Take a Seat: Recent Episodes

The Shipley School

Take a Seat is a podcast about flourishing. It’s about the art of thriving, the science and practice of well-being, and people who are “crushing it.” Flourishing expert Dr. Nick Holton explores topics ranging from self-actualization, friendships, and transcendence, to optimal functioning, magnifying collective potential, and creating a better humanity. Guests include experts on the cutting edge of what it takes to help individuals and communities thrive. The podcast is produced by The Shipley School, a PreK-Grade 12 day school rethinking education and what we need to build a better world.

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In this episode of Take a Seat, host and flourishing expert Dr. Nick Holton talks to Michael G. Turner, Head of The Shipley School (a PreK through Grade 12 private school in the western Philadelphia suburbs) about the history and future of independent school education, exploring how private schools can transform to better achieve flourishing and new conceptualizations of excellence. They discuss how private schools can become more equitable, the transition to an inquiry-, project-, and data-based approach to teaching and learning, taking advantage of opportunities for change in schools, and the evolution from positive education to educating for flourishing at Shipley. Turner argues for redefining the factors we use to measure success (like college admission) and explores how you begin to embed these values within the culture of a school.

Before transitioning to education, Michael G. Turner held roles in the private and public sectors, including serving as an Assistant Managing Director for the City of Philadelphia and a management consultant. Since then, he has served as a teacher, advisor, coach, admissions director, and Head of School, which is the role he serves in currently at The Shipley School.

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In this episode, we sit down with Shipley alumnus Akinwole Garrett ’00. Aki is a man of many interests and has his hands in a slew of incredible projects. By day, he’s a senior business development executive with Lenovo. By night, he’s  the founder and CEO of IMAGIN, a diversified media company focused on film, television, and digital content production, which has produced multiple films, one of which has been shown at prestigious film festivals like Sundance. He also dedicates his time to a handful of institutions and not-for-profit organizations with missions he is passionate about. He does all of this while working to be a loving husband, father, son, and sibling to a large and incredible family.

Aki talks about the primary motivation that fuels him to take on so much—what he calls his insatiable desire to drive impact and make a contribution. He shares his strategies for synergizing it all so that he can be his best self mentally and  physically in both his personal and professional life. Aki is a really incredible human with an inspiring story and outlook on life. Anyone who is interested in learning more about how to flourish and help others do the same will get a lot out of this episode.

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In this episode of Take a Seat, we sat down with Dr. Matt Lee, an expert on the science of flourishing at the Harvard Flourishing Project. In our conversation, we dug into the various components of flourishing (happiness and life satisfaction, physical and mental health, meaning and purpose, character and virtue, and close social relationships), as well as how we might re-imagine our systems of education to better support human flourishing and a regenerative way of life for individuals and our planet.

As the Director of Empirical Research at Harvard’s Human Flourishing Project, Dr. Matt Lee is “integrating the deep wisdom of the humanities with rigorous social science research” to define and investigate the measurable aspects of flourishing. The interdisciplinary program is aimed at pulling together knowledge from a variety of disciplines to better understand and promote human well-being.

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Human Flourishing Measure

2:31 Measuring Well-Being

2:50 Career background

4:51 The Joyous Recovery - Lundy Bancroft

7:08 Domains of flourishing

13:04 Transcend Scott Barry Kaufman

13:30 Why Good Things Happen to Good People Stephen Post

15:02 The Heart of Religion - Matthew Lee, Margaret Poloma & Stephen Post

15:15 Should Pediatricians Prescribe Kindness

16:55 Do schools kill creativity? - Sir Ken Robinsons

25:19 Bruce Perry’s Neurosequential Model

25:47 We Dare Say Love - Na'ilah Suad Nasir, Jarvis Givens & Christopher Chatmon

28:29 Mathematics for Human Flourishing - Francis Su

31:35 Power of a good mentor or teacher

32:44 I and Thou - Martin Buber

35:26 The Science of Abundance - Jim Ritchie-Dunham

39:16 Dr. Paul Wong

42:20 Joy & suffering

43:03 Open Space, Transformative Education, and the Pursuit of Flourishing - Matthew T. Lee, Molly Hartsough, Sam Borick & Brooks Gathagan

44:23 “Students experienced a moment of being seen fully, both in their strengths but also in their flaws, in a classroom context”.

45:06 Is it possible to be seen fully?

46:30 Regenerative soil conditions

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In this episode, we take a seat with Shipley alumna Ali Lambert Voron ’98 and her husband, Mike, to explore the profound importance of love and resilience in overcoming adversity. Ali shares her story of living with alopecia since the age of 16 and her three-year battle with ulcerative colitis later in life. Mike speaks about his own history of dealing with life challenges, including the loss of his mother to brain cancer, looking after his high-needs brother, and the recent realization that his father likely has Aspergers, and reflects on how all of that has fueled his work with Special Olympics and as a principal at a school in Yonkers for kids will special learning needs. The two weave in and out of some of the stories behind these challenging events in their lives, the lessons they’ve learned, and the sense that they can handle anything that comes their way because they always have one another to lean on. We think you'll be inspired by their story.

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In our conversation with flow expert Steven Kotler we explored what flow is. (It’s the biological state in which we generate some incredible neurochemistry, lose our sense of self, experience the dilation of time, become completely absorbed in what we’re doing, and, ultimately, both feel and perform our very best). We talked a little bit about how to get into flow, but mainly focused on its place in schools and learning environments in general. It was an inspiring and thought-provoking back-and-forth and left us with the feeling that we know a lot more than we once did about peak performance, its role in mental health and the good life, and, most importantly, how we can start getting more of it in our lives and in our schools.

Bestselling author and award-winning speaker Steven Kotler is the Executive Director of The Flow Research Collective, a group dedicated to reverse-engineering the flow state and trying to boil it down to a set of heuristics that can help more individuals and organizations experience greater flow in their lives. Steven is a former journalist and has multiple NYT bestselling books to his name, including his most recent title, The Art of the Impossible, which has swept just about every bestseller list out there.

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Our conversation with Shipley alumnus, author, and law student Jesse Wang ’14 focuses on themes from his book, Underdog: 12 Inspirational Stories for the Despondent Law Student, including finding paths to growth, strategies for resilience, and maintaining personal well-being while navigating adversity and performing at a high level. Jesse reflects on his own experiences of growth through struggle in high school and during his early days as a law student. He also shares some tips and tricks to help listeners grow from struggle, too. It was a really enjoyable conversation filled with plenty of food for thought for anyone out there struggling in various ways, but in particular, for recent college graduates trying to find their way in the world and figure out what it is that they want to do and contribute.

Jesse Wang '14 is currently a graduate student in the University of Southern California’s Marshall School of Business, as well as a class action litigation law clerk for Lawyers for Justice, and the managing editor of USC’s Spotlight Entertainment Law Review. Jesse is donating 100% of the proceeds from the sale of his book to USC’s Public Interest Law Foundation and Small Business Clinic. He is currently working on his second book.

Website: https://linktr.ee/wangesque

Facebook: Jesse Wang

Instagram: @wangesque

Linkedin: Jesse Wang

Book: Underdog: 12 Inspirational Stories for the Despondent Law Student

4:06 Jesse’s Shipley story

9:45 Shipley blog post

10:46 Angela Duckworth: GRIT

11:15 Jesse’s educational journey

22:00 Underdog at USC

24:40 Positive stress

25:07 Shipley Alumni Development Series

27:00 Focus on mental health, well-being

29:20 Small wins

36:42 Shawn Achor

37:04 Rick Merrill

40:00 Writing Underdog: 12 Inspirational Stories for the Despondent Law Student

46:17 Advice for college graduates

49:05 Major themes of the book

49:50 Adam Grant: Give and Take

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In our conversation with Shipley alumna Dr. Nicole Christian-Brathwaite ’99, she talks about her own experience as one of the few black students during her time at The Shipley School. We explore the cumulative effects of racial trauma on students’ ability to learn, the importance of representation in education, and how to counteract implicit bias in schools, as well as the potential mental and physical health impacts of racism.

Dr. Nicole Christian-Brathwaite is a medical doctor and nationally-recognized and Board-Certified Adult, Child, and Adolescent Psychiatrist. She’s also the CEO and Founder of Well Minds Psychiatry and Consulting. She has expertise in Perinatal and Postpartum Mental Health, trauma-informed care, mental health in communities of color, school psychiatry, implicit bias, and racism in mental health. Dr. Christian-Brathwaite was selected as a member of the inaugural class of the Women’s Wellness through Equity and Leadership program, sponsored by the American Psychiatric Association and the American Physician’s Foundation, and speaks frequently on topics ranging from implicit bias in schools to combating racism in medicine.

Website: https://www.wellmindsconsulting.com/

Instagram: @drnicolecb

Twitter: @Drnicolecb

Facebook: Dr. Nicole Christian-Brathwaite

6:25 Dr. Christian-Brathwaite’s Story

11:04 Culture shock at school

14:25 Impact of microaggressions

15:40 PTSD from violent acts

17:00 Racism impedes learning

17:55 Microaggressions are like mosquito bites

19:05 Mitigating factors

26:30 Mental health implications

27:40 Philadelphia ACE’s Study

28:30 Racial Trauma

30:40 Lydia Denworth: Friendship

31:40 Why Are All the Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria?

34:30 Buffering impacts of racism

37:00 Scott Barry Kaufman

39:00 Importance of representation

39:51 Dr. Bruce Perry: The Boy Who Was Raised as a Dog

43:15 Dr. Jeff Duncan-Andrade: Hope Required When Growing Roses in Concrete

45:10 Emphasis on equity

50:10 What now?

54:25 Student representation

56:00 Success for who?

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Our conversation with executive coach and Shipley alumna Fredricka Brecht ’68 explored her insights from years of experience working with highly intelligent, motivated leaders, along with some of the conscious and effective practices she helps them employ. We touched on the importance of having grace and emotional intelligence as a part of one’s leadership style and, perhaps most importantly, understanding that caring about all the stakeholders of a community or organization is one of the surest paths of success and fulfillment. Fred shared some strategies for harnessing this beautiful power of collective action and well-being, the neurochemistry it causes, and the ultimate satisfaction and success it leads to. It was a fascinating conversation, filled with insights for anyone looking to become a better leader of a team, business or institution.

Fredericka Brecht has spent the better part of the past two decades as an award-winning coach to groups of C-suite executives for Vistage, one of the world’s largest and most premier executive coaching firms. Before that, she founded Pennzoil’s international division, building it to $80 million in sales, ten overseas manufacturing sites, and sales in 50 foreign countries.

Facebook: Fredricka Brecht

Linkedin: Fredricka Brecht

Twitter: @fbchair

4:30 The Shipley School motto breakdown

7:13 Conscious Capitalism

7:53 Simon Sinek

8:45 Accelerator effect

9:06 Arbinger Institute

9:14 The Anatomy of Peace

9:17 Leadership and Self-Deception

9:21 The Outward Mindset

12:18 Zig Ziggler

13:40 Compassion and grace

14:20 Peer group effectiveness

15:53 Story of Vistage

19:30 What is a Vistage Chair and Master Chair

23:12 Tangible Takeaways

26:10 Texas Business Radio

28:18 Courage vs. Grace

30:15 Lydia Denworth’s book Friendship

31:36 Vistage speakers

32:43 Outward Mindset

33:30 Group process after the speaker

36:45 Vistage in schools

37:07 Chris Barbic, KIPP

38:20 Peer Groups in Schools

40:00 Patrick Lencioni

40:40 Individual and Collective level thinking

42:20 Margaret Heffernan: Forget the Pecking Order at Work

45:15 Go-to Activity

47:40 Routine

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In this episode, our conversation tapped into Kristin Weber’s role as business owner, mom, and world-class athlete. We talked a lot about her history and how her parents, close friends, and educational experiences shaped and supported her interests from a very early age, enabling her to follow her passions and turn them into a successful and fulfilling life. We dove into some of the habits and behaviors that have allowed her to flourish in both business and athletics and that have helped her cultivate a synergistic lifestyle that facilitates both. Perhaps most importantly, Kristin gave us insight into living a life of synergy, which allows her to still be the kind of parent she wants to be, which I think she would say is ultimately her greatest accomplishment. What’s Kristin’s secret sauce for flourishing in all three of these important areas? A little bit of focus on the “me,” or her self-care, and a heck of a lot of support from the “we,” her community of close friends and family. Something I think any busy parent or top performer can relate to.

About our Guest: Shipley alumna Kristin Gustafson Weber ’90 has won two U.S. national titles and medaled three times in the Masters world championships of cyclocross (a multilap off-road bike race that often involves inclement weather and horrible riding conditions). As the owner and creative director of Sugar Design, her list of past clients includes Pepsi, Schwinn Cycling & Fitness Co., and SmartWool. To top it all off, she’s the busy mother of three.

Show Notes

Website: http://sugardesign.com/

I
nstagram: @weberkristin

Facebook: Kristen Weber

Episode outline

3:25 What is Cyclocross

6:48 Origins of cyclocross

7:54 Athletic upbringing

9:00 Business owner

10:20 Steven Kotler: The Rise of Superman: Decoding the Science of Ultimate Human Performance

13:27 Friendship (talking about Shipley friends and teachers)

16:40 Intrinsic motivation

18:02 Ashley Sargant shoutout

18:25 Worthy rivals

19:20 Worthy rivals in cyclocross

20:40 Synergy (work/life balance)

23:40 Autonomy learned at Shipley (love of learning)

25:10 Angela Duckworth: Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance

26:40 Scott Barry Kauffman plug (grit misconception)

27:40 Strategies for being “gritty”

29:04 Growth motivation

30:18 Finding the right balance (okay to say no!)

31:48 The power of a positive no

32:10 What she taught her kids

34:55 How to reach peak performance & focus on family

38:15 Fun questions!

39:00 Took an avalanche course

39:49 Importance of rituals (anchoring source of connection with family)

42:10 What are you hopeful about?

43:33 Find what it is that makes you happy

44:25 Snap fingers, impart wisdom/ wish

44:45 Have an hour a day to yourself

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Our conversation with Lydia Denworth touched on new findings from neuroscience that show us the impact that relationships have on us, even down to the genetic level. We touched on the different traits of positive, nourishing friendships, as well as the ambivalence that characterizes some of the others. Lydia walked us through the different ways we interact with friends and friendships throughout the various periods of our lives, and shared some thoughts on how we might better leverage the benefits of life’s fundamental bond in young people, through education. It was a rich conversation, filled with gems of thought for parents, professionals, or just any person looking to answer the call to level up to something better.

Shipley alumna Lydia Denworth ’84 is a best-selling popular science writer. She has written on a broad range of scientific topics for outlets like The Wall Street Journal, New York Times, and Psychology Today, and has served as a contributing editor to Scientific American. Her third and most recent book is the New York Times bestseller, Friendship: The Evolution, Biology and Extraordinary Power of Life’s Fundamental Bond.

Show Notes - Lydia DenworthWebsite: www.lydiadenworth.com

Instagram: @lydiadenworth

Twitter: @LydiaDenworth

Brain Waves Blog: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/brain-waves

Other books by Lydia: Toxic Truth, I Can Hear You Whisper,Friendship: The Evolution, Biology, and Extraordinary Power of Life’s Fundamental Bond.

Contributed Essays: Torn by Samantha Parent Walravens

Newsletter Sign-up: https://lydiadenworth.com/newsletter/

4:59 Why friendship?

13:37 Defining friendship (stable, positive, cooperative/reciprocal)

19:04 Lunstad Meta analysis

19:27 Research on loneliness

20:28 Late 70’ & 80’s Framingham Heart Study

21:27 Explaining Lunstad Meta analysis

25:20 Loneliness as a biological warning system

25:33 Loneliness & Hunger - MIT Preliminary Report

32:02 - E. O Wilson, backlash about sociobiology

36:00 Burt Uchino & Julian Holt Lunstad on ambivalent relationships

47:20 WEIRD acronym

49:38 Daniel Hruschka (Friendship: Development, Ecology, and Evolution of a Relationship)

51:30 The Passenger Dilemma

55:00 School/Education can be done better

56:03 Importance of Friendships (adolescents)

1:01:40 Zoom learning impact

1:03:30 Scott Barry Kauffman Transcend: The New Science of Self-Actualization

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In this episode, we dig into some of the science behind intelligence, IQ, and peak potential, and explore Dr. Kaufman's ideas around self-actualization and the sailboat of human needs. We touched on the importance of meaning and purpose in life, the tremendous impact belonging and positive relationships have on us, and explored notions of passion, authenticity and coherence. Finally, we didn’t miss the opportunity to chat with Dr. Kaufman about his ideas for a more humanistic approach to education, what he calls a system of inspiration, not evaluation.

Dr. Scott Barry Kaufman is one of the world’s most revered psychologists with a wide range of areas of expertise, including his academic work on intelligence, self-actualization, and the satisfaction of our most core human needs. Dr. Kaufman has published nine books and countless peer-reviewed and popular articles for Psychology Today, Scientific American, and other publications. He is the creator and host of The Psychology Podcast. Kaufman has taught courses on well-being and intelligence at Columbia, NYU, and the University of Pennsylvania. In his most recent book, Transcend: The New Science of Self-Actualization, he revisits Abraham Maslow’s work and proposes a new conceptualization of human needs.

Website: https://scottbarrykaufman.com/Beautiful Minds NewsletterInstagram: @scottbarrykaufman Twitter: @sbkaufmanFacebookThe Psychology Podcast Course: https://scottbarrykaufman.com/course/

**[4:35] What is SBK About

[7:45] Important components of intelligence

[8:28] Twice Exceptional Children

[12:08] Are there multiple paths to greatness?

[14:34] Sailboat Metaphor Overview

[17:15] Richard Wiseman****’s research on luck

[17:50] Science of connection & meaning

[21:05] Inspiration for Transcend: Going Beyond the Self

[24:52] Meaning and purpose

How young people feel about school - Study done by the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence****[27:27] Sailboat Metaphor in Schools

[27:49] Humanistic Education

[29:46] Goals - have some vision of what you are setting sail to

[31:14] Ikigai - Reason for being

[33:43-36:25] Psychologically Rich Life

[37:07] Getting out of comfort Zone - Karen Horney - Self-analysis

[39:00] Criticisms of Carol Dweck and growth mindset - The Psychology Podcast**[40:10] Primary Core Drivers (Status Driven, Security Driven, or Growth Driven)

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Delve into the science and stories of flourishing with Nick Holton and The Shipley School.