of the stress, the frustrations and the worries. This may sound simple, but there are reasons why it can be difficult and we explore some of the reasons why it is hard, but so necessary.
Have you ever just felt like screaming out loud to release some of the frustration you are experiencing? In this episode you will hear how beneficial this can be. We'll guide you in your exploration to find a safe place and way for venting. So come along on this episode with us to hear more about venting with the hope that you will feel validated, connected and not alone.
A couple of references for this episode include the podcast Theresa mentioned: The Art of Holding Space
Matt Kahn’s book - All for Love: The Transformative Power of Holding Space
The Caregiving Years Training Academy Directory of Certified Caregiving Consultants
Our episode sponsor Alongside Caregiver Consulting
Music Credits: Beautiful Piano by LesFM | https://lesfm.net/piano-background-music/ Music promoted by https://www.chosic.com/free-music/all/ Creative Commons CC BY 3.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/
Overcoming obstacles is empowering - transforming them is taking this empowerment to the next level! In this episode Theresa and Alison discuss how we can use obstacles to our advantage and how by doing so we are empowered.
In caregiving there are many obstacles. We encounter them within the systems we must navigate through. Our friends, family members and even our care recipient can present obstacles for us. There is hope though and we can become stronger by leaning into obstacles, tune in to hear more.
Thank you to this episode's sponsor Susanne White of Caregiver Warrior and Susanne's book is now available "Self-Care for Caregivers: a practical guide to caring for you while you care for your loved one"
And for more on the "compassionate scientist" we spoke about - you can listen to Jodi Kay Benusa on "Stop, Pause and Reflect" on the Island Treasures podcast for Caregivers.
This episode's strategy is all about discovering the power of accepting alternatives. By accepting alternatives we learn how to align our path with our family member and work in concert toward the same objectives; and we explore what those objectives may look like - including ultimately focusing on the destination - beginning with the end in mind.
We explore when winning is losing and not winning at all, and how we may be able to find happiness in the present moment so that we can maximize memories and minimize regrets... all while winning.
We talk about how ego enters the equation as does our own tight grip on our goals; and once we loosen our grip we see there are other alternatives that may provide a win-win outcome along with an improved relationship with our care-recipient.
Theresa shares wisdom from David Solie's book: How to Say It to Seniors: Closing the Communication Gap with Our Elders
Thank you to this episode's sponsor Geriatrx.
As a self-caregiving strategy, accepting help is vital. We can't do it all ourselves - not without consequences. Accepting help can free up some of our time and energy so we can use it on our own self-care.
It is not easy to accept help or even ask for help and we explore some of the reasons for this reluctance. We discuss different types of help available including agencies and informal resources.
We explore what respite looks like and how beneficial it may be to check out options before they are needed urgently.
Theresa and Alison hope that by listening to this episode you will be open to accepting help and freeing up some of your time and energy to focus on your own well-being. Accepting help may require taking a baby step to delegate one task at a time.
And here's the article Alison mentioned called "Asking For Help to Relieve Caregiver Stress".
In this episode we talk about accepting the role of caregiver and finding the gifts that may be hidden or disguised within some of the challenges or struggles we are facing; or even our own resistance to accepting the very role we are in.
Theresa learned not only how to accept the role of caregiver, but how to embrace it, which she found empowering. She learned that by releasing her resistance to accepting the role she was able to reduce her stress. Through applying this strategy, Theresa was able to turn many of her caregiving realities into gifts and you'll hear all about these gifts in this episode.
If you find yourself in the midst of caregiving or just dipping your toes in the waters of caregiving, you will want to hear how you can take back control and thrive in your role as a caregiver. By reframing the experience you may want to start collecting your own souvenirs along your caregiving journey.
Thank you to this episode's sponsor, Linda Burhans of Connecting Caregivers Radio
This episode helps us stay connected to our compassion, especially our self-compassion. For if we find we are no longer behaving or acting in accordance with our values we suffer stress and regret as compassion has been depleted... or has oozed out.
We talk about "compassion fatigue" and "plugging your bucket". If these terms aren't familiar to you - we will be explaining them in the episode.
There is good news: we talk about how to reconnect to our compassion so we can rebuild our compassion reserves and our actions can once again come from our heart.
Be sure to check out this episode's sponsor is Joe & Bella Inc.
Self-Care.
Self-care can look different during caregiving and may be difficult to prioritize. In this episode we will look at reimagining self-care activities so we can fit 5, 10 or 15 minute blocks of self-care into our day. We look at what renews our energy and what activities we find calming and relaxing - and how to keep connected to our passions and creativity through self-care.
Be sure to check out this episode's sponsor Healthy Happy Caregiver. Among their many resources and services, they offer a great tool for managing your own self-care.
If you struggle to prioritize your own self-care this episode is a must-listen-to episode and remember, it's not selfish to care for yourself!
What is mindfulness and how does it relate to self-caregiving? Mindfulness is the glue that connects all the self-caregiving strategies together. It helps keep us grounded, focusing on the present so that we don't ruminate or worry about the future or past which can lead to stress and burnout.
How do we cultivate mindfulness? You will hear about many forms of meditation. We talk about prayer, curiosity, stillness and breathing exercises as ways to cultivate this helpful strategy. It may take effort, but it is certainly worth exploring the benefits with Theresa and Alison in this episode.
This episode is sponsored by Sustainable Caregiving with music credits as follows: Weekend by LesFM https://lesfm.net/acoustic-background-music/ Music promoted by https://www.chosic.com/free-music/all/ Creative Commons CC BY 3.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/
Theresa outlines why setting boundaries is such an important Self-Caregiving strategy. Boundaries help us protect our physical and emotional wellbeing and provide a way to respect and protect ourselves and others.
Join us as we explore why setting boundaries can be difficult and as we answer questions such as: How do we set boundaries? Who should be included and considered when we set boundaries? How do we start the process and the conversation?
This episode's sponsor is CircleOf the creator of the Family Caregiver App CircleOf.
Theresa and Alison, both certified caregiving consultants and business owners, introduce themselves and provide an overview of each of the 12 Self-Caregiving Strategies that will be discussed in the limited series podcast. There are actually 13 strategies as we've added a bonus strategy that ties all the strategies together. Whether you're entrenched in caregiving or just dipping your toes into the waters of the caregiver river, you'll want to tune in to see which of the strategies could benefit you most at the place you are now in your caregiving journey.
Combining caregiving and self-care, this limited podcast series offers strategies for the listener to apply to both caregiving and everyday life. Theresa Wilbanks will present one of her 12 Sustainable Caregiver Strategies each episode and she and Alison van Schie, both Certified Caregiving Consultants, will discuss the strategy for the listener to think about and use when needed.
The podcast episodes will air every first and third Tuesday of the month with the introductory episode due to launch July 5th, 2022, be sure to subscribe so you won't miss the first or any of the subsequent episodes.