Graceful Atheist Podcast: Recent Episodes
David Ames
A secular humanist podcast about Secular Grace after deconstruction and deconversion.
The podcast takes an honest look at stories of faith transition from a life-altering faith, to doubt and deconstruction, to deconversion, and finally, to a thriving graceful life post-deconversion.
My name is David, and I am trying to be the Graceful Atheist. Join me and be graceful human beings.
https://gracefulatheist.com/?gaid=gapdsc Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
Mathew Taylor, co-host of Still Unbelievable!, returns to the podcast to discuss why we podcast.Links
Matthew on Twitter:
https://twitter.com/vteclimey
Confessions of a YEC blog:
https://confessionsofayec.wordpress.com/
"God takes the good people early” post:
https://confessionsofayec.wordpress.com/2012/03/08/god-takes-the-good-people-early/
Reason Press:
https://reasonpress.net/
"Still Unbelievable!” the book:
https://reasonpress.net/SU1EPodcasts:
Still Unbelievable!
https://anchor.fm/still-unbelievable
Ask An Atheist Anything
https://anchor.fm/reasonpress
Previous episode
https://gracefulatheist.com/2019/06/20/matthew-taylor-confessions-of-a-young-earth-creationist/
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/12/30/matthew-taylor-why-we-podcast/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Graceful Atheist Podcast Merch!
https://www.teepublic.com/user/gracefulatheistpodcast
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Sara. Sara grew up in a Canadian Mennonite community and embraced it wholeheartedly. She was surrounded by evangelical Christianity and she thrived.
As a young adult, she married and followed her husband into ministry. While he led, she helped as was expected of her. It didn’t occur to her until years later how little her own leadership skills had to be set aside.
Sara’s husband started deconstructing his beliefs before she did, but as he was learning, she was also learning. Years later, she knew he’d become an atheist before he did.
It wasn’t easy, but they made space for one another to learn and grow and move down their own paths. Today, Sara is a spiritual director for others and doesn’t have a specific label for herself, and it works just fine.
“There’s a whole host of ways of being in the world…”
Links
Sara’s website
https://prairiethistle.ca/
Facebook
https://www.facebook.com/prairiethistle
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/12/17/sara-christian-humanism/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Graceful Atheist Podcast Merch!
https://www.teepublic.com/user/gracefulatheistpodcast
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Beth. Beth grew up in a fundamentalist Christian home that revered James Dobson, Jerry Falwell and all those who created the “Moral Majority.” Her father was a pastor whose sermons centered on the End Times and protecting their families from the “shifting culture,” (read: all the movements happening in the 60’s and 70’s).
As a teen, she lived a double life, keeping plenty of secrets from her parents. However, as a young adult, followed all the rules with the expectation that the “umbrella of God’s protection” would take care of her. It didn’t.
It took decades of trying to do what was “right” and watching the promises of the Church come to naught before she finally took the leap out of Christianity. She now identifies as SBNR—spiritual but not religious. Beth is now able to trust her own judgment and make decisions that are best for her. No “umbrella of protection” needed.
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/12/10/beth-deconstruction-from-the-moral-majority/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Graceful Atheist Podcast Merch!
https://www.teepublic.com/user/gracefulatheistpodcast
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Arline interviews this week’s guest, Andrew. Andrew is a self-named atheist “paleo-nerd.” He grew up home-schooled in a fundamentalist church in southern California. His whole schooling was religious and that included Young Earth Creationism.
In high school, Andrew struggled with his shy nature and some depressive episodes. The church didn’t seem to have room for people like him. As a young adult, finally making his own decisions and living a life without fundamentalism everywhere, Andrew saw how much he could accomplish on his own. He had had the resources inside him but hadn’t known it.
Now, as an atheist, he’s figuring out what life looks like for himself. It includes a wife and kids, online friends, lots of dinosaurs, and a happiness that isn’t perfect or perpetual but is enough.
Links
Dino Dad Reviews
https://dinodadreviews.com/
Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/dinodadreviews/
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/12/03/andrew-dino-dad-reviews/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Graceful Atheist Podcast Merch!
https://www.teepublic.com/user/gracefulatheistpodcast
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Arline interviews this week’s guest, Racquelle. Racquelle grew up in Canada in the Seventh Day Adventist church. Conspiracy theories were common in her household. Some of them she bought into.
Throughout her life she went through periods of doubt but something kept bringing her back to Church. A sense of obligation and expectation never left her.
Eventually, Racquelle deconverted from her faith and deconstructed the conspiracy theories. She now has an interesting perspective on the deconstruction process.
Links
Facebook
https://www.facebook.com/racquelle.pilon
Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/racquelle_p/
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/11/26/racquelle-deconversion-from-sda-and-conspiracy-theories/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Graceful Atheist Podcast Merch!
https://www.teepublic.com/user/gracefulatheistpodcast
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Arline interviews this week's guest, Andy Neal of Andy Films And Hikes fame. He is self described as a "plus size hiking influencer."
Andy tells his story of deconstruction, acceptance of his body and his joy in nature. He is an inspiration to all to get outdoors and experience nature.
Links
Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/andyfilmsandhikes/
Link Tree
https://linktr.ee/AndyNeal
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/11/19/andy-neal-andy-films-and-hikes/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Graceful Atheist Podcast Merch!
https://www.teepublic.com/user/gracefulatheistpodcast
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Natalie from New Zealand tells Arlene here story. She grew up Pentecostal participating in church. In her young adulthood she converted to Mormonism.
She saw that as woman her role was limited and was finding it difficult to accept the church's perspective on LGBQT issues.
Eventually Natalie deconverted. She is thankful for her kids' sake who later came out as queer. Natalie now finds time in nature and the forest life giving.
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/11/12/natalie-pentecostal-to-mormon-to-atheist/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Graceful Atheist Podcast Merch!
https://www.teepublic.com/user/gracefulatheistpodcast
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Jeff grew up in his words “a very religious household.” He attended a large Southern Baptist church.
In college he fell in love with the seriousness of Calvinism after reading John Piper’s Desiring God. He left seminary early to become a minster because he felt time pressure to be “on mission” for God.
After three pastors he knew committed suicide in one year, Jeff began to deconstruct.
Today he is agnostic and finds therapy and mindfulness helpful in his life.
Links
Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/Backwoodspiper
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/11/05/jeff-deconstruction-of-a-southern-baptist-minister/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Graceful Atheist Podcast Merch!
https://www.teepublic.com/user/gracefulatheistpodcast
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Megan. Megan grew up in a fundamentalist Catholic home with an irrationally religious mother and an absent father. As a teen, she was invited to an evangelical bible study after school and after some serious “love bombing” by the youth group, she was a part of a community.
“You get ‘loved bombed’ when you walk into a new church or into a new youth group, and they make you feel like you are the most welcome you will ever be and that your community is so indeed of you and your specific experience…”
Evangelical Christianity worked well for Megan for years. She had questions and concerns but nothing that made her leave for good until she knew one of her kids was possibly LGBTQ. That was when she knew she’d have to figure out the religious future of her family.
Now, she is an atheist and has never been more free. She’s living out secular grace, sealing up her boundaries, and being the whole person she ’s always needed to be.
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/10/29/megan-catholic-to-evangelical-to-atheist/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Graceful Atheist Podcast Merch!
https://www.teepublic.com/user/gracefulatheistpodcast
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Kris. Kris grew up in a home with much wounding and suffering, an irreligious home that would shape her desire for God as a young adult. She became a christian when she was 22—a “poor, broken young mom.”
For years, Christianity worked well for her. She found community, built a family, made friends. Church gave her a place to use her abilities and passions, but there was always a glass ceiling.
In 2017, she and a friend went to a “biblical archeology” seminar. For the first time, Kris was learning from professors, not pastors, and the questions started coming. It wasn’t long before Kris realized she couldn’t go to church or be in a home group. She didn’t have the language for what was happening, but now she knows it was the beginning of her deconstruction.
A strong leader with a kind and compassionate heart—and a love for Ozzy Osbourne—Kris is enjoying the life she’s found beyond religion.
Interact
David's intevew on Harmonic Atheist
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NMKNwVRzlJk
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/10/22/kris-former-christian-leader-to-the-least-of-these/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Graceful Atheist Podcast Merch!
https://www.teepublic.com/user/gracefulatheistpodcast
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Jeremy Schumacher. Jeremy’s story begins in the Wisconsin Evangelical Lutheran Synod and it was as culty as it sounds. He started questioning the beliefs when he was ten, but it took twenty more years before he was able to leave.
“Two things really kept me in [Christianity] longer than I needed to stay or wanted to stay: fear of hell…and everyone I knew and interacted with was Lutheran, just not having any sense of community outside of the church…”
Jeremy is currently a “licensed marriage & family therapist with additional specialties in religious trauma and sports performance.” See his complete bio here.
Links
Wellness With Jer
https://wellnesswithjer.com/
Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/wellnesswithjer/
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/10/15/jeremy-schumacher-wellness-with-jer/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Graceful Atheist Podcast Merch!
https://www.teepublic.com/user/gracefulatheistpodcast
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week is a solo episode with David talking about the state of the podcast.
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/10/08/graceful-atheist-solo-october-2023/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Graceful Atheist Podcast Merch!
https://www.teepublic.com/user/gracefulatheistpodcast
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Mandi. Mandi grew up in a mixed Jewish and Christian home, attending a Messianic temple. She loved every minute of it as a kid and cherishes her memories.
In high school and as a young adult, though, she began to ask questions, and as we’ve seen in religion time and time again, her questions were dismissed.
After incredible and full years of life—moving to Israel, returning to Georgia, joining an Orthodox Jewish community, getting married, and having children—she identifies as an agnostic atheist.
“It’s been so good for my mental health, to not believe, to stop praying.”
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/10/01/mandi-deconversion-from-messianic-judaism/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Graceful Atheist Podcast Merch!
https://www.teepublic.com/user/gracefulatheistpodcast
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Jordon. Jordon comes from a long family line of Mennonites but Jordon was bookish and musical and never quite fit in.
He grew up in the church, but with two older brothers already having left the church, by 21 he was also out. He’d never had a television, gone to public school, or really knew anything beyond the small bubble he was in. University changed all of that.
“The sense of community I was getting from the friendships I was making outside of these church communities…was really kind of gratifying.”
Over years of therapy and some world-traveling, Jordon has come to terms with his upbringing. He’s found fulfillment as a professor, discussing philosophy with students and continuing to learn and grow.
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/09/24/jordon-mennonite-to-philosopher/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Graceful Atheist Podcast Merch!
https://www.teepublic.com/user/gracefulatheistpodcast
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Nora. Nora grew up in Argentina, the granddaughter of Italian immigrants, and Argentina still has her heart.
When Nora was in middle school, her father believed God wanted him to become a missionary to the US. The family’s move to California was all loss, culture shock, and homesickness for Nora.
Between church doctrine on divorce, enduring an abusive marriage, Christian Nationalism, and questions that kept coming, Nora stayed in Christianity as long as she could stand it. She truly tried to make it all work.
“I did it on my own…I can say, for sure, God was not there for me, not emotionally, not spiritually, obviously not practically.”Nora is now “allergic to spirituality.”
She’s an atheist, no longer needing any god or religion to dictate her life. She lives out secular grace, aligning her life with her deepest values.
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/09/17/nora-mk-to-the-usa/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Graceful Atheist Podcast Merch!
https://www.teepublic.com/user/gracefulatheistpodcast
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Tracey. Tracey spent her childhood in a white American Christian home where Focus on the Family reigned and “Obey right away” was the expectation.
She was a believer as an adolescent but began asking hard questions in high school. As a young adult, she saw how prideful the leaders were and how easily Christians were pulled in.
“That’s a theme through my whole experience of Christianity…Christians are actually attracted to narcissists…People are drawn to or encouraged to seek answers from narcissists.”
As an adult, Tracey became Catholic, only to see the same threads running through—narcissism, misogyny, racism, abuse and more.
In the past few years, Tracey’s found solace in yoga, meditation and nature. She’s grown and been changed, not through the religious
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/09/10/tracey-focus-on-the-family-to-none/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Graceful Atheist Podcast Merch!
https://www.teepublic.com/user/gracefulatheistpodcast
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Mary Justice, the heart behind the delightful Instagram account, @maryfairyboberry.
Mary is an international adoptee who grew up in an emotionally and verbally abusive Seventh-Day Adventist home. Between home and church, there were rules that dictated her entire life.
“It’s just so much fanaticism.”
As an adult, she has a family she cares for without the abuse or micro-managing from high-control religion.
She’s been through a lot, but she’s choosing to laugh and enjoy her present life. Check out her Instagram account @maryfairyboberry for her own personal journey, cute kid videos, information on autism, and hilarious tweets about parenting.
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/09/02/mary-justice-deconstruction-from-sda/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Graceful Atheist Podcast Merch!
https://www.teepublic.com/user/gracefulatheistpodcast
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Amanda. Amanda comes from a rather surprising brand of Christianity she refers to as the “Serpent Seed Pentecostal Cult.” She goes into detail, and it’s quite a ride.
Various things happened throughout her adolescence that made her wonder if Christianity was true, but her mother would violently put a quick stop to those doubts. By 17, Amanda left home to live with a friend, but that couldn’t last long.
Amanda spent a decade trying out every religion under the sun but never found the one that could give real, solid answers.
“Everybody thinks that they have the answer but nobody does.”
Today, she knows she doesn’t need the gods to dictate her life. She’s living it to the fullest and always moving forward.
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/08/27/amanda-deconversion-from-an-unnamed-cult/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Graceful Atheist Podcast Merch!
https://www.teepublic.com/user/gracefulatheistpodcast
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is MJ, the heart and mind behind the Instagram account, @dissident_daughters
MJ grew up in a conservative evangelical home where Focus on the Family reigned and her whole world consisted of family, church friends, and a few Christian homeschooling families. She believed wholeheartedly, feeling all the existential pressure as a child to “save” everyone around her.
As a young woman, MJ was surrounded by social workers while in college, and these colleagues were curious. They didn’t ask theological questions; they asked political questions, but for MJ it was all connected. She went to her pastor and was dismissed again and again.
“I started asking myself, What are the criteria? What are [church leaders] really looking for? They’re looking for somebody who doesn’t question, doesn’t challenge the status quo, doesn’t have a viewpoint that encompasses anything that includes the world along with Christianity.”
Now MJ uses her love of books and art to encourage others to hear different perspectives—one’s inner life, relationships, systemic injustices, religion, and spirituality. Besides lengthening Arline’s personal To-Be-Read list, MJ’s Instagram has shown her that whatever one is convinced is true, there are other possible ways to view it.
Links
Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/dissident_daughters
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/08/20/mj-dissident-daughters/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Graceful Atheist Podcast Merch!
https://www.teepublic.com/user/gracefulatheistpodcast
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Dr. Darrel Ray is the founder and President of the Board of Directors of Recovering from Religion and the founder and project leader of the Secular Therapy Project. See his full bio here.
Dr. Ray grew up in a Christian home but was already skeptical of certain claims at the age of twelve. He stayed in church—singing and teaching—but was relieved to finally leave the church as an adult.
He has decades of experience in psychology and has helped countless people who’ve been harmed by religion.
“I’m guessing there are more people throughout history that have been traumatized by religion than any other single thing. Religion has built-in abuse.”
Links
Recovering From Religion
https://www.recoveringfromreligion.org/
Secular Therapy Project
https://www.seculartherapy.org/
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/08/06/darrel-ray-recovering-from-religion/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Graceful Atheist Podcast Merch!
https://www.teepublic.com/user/gracefulatheistpodcast
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
CW: sexual abuse; suicidal ideation
This week’s guest is Religious Trauma Life Coach, Mary Burkhart. See her full bio here.
Mary grew up in the Apostolic Pentecostal Church, and her family’s devotion goes back generations.
When she was little, unspeakable things happened to Mary, but their church self-righteously dismissed the situation, forcing her mom and her to move. They found different churches; Mary hoped these would be different.
Between working behind the scenes in another church and seeing the “same ugliness,” she’d seen before and a silly question asked by a college friend, Mary’s uncertainties started to pile up. She was still a believer but she needed sturdier answers than Christianity was giving her.
“It’s not about being hurt or about hurt feelings. You leave [the Church] because things keep compiling, things keep compounding. That’s why.”
After more than fifteen years out of religion, Mary coaches others through their own journeys of religious deconstruction with Religion In Remission. Her work is a grand example of secular grace.
Links
Site
https://religioninremission.com/
Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/religion_in_remission/
Facebook
https://m.facebook.com/RiRLifeCoach
https://m.facebook.com/religioninremission
YouTube
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCE0BqfCB0iPQT2zmxbj66Rw
Religion In Remission Podcast
https://religioninremissionpodcast.buzzsprout.com/
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/07/30/mary-burkhart-religion-in-remission/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Graceful Atheist Podcast Merch!
https://www.teepublic.com/user/gracefulatheistpodcast
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
You’re going to want to grab a cozy drink and pull up your favorite note-taking app because this episode is jam-packed!
Former guest, Daniel shared his deconversion story here, and now he returns with a lesson on the psychology of modern—and often, predatory—apologetics. He knows his stuff, so prepare to learn a few things.
“The target audience of apologetics is actually believers, and the purpose of apologetics is to reduce cognitive dissonance.”
Links
Daniel’s first episode
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/10/09/daniel-office-of-the-skeptic/
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/07/16/daniel-psychology-of-apologetics/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Graceful Atheist Podcast Merch!
https://www.teepublic.com/user/gracefulatheistpodcast
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is artist Stephanie Stalvey. You can see her full bio here. She is the artist behind Instagram’s @stephanie.stalvey.artist.
Stephanie was a “90’s church kid” attending various evangelical churches when she was young. She took her beliefs seriously, and it wasn’t until her twenties that a sudden loss forced her to question whether life was as simple as she’d been taught.
When Stephanie became a mother, she truly left fundamentalist religion. “I needed to let God expand into whatever God might be."
Now she lives without a label, allowing her values and beliefs about humanity and divinity to change as she changes.
Her art speaks to those of us who’ve left religion, reminding us that “…we are, in our hearts and in our inner essence, good and pure and sacred and not depraved.”
Links
Website
https://stephaniestalvey.com/
Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/stephanie.stalvey.artist/
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/07/09/stephanie-stalvey-artist/
Graceful Atheist Podcast Merch!
https://www.teepublic.com/user/gracefulatheistpodcast
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Benoit Kim. He is a “Veteran, Penn-educated Policymaker turned Psychotherapist, & Podcaster at Discover More.” Benoit is a Christian, creating space for deep and meaningful conversations and stories. The Discover More podcast is a show for independent thinkers with an emphasis on mental health. Benoit is currently a forensic clinician at Project 180.
Links
Discover More Podcast
https://www.discovermorepodcast.com/
YouTube
https://www.youtube.com/@DiscoverMorePodcast
LinkTree
https://kite.link/DiscoverMore133
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/07/02/benoit-kim-discover-more/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Graceful Atheist Podcast Merch!
https://www.teepublic.com/user/gracefulatheistpodcast
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Content Warning: Sexual abuse, spiritual abuse, severe mental health disorders
Kyler’s story is one of “beauty from ashes”. He lives with dissociative identity disorder, a category of CPTSD. Kyler is one distinct personality in the “system”. The adults in his life abused him as a child—would not keep him safe—and so his brain stepped in and made a way to survive.
Kyler watched the church fail him and his family over and over, refusing to help or even acknowledge the abuse and trauma.
“This person who has PTSD has no clue where it’s from, has all this trauma, pain, and hurt…and the church just wants to throw Bible verses and actually doesn’t want to help you.”
Today, Kyler is a completely different person than when he was young. He’s free to embrace his whole self without shame and fear, and the future is radiant.
Links
988
https://988lifeline.org/
Recovering From Religion
https://www.recoveringfromreligion.org/
Secular Therapy Project
https://www.seculartherapy.org/
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/06/25/kyler-cptsd/
Graceful Atheist Podcast Merch!
https://www.teepublic.com/user/gracefulatheistpodcast
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Christian Lomsdalen. Christian is the current president of the Norwegian Humanist Association and a Ph.D. candidate at the University of Bergen studying the didactics (science) of religion.
Christian grew up in an ordinary Christian Norwegian family as “Christmas Christians”. He went to church for Christmas and other holidays, and that was about it.
“I identified as a Christian…a quiet liberal Christian, probably. I guess a lot of the evangelicals in the United States probably wouldn’t have recognized me as a Christian.”
Around eighteen, Christian realized he didn’t believe in God, though he read the Bible and liked the stories. Since then, however, he has lived a humanist life.
Christian shares many of the differences between Norway and the US, tackling religion and politics. The Norwegian Humanist Association is doing great work, and it’s a good model for other countries moving forward.
Links
Norwegian Humanist Association
https://www.human.no/
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/06/18/christian-lomsdalen-norwegian-humanist-association/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Benjamin Faye, also known as @heytherebenji.Benji was adopted when he was young and during middle school, his adoptive parents suddenly “wanted a spiritual life” and started going to church.
His life as an adoptee was difficult. Benji questioned whether he belonged in the family and things only got worse as he got older. His adoptive parent became abusive and in his early twenties, he had to leave.
He hoped the church could be the place he could question and process his grief and uncertainty but it wasn’t.
“…on some level, I knew that…there would be no room for me to process [my questions]. It would just begin and end with Jesus, and it’s very, very difficult to have a conversation when there’s a preset ending to it.”
Benji and his partner moved from church to church, hoping to find where they could fully belong. Skip ahead to 2020 and all the covert racism that has always been in the background of white evangelicalism became blindingly obvious. They both had to get out.
Today, Benji is using his online platform to share his own story and to be a place of find empathy and compassion. His work is a great example of living out secular grace.
Links
Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/heytherebenji/
TikTok
https://www.tiktok.com/@heytherebenji
Important Things with Ben and Carole
https://pod.link/1497773808
Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/important_things
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/06/11/heytherebenji/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Ben Reed. Ben grew up in the Church of Christ with a cappella music, no clapping, no raised hands, no prophecies, no miracles, but also no demons.
“Compared to the more charismatic denominations, the Church of Christ is pretty boring…I think that’s kind of why I stayed so long because it wasn’t that exhausting.”
Ben’s years in the church were good—no cognitive dissonance or serious trauma—until 2020.
“It wasn’t until Covid hit that I really started waking up, and I saw how Christians were acting about the masking and the vaccines, and I was thinking, Do you not see the moral implications and the examples that we are supposed to set here?”
By 2022 and a chance encounter with some Mormons, too many questions were surfacing. Cheekily thanking “the gods of atheism,” Ben is now able to ask questions and expect serious evidence before he can be convinced of something.
It seems that “the promises of Christianity are found outside of it”.
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/06/04/ben-reed-deconversion-from-church-of-christ/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Shifra Lowen. Shifra grew up in a small, well-controlled Hasidic community in Canada. As a girl, Shifra wanted to do everything according to the rules of their village. At the same, she desperately wanted forbidden things, like a kitten or a pet bird.
At 17, her marriage was arranged to someone she knew and even liked, and Shifra was on Cloud 9 for a while, though suspicious of her own happiness. Then her husband did something unthinkable.
“…Imagine my shock and fear when I found out that my husband visited a library.”
Visiting a Jewish library was only the beginning of Shifra’s world coming apart, but slowly she would realize it was all for good—for the good of their whole family.
Years later, after much learning and growing, Shifra and her family are thriving, living in accordance with their own values and not someone else’s rules.
Links
Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/yiddishe_/
YouTube
https://www.youtube.com/@shifralowen
Patreon
http://www.patreon.com/ClaraWasserstein
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/05/27/shifra-out-of-hasidic-orthodoxy/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is comedian and writer, Holly Laurent. See her full bio and work here.
Holly tells a bit of her story, growing up in a fundamentalist evangelical household. From the fear of demons to eternal conscious torment, Holly is still dismantling the indoctrination. In comedy, she’s found a way to express her “voice that always got [her] in trouble” as well as an accepting community, something she struggled to find in the church.
Her podcast Mega has a new five-part mini-series parodying the downfall of an infamous Mars Hill pastor. Episode 1 of “The Rise and Fall of Twin Hills” drops May 21. It sounds like it’s going to be great fun!
Links
Holly’s site
https://www.hollylaurent.com/
Mega the Podcast
https://www.megathepodcast.com/
Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/hollylaurent/
https://www.instagram.com/megathepodcast/
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/05/21/holly-laurent-the-rise-and-fall-of-twin-hills/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Josh de Keijzer, PhD. Josh writes at After God’s End: Fragments of a Post-Christian narrative
Josh grew up in an evangelical home in the Netherlands. He knew his family was “set apart,” different from the mainstream Dutch culture.
“I realized…I had been brought up as an evangelical…We were always part of a minority.”
As a teenager, Josh took his faith seriously, so he had a hard time with the adults in the church. Their actions did not line up with what they believed, and the hypocrisy was rampant.
Josh always wanted to visit the US and was able to attend university and seminary in the States. In seminary, the questions really began.
“[I was at] a solidly evangelical seminary but there were plenty of people who did a lot of questioning. I have to credit them for opening my eyes…”
Josh’s questions led him out of the Christian church, but he hasn’t given up on spirituality. He gives meaning to his life by living with compassion and love for others, and what a beautiful thing to behold.
Links
Substack
https://joshdekeyzer.substack.com/
Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/aftergodsend/
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/05/14/josh-de-keijzer-after-gods-end/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is author Jo Lloyd Johnson. Jo grew up in a “non-denominational charismatic commune”. She spent her adolescence in various churches, but they weren’t as “Spirit-filled” as she was taught they could be.
She married young and the first years of marriage were difficult. There was alcohol abuse, church shopping, and the difficulties that come with having young children.
She and her husband needed the church to be a place of deep and meaningful relationships, but it wasn’t.
“When we started seeing church as a social club [with no depth], we were like, ‘No. This is not what we thought it was…’”
By 2018, Jo realized the Church was steeped in Patriarchy. She had been fine with “a woman’s place” until she wasn’t.
Now Jo has used writing as a way to process the trauma and emotions she’s experienced and her book, Silenced in Eden, is helping others along their own journeys.
Links
Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/jolloydjohnson/
Silenced In Eden
https://amzn.to/3nBRBYy
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/05/07/joanna-johnson-silenced-in-eden/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Cat Delmar. Cat grew up in a nominally Seventh-day Adventist family. The SDA churches, however, were anything but nominal. They had all the rules, from no caffeine to no pierced ears.
“There’s a lot of control of the body [in Seventh-Day Adventism].”
At sixteen, Cat took ownership of her faith and started going to church on her own, but she never quite fit in. By her twenties, she realized that the difficult questions in adulthood don’t have easy “Biblical” answers. Before she knew it, she’s figured out that the SDA church doesn’t have the answers and that perhaps no one does.
Today, Cat doesn’t need solid answers. She finds peace within herself and in her connection with nature. Cat’s story is one you’ll want to hear!
Links
Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/catmangrove/
Link Tree
https://linktr.ee/catdelmar
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/04/30/cat-delmar-former-seventh-day-adventist/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Stephanie, a Deconversion Anonymous group member. Stephanie grew up in the Assemblies of God church as a Missionary Kid for most of her childhood. Her younger years held all the trappings of white American evangelicalism, from conservative Christian school curricula to a paralyzing fear of going to hell forever.
“The ‘hell belief’? It’s a sticky one.”
Stephanie’s beliefs, however, had been set on precarious foundations: Christians are good and everyone else is bad; the Bible is true and inerrant; the Earth may look old, but it is only thousands of years old. Stephanie made friends outside the church as a young adult, and these new relationships plus great documentaries and books cracked open the bedrocks of her faith.
It’s been a long time since she deconverted, and she is living a life she loves by loving others without reservation. This is true secular grace, Humanism 2.0
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/04/23/stephanie-deconversion-of-an-mk/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Kelly. Kelly was raised as a daughter in a traditional evangelical household, “indoctrinated from diaperhood.”
They grew up perfectionistic, depressed, timid, and anxious, given Christian cliches about ‘God always being with them’ through their depression. Who they really needed were queer, whole, mentally healthy adult mentors.
“There was a dizzying array of mental exercises I had to engage in to keep the faith.”
Today, Kelly is living their truest life with wisdom and compassion. It’s been said that we become the person we would have felt safe with as a child, and Kelly has done that beautifully.
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/04/16/kelly-you-are-enough/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Bart D. Ehrman, the James A. Gray Distinguished Professor at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. His new book is Armageddon: What the Bible Really Says about the End.
Is the book of Revelation a prophecy of future catastrophe? Is it a book of hope? Or is it a book of violence and wrath?
In Armageddon, Bart delves into the most misunderstood—and possibly the most dangerous—book of the Bible, exploring the horrifying social and political consequences of expecting an imminent apocalypse and offering a fascinating tour through three millennia of Judeo-Christian thinking about how our world will end.
Bart’s work has been a part of many of our deconstructions. In my interview with Bart, we get to hear his faith transition. We learn from his New Testament expertise. But most surprising of all, we learn what a nice guy he is.
Links
Armageddon: What the Bible Really Says about the End
https://amzn.to/3KjLW0i
Website
https://www.bartehrman.com/
Blog
https://ehrmanblog.org/
Misquoting Jesus with Bart Ehrman Podcast
https://www.bartehrman.com/podcast/
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/04/09/bart-d-ehrman-armageddon/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
TW: sexual violence; intimate partner violence; postpartum PTSD
This week’s guest is Grace. Grace was fortunate not to grow up in the church, but when she became a Christian in high school, she—in her own words—“quickly became the quintessential insufferable Christian teenager.”
Grace was a zealous believer for years, and it wasn’t until she had her first child that the questions began coming. At first, she didn’t think she was deconstructing her faith; she saw it as spiritual growth.
But then—as with many other guests—“the Pandemic hit.” While in lockdown, more than theological questions came up for Grace. With her husband’s support, online friends, and medication, Grace managed, but one thing was missing.
What she needed but couldn’t find, she created. hyssopandlaurel.com is a “grassroots arts and literary magazine for religious deconstructionists.” It is a thriving community of creative minds coming together to make art and poetry, sharing their stories because their stories matter.
Links
Website
https://hyssopandlaurel.com/
Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/hyssopandlaurel/
Link Tree
https://linktr.ee/hyssopandlaurel
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/04/02/grace-hyssop-laurel/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest bares his whole heart. “My story—at the moment—doesn’t end really well, but there’s hope for the future.”
This week’s guest is Matt. Matt grew up in a Methodist family and after partying through high school, Matt chose to attend a Christian college and became serious about his faith.
As an adult, Matt did everything he could to be all things to all people—a good husband, a good leader, a father, a friend, a mentor… He tried for years, but superhuman expectations are put on Christian men. He couldn’t do it all. No one can.
Matt tells his story with vulnerability and a whole lot of grace for others. He bore heavy burdens for a long time: Cognitive dissonance, covert narcissism (in himself and others), codependency and spiritual abuse. Yet his story reveals his great optimism for the future.
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/03/26/matt-deconversion-anonymous/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is David Hayward, also known as The Naked Pastor. David is “a pastor turned artist painting, drawing, and thinking about what it takes to be free to be you.”
For over a decade, David has been creating online spaces for anyone “interested in deconstruction, spiritual journeying, freedom of thought, or looking for your authentic self.” His personal story and the wisdom he’s gained over the years continues to speak to those of us who have completely left religion and those who still believe.
For more information, be sure to check out David’s website and follow him online!
Links
Website
https://nakedpastor.com/
Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/nakedpastor/
David’s Books
https://amzn.to/3lm9oSr
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/03/19/david-hayward-naked-pastor/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
X-Shaped Hole In Your Heart
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/02/08/the-x-shaped-hole-in-your-heart/
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week we are celebrating the fourth anniversary of the Graceful Atheist Podcast!
In this episode, you’ll meet everyone who works alongside David on the podcast, the website or the online community. Joining David are Arline, Mike T, Jimmy, Colin and Daniel.
They discuss some of their favorite movies, shows and books highlighting deconversion or secular grace. It’s a great conversation that you won’t want to miss!
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/03/12/four-years-of-the-graceful-atheist-podcast/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Jennifer Michael Hecht, bestselling author of Doubt: a History plus many other works. Her latest book, The Wonder Paradox: Embracing the Weirdness of Existence and the Poetry of Our Lives comes out this week!
Jennifer is a poet and historian and in this interview, she makes a solid case for the important place that poetry—and other art forms—can have in our lives. “It’s got to be a poet who says, ‘This virtue still matters,’ because we’re at a moment where we don’t even know what to do with things that are not fairy tales but also not physics.”
This is a great conversation that you won’t want to miss!
Links
The Wonder Paradox: Embracing the Weirdness of Existence and the Poetry of Our Lives
https://amzn.to/3SPAfCw
Website
http://www.jennifermichaelhecht.com/
Previous appearance on the podcast
https://gracefulatheist.com/2019/05/16/jennifer-michael-hecht-doubt-a-history/
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/03/05/jennifer-michael-hecht-the-wonder-paradox/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Stacie, the creative mind behind the @apostacie on Instagram and the co-host of @skeptichaven on Youtube.
Stacie grew up in charismatic churches, believing what she learned about and experienced at church was normal—from speaking in tongues to full-on demonic oppression. It wasn’t until Stacie was an adult that she began to seriously question her upbringing. After watching a Reformed-Christian documentary about the Charismatic church, the questions started coming.
“I made the promise to myself: If I had questions, I was going to find the answers to them.”
Now, she uses her online platforms to reach both atheists and doubting religious folks. Her compassionate wisdom is helping many of people.
Links
Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/apostacie/
Skeptic Haven
https://www.youtube.com/c/SkepticHaven
Interact
For quotes, recommendations, transcripts and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/02/26/stacie-apostacie/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Anne. Anne grew up in an English family whose Christian history goes back generations. As a young child, Anne and her twin took their beliefs seriously, even the damaging ones.
Her parents’ divorce shook her up. Her family had been “that Christian family,” and it felt like her parents had become strangers. Still, she clung to her faith throughout her teens and twenties.
Anne married young, meeting an American missionary while in Scotland, but it seemed her partner wasn’t as devout as she’d hoped. His was on his own journey through deconstruction but she didn’t want to see it.
In her thirties, Anne began to acknowledge the questions and psychological distress she’d had for years. “It’s almost like this pressure had been building and building and building and finally it broke through, and I just thought, What if it’s not real? I had not allowed myself to ask that question.”
It took a little googling, excellent therapy and other people’s deconstruction stories for Anne to see that she no longer believed. It’s been freeing for her to see the world as it really is. No more “magical thinking.”
She and her partner are asking whole new questions, and it’s growing them and changing them in ways they never could have imagined.
Interact
For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/02/19/anne-so-i-persisted/
You are not broken, you are human
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/12/06/you-are-not-broken-you-are-human/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Audrey. Audrey spent her childhood and adolescence deep in American Christianity.
In college, she took a course in “biblical perspectives,” and she had many questions. She would shelve the cognitive dissonance for years, though, pretending that everything was fine.
After years of experiencing church from the inside and working around more “secular” people, the uncertainty could no longer stay buried. “Something just wasn’t right.”
Audrey is an atheist now, but deconversion is fresh. The past guilt and shame still come up at times. She’s reconnecting with her body and mind, though, and loving the woman she is—the woman she’s always been.
“It’s so incredible how once I stepped away from christianity, how I was able to gain a better understanding of how to actually take care of myself.”
“All I wanted to do was be a Woman of God. I had my future planned out: I was going to find a husband at college, be the perfect godly woman, and he was going to be the man that was going to lead me in Christ.”
Interact
For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/02/12/audrey-deconversion-of-an-american-christian/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Taylor. Taylor grew up in a small church in a small town, surrounded by Christianity. She had family devotions at home and a private-Christian-academy curricula at school.
By twenty-one, however, she moved out and stopped attending church completely. Her “personal relationship with Jesus” was more important than church-going.
While watching a loved one live with cancer and then face death, Taylor’s faith gave her hope and meaning, until it couldn’t. Depressive episodes came for a while and Taylor knew she needed to get mentally healthy.
Once her head was “out of the fog,” and she began reading the Bible again, she was shocked at what she read. It had been there all along, but now she could see. “[People said,] ‘Well you just need to dig deeper in the Bible.’ It had the complete opposite effect.”
Now Taylor has let go of many childhood beliefs. She doesn’t have all the answers. but she has peace—a peace that hasn’t come from supernatural help but from doing her own inner work. She is her own savior, no one else.
Links
Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/skeptical_heretic/
Interact
For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/02/05/taylor-yoder-in-the-trenches-of-deconstruction-and-deconversion/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Enjoy the rest of Arline and Bryan, the Ex-Apologist, in this bonus episode. Bryan goes into more detail around apologetics and counter-apologetics.
Links
The Ex-Apologist blog
https://theexapologist.com/
Email
TheFormerChristianApologist@gmail.com
Interact
For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/01/29/bryan-ex-apologist/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week Arline guest hosts interviewing Bryan the Ex-Apologist. Bryan grew up in a deeply fundamentalist church. Not only did they believe they were the True Church, they were taught they they were the Only Church.
Bryan spent his teen and young adult years preaching, evangelizing and heatedly debating others. He was convinced he had all the right answers and other people needed those right answers. He sees his younger self as a “jerk for Jesus.”
Realizing he was wrong about a single theological issue, he began to wonder, How do I know what’s essential and what’s not? If there was absolute truth in the world, Bryan was determined to find it. He has come a long way from the fundamentalism of his youth, and you can find his current counter-apologetics research and writing at The Ex-Apologist blog.
Links
The Ex-Apologist blog
https://theexapologist.com/
Email
TheFormerChristianApologist@gmail.com
Interact
For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/01/29/bryan-ex-apologist/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Rachel Hunt. Rachel is both the Support Group Director and an Ambassador for Recovering From Religion.
From her RFR bio, “Rachel is a motorcycle-riding ballroom dance teacher from rural Texas. Married with two adult children, Rachel has a strong interest in psychology, philosophy, and communication, in addition to the creative arts and home improvement. She was raised in Christian Science but drifted off as a teenager. She explored Scientology, Law of Attraction, and a variety of Protestant churches before settling comfortably into atheism.”
Rachel shares her personal story and how Recovering from Religion is serving people all over the world.
Links
24/7 RfR hotline: 84-I-Doubt-It (844-368-2848 )
https://www.recoveringfromreligion.org/#rfr-welcome
Recovering From Relgion
https://www.recoveringfromreligion.org/
Secular Therapy Project
https://www.seculartherapy.org/
Interact
For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/01/22/rachel-hunt-recovering-from-religion/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guests are Brian and Troy of the podcast, I was a Teenage Fundamentalist. They interviewed David at the end of 2022, and now it’s our turn to hear from them.
Brian and Troy “used to be loyal Christians megachurch leaders. They’re not anymore.” Their parallel stories are fascinating, as we are given a glimpse into their past lives and the Pentecostal movement in Australia.
Today, Brian and Troy’s “honest and often hilarious podcast peeks behind the curtain at the weird, the worrying and the sometimes traumatic world of Evangelicals and Pentecostals.” This is a great episode that you won’t want to miss!
Links
Website
https://www.iwasateenagefundamentalist.com/
I Was A Teenage Fundamentalist podcast
https://pod.link/1558606464
Twitter
https://twitter.com/WasTeenage
Facebook
https://www.facebook.com/TeenageFundamentalist
Facebook Group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/3188989997871128
Link Tree
https://linktr.ee/iwatf
YouTube
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCs0jrFsxPsg7rGNfgqzAGug
IWATF interviews David from the Graceful Atheist Podcast
https://pod.link/1558606464/episode/f8067a71cf74f38205420663954fceaf
Interact
For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/01/15/troy-and-brian-iwatf/
Attribution
“Waves” track written and produced by Makaih Beats
This week’s guest is Evan Clark. Evan is the Executive Director of Atheists United. Evan grew up in a partially religious home, but at six years old, the idea of a god didn’t make sense to him.
He attended a Christian liberal arts college and was able to start its first atheist group. Since then, he’s gone on to create many humanist communities.
In this episode, Evan explains why atheist spaces in the US differ from spaces in other more progressive countries, why community is not the only thing people need, and he shares some of Atheists United’s upcoming projects.
Links
Atheists United
https://www.atheistsunited.org/
Atheists United Studios Podcast Network
https://www.atheistsunited.org/au-studios
Interact
For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2023/01/08/evan-clark-atheists-united/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Arline guest hosts to ask David anything. David tells his deconversion story. He talks about the beginning of the Deconversion Anonymous FB group. David goes deep on what Secular Grace is and what it means to him.
LinksDeconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Why I am a Humanist
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/11/18/why-i-am-a-humanist/
InteractFor quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/12/18/ask-me-anything-2022/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Support the podcast onPatreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Attribution"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
AMA? Try AAA. Ask Arline Anything. This week’s guest is your community manager, Arline. Arline tells us what she has learned from managing the community and interviewing guests. She explains how her views have changed on Christianity and fundamentalism after deconversion. She let’s us know what makes her mad and what gives her hope. She reveals her love language(s).
Join me in thanking Arline for all the work she does for the community and the podcast. Let her know she is appreciated.
InteractFor quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/12/11/ask-arline-anything-2022/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Support the podcast onPatreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Content Warning: Spiritual, physical and sexual abuse. Depression, post-partum depression, infertility and suicidal idealization.
Arline guest hosts interviewing author and podcaster, Nicki Pappas. Nicki Pappas is a writer who critiques the evangelical establishment that shaped her. She’s the author of As Familiar as Family: Leaving the Toxic Religion I Was Groomed For. She’s also the host of the Broadening the Narrative podcast where she interviews guests who are broadening the narratives she was taught within white evangelicalism. She has three young children with Stephen Pappas, her steady partner in the chaos since 2010. Through her work, she desires to spark hope in the world around her and live out an embodied faith.
LinksWebsite
https://www.nickipappas.com/
Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/broadeningthenarrative/
Broadening the Narrative Podcast
http://broadeningthenarrative.blogspot.com/
AmazonPaidLinks
As Familiar as Family: Leaving the Toxic Religion I Was Groomed For
https://amzn.to/3FlMRez
InteractFor quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/12/04/nicki-pappas-as-familiar-as-family/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Support the podcast onPatreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Jessica Moore, a life coach focusing on purity culture. Jessica grew up in a non-denominational Christian in Salt Lake City Utah surrounded by Mormons. She felt both the pressure to evangelize and be proselytized.
Jessica went to an unaccredited Christian college where she first began to have doubts. She wound up traveling to Israel and seeing life on both sides of the Palestinian/Israeli border. She experienced the reverse culture shock coming back to the United States.
Jessica put a lot of pressure on herself to be a “godly woman.” Purity culture had a damaging impact on her life.
The focus of her work now is helping people recover from purity culture and religious abuse.
LinksWebsite
https://jessicamoorecoaching.com/
Series of Expansion blog
https://jessicamoorecoaching.com/blog
Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/becomingyou.coaching/
InteractMy appearance on the I Was A Teenage Fundamentalist podcast
https://pod.link/1558606464/episode/f8067a71cf74f38205420663954fceaf
For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/11/27/jessica-moore-becoming-you/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Support the podcast on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Ben and Ang have been married for seventeen years. They met as tender homeschooled church-kids. They married young, and the church’s “formula” worked well for a while.
They were mostly happy and went on to have kids of their own. But little things from childhood would pop up now and then—purity culture shame, fear of emotions, fear of the end of the world…
In June of 2016, the shooting at Pulse nightclub “broke” Ang, and she knew she had to find a different way forward. By 2017, they both were out of church—Ben trying to save their marriage; Ang trying to save herself.
Now, Ben and Ang are navigating a new and more intimate life together. They’re both agnostic, defining agnosticism a little differently from one another, but they both agree—this life is most important, and it must be lived to the fullest!
Links Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/buildanadventure/
Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/11/20/arline-interviews-ben-and-ang/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guests are podcasters, Nathan Alexander and Todd Tavares of Beyond Atheism.
Nathan grew up Anglican and in his early twenties, he realized there were no good reasons to continue believing. Todd grew up Catholic—technically still confirmed—but even at ten years old, he was a skeptic, wanting to explore reality rather than make-believe.
In this interview, Nathan and Todd discuss racism, humanism, community-building and what it means to live thoughtfully in a godless world. It’s a sharp conversion you don’t want to miss!
Links Beyond Atheism
https://www.nathangalexander.com/podcast
Race in a Godless World: Atheism, Race, and Civilization, 1850-1914
https://www.nathangalexander.com/book-race-in-a-godless-world
AmazonPaidLinks
https://amzn.to/3hGdEtO
Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/11/13/nathan-and-todd-beyond-atheism/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Heather Wells, author of Trustworthy: A Journey from American Christianity to Freedom. Heather grew up in a happy Christian home, attending a variety of churches—from “Women cannot wear pants,” to “There are drums!”
She married at eighteen and expected to have a similarly happy marriage as her parents, but no matter how hard she worked—both literally and metaphorically—that was not going to happen. Heather felt like a spectator, watching the men around her plan her life.
It looks years of a one-sided marriage, churches refusing to help and zero answered prayers for Heather to realize she had to be her own savior. Once she had a well-paying job and more education, she no longer needed others to rescue her and her family.
Heather now enjoys a life that is her own and no one else’s. She is the trustworthy one. She can look to herself—her own intuition, her own knowledge and education—for what is best for her. That is a sweet gift that no one can take from her.
AmazonPaidLinks
Trustworthy: A Journey from American Christianity to Freedom
https://amzn.to/3heAKHA
Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/11/06/heather-wells-trustworthy/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Humanist author and speaker, Joe Simonetta, grew up in a Catholic home with good values. He and his brothers “did well,” and he is thankful for the foundation his parents gave him. As a young man, affected by all the suffering in the world, he vowed to be part of the solution. He has lived a fascinating life, holding degrees from multiple universities, traveling extensively and enjoying all kinds of professions. His full bio is available here.
Joe is hopeful about the future and has three basic rules that he believes can change the future for humanity: Be healthy. Be kind. Respect the environment.
Links Website and books
https://joesimonetta.com/
Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/10/30/joe-simonetta-seven-words/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is the content creator, @boundless_and_free. Boundless grew up in a good Christian home, attended a PCA church and believed all was well in her life. She would later learn the term CPTSD and understand that a “good Christian upbringing” may not have been quite what she’d thought.
In college, Ms. Free first experienced anxiety and depression but had no vocabulary for it. The Church rarely discusses these things. It wasn’t until the “perfect life” she’d been promised began to unravel that she realized she needed a different way to understand “god” and herself .
Now, as a “parts work” therapist, she helps others on their own journeys. Her personal experience of the divine centers around the ways that humans are connected to one another and the universe.
Once again—whether someone leaves religion and becomes an atheist or continues on a spiritual journey—the real purpose in life comes from connecting with other people. We are all in this together, and we each get one life to leave this world better than we found it.
Links Counseling Website
http://theempoweredselfcounseling.com/
Boundless and Free on Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/boundless_and_free/
Religious Trauma Institute
https://www.religioustraumainstitute.com/
Secular Therapy Project
https://www.seculartherapy.org/
You are not broken, you are human
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/12/06/you-are-not-broken-you-are-human/
Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/10/23/arline-interviews-boundless-and-free/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Keke. Keke grew up a PK. Her family was in church, “running the show,” anytime the doors were open. Life at home was difficult for Keke, however, so the church provided a safe haven. But over time, domestic violence, mental health problems and other family secrets were too great a burden for her to carry.
After high school, she joined the military, got married and even led her husband to Jesus. Then in 2017, as she was reading a most peculiar bible story to her daughter, she started on a deconstruction journey that she never saw coming.
Keke now is learning everything she can about ancient mythologies, African American history and many other cultures. She’s also raising her children to be open to the world and its many cultures. She knows that human connection is truly what we need—whether with our ancestors through stories or with those around us today.
Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/10/16/keke-deconversion-of-a-pk/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Daniel. Daniel is a social scientist with a master’s degree in psychology. He grew up in the United Church of Canada, but church wasn’t a huge part of his life until high school. He then went to bible college and worked in ministry. He tried to experience God like others were, but it just wouldn’t happen.
He took on the “Office of Skeptic,” for himself. He hoped it would both help his faith and the church. He could articulate questions and doubts that others couldn’t. Were these miraculous stories true? Was God really even there? If so, what the hell was he doing?
Unfortunately, this only kept him in the church longer than he needed. By 2020, he’d been an agnostic theist for years and was finally seeing the harm done in North America by White Christianity.
Now Daniel writes and speaks, sharing his knowledge with those struggling with addictions and other mental health needs. He no longer looks to the supernatural for miracles but knows how much human connection is the true healer.
Links Here’s How Religion Imprints Us — Even When We Walk Away
https://www.templeton.org/news/heres-how-religion-imprints-us-even-when-we-walk-away
Religious Identity and Morality: Evidence for Religious Residue and Decay in Moral Foundations
https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/0146167220970814
Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/10/09/daniel-office-of-the-skeptic/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s guest is Treasure who is interviewed by Arline, the Deconversion Anonymous community manager. Treasure grew up in the Seventh Day Adventist tradition. Her whole family was focused on ministry. Treasure is a singer and she was continually asked to sing for every church she attended. She was focused on mental health issues and ministering to people in need.
In 2020, Treasure began to quietly question her faith and began the slow painful process of deconstruction. Though she still loves hymns, even music, once a joy, has become “confusing” due to the obligation to perform for churches and feels like a “job”.
Treasure has found spiritual and community fulfillment in her current spiritual practices of meditation, intentional journaling and yoga including sound bowl healing. She is also a participant in the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group where she says it is safe to vent.
Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/10/02/arline-interviews-treasure/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
Content Warning: miscarriage; traumatic birth; mental health problems; hell anxiety
This week’s guest is Julia. Julia is the clever mind behind @painfulpostchristianprayers on Instagram.
Julia grew up in a German mostly-atheist environment. The hostility, however, she saw for religion made it all the morning appealing. As she came of age, she found herself confirmed in the German Lutheran church but attending and loving a very American Baptist church. Julia was all-in but soon found some doctrines were a bit much, especially the teachings about Hell.
For years, Julia threw herself into American Church World—she read the entire Bible, went to university to become a missionary doctor, met her spouse at church, even read Joshua Harris’s books! But life has a way of forcing some to wonder if the God they believe in really is as kind as they’ve been told.
After one incredibly trying event after another, Julia could no longer see God’s “goodness.” She began to see through the “incredibly ridiculous explanations” people gave when God did not come through.
Julia is in a very different place now, and her online presence provides an outlet for the anger that had been pent-up for so long. It has also brought her community. She is far from alone, thousands are waking up to the lies and empty promises of Christianity.
And that is what is what humans truly need—not a distant pretend deity but real human connection and relationship.
Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/09/25/julia-deconstruction-of-a-doctor/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
Stay skeptical? This week’s guest is Thom Krystofiak. He’s the author of Tempted to Believe: The Seductive Power of Claims About “The Truth.”
Thom grew up Catholic but as an adult began practicing TM, Transcendental Meditation. He followed gurus and groups for decades, even though he was never quite convinced of the more spectacular claims of TM.
Thom shares about his experiences in the TM movement and what pushed him out. He also discusses important questions people, regardless of their belief or skepticism, could ask themselves: What do I mean by truth? How do I find the truth? And how much does truth really matter?
Links Tempted to Believe: The Seductive Power of Claims about "The Truth"
https://amzn.to/3qKAa63
Thom’s personal site
https://krystofiak.com/
Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/09/18/thom-rystofiak-tempted-to-belive/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s guest is Doug. Doug became interested in church when he was in junior high, and when Doug is in, he’s all in.
He was a believer throughout high school, college and into the military. But then books and magazines happened. Doug began reading more “skeptical literature,” and the questions began.
Doug’s faith unraveled while he was “an atheist in a foxhole,” but faith in the supernatural was unnecessary. He needed his own strength, and the strength of the people around him.
He has since been an atheist pastor, finding the human connection he and his wife needed, without changing their beliefs or forsaking their values. As Brene Brown says, “We are hardwired to connect with others,” and Christianity has no longer cornered the marked on community and belonging.
Links Unitarian Universalist Church of Tullahoma
https://tullahomauu.org/index.html
Doug’s Short story “The Faith I Left Behind” is in the book, The Sandbox: Dispatches from Troops in Iraq and Afghanistan
https://amzn.to/3RYrHaZ
Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/09/11/doug-traversa-atheist-minister/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s guest is Cooper. Cooper grew up deeply immersed in church world. From the time she was a little girl, she was devoted to God and obedient to her family. In high school, life threw her a curve ball, but she continued faithfully loving Jesus and doing what she believed to be best.
Parenthood, marriage, church life and military life all, in different ways, knocked her feet out from beneath her. Every year it seemed like something was more difficult, more uncertain and the church wasn’t always stepping up with the support she needed.
After years of questions without satisfying answers, Cooper finds herself a woman—more than a wife and mom—with options and freedom to choose her own life. She may not have the answers to every question, but she’s okay with that. She and her children keep moving forward, empowered now to love one another without sacrificing themselves.
Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/09/04/cooper-deconstruction-of-a-mother/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s guest is Jack Robertson. Jack is a returning guest and an integral part of the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group. Earlier this year, Jack’s youngest daughter, Emily, was in an accident, suffering severe burns on her body.
Jack discusses how his online community and IRL friends stepped in to support his family. He also discusses the anger and hurt their family experience at the platitudes and cliches of the Christians in their lives.
Emily’s clearheadedness, dark sense of humor and incredible resilience has brought her a long way in the healing process—mentally, physically and emotionally. Jack and the rest of their family are also healing in their own ways, supporting one another and seeking professional help.
We are Human. We are social beings whose needs are not met by “a guy in the sky.” Our needs are met through our relationships with one another, especially those who are closest to us.
Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/08/28/jack-emilys-story/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
Content Warning: This week’s story includes references to physical and emotional abuse, mental illness and suicidal ideation. Listener discretion is advised.
This week’s guest is Jan. Jan grew up in a strict fundamentalist household which made church safer, and that disconnect planted the first seeds of doubt.
She went off to a Christian university where she was told to expect “signs and wonders”, but they didn’t happen. Becoming a missionary wife was supposed to satisfy her “need to serve God” but it didn’t happen. Again and again, as she pursued God, she was let down.
Trauma, depression and unfulfilled promises slowly broke her, and even then, God didn’t show up. She had been doing it all on her own, and it would take a divorce and leaving the Church completely, for her to see that.
After finding care and support in therapy and “spiritual but not religious” communities, Jan now supports others struggling with mental illness. She is living a life filled with grace both for herself and others.
Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/08/21/jan-mental-health-and-deconstruction/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s guest is Matthew. Matthew grew up in the Pentacostal tradition and went from being a youth leader in high school to a full-time international missionary as an adult. He had all the right answers to all the important questions.
The missionary life, however, didn’t turn out as he’d expected. He and his team did everything in their power to tell people about Jesus but nothing supernatural was happening. Year after year, “the hiddenness of God” became too much for Matthew.
It hasn’t been easy for Matthew to get where he is now—living a freer life, not having to have all the answers, not having to wait for the supernatural to happen. He loves people closest to him, enjoys his friends and acquaintances without judgment, and those small things are what slowly change the world.
Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/08/14/matt-deconversion-of-a-missionary/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s guest is Drew. Drew grew up as a Missionary Kid and has traveled to nearly every continent and all across the United States. Drew spent years of his life evangelizing and serving others through construction, farming and carpentry.
Drew has since left mainstream evangelicalism, with its exclusivity and supremacy culture, but he is using the tools he developed. He and his family serve their local community right in the Bible Belt with a market, concerts, a community center and so much more!
Humans don’t need a supernatural being to come to our rescue. We need one another. We need each other’s abilities and companionship. Drew and his family are changing the future by building intentional community right where they are.
Links NOTE: Not an endorsement
The Perch
https://www.theperchcomer.com/
Rupert Spira Podcast Episode 47: The Weekend University
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/rupert-spira-podcast/id1494564673?i=1000571203239
Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/08/07/drew-community-and-consciousness/
Graceful Atheist YouTube Channel
https://www.youtube.com/c/GracefulAtheist
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s guest is Adria. Adria is a sociologist working in international development. Adria grew up in various multiethnic churches but each one seemed to worship whiteness alongside Jesus. By the end of college, Adria was done with church. Years later, in atheist spaces, she would find racism to be just as prevalent.
Her experience with the Christian missionaries showed her the inequity that must exist for missionary work to thrive. In the last decade she has since seen that Western nations continue missionary work; only as evangelists for “neoliberal economic systems” rather than the gospel.
Adria’s understanding of supremacy culture’s effects on humanity is invaluable to any community—church, atheist or global—working toward a more equitable world. She truly is a model of graceful atheism.
We discuss international development, missionary work, economics, equity, racism, atheism, black non-believers and much more.
Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/07/31/adria-racism-in-the-missionary-field/
Catch me on former guest, Robert People’s, Affinis Humanity, Instagram live Thursday August 4th at 5 PM EDT
https://www.instagram.com/affinishumanity/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Photo By James Barry
http://www.treaty2u.govt.nz/images/impact-main-1.jpg, Public Domain, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=12666818
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s guest is Jenny McGrath. Jenny is a licensed mental health counselor, a somatic psychotherapist, and a movement educator specializing in religious trauma and sexual abuse. She believes “in the power of story and the wisdom of the body.”
Jenny’s work stems partly from her evangelical upbringing in Colorado Springs. She was steeped in the world of purity culture. Her work also comes from a broad understanding of the history of purity culture—women’s disembodiment, trauma, gender erasure, systemic racism and more.
Jenny guides and support others in their journeys to liberation and hope after years of harm and trauma. She is truly living out secular grace!
Links Counseling website
https://www.indwellcounseling.com/
Embodied Sexuality Course
https://www.indwellmovement.com/embodied-sexuality
Purity Culture Research Collective
https://puritycultureresearchcollective.com/
Recommendations Podcasts Straight White American Jesus podcast
https://straightwhiteamericanjesus.com/
Books
AmzonPaidLinks
*The Purity Myth by Jessica Valenti
https://amzn.to/3aWcvvf*
*Virgin Nation by Sara Moslener
https://amzn.to/3zuiqB9*
*Shameless by Nadia Bolz Weber (progressive Christian perspective)
https://amzn.to/3RPCmW2*
Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/07/24/jenny-mcgrath-embodied-sexuality/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s guest is B. B grew up homeschooled in a large evangelical household and spent nearly thirty years in the church, trying to fit in. He had felt like leaving for a while, never having belonged, and then in 2016, he knew it was the end for him. He hit the door running.
One of the most destructive forces within his Christian upbringing was Purity Culture. Since deconverting, he’s learned that he isn’t alone when it comes to loving yourself and exerting your autonomy.
Links Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/happyinmyownskin/
Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/07/17/arline-interviews-b/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s guest is Bob Barnes. Bob is an organizer with BAHA, Bluewater Atheists, Humanists & Agnostics. BAHA “is a non-profit organization dedicated to improving the image of Freethinkers and Atheists and to give back to our communities.”
BAHA is hosting its annual conference, BAHACon, this year with speakers and events you won’t want to miss! August 26 – 28th, 2022 in Sarnia, Ontario, Canada.
Links BAHACon
https://bahacon.com
Bluewater Atheists, Humanists and Agnostics
https://bluewateraha.com/
Promo Video
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hbXUm4C_JDc
Interact For quotes, recommendation and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/07/10/bob-barnes-bahacon-2022/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
After years in the mission field and in pastoral ministry Paul is done. Paul is Deb's (last week's guest) husband.
Deb's episode
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/06/26/deb-is-done/
Interact For quotes, recommendation and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/07/03/pual-is-done/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s guest is Deb. Deb “asked Jesus into her heart” at six years old and remained a devoted follower of Jesus for decades. She married her high school sweetheart, started a family and found herself living the missionary life on the continent of Africa.
As the years passed, Deb’s faith was tested—praying and watching children die on two continents, her husband pointlessly fired from their church, meeting different types of Christians and the reading of diverse books. Deb had more and more questions about her lifelong faith.
Today, Deb’s spirituality is one that stays curious and open to new thing, no longer holding tightly to any one creed. Her story is a beautiful one filled with compassion and love and a desire to meet people wherever they are. She is truly living out secular grace.
Interact For quotes, recommendation and more see the full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/06/26/deb-is-done/ Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s guest is Ruby. Ruby is an author, blogger and YouTuber, living her journey out loud for the benefit of her followers. Lutheran to her core, Ruby spent her life committed to the institution of the Church. It took multiple heartbreaks and difficulties in life before she began to wonder, “Is any of this true? Is any of this real?”
She threw out the formal church experience first. Then, through her impressive consumption of non-fiction books, she was able to be rid of the Bible and finally Jesus.
Now, Ruby’s life is all about love and kindness toward her fellow human beings. As far as supernatural beliefs, she looks to “the flow,” of the Universe. She’s able to define god in her own terms and her life—and the lives around her—are better for it.
Links Poetry
https://thepreciouspoet.blogspot.com/
What do I believe?
https://thepreciouspoet.blogspot.com/p/what-do-i-believe-may-7-2022.html
Book blog and recommendations
https://rubygetsreal.blogspot.com/
Atheistic Lent
https://authenticlent.blogspot.com/
Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/06/19/ruby-gets-real/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Post on satisfaction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/01/19/i-still-havent-found-what-im-looking-for/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
Community manager, Arline, guest hosts. This week’s guests are a couple of fabulous black women who’ve come a long way in their journeys away from white evangelicalism. They’ve known one another for over a decade and their conversation is both information and so much fun.
Marissa grew up in church and loved it as a kid. As a college student, however, she found herself in a ministry that was a little bit “culty.” And then as an adult she watched all the white friends she’d served alongside fall for a new savior, Donald Trump.
Raven grew up in a “culturally Christian” home but dove head-first into campus ministry in college. By 2012, when George Zimmerman murdered Trayvon Martin, she began to see whiteness, not Jesus, as the true god of people she’d known for years.
Marissa and Raven are currently in different spiritual places but neither can go back to the Christianity they knew as young adults. Their lives are freer and fuller than they’ve ever been before, and they see that it is good.
Interact
Full episode show notes including quotes and recommendations
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/06/12/arline-marissa-and-raven/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
Our guest this week is Dave. Dave grew up in the Mennonite Brethren faith and followed all the rules until at age 50, a gift from his son made him begin to ask questions. Dave’s love for his family and a desire for truth are equally apparent in his story. He asked hard questions and was never given satisfying answers. Knowing he had to tell his wife about his waning faith, Dave feared the consequences. Fortunately, Dave and his family have chosen to turn toward one another in love. It has been a trying journey for Dave, but he knows that pursuing truth and loving the people around you give life purpose.
Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/06/05/dave-gossen-agnostic-and-done/
Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s show is a Deconversion Anonymous episode.
This week’s guest is Elizabeth. Elizabeth grew up in what she calls a “Methodist Baptist” church, mostly Methodist but with more conservatism and even some charisma thrown in.
Elizabeth loved church as a kid, but as a teen, things were harder: purity culture demands, a youth pastor leaving abruptly and even a camp with exorcisms. Looking back, Elizabeth sees a theme: The parents did little to help the kids feel and be safe.
After graduation, Elizabeth went to a Baptist college where she met (again!) and married her now-husband. When adversity hit, trying to expand their family, they saw their Christian friends’ true colors.
Throughout a difficult pregnancy, crying out to God, Elizabeth thought, No one is listening and no one is coming to save me. She continued hoping, though, only to be let down again and again. Church people will not support you and no god is coming to save you.
Elizabeth sees that it was here. She was the strong and resilient one all along. She bore the load, the emotional, physical and mental weight. No one—neither supernatural or human—showed up to help.
Now, on the other side of faith, Elizabeth has her immediate family and a strong community of friends, diverse people walking alongside her. She no longer looks to the sky for help, but knows she has all she needs inside her and right around her.
Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/05/29/elizabeth-deconversion-anonymous/
Review: Hell is the absence of God
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/06/04/review-hell-is-the-absence-of-god/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s show is a Deconversion Anonymous episode.
This week’s guest is Shannon. Shannon’ story delves into the emotional experience of deconversion. Shannon grew up in an Independent Fundamental Baptist church, where the teachings were pernicious.
As a teen and into adulthood, Shannon knew her own beliefs and convictions did not always align with her church or family. She tried to be who they wanted her to be, but her decisions were never quite enough for them.
Over the years, she slowly, like “mental velcro,” ripped out the only beliefs she had known. Where her family couldn’t hold space for her questions, her husband could. It was a hard journey, but she wasn’t on it alone.
Today, Shannon misses the certainty she used to have, the path laid out in front of her with easy answers. But she is able to see the world with new eyes—the glory and majesty of nature, the wonders of scientific inquiry. It has changed her for the better, and she isn’t looking back.
Recommendations Thought Experiments For Believers
https://gracefulatheist.com/2018/12/03/thought-experiments-for-believers/
Deconversion How To
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Review of Hell is the Absence of God
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/06/04/review-hell-is-the-absence-of-god/
After Life trailer
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eIGGKSHMQOM
The Invention of Lying trailer
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RhRnmyBjOLs
Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/05/22/shannon-deconversion-anonymous/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s show is a Deconversion Anonymous episode.
This week’s guest is Seth. Seth was the oldest child in a large homeschooling family who attended attended mostly non-denominational churches. He was always studious and had read through the Bible multiple times before adulthood.
In high school, Seth made his faith his own and dove deeply into Youth Earth Creationism. He studied at a state university and a few years after graduation began work at The Creation Museum.
While living near the museum, Seth was introduced to a fringe religious movement he describes as “Messianic Judaism meets evangelicalism meets conspiracy theories.” In the Hebrew Roots movement, Seth discovered teachings he’d not encountered before and some doubts began to creep in.
Over the next year, Seth continued to experience conflicts between YEC and Hebrew Roots. The two ways of thinking were at odds—flat earth or round, scientific cosmology or the broken body of a leviathan?
By 2020, Seth realized he was an atheist, no longer able to convince himself to believe again.
Recommendations Books * Sapiens by Yuval Noah Harari
Youtube
* Paulogia
* Viced Rhino
* Godless Engineer
* AcapellaScience
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ydqReeTV_vk
Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/05/15/seth-deconversion-anonymous/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s show is a Deconversion Anonymous episode.
This week’s guest is Anne. Anne grew up in a loving and happy Christian home in a large city where her father pastored a small reformed church.
As a teen, her faith was very real to her, and a few years later, she attended a Christian college, but struggled mentally and physically.
Anne left that school and attended a Bible college, but she quickly realized she would be excluded from most ministry opportunities because of her gender.
After a short and sometimes insulting experience in children’s ministry and then a sickness that went on for man years, Anne felt like God had “benched” her, but she continued praying and hoping.
Over the next many years, Anne’s family met one obstacle after another—toxic or cult-like churches, physical and mental illnesses, Christians backing Trump and even loved ones passing away. Finally, she couldn’t take any more.
“I couldn’t hear from God…I couldn’t worship. I couldn’t hypnotize myself with the piano. I couldn’t do anything…[I was] done.”
Then during the Pandemic, Anne read a single book that made her stop and think for a moment. Then, her questions started coming and couldn’t be stopped. From the outside, it may seem like Anne’s deconversion was quick, but she had given God plenty of time to reveal himself.
Recommendations * The Lasting Supper * Deconversion Anonymous * Harmonic Atheist * MythVision * Bart Ehrman * Darkmatter2525 * Holy Koolaid
Books
AmazonPaidLinks
Jesus & John Wayne by Kristin Kobes Du Mez
https://amzn.to/388uqxl
Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/05/08/anne-deconversion-anonymous/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s guest is artist Ursula Schneider. As a child, neither her charismatic church nor her unstable home were safe for her. There was a lot of mental illness at home and Ursula often felt abandoned by the church. Their family was simply “too much.”
Ursula grew up, married young and began going to church again. As an adult, she needed something real to her. She saw that something in the women at church, so she dove right in—daily prayer, bible studies, women’s retreats, all of it.
But Ursula kept bumping up against a certain church doctrine: women cannot teach men. She was a gifted leader and teacher but church after church kept her out of the pulpit.
At the last church she attended, Ursula faced the greatest challenge yet to her faith. Over the span of a few months, she and her husband went from being well-respected leaders to losing their entire community.
Ursula went through a depressive state and cried out to God, but no answer came. Over the next few years, Ursula would make beautiful art, write for herself and continue to question her religious beliefs.
Since leaving, Ursula has dabbled in other faiths, wondering if any will fit her. Nothing has yet, but she is learning and growing as a whole person. She no longer has to squash part of herself or silence her own curiosity.
Ursula’s art and writing empower others to exist as their whole selves in the world and to see beauty and inspiration in the world around them.
Ursula Schneider art exhibition through May 25th 2022, at D&R Art Gallery and Studio in Tucson, AZ.
Links Website
https://www.ursulaschneider.art/
Personal FaceBook
https://www.facebook.com/ursula.d.schneider/
Business facebook page
https://www.facebook.com/ursulaschneiderart
https://www.instagram.com/ursula_schneider_art/
People can also email me at ursulaschneiderart@gmail.com
Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/05/01/ursula-schneider/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
CW Mental health and depression
This week’s guest is Andrew Pledger. Andrew has spent nearly his entire life in the Independent Fundamentalist Baptist Church—where the KJV rules and women do not.
Andrew was homeschooled K-12 with a mildly white Christian nationalist curriculum, no sex education and no diverse friendships.
For years, Andrew’s mental health suffered, but there were no resources for him. He was told that he wasn’t “reading the Bible enough” and “needed to get closer to God.”
In college, Andrew knew he needed professional help but at a fundamentalist Christian college, there was only “biblical counseling”. The first two years were excruciating. Eventually, however, with a little community and a lot of research, Andrew took his mental health into his own hands.
He started asking difficult questions about the Bible, and it was not long before the foundations began to crumble.
Since leaving Christianity, Andrew has lived out secular grace. He is spreading awareness about toxic religion and working toward becoming a religious trauma therapist. His personal experience of freedom compels him to help others find the same freedom.
Links Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/4ndrewpledger/
Josh Harris Interview
https://www.instagram.com/tv/Ca–9vFAxqs/?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=
Photo Series
https://www.instagram.com/4ndrewpledger/guide/religious-trauma-photo-series/17999363926411608/?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=
Website
https://4ndrewpledger.mypixieset.com
Link aggregator
https://liinks.co/4ndrewpledger
Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/04/24/andrew-pledger-religious-trauma-awareness/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s guest is Robert Peoples of Affinis Humanity. Robert grew up in a Black Baptist church in New Jersey. When he was young, he enjoyed church but was an inquisitive child with many questions and no satisfying answers. As a teenager, Robert looked for answers outside the church—from Thomas Paine to Allah to the Buddha.
By 18 years old, Robert could no longer believe in anything supernatural. His understanding of the world came from philosophy, history and science. This was incredibly difficult for his family, but they continued to faithfully love and support him.
One frustration Robert has with the Black church community is that it works to change unjust systems but then uses phrases like, “We couldn’t have done this without God.”
In recent years, Robert has been working with a political non-profit to ensure the “separation of state and church” and to change unjust policies. Human suffering is caused less by individuals “in need of heart change,” and more by systemic racism, homophobia, classism and other inequities.
[Humanism] has increased my love for humanity exponentially.
I no longer love people with conditions.
In the midst of all the work to be done, Robert is hopeful. He is effecting change in the world and reminding others that “being human is enough.” He stands in awe of the beauty of nature, his daughters and this short life. His story is one of world-changing secular grace.
Links Affinis Humanity
https://www.affinishumanity.org/
Secular Coalition for Arizona
https://secularaz.org/
Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/04/10/robert-peoples-affinis-humanity/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s guest is Luke J. Janssen, M.Sc., Ph.D., M.T.S., Professor Emeritus, Dept. Medicine, McMaster University, and co-host of the Recovering Evangelicals podcast. He is a scientist in medical research. During a faith crisis he began taking courses on theology which turned into an M.T.S degree.
Luke tells his story in four 15 year phases: his early years as a nominal Reformed Christian, his young adulthood as a Pentecostal/Charismatic fundamentalist, a desconstruction phase, and where he is now, with a “small part of him that won’t let go” and a belief in a creative force.
Luke and his co-host, Boyd Blundell, cover many aspects of desconstruction on the Recovering Evangelicals podcast. They discuss various apologetic and scientific arguments and honestly reveal what they do an do not believe now and why.
Links Website
https://lukejjanssen.wordpress.com/
Recovering Evangelicals
https://lukejjanssen.wordpress.com/recovering-evangelicals/
Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/04/03/luke-janssen-recovering-evangelicals/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s Deconversion Anonymous guest is Bethany. Bethany grew up in the Pacific Northwest, attending an Assemblies of God church. It was an insular experience of their brand of Christianity against the world.
The older Bethany got, the scarier the church doctrines—eternal torment, losing one’s salvation, the Apocalypse, faith healing that doesn’t always work and even demons under her bed.
Bethany was a conscientious and sensitive teen. She ardently believed what she was taught and would believe even if it led to martyrdom.
In college, Bethany got exposed to reformed theology and progressive Christianity. She began to think, “There is no, ‘God says,’ or ‘Scripture says.’ These are all interpretations.”
After college, Bethany moved to California. She immediately joined a church, but it wasn’t the same. She was no longer tied to it the way she had been; she finally had space to think for herself.
In California, Bethany’s been able to think, hike, read and realize who she is without outside influence, but it hasn’t been easy. She’s been afraid and uncertain, still haunted by some of her old beliefs. But she is free and life is full even while she is still “in process.”
Book Recommendations
PaidAmazonLinks
Untamed by Glennon Doyle
https://amzn.to/3IHW945
Educated by Tara Westover
https://amzn.to/3tHRif2
Wayward by Alice Greczyn
https://amzn.to/3JHKFi5
Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
My interviews with Alice Greczyn
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/01/31/alice-greczyn-wayward/
https://gracefulatheist.com/2019/07/25/alice-greczyn-dare-to-doubt/
Full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/03/27/bethany-deconversion-anonymous/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Picture of Mt. Rainier by Bethany
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s guest is April Ajoy, viral Tiktok’r, youTuber and podcaster. She is a “recovering conservative humorously detoxing religion.”
April had a unique childhood. She was homeschooled and spent half of each year in Pentacostal spaces and the other half traveling the US with her family, singing and evangelizing.
Her parents were evangelists and her grandfather was a pastor of a megachurch, so even as a young person April had seen cracks in the traditions and beliefs. She didn’t see them as systemic, though, only random, separate incidents.
Over the next decade, tragedy hits April’s family and God does not step in to thwart it, a family member comes out to her and she realizes she cannot continue believing much of what white Christianity has painted as “good news”.
Today, much of April’s childhood beliefs have been dissected and thrown out, but she is loving others in a much deeper way. She still considers herself a Christian and is fighting injustices in her own creative way.
“Humor is how I cope with trauma.”
On social media, April tackles all the difficult subjects—white supremacy, misogyny, purity culture, the absurd things evangelicals post online and more! She brings levity and fun to serious topics in a way that will make you laugh out and that is good medicine.
Links TikTok
https://www.tiktok.com/@aprilajoy
https://www.instagram.com/aprilajoy/
https://twitter.com/aprilajoyr
Evangelicalish on Youtube
https://www.youtube.com/c/Evangelicalish
Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/03/20/april-ajoy-evangelicalish/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This is the three year anniversary of the Graceful Atheist Podcast. Thank you to everyone who has listened and participated. Special thanks to Mike T and Arline for their work on the podcast over the past year.
This week’s guest is Ryan Mulkowsky. Ryan grew up Independent Fundamentalist Baptist. He made a “profession of faith” when he was nine years old and was reading Christian apologetics before he was twelve. By fourteen, Ryan was “licensed” by the church and started teaching.
Ryan’s mental health suffered during adolescence. Whether at home, school or church, no place was safe for him to grow and change—strict dress codes, young-earth creationism, white-centered history books and virtually no sexual education.
Ryan went to one university that was even more conservative and strict than his high school, left and graduated from another with a degree in apologetics. But Ryan knew he wanted to be with people.
Soon Ryan was introduced to healthcare chaplaincy. For the first time, seeing people up-close in great physical and emotional need. He was also introduced to other religious faiths—Buddhism Orthodox Judaism and progressive Christianity.
Ryan is a now a secular humanist, married with a family and working as a grief coordinator for Hospice. His life has both meaning and purpose without religion. He is living out secular grace by providing comfort and peace in some of humanity’s most vulnerable moments.
Links Blog
https://www.ryanmulkowsky.com/
http://twitter.com/ryanmulkowsky
http://instagram.com/ryanmulkowsky
Some Random Thoughts Podcast
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/some-random-thoughts/id1523342430
Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/10/13/ryan-mulkowsky-some-random-thoughts/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s guest is Marla Taviano, author of Unbelieve: Poems on the Journey to Becoming a Heretic. Marla grew up in Middle America and moved across the globe and back, searching for God’s will for her life.
She grew up in a loving home and didn’t realize she was in a “white Christian bubble.” Her church was almost all-white, her hometown was almost completely white, and then after high school, Marla attended an even smaller completely white, conservative Christian college.
Marla’s first inkling that something was missing came when she read the book, The Hole in Our Gospel. She had read the Bible many, many times over the years, and here was a new revelation—2,000+ verses about helping the poor?
four-letter words
if you’ve never lived inside / the bubble of
evangelical Christianity it / might surprise you
to find that l-o-v-e / and p-o-o-r were new
and controversial subjects for me / at age 35
Less than a decade later, while she and her family were part of a multiethnic church plant, Marla began to see more “holes” in her Christianity, namely racism and white supremacy. Her eyes were slowly beginning to open.
Since 2015, Marla has been back and forth to Cambodia, written a book of poetry, started an incredibly popular bookstagram, been through a painful divorce, connected tons of people to one another and is still sharing her knowledge and wisdom with her followers.
In her search for truth, Marla asks often, “Is this loving to my neighbor?” She may not be certain what her beliefs are right now, but she does believe that love is what will change the world.
Links Amazon Paid Links
Unbelieve: Poems on the Journey to Becoming a Heretichttps://amzn.to/3sLNpoR
https://www.instagram.com/marlataviano/
https://www.instagram.com/whitegirllearning/
https://twitter.com/marlataviano
Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/03/06/marla-taviano-unbelieve/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s guest is Meghan Crozier, the writer behind The Pursuing Life blog and co-host of Thereafter Podcast. Meghan grew up in an Evangelical Free church and she was all in.
After high school, she went to a christian university, signing a pledge to become a missionary. Her life turned out differently, and though it took years to be okay with that, she is now extremely thankful she never became a missionary.
At the beginning of the pandemic while so much was changing in everyone’s lives, she clung to her faith. She journaled, prayed for an hour and read her bible every morning.
Since 2020, she began to see other aspects of her church that she could not unsee—homophobia, gaslighting, ableism.
Then the January 6th insurrection happened. After her church’s response to this disturbing event, Meghan knew she had to reconsider almost everything her life.
Meghan now holds her Christianity very loosely. She’s found community and connection online through Twitter, and through her blog and podcast. Meghan is an important voice in the deconstruction world, influencing people with the spoken and written word.
Links Twitter
https://twitter.com/thepursuinglife
https://twitter.com/thereafterpod
The Pursuing Life
https://www.thepursuinglife.com/
Thereafter Podcast
https://linktr.ee/thereafterpod
Prog/Post Xian Deconstruction Coffee Hour
6 AM PST / 9 AM EST on Twitter Spaces
Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Full episode show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/02/27/meghan-crozier-prog-post-christian-deconstruction/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconstruction
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s guest is the Nigerian podcaster, The Ranting Atheist. He grew up in a strict Pentacostal church where his parents were ministers. At home, his parents were tough on him and his brothers, and made sure they attended Christian schools, even into university.
While TRA was in university, following all the rules, his parents parents were rising in the ranks of their church. All was well until “church politics” got them. After that, his parents’ health began to decline, but TRA was still a believer.
But as years passed and Nigeria suffered an economic recession, TRA’s faith in the Christian God started to wane.
Between conversations about the Bible with a friend, Youtuber DarkMatter2525 and a false prophet in his church, many seeds of doubt were planted.
As an atheist, TRA wanted to find a way to assist other Nigerian atheists. His podcast The Ranting Atheist has been the perfect tool.
Every weekend a new episode is released “to let Nigerian atheists know that they are not crazy and they are not alone.” TRA is living out graceful atheism one podcast episode at a time.
Links The Ranting Atheist Podcast
https://www.podpage.com/TRAtheist/
https://www.instagram.com/tratheistpod/
Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group!
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s guest is Jeffrey Caldwell. Jeffrey grew up in Lancaster county, PA in a liberal denomination set in a conservative area. As a child, church was okay; it was filled with the usual things—bible crafts in Sunday school and singing in the choir. His family was “quasi-religious.” It was good for children to have morals, but no one was pressured to believe anything.
Jeffrey had doubted whether Christianity was real throughout middle school. Neither his parents nor his siblings took it very seriously. He left church in high school but was still searching for meaning.
Music, books and movies filled the space that religion often does. Eventually, his interest expanded to include philosophy, politics, social justice, all influenced by the “oldies” his dad played in the car.
In his twenties, Jeffrey struggled with mental health issues and after a surprise encounter with church, he knew he was missing community.
He didn’t fit in with the traditional religions, so he tried the UU church. Then he got involved in progressive politics and social justice, and eventually went to seminary. In seminary, Jeffrey became a chaplain.
Now, Jeffrey has created a thriving online and in-person community, Connections Humanist Community. Each week, people share stories and conversations. They belong to a community where they are valued and heard. Jeffrey is living out what it means to be a “graceful atheist.”
Links Connections Humanist Community
https://www.meetup.com/connections-humanist-community/
Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group!
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s episode is Natalie. Natalie grew up in a traditional Christian household, one of six kids. Living in the South and attending a Southern Baptist church most of her childhood and adolescence, however, left a bad taste in her mouth.
One place she found solace? Books. Natalie was an avid reader from a young age and reading authors like Judy Blume opened her eyes to a whole good and happy world outside of her Christian bubble. Fictional, though it was, that world made her wonder, “How can [my family] be so unhappy and still have these beliefs about this religion?”
Natalie escaped the South at seventeen for a few years and began seriously examining her childhood faith. Even as she was questioning her beliefs, she still lived amidst the family chaos, a daily reminder that she needed to escape again. Eventually, after a quick and clandestine wedding, she and her husband moved away.
It’s been a while since Natalie deconverted, and she has lived a fulfilling life, with both happy times and hard times. Today, seeing those who are deconstructing their faith, she empathizes deeply .
Author Recommendations * Judy Blume * Grace Livingston Hill
Interact Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
This week’s episode is Matt Oxley. Matt has what he calls a “Bapti-costal” background—mainstream Southern Baptist with “some extra flair and drama.” At six, he was saved, by thirteen he was “hardcore about faith” and by high school, his beliefs were his whole world.
However, when he was nineteen he left church over doctrinal issues, for a called it a “sabbatical” and took a few years to genuinely examine his convictions.
He knew he had to believe the “cardinal doctrines,” if he was to accept all the other beliefs. But how much could he see was wrong and still ignore it?
He was no longer one hundred percent sure he believed in God, much less Christianity, and it didn’t feel like God was doing anything to help him believe.
Eventually he admitted to himself that he was an atheist. At first, he became an “anti-apologist,” spreading a different gospel, but over time he has found a balance.
Now that eternal retribution is no longer a possibility, Matt holds his beliefs lightly. He is able to parlay with both Christians and humanists, asking hard questions and stirring up all kinds of discussion—Biblical history, Jesus versus Paul, fundamentalism, capitalism, sexuality, and more.
Today, Matt’s gospel is love. He no longer believes in a god or in struct doctrines, but he is optimistic about the church’s future. He’s influencing it for the better, once kind and hard conversation at a time.
Links Raging Rev
https://ragingrev.com/
Pastor With No Answers
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/pastor-with-no-answers-and-friends-podcast/id1046402610
Interact Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s guest is Judah. Judah grew up “Church of God, Pentecostal adjacent,” where Judah’s father was convinced, “God is alive in these people.” By eight years old, Judah was speaking in tongues and absorbed into eschatology—the study of the end times.
Around ten, at a more “separatist” church, the family started homeschooling. His church and family were convinced they were right and everyone else was wrong. Answers in Genesis was the science curriculum, but Judah was also exposed to science on public television.
As a teen, another pillar began to crack. Judah believed his attraction to guys and girls was sinful. It felt like God was two opposing forces—one god you lean into for love and grace, the other shames and condemns you.
Judah doubled down on young earth creationism and repressing his sexual attractions and dove deeper into eschatology. The family’s eschatology changed over time, but 2012 was the year the end of the world would come.
Eventually 2012 comes and 2012 goes. This undid Judah. He spends the next three years learning what else was not true, debunking creationism, conspiracies and various theological matters.
Judah was a more liberal Christian for a while but eventually science and logic led him to become an agnostic atheist. He came out with his beliefs to his family in dramatic fashion and hasn’t looked back. His future is in his own hands and whether his family takes responsibility for their beliefs and actions during his childhood is in theirs. He now lives a life true to himself and his own values and ethics.
Links Judah’s blog
https://jmedic.medium.com/
Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group!
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s guest is Will from Heretical Theology.
Will grew up in a Methodist church until high school, when he began attending youth group in what he now calls the, “cult church.” Years later, will he and his wife were still at that church, he would have a seemingly supernatural experience at his brother’s church in Florida. The decide to move, and not only was there a megachurch waiting for them, there was also Disney World!
Will and his wife dove right in! They served at the megachurch for about five years when his wife began to doubt her beliefs. Eventually, Will resigned himself to being alone in his faith.
Slowly, however, Will’s fundamentalist beliefs shifted. He wanted to understand the Bible better, so he could understand his wife better. He decided to take off his “Jesus colored glasses,” and read the Bible differently. It wasn’t long before he had a number of issues with what he was reading.
Then enters the Republican nomination of Donald Trump. Will felt like he was in the “twilight zone,” not understanding how Christians were getting behind Trump.
He and his wife stopped going to the main services but were still in small group. The pastor met with Will to discuss “ministry,” but instead Will needed to pour out all his questions and concerns. The pastor dismissed them. It may not have been intentional, but it still hurt. A few months later, he knew he no longer believed.
Today, Will uses Instagram to share what’s learned from the Bible.
“I know some shit about the Bible, and I would like to put that to some good use.”
He’s taking the “decades of useless Bible knowledge” he has to teach and challenge people, in hopes that his followers will outgrow him and move on to do amazing things.
Recommendations:
- Sam Harris (books & podcast)
- Bart Ehrman (books & classes on Wondrium)
- Paulogia (YouTube)
- Yuval Noah Harari (Books: Homo Deus, 21 lessons for the 21st century & Sapiens)
Links Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/heretical_theology/
Am I happier?
https://www.instagram.com/p/CXM4sStrey2/
Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group!
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s returning guest is Carlene! She grew up in the Independent Church of Christ—a cappella music, wholly male leadership, baptism before heaven and Biblical inerrancy.
One church teaching that took up too much emotional energy was the constant push to be baptized. She was told, “you’ll feel so much better when you do it. You’ll feel so clean.” But it felt inauthentic to publicly say, “I’m a sinner,” when she didn’t feel like that was true.
Carlene’s home life was similar to church life—patriarchal, authoritarian, traditional and conservative. Carlene was an obedient child who did not question authority, so she remembers a healthy, happy childhood. Her two sisters, however, remember profoundly different childhoods.
In high school, Sunday school lessons were always about “staying pure.” Her boyfriend started going to church with her. They followed the rules and were eventually baptized at the same time. It wasn’t long, however, before Carlene’s beliefs would become real to her.
Carlene’s boyfriend went into the military and was sent to Afghanistan. She prayed and prayed for his safety, and at the time it seemed like he returned home safely. They got married and have been married for ten years. Over time, however, they have learned that there are both visible wounds and invisible.
While in college, Carlene first learned about evolution. It was this plus friends coming out as gay, working as a police detective and eventually the election of Donald Trump that, over many years, made her question again and again what she had always been taught.
It was “the death of a thousand cuts,” and it took almost a decade, but Carlene is now an atheist who finds a glorious sense of awe and wonder in nature without Christian beliefs “taking up space and living rent-free” in her mind.
Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group!
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s guest is Derek Webb, musician, song writer and public deconstructor. For 10 years, Derek was a member of the Christian rock band, Caedmon’s Call. He then went on to a solo career where he focused on self reflection in his art. During that time, Derek began to desconstruct. He did so publicly in his music and on social media.
For Derek’s Fingers Crossed album, “the tale of two divorces,” Derek made himself available to his audience for criticism. He and his team turned this into the podcast, The Airing of Grief. What could have been a public expression of anger and hostility at Derek’s change of heart, wound up being people describing their own deconstruction. It was a poignant reminder that we are not alone in this process.
Derek’s next album, Targets, is a joyous and rebellious rock celebration of deconstruction. Derek’s current project, The Jesus Hypothesis, takes a second look at his former theological beliefs. For this project, Derek has made himself even more available to his audience by live streaming the writing and recording process for his Patreon supporters.
Derek is the perfect guest for the podcast as his art, music and personal style exemplify an both honesty contest and Secular Grace.
Links Derek’s Website
https://www.derekwebb.com/
The Airing Of Grief
https://www.theairingofgrief.com/
https://www.instagram.com/derekwebb/
Patreon
https://patreon.com/derekwebb
Interact Full show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/01/02/derek-webb-the-jesus-hypothesis/
Is it just that I had the wrong image of god?
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/11/17/is-it-just-that-i-had-the-wrong-image-of-god/
The Bubble
https://gracefulatheist.com/2018/01/15/the-bubble/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Attribution Transition music by Derek Webb from the Fingers Crossed album
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
Ask Me Anything 2021.
Questions from Sheila, Emily, Rick and Mark, Jimmy, Arline, Judah, and Matt.
Links Deconversion How To
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Still Unbelievable
https://anchor.fm/still-unbelievable/episodes/Episode-39—Deconstructing-a-Deconstruction-Deconstruction-els542
https://anchor.fm/still-unbelievable/episodes/Episode-64—Discussing-Sean-McDowell-and-John-Marriot-on-deconversion-part-1-e195h0h
Paulogia on Babylon Bee’s ExVangelicals
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IMFQJPKYK28
Exvangelical on Evangelical response to Deconstruction
https://www.irreverent.fm/show/exvangelical-1/on-the-deconstruction-discourse/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Anthony Pinn
https://gracefulatheist.com/2020/08/23/dr-anthony-pinn-humanism-and-race/
Amy Rath
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/06/06/amy-rath-nonelife/
Bart campolo
https://gracefulatheist.com/2020/07/09/bart-campolo-humanize-me/
Why I am not an Anti-Theist
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/10/17/why-i-am-not-an-anti-theist/
My Deconversion Sotry
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/09/10/common-message/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
The Holidays: The Big White Elephant in the Room
When one has deconverted, the holidays may look completely different, reexamining everything from family traditions to singing carols to dealing with those extended family members. On today’s episode, two returning guests, Arline and Lars and a new guest, Carlene, share how the holidays have and haven’t changed since deconversion.
Lars and Arline go into what it’s like to be an unbelieving parent during the holidays, navigating the mythologies of Santa and Jesus. Children ask genuine questions, and they expect genuine answers.
The group discusses what they have not given up, among other things, singing Christmas carols. Carols are different than singing religious songs at church, more cultural than sacred. For some, however, it takes a little self-discipline to sing along without critiquing the lyrics.
The guests also examine what they have thrown in the trash bin completely, including, but not limited to, the phrase “Merry Christmas” and all those nativity scenes.
Holidays spent with extended family can be especially challenging, regardless of religious beliefs. Each person is finding their own unique ways of making the most of their time with family, especially being grateful. Religion does not own the rights to thanksgiving.
Lastly, Carlene, David, Lars and Arline consider some new traditions they’ve started or would like to start. Nature is the easiest place to experience awe and wonder, and everyone discussed ways to be in nature more this winter. Also, creating new traditions can be awkward and may not always turn out quite like we hope.
It is a lovely conversation, full of hope and lots of humor.
Book Recommendations
PaidLinks
Small Creatures Such as We by Sasha Sagan
https://amzn.to/3dobtFO
Grace Without God by Katherine Ozment
https://amzn.to/3oqmUmP
Good Without God by Greg Epstein
https://amzn.to/3opdjwg
Interact Send in a recorded AMA question
https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Photo by Thomas Bormans on Unsplash
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s guest is Jose Ramos, Hannah’s husband from her episode two weeks ago.
Jose’s family converted to Independent Fundamentalist Baptist and his father became a pastor. They were taught that the IFB had the “pure word of God,” and it was their purpose to evangelize and change the world.
Throughout his teens, Jose’s only rebellion was, “like a month partying with [his] brothers.” Later, he went to Bible College, and then started preaching. He met Hannah and took over his father’s Spanish speaking church. Studying the Bible for ministry, however, brought more questions and doubts.
Over the next year, he continued preaching but knew he didn’t believe. He left the ministry and later told Hannah why. After another hard and depressive year, he knew he was agnostic.
Jose gave Hannah the space to go on her own journey. They still attended church as a family, but he did not try to change her. Today, their stories can give comfort to other couples facing religious doubts and uncertainties.
Jose’s honesty and vulnerability show the grace and goodness in his own human heart. No more looking forward to heaven or fearing hell, simply being present in each movement and looking for the beauty that’s found there.
Recommendations Books
PaidLinks
Sapiens by Yuval Noah Harari
https://amzn.to/3xuaddv
(Also available in graphic novel form)
https://amzn.to/319PbEF
https://amzn.to/3E93tV2
Homo Deus by Yuval Noah Harari
https://amzn.to/3CXUNiF
Podcasts
Sam Harris’ Making Sense
https://www.samharris.org/
Links Hannah’s episode
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/11/14/hannah-ramos-unequally-yoked-to-deconverted/
Clergy Project
https://clergyproject.org/
Interact Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
“Good afternoon. Good evening. And good night.”
This week’s episode is a compelling discussion between David and past podcast guests Jimmy and Colin. They take a deep dive into how The Truman Showmirrors the long, painful journey of deconstruction—realizing the story you’ve been told isn’t quite what it seems, pushing back little by little, and then sometimes leaving completely, walking out the door and into the darkness.
“You never had a camera in my head.”
They consider it all:
- The trauma and fears induced
- Infantilization
- The constant gaslighting
- The creation and controlling of relationships
- And the lies, a completely fabricated life.
All done to “love him, protect him.”
They each bring their own stories to the table, stories of courage and uncertainty and a desire for truth, stories that resonate with many people. Like Truman, we can lean in when what we’ve believed no longer lines up with what we’re experiencing. We can be curious, ask questions and see where that journey takes us.
Links Where to stream The Truman Show
https://www.justwatch.com/us/movie/the-truman-show
Final scene
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gn5kuDdeGzs
Interact Full show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/11/21/movie-review-the-truman-show/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Hannah Ramos. Hannah grew up in an Independent Fundamentalist Baptist family, one of ten homeschooled children. Dissuaded from going to bible college, she waited for her Prince Charming. When Jose showed up to speak at her church, she knew he was “God’s choice” for her as a husband.
Very early in their marriage, Jose took over as pastor of a Spanish speaking church. Everything seemed to be going according to God’s plan, until three years later when Jose admitted to Hannah that he no longer believed. Suddenly, she found herself in an unequally yoked relationship.
For six years, Hannah focused on her own faith and raising their three children as believers, and they loved one other through this time. Jose supported Hannah’s faith, and Hannah had given up on changing Jose’s mind. Hannah had the space to begin to question her own faith.
Her children innocently asked her to explain the Trinity, and they were not satisfied with her answers. She read through the Bible, asking, “But is this true?” She no longer could assume that it was. Finally the pat answers Hannah received no longer satisfied her, and she admitted to herself that she also no longer believed.
To Jose’s amazement (and slight disbelief), Hannah revealed that she was no longer a Christian. Today, they are closer than ever, and their children are free to decide for themselves what they believe. Hannah has found a peace she did not think was possible.
Interact Full show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/11/14/hannah-ramos-unequally-yoked-to-deconverted/
Lars and Christie episode
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/09/26/lars-and-christie-deconverted-family/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Phil Quagliariello who blogs at Phil Q Musings. Phil grew up as a PK in Independent Fundamentalist Baptist Churches which, of course, were the one true Church. He moved around often as a kids and saw the dark side of ministry when his father was removed from a church by the board for being too “new fangled.” He went through the entirety of his education including college in Christian schools.
Phil eventually found himself in Calvary Chapel churches were they were more exegetical, focused on the Bible. He got married and they both were worship leaders. Eventually, the concept of the “Emergent Church” came to their church and Phil lead the worship for that service. Unfortunately, that marriage did not last. Phil found himself seeking a church experience that was more authentic and “that did not suck.” He found a faith community that met in the basement of a bar that at first he found satisfying.
Phil remarried to a women with two children. These children and the children they have together became the light of his life. Phil began to recognize the trauma of his upbringing: the fear of punishment and the fear of Hell. And he focused on being parent who does not use fear as a weapon.
Phil began to seriously doubt Evangelicalism during the 2016 election. But he still hung on to the church experience until the Jan 6th election when he could no longer call himself an Evangelical, a Christian or a believer.
Phil has a particularly good answer to how he finds meaning in his life.
Links Phil Q Musings Blog
https://philqmusings.wordpress.com/
Interact Ginna’s Episode
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/10/10/ginna-deconversion-anonymous/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Jack Robertson, host of the Musings of an ADD mind podcast. He grew up with a super Evangelical Southern Baptist mother and always went to church. As a teenager he became super religious himself until a confidant let the whole youth group know he was having sex with his girlfriend. Then he stopped going to church for a while.
Then late in his 30s Jack got heavily involved in an Oklahoma City based megachurch. He read through the bible three times.
But, jack always had questions. “In the Exodus story god is the bad guy, not Pharaoh. If man was created in god’s image then wicked pre-flood people that were so evil he needed to destroy the world would be a reflection of him.”
Jack asks himself if he really believed or if it was his ADD hyper focus on Christianity that kept him in for so long.
After a friend asked for prayer for a job interview it hit him, “how would god decide? Go with whoever had the most friends pray? The person who’s friends prayed the most? Use a prayer version of comment winner generator?”
After a deep dive into Mesopotamian history he realized it was all just stories.
The 2016 election and then his son coming out as bi-sexual finalized his decision. He no longer believes
Links Musings of an ADD Mind
https://open.spotify.com/show/0ebZTxuf9YUOrT58H4TvRK?si=DpVTS3YwSU-BuyGTEyy5lw&utm_source=copy-link
Website
https://www.podpage.com/musings-of-an-add-mind/
Facebook page
https://www.facebook.com/musngsofanaddmind/
Interact Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Jon Steingard
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/01/03/jon-steingard-the-wonder-and-the-mystery-of-being/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Mark Landes, a former Army officer who is working toward becoming a humanist chaplain. Mark grew up in the United Methodist tradition. He went to West Point and became an officer in the Army. He wanted to become an Army chaplain.
Mark’s army career is a fascinating tale in itself. He was stationed in West Berlin shortly before the fall of the Berlin Wall. Then during the Gulf War he volunteered to go to Kuwait and experienced the first air raid of the Gulf War. Mark was also a gay man in the military before the time of “don’t ask don’t tell” when there were witch hunts to remove gay military members. He was investigated and removed with an “other than honorable” discharge.
Understandably, Mark went through time of deep depression. To make maters worse when he returned to the states he joined a 12 step group that was in effect a group conversion therapy. It is during this dark time of his life that Mark began to question the reality of god. Through a years long process Mark deconverted eventually admitting to himself he no longer believed.
Mark has since become a humanist celebrant and has made an attempt to get a Masters in Divinity to become a humanist chaplain. In this process he began his “theological anthropology” which has led him to tell his story. He now wants to get a Masters in Pastoral care and is hoping to create an “institutional chaplaincy” in the business world. This humanist journey began with him asking the question, “how can I make the world a better place?”
Links Mark’s Blog
https://humanistchaplainjourney.blogspot.com/
Captain Cassidy
https://gracefulatheist.com/2019/10/17/captain-cassidy-roll-to-disbelieve/
Sasha Sagan
https://gracefulatheist.com/2020/02/06/sasha-sagan-for-small-creatures-such-as-we/
Interact Full show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/10/24/mark-landes-military-deconversion-and-humanism/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Thanks to Logan Thomas for the new Graceful Atheist Podcast art work
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s show is a Deconversion Anonymous episode.
My guest this week is Emily. Emily grew up in an Evangelical Free Church in the rural Midwest. She was on the Cubbies-Sparks-AWANA track. Around age 10, she became a pastor’s kid when her dad switched careers and went into ministry. Her early childhood experiences of church were fairly positive, but she struggled with severe fear of hell and the rapture from a young age.
The youth group setting was horribly unsuited to a sensitive introvert like. She was miserable being forced to attend churches where she didn’t know anyone except her parents.This discomfort in Christian circles continued through college.
After college, Emily spent a year in London doing a master’s degree. She immersed myself in the city’s amazing performing arts scene and met a lot of people with totally different backgrounds and beliefs to hers. That year really expanded her horizons, and when she moved back to the US, she pursued a career in performing arts administration.
For the first few years after grad school, Emily wasn’t ready to reject everything and say that she didn’t believe in God, but she had no interest in going to church, praying, reading the Bible, etc. Then the 2016 election happened, and she watched with horror as Christians whom she loved and admired went all-in for Trump. At that point, her indifference turned to disgust, and she wanted nothing to do with Christianity at all.
In the past 2-3 years Emily has really done the hard work of figuring out what she believes now and addressing the harm that her Christian background has caused. Emily has had to work through the baggage of purity culture as she is in her first long term relationship.
Therapy with a focus on religious trauma has been helpful. Emily is discovering who she is, relish the arts and experiencing the joy of being a human being.
Interact We are very excited to announce the new private Deconversion Anonymous Facebook Group. The group will be administered by Arline from episode 71. Please join us in building a community of graceful human beings.
Deconversion Anonymous Facebook Group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Full show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/10/17/emily-deconversion-anonymous/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Thanks to Logan Thomas for the new Graceful Atheist Podcast art work
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s show is a Deconversion Anonymous episode.
My guest this week is Ginna. Ginna is a software developer in her 30’s. She went through deconversion in her 20’s after suffering depression during her college years. Even though there were Christians around her who were on medication for their depressions no one was public about it. The implied stigma kept her from reaching out for help and kept her from finding the right treatment when she did.
After college she went to a ” shelter for honest questions” called L`Abri to find answers to her questions. Her questions were pointed and personal. The questions of theodicy, divine hiddenness and theological evil. She “had a really good time, but [she] didn’t get answers to the questions that [she] had.”
After a brief stint in a liturgical church, which she loved, she stopped going to church and gained some perspective. She realized she could no longer believe in a god where there was no practical difference between non-existence and said god being evil.
Ginna eventually received the help she needed for her mental health. She had to try multiple different doctors and therapies until she found the right combination. Today she is excited about exploring secular community and growing as a human being.
Interact We are very excited to announce the new private Deconversion Anonymous Facebook Group. The group will be administered by Arline from episode 71. Please join us in building a community of graceful human beings.
Deconversion Anonymous Facebook Group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion
Full show notes with quotes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/10/10/ginna-deconversion-anonymous/?gaid=gap92
Magic Feathers and Sugar Pills
https://gracefulatheist.com/2018/03/21/magic-feathers-and-suger-pills/?gaid=gap92
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/?gaid=gap92
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/?gaid=gap92
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Monique. Monique grew up a cultural Christian until the family of her boyfriend “made it known they were Southern Baptists.” She married that boyfriend and had kids. He became abusive. First psychologically, then spiritually and eventually physically. He gas lit her, told her she was not worthy and that she was not following god, and called her purity culture epithets we won't recount here.
After years of isolation and spiritual abuse, Monique left after executing a cloak and dagger level plan to serve divorce papers and a restraining order simultaneously. Eventually, her kids were taken from her as he had lawyers and she did not. She was estranged from them for years.
Monique went through a deconstruction and deconversion that began to give her some peace. Her youngest son reached out to her to tell her he is gay. She opened up her arms and showed grace, love and respect. She and her daughter attempted to reunite but this was ruined when the daughter took offence to a passing joke about prayer.
Today, Monique is free and loving learning true things. Her and her new husband (who happens to be a believer) have respect and love for each other. Monique is telling her story to give hope to others so they may know they are not alone.
Interact Full show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/10/03/monique-deconversion-anonymous/?gaid=gap91
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/?gaid=gap91
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/?gaid=gap91
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guests this week are Lars, Christie, Teddy, Amy and Eleanor, a whole family who deconverted around the same time. Lars felt a sense of duty to be a Christian all his life because he believed it was true. Christie felt there was “good evidence” for parts of the Bible and accepted that the rest was true. This worked until both of them came to the conclusion there was not enough evidence to believe.
During the pandemic with Church on screen rather than in person, both Lars and Christie began to feel the freedom from Church. They eventually admitted to each other that they no longer believed. A few months later they asked the kids, “do you notice anything we are not doing any longer?” To which they responded, “church.” None of them seemed to miss it too much other than friends and the snacks!
Lars and Christie also share about Lars’ demi-sexuality and the difficult early conversations around sex when they were first getting married. This highlights the destructive aspects of purity culture on everyone.
Today the whole family is feeling free, intellectually honest and relieved after admitting to themselves they no longer believe and stopped going to church.
Links Answers To Answers In Genesis FB group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/answers2aig/
William Lane Craig admitting it is the witness of the holy spirit not evidence
- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2VWEFY4JuGk
- http://www.reasonablefaith.org/videos/other-videos/what-is-the-inner-witness-of-the-holy-spirit
- https://youtu.be/wRm3PFFg97I?t=128
- https://youtu.be/cYq-xNpokEs?t=37
Interact Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/?gaid=gap90
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/?gaid=gap90
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My returning guest this week is Jimmy. Jimmy and I review Julia Galef’s book Scout Mindset: Why Some People See Things Clearly and Others Don’t. We explore the book from two lenses: Deconversion and Secular Grace. Jimmy brings an intense focus on humility, self-honesty and truth seeking to the conversation. The perfect complement to Julia’s book.
Julia GalefThe best description of motivated reasoning I’ve ever seen comes from psychologist Tom Gilovich. When we want something to be true, he said, we ask ourselves, “Can I believe this?,” searching for an excuse to accept it. When we don’t want something to be true, we instead ask ourselves, “Must I believe this?,” searching for an excuse to reject it.
...
In contrast to directionally motivated reasoning, which evaluates ideas through the lenses of “Can I believe it?” and “Must I believe it?,” accuracy motivated reasoning evaluates ideas through the lens of “Is it true?”
Links Jimmy’s first appearance on the podcast
https://gracefulatheist.com/2020/09/20/jimmy-deconversion-anonymous/
Scout Mindset: Why Some People See Things Clearly and Others Don’t
https://amzn.to/3nFCKd9
Soldiers and Scouts
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yfRC8ZgBXZw
Why Buddhism is True
https://amzn.to/3nGnXyM
Humanist Ten Commitments
https://americanhumanistcenterforeducation.org/ten-commitments
Daryl Davis, who attends KKK rallies and has helped many leave:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Daryl_Davis
Interact Full show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/09/19/book-review-scout-mindset-with-jimmy/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s show is a Deconversion Anonymous episode.
My guest this week is Sara. Sara is “a musician from a home of musicians.” She grew up in an Assemblies of God church in a “vibrantly faithful home.” She spent her teen years in a “cool” Southern Baptist Church. She then spent some time in Acts 29 churches and Reformed theology. To round things out she attended a Presbyterian (PCA) church.
Sara started having doubts in college, but she was able to ignore them for some time. They eventually wore her down. Parenthood was the last straw. She realized she loved her son more than God loved anyone. God’s “hiddenness” was neglect that any parent could recognize.
Sara had been a worship leader. This usefulness kept her in the church longer than she would have otherwise. It also contributed to her deconversion as she saw what church was like “back stage.”
Now Sara writes on her blog, Former Protagonist, about her deconversion experience. She is also exploring Humanism and loving her family.
Links Former Protagonist Blog
https://formerprotagonist.blogspot.com/
Interact Full show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/09/12/sara-deconversion-anonymous/?gaid=gap88
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/?gaid=gap88
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/?gaid=gap88
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s show is a Deconversion Anonymous episode.
My guest this week is Joel. Joel grew up in the WELS Lutheran church. He met his wife at a Christian group during college. They attended a few churches, one of which was Mars Hill, Mark Driscoll’s church.
Joel began to question what he had been taught. He began noticing discrepancies in scripture. He began to see the way the Church handled LGBTQ rights and the role of women was wrong.
He was able to reconnect with his sister as they grieved the loss of his grandfather. He discovered that she had deconstructed as well. He began to see atheism as not just reductionist and evil but as a viable option.
Today he is making his unequally yoked relationship work with mutual respect and love. And he is experiencing “absolute joy that the shackles are off.”
Interact Full show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/08/29/joel-deconversion-anonymous/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/?gaid=gap87
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/?gaid=gap87
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Stephanie, the host of the StephUp Podcast where she “delve[s] into different topics to learn more about the world and more about ourselves.” Stephanie had me on her podcast to delve into atheism.
In this episode, Stephanie describes her journey of deconstruction of Christianity, politics and conservative culture. She is focused on caring for people and shedding racism, sexism and abusive behavior within and without the Church.
Stephanie lives up to the honesty contest while describing: the burden of a “relationship with God,” purity culture and being single in the Church, and her disappointments with Church leadership. Ultimately, I believe Stephanie is an important voice of change within the Church.
Links StephUp Podcast
https://stephuppodcast.com/
What should Dragon Do
https://www.stephanieannwebb.com/
https://www.instagram.com/stephup_podcast/
https://twitter.com/steph_ann_webb
My interview on the StephUp podcast
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/lets-talk-about-atheism-with-the-graceful-atheist/id1527866039?i=1000530710497
Interact Jon Steingard interview
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/01/03/jon-steingard-the-wonder-and-the-mystery-of-being/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Eli Fuhrmler-Wheeler. Eli grew up going to Awanas at an Evangelical Free church. Eventually, he attended an Assemblies of God church and spoke in tongues. His parents forbade him from going to that church and “of course I felt they were keeping me from the gates of heaven and pulling me into hell.”
Eli’s childhood was traumatic in many ways. He experienced sexual abuse, neglect, his mom was very sick her whole life, her boyfriends were abusive, his father had an antisocial personality disorder, and he lived on and off in foster homes.
Eli sought the comfort of drugs and alcohol. He discovered he was a lesbian. He was told he was going to hell by his family.
As an adult, he began a relationship with his now-wife. At 30 he realized he was a man and began transition. Eli has faced rejection by family and some friends. However, his gracefulness through it all has won some of them over.
Eli deconstructed from Christianity through the years. He has explored various world religions including Norse Heathenry and various mystic traditions.
Transition and therapy have given Eli the wholeness he deserves. Eli and his wife show unconditional love for one another. This is the relationship that Eli has experienced grace for himself.
Links Secular Therapy
https://www.seculartherapy.org/
Religious Trauma Institute
https://www.religioustraumainstitute.com/
Interact Thank you for nominating the podcast for the People’s Choice award in the Religion and Spirituality category
https://www.podcastawards.com/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/?gaid=gap85
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/?gaid=gap85
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s show is a Deconversion Anonymous episode.
My guest this week is Jason, the son of a pastor. He grew up in the independent Christian Churches, an offshoot of the Church of Christ that allows music. He grew up doing “sword drills” and was a devout teenage believer. He participated in Bible memorization contests. He became a musician and participated in worship bands for years.
In Jason’s young adulthood he began to question his own interpretation of the Bible. Why was bad language bad? Why the limited role of women in the church? How could a loving god send people to Hell? Eventually, the disparity between the idea of a loving god and the reality of the world and the suffering of innocent children led to his deconversion.
Jason’s wife is still a believer though they both deconstructed from Evangelicalism and started participating in an Episcopal church. They are making an “unequally yoked” relationship work based on love, equality and mutual respect.
Links Captain Cassidy interview
https://gracefulatheist.com/2019/10/17/captain-cassidy-roll-to-disbelieve/?gaid=gap84
Roll To Disbelieve
https://www.patheos.com/blogs/rolltodisbelieve/
Interact Full show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/08/08/jason-deconversion-anonymous/?gaid=gap84
Deconversion Anonymous
https://gracefulatheist.com/category/podcast/deconversion-anonymous/?gaid=gap84
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/?gaid=gap84
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/?gaid=gap84
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Geoffrey Wallis, author of A Voice From Inside: Notes on Religious Trauma in a Captive Organization. Geoffrey is Physically In but Mentally Out (PIMO) of the Jehovah’s Witnesses. After recognizing the religious trauma and the cognitive dissonance he was experiencing he found help through therapy. He remains within the Watchtower organization because it is a “captive organization” which enforces shunning by family members and friends.
Geoffrey’s book, A Voice From Inside: Notes on Religious Trauma in a Captive Organization, is an evenhanded look at life inside a High Demand Religious Group. Geoffrey shows Secular Grace in his documenting his personal experience. It is incredibly well written and interesting to read.
Links A Voice From Inside: Notes on Religious Trauma in a Captive Organization
https://amzn.to/3BRvmjv
Website
https://www.wallisbooks.com/
Interact Nominate and Vote for the Graceful Atheist Podcast on the Podcast Awards
https://www.podcastawards.com/app/nominations
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/?gaid=gap83
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/?gaid=gap83
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is David. David is the son and grandson of pastors. He does has have good memories of growing up in the church and he credits his parents with restraint. As an adult, he became more fundamentalist. He was a Southern Baptist and went through a very strong Calvinist phase.
David taught apologetics classes. He delved into apologetics to qualm his own questions. But teaching apologetics on topics like the Trinity led to more doubt not less. It was a re-read through the Bible where he began to recognize the god of the Bible is not a loving one. The full implications of Reformed theology began to have horrifying implications.
Ultimately, David deconverted and now calls himself agnostic. Today David is the co-host of the That’s Questionable podcast
Links Website
http://thatsquestionable.net/
https://www.instagram.com/thatsquestionablepodcast/
https://twitter.com/thatsquestiona1
Interact Nominate and Vote for the Graceful Atheist Podcast on the Podcast Awards
https://www.podcastawards.com/app/nominations
Full show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/07/25/david-thats-questionable/?gaid=gap82
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/?gaid=gap82
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/?gaid=gap82
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Daniel Kelly, the new co-host of When Belief Dies. Daniel began as a Charismatic Christian, moved to an Orthodox Christian church, and eventually was at a Bible church that preached through every verse in the bible.
Daniel was a dedicated Christian working in a Christian non-profit helping those with disabilities. His mother had MS when he grew up so he was focused on helping his family through difficult times and did not always get to be a kid.
Daniel’s feminism and belief in the humanity of the LGBTQ community led to moral objections to some of the harder Biblical passages that do not uphold the humanity and full autonomy of everyone. His serious investigations into theology and the Bible were some of the early seeds that led to deconversion.
The grief Daniel experienced leaving the faith and the loss were profound. He lost his faith, his community, the health of his relationship and on top of that the pandemic hit. He was isolated and alone. He experienced “Hell Anxiety” and worried he was a “vessel of wrath.” The first year after deconversion was one of the most difficult of his life.
He made it through and today he is the co-host of the When Belief Dies podcast. He is building healthy relationships and restoring family relations. He is experiencing the freedom to love people unconditionally.
Links When Belief Dies Podcast
https://whenbeliefdies.com/
Recovering From Religion
https://www.recoveringfromreligion.org/
Secular Therapy
https://www.seculartherapy.org/
Interact Sam and Daniel interview me
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/05/23/sam-and-daniel-interview-david-ames-the-graceful-atheist/?gaid=gap81
Daniel and I interview Sam
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/when-belief-dies-bonus-inquisition-daniel-kelly-david/id1516058806?i=1000522850337
Tris Mamone’s Finding Faith in Secular Grace
https://www.splicetoday.com/writing/finding-faith-in-secular-grace
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/?gaid=gap81
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/?gaid=gap81
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s show is a Deconversion Anonymous episode.
My guest this week is Thomas. Thomas is a Missionary Kid. He was very close to his mother who passed away in her 40s when he was in middle school.
Thomas went through real depression for years after losing his mother and losing his faith. We discuss the hardships of grieving a loved one without comforting beliefs. He went through bouts of self-medication including being immersed in the massively multiplayer online game, World of Warcraft.
Thomas went on to become a professional scientist. The meditative nature of running was helpful. He also discovered actual meditation gave him peace. A rich and varied diet of podcasts also helped him along the way. He says he now experiences real joy that was only promised to him as a Christian.
Interact Nominate and Vote for the Graceful Atheist Podcast on the Podcast Awards
https://www.podcastawards.com/app/nominations
Full show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/07/11/thomas-deconversion-anonymous/?gaid=gap80
Deconversion Anonymous
https://gracefulatheist.com/category/podcast/deconversion-anonymous/?gaid=gap80
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/?gaid=gap80
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/?gaid=gap80
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Vanessa. She describes herself as “born into a large family of fire and brimstone preaching, bible beating, in-tongues-speaking Christians in the Pentecostal Church of God faith tradition.” Her father, her grandfather, and her great grandfather all were pastors of her home church.
She began to doubt at a fairly young age and discovered she no longer believed in god in her college years.
As a non-believer, she married her believing husband. Recently being unequally yoked has become a discussion point as they negotiate how to raise their daughter. Vanessa is grateful she can be present for her daughter in a way she did receive when she was young.
We discuss unequally yoked marriage, secular parenting, and post-traumatic church syndrome.
Interact Full show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/06/27/vanessa-post-traumatic-church-disorder/?gaid=gap79
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to?gaid=gap79/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/?gaid=gap79
Support the podcast
Via Anchor.fm and Stripe
Via Paypal: paypal.me/gracefulatheist
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Chris Highland. Chris is an author of over a dozen books, he was a Protestant minister for 14 years and an Interfaith (collaborative, open-minded, inclusive) chaplain for 25 years. Currently a Humanist celebrant, he has a B.A. in Philosophy and Religion from Seattle Pacific University and an M.Div. from San Francisco Theological Seminary.
My highest compliment to Chris is that he has been doing Secular Grace for most of his life.
Chris shares his love of nature and beauty. We discuss humanism, nature and loving believing spouses.
Links Friendly Freethinker Blog
https://chighland.com/
Clergy Project
https://clergyproject.org/
Why I am not an angry evangelical atheist
https://www.patheos.com/blogs/rationaldoubt/2019/02/why-im-not-an-angry-evangelical-atheist-part-1/
Do we have to choose between aggressive religion and aggravated atheism?
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/?gaid=gap78
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/?gaid=gap78
Books
Nature Is Enough
https://amzn.to/3qnp1XX
From Faith to Freedom
https://amzn.to/2TLEjcK
Attribution Additional music
Dakar Flow – Carmen María and Edu Espinal
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Travis. Travis documented his deconstruction on the blog measureoffaith.blog. There Travis has documented his journey from a questioning but dedicated Christian to a doubting agnostic. He delves into the apologetics that was supposed to give him comfort but ultimately led to the loss of faith.
This is one of the more emotionally raw episodes. Travis opens up about his grief at the loss of his beloved father. His dad was an example of faith well lived and it had a profound impact on Travis. We discuss what secular grief is like after one no longer can be comforted by belief in life after death.
I have been feeling a little conflicted putting this information out there that can potentially help people lose faith because it was so important to someone like my dad. It makes me question whether I really want to be a participant for taking that away from someone.
These days Travis feels like he has said what he needed to say on the blog. His compassion and empathy is evident in that he is more concerned with caring for the people in his life than endlessly debating apologetics and counter-apologetics.
Links https://measureoffaith.blog/
Interact Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/?gaid=gap77
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/?gaid=gap77
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Amy Rath, the host of the NoneLife podcast. NoneLife is dedicated to all those who check “None of the above” for a religious category and who do not feel comfortable being categorized any other way. The podcast is inspiring us all to do good in the world and to live an ethical life.
I’m Amy, and I’m a “none.” A what? Well, it took a lot of searching for me to find this term, but it fits perfectly. A “none” is someone who doesn’t belong to any particular religion. There are likely as many reasons for being a “none” as there are individuals, so we’re a hard group to label. Nones might be atheists, agnostics, former-members-of religions, humanists, etc. etc. etc.
Amy grew up a dedicated Catholic and was “all in.” In her late teens and early twenties she felt better “just not believing in anything.” In 2019 she discovered the term “None” as in “None of the above” and had a sense of “coming home.” “Finally there is a name for what I am.” She had found her people.
Amy started the NoneLife podcast so that others could discover this sense of finding themselves sooner. She has become an important and inspiring voice for Nones the world over.
Links Website
https://nonelife.org/
PechaKucha presentation
https://www.pechakucha.com/presentations/practicing-decency
Interact Full show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/06/06/amy-rath-nonelife/?gaid=gap76
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/?gaid=gap76
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/?gaid=gap76
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Michael, AKA Reverend Bones. Michael is an Australian singer/songwriter whose latest album Escape From Heaven is about his faith transition out of Evangelicalism.
Michael talks openly and honestly about how purity culture affected him and the religious trauma it produced.
Michael is now a climate activist and anti-purity culture activist. Michael uses his TicTok presence to speak out on these topics as well as the need for separation of church and state.
Links Website
https://www.reverendbones.com/
TikTok
https://www.tiktok.com/@reverend_bones
https://www.instagram.com/reverend_bones
Spotify
https://open.spotify.com/artist/6ITRWlI5YToDcwA1o7SdRi
Interact Full show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/05/30/michael-escape-from-heaven/?gaid=gap75
If you are interested in producing music for the Graceful Atheist Podcast, the sound I am looking for has a strong baseline and beat with gospel church organ, potentially with R&B or Gospel vocal samples. Here is a playlist to inspire you to Gospel R&B Beats. Get in touch.
https://open.spotify.com/playlist/27qcj0QlDP23O7SzQKaAUL
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/?gaid=gap75
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/?gaid=gap75
Attribution Music by Reverend Bones from Escape From Heaven
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week I am being interviewed by Sam and Daniel from the When Belief Dies podcast. The focus is on what I have changed my mind about since beginning work in the secular community. We discuss the following topics:
- The deconversion process
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/?gaid=gap74
https://gracefulatheist.com/2020/11/23/i-was-mistaken/?gaid=gap74 * Secular Grace
How the 12 steps influenced my conception of Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/secular-grace/?gaid=gap74 * Honesty contests
Talking with believers
The analogy of the Cathedral * Secular Grief
Letting go of an afterlife for oneself and one’s loved ones
The human desire for an afterlife represented in secular movies
This episode is a sister episode to Daniel and me interviewing Sam on When Belief Dies. Both episodes are dropping at the same time. You can see me in the YouTube version interviewing Sam.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-mtOgkvIqJU
Music If you are interested in producing music for the Graceful Atheist Podcast, the sound I am looking for has a strong baseline and beat with gospel church organ, potentially with R&B or Gospel vocal samples. Here is a playlist to inspire you to Gospel R&B Beats. Get in touch.
https://open.spotify.com/playlist/27qcj0QlDP23O7SzQKaAUL?si=d4fad72b30c64c94
Links When Belief Dies
https://whenbeliefdies.com/
https://linktr.ee/whenbeliefdies
Full show notes with much more
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/05/23/sam-and-daniel-interview-david-ames-the-graceful-atheist/?gaid=gap74
Attribution Photo graphic design by Logan Thomas, Beyond Belief
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
I begin every streaming interview with a question, “Hi, can you hear me?” Never has an affirmative answer to such a mundane question been so profound as it was with this week’s guest, Caroline Schwabe. Caroline had progressive hearing loss and eventually could no longer speak on the phone even with hearing aids. Almost by accident, she was referred to a Cochlear implant program in Canada during a routine hearing test. January 28, 2018, was her last deaf day. She has been on a three-year journey of rediscovery after receiving a Cochlear implant.
Along with her husband, Andreas, Caroline co-hosts a podcast called My Beautify Cyborg about her Cochlear implant journey. It describes the hopes and fears leading up to surgery and the joy and rediscovery after turning on the implant. Caroline’s gratitude and joy is infectious and comes through in each episode.
Caroline and Andreas had experienced major disappointments and hurts from the Church. At the same time, she was going through the implant process, both she and her husband were slowly leaving the Church. If not a full-blown deconstruction, they have been asking very hard questions and wrestling with the answers. This episode is unique in that there are two parallel stories: one of regaining hearing and one of questioning one’s faith.
Podcasts have played an outsized role in Caroline’s rediscovery of hearing and language recognition, including this one.
Links My Beautiful Cyborg
https://mybeautifulcyborg.com/
Links for Cochlear implant information
https://mybeautifulcyborg.com/links/
Interact Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/?gaid=gap73
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/?gaid=gap73
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s show is a Deconversion Anonymous episode.
My guest this week is Brette. Brette was so serious about her Christianity in junior high her goal was martyrdom. In her young adulthood, she followed her pastor’s advice and attended Master’s Commission, similar to a discipleship training program. Her experience there was nothing short of psychological torture.
Her faith began breaking down as did her physical and psychological health at Master’s Commission. It included deliverance sessions and enumerating her demons. It wasn’t until she saw her younger brother being treated poorly that she began to question. She and her brother left: “leaving was the BEST feeling!”
After a brief stint in “spiritual but not religious” land, she finally admitted she no longer believed in god. She let go of “trying to make it be true.”
Brette has since discovered naturalistic and psychological explanations of her experiences that have given her more closure and comfort.
Interact Sam (When Belief Dies) GoFundMe for a laptop
https://gofund.me/9bed67a7
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/?gaid=gap72
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/?gaid=gap72
Deconversion Anonymous
https://gracefulatheist.com/category/podcast/deconversion-anonymous/?gaid=gap72
Attribution Picture by Brette’s daughter A.
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s show is a Deconversion Anonymous episode.
My guest this week is Arline. Arline became a Christian in early adulthood. She went to a Christian college where she met her now-husband. Her faith tradition was a severe version of Calvinism. She taught complementarianism. The roles allowed for women and complementarianism were not a good fit for Arline’s inquisitive personality.
Her husband went through an emotional deconversion first. Arline did not take this as well as she would now like. Alongside this was the long slow deterioration of her mother’s health. She slowly began to deconstruct. First by exploring other versions of Christianity. Eventually exploring other faith traditions including meditation from a Buddhist perspective. In short. she was letting her curiosity and intelligence explore all the areas of interest that were previously prohibited.
In the end, for her own personal intellectual integrity, she admitted to herself she no longer believed. She has since discovered natural human habits that have helped her far more than her faith ever had.
Interact Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/?gaid=gap71
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/?gaid=gap71
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
Janice Selbie on the Conference on Religious Trauma (CORT)
The Conference on Religious Trauma
(#CORT) online
May 11 to 16, 2021
Links Conference on Religious Trauma
https://pheedloop.com/CORT/site/home/
https://twitter.com/cometocort
Face Book
https://www.facebook.com/ConferenceOnReligiousTrauma
Godless Moms Podcast
https://www.godlessmom.com/podcast
Friends of the podcast presenting at CORT * Janice Selbie
https://gracefulatheist.com/2019/11/27/janice-selbie-divorcing-religion/?gaid=cort2021 * Alice Greczyn
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/01/31/alice-greczyn-wayward/?gaid=cort2021 * Dave Warnock
https://gracefulatheist.com/2019/08/08/dave-warnock-dying-out-loud/?gaid=cort2021 * Clint Heacock
https://gracefulatheist.com/2020/04/30/dr-clint-heacock-reconstruction-after-deconstruction/?gaid=cort2021
Interact Full show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/04/29/?gaid=cort2021
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/?gaid=cort2021
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/?gaid=cort2021
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Michael Marvosh. Michael is the podcast host of Dead Man’s Forest and is working on his book Reality Knows the Truth: The Art and Artifice of Being Human. Michael and I discuss what it means to be human and the human experience of spirituality.
Michael tells us his deconversion story that he no longer sees as deconversion. He describes his rediscovery of a rational spirituality. Michael and I hit a broad range of conversation topics including having conversations that matter, models vs reality, A.I., Death Cafes, vision quests, blind spots and podcasting.
It was truly a conversation that mattered.
Links Contact Michael
mm@michaelmarvosh.com
Website
https://www.michaelmarvosh.com/projects
Dead Man’s Forest
https://www.deadmansforest.org/
Reality Knows the Truth: The Art and Artifice of Being Human
About Rational Spirituality–a way of looking at the world with a balance between ancient wisdom and modern reason.
https://michael.ck.page/d36a3d2338
Death Cafe
https://deathcafe.com/
Interact Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/?gaid=gap70
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/?gaid=gap70
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s show is a Deconversion Anonymous episode.
My guest this week is Sarah. Sarah says she may have one of the “longest deconstruction stories. She grew up in a fundamentalist Baptist church in an area where there were not that many Baptist churches. So she felt different from an early age. She was constantly attempting to live in the “will of God” but struggled to determine what that was. She knew from an early age that she was a doubter which equates to “backslider.”
Sarah was never comfortable with the limited roles allowed for women in the Church. Fortunately, her mother encouraged her to do and become whatever she wanted. Sarah was smart and interested in science. Studying science and biology did not fit the Young Earth Creationism she was taught at church.
Sarah and her husband were the one couple who were egalitarian while the young married couples group were all complementarian. Sarah was vocal about her thoughts on complemntarianism.
Sarah spent a long time outside the United States. When she returned to the United States she was shocked by the Christian Nationalism she heard from the pulpit.
Rachael Held Evens, Mike McHargue and David Hayward helped Sarah through her deconstruction. Today post-deconstruction she is interested in finding her “deconstructing friends” in real life.
Interact Full show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/04/18/sarah-deconstruction-anonymous/?gaid=gap69
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/?gaid=gap69
Deconversion Anonymous
https://gracefulatheist.com/category/podcast/deconversion-anonymous/?gaid=gap69
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/?gaid=gap69
Promotions Conference on Religious Trauma
https://pheedloop.com/CORT/site/home/
ReligionShouldntHurt
https://www.instagram.com/religion.shouldnt.hurt/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s show is a Deconversion Anonymous episode.
My guest this week is Carly. Carly shares her story with a great deal of vulnerability and emotion. Carly was a Christian Scientist. While studying philosophy and the Bible Carly was introduced to Christian Science. She was impressed with its logical arguments and internal consistency. Carly was more evangelistic than the church she attended. She wanted to use the Christian Science reading room during SXSW as an outreach. She was shot down. When she pointed out that prohibited alcohol would be consumed by renting the space out she was shot down again.
The juxtaposition of what Christian Science promised and the reality of life led her to doubt. Carly eventually found what she was looking for in more secular matters like work, exercise and therapy.
Interact Full show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/04/11/carly-christian-science-deconversion/?gaid=gap68
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/?gaid=gap68
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/?gaid=gap68
Deconversion Anonymous
https://gracefulatheist.com/category/podcast/deconversion-anonymous/?gaid=gap68
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s show is a Deconversion not so Anonymous episode.
My guest this week is Rachael Parsons Svendsen. Rachael is a Licensed Marriage and Family Counselor at RCPS Therapy. Rachael became a Christian at three years old. She went to Biola University and studied philosophy. Later in life, she experienced the effects of Religious Trauma: just setting foot in a Church she would break down in tears.
Honesty is an important value for Rachael and part of what led her to deconversion. She talks about the difficulty of relationships with believers in her life while attempting to maintain honesty.
Rachael and I investigate the experience of cognitive dissonance and religious trauma. We discuss the importance of the Easter story to Western thought, what is like to parent post-deconversion and the loss of the (false) sense of control after deconversion when difficult life events occur.
Rachael points out that she does not have it all together post-deconversion. We agree we are all winging it.
Links RCPS Therapy
https://rcpstherapy.com/
Small Words Big Stories
https://www.instagram.com/smallwords_bigstories/
Interact Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/?gaid=gap67
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/secular-grace/?gaid=gap67
Adverse Religious Experiences
https://gracefulatheist.com/category/adverse-religious-experiences/?gaid=gap67
Promos Religion Shouldn’t Hurt
https://www.instagram.com/religion.shouldnt.hurt/
Conference on Religious Trauma
https://pheedloop.com/CORT/site/home/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s show is a Deconversion Anonymous episode.
My guest this week is G.A.P. editor, Mike T. Mike grew up in the South and went to a Catholic church. Everyone in the South went to one church or another and this was just in the background for Mike. After a charismatic Evangelical friend encouraged him he began to explore charismatic churches. The big draw was the opportunity to play music, his life-long passion.
Later in life, married with kids, he had normal financial stresses in his life. When he compared the reality of both his life and the life of those around him to the promises of his more material success-oriented faith tradition he could not help but question. When a financial advisor suggested he hold off on his charitable giving, the mandated tithe, he expected consequences. Those consequences never occurred. Things were not adding up.
His first mistake was doing research on evangelists that would come to town. These fantastical claims must have generated news stories somewhere, right? His second mistake was re-reading the bible (and Bart Ehrman). Eventually, he discovered science and a new way of determining what is true. His faith fell apart.
Mike is the editor of the Graceful Atheist Podcast. Beyond editing, Mike wants to start a local community for those who are going through doubt, deconstruction and deconversion. Music continues to be the great passion of his life.
Links Clergy Project
https://clergyproject.org/
Interact Full show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/03/28/mike-t-deconversion-anonymous/?gaid=gap66
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/?gaid=gap66
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/?gaid=gap66
Deconversion Anonymous episodes
https://gracefulatheist.com/category/podcast/deconversion-anonymous/?gaid=gap66
Attribution "Dawg Biscuits on the Moon" and "Restless Regions"
John Monson and the Galaxy Brothers
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Ian Redfearn. Ian deconverted over 12 years ago. Since then he has continued to obsess over his deconversion. He is still asking the why? and how? questions. Ian is concerned with the deep questions of life and continuing to find ways to make meaning.
Ian has experienced the full force of the chaotic world we live in. His 24-year-old son has Cystic Fibrosis which is particularly frightening during an airborne pandemic. His father is experiencing Alzheimer’s Disease. All of this is happening during the time of Covid 19.
In spite of the difficulties of life, Ian has a joy and a sense of purpose. He is a committed father, husband, son, and community member. He takes time to wonder at the beauty in the world. He recognizes that relationships are what give us our most valued meaning in life.
He is now attending the Manchester Sunday Assembly and becoming an active member of the Secular community.
Links Facebook
https://www.facebook.com/ian.redfearn1/
Sunday Assembly Manchester
https://www.facebook.com/sunassemblymcr
Zoom 11 am (GMT) Sunday mornings https://zoom.us/j/2472709402
What is your favorite #DeconversionSong? Music is important to Ian and it influenced his deconversion and how he talks and feels about it now. See the full show notes link below to find Ian's deconversion-related musical recommendations including Spotify and YouTube links.
Use the hashtag #DeconversionSong to tell us your favorite deconversion song.
Interact Full Show Notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/03/21/?gaid=gap65ian-redfearn-meaning-making/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/?gaid=gap65
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/?gaid=gap65
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Leah Helbling. Leah is the host of the Women Beyond Faith podcast and an incredibly important voice in the secular community. Leah has a long history of secular community building. Post-deconversion she started a chapter of Women Beyond Belief. She now is a team leader of Bart Campolo‘s Cincinnati Caravan. “Leah is often referred to as ‘The Great Connector‘”
Leah and I discuss the gift of being present when someone tells their deconversion story. Leah shares her deconversion story which includes overcoming the purity culture and complementarianism of Evangelicalism. It also includes the unwelcoming atmosphere in the secular community for women and what she is doing about it. We talk about podcasting and what motivates us to do the work. Finally, we talk about building secular community.
Links Women Beyond Faith
https://womenbeyondfaith.buzzsprout.com/
https://www.facebook.com/womenbeyondfaith
https://www.instagram.com/womenbeyondfaith/
Cincinnati Caravan
https://www.cincinnaticaravan.org/
Recovering From Religion
https://www.recoveringfromreligion.org/
Search for secular community on meetup.com
https://www.meetup.com/
Interact Full show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/03/14/leah-helbling-women-beyond-faith/?gaid=gap64
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/?gaid=gap64
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/?gaid=gap64
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Anna Hummel. Anna became a Christian at 16 after growing up in a nominal culturally German Christian home. She was attracted to the community, the love of the people and the sense of belonging. Before long she found herself at a Youth With A Mission Discipleship Training School where things were a bit more intense.
At DTS Anna began to have Adverse Religious Experiences. The cumulative stress and lack of privacy began to wear on her. She had trauma around the fear of Hell both for her loved ones and for herself. It was not until she got home and experienced the Secular Grace of her non-Christian friends, that she recognized the harm she was experiencing and the loss of her normally care-free attitude.
Today Anna has compassion, understanding and Secular Grace for those who succumb to the peer pressure of conformity to the group. She wants people to experience the freedom from religious trauma that she now thrives in.
Links Secular Therapy Project
https://www.seculartherapy.org/
Religious Trauma Institute
https://www.religioustraumainstitute.com/
Interact Deconversion How To
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/?gaid=gap63
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/secular-grace/?gaid=gap63
You are not broken, you are human
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/12/06/you-are-not-broken-you-are-human/?gaid=gap63
Full show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/03/07/anna-hummel-ywam-dts-deconversion/?gaid=gap63
Attribution "You Are Not Alone" image
Anna Hummel
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
https://makaihbeats.net/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Brian Blais, professor at Bryant University and IBNS, Brown University. He is the author of A Measure of Faith – Probability in Religious Thought and Statistical Inference For Everyone. Brian is an expert in Bayes’ Theorem and how it applies to philosophy, theology, and apologetics.
In this episode, I take the restraints off myself and express the reasons why I think apologetics is faulty. Brian is the perfect guest for this. We bounce ideas off one another to articulate good epistemology. We discuss how mathematics and Bayes can be abused by injecting unstated information which changes the probabilities and ultimately the conclusions one comes to.
We also discuss how beliefs have consequences. The current rash of conspiracy theories has had real-world effects. Brian explains how decision theory can be used to make difficult choices.
Links Brian’s website
https://bblais.github.io/
https://twitter.com/bblais
Statistical Inference For Everyone (Free Version)
https://bblais.github.io/posts/2019/Jan/14/stats-for-everyone/
Amazon Version
https://amzn.to/2O2onzQ
A Measure of Faith: Probability in Religious Thought
https://amzn.to/37QzEKt
Bayes’ Theorem
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bayes%27_theorem
The Monty Hall Problem
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monty_Hall_problem
Interact Full Show Notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/02/28/brian-blais-bayes-vs-apologetics/?gaid=gap62
Deconversion How To
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Critique of Apologetics
https://gracefulatheist.com/critique-of-apologetics/
Apologetics Epistemology and Moving On
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/10/02/apologetics-epistemology-and-moving-on/
Previous episodes referred to in this episode
https://gracefulatheist.com/2020/10/04/randal-rauser-conversation-with-my-inner-atheist/
https://gracefulatheist.com/2020/11/01/ian-mills-new-testament-review/
https://gracefulatheist.com/2020/11/15/barrett-evans-the-contemplative-skeptic/
Attribution
Transition Music and Dawg Biscuits on the moon
John Monson and the Brothers Galaxy
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/<
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CG grew up in strict religious home in Nigeria, where everything was banned except
Christian media. His family was heavily influenced by the Pentecostal Word-Of-
Faith/Prosperity movement. CG attended a tyrannical, authoritarian, and punitive college in Nigeria.
CG, later on, moved to London, UK. In London, he saw that the world was bigger than
the Christian bubble that he had been raised in his whole life. He attended a popular
charismatic church where he met people from different cultures, beliefs, and denominations.
However, some of his friends challenged his Word-Of-Faith/Prosperity beliefs. He started
theological beliefs started changing as a result.
CG, subsequently, moved to the USA to get a graduate degree at a Christian college. He
lived in the American south where, as an immigrant, he felt isolated and disconnected from the
Christian culture around him. This drove him to a personal intellectual journey, where he spent
hours reading books, listening to podcasts, and watching videos.
After graduating with his master’s degree, CG came to the point where he could not
ignore the damage that Christianity was inflicting on his mental health and personal
development. He realised that he had to choose between completely losing his sanity &
freedom by remaining a slave to religion or abandoning his beliefs and accepting his
freedom/autonomy. A few days later, he became an Agnostic, and, subsequently, an Atheist.
CG has been on the path of freedom, healing, and recovery ever since. He is
deconstructing sexual shame, self-hatred, misogyny, white supremacy, colonization, and
western imperialism (and other forms of injustice). He also seeks to heal the havoc that religion
has inflicted in Nigeria (and other African countries) through evangelism, cultural imperialism,
and colonization. Religion, significantly, contributes to the apathy and passivity of Nigerians,
which prevents them from fighting for their freedom and justice.
CG is very passionate about humanism. He believes humanism is what our generation
needs to help make the world (especially Africa) a better place. He is an existential humanist, a
cosmopolitan humanist, and a planetary humanist. He believes that humanists need to have
freedom (autonomy), humility, compassion, hope, love for learning, curiosity, and open-
mindedness.
Links African Polymath Blog
https://africanpolymath.wordpress.com/
https://twitter.com/AfricanPolymath
Reading list and resources
https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/193EJcKRNIxAftLb6daW9f_blMaJ2QwrQ?usp=sharing
AfricanPolymath@gmail.com
Interact Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.com/deconversion/?gaid=gap61
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/secular-grace/?gaid=gap61
Graceful Atheist Podcast
https://gracefulatheist.com/podcast/?gaid=gap61
Attribution**"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support**
My guest this week is Troy Moore-Heart. Troy grew up in an Evangelical family in Texas and described his childhood self as a “true-believing born-again Christian” who was baptized by his father at 6 in his grandmother’s church. Troy experienced religious trauma, the natural childhood fears given the purported reality of a spiritual realm all around him. Later in life, when he acknowledged his sexuality he “fervently believed [he] was going to hell.” When he eventually came out to his family he needed to put up healthy boundaries.
Troy started to call himself an agnostic and not an atheist for fear of losing his relationship with his family. After marrying as an adult, he came to terms with his religious trauma and anti-queer shame. He discovered secular humanism as “an ideological and moral home.”
Today, troy calls himself a progressive humanist, and he is focused on transformative justice. He is becoming a humanist celebrant. He supports projects like the Southern Poverty Law Center’s Y’all Means All and the Trevor Project. Troy also supports the thriving secular therapy community that is growing around trauma-informed therapy, including the Religious Trauma Institute and the Reclamation Collective.
Troy requests that you consider signing the Southern Poverty Law Center’s “Y’all Means All” pledge. “It’s become a galvanizing slogan to promote LGBTQ inclusion and advocacy in rural Southern communities.”
Links Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/troy.moore.heart/
Y’all Means All
http://www.yallmeansall.com
The Trevor Project
https://www.thetrevorproject.org/
Religious Trauma Institute
https://www.religioustraumainstitute.com/
Reclamation Collective
https://www.reclamationcollective.com/
American Humanist Association
https://americanhumanist.org/
Interact Full show notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/02/14/troy-moore-heart-yall-means-all/
Deconversion How To
https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
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My guest this week is Meir-Simchah. Meir-Simchah Panzer lives in Jerusalem with his wife and their four children. He co-hosts the podcasts Two Christians And A Jew, with Frank M. Taylor and Dr. Jennifer Brown Jones, where the team dives into how Christians and Jews read the Hebrew Scriptures differently and what difference it makes for our lives, and the Artifact Podcast with Nachliel Selavan where ordinary objects become portals into the history, ideas, and existential mystery behind them. Formerly, he co-hosted Holy Madness – The Show, with Tzvi Zucker. Meir-Simchah is a student of Rabbi Matis Weinberg. He is a co-founder and executive at Ohalecha Arts and Events Center; he writes essays, poems, and stories; and he teaches the Hebrew language and Hebrew Scriptures for individuals and groups.
Meir and I discuss his work on Two Christians and Jew, how he interacts with the Christians, what he actually thinks about Jesus and the NT, and the influence of secular Judaism on secular humanism.
Links Two Christians and a Jew
http://twochristiansandajew.com/
https://twitter.com/MeirSimchah
Two Christians and a Jew discussion group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/215152216739045
Artifact page
https://www.facebook.com/ArtifactPodcast
Artifact discussion group
https://www.facebook.com/groups/397213411493038
Email meirsimchah@gmail.com.
Interact Full show notes and book recommendations
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/02/07/meir-simchah-on-orthodox-judaism/
Rate and Review the Graceful Atheist Podcast
Podchaser: https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/graceful-atheist-podcast-1136736
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Attribution “Waves” track written and produced by Makaih Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
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My returning guest this week is Alice Greczyn. Alice has written a new memoir called Wayward: Spiritual Warfare & Sexual Purity. In it, Alice tells the harrowing story of growing up in an Evangelical family that attempted to live by faith. They moved from place to place believing the “Lord would provide.” Alice describes it as being “homeless.”
Alice came of age under the oppressive sexual and purity mores of the “Kiss Dating Goodbye” era. She tells the story of being shamed while on a mission trip to India for being “flirty.”
As an adult in her 20s, in a desperate but final act of faith, Alice tests God. God fails. And Alice begins the difficult process of letting go of faith. This is a dark time of panic attacks, depression, and self-harm.
With the help of secular therapy and the discovery of the term, Religious Trauma Syndrome, Alice began her recovery process. She studied the science of faith, neurotheology, and began to understand herself and those around her who still believed. In this new freedom, she rebuilt her life reclaiming her autonomy and discovering what real love feels like.
On top of being an author, Alice is an advocate for those questioning their faith. Her organization, Dare to Doubt, is a resource for those who are no longer satisfied with their faith tradition’s explanations and demands.
Links Wayward: Spiritual Warfare & Sexual Purity
Limited supply of signed copies
https://www.alicegreczyn.com/wayward-limited-signed-copy
Amazon
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1632993546/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=1632993546&linkCode=as2&tag=gracefula-20&linkId=cce5b264f1fe651344a691f03654a7f5
Dare To Doubt
https://www.daretodoubt.org/
Interact Alice’s first appearance on the Graceful Atheist Podcast
https://gracefulatheist.com/2019/07/25/alice-greczyn-dare-to-doubt/
Full Show Notes
https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/01/31/alice-greczyn-wayward/
Rate and Review
https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/graceful-atheist-podcast-1136736
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Logan Thomas who blogs at Beyond Belief. Logan interned at St. Andrews, a famous church in the UK. He went on to Bible college and eventually perused a Master’s degree in theology where he studied biblical studies, biblical languages, history and textual criticism where he began to question.
After discovering his sexuality, Logan came out during his internship at St. Andrews. He discusses coming out twice. He started with a more progressive view on homosexuality. But between the Church’s stances and the biblical texts, he realized these things could not be reconciled. We discuss the differences between UK and US churches handling of the LGBTQ community.
Logan cares about the truth. As he was deconstructing what he believed about the bible based on what he was being taught at Bible college he came to a point where he could no longer believe. Logan tells his story with a great deal of honesty and self-reflection on his former faith.
Now Logan has a social media presence where he blogs and creates videos asking questions about faith and doubt.
Links Beyond Belief Blog
https://www.beyondbelief-blog.com/
https://twitter.com/itsbeyondbelief
https://www.instagram.com/its_beyondbelief/
YouTube
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCw-jiLmRFSpxKuSldp7bzEQ/
Interact Full Show Notes
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2021/01/24/logan-beyond-belief/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
A Humanist Podcast
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/podcast/
Rate and Review the Graceful Atheist Podcast
Podchaser: https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/graceful-atheist-podcast-1136736
Attribution"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Erin. Erin is working toward her chaplaincy and her Master's degree in Practical Theology. She describes herself as “religious, but not spiritual.”
Erin grew up in Northern Ireland. She was raised to respect all people. But when she was accepted by an Evangelical Presbyterian church she became in her words “the worst kind of fundamentalist.” This included deriding Catholics.
At University she excelled and found herself attracted to more liberal theologies. She says she went from Evangelical to an Open Theist to a functional atheist (agnostic).
Erin also happens to be on the Autism spectrum. This had an impact on her inability to accept things on faith. She needed logical consistency.
But Erin still finds value in the Christian tradition. She plans to do good in the world as a chaplain.
Links and recommendations Doubts and Loves by Richard Holloway
https://www.amazon.com/Doubts-Loves-What-Christianity-Canons/dp/1786893924/
Autism Faith Network
https://autismfaithnetwork.com
Autism Pastor
https://autismpastor.com/
Interact Full Show Notes https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2021/01/17/erin-religious-but-not-spiritual/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Humanist Podcast
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/podcast/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Rate and Review the Graceful Atheist Podcast
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Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s show is a Deconversion Anonymous episode.
My guest this week is James. James is a former missionary to Haiti who was a part of the Pentecostal and Charismatic traditions. James took his Christianity very seriously and was sensitive to God speaking in his life.
Through a series of realizations and life difficulties, James began to doubt what he had been taught about God matched reality. Later, exploring psychology he realized the cognitive biases and connotative dissonance he had lived under.
James describes himself as more “emotional.” His story is an important one representing the way Christianity can play on emotions and “works” until real tragedy strikes.
Special thanks to Mike T. for editing this episode.
Links ExChristian Recovery
https://www.reddit.com/r/exchristianrecovery/
Secular Therapy Project
https://www.seculartherapy.org/
Interact Full show notes
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2021/01/10/james-deconversion-anonymous/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Rate and Review the Graceful Atheist Podcast
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A secular humanist podcast: Graceful Atheist Podcast
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/podcast/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
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My guest this week is Jon Steingard, the lead singer and guitarist for Hawk Nelson. In late spring of 2020, Jon posted a gut-wrenching confession on Instagram that he no longer believed in God. He is one of the more prominent recent high profile deconverts. Jon risked more than most by publicly acknowledging his lack of faith as his career was tied to the Christian music world. This confession and the public discussion of his loss of faith has and will continue to have reverberations throughout the Christian community for some time.
Jon has made himself widely available to honestly and vulnerably tell his story both to the Christian community and to the atheist humanist communities. It is Jon’s honest seeking after truth and his willingness to respectfully engage apologists and other prominent Christians that are having such a large impact. He has become a safe person for others in the Christian world to discuss their doubts.
In my conversation with Jon, he describes a major turning point in his life when he saw poverty, starvation, and abandonment of the Batwa children and community in Uganda. This began a quite reasonable time of questioning: if God is all-powerful, all-knowing, and good, why are the Batwa suffering?
In January of 2021, Jon started a podcast and YouTube channel called The Wonder and Mystery of Being.
Links
https://www.instagram.com/jonsteingard/
Confession of his lack of belief
https://www.instagram.com/p/CAbHm10lt7w/
The Wonder and The Mystery of Being podcast
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCUjFcPl10_QMxoevHL4jLXg
https://twitter.com/jonsteingard
Response to Brian Houston
https://twitter.com/jonsteingard/status/1313552919661342725
Interact
Full show notes with quotes from the episodehttps://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2021/01/03/jon-steingard-the-wonder-and-the-mystery-of-being/
Deconversion from Christianity
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Jennifer Michael Hecht’s Doubt: A History
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2019/05/16/jennifer-michael-hecht-doubt-a-history/
Clergy Project
https://clergyproject.org/
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Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
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My guest this week is my wife, Michelle. Though I have deconverted from Christianity, Michelle is very much a dedicated Christian. We still love each other and we are making it work in an “unequally yoked” relationship. We have an honest conversation about how we got to now and how we go forward in the future.
Michelle does work that is social work adjacent. She is a better practicing humanist than I am. I admire her for who she is as a person. I admire her for the work she does. And, yes, I admire her for her faith.
We sit down at our kitchen table for an honesty contest. You can hear the love, but you can also hear the tension and the hurt. We discuss how we met, how we have “deconstructed” over the years, when I told her I could no longer believe, and how we are making it work “unequally yoked.”
In this episode, we respond to listener questions about our loving relationship when one of us believes and the other does not. Send in your questions for a potential future episode with Michelle and me.
Links
Unequally Yoked verse 2 Corinthians 6:14 – 15
https://www.bible.com/bible/107/2CO.6.14-15.NET
Recovery From Religion has a resource page with a section entitled: Spouses/ Partners With Mixed Belief Systems (from a secular perspective) https://www.recoveringfromreligion.org/religious-resources
Unequally Yoked (from the Christian perspective)
https://thriveglobal.com/stories/what-does-it-mean-to-be-unequally-yoked/
Interact
Chosen Family Grace
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2020/11/14/chosen-family-grace/
Michelle and I discuss her listening to the Sarah: Believing Spouse of an Atheist Deconvert episode https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2019/12/12/sarah-believing-spouse-of-an-atheist-deconvert/
Full Show Notes
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2020/12/13/michelle-a-loving-unequally-yoked-relationship/
Rate and review the podcast
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Attribution
Photo Sneha ss, CC BY-SA 4.0 , via Wikimedia Commons
Music"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
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This week’s show is a Deconversion Anonymous episode.
My guest this week is Colin. Colin absorbed his mother’s Evangelical Christianity. He has mostly good memories of the people in church. He bounced from his mother’s to his father’s families never quite fitting in. He hung on to his Christianity long after he recognized it no longer brought him “positive results” out of fear of losing everything: salvation, community, and identity.
My first and only real religion is inclusion.
Colin’s doubts began young with a dynamic Sunday school teacher who was not allowed to preach in church and a gay uncle he was not supposed to approve of. Colin recognized that love demands inclusion. He felt it was his moral obligation to be inclusive.
In his late twenties, in therapy, he experienced true acceptance. Even while he was explaining to his therapist he was still a virgin, having been a part of the purity culture of the ’90s.
Colin’s story takes a dramatic turn of self-discovery. He discovers himself and discovers his voice. He then experienced more acceptance telling his story of recovering from growing up Evangelical to non-christian audiences. Colin tells his story with rawness, honesty and a great deal of humor.
Interact Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/deconversion/
Colin mentions a post I wrote on apologetcis: What If I Grant That
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2016/11/26/what-if-i-grant-you-that/
Colin mentions my friend Bryce interviewing me
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2020/06/26/bryce-harrington-interviews-the-graceful-atheist/
Full show notes
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2020/11/29/colin-deconversion-anonymous/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Barrett Evans, author of The Contemplative Skeptic. Barrett wrote the book for those who are skeptical but drawn to spirituality. A former evangelical seminarian and ex-Roman Catholic, Barrett is an agnostic who has retained a fascination with contemplative spirituality. Building on what he learned in his divinity, counseling, and historical studies, he draws on hundreds of religious and secular sources in an effort to combine honest doubt with the best of contemplative experience. It is proper to doubt.
We discuss how honesty and humility lead to doubt. Barrett’s look at comparative religion reveals the reasons for doubt and the wisdom of a contemplative life. We ask what does it mean to be “spiritual.”
The tremendous range of religious diversity is one of the greatest reasons for skepticism towards any particular religious belief.
Links The Contemplative Skeptic https://www.amazon.com/Contemplative-Skeptic-Spirituality-Non-Religious-Unorthodox-ebook/dp/B085W7F7WB/ Barrett’s website https://www.americannone.com/ Honest Doubt https://www.americannone.com/post/doubt-and-the-good-life Twitter https://twitter.com/ContemplativeS4 Interact Secular Humanist Graces Thanksgiving secular grace sayings https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/secular-grace/ Steps to deconversion https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Critique of Apologetics https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/critique-of-apologetics/ Full show notes https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2020/11/15/barrett-evans-the-contemplative-skeptic/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Ian Mills, a PhD candidate in New Testament studies at Duke University. His dissertation is “Rewriting the Gospel: Second Century Evangelists and the Act of Gospel Writing.” His key advisor is Mark Goodacre and Bart Ehrman is on his dissertation committee.
Ian is a professing Christian who confesses the resurrection of Jesus. I ask Ian to provide intellectual cover for believers. His example is one of honesty and intellectual integrity while maintaining faith. What makes him interesting is his commitment to methodological naturalism as it applies to studying the first and second century gospel writings. He explains why even as a believer this is not threatening to his faith.
Ian is the co-host of the New Testament Review Podcast. He and his co-host Laura Robinson rose to internet fame (at least in secular circles) after they did an episode giving an unflattering review of Lee Strobel’s “A Case For Christ.” Ian’s approach is a breath of fresh air particularly when compared to popular apologetics.
What [popular apologists] do is bad for you. And it is because it is a complete inversion of what people of integrity and what good science inquiry should be.
Instead of starting with questions and data and going and looking for explanations that satisfy your questions, they start with a set of conclusions and go mining the evidence looking for that.
I personally learned a lot from Ian in this conversation. He is a wealth of information and expertise on the early Church and the process of gospel writing and canonization. As I say in the interview, I felt transported back to the best of Bible college. I suspect we will be hearing from Ian for years to come.
Links New Testament Review Podcast
https://soundcloud.com/user-829560134
YouTube
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCR8SeIgZf4x0-wUMWVvWchw
Academia
https://duke.academia.edu/IanMills
https://twitter.com/IanNelsonMills
Interact I mention Ted Chiang’s Hell is the Absence of God
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2017/06/04/review-hell-is-the-absence-of-god/
Critique of Apologetics
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/critique-of-apologetics/
Full show notes
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2020/11/01/ian-mills-new-testament-review/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Suandria Hall. Suandria is a trauma informed counselor specializing in faith transitions. Her practice, My Choice My Power, is online and she offers mental health counseling to residents in Colorado and life coaching sessions online, by phone, and email for anyone.
Suandria tells her story of being groomed for ministry in a very Charismatic community with rigorous honesty. In her early adulthood she began to question and eventually deconverted. She had a positive experience with a therapist who “held space” for her shifting faith positions. She then went on to become a secular counselor to help others through the same process.
We talk about the power of parents to influence children. And the damage that can occur when parents pass that responsibility on to an invisible god.
Her approach to counseling is trauma informed and acknowledges Adverse Religious Experiences and religious trauma. She helps people going through the process of deconstruction and deconversion while being open to all faith positions.
Links Suandria’s Counseling Site
https://www.mychoicemypower.com/
https://twitter.com/mychoicemypower
https://www.instagram.com/mychoicemypowercounseling/
Interact Adverse Religious Experiences series
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/category/adverse-religious-experiences/
Steps of Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Full show notes
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2020/10/18/suandria-hall-my-choice-my-power/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Randal Rauser. Randal is, in his own words, “a systematic and analytic theologian of evangelical persuasion.” He is a professor of systematic theology, apologetics, and worldview at Taylor Seminary.
Randal has written a number of books on apologetics and atheism. I first became aware of Randal’s work around 2017 when I read “Is The Atheist My Neighbor.” At least in the circles, I am a part of, Randal is considered to be a fair and honest apologist and is widely regarded for “steel-manning” atheist arguments before giving his arguments against them.
This week we discuss his new book, “Conversations With My Inner Atheist.” In this book, Randal personifies his doubts as an interlocutor named Mia, My Inner Atheist, who presents the atheist, humanist and naturalistic arguments against his faith. Randal shows real vulnerability in several of these dialogues and often leaves the matter without a satisfactory conclusion by either party (believing Randal or non-believing, Mia).
As you might imagine, I have some thoughts on these matters most of which I express in the Final Thoughts section of the podcast. We also discuss a recent back and forth between Randal and Ian Mills of the New Testament Review Podcast fame on the topic of methodological naturalism.
Links Blog
https://randalrauser.com/
https://twitter.com/RandalRauser
YouTube
https://www.youtube.com/user/RDRauser
Books Conversations With My Inner Atheist
https://www.amazon.com/Conversations-Inner-Atheist-Christian-Apologist-ebook/dp/B08G4ZWLY7/
Is The Atheist My Neighbor
https://www.amazon.com/Atheist-Neighbor-Rethinking-Christian-Attitudes-ebook/dp/B0118FX8E0/
Interact My Critique of Apologetics
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/critique-of-apologetics/
Full Show Notes including links to the Randal and Ian methodological naturalism discussions
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/?p=5839
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s show is a Deconversion Anonymous episode.
My guest this week is Jimmy. As early as the beginning of 2020 Jimmy was still in the closet trying to determine how he would come out as an atheist and humanist. By mid February he had told his family and was bracing for his church to find out. Jimmy was a serious and dedicated Christian drawn to Calvinism by family and the intellectual rigor.
As the years went by and his attempts at self-betterment were not realized he began to be drawn by the pragmatism of Stoicism. He eventually realized that counseling would be beneficial, though this had so far been off the table. Through these active measures he began to see some success at self-betterment.
Jimmy’s chief concern was not damaging the relationships with his believing friends and family. He was very careful to show them he loved them and had no contempt for their faith.
"It is one of these things where I think, this has got to be a band-aide I am ripping off and not a cancer I am injecting into my family. And I am going to do my darnedest to make sure that this works and that they know I love them."
For the full show notes including Jimmy's book recommendations and quotes from jimmy:
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2020/09/20/jimmy-deconversion-anonymous/
Interact Deconversion How To
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Image Attribution
*"memento Mori, 'To This Favour' by William Michael Harnett" by Bob Ramsak is licensed with CC BY-NC-ND 2.0.
To view a copy of this license, visit https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/2.0/*
Audio Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s show is a Deconversion Anonymous episode.
My guest this week is Ray Gilford. Ray grew up more of a cultural Christian. His family believed but did not push him. In college, without community and looking for friendship predatory evangelism took advantage of him. Ray worked hard at being a Christian but wanted something deeper. He learned Hebrew and Greek in an effort to find “True Christianity.” He remained a Christian for 32 years.
Eventually, he deconverted realizing that Christianity did not live up to its promise. Ray now says he practices Pagan, metaphysics and spiritualism. Though this is a different path than most of my guests what is interesting about Ray’s metaphysics is that id does not preclude miracles and yet Ray still found Christianity wanting.
Interact Deconversion Anonymous
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/category/podcast/deconversion-anonymous/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/deconversion/
Deconversion How To
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Dr. Anthony Pinn. Dr. Pinn is the Agnes Cullen Arnold Professor of Humanities, the Professor of Religious Studies. the Founding Director of the Center for Engaged Research and Collaborative Learning Rice University, and the Director of Research of the Institute for Humanist Studies. Dr. Pinn has written a number of books on the intersection of humanism and race. In this episode, we discuss his book, When Colorblindness Isn’t the Answer.
I learned quite a lot from Dr. Pinn. Both about humanism and the experience of black humanists. Ultimately I was challenged to change my behavior, to “do my homework,” and to understand that it will take dismantling of white supremacy in humanist communities in order to gain the great benefits that diversity brings. "We can do better."
This sort of fundamental change this movement towards diversity and equity means giving up comfort.
You cannot request comfort and say you are interested in change
Throughout his book(s) and in the interview Dr. Pinn calls on our humanist values to be less ignorant, to include black and other historically disparaged voices, and to develop our own vocabulary and ways of experiencing awe without calling on theistic traditions.
Links Website
https://www.anthonypinn.com/
https://twitter.com/anthony_pinn
Books
https://www.anthonypinn.com/books
When Colorblindness Isn’t The Answer
https://www.amazon.com/When-Colorblindness-Isnt-Answer-Challenge-ebook/dp/B06XXM1MWR/
Interact Critique of Apologetics
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/critique-of-apologetics/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/deconversion/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/secular-grace/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Joel Furches. Joel is a psychologist researching topics of religion. He has a BA in psychology an MA in education, and he is working on his PhD in Behavioral Analysis. He he has focused on conversions and deconversions and has written a well researched article entitled: Why Do Christians Become Atheists? A Case Study.
Joel and I discuss his research and walk through his model of deconversion. We discuss the “Market place of ideas” and “The Christian Bubble.” We define the terms disaffiliation, deconstruction and deconversion.
Joel’s advice for Christians who are seeing more deconversions:
[What] I would say to Christians in general is that it is not their responsibility to re-covert [the deconvert].
They have not failed because this person deconverted and they will probably not succeed in re-converting them.
It is to respect the person who has deconverted, respect their experience. Give them the right that any other human being would have which is to defend their views. And interact or engage in those views as important.
Links Joel’s Website:
https://joelfurches.com/
Switching Sides
FB: https://www.facebook.com/groups/416964269222311
Twitter: https://twitter.com/SidesSwitching
Why Do Christians Become Atheists? A Case Study
https://hubpages.com/politics/Why-do-Christians-Become-Atheists-A-Case-Study
Perez, S. and Vallières, F., 2019. How Do Religious People Become Atheists? Applying a Grounded Theory Approach to Propose a Model of Deconversion.Secularism and Nonreligion
http://doi.org/10.5334/snr.108
Interact Deconversion How To
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Leighann Lord, comedian, author and podcast host. She has traveled the world doing comedy and has been on VH1, Comedy Central and HBO. She has co-hosted on Neil Degrasse Tyson’s Start Talk Radio and on CFI’s podcast, Point of Inquiry. She hosts her own podcast, People With Parents. She has written two books: Dict Jokes and Real Women Do It Standing Up.
Leighann went to Catholic school growing up and is now a humanist activist. Leighann was awarded the 2019 Humanist Arts Award for her work as the New York City face of the African Americans for Humanism outreach campaign sponsored by the Center for Inquiry.
We talk about humanism and what it can add to the conversation about race in America. Leighann handles my naivete with grace and elegance while still pointing out the world is a complicated place and racism is a persistent problem in America.
"[This] is humanism.
Human beings trying to be better humans.
Actually doing the work."
Leighann’s podcast, People With Parents, deals with the role reversal of taking care of elderly parents. It is also a raw and real look at grieving the death of parent. We discuss secular grief and the need to be more public about grief as non-believers.
We geek out about comedy and how it can let truth sneak past our defense mechanisms. Leighann shares her top five comedic influences. She talks about first seeing Marsha Warfield on stage, “I didn’t know we did this. Which tells you the power of role models.”
Leighann’s comedy specials which are available on YouTube, Spotify, Pandora and Amazon Prime have much to say about living in 2020 though they were recorded a few years ago. They cover race, religion, sexism, sex, wealth disparity, and the lack of education in the current administration.
Links Website
http://www.VeryFunnyLady.com
https://www.instagram.com/leighannlord/
https://twitter.com/leighannlord
People With Parents Podcast
http://www.veryfunnylady.com/people-with-parents-podcast
YouTube
http://youtube.com/c/LeighannLordComedy
Books
http://tinyurl.com/LeighannsBooks
Interact Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Bart Campolo. Bart is the host of the Humanize Me Podcast. He is the author of “Why I Left, Why I Stayed.” Along with his famous Evangelical father, Tony Campolo, Bart is the subject of John Wright’s documentary: Leaving my Father’s Faith. If that is not enough, Bart is also the Humanist Chaplain at the University of Cincinnati.
Bart and I discuss graceful ways of talking with people with whom we disagree, having conversations that are difficult that touch on religion, race and politics and changing one’s mind. I point out that Bart has been particularly public with some of these conversations, including a book and documentary with his dad, Tony Campolo, a podcast episode with his son, Roman, where they disagree on the hope or lack thereof for our species and a recent podcast episode on race. In short, Bart wears his heart on his sleeve and lives his life out loud with humility, honesty and grace.
We discuss humanism and the burden of being hopeful. Bart pushes back on my assertion that everyone needs awe, belonging and community. According to Bart different people need different amounts of each of those things. At the same time, Bart is facilitating a healthy secular community in Cincinnati providing just those things for the lucky few who attend. They put it this way:
- Commitment to loving relationships
- Making things better for other people
- Cultivating gratitude and wonder in life
- Worldview humility
I normally have a few quotes from the episode, but as I was writing them down it became a transcript. Bart is eminently quotable. Listen to the show to find out. I will leave you with just one which you will need to listen to the show to understand:
Show your work!
Be sure to listen to the end for a funny story I tell that relates to Bart’s father, Tony Campolo, during my time at bible college.
Links Website
https://bartcampolo.org/
Podcast
https://bartcampolo.org/humanizeme
Documentary
https://campolofilm.com/
Book
https://bartcampolo.org/why-i-left-why-i-stayed
Interact Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Bryce Harrington. Bryce and I have been colleagues off and on at a couple of different companies over the years. But most importantly he and I had a seminal discussion back in 2012 while killing time in an airport. At the time I was a dedicated Evangelical Christian and Bryce has been a life long atheist. Even though I had an ulterior motive at the time Bryce was kind, gracious and genuinely curious as he wanted to understand how and why I believed. As you will hear, ironically, my former believing self changed Bryce’s view of religious people.
Fast forward to today, I told Bryce I had deconverted last year. He was shocked and amazed and wanted to understand how I had changed my mind and why I was doing the podcast. This turned out to be a really fun and interesting conversation that I am glad to be able to share with you. We did not pre-plan the questions. What you hear is Bryce’s genuine curiosity. He may have a career in podcast interviews.
We also get to hear Bryce’s story. The isolation and loneliness he felt growing up the only non-believer in his community. That sense of isolation lasted for much of Bryce’s life. I think many of you who are life long atheists or who have just recently deconverted will be able to relate.
Interact Hell is the Absence of God (thought experiment)
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2017/06/04/review-hell-is-the-absence-of-god/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/deconversion/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is John Marriott. We are talking about deconversion from the Christian perspective. John is the Director of Global Learning and teaches in the department of Philosophy of Religion and Ethics at Biola University. John did his PhD dissertation focused on deconversion from Christianity to atheism. He has written a book on deconversion called “A Recipe For Disaster,” which is directed to the Church on the ways they are setting up believers to lose their faith.
I define [faith] as having enough reasons for a hope worth acting on.
I think there enough reasons for me to act on this [faith].
I first came across John’s work in an interview he did with Randal Rauser. I was struck by the honesty and clarity that he had in describing deconversion. In particular this quote:
Something similar underwrites a significant percentage of deconversions. The biblical narrative that once easily fit within their childlike understanding of reality began to get squeezed out as they matured in their understanding of reality. The stories in the Bible about miracles, witches, giants, demons, etc. began to feel as out of place as Santa. To resolve the problems they may seek answers that will allow them to continue to believe in such things as adults in the 21st century. This is the experience not just of those who deconvert but all educated, reflective Christians today. I suspect that even for those that do remain Christians, the cognitive dissonance never completely goes away, it just has been reduced to a level that allows them to continue to believe. For deconverts however, the cognitive dissonance is not sufficiently assuaged by apologetics. It grows despite their efforts and reaches a tipping point. As in the case with Santa, the only way to resolve the tension is to admit what they know is true. God does not exist.
John proved to be as honest in person as he is in his writing. He met me in an honesty contest and we found points of agreement on what it is like to deconvert. Even though we disagree on the conclusions we were able to have a vital conversation.
Links Website
https://www.johnmarriott.org/
A Recipe For Disaster book
https://www.johnmarriott.org/a-recipe-for-disaster
Randal Rauser interview
https://www.christianpost.com/voice/the-problem-of-christians-becoming-atheists.html
Interact Deconversion and How to Deconvert
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/deconversion/
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Richard Swan. Richard grew up Catholic, became an Anglican and then moved on to Pentecostalism. He was a worship leader and an active member of the Christian music scene including touring as Graham Kendrick‘s choir director.
He began to notice that regardless of his person life the people responded in worship under his leadership. This began his questioning which eventually led to his deconversion.
Post-deconversion, Richard is now the director of London City Voices, a non-religious community choir. Richard has figured out how to use his passion for music to build a secular community. In our conversation, we talk about the power of music to bring people together, how it can be manipulated and what it takes to be a community builder.
Links Website
https://www.londoncityvoices.co.uk/
YouTube
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCCE7166Y1HBO7_lh7_yjE4g
https://twitter.com/LondonCityVoice
https://www.facebook.com/groups/412432238841455/
Interact Deconversion How To
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s guest is Amy Logan. Amy is the podcast host of Exmormonology. She is a certified life coach who helps people through exiting Mormonism, deconstructing and thriving in a post-faith life.
Amy was the perfect Mormon girl. She did everything right. She attended BYU. She was married in the Temple. When she discovered a book covering the full history of Mormonism she began to have doubts. Until she had what she describes as the “moment,” sitting in her car crying her eyes out with the realization that she could no longer call herself a Mormon.
If the church is true, it has nothing to fear,
and I get to figure this out.
It was at that moment I gave myself permission.
She continued on for a while trying to maintain some semblance of belief. She tried to “hang on to Jesus.” But eventually that crumbled too.
Today, Amy helps those who have also left the Mormon church live full and healthy lives. Exmormonology is not just for those who have left Mormonism, it is for anyone who has gone through a faith transition.
I knew life is never going to be the same.
But I didn’t know that it could be better at that point.
Links Amy’s website:
https://amyloganlife.com/
Exmormonology podcast:
https://amyloganlife.com/category/podcast/
Twitter:
https://twitter.com/amyloganlife
Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/amyloganlife/
YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCWLNS7aHLgQ6UaiJVX8yrDw
Truman Show: ending clip:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gn5kuDdeGzs
Interact Deconversion How To:
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Attribution
“Waves” track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
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My guest this week is Dr. Clint Heacock. Clint is the host of the Mindshift Podcast that focuses on reconstruction after deconstruction. Clint grew up in the Church of Christ with parents who followed the Bill Gothard method of child rearing. Clint now describes this as cultic practices.
What I need to do is discover the authentic Christianity
… and then I wasn’t able to do it.
After pursuing a PhD in Theology in the U.K. while teaching Clint began to recolonize the disparity between what he believed and what he was teaching. The problems with the bible became too much. At the time Clint was hosting a podcast called “Preacher’s Forum.” The content had become too radical for its audience. He then changed the podcast into Mindshift and as his listeners have told him, he began deconstructing in public.
Only when you physically remove yourself and
psychologically remove yourself,
that’s when you start to think critically.
Clint has has had a focus on cult studies, Christian Dominionism and Christian reconstruction where politics and religion meet. He has had various experts in these fields on his podcast.
Best advice: Get yourself educated
Most important Clint has a heart for people. Just because we no longer are religious does not mean we lose our sense of pastoral care.
Links Mindshift Podcast
http://mindshiftpodcast.co.uk/
Blog
https://medium.com/@clintheacock
https://medium.com/@clintheacock/leaving-christianity-is-a-lot-harder-than-it-looks-8930f532e41e
Interact Deconversion How To
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is David Johnson, the co-host and creator of the Skeptics and Seekers podcast and blog. David is a former Church of Christ member and a pastor’s kid. He was baptized at 7, leading the church in song at 7, preaching at 12, the youth leader at 15 and assistant minister at 21.
His deconversion process began as he examined the Church of Christ’s doctrine against musical accompaniment in worship. He says “the little things, were the big things.” And if the little things were wrong, what else might be wrong?
You know, I think we might be wrong about that [instrumental accompaniment].
And that was hard for me.
It was hard in a way that I am not going to be able to express.
For me, if we were wrong about musical instruments, we were wrong about everything.
Deconversion was “like death” for David.
Today David uses an unabashed polemic approach to counter-apologetics to reveal the problems with Christianity and faith in general. You can find him on his Skeptics and Seekers podcast and on his appearances on Justin Brierley’s Unbelievable? podcast. You can read the book he co-authored in response to Justin Brierley: Still Unbelievable!
Links Skeptics and Seekers blog
https://skepticsandseekers.squarespace.com/
Skeptics and Seekers podcast
https://anchor.fm/skeptics-and-seekers
Still Unbelievable! the book
https://reasonpress.net/SU1E
David Johnson’s appearances on Justin Brierley’s Unbelievable? podcast
https://www.premierchristianradio.com/Shows/Saturday/Unbelievable/Episodes/Unbelievable-Is-the-resurrection-unbelievable-Jonathan-McLatchie-vs-David-Johnson
https://www.premierchristianradio.com/Shows/Saturday/Unbelievable/Episodes/Unbelievable-Can-Justin-defend-his-own-book-feat.-David-Johnson-Andrew-Knight-Randal-Rauser
My recent appearance on Skeptics and Seekers
https://skepticsandseekers.squarespace.com/blog/x-tians-part-one-what-christians-who-stay-need-to-know-about-the-christians-who-dont
Interact Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s show is a Deconversion Anonymous episode.
My guest this week is Sarah. Sarah is a co-author of the book “Still Unbelievable!” She is a regular poster on the Unbelievable? discussion boards. Sarah has a unique blend of down to earth perspective and an intellectual rigor.
Sarah grew up a Christian. She was a part of the Shepherding Movement which is now considered a cult. She has moved from the Anglican church, to (British) Baptist, and then to Charismatic Vineyard churches. Until she began to research her own faith. What she found was an utter lack of evidence and a confusing morass of conflicting information.
She describes her search for validation as “going forensic” as she studied apologetics, philosophy, cosmology and evolution. Ultimately, she could not keep god on “life support” and she is now an agnostic.
Links
Reason Press and the Still Unbelievable! book
https://reasonpress.net/
“Sophie’s” Story
https://reasonpress.net/SU1E/Sophie1
https://reasonpress.net/SU1E/Sophie2
Skeptics and Seekers
https://skepticsandseekers.squarespace.com/blog/x-tians-part-one-what-christians-who-stay-need-to-know-about-the-christians-who-dont
Justin Brierley’s Unbelievable? podcast
https://www.premierchristianradio.com/Shows/Saturday/Unbelievable
Interact Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Send in a voice message to the podcast:
https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message
Support the podcast here.
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Sam, the blogger behind When Belief Dies. Sam is also starting an upcoming podcast of the same name. Which will include his friend Dave who remains a believer with questions. They will tackle the difficult questions about Christianity with mutual respect and curiosity.
Sam was a very dedicated to Christ and to his church. He was in the process of becoming an elder when depression and doubt led to deconversion. Sam tried to appease his doubt with apologetics to no avail.
Now Sam uses his insights post-deconversion to help others who are doubting and in the process of deconverting.
Links Blog
https://whenbeliefdies.com/
https://twitter.com/WhenBeliefDies
https://www.facebook.com/whenbeliefdiesblog/
Interact My guest appearance on the Skeptics and Seekers podcast
https://skepticsandseekers.squarespace.com/blog/x-tians-part-one-what-christians-who-stay-need-to-know-about-the-christians-who-dont
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
This week’s show is a Deconversion (not so) Anonymous episode.
My guest this week is Stephen Barry. Stephen was a Seventh Day Adventist who deconverted while attending college studying theology. When he was exposed to other ideas and other people even within his own faith tradition, this small amount of scrutiny led to deconversion.
After losing the community of the black church, Stephen has found secular community. Though he notes we have a long way to go to be more inclusive of people of color in the secular community.
Stephen is a musician and a music critic. He blogs about this love of music with great insight on Tublr. We discuss explicitly spiritual music and how we interpret it post-deconversion.
Stephen’s break down of the H.E.R. song, “Lord is Coming.”
https://barryorchestra.tumblr.com/post/190207895358/barryorchestra-presents-top-50-of-2019-26
Links Twitter
https://twitter.com/barryorchestra
https://www.facebook.com/barryorchestra
Blog
https://barryorchestra.tumblr.com/
Music
https://barryorchestra.bandcamp.com/
Interact Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Deconversion Anonymous episodes:
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/category/podcast/deconversion-anonymous/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Jessica Hagy. Jessica is the artistic and comedic genius behind the blog, Indexed. She has recently written a book titled, The Humanist Devotional. Jessica is an artist, an author, a comedian, and a marketing and social media guru.
Get as humble as you can.
Jessica grew up secular and calls herself a humanist. It is not that she rejected the bible, but rather that there was so much more for her to learn. In the episode she uses the analogy of a library card as granting access to the world’s knowledge. Access that she took advantage of.
Small talk can get big fast.
We walk through her 10 steps on how to be an interesting person and re-imagine them as how to find meaning and purpose as a humanist.
Do something!
Links Blog
https://thisisindexed.com/
https://twitter.com/jessicahagy
https://www.instagram.com/jessica_hagy/
10 Steps on how to be interesting
https://inkandescentwomen.com/the-women/author-jessica-hagy/
The Humanist Devotional
https://www.amazon.com/Humanists-Devotional-Meditations-Worlds-Greatest-ebook/dp/B07YCT8NNY/
How To Be Interesting
https://www.amazon.com/How-Be-Interesting-Simple-Steps-ebook/dp/B00ANSW8MW/
Interact Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/secular-grace/
Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Why I am a humanist
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2017/11/18/why-i-am-a-humanist/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Sasha Sagan. Sasha has written a beautiful book called For Small Creatures Such As We: Rituals For Finding Meaning In Our Unlikely World. The book title comes from a quote in the book Contact:
For small creatures such as we,
the vastness is bearable only through love.
Ann Druyan and Carl Sagan from Contact
Sasha and the book she has written embodies Secular Grace and carries on the graceful life philosophies of her parents. Sasha has a galaxy spanning perspective on life that only the child of physicist can have. Sasha has an infectious joy about life. Listening to her or reading her work it is hard not to share in this joy.
In her book, Sasha argues that we as human beings need ritual in our lives to mark the passage of time, to celebrate the momentous moments in our lives and to mourn the loss of loved ones.
We discuss secular grief in the face of the loss of her father, Carl Sagan, when she was 14 years old. Sasha shares the wise parting words he had for her and the ongoing impact he has had on her and the world.
Links Website
https://www.sashasagan.com/
https://twitter.com/SashaSagan
https://www.instagram.com/sashasagan/
For Small Creature Such As We
https://www.amazon.com/Small-Creatures-Such-We-Unlikely-ebook/dp/B07N5JQXFK/ Interact Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/secular-grace/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Joel Berry, the podcast host of the Petty Prophet Podcast. Both his blog of the same name and the podcast are from the Christian believer and politically conservative perspectives. Joel is very much a believer. He had listened to the Graceful Atheist Podcast and was curious enough to initiate a conversation.
[Due to fundamentalism] I think that I was teetering, when I was 19,
…, and I was deciding which direction to go with my life, teetering in my faith a little bit, and I joined the military, became a Marine Corps infantry man. Within a year I was in Fallujah.
[I was] a sheltered kid, [a] home schooled fundamentalist. I am taken out of the [United] States, out of my Christian bubble, and I spent a year in Iraq.
… I had a little Bible in my flak jacket that I read when I could.
Joel meets me in an honesty contest in which we both push each other but also take the time to listen to one another. I think it makes for a compelling conversation.
What compels me about Christianity? I think the first thing was that, and this is experiential … ,
I was taken out of a Christian world …
and I open my Bible and I read the words of Jesus in the Gospel and the words of Jesus really drew me in, there was something about that man that seemed other worldly and amazing to me.
Joel experienced a deconstruction from a fundamentalist form of Christianity. He left the IFB. He left a fundamentalist Calvinist theology. But he maintains in his words “a childlike faith.”
[I got into] aplogetics, the reasons to believe, the reasons for my faith, but all that stuff it’s all arguments, none of it is completely conclusive, and there is still an element of childlike faith involved.
This is a 20 Questions with a Believer episode. Joel and I take turns asking each other questions and then crucially allowing the other person to answer.
Links Joel on Twitter:
https://twitter.com/JoelWBerry
The Petty Prophet Blog:
https://thepettyprophet.com/
The Petty Prophet Podcast
https://thepettyprophet.com/homepage/petty-prophet-podcast/
Interact In the final thoughts section I make reference to this tweet:
https://twitter.com/GracefulAtheist/status/1218199410682691594 Joel brings up several episodes he has listened to. Here are links to those episodes:
Laura Anderson: Adverse Religious Experiences:
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2019/10/31/laura-anderson-religious-abuse-and-religious-trauma/
Matthew Taylor: Confessions of a Young Earth Creationist:
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2019/06/20/matthew-taylor-confessions-of-a-young-earth-creationist/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
And what else would you want from life except to connect with other people … and to talk about things that matter and ask the big questions?
My guest this week is Marie D’Elephant the host of the Everyone’s Autonomous podcast. Marie has a powerful and unique voice in the secular community. She is passionate about her own autonomy and the autonomy of others.
What is next? Since none of that is real, what is going on and how do I want to live?
Her new podcast jumps off where Everyone’s Agnostic leaves off. What to do now after a faith transition. The podcast “hosts conversations about reclaiming our autonomy and advocating for the autonomy of others through the lens of recovering from religion.”
OK, I’ve been heard, I understood what happened, how do I resolve this, how do I move forward?
We discuss existential dread, the fear of aging and facing death. Marie talks about her work on Everyone’s Agnostic and taking on managing Dave Warnock‘s Dying Out Loud tour. Mostly we talk about autonomy and how you can discover yours.
I love this autonomy and this is the life that I want to live!
Links Everyone’s Autonomous Podcast:
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/everyones-autonomous/id1485253552?mt=2&app=podcast
Twitter:
https://twitter.com/s_autonomous
Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/everyonesautonomous/
Interact Dave Warnock Episode:
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2019/08/08/dave-warnock-dying-out-loud/
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
What happens when you are married to a person based on your mutual faith and one of you deconverts?
My guest this week is Sarah who is a believer married to a former Christian and now atheist deconvert. Sarah describes herself as “born again.” She is a dedicated Christian who is very active in her church preaching and teaching. Her integrity, honesty, and heart for people come through with shining colors in this interview.
After many years of marriage that was predicated at least in part on their shared faith, her husband informed her he had deconverted and was no longer a Christian. He goes on to blogging and podcasting about his atheism while she continues to teach and preach at her church. As you might imagine, this was and is a difficult process of transition for both Sarah and her husband.
This decision that you made on your own affects us;
it affects both of us.
The core of our relationship was centered around
church and being Christians.
We talk about the complexity of being Unequally Yolked. She describes what it felt like when she learned her husband no longer believed. How do they discuss the Bible together? How do they handle their daughter and the Alpha Course? We explore ways to make a marriage work when one spouse believes and the other does not.
This has been a major theme of Secular Grace: that relationships are valuable and worth keeping even when we disagree on faith. And it is our job to love our friends and family through our deconversion process.
This is a 20 Questions with a Believer episode (formerly known as A Believer Interviews the Graceful Atheist). Sarah and I take turns asking each other questions and then crucially allowing the other person to answer.
Links Recovery From Religion has a resource page with a section entitled: Spouses/ Partners With Mixed Belief Systems (from a secular perspective)
https://www.recoveringfromreligion.org/religious-resources
Unequally Yolked (from the Christian perspective)
https://thriveglobal.com/stories/what-does-it-mean-to-be-unequally-yoked/
Interact If you are a believer and would like to have a 20 questions honesty contest with me on the podcast, get in contact: gracefulatheist@gmail.com
Secular Grace
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/secular-grace/
Steps of Deconversion: Telling your family and friends
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#in-and-out-of-the-closet
Attribution: "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest this week is Janice Selbie. Janice is a Registered Professional Counselor (RPC) in Canada helping people through religious trauma syndrome. Janice is the director of the Conference on Religious Trauma. Janice’s personal story of fundamentalism, tragedy and eventual freedom is inspiringly and honestly told on the episode.
Was it possible that everything I had believed had been wrong?
CORT2020 is sponsored by the Secular Therapy Project (a division of Recovering from Religion) and by Journey Free, which is Dr. Marlene Winell’s organization.
Use the discount code GA036 for $60 off a standard ticket.
Janice also provides a workshop called “Divorcing Religion” using the analogy of divorce to help people out of fundamentalist religion.
It might take a tragedy (or more than one) to shake you lose from your cognitive dissonance.
This episode is another in the series of mental health professionals who specialize in religious trauma, religious abuse and the emerging term Adverse Religious Experiences.
Links Conference on Religious Trauma
https://cort2020.com/
Twitter:
https://twitter.com/Wise_Counsellor
https://twitter.com/divorcereligion
Secular Therapy Project
https://www.seculartherapy.org/
Journey Free
https://journeyfree.org/
Interact Series on Adverse Religious Experiences
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/category/adverse-religious-experiences/
Attribution:
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest today is Brian Peck. He is a licensed clinical social worker (LCSW) who specializes in religious-based trauma in his private practice and who helps guide individuals through their deconversions with evidence-based practices online. His practice is called Room to thrive and Brian describes it as “secular therapy for human well being.” It is trauma-informed therapy and coaching.
Brian has had a huge impact on me and my thinking. It was a great pleasure to get to pick his brain. You can hear me learning in real-time during our discussion.
If you have survived trauma (of any sort), your nervous system did exactly what it needed to do to survive.
This episode is another in an ongoing series of mental health professionals who specialize in religious trauma, religious abuse and the emerging term Adverse Religious Experiences.
We humans need community to survive.
Links Room To Thrive
https://www.roomtothrive.com/
https://twitter.com/RoomToThrive
https://www.facebook.com/RoomToThrive/
Viral "Trauma is not your fault (period)" post
https://www.facebook.com/RoomToThrive/posts/2496151297329417
How and Why We Believe
https://lifeaftergod.org/059-how-and-why-we-believe-part-1/
Interact I quote Brian in my article on the Steps of Deconversion
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Adverse Religious Experiences series:
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/category/adverse-religious-experiences/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest is Laura Anderson. We discuss religious abuse, religious trauma and the difference between them.
Abuse is the thing that happened to you.
Trauma is the experience that your body or nervous system has as a response to the thing that happened to you.
Laura is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in the State of Tennessee, a Professor of Psychology and an Approved Supervisor through the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapy (AAMFT). She has a Master of Arts in Marriage and Family Therapy and is in the final stages of completing my completing her Ph.D. in Mind-BodyMedicine at Saybrook University. Laura specializes in complex trauma, religious trauma, religious abuse, and purity culture.
Laura has developed a manual for mental health professionals on Adverse Religious Experiences and Religious Trauma which is available on her website. This is a resource for both mental health professionals and those who have experienced adverse religious experiences themselves. Use the discount code: RELIGIOUSTRAUMA15 for $15 off the price of the manual.
Links Website:
https://www.lauraandersontherapy.com/
Twitter:
https://twitter.com/ms_elleanderson
Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/ms_elleanderson/
Interact On the show, I mention my writing on the steps of deconversion and “doubling down” that can be found here:
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Send in a voice message to the podcast:
https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message
Attribution
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest today is Captain Cassidy. Cassidy blogs at Roll To Disbelieve on patheos.com. Her focus is on deconversion, counter-apologetics and generally describing the mind-warping nature of religion. Cassidy has an array of metaphors and analogies in her writing that make a vivid picture of what it is like to believe and then not to.
Cassidy's "Extimony": She is a former Catholic, was briefly a baptist and then stayed a Pentecostal for a time. Until she realized the context of her faith mattered. While at a prayer group set in a normal university room “out of the context” of a church she realized it was all an act.
She now describes herself as “a humanist, a skeptic, a freethinker and a passionate student of science, mythology, and history.”
Join her “Commentariat,” a thriving community of commentators on her blog at https://www.patheos.com/blogs/rolltodisbelieve/.
Links Blog:
https://www.patheos.com/blogs/rolltodisbelieve/
The Handbook for the Recently Deconverted
https://www.patheos.com/blogs/rolltodisbelieve/the-handbook/
The Unequally Yoked Club
https://www.patheos.com/blogs/rolltodisbelieve/the-uyc/
Newbie Guide
https://www.patheos.com/blogs/rolltodisbelieve/series-list-and-newbie-guide/
Pool of Faith
https://www.patheos.com/blogs/rolltodisbelieve/2018/02/18/why-i-rejected-christianity-then-and-now/
Conservation of worship
https://www.patheos.com/blogs/rolltodisbelieve/2016/06/03/christians-and-the-law-of-conservation-of-worship/
Doctrinal Yardstick
https://www.patheos.com/blogs/rolltodisbelieve/2019/03/04/the-doctrinal-yardstick-illustrates-a-serious-problem-with-christianity-lsp-81/
Atrocity Apologetics
https://www.patheos.com/blogs/rolltodisbelieve/2013/12/09/the-christians-guide-to-ex-christians-atrocity-apologetics/
Twitter:
https://twitter.com/casmadeherroll
Cat Photos!
https://www.instagram.com/rolltodisbelieve/
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
My guest today is Bret Gallatin. Bret is a secular humanist activist. He is about to launch a new podcast covering secular matters and politics.
What you believe affects everybody, it doesn’t just affect you.
Bret is a pastor’s kid. More than that he is a member of a multi-generational Evangelical family. He was expected to go into the family business. He was on track to do so, going to bible college and working at the church’s radio station ministry.
The easiest place to hide being gay is in the purity culture.
Until questions about his faith and honesty about his sexuality led to his deconversion. On the path of grace, he began to question if his interpretation of the bible was correct. His coming out to his father who was also his pastor was a defining moment for Bret.
https://twitter.com/BretG/status/1158427818130366464
At the end of the day, how do you know you are right?
How do you know your brand of Christianity is right?
Links Twitter:
https://twitter.com/bretg
Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/radbret/
Recovery From Religion:
https://www.recoveringfromreligion.org/
Interact: Send in a voice message to the podcast:
https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message
Attribution: "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
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https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
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Today's show is a Deconversion Anonymous episode.
My guest today is Fred. Fred is a relatively new deconvert who is not entirely out as a non-believer. He has told his son, but no other family members including his wife. Fred grew up Catholic then his family discovered charismatic Catholicism. He has moved through various charismatic protestant churches during his adult life. He still participates in church with his family.
Fred grew up in the '80s and lived through the Satanic panic, D&D panic and the Evangelical fear of Rock and Roll.
While studying anti-cult apologetics against Mormonism and Scientology, Fred experienced the outsider test for faith. He began to question his faith which did not stand up to scrutiny.
"Anyone who wants you to think that you can stand on the strength of your faith and get what you want is placing a burden on you because so many times what you really wish for will not come true and you will blame yourself."
Interact:
Send in a voice message to the podcast:
https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message
Deconversion Anonymous episodes:
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/category/podcast/deconversion-anonymous/
Attribution:
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
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My guest today is Brady Hardin. Brady is the co-host and creator of the Life After Podcast. Brady’s story of deconstruction is a painful one. He dedicated his life to ministry at 14. He discovered he was gay, was honest about it and committed to never acting on it. He got married to a woman. He was doing everything “right” everything that was expected of him.
My biggest “sin” was to believe that the Holy Spirit actually changes people from the inside out and makes them more like God.
Then he got divorced (you have to listen to understand why), was kicked out of ministry, lost his best friend and had his son taken away. He described himself as “God’s only forgotten son.” This was where his deconstruction started.
Why am I the only one trying to do the Holy Spirit’s work for the Holy Spirit? He needs to do something. The ball is in his court.
Today Brady is an openly gay man, a humanist and a deconstruction super star. You can find him on the Life After podcast, on Twitter and Facebook helping others through the deconstruction and deconversion process. Brady is dedicated to raising awareness of Spiritual Abuse, Religious Trauma, and Indoctrination.
I can gaslight myself to be even more indoctrinated or I can take a second, get my head above water and realize: my logic has been drowning this whole time because I have been putting conclusions before evidence and trying to shove these narratives into real life instead of observing what is actually there and working off of that.
In the episode, Brady breaks down how narratives affect our lives. The Evangelical narrative is restrictive and repressive. But we can choose our narratives: a narrative of freedom, self-expression and inspiration.
[Narratives are] what we are using now, with honesty, as atheists and with responsibility to tell our own stories.
Links
Twitter:
https://twitter.com/BradyHardin
Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/thelifeafterorg/
Community group:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/thelifeafter/
The Life After Podcast
https://www.thelifeafter.org/
Interact Send in a voice message to the podcast:
https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message
Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
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My guest today is Karen, the co-host and creator of the Deconversion Therapy Podcast. Karen is a comedian, a writer, and now a podcast host. She grew up attending Evangelical schools from grade school to Bible college.
Everyone is good at something. I was good at being a Christian.
Karen was so dedicated to Christianity she became a missionary with YWAM. After attending DTS, she and her husband moved to Thailand.
With hindsight what I got called to was adventure, meaning, purpose, travel and helping people.
Honest laughter from the Thai women she was working with shook Karen up enough to recognize maybe they were fine without her Western Jesus after all. Later after reading Bart Ehrman’s Misquoting Jesus, Karen further deconstructed when she discovered the premise of her missionary work, Mark 16:15 “Go into all the world and preach the gospel to every creature,” was not in the original manuscripts.
Karen’s best advice to Christians:
Don’t research. It is bad for your faith.
Along, with her co-host Bonnie, Karen uses humor, sarcasm, self-deprecation and occasional snark to eviscerate the silliness of Evangelicalism. Their podcast is Deconversion Therapy.
We can laugh at this stuff. We are OK.
You can laugh at this. You are going to be OK.
Links Website:
https://deconversiontherapypodcast.com/
Deconversion Therapy Link Tree:
https://linktr.ee/deconversiontherapy
Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/deconversiontherapy/
Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/Deconversion-Therapy-Podcast-378017629443177/
Facebook Community Group:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/302187740481879/
Twitter:
https://twitter.com/The_DeConverted
Book Recommendation Bart Ehrman's Misquoting Jesus
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B000SEGJF8
Interact Deconversion
How To Deconvert In 10ish Easy Steps
Send in a voice message to the podcast:
https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message
Attribution
“Waves” track written and produced by Makaih Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
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My guest today is Dave Warnock. Dave was an Evangelical christian for almost 40 years. Many of those years were spent in ministry in one form or another. Dave decoverted around seven years ago. His deconstruction and deconversion cost him close family relationships. But he has found love, affection and support in the non-believing community.
In early 2019 Dave was diagnosed with ALS (Lou Gehrig’s disease), which is terminal. Rather than be overcome with grief, Dave began to talk honestly about dying as an atheist and living your best moments while you can. This became what is now known as “Dying Out Loud”. Dave is on a “world” podcast tour spreading his message of secular strength and hope even in the face of dire circumstances.
Quotes:
“Dying out loud is really living out loud.”
In regards to the fear of punishment and hell:
“It ain’t real let it go.”
“Its gonna be OK, listener, it is gonna be OK.”
“We don’t remember days we remember moments”
“Life is a collection of moments”
“Wait, goddammit, wait. This is a moment. Don’t miss it.”
“Carpe the fucking diem!”
“I am more interested in the quality of my life than the quantity of my days.”
“The human connection is beautiful to me. It never ceases to amaze me how beautiful that is”
Links: Dave on Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/DaveWarnock.DyingOutLoud/
Dave’s Patreon:
https://www.patreon.com/dyingoutloud
Dave’s Dying Out Loud at First Unitarian Society of Minneapolis
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wYLQu5A4h5Q
Clergy Project:
http://clergyproject.org/
Interact
Send in a voice message to the podcast:
https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message
Attribution:
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
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My guest today is Alice Greczyn. Alice runs the Dare to Doubt website dedicated to millennials who are detaching from harmful belief systems.
Alice tells her story growing up with purity culture, Christian Courtship and Alice's nearly arranged marriage. She describes being an atheist while surrounded by LA spirituality. She tells the story of cult-like acting classes.
As a Christian she felt she had to fake spiritual experiences because others around her seemed to be having them but she never seemed to hear from god. Her honesty stopped her from claiming spiritual experiences she knew were not real. While watching the Jesus camp documentary, she asked herself, "how many of them are faking it?"
Alice recognized that other spiritual paths still required faith. She could not accept them because she could no longer lie to herself. She had grown to recognize when she was trying to lie to herself to "make things real."
"I became not so great at lying to myself, I recognized when I was trying to make something real."
Dare to Doubt walks the tricky line to be welcoming to atheist and those just beginning to dip a toe outside of the belief waters.
"I built the site that I wanted and that I needed that I wished I could have found when I was deconverting"
Alice is interested in studying why there are not more out women atheists and what causes non-believing women to hesitate to identify as atheists.
"1% of women identify as atheist, I need to come out of the closet."
Alice recommends the Secular Therapy Project to find a therapist who will not push spirituality on you while you recover from your religious trauma.
"I feel so much more love and so much more peace as an atheist than I ever felt as a Christian."
Links:
Alice's Social Media:
https://twitter.com/alicefood
https://www.instagram.com/alicegreczyn/
Dare to Doubt:
https://www.daretodoubt.org/
https://twitter.com/daretodoubt
https://www.instagram.com/DaretoDoubt/
Recovering From Religion
https://www.recoveringfromreligion.org/
Secular Therapy Project
https://www.recoveringfromreligion.org/the-secular-therapy
Alice's Book Recommendation:
Dr. Marlene Winell
Leaving the Fold: A Guide for Former Fundamentalists and Others Leaving Their Religion
https://www.amazon.com/Leaving-Fold-Former-Fundamentalists-Religion/dp/1933993235/
Interact:
Send in a voice message to the podcast:
https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message
Attribution:
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
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My guest today is the Counter Apologist AKA John Lopilato. John is active on Twitter as @CounterApologis. He has a YouTube channel called Counter Apologist. He is also one of the new co-hosts of the RealAtheology podcast.
John has taught himself philosophy, apologetics and counter apologetics. In fact, he learned apologetics in a desperate attempt to keep his faith. Ultimately, he found the apologetics wanting. He became the Counter Apologist because he wanted there to be sophisticated answers to apologetic arguments that could not be easily dismissed. John can be found online interacting with apologists and discussing the relative merits and flaws of apologetic arguments.
I appreciate John's approach. He is often more than fair to his interlocutors. In my conversation with him, he is very kind to my naive questioning. We discuss a wide range of topics including: debate culture, the burden of proof, lacktheism, the rationality of faith, values vs facts and how difficult it is to make a compelling argument when the two sides may have differing values and presuppositions.
"I threw myself into apologetics to try and salvage my faith."
Links:
John's Blog:
http://counterapologist.blogspot.com/
John on Twitter:
https://twitter.com/CounterApologis
John on YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/user/CounterApologist
RealAtheology Podcast
https://twitter.com/RealAtheology/
https://www.facebook.com/RealAtheology/
For further study:
Kalam Cosmological Argument:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kalam_cosmological_argument
Falsifiability:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Falsifiability
A and B Theory of Time:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_series_and_B_series
Interact:
Send in a voice message to the podcast:
https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message
Attribution:
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
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My guest today is Andrew Knight. Andrew is the host of the Still Unbelievable podcast and co-host of the Ask an Atheist Anything podcast. He is a contributing author to the book Still Unbelievable. Andrew has been a Recovering From Religion peer support agent helping others through their questioning. He promotes the message: "Let's talk about human problems from a human perspective. Human problems have human solutions."
Andrew states flatly the faith tradition he was raised in, Church of Christ, is a cult. After attending bible college and working for an apologetics publishing company he began to be disillusioned with apologetics. He came to recognize the foundational claims of Christianity were not true. Andrew takes it a step further, even if the miracles of the bible were true this would not be proof of the core claims of Christianity: an infinite, all knowing, all powerful god.
My conversation with Andrew is wide ranging as we cover his deconversion story and the work he now does. He talks about his disfellowship from the Church of Christ. He describes the difficulty in telling a friend who turned out to be going through the same deconversion process. We talk about deconverts being the most dangerous counter-apologetic of all.
"Truth is a process of successive approximations"
"Changing the notion of truth to something that can be investigated and that we can get better at."
Note: Both the Still Unbelievable book and podcast are responses to Justin Brierley's Unbelievable podcast and book. Justin's podcast brings atheists and theists together for debate. Justin is considered an honest moderator. His book's subtitle is Why After Ten Years of Talking with Atheists, I'm Still a Christian. Matthew's and his colleagues' responses take aim at those reasons.
Links:
Reason Press:
https://reasonpress.net/
"Still Unbelievalbe" the book:
https://reasonpress.net/SU1E
Podcasts:
Still Unbelievable
https://anchor.fm/still-unbelievable
Ask An Atheist Anything
https://anchor.fm/reasonpress
Recovering From Religion
https://www.recoveringfromreligion.org/
Interact:
Send in a voice message to the podcast:
https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message
Attribution:
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
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My guest today is Matthew Taylor. Matthew is the host of the Ask an Atheist Anything podcast and the co-host of the Still Unbelievable podcast. He is the primary editor and contributing author of the book Still Unbelievable. His blog is entitled Confessions of a Young Earth Creationist.
Matthew's deconversion story includes growing up in the mission fields in Zambia, a young Earth creationist education, the divorce of his parents and dramatic spiritual experiences. Friends began to challenge his rejection of evolution and podcasts began to give him natural explanations for his spiritual experiences. He began to be disappointed in the apologetic arguments as compared to scientific explanations.
Deconversion was challenging and Matthew took a long time to tell his wife of his loss of faith. Matthew wants to help others through the deconversion process. He recognizes that it is a lonely process and that what we need most is another human being who has been through it too.
"Suddenly I realized I could no longer be a Christian. The suddenly doesn't describe my journey, the suddenly describes my awareness."
"If I am there when you deconvert, my response is not 'hallelujah,' my response is 'how are you? Do you need a hug? Do you need a friend?'"
Note: Both the Still Unbelievable book and podcast are responses to Justin Brierley's Unbelievable podcast and book. Justin's podcast brings atheists and theists together for debate. Justin is considered an honest moderator. His book's subtitle is Why After Ten Years of Talking with Atheists, I'm Still a Christian. Matthew's and his colleagues' responses take aim at those reasons.
Links:
Matthew on Twitter:
https://twitter.com/vteclimey
Confessions of a YEC blog:
https://confessionsofayec.wordpress.com/
"God takes the good people early" post:
https://confessionsofayec.wordpress.com/2012/03/08/god-takes-the-good-people-early/
Reason Press:
https://reasonpress.net/
"Still Unbelievable" the book:
https://reasonpress.net/SU1E
Podcasts:
Still Unbelievable
https://anchor.fm/still-unbelievable
Ask An Atheist Anything
https://anchor.fm/reasonpress
Interact:
Send in a voice message to the podcast:
https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message
Attribution:
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
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My guest today is Erik Carlson. Erik is a secular humanist and an atheist. His background in the sciences and biology led him to question his young Earth creationist and Calvinist faith tradition. Discovering his sexuality led him to question the morality of his John Piper inspired Christianity. All of which culminated in deconversion.
Erik's humanism is evident in his focus on loving people over ideology. He is hopeful for his generation's ability to make positive change in the world from the secular, scientific and political perspectives. And he has good advice for those in the process of coming out: "Protect yourself, do it in your own timing."
Erik's book recommendation:
Velvet Rage by Alan Downs
https://www.amazon.com/Velvet-Rage-Overcoming-Growing-Straight/dp/1611746450
Help for coming out:
https://www.thetrevorproject.org/get-help-now/
https://www.recoveringfromreligion.org/
Just for fun:
Erik mentions Lady Gaga's song Born This Way
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wV1FrqwZyKw
I mention Sam Smith's Lay Me Down:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HaMq2nn5ac0
Interact:
Send in a voice message to the podcast:
https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message
Deconversion Anonymous episodes:
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/category/podcast/deconversion-anonymous/
Attribution:
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/support
Lisa: Secular Sobriety
My guest today is Lisa. Lisa runs a YouTube channel where she shares from her life experience, recovery from substance abuse and humanistic values. Shortly after getting into recovery, Lisa also deconverted. We discuss what it was like to go through recovery and deconversion almost simultaneously. Lisa shares about secular alternatives to the 12 steps like SOS and SMART Recovery. We try to draw out the secular humanistic values that are embedded in the 12 steps while jettisoning the religious ones.
In the final thoughts section at the end of the podcast, I share my personal story of being a family member in a drug and alcohol addicted family and how the 12 steps influenced both my Christianity and now my Secular Humanism.
Links:
Lisa on Twitter:
https://twitter.com/HPNCAnonymous
https://twitter.com/ionamoxie
Youtube:
How not to be an a**hole
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCWEmS-qN-qkKgu3ifxzm7VA
Video on Honesty
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VXynA-IAPeI
Video on Secular perspective on 12 steps as they apply to life
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nmPdMDccMHw
Secular Alternatives to 12 Steps:
Secular Organizations for Sobriety (SOS)
http://www.sossobriety.org/
SMART Recovery
https://www.smartrecovery.org/
Interact:
Leave a voice mail
https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message
Attribution:
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
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My guest today is the producer and subject of the podcast, Hiding in Plain Sight. Tom is a non-believer living in the UK. He decided to explore the hidden things that surround him that he has so far left unexplored. He takes on the task of a search for meaning within the Christian framework.
The Hiding In Plain Sight podcast is very well produced, it has its own original music and it takes an honest and sincere look at Christianity in its first series. Ultimately, the podcast is about the search for meaning and the examination of one's life. Tom does this with humility and sincerity. It is a riveting story that you must hear.
Tom's reason for doing the podcast:
"For most of my adult life, I have spent a few hours a day on one of London's busy commuter trains. It has given me time to think. I have often stared out of the window and felt like I was missing something, some meaning. This podcast is a search for that meaning and in each series, we will explore something new, I will try on new ways of living and thinking like a new pair of shoes, and let you know how it feels, the comfortable and uncomfortable parts."
Links:
Twitter:
https://twitter.com/Tomhipspodcast
Hiding In Plain Sight
https://hipspodcast.com/
Original Music:
https://hipspodcast.com/the-soundtrack/
Recommendations:
Henri Nouwen's Return of the Prodigal Son:
https://www.amazon.com/Return-Prodigal-Son-Story-Homecoming/dp/0385473079/
Les Miserables in the US on PBS:
https://www.pbs.org/show/les-miserables/episodes/season/2019/
Attribution:
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
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Today's show is a Deconversion Anonymous episode.
Sassy Atheist is on the show. Sassy has a YouTube channel where she honestly describes her deconversion and her earnest desire to help others through the process. Hear her heart breaking story of a broken relationship with a loved one because of her deconversion.
Sassy's search for truth included Episcopalianism, Catholicism, Evangelicalism and eventually atheism. She also was on a search for community which she is now finding in the atheist community. Sassy exemplifies the themes of the podcast: deconversion, Secular Grace and self honesty.
[To god] "Just do something to tell me that you are here and that you know that I am in pain."
-- Sassy Atheist
Links:
Get in touch with Sassy Atheist:
Twitter: https://twitter.com/SassyAtheist19
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCf7XYBo2Lp54h4VU_lcfZXg
Deconversion Anonymous episodes:
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/category/podcast/deconversion-anonymous/
Send in a voice message to the podcast:
https://anchor.fm/gracefulatheist/message
Attribution:
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
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My guest today is Jennifer Michael Hecht. Jennifer is a poet, an author, an award winning academic and an intellectual historian. She has written numerous books from a secular perspective. I asked Jennifer to come on the show to discuss her book Doubt: A History and its profound effect on me post-deconversion. She is one of my intellectual heroes.
It is hard to express how much this book has influenced other secular writers and thinkers. This book has strongly influenced my other two favorite books Greg Epstein's Good Without God and Katherine Ozment's Grace Without God. Both of which quote Doubt throughout.
Jennifer proved to be as profound a thinker as her reputation makes her out to be. It was my privilege to attempt to keep up with her in this interview. I am indebted to Jennifer for coining the term "graceful life philosophy." My concept of Secular Grace is an attempt to live a graceful life philosophy.
"Great believers and great doubters seem like opposites, but they are more similar to each other than to the mass of relatively disinterested or acquiescent men and women. This is because they are both awake to the fact that we live between two divergent realities: On one side, there is a world in our heads— and in our lives, so long as we are not contradicted by death and disaster— and that is a world of reason and plans, love, and purpose. On the other side, there is the world beyond our human life—an equally real world in which there is no sign of caring or value, planning or judgment, love, or joy. We live in a meaning-rupture because we are human and the universe is not." -- Jennifer Michael Hecht
Links:
Jennifer Michael Hecht's website:
http://www.jennifermichaelhecht.com/
Books:
Doubt: A History
https://www.amazon.com/Doubt-Doubters-Innovation-Jefferson-Dickinson/dp/0060097957/
The Happiness Myth
https://www.amazon.com/Happiness-Myth-Expose-Jennifer-Hecht-ebook/dp/B000PDZFTS/
Stay: A history of suicide and the philosophies against it
https://www.amazon.com/Stay-History-Suicide-Philosophies-Against/dp/0300186088/
Review:
My review of Doubt: A History
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2017/01/16/review-doubt-a-history/
Recommendation:
My story on the Deconversion Therapy Podcast
https://deconversiontherapypodcast.com/2019/05/09/15-remembering-the-humor-of-rachel-held-evans/
Attribution:
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
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We throw around the term religious trauma but what exactly does the term actually mean?
On today's show, my guest is Kathleen B. Shannon. Kathleen is a physiotherapist. She is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor in Washington state and a Listened Professional Counselor in North Carolina. I asked Kathleen to be on the show to talk about religious trauma from an expert's perspective.
What does psychology have to say on the subject and what does she sees in her practice?
We discuss Kathleen's experience in bible college, religious trauma, outrage exhaustion and what Kathleen calls equanimity.
Kathleen's advice for those deconstructing:
"Find a space that is safe to ask the questions, preferably one where they will not give you the answers."
-- Kathleen B. Shannon
Links:
Connect with Kathleen B. Shannon:
http://kbshannon.com/
http://spiritualtraumarecovery.com/
https://www.facebook.com/spiritualtraumarecovery/
Shout outs:
I want to give Mandy Nicole (@ThatMandyNicole) credit for coining the term "Prayer Reflex." Mandy coined the term after the recording of the show but it eloquently describes a feeling I was attempting to articulate in the episode.
https://twitter.com/ThatMandyNicole/status/1123629084733349888
Ryan Bell (@ryanjbell) for pointing me to the A Great Big World's song, "Say Something," as perfectly describing the deconversion experience.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-2U0Ivkn2Ds
RHE:
The intro points out that we recorded the conversation with today's guest, Kathleen B. Shannon, before the passing of Rachel Held Evans on May 4th, 2019. The absence of mention of Rachel and her work would have felt awkward. So, I make a few statements about Rachel's impact on the world of progressive Christianity and I read a statement from Kathleen about Rachel's impact on her.
Rachel Held Evans' family's Go Fund Me page:
https://www.gofundme.com/supporting-rachel-held-evans
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On today's episode my guest is Kimberly Stover. Kimberly works in the space of losing religion recovery. She describes this process as as having three phases: Reflect, Recover then Rise.
Kimberly and I discuss religious trauma syndrome, the #EmptyThePews movement, how narcissism relates to Evangelicalism and rising up out of recovery. On Kimberly's site she has resources for those in the process of losing their religion. If you are in the process of losing your religion, you don't have to do it alone. Reach out to Kimberly and the resources she has available.
Links:
kimberlystover.com
facebook.com/realkimberlystover
twitter.com/realkimstover
instagram.com/kimberly_stover_writer
Kimberly's book recommendation:
Leaving the Fold: A Guide for Former Fundamentalists and Others Leaving Their Religion by Dr. Marlene Winell
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1933993235/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=1933993235&linkCode=as2&tag=kimberlystove-20&linkId=a6f03da1054ca490dcb844408377e3e0
Attribution:
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
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Today's show is a Deconversion (not so) Anonymous episode.
In these episodes, people like you who have gone through a faith transition can tell your story either anonymously or in all your glory. It is your choice.
If you would like to tell your faith transition story anonymously or otherwise get in touch with me at gracefulatheist@gmail.com or @GracefulAtheist on Twitter.
On today's episode, Amanda Holloway is on the show. Amanda is months into her deconversion. Things began to unravel watching the testimony of Dr. Christine Blasey Ford during the Kavanaugh hearings. This brought up her #MeToo past and she bravely reached out for help in a time of crisis. Ultimately this process led to her deconversion. She tells her story with exceptional honesty and forthrightness. She describes finally being accepted for who she is and continues to discover things about herself without the constraints of Christianity.
This episode deals with serious adult topics including sexual abuse, childhood neglect and thoughts of suicide. Please plan accordingly.
Links:
Get in touch with Amanda:
https://twitter.com/shesamandamanda
Amanda's Blog:
http://www.amandamanda.blog/
Resources:
If you need help, reach out.
1-800-273-8255
http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/
Recovering From Religion
https://www.recoveringfromreligion.org/
Deconversion: How To
https://gracefulatheist.wordpress.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/
Shout outs for those working in the Deconversion space:
Steve Hilliker and Voices of Deconversion Podcast
http://voicesofdeconversion.com/
@ExodusDoc
https://exodusdoc.com/
Attribution:
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/us/
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Have you noticed on this side of faith, you cannot escape references to meditation? I have to admit I am a bit of a skeptic when it comes to mediation. So I decided to have my friend and colleague, Andrew McLeod, on the podcast to help me understand what the practice of insight meditation is all about.
Andrew has been practicing meditation for 20 years, he has been on multiple silent retreats and he has had the unfortunate task of trying to teach me meditation.
Andrew makes compelling arguments for the usefulness of mediation. It helps one become more accepting of oneself and not mired by emotional reactions. It encourages one to live in the moment. It helps jump start loving kindness for others.
Links:
Get in touch with Andrew on Twitter:
https://twitter.com/mcleodent
Learn more about insight meditation:
Insight meditation society: https://www.dharma.org
Jack Kornfield: https://jackkornfield.com
Sharon Salzburg: https://www.sharonsalzberg.com
Attribution:
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Makaih_Beats
Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
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On today's episode I am finally getting the opportunity to discuss the topic I am most interested in: Humanism or what I call Secular Grace. It is ultimately about answering the question, "how do we live life well post deconversion?" Rather than looking backwards, it is looking forward to learning to thrive as a human being.
My guest today is Jim Palmer. Jim is an ordained minister, receiving his Master of Divinity degree from Trinity Divinity School in Chicago. After serving several years as the Senior Pastor of a non-denominational church, Jim left professional ministerial life on a quest for more authentic spirituality and has authored five books about his journey. In addition to writing, speaking and his spiritual direction practice, Jim is an adjunct professor in the areas of Ethics and Comparative Religion. He is the Co-Founder of the Nashville Humanist Association and is a certified Humanist Chaplain with the American Humanist Association.
Links:
Jim's Website http://www.jimpalmerauthor.com/
Jim's Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Jim-Palmer/e/B001JSBR04
Jim's Facebook https://www.facebook.com/jimpalmercommunity/
Jim's LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/jimpalmerauthor
Jim's Instagram https://www.instagram.com/jimpalmer_12/
Jim's Twitter https://twitter.com/jimpalmer
Jim's Goodreads https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/6862801.Jim_Palmer
Human beings having a human experience quote:
https://twitter.com/jimpalmer/status/1109421270444240897
Clergy Project
http://clergyproject.org/
The Humanist Society
https://www.thehumanistsociety.org/
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Today's show is a Deconversion (not so) Anonymous episode. In these episodes, people who have gone through deconversion or faith transitions tell their stories anonymously or otherwise.
On today's episode, my guest is Matt Cook from Toronto Canada. Matt was a former evangelical missionary to Pakistan and a preacher who lost his faith about six years ago. Matt is not your typical deconvert. He calls himself religious but not spiritual. Several years after deconversion, Matt chose to live a year "Christianly." During that year he prayed, he read the bible daily, he went to church and practiced other spiritual disciplines. Although, it did not change his mind he has found continued value in these disciplines and practices some of them to this day.
You can learn more about Matt and his year of living Christianly at his blog mwcook.com, on his YouTube channel and @matt_the_cook on Twitter.
In the show we discuss the possibility of becoming a humanist chaplain (or celebrant or officiant), if you are interested in exploring that role or if you are looking for a humanist celebrant to officiate a wedding, dedication or funeral find the humanist organization for your country. In the US, it is the American Humanist Society. In Canada, it is Humanist Canada. Wikipedia lists more organizations.
"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats
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This is the first "A Believer Interviews the Graceful Atheist" episode.
In these episodes, I will have believers on who I have grown to trust interview me. Rather than try to argue with them I’ll see if I can get them to understand why I no longer believe. The idea is to reverse the roles and have the believer in the skeptics seat asking the questions.
As deconverts, we may find ourselves in the odd position of defending our former faith when believers want to suggest that we must never have been a "True Christian" or that our faith must not have been real. This episode was prompted by a discussion on Twitter on this topic and the genuine and open response from David Hellsten.
In this episode, Reverend David Hellsten, a Baptist pastor from Milford on Sea in the UK, will be in the skeptics seat asking the questions.
The Twitter conversation that prompted the show.
In the show I mention the Clergy Project, which is a great resource for current and former religious professions who find themselves no longer believing. You can find them at: http://clergyproject.org/
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This is the first of the Deconversion Anonymous episodes. In these episodes, people who have gone through deconversion or faith transitions tell their stories.
On this episode, Susan from Scotland tells us how she grew up Presbyterian but began to ask hard questions at a very early age. She felt empathy for those who were different from herself and recognized a lack of empathy in the church leaders. Ultimately, she deconverted in her twenties and now lives with intellectual honesty, empathy and compassion on the other side of faith.
If you want to tell your story about your faith transition, get in touch with me at gracefulatheist@gmail.com or @GracefulAtheist on Twitter.
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Welcome to the Graceful Atheist Podcast My name is David and I am trying to be the Graceful Atheist. I am a humanist. And I believe that human connection is the most profound experience one can have. It is this human connection that will be the focus of the podcast.
There are three main themes that I want to explore: Faith Transitions, Secular Grace and Self Honesty.
Faith Transitions The first theme is faith transitions from doubt to deconstruction to deconversion.
If you are anything like me, the process of deconversion feels lonely and one of the first things you want to do is tell your story. But who are you going to tell? It is possible that your friends and family are still believers and they will be unlikely to appreciate your story. Even the non-believers in your life may be non-pulsed if they have never gone through a deconversion experience. Telling your story is a cathartic part of the deconversion process. If you want to tell your story for the podcast, you can remain anonymous, use a pseudonym, or if you are out as a non-believer, you can tell the world.
The message of the podcast is that if you are going through a faith transition, you are not alone.
Secular Grace The second major theme is Secular Grace.
Secular Grace is a proactive acceptance, love and caring for our fellow human beings person to person. Think of it as humanism plus. Where humanism has tended to focus on the rational for ethics and human rights, Secular Grace focuses on human connection, belonging, awe and love. Rather than be defined by what I don't believe. I want to be defined by what I do believe. I believe in people.
Self Honesty The final theme, self honesty, will be an aspirational goal and the ethos of the podcast. One of the plans I am most excited about for the podcast is a role reversal interview called “A Believer Interviews the Graceful Atheist.” In these episodes, I will have friends of mine who are believers who I trust interview me. I’ll allow them to ask the hard questions and rather than try to argue with them I’ll see if I can get them to understand why I no longer believe. If, and only if, they are interested they can come back for a second episode where I will ask them some tough questions about their faith.
Join me Please join me on this journey. If you want to tell your story about your faith transition, get in touch with me at gracefulatheist@gmail.com or @GracefulAtheist on Twitter.
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