Moments of Authenticity: Recent Episodes

Amber Boyd, LMFT

As a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, I discuss topics such as perfectionism, depression, and anxiety, not only with my clients but also with my friends, family, and colleagues. I discuss some of the concerns that come up and ways to engage with them as our most authentic selves!

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Ever feel like you’re losing control of everything? I know the feeling. Join me in this eye-opening episode of “Moments of Authenticity” as I dive deep into the struggles and triumphs of my healing journey after a major surgery. We’ll explore the hard truth about control and why it’s sometimes necessary to let go and accept what we can’t change.

  • The Hard Truth About Control. Discover why trying to control everything is a losing battle.
  • My Personal Healing Story. Hear about my recent hysterectomy and the six to eight-week recovery that left me feeling powerless.
  • Emotional Rollercoaster. How not being able to work out, clean up, or even lift heavy things made me feel frustrated and helpless.
  • Pain and Mindset. Learn why pushing through pain isn’t always the best approach and how my mindset shifted during recovery.
  • The Power of Language. Why the words you use about what you can and cannot do matter more than you think.
  • Giving Yourself Grace. The importance of self-compassion and patience when life doesn’t go as planned.

Timestamps

  • [00:05] Discussion on the theme of control, related to personal healing after a hysterectomy.
  • [01:00] Frustration with the inability to perform usual activities, like working out, after surgery.
  • [02:21] Adjusting to physical limitations and the impact on mental health.
  • [04:00] Mindset shift regarding control and acknowledging limitations.
  • [06:40] Validation of one’s efforts and the importance of recognizing progress.
  • [07:12] The importance of language and mindset in dealing with limitations.
  • [07:50] The challenge of maintaining agency despite physical limitations.
  • [09:50] Avoiding the all-or-nothing mindset and exploring what is within one’s control.
  • [10:15] Adjusting activities to fit current abilities and recognizing personal agency.
  • [11:00] The importance of not falling into cognitive distortions and maintaining a balanced perspective.
  • [11:30] Physical relaxation techniques to help cope with the feeling of losing control.

Notable Quotes

  • “I’m used to pushing through the pain. And that’s something to really take inventory of, because in my mind, I’m like, ‘You just gotta keep pushing, you gotta keep going, you gotta keep doing those things’. And I tell my clients all the time, you can’t ignore those things, or they will come back full force.”
  • “Not having control over when the pain is going to come or how the pain is going to come, not that I could control that anyway, but that’s just something I, in my mind, I felt like I needed to control.”
  • “My control, or my desire for control, is a matter of mindset.”
  • “The things that you tell yourself, you can’t do right now or can’t do any more, the idea that you can still do things and still reach goals, like you’re still getting results, they just don’t always look like the package that you want them to look in. So, make sure that you’re honoring that piece.”
  • “I take away my own agency, when I only mentioned what I cannot do.”
  • “I will challenge you or charge you to look at the language that you use around what you can and cannot do. And it’s actually can you or can you not do that? Or is it more like, you can’t do that right now, because those are two different things.”
  • “Are we doing more damage to ourselves telling ourselves we need to be somewhere that we’re not yet or that we’re not like that place is not accessible to us at all? And having to shift and pivot? Are we giving ourselves credit to be there? Because I don’t always and I know that for myself.”
  • “Give yourself more grace.”
  • “Allow yourself to unfold your arms, unclench your jaw, and remove your shoulders from your cheeks. Because what you feel like you can’t control right now, you’re taking away from the things that you actually can control.”

Music by: Noir Et Blanc Vie

Moments of Authenticity

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram | Facebook | Website | Youtube | Spotify | Apple

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Welcome back to another episode! In this episode, we dive into the concept of “Hidden Blessings.”

Have you ever felt frustrated when things don’t go as planned? Do you find yourself struggling with setbacks? Sometimes, these setbacks are actually blessings in disguise. I’ll share personal experiences and insights on how unexpected inconveniences can help realign us with our true paths. Join me as we explore the importance of being present and appreciating the journey. This episode is all about finding gratitude in the unexpected.

Timestamps

[00:41] Unexpected Inconvenience and Personal Story

[03:41] Importance of Timing and Patience

[05:41] Rethinking Grind Culture

[08:06] Balancing Helping Others with Self-Care

[09:01] Advocating for Personal Health Decisions

[10:51] Gratitude and Reframing Experiences

Notable Quotes

  • “Sometimes we get inundated with an idea that something not working out is for our worst good. And I think that sometimes things don’t work out for our best good, right?”
  • “Sometimes the unexpected inconvenience can jumpstart or reinvigorate the path that you’re meant to be on.”
  • “Sometimes you don’t get where you’re going fast because you need to be where you are right this moment.”
  • “Grind culture will have you thinking that you’re doing and you’re, you’re not doing enough, and yet, you could be doing entirely too much.”
  • “When you are constantly trying to be alive for others, you have to realize when it’s time to shine a light back into your life and your space.”
  • “Being very cognizant of rushing into a burning building, and that person is already standing outside.”
  • “I feel like although it is happening at a time, that is much different than when I advocated for myself the first time, it is now taking place. And it’s now, I think, a ‘better circumstances situation’ outside of insurance.”
  • “I’m grateful that some things did not work out, like who I thought I was going to be with at this point in time.”
  • “It’s okay to take a pause for the cause and really reevaluate and take inventory of where you’re at this very moment.”
  • “Sometimes, I think maybe things aren’t supposed to happen fast. Because you need to be in this present moment.”

Music by: Noir Et Blanc Vie

Moments of AuthenticityEmail: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram | Facebook | Website | Youtube | Spotify | Apple

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Ever found yourself torn between following your intuition and rationalizing your decisions? Have you ever wondered about the power of gut feelings in guiding your life’s path? This "Moments of Authenticity" episode explores the transformative journey of trusting our inner voice. Join me as we navigate one of the most vulnerable episodes I’ve done to date, exploring twists and turns of intuition and heart-led choices, and uncovering the profound impact they can have on our lives.

What’s Covered:

  • Going on a soulful trip to the Rhythm of Life Conference in New Jersey, guided by my inner voice.
  • Discovering inspiration and connection with friends like Dr. Erica Dawkins and colleague Chanel McCord, LPC at the conference.
  • Extending my travels to California to reunite with family before a significant surgery.
  • Reflecting on the sudden loss of a dear Sorority Sister, Ophelia Mattox, and the lessons learned about cherishing every moment.
  • Embracing gratitude and the transformative power of listening to our instincts in life’s twists and turns.

Join me for a deep dive into the journey of trusting your gut and stepping into your destiny. Don’t miss out on the heartfelt reflections and powerful insights shared in this episode of "Moments of Authenticity."

Timestamps

[00:00] An overview of my recent extensive travels, highlighting the significant experiences and insights I gained along the way.

[02:05] Reconnecting with Dr. Erica Dawkins, a valued Sorority Sister and accountability partner, fostering meaningful discussions and camaraderie.

[04:52] Participating in a panel discussion at Chanel McCord, LPC’s conference, offering a platform to exchange ideas and insights with fellow professionals.

[08:49] Booking a flight to California to visit family and the significance of this decision.

[10:51] Following intuition and saying goodbye to a dear friend.

Notable Quotes

“I felt like I needed to be there, I could not really pinpoint why I needed to be there. But it felt like a necessity. And so I followed my intuition. I followed my gut.”

“To see each individual person, the ones who were there, discuss what their chapter was about, it felt like it also gave me strength, to continue to stand in my truth. And that my whatever I have to share is important. And I am in so much gratitude for each lady who I got a chance to sit next to who I got to hear their story, even in that small amount of time.”

“So whenever I question why something, like, something in my gut is telling me I need to show up. I’m trying to be there. And I hope that you’ll take away from this episode, that same feeling. So, when you feel a shift in your spirit, in your heart, or your gut, make it.”

“Because no matter how long I’ve been in mental health, that doesn’t mean that I haven’t impacted people negatively. I recognize that, like there is power and accountability.”

“If you know or think you’re supposed to be somewhere, and it’s going to be to your best benefit, do it. Don’t ignore it. It’s important. And I don’t think that we do that enough, because we’re so concerned about the ifs, buts, and whatever the case may be – the should’ve, would’ve, could’ve.”

“I hope that you listen to your instinct. I hope you listen to your gut and your discernment. It’s telling you something.”

“Sometimes you got to make that move even when it doesn’t seem or sound convenient. Sometimes you have to make decisions and sacrifices that you don’t know are going to be for your best good, but it’s moving you in that direction.”

Music by: Noir Et Blanc Vie

Moments of Authenticity

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram | Facebook | Website | Youtube | Spotify | Apple

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Do you find yourself constantly fixing things for others? Always the hero swooping in to catch people when they fall? While well-intentioned, this “airbag” role can backfire — both for you and those you’re trying to protect. This episode digs into why you can’t save everyone and how to set healthy boundaries while still being a supportive presence in others’ lives.

In this episode, I’ll talk about:

  • The connection between people-pleasing and a need to feel safe and needed.
  • What “fawning” is and how it can be harmful.
  • Why trying to shield people from challenges robs them of growth.
  • The difference between genuine support and enabling.
  • How to prioritize your own well-being without feeling guilty.

Ready to break free from the people-pleasing trap and ditch the airbag role? Tune in to this month’s episode of Moments of Authenticity for insightful tips and an honest discussion on establishing healthier relationships.

Timestamps

[00:05] The challenges of always being the “airbag” for others, especially from the perspective of a people-pleaser.

[00:56] Discusses the intention to protect others from negative experiences but acknowledges that we can’t remove someone’s agency or opportunities to learn.

[02:22] The distinction between helping someone with a need versus preventing them from taking responsibility for their own life and growth.

[03:52] Examining your own desire to be needed or a hero, and whether the focus should actually be on the other person.

[05:19] Accept that not everyone has good intentions and that sometimes people take advantage of your willingness to help.

[06:21] The toll of overextending yourself for others. You must care for yourself first to meaningfully help anyone else.

[07:32] Supporting others who truly cannot help themselves versus those who simply choose not to.

[08:51] Are you the only option? Questioning why you’re always the go-to savior. Allowing others to learn and solve problems creates growth.

Notable Quotes

  • “You can’t be everyone’s airbag.”
  • “I think that we can be mindful, and we can share, but trying to protect folks from their own experiences is not always the most beneficial thing because there’s sometimes the idea of us taking away their choice in their agency.”
  • “You can’t save everyone from their circumstances or their karma, like life be life. And sometimes, it’s this idea that folks have to go through what they’re going to go through. And that just is what it is.”
  • “Folks are so eager to step in the line of fire and then end up being the person getting burned. And I want to say that you may have the best of intentions in doing so. Right? You may have a heart of gold, you may have all the well-meaning. But it’s important to explore if you’re doing so from the perspective of overcompensating for something or because that person won’t or can’t.”
  • “Is it about them? Or is it about you and your desire to be needed by others?”
  • “Everybody doesn’t have the best of intentions when they’re asking you for something.”
  • “I think that you have to put your mask on first.”
  • “If you do if you overextend, who’s going to put you back together?”
  • “I’m not talking about children, I’m also not talking about those who can’t – physically, mentally, emotionally – cannot do for themselves. I’m not talking about those folks. I’m talking about those who are actually capable. And making sure that that distinction is clear to my hope in saying this is not to be harsh, but it is to call you in on this idea of trying to overcompensate for something you feel like you’re lacking.”
  • “So, you are going to show up, show out and be a savior to someone else. And my question is: If it’s not you, why can’t it be them? Why can’t we allow folks to figure out what it is that works or doesn’t work for them without being the person who’s “the soft place to land”?”

Music by: Noir Et Blanc Vie

Moments of AuthenticityEmail: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram | Facebook | Website | Youtube | Spotify | Apple

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Welcome back to another episode!

So, I recently had the pleasure of joining April and Jason from the BariNation Podcast for a meaningful conversation. We explored the transformative journey that follows bariatric surgery, discussing the personal changes and the impact on relationships. I shared my own experiences, emphasizing the importance of a strong support system and embracing your new identity.

Whether you’re considering surgery or navigating life post-op, this episode offers relatable stories, valuable insights, and a celebration of growth. If you want to know what it’s like to go through this transformation and how to come out stronger on the other side, give it a listen!

Timestamps

[00:02] Changing relationships after bariatric surgery.

[04:14] Weight loss surgery and personal growth.

[05:55] Body image, self-perception, and compliments.

[10:07] How weight loss surgery affects relationships.

[16:52] Weight loss, self-improvement, and relationships.

[21:05] Weight loss surgery and its impact on relationships.

[27:08] Validating intuition and addressing relationship concerns.

[32:14] Manipulation and control in personal relationships.

[38:55] Personal growth and communication.

[46:06] Communication and emotional impact of statements.

[47:41] Self-care and mental health after bariatric surgery.

Notable Quotes

“I’m taking the most opportunity of the second lease on life that I have. Because I know not to take it for granted now.”

“One of the biggest reasons, or one of the major reasons why big relationships change, is because the relationship to yourself changes. And so how you see yourself, how you move in the world, how you respond to things, they do start to change.”

“If my shift in loving myself and keeping myself alive is a problem for you, there’s a much deeper conversation we need to have, because you’re important to me, but I’m also important to me. And if I’m not important enough to you, to keep myself alive, aside from what I can do for you, then we’ve got some serious talking to do.”

“Your relationship to yourself can sometimes be shaken because of all the ways in which you’re engaging all of these spaces.”

“What is absolutely mind blowing to me… when I look at myself, I really don’t think I’ve changed that much. But how I presented myself in the world absolutely has changed. And while it doesn’t feel that way, from my vantage point, it absolutely has to look different from everybody else’s vantage point.”

“I think it’s also recognizing that certain people don’t mean you well. Even the ones that you love. They don’t mean you well because they also don’t want you to be competition.”

“Putting yourself first... it doesn’t mean that you’re putting anybody last; it means that you’re putting you first so you can make space for the ways in which you want to show up.”

“You are worthy of getting the support that you need. If it’s not coming from the people that you love, you can make space for their concerns, but don’t allow it to consume your decision to care for yourself.”

Music by: Noir Et Blanc Vie

BariNation Website: https://barination.com/

IG: instagram.com/bari.nation

Moments of AuthenticityEmail: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram | Facebook | Website | Youtube | Spotify | Apple

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Feeling overwhelmed by the never-ending demands of social media and trying to navigate your identity in today’s complex world? You’re not alone.

In this episode, we’re joined by Dr. Erika M. Dawkins from Widener University and Arkeria Robertson, LPC, who dive deep into the world of minority identity development, the effects of microaggressions, and how social media can really mess with our self-image and relationships. They’re here to offer up their best advice on dealing with stress, embracing self-care, and building stronger, healthier relationships.

What’s Covered:

  • Social media impact on business and personal growth.
  • Social media’s role in mental health professionals’ businesses.
  • Social media pressure and self-doubt.
  • Comparison and contribution in online spaces.
  • Balancing authenticity and pressure to conform in social media.
  • The impact of social media on mental health professionals.
  • Authenticity in social media and consumerism.
  • Societal expectations and personal growth.
  • Prioritizing tasks and setting realistic goals.
  • Siloed perspectives and personal experiences.
  • Self-care and grace in professional settings.
  • Self-awareness and personal growth.

Tune in to hear all about their invaluable insights and practical tips that could just be the game-changer you need!

About Dr. Erika M. Dawkins

Dr. Erika M. Dawkins is an Assistant Professor in the Institute for Graduate Clinical Psychology at Widener University and Clinical Director of Chester Community Coalition. Dr. Dawkins’ clinical and research interests include minority identity development, microaggressions, intersectionality, couples therapy, human sexuality, and, more recently, the impact that social media has on self-image and the development and maintenance of interpersonal relationships. In 2019, Dr. Dawkins opened her own counseling, consulting, and coaching firm, Revolutionary Perspectives, LLC.

Social Media: @dr.erikadawkins

About Arkeria Robertson, LPC

Arkeria Robertson is a Licensed Professional Counselor with an M.A. in Mental Health Counseling. She has worked in the mental health field for the past 8 years. She has worked in community mental, housing assistance, and school-based settings. Throughout her work, she has learned the importance of implementing self-care to help clients cope with stress and anxiety. She launched her private practice, Always Amazing Counseling & Consulting in 2018. She is the author of a self-care workbook, “The Simple Self-Care Solution.”

Social Media: @alwaysamazingcc

Timestamps

  • [00:04] Social media impact on business and personal growth.
  • [04:24] Social media’s role in mental health professionals’ businesses.
  • [05:59] Social media pressure and self-doubt.
  • [09:54] Comparison and contribution in online spaces.
  • [11:17] Balancing authenticity and pressure to conform in social media.
  • [13:23] The impact of social media on mental health professionals.
  • [20:30] Authenticity in social media and consumerism.
  • [22:42] Societal expectations and personal growth.
  • [28:30] Prioritizing tasks and setting realistic goals.
  • [37:25] Siloed perspectives and personal experiences.
  • [39:33] Self-care and grace in professional settings.
  • [44:03] Self-awareness and personal growth.

Music by: Noir Et Blanc Vie

Moments of AuthenticityEmail: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram | Facebook | Website | Youtube | Spotify | Apple

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Have you ever felt the weight of an entire year, its joys, sorrows, and the world’s chaos, all at once? That’s what we’re exploring in this episode, as I delve into the profound impact of 2023, finding hope amidst challenges, and the importance of self-care and authenticity.

In this episode, I’ll talk about:

  • The profound impact that 2023 has had on our lives – from personal growth to global events.
  • Exploring the delicate balance between holding hope and acknowledging the harsh realities of life.
  • Why it’s crucial to share your experiences and emotions, whether with a therapist, coach, or a trusted individual.
  • Various ways to recharge, from turning off your phone and connecting with nature to finding moments of solitude.
  • Aspirations for the coming year, emphasizing the importance of capacity and authenticity.

Listen to the full episode for a deeper dive into these reflections and to join me as I embrace the possibilities of the future. Wishing you a safe, happy New Year filled with authenticity and growth. See you next year!

Timestamps

  • [00:00] Personal growth and self-awareness in a challenging year.
  • [01:28] The challenges of modern life, feeling both hopeful and heavy-hearted.
  • [03:29] Personal growth and capacity for the new year. Having the capacity to show up authentically in all spaces.
  • [04:32] Emotional expression and support. The importance of seeking support for emotional well-being.
  • [06:12] Self-care and rest in a challenging world. The importance of rest and recharge in the new year.

Notable Quotes

  • “The access to technology and all the things that we’re witnessing at our fingertips on a daily, minute by minute basis, is both a blessing and also a challenge because we are inundated with so many things.”
  • “I just want to send my love and light to all that have really endured this year. And who are continuing to pursue push through on a daily basis. I see you, I feel you, I hear you.”
  • “Life be life and shit is hard, right? If I can be completely transparent and colloquial. Shit is hard.”
  • “You deserve support. I’m gonna emphasize you deserve support.”
  • “Sometimes it’s also just taking some time or a moment for yourself to be able to turn off.”
  • “I hope this year is filled with many revelations, beautiful moments, abundance and prosperity for you and yours.”

Music by: Noir Et Blanc Vie

Moments of AuthenticityEmail: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram | Facebook | Website | Youtube | Spotify | Apple

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Welcome back to Moments of Authenticity!

Fear has a remarkable power to hold us back, trapping us in narratives that no longer serve us. But here’s the twist: What if the very things we fear could also lead us to the most extraordinary moments of growth and self-discovery?

Join me on this transformative journey as we explore the concept of failure as a guide, the analogy of life as ascending a mountain, and the strategies to move through fear toward authentic self-expression.

In this episode, I’ll talk about:

  • Exploring the theme of fear and how it can hold us back.
  • Understanding that fear often keeps us stuck in outdated stories.
  • Embracing the idea that what we fear and what we desire are both possibilities.
  • Debunking the notion of failure and seeing it as a guide for growth.
  • Using fear as motivation to prove ourselves wrong.
  • The analogy of life as ascending a mountain and why setbacks are just base camps.
  • The importance of acknowledging and exploring your emotions, even fear.
  • Creating a plan to move through fear and utilize it for your benefit.

Ready to dive deeper into this transformative conversation? Tune in to the full episode and let’s embark on this journey together!

Timestamps

  • [00:00] Embracing risk and potential.
  • [01:23] Fear’s impact on decision-making and personal growth.
  • [03:14] Embracing failure as a learning opportunity.
  • [07:27] Acknowledging and moving past fear.
  • [09:53] Overcoming fear and pursuing dreams.

Notable Quotes

  • “‘What if I fall?’ And the response is: ‘But darling, what if you fly?’”
  • “Sometimes getting to the thing that you like; you love; you want, takes a little bit of discomfort.”
  • “It’s okay to visit fear, but not set up shop there.”
  • “Sometimes the fear that it won’t work out can be motivation to prove yourself wrong.”
  • “Failure is an illusion, it is information, and it provides a space to be able to figure out what do you need to do in order to make space for and create a plan that could benefit you in the long run.”
  • “Life is like ascending a mountain. Whenever there’s a point where you get stuck, that is base camp, you don’t go from where you are back all the way down the mountain, and then back up again.”

Music by: Noir Et Blanc Vie
Moments of AuthenticityEmail: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram | Facebook | Website | Youtube | Spotify | Apple

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Have you ever wished people could read your mind and understand your needs without you saying a word? We’ve all been there, but the reality is, no one knows what you need until you say it. In this episode of “Moments of Authenticity,” we dive into the power of communication in relationships. Let’s explore the profound message that could change how you navigate your interactions.

What’s Covered:

  • The Struggle of Advocating for Yourself
  • The Need for Vulnerability
  • The Decision-Making Power
  • Embracing Change
  • The Cost of Silence
  • The Need for Repetition
  • Embracing Human Responses
  • The Power of Choice and Standing Up for Your Values

If you want to unlock the full depth of this discussion and discover how to make your voice heard, listen to the full episode.

Timestamps

  • [00:23] The importance of expressing one’s needs; the importance of expressing one’s needs and feelings to avoid frustration and exhaustion.
  • [01:33] Self-advocacy and fear of rejection. The struggle of advocating for yourself due to fear of rejection or negative consequences.
  • [03:44] Communication, boundaries, and expectations in relationships. The importance of naming and honoring one’s needs, even if it feels uncomfortable or vulnerable.
  • [08:29] Personal agency and relationships. Learn to recognize and honor your own choices and boundaries in relationships.
  • [10:22] Setting boundaries and advocating for oneself. Learn the importance of stating needs and boundaries in relationships, as well as self-advocacy and acknowledging discomfort while emphasizing the importance of saying what you need.

Notable Quotes

  • “No one knows what you need until you say it.”
  • “Even in the midst of challenges, nothing changes if nothing changes.”
  • “You don’t want to necessarily be a burden. And you also don’t want to be burdened.”
  • “It is definitely uncomfortable to have to advocate for yourself all the time.”
  • “It’s okay for you to need time to figure out what that looks like.”
  • “I am challenging you to recognize, honor, and validate your choice and your engagement with certain folks.”
  • “Don’t forget that you have a choice.”

Music by: Noir Et Blanc Vie

Moments of AuthenticityEmail: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram | Facebook | Website | Youtube | Spotify | Apple

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Welcome back to Moments of Authenticity!

Have you ever thought about how you’ve changed over the years? As I celebrate my 35th birthday, join me on a journey of self-reflection and growth in this special episode of Moments of Authenticity.

In this episode, we explore:

  • Embracing life’s shifts and the power of slowing down.
  • Reflecting on our goals and how we’ve evolved.
  • The importance of self-care and avoiding the comparison trap.
  • Honoring the beauty of a slowdown.

Tune in to the full episode for insights on embracing change, prioritizing self-care, and navigating life’s unique journey.

Listen now, and let’s celebrate growth together!

Timestamps

  • [00:00] Self-care, rest, and personal growth. Reflecting on personal growth, self-care, and the importance of rest.
  • [01:22] Personal growth and self-awareness. Reflecting on personal growth and changes over the past year, feeling exhausted and in need of rest.
  • [04:15] Self-care and therapy. Reflecting on self-care and therapy, finding it difficult to balance life’s demands with personal growth.
  • [05:52] Self-care, energy management, and prioritization for mental health providers. Reflecting on the importance of self-awareness and avoiding comparison in mental health work.
  • [09:42] Self-care, mindfulness, and prioritizing personal well-being. Reflecting on past goals and dreams, and the need for self-care and mindfulness in therapy practice.

Notable Quotes

  • “You have to slow down and you have to rest.”
  • “I think it’s great how everybody is able to function. And I also cannot shame myself for not having that same energy.”
  • “35 is feeling like a slowdown.”
  • “Are you giving yourself the grace to also make whatever shift you need?”
  • “I have to really be cognizant of what I have done.”
  • “When my body says lay down, I lay down when my body says we want to watch Mama’s family, I will watch it.”
  • “I hope that you are giving yourself so much grace and home especially during this really busy chaotic season.”
  • “I hope that you’re honoring what your body and your soul and your mind is asking for versus trying to put it off for a time to have it because if you don’t make time for it, the body absolutely will.”

Music by: Noir Et Blanc Vie

Moments of AuthenticityEmail: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram | Facebook | Website | Youtube | Spotify | Apple

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Welcome back to Moments of Authenticity!

Here’s a thought-provoking question for you: Have you ever stopped to consider the language you use when you talk to yourself? I mean, we all have that inner voice, right? Well, I’ve got something special for you in today’s episode: What Language Do You Use with Yourself?

So, what language do you use with yourself? I’m diving into this fascinating topic because let’s face it, sometimes we’re way too hard on ourselves, often coming from places that don’t even belong to us.

In this episode, we’re going to explore:

  • The influence of early voices in shaping our self-talk
  • How self-talk impacts our behavior and interactions
  • The difference between “have to” and “want to” mindset
  • Overcoming the trap of all-or-nothing thinking
  • Showing up for yourself with patience and self-compassion
  • Embracing curiosity and making space for growth

Ready to dive into the fascinating world of self-talk? Tune in to this episode of Moments of Authenticity and let’s explore the language we use with ourselves. Listen now and embark on a journey of self-discovery and positive change!

Timestamps

  • [00:00] What language do you use with yourself?
  • [01:05] How language affects our behavior.
  • [03:25] “I don’t know” – people will say they don’t know, instead of giving themselves the time to slow down.
  • [05:59] Shifting your mindset and making a shift.
  • [07:34] Is it never going to happen or do you need more time?
  • [09:35] You always do or you never do.
  • [11:50] How long does it take to be patient?
  • [13:12] What do you need instead of criticism?

Notable Quotes

  • “We have a tendency to sometimes be a lot more critical than we need to be.”
  • “Being mindful of how language also impacts behavior, and being cognizant of how you move in the world based on the language that you speak to yourself, it impacts how we move in the world and impacts what we receive as a result.”
  • “Do you have to? Or do you want to? Because those are two different things.”
  • “Is it your failing? Or do you need to shift either your mindset or your behaviors or both?”
  • “All or nothing. Those are cognitive distortions, which means that they are things that you think in your head that are absolutely true, that may or may not be true.”
  • “The idea of you yelling at yourself telling yourself something negative that can sometimes feel like a booster. But how long does that actually last for you?”
  • “I think sometimes we don’t always see how badly we speak to ourselves, and how gently and kindly we speak to someone else.”
  • “Exhibit some curiosity, slowing yourself down to ask what’s underneath that thought.”
  • “What kind of encouragement do you need? What do you need to unpack?”
  • “What might have been good for you in one season may not be good for you in the next. So being cognizant of how you’ve moved so far, and how you would like to continue to move, exhibit some curiosity around that and make space for what could be true now.”

Music by: Noir Et Blanc Vie

Moments of Authenticity

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram | Facebook | Website | Youtube | Spotify | Apple

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Welcome back to Moments of Authenticity!

In this episode, I open up about my experiences as a mental health professional and the challenges I’ve faced while trying to balance personal growth and business aspirations. I also reflect on the initial excitement of starting my own practice and the valuable insights gained from working with a business coach. I’ll talk about self-care, seeking support, and making choices that truly nurture our well-being.

So, join me on this journey of self-discovery and growth. Listen to the full episode of “Just Stand”, it’s a conversation that invites you to reflect on your own journey and find inspiration in embracing your authentic self.

Timestamps

  • [00:51] The need to keep up with what everyone else is doing.
  • [03:03] The business coach got me started in thinking bigger and abundance.
  • [04:58] I want to be on other people’s podcasts.
  • [07:07] Taking a step back from planning and looking for abundance.
  • [08:53] How to get lost in the sauce of wanting to gain abundance.
  • [10:45] Do you need not to plan right now?
  • [13:11] Take a step back and assess where you’re at.
  • [15:49] Be present with yourself vs. needing to show up.
  • [18:17] Being aware of how you are showing up in your life.

Notable Quotes

  • “When you’ve done all you can, you just stand.”
  • “In the ways that I’m trying to gain abundance, I’m also losing some of the things I’m trying to fight for time, capacity, and energy.”
  • “I needed to put the map down and just be okay with where I’m at right now.”
  • “Sometimes you just need a break.”
  • “Sometimes there is a shift and pivot needed around what I want to do versus what others are telling me to do.”
  • “You are a vessel, so you must be tended to as well.”
  • “Sometimes you need to take a step back, reevaluate, and assess where you’re at.”
  • “What does it mean to be just you?”
  • “Resting and taking care of myself is important.”
  • “When my hands are too full, I no longer have room for the things that I do love.”
  • “Taking a little bit of time to just stand, to be still, to just be is important.”

Music by: Noir Et Blanc Vie

Moments of Authenticity

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram | Facebook | Website | Youtube | Spotify | Apple

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Hey there, it’s Amber Boyd, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, and I’m excited to be back with another episode of Moments of Authenticity.

Today, I’m excited to dive into the topic of consistency over overcompensation.

Like many of you, I’ve experienced burnout from overcompensating for a task. This is especially true when it comes to health and fitness goals. I used to think that doing something in excess was the only way to achieve my goals, but I learned that it’s the little things we do consistently that make our progress sustainable.

Consistency doesn’t mean doing the same thing every day and expecting the same results. Instead, it means making space for doing a little bit of something consistently and having the energy, capacity, and grace to show up that way.

I encourage you to avoid overcompensating and focus on doing things little by little consistently. This approach will help you achieve your goals sustainably rather than overwhelming yourself and risking burnout.

Of course, staying consistent can be a challenge, especially when life throws us curveballs. That’s why it’s essential to be flexible and make space for what can’t be done on a given day or week.

Remember, it’s not about being perfect or rigid in our approach. It’s about finding ways to be consistent that work for us. Whether it’s working out, drinking enough water, or eating enough protein, let’s focus on doing things consistently, little by little. It may not be easy, but it’s worth it!

So, if you’re looking for some practical tips and insights on achieving your goals sustainably, be sure to tune in to this episode of Moments of Authenticity.

Timestamps:

  • [00:02] Overcompensating leads to burnout and burnout.
  • [02:36] The difference between doing the task and making it sustainable.
  • [04:38] Staying consistent with goals can be challenging.
  • [06:28] It’s important to provide yourself with grace and give yourself the permission to do something different.
  • [08:19] Overcompensating can lead to burnout.
  • [09:51] Meal prep doesn’t have to be complicated.
  • [11:30] The importance of being consistent with your goals.
  • [13: 15] Don’t shoot all over yourself. Take small steps.

Notable Quotes:

  • “Consistency over overcompensation.”
  • “It’s easy to think that doing something in abundance will help us reach our goals faster, but it’s actually the little things that we do consistently that make our progress sustainable.”
  • “Consistency doesn’t necessarily mean doing the same thing every day and expecting the same results.”
  • “It’s important to provide yourself with grace and give yourself the permission to do something different.”
  • “Doing things little by little makes it sustainable.”
  • “Overcompensating can lead to burnout.”
  • “Let’s focus on doing things consistently little by little and avoid overcompensating, which can lead to burnout and giving up altogether.”

Music by: Noir Et Blanc Vie

Moments of Authenticity

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram | Facebook | Website | Youtube | Spotify | Apple

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Hey there, it’s Amber Boyd, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, and I’m excited to be back with another episode of Moments of Authenticity.

Today, I want to talk about something that’s been on my mind a lot lately: mental health. In this episode, I talk about my journey into the mental health field and how it’s been shaped by my own experiences with mental health and my mentor, Mrs. Mary Augustine. She was the one who encouraged me to think bigger and go into the field of marriage and family therapy.

I am passionate about dispelling the myth that mental health is unimportant, particularly in communities of color. As a person of color myself, I strive to create spaces where people can talk openly about their experiences and know that they are not alone. It’s important to me to co-create space with my clients so they can express themselves and get the support they need.

During this episode, I also touch on the different layers of well-being that are encompassed in mental health, including generational trauma, capitalism, racism, homophobia, and other forms of phobia that affect different communities. I believe that it’s essential to acknowledge and address these issues in order to provide comprehensive mental health support.

I hope that this episode inspires you to take care of your mental health and reach out for support when you need it. Remember, mental health is something that we all have, and it’s important to prioritize it just as much as we prioritize our physical health. Thank you for tuning in, and I look forward to speaking with you in the next episode of Moments of Authenticity.

Timestamps:

  • [01:10] The reason I got into this work.
  • [03:21] Why mental health is so important for communities of color.
  • [06:01] How mental health affects how we think, feel, act and relate to others.
  • [08:27] When your social foundation is shaken, it can really impact your mental health.
  • [10:41] How do we make space for what’s happened?
  • [15:23] You are human with really big feelings. You deserve to have a space to experience them outside of your body.

Notable Quotes:

  • “Mental health is impacted by, and impacts, the other aspects of well-being.”
  • “Mental health incorporates different layers of well-being, so I think sometimes we think it’s just one thing, but it’s actually multiple things.”
  • “If I can be half of the person that she [my high school counselor] was to me to someone else, then I feel like I’m doing what I’m supposed to be doing in life.”
  • “My hope is always to make space for folks to be able to express their experience and let them know that they are not alone in that going through things in isolation is incredibly harmful.”
  • “You are human with really big feelings, ideas, and experiences and you deserve to have a space to experience them outside of your body. Do something that supports your mental health, writing, singing, talking, meditation, yoga, etc. You deserve it, you deserve it, you deserve it.”

Music by: Noir Et Blanc Vie

Moments of Authenticity
Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram | Facebook | Website

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Hey there, it’s Amber Boyd, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, and I’m back with another episode of Moments of Authenticity.

In this episode, I explore the question, “Have you done all you can?” which is a topic that often comes up in my therapy sessions. While it’s easy to think that we’ve exhausted all options when faced with a dilemma, the truth is that there may be more we can do outside of our comfort zone. I talk about the cognitive distortions that can lead us to believe that we’ve done all we can, and how important it is to recognize half-truths and explore uncomfortable options.

I also discuss the idea of giving ourselves grace, acknowledging our fears, and recognizing the tools and support we already have at our disposal. Change can be uncomfortable, but it’s often necessary for growth and healing.

So, if you’re feeling stuck in a situation and wondering if you’ve done all you can, this episode is for you. Join me as I delve into this topic and provide insights and tips on navigating dilemmas healthily and authentically.

Timestamps

  • [00:47] Have we really done all that we can?
  • [02:38] What do you do when you’re uncomfortable?
  • [04:20] How do we thrive outside of our comfort zone?
  • [06:30] What shifts need to take place if you’re going to have this conversation?
  • [08:25] Making space for change is the only consistent thing.
  • [10:04] Giving yourself grace to name your fears.
  • [12:18] Have you done all that you can within the scope of your comfort?

Notable Quotes

  • “Change does happen outside of your comfort zone.”
  • “Resolving a dilemma doesn’t always fit within a scope of black or white or all or nothing. Sometimes it is compromise.”
  • “I think sometimes there’s a full truth, your truth, and there may be another truth that also exists in the same realm.”
  • “You deserve to be in a space where you don’t have to hold difficult uncomfortable things within your body, but expel them, and do so in a way that feels healthy.”
  • “You are an incredibly talented, incredibly intelligent person who actually has a lot more tools than you give yourself credit for.”
  • “The goal is to get to healing through authenticity. So what is really happening for you, and let’s not sugarcoat it.”
  • “Give yourself grace about your fears, you don’t have to be perfect at any of this, you are human.”
  • “There’s redemption in owning what has happened or taking place, and being able to move through it in a way that feels healthy for you.”
  • “It’s okay to need things. It’s okay to need people, it’s okay to need a different perspective.”
  • “Have you done all you can? Sometimes the answer is I’ve done all that I can within the scope of my comfort.”

Music by: Noir Et Blanc Vie

Moments of Authenticity
Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram | Facebook | Website

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Episode Summary

Welcome back to another episode!

In this episode, this topic came up in one of my therapy sessions with a client whom I got permission from to talk about this.

We discussed how my client would leave spaces when she has a particular emotion. She would do this to punish herself for any mistakes she makes or to convince herself that she has not atoned for her mistake/experience. As a result, she experiences a spiral of negative self-talk.

Timestamps

  • [00:04] Punishing yourself with isolation
  • [01:18] Figuring out your narrative alone
  • [05:21] Understanding the impact of your emotions
  • [07:04] How to identify your feelings
  • [08:36] Validating your emotions and trusting your intuition
  • [10:13] Why do you punish yourself in isolation
  • [11:40] You’re responsible for your feelings

Notable Quotes

  • “I think that when you are dysregulated, having a person tell you that you need to go off and figure it out by yourself.”
  • “Your feelings are valid, and your intuition is likely correct.”
  • “I think it's also important to seek out support from an addictive party.”
  • “Think about how unhealthy that felt, or having to manage other people's emotions that may have been more complex.”
  • “So being one in your body, what am I feeling? Where am I feeling?”

Music by: Noir Et Blanc Vie

Moments of Authenticity

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram | Facebook | Website

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Episode Summary

Welcome back to another episode!

As for this month's episode, we will discuss being concerned and not consumed. Running into a circumstance where buildings without the right equipment may appear uneasy. By using that metaphor, we can include the times when we encounter challenges. This may be personal or social.

Today, we will highlight the importance of discussing the challenge of not caring about what's going on with your loved ones and others.

Timestamps

  • [00:04] How to be concerned and not consumed
  • [02:07] How do we care about people who are struggling?
  • [04:15] Managing our response to difficult situations
  • [05:57] Being selfless in a challenging situation
  • [08:08] You can express concern and experience the outcome.
  • [10:05] Analyzing internal discussion of cognitive errors.
  • [11:37] Be aware of how your choices are affecting others.

Notable Quotes

  • “The desire to be selfless, instead of cognizant, can throw off the ability to actually make space for what that person is going through.”
  • “We have to also be mindful about how we step in for folx, because folks may not need that kind of support. ”
  • “Taking over that person's grieving process can take away from them actually having space to authentically fall apart.”
  • “ And while you're focusing on other people's things, your challenges and issues and problems may not be addressed.”
  • “So if you are not aware of how you feel, and why you feel that way, then sometimes that can become a burden on the person that you're supposedly trying to help. ”

Music by: Noir Et Blanc Vie

Moments of Authenticity

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram | Facebook | Website

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Episode Summary

Welcome to our very FIRST 2023 episode for Season 3!

If you're listening to this episode of my podcast Moments of Authenticity, then allow me to re-introduce myself.

I'm a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) by the name of Amber Boyd. I am a bariatric patient, an author, and a podcaster. My goal in creating this channel is an effort to grow my community, namely the bariatric community. I want to approach this from various health-related perspectives, including mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual well-being. I am excited to announce that I am starting a Youtube channel and this is my way of introducing that!

Timestamps

  • [00:05] Episode introduction
  • [01:08] What is your intention for the year?
  • [03:44] What is your word for the year?

Notable Quotes

  • “So I think it's important to recognize that I'm not the end all be all to anything in particular.”
  • “I think it's important to not only provide information but to also learn from the community that I am a part of.”
  • “I'm providing from a perspective of both mental health and within the bariatric community.”
  • “Think about how unhealthy that felt, or having to manage other people's emotions that may have been more complex.”
  • “I feel like resolutions and expectations, they tend to have such a strict idea of what it's supposed to be.”

Music by: Noir Et Blanc Vie

Moments of Authenticity

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram | Facebook | Website

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Episode Summary

Welcome back to another episode!

Today, I’m sharing part three of a three-part interview I did with Zipporah Herbert on her podcast, Bariatric Confessions. Zipporah Herbert is a Bariatric community builder and supporter. She shares her journey in hopes to inspire and motivate the community. After getting the gastric sleeve, she created a community for people who did not have support from their inner circle. Zipporah took her background in digital marketing and focused on being a bridge to connect the barbaric world. She's hosted exercise challenges, meetups, and her daily podcast called Bariatric Confessions.

In this final episode, we talk about building the mental power to stay on track, dealing with post-surgery emotions, the importance of staying true to yourself, and transfer addiction.

Timestamps

  • [01:09] What’s a good way to build mental power when you want to revert back to old eating habits?
  • [03:46] How can someone balance their emotions after surgery?
  • [12:44] How do you manage moodiness and feeling unbalanced?
  • [15:12] Learn your true self.
  • [19:40] Transfer addiction: is it real?
  • [24:33] Work with me!

Notable Quotes

  • “If you don’t name the emotion, it will keep coming back.”
  • “There’s a lot of things that transpire that feel normal to us but we don’t know why we do them. They just become innate.”
  • “The loss of being able to explore can create a cognitive dissonance as well.”

Interested in learning more about Zipporah Herbert:

Podcast: Bariatric Confessions (Apple & Spotify)

TikTok @bariatricjawn

Instagram @bariatricjawn

Join Her Facebook Group

More about Amber Boyd, LMFT

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram | Facebook | Website

Find the Preparing for Your Bariatric Journey workbook here

Music by: Noir Et Blanc Vie

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Episode Summary

Welcome back to another episode!

Today, I’m sharing part two of a three-part interview I did with Zipporah Herbert on her podcast, Bariatric Confessions. Zipporah Herbert is a Bariatric community builder and supporter. She shares her journey in hopes to inspire and motivate the community. After getting the gastric sleeve, she created a community for people who did not have support from their inner circle. Zipporah took her background in digital marketing and focused on being a bridge to connect the barbaric world. She's hosted exercise challenges, meetups, and her daily podcast called Bariatric Confessions.

In this second episode, we talk about obesity as a mindset and personality trait, letting go of the person you used to be, using food to feel “good enough”, why we need to encourage these conversations, and building consistency.

Timestamps

  • [00:50] Obesity as a mindset.
  • [06:37] Letting go of your previous self.
  • [10:08] We are worthy.
  • [16:43] Why this is an important conversation.
  • [18:35] Being consistent.
  • [23:32] What consistency looks like for me.
  • [26:06] Be gentle with yourself.

Notable Quotes

  • “You have the memories, and they’re good ones, but that person is gone, and you’re relearning yourself.”
  • “You have to let people get to know who you are now, not who you were.”
  • “Thinking too far in the past creates depression. Thinking too far in the future causes anxiety. It’s important to be in the present.”
  • “We are so worthy of being protected, being supported, being okay.”
  • “Be gentle with yourself.”

Interested in learning more about Zipporah Herbert:

Podcast: Bariatric Confessions (Apple & Spotify)

TikTok @bariatricjawn

Instagram @bariatricjawn

Join my Facebook Group

More about Amber Boyd, LMFT

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram | Facebook | Website

Find the Preparing for Your Bariatric Journey workbook here

Music by: Noir Et Blanc Vie

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I had an opportunity to record an information session that I completed on 10/31/2022 to provide context for the program that I am offering to pre-operation (and recently post-operation) bariatric patients entitled: Preparing For Your Bariatric Journey 1:1 Experience!

In this episode, I will cover:

  1. Information about myself and my therapy practice and my bariatric progress
  2. SHIFT Framework/Curriculum
  3. FAQs
  4. Questions I've received folx within the bariatric community
  5. What you receive from joining the program
  6. A wrap-up!

If you want to know more or know someone who might feel free to pass this information along, I would love to discuss how I can support you all along your bariatric journey!

Learn more about the Preparing For Your Bariatric Journey 1:1 Experience here

Moments of Authenticity

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram | Facebook | Website

Find the Preparing for Your Bariatric Journey workbook here

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Episode Summary

Welcome back to another episode!

Today, I’m sharing part one of a three-part interview I did with Zipporah Herbert on her podcast, Bariatric Confessions. Zipporah Herbert is a Bariatric community builder and supporter. She shares her journey in hopes to inspire and motivate the community. After getting the gastric sleeve, she created a community for people who did not have support from their inner circle. Zipporah took her background in digital marketing and focused on being a bridge to connect the barbaric world. She's hosted exercise challenges, meetups, and her daily podcast called Bariatric Confessions.

In this first episode, we talk about my bariatric surgery, taking my experience as a patient and a therapist to help others, the truth about overconsumption, figuring out your ‘why’, feeling comfortable in your loose skin, and challenging the societal standard of beauty.

Timestamps

  • [03:00] My bariatric surgery.
  • [03:50] Helping other bariatric people.
  • [07:23] A lifelong journey with overconsumption.
  • [11:16] What to do if you regret the surgery.
  • [18:50] Let’s talk about loose skin.
  • [23:38] Challenging the societal standard of beauty.
  • [27:49] The importance of therapy.

Notable Quotes

  • “A lot of what we do and how we’ve experienced food, if you’ve been shamed, you do it in silence.”
  • “You don’t even realize how much you’re being conditioned to overeat and over-consume.”
  • “You can’t control everything. You have to understand that and breathe.”
  • “For me, loose skin is a representative of where I come from.”
  • “If who you’ve been hasn’t ever felt good enough, the surgery does not fix that.”

Interested in learning more about Zipporah Herbert:

Podcast: Bariatric Confessions (Apple & Spotify)

TikTok @bariatricjawn

Instagram @bariatricjawn

Join my Facebook Group

More about Amber Boyd, LMFT

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram | Facebook | Website

Find the Preparing for Your Bariatric Journey workbook here

Music by: Noir Et Blanc Vie

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Summary: In part IV of Moments of Authenticity, I dive into my diabetes diagnosis and the feelings that arose with it. I entered into a state of depression coupled with disappointment after my diagnosis, which only intensified after learning about the 20k price tag for bariatric surgery. Through research and support groups, I gathered the knowledge and confidence to pursue what was in my best interest – my health.

Quote: “I’ve seen how it’s impacted everybody’s lives that have been dealing with diabetes and I told myself ‘I want to break the cycle’”

Timestamps:

[00:27] My Bariatric Journey: Part IV

[02:17] Feelings of discouragement

[03:08] Surgery centers in Mexico

[04:21] Diagnosed with diabetes

[07:28] Choosing a bariatric center

[10:01] Fearful of surgery

[12:40] Changes in diet

[15:34] Interact through social media

[16:25] Outro

Learn more about the Bariatric Support Group here

Find the Preparing for Your Bariatric Journey workbook here

Music by: Noir Et Blanc Vie

Moments of Authenticity

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram | Facebook | Website

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Summary: In this episode of Moments of Authenticity, I get into part III of My Bariatric Journey. Moving back to California meant starting a real job in my field for the first time. Although my mind was ready to make changes to my body, my unpredictable schedule made planning meals ahead of time difficult to manage. After transitioning into working full time, I made the jump into private practice and moved to Houston. Here was where the doctor suggested bariatric surgery - with that news came a bruised ego and feelings of discouragement.

Quote: “I was able to start naming behaviors and honoring my experiences that contributed to what was going on and it supported my thinking around the biopsychosocial model”

Timestamps:

[00:00] My Bariatric Journey: Part III

[02:02] Transition from student to working full time

[03:23] Working for a community mental health program

[05:02] Becoming neglectful of my body

[08:38] Going to private practice

[10:40] Proposing bariatric surgery

[13:27] Gastric bypass vs gastric sleeve

[14:30] Outro

Learn more about the Bariatric Support Group here

Find the Preparing for Your Bariatric Journey workbook here

Music by: Noir Et Blanc Vie

Moments of Authenticity

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram | Facebook | Website

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Summary: In part II of My Bariatric Journey, I want to take a step back go through pivotal moments that led to my decision to go through with the surgery. During my time at Syracuse University, I managed to lose 50lbs with the support of friends, dietary restrictions, and discipline. However, moving back to California meant falling back into old habits, which would end up being the detriment to my weight loss journey.

Quote: “It’s not always about the intent, it’s the impact”

Timestamps:

[00:00] My Bariatric Journey: Part II

[01:42] Feeling conflicted in the body

[04:00] Overindulging

[05:49] Adverse reaction to Bariatric suggestions

[07:20] Syracuse University

[10:01] Communal with food

[12:03] Entering my fitness journey

[14:00] Moving back to California

[15:02] Falling back into old habits

[17:18] Outro

Learn more about the Bariatric Support Group here

Find the Preparing for Your Bariatric Journey workbook here

Music by: Noir Et Blanc Vie

Moments of Authenticity

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram | Facebook | Website

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Summary: In this episode of Moments of Authenticity, I invite you on my bariatric journey. Eating has always been a contributing factor to how I dealt with emotions, celebrated, grieved, and communed with others. Growing up, my weight was regularly a topic of conversation in one way or another, and although there was no malicious intent, the feeling of shame and guilt consumed me. After years of fad diets and semi-successful weight loss attempts, I finally arrived at bariatric surgery – this is part one of four of that journey.

Quote: “Food became a coping mechanism to [combat] some of the really big feelings that I was having.”

Timestamps:

[00:00] My Bariatric Journey: Part I

[02:11] My experience with weight

[04:35] Trouble addressing emotions

[07:02] Covering up to hide my size

[09:00] Following fad diets

[12:50] Preyed on as a minor

[14:45] Pushing yourself to eat more

[16:39] Introducing bariatric surgery as a possibility

[17:25] Outro

Learn more about the Bariatric Support Group here

Find the Preparing for Your Bariatric Journey workbook here

Music by: Noir Et Blanc Vie

Moments of Authenticity

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram | Facebook | Website

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Summary: Welcome back to Moments of Authenticity, and thank you for joining me as we transition into the New Year. 2020 was a year of uncertainty and growth which allowed 2021 to be a year of intentions and accomplishments. In this episode, I reflect on all the achievements I have met and exceeded, but most importantly, I contemplate on goals that remain unfinished. I take this time to understand where I fell short and use that energy to set intentions for the New Year with grace and love.

Quote: “Be accountable to what’s going on, but also [ask yourself] how do give yourself grace the same way you might give grace to a person outside of yourself?”

Timestamps:

[00:55] Transitioning into The New Year

[02:00] 2020: A year of uncertainty

[03:04] Accomplishments in 2021

[06:18] Starting a bariatric support group

[08:01] Workbook: Preparing for your bariatric journey

[08:51] Processing accomplishments of 2021

[10:33] Reflecting on unfinished goals

[12:11] Setting intentions for the new year

[14:13] Using time and energy to engage

[15:06] How do you provide yourself with grace?

[16:53] Outro

Learn more about the Bariatric Support Group here

Find the “Preparing for Your Bariatric Journey” workbook here

Music by: Patrick Patrikikos

Moments of Authenticity

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram | Facebook | Website

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SUMMARY:

On this episode of Moments of Authenticity, I speak on the significance of stepping out of your comfort zone. Neale Donald Walsch once said, “life begins at the end of your comfort zone” and this especially rings true for people who find may find solace in routine. Although there is nothing wrong with structure and routine, we’ll never know what lies on the other side if we’re not willing to break the monotony of life every once in a while. The objective here is to make space to add variety because change is inevitable.

TIMESTAMPS:

[00:49] Stepping out of your comfort zone

[01:23] “Life Begins at the End of your Comfort Zone” – Neale Donald Walsch

[03:47] Staying in the know makes things easier to predict

[05:00] Change is the most common and consistent thing

[05:41] What does it look like to step outside

[07:18] Make space to add more variety

[08:31] Doing anything new takes time and practice

Music by: Patrick Patrikikos

Moments of Authenticity

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram  | Facebook

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Summary:

Welcome back to Moments of Authenticity. We’ve made it a whole year, and I would like to thank each and every one of you for lending me your time and ears. For this episode, I’d like to recap on a few of my most popular episodes and give you the opportunity to give some suggestions on what you wish there to be covered for our second year of the podcast.

Timestamps:

[00:42] 1 year anniversary

[01:41] Appreciation

[02:47] Love from across the world

[05:08] Pivoting

[06:68] Emotional addiction and trauma bonding episode

[07:44] Externalizing your inner saboteur

[09:03] Doing too much

[09:38] Second anniversary of the practice

[10:26] What’s next?

Music by: Patrick Patrikikos

Moments of Authenticity

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram  | Facebook | Website

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Summary:

In this installment of Moments of Authenticity, I share with you the notion of planting your seeds and watching them harvest. Planting a seed doesn’t have to mean you’re setting a goal but rather an intention. Ask yourself if you are meeting the desires of your heart, and if not, I invite you to dig deeper and discover what needs to be let go in order to shift your focus.

Timestamps:

[00:51] Planting seeds and watching the harvest grow

[02:34] Review the intentions you set out

[04:38] Figuring out what makes your heart smile

[05:52] Figuring out a routine

[07:22] Changing the focus

[09:07] What do you need to let go of?

[11:24] Increase tools to limit stressors

[12:00] Why is this deserved?

*"Preparing for Bariatric Surgery" group will be available October 2nd and if you are interested or knows someone who might be, please feel free to email me and we can discuss the logistics! Thank you in advance!*

Music by: Patrick Patrikikos

Moments of Authenticity

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram  | Facebook | Website

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Summary:

In this episode of Moments of Authenticity, I celebrate the two-year anniversary of my practice, Healing Through Authenticity. I reveal the fear of success that almost kept me from pursuing this journey; I discuss how I overcame my inner saboteur and why I didn’t allow other people’s insecurities to internalize.

Timestamps:

[00:36] 2-year anniversary of Healing Through Authenticity

[02:12] Business coaching through the Dope Therapist Academy

[03:30] Mindset shift of becoming a business owner

[06:06] Things I wish I knew

[07:10] Don’t limit yourself

[09:12] Fear can be a motivator

[10:41] Don’t repel opportunities

[12:01] Pushing aside your inner saboteur

[14:07] Scarcity mindset

[15:14] What’s next to come

[16:43] Getting more training

[18:23] Creating apparel

"Preparing for Bariatric Surgery" group will be available October 2nd and if you are interested or knows someone who might be, please feel free to email me and we can discuss the logistics! Thank you in advance!*

Music by: Patrick Patrikikos

Moments of Authenticity

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram | Facebook | Website

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SUMMARY:

Today on Moments of Authenticity, I dive into the phrase DTM, doing too much. Having a tendency of taking on too much can be a direct result of your worth being dependent on productivity. Working hard because of a scarcity mindset can be detrimental to your growth and in this episode, I will show how to break these tendencies so you can embrace the life experiences that come your way.

TIMESTAMPS:

[00:41] DTM – Doing Too Much

[01:51] Having a tendency of taking on too much

[04:29] Your worth being attached to productivity

[05:20] Working extra hard to not be in the scarcity mindset

[06:00] The tendency to compare ourselves to others

[07:38] Take in the experiences

Music by: Patrick Patrikikos

Moments of Authenticity

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram  | Facebook

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SUMMARY:

Today on Moments of Authenticity I share with you a question that was asked to me that has now become my favorite to answer; where does your heart call to? There was a point in time where I was in a place I had so desperately prayed for and once it became reality, I couldn’t help but feel incomplete. As if what I thought I wanted was never truly my own purpose. On this episode I guide you through how to find solace and clarity by asking yourselves questions that breed honesty and reflection.

TIMESTAMPS:

[00:37] Where does your heart call to?

[02:11] Favorite questions to be asked

[03:01] Finding solace and clarity

[05:48] Choosing things out of a sense of obligations

[06:51] What are the basis of your decisions

[09:17] Tapping into your own tools

[11:23] Look within and externally for additional support

RELATED SOURCES*:

  • Therapy for Black Girls

  • Black Female Therapists

  • Melanin and Mental Health

  • National Queer and Trans Therapists of Color

  • Inclusive Therapists

  • Therapists of Color

  • Latinx Therapy

  • Therapy in Color

  • Therapy for Black Men

  • Therapy For QPOC

*You can find a more extensive list of resources on my social media page @HealingThroughAuthenticity

Music by: Patrick Patrikikos

Moments of Authenticity

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram | Facebook


This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

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SUMMARY:

Today on Moments of Authenticity I share with you an issue I have dealt with myself, which is getting in my own way. The habit of being your own barrier is a common occurrence and the only way to overcome it is by taking a step back to analyze and take action. On this episode, I will guide you through the steps you can take to separate other people’s suggestions from your own goals and create a roadmap that best suits your pace and comfort.

TIMESTAMPS:

[00:37] Getting out of your (my) own way

[01:37] The habit of being your own barrier

[03:21] Other folks making suggestions on your life

[05:38] Taking a step back to analyze

[07:12] Fear of disappointing yourself or others

[07:25] What would it take to feel comfortable

[07:54] Taking action!

Music by: Patrick Patrikikos

Moments of Authenticity

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram  | Facebook


This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

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SUMMARY:

Today on Moments of Authenticity, I speak on externalizing your inner saboteur. So often we find ourselves being our own worst enemy and as a result, we give our inner negative voice agency over our inner positive voice. On this episode, my goal is to help you acknowledge the negative voice within without allowing it to take over all while bringing to the forefront your positive thoughts.

TIMESTAMPS:

[00:41] Externalizing the inner saboteur

[01:33] Acknowledging the negative voice within

[04:24] What is it saying and what is it doing for you

[06:21] Externalizing the voice

[08:28] Allowing your personal internal thoughts to take hold

[11:37] Be the change

Music by: Patrick Patrikikos

Moments of Authenticity

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram  | Facebook


This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

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SUMMARY:

Today on Moments of Authenticity I expand more on the topic of trauma bonding, which I had mentioned in the previous episode. Trauma bonding is when we normalize the behaviors of someone who is causing harm. These bonds can be formed with the intention of a secure connection but if we seek relationships as a necessity in order to fulfill emotional needs, then this can create a breeding ground for abusers. For this episode, my goal is to help you recognize unhealthy attachments and pay attention to relationship patterns so you can once and for all break the cycle of abuse and make space for yourself.

TIMESTAMPS:

[00:48] What is trauma bonding

[01:47] “Connecting” with people through trauma

[03:03] Unhealthy attachments

[04:11] Fulfilling emotional needs

[07:28] Safeguards to put in place

[09:31] Making space for yourself

Music by: Patrick Patrikikos

Moments of Authenticity

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram  | Facebook

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Today we discuss the topic of EMOTIONAL ADDICTION:

I discuss:

  1. The predisposition of addiction
  2. Types of love
  3. Releasing self from cycles
  4. The manifestation of the things that you would LIKE to see

Thank you for tuning in and I look forward to our ongoing conversations!

-Amber

Music by: Patrick Patrikikos

Moments of Authenticity

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram: @HealingThroughAuthenticty | Facebook: facebook.com/HealingThroughAuthenticity


This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

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Today we discuss the topic of IDENTIFYING YOURSELF FOR YOURSELF:

I discuss:

  1. What exactly does identifying yourself FOR yourself mean?
  2. How and why it’s a challenging concept
  3. How to create and increase self-advocacy to NAME yourself

Thank you for tuning in and I look forward to our ongoing conversations!

-Amber

Music by: Patrick Patrikikos

Moments of Authenticity

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram: @HealingThroughAuthenticty | Facebook: facebook.com/HealingThroughAuthenticity

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Today we discuss the topic of THE HUSTLE OF (IM)PERFECTION:

I discuss:

  1. Perfectionism is a HUSTLE!
  2. Other folx get to benefit from said hustle
  3. How to manage perfectionism: DONE IS BETTER THAN PERFECT!

Thank you for tuning in and I look forward to our ongoing conversations!

-Amber

Music by: Patrick Patrikikos

Moments of Authenticity

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram: @HealingThroughAuthenticty | Facebook: facebook.com/HealingThroughAuthenticity

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Today we discuss the topic of PIVOTING:

I discuss:

  1. The reference that I got pivoting from: basketball!
  2. Discussing the difficulty with change
  3. Adjusting to said change

Thank you for tuning in and I look forward to our ongoing conversations!

-Amber

Music by: Patrick Patrikikos

Moments of Authenticity

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram: @HealingThroughAuthenticty | Facebook: facebook.com/HealingThroughAuthenticity


This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

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Today we discuss the topic of MANIFESTATION: setting your mind, intentions, and positive affirmation on something that you want to see come to fruition.

I discuss:

  1. Virgo Szn (my personal favorite time to set goals/manifestations)
  2. Taking time to think out what you want to see
  3. Power of visualizing and shifting
  4. Believing in yourself

Thank you for tuning in and I look forward to our ongoing conversations!

-Amber

Music by: Patrick Patrikikos

Moments of Authenticity

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram: @HealingThroughAuthenticty | Facebook: facebook.com/HealingThroughAuthenticity


This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

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Today, I introduce my podcast, MOMENTS OF AUTHENTICITY to the world!

The hope is to reach a wider audience with the conversations that I have with my clients, colleagues, and friends, on topics that we are exploring for ourselves and with each other! Your presence and thoughts are appreciated, as we continue to explore the impacts of living our lives in the most authentic way possible.

Thank you for tuning in and I look forward to our ongoing conversations!

-Amber

Music by: Patrick Patrikikos

Moments of Authenticity

Email: amber@amberboydtherapy.com | Instagram: @HealingThroughAuthenticty | Facebook: facebook.com/HealingThroughAuthenticity


This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app