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Shanita Liu teaches people how to activate their courage and say bye to burnout.

As an integrative healer and Chief Energy Officer at Coach Shanita, Inc., she shows people how to tune in and reconnect to their courage, power, and strength so that they can stop sacrificing themselves and start transforming what’s in their hearts into realities. Her services include 1:1 coaching sessions and group workshops and you can download her free courage activation exercise, based on her recent TEDx talk, at www.coachshanita.com/courage

1. https://www.coachshanita.com/

2. coachshanita

3. https://www.coachshanita.com/www.facebook.com/CoachShanita/
4. https://www.linkedin.com/in/shanitaliu/

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Today my guest is Neil Young. He is a peak performance coach living in Dubai, who helps entrepreneurs move past barriers and experience greater freedom in their lives.

He has created and grown his own businesses into very successful ventures. Tony Robbins is Neil’s mentor and known for having attended 22 Tony Robbins events in 22 months. He also appreciates the work of Joe Dispenza and Sadhguru. Intentions, feelings, habits and energy are what Neil believes must be mastered to live one’s dream life.

Today however he is here to share his personal experiences of anxiety.

What about your life are you proud of, Neil?

Quite a few things. I most recently had a son, a 1 year old son that I’m quite proud of and my health and three of my businesses I could go on and on. A family, health & my business is what I’m most proud of.

2.23:

Let’s get to know more about your experiences with anxiety. Give us an overview, not the nitty gritty, but your history.

Sure, my story began when I was three, living in Dubai, I had a severe infection in my ankle, a large growing lump and the doctors were concerned that it was dangerous and could travel. So I was bed ridden for 3 months. I wasn’t eating and lost a ton of weight, and this was my earliest childhood memory. I remember my parents looking down on me, and thinking poor little boy, so weak and helpless. Being weak and helpless became my identity then and also for the next twenty years of my life.

I became a big observer and copied what everyone else did. So I did what my parents said, worked hard…did what others did.

4:11

Fast forward 20 years…

I was at the university in Dubai, working for a contractor, sitting at the computer all day, and I’m a people person, and had a panic attack at work. I snuck out and jumped into my car and drove to the beach. I felt suicidal, felt terrible, sat down on the beach and realized I wasn’t coming from my heart.

My whole life I had copied others in terms of work and health, relationships and other bad routines. I wasn’t living my life.

My body was screaming at me to wake up… “All these emotions are not you. It’s not you. You have to come from your heart”. That’s when I woke up, lost my job, started drinking, put on tons of weight, cut off peer groups. I was really alone; it was a dark time. That’s when I started getting involved in personal development.

I started taking morning walks on the beach and listened to Joe Dispenza tapes and podcasts (Entreprenuer on Fire was my favorite). Getting good vibes…. from other successful entrepreneurs, and learning about their success and avoiding mistakes that they made helped me so much.

I found a class in Tennessee where there was a mastermind program, virtual, for 2 years that raised my game to a different level.

5:54:

In 2017, I did business mastery with Tony Robbins; this changed my life so much that I signed up for the platinum partnership for 85K per year program, a sponsorship.

2 things I learned: 1) Life is all about mastering your intentions, feelings, habits and internal energy, and 2) Peer group support is essential

6:20.

Panic attack and anxiety taught me that I wasn’t coming from my heart. Anxiety and stress stems from our human needs, and there are 4 of them: contribution, growth, love connection and certainty.

Contribution and growth are the top 2 needs in order to live a fulfilling life.

Love connection and certainty are important too, but shouldn’t be in the top 2.

Love life is not at the top, because if you are too dependent on a loved one, it’s all about emotions and feelings and that can lead to depression. Conversely too being too dependent on certainty, physical things, money, or don’t have a partner, how your body looks etc. can also lead to becoming anxious, having anxiety about the future.

I was too dependent on certainty and emotions and associated with others. I was so dependent and desperate for a love connection in my life.

8:00

Let’s circle back to the life threatening infection you had as a child. Your parents were extremely concerned if you were even going to live. But you were having a different internal experience of feeling weak and helpless.

How did you recognize your thoughts and know this was happening? You heard your parents say, “Oh poor Neil” and internalized it. Comment on this Neil.

Babies are born with a blank slate. As we go through life, we experience the good and the bad emotions, which shapes our character. For instance a 4-year-old child has success skiing down the hill and then goes faster, flying by as he/she hasn’t had any accidents, but the parents are saying, “slow down.” They have experienced pain. If the kid falls, he will have a negative experience about skiing.

My experience of being weak and helpless, I did a close eye process. I tried to remember my earliest childhood memory. Anyone can do this, just go home, close your eyes and breathe. The earliest memory will stand out, as it is based on very strong emotions.

10:20

For instance, Sept 11 was a pretty big moment for the world, it happens that everyone remembers where they were because of strong emotions we’re attached to that moment.

Do you remember where you were? I remember where I was.

Host says, “Yes, I was in Turkey; I was living there”.

Everyone remembers where they were and conversely, the earliest childhood memories are the ones with the most emotion, either happy or painful ones. For me it was being in bed, feeling weak and helpless with my duvet. I just wanted to stay in bed, didn’t want to go out. My parents were very worried. I was in a lot of pain and helpless. I had wooden crutches and kept falling over, I couldn’t walk in them as I was small, and that felt very painful. Even now talking about it is painful. It was painful that I couldn’t do something.

Did you parents recognize this? Or were they overwhelmed/focused with worry?

Some parents project their emotions so much the child accommodates those strong emotions.

Did they have any awareness of how helpless you felt? Or assumed that was what you were experiencing?

I’m not sure. They did the best they could. I was so little and I was so sick for 6 months, and after I recovered they sent me to the U.K. to live with my grandmother for a few months to sort some things out. It was a tough time. I’m so conscious of my kid now and how when I look at him in the eye. I’m focused on his emotions. You can be intentional about your emotions.

Anyone I’m with, I focus on their emotions. It's what I teach. Focusing on what you have and what you want to do.

13.25

When you went to the UK what did you do with that trauma? Your grandmother hadn’t been there during this very difficult period so did she notice anything different about you?

I was quite young, only 3-4 years old. It was a summer holiday. I had a 3 month break; I lived with them for 2 months, but I don’t remember too much except they looked after me and were feeding me quite a bit because I had lost a lot of weight.

When you went home, did you start playing again? You mentioned that you recognized that you became almost hyper-focused on imitating people instead of recognizing your own emotions and being able to resonate with what you wanted. When did you know that this started or did it happen over time?

It is something that I recognize now. In the 4 main human needs (contribution, growth, love connection and certainty) love connection was always one of my primary needs, but it is about the emotions.

Emotions are the identities, and you can be very addicted to emotions; they are identities. If they are not intentional, this is what I can give to you from a place of contribution. Even if their identity or they are going somewhere you do not want to go as you are so desperate for that connection, you’re happy to follow that person just to fill/satisfy that need.

For instance, I didn’t like sports and some topics, but I did it because others did. I was so desperate for that love connection. I wanted to hang out with my friends. I put my needs aside.

And you were conscious that this was happening to you.

No, no no. It’s something that I’ve realized now. At the time I just wanted to hang out with my friends. Friendship meant a great deal. I never wanted to be alone.

So a lot of my clients don’t necessarily remember or recognize that they wanted to be like others but remember this discomfort. This angst and this heavy energy all the time and that never went away because they truly weren’t free. Growing up didn’t they didn’t have the words, but a lot remember this heaviness or tension of not wanting to play sports but doing it anyway and there is just some resistance but they didn’t know what to call it or be conscious of it.

For me it comes out of human needs. If your human needs are certainty and love connection you are going to be focused on that. Emotions, are they serving you? Know this answer.

And then focus on courting the physical things around. Comfortable?… How do you feel?

It causes a lot of vulnerabilities in relationships, even when you are young because you don’t know the consequences of giving your power away. Having a sense of interests and your command of your thoughts and emotions is mostly lost just out of not knowing. And all of this is building up over the years.

So you were 25 when this incident happened. Is that right?

Yes, the contractor job, but I had quite a few jobs, this was the 10th since I was 17. I jumped from job to job. If I was going back in time I would have been more selective about the jobs. By the time I was 25 I reached enough pain in my life. Pain is a good thing. Sometimes.

Yes, absolutely.

18.48

There are two ways to change: pleasure or plain.

Pleasure is setting New Year’s resolutions, but it is not as big a motivator as pain.

Relationships hit rock bottom, have no money, gain weight, no friends, and you had to feel the pain to achieve the success.

At the time I was not grateful. Looking back now, its nature taking its course, you’ve reached this level of pain now and you need to step up and do something or people don’t and commit suicide because they are in so much pain, and they don’t have the education, knowledge or support around them.

And you contemplated suicide didn’t you?

Well, yeah, everyone has contemplated suicide at some point when in pain. In that particular moment, yeah. It was very painful.

And that was new- that hadn’t crossed your mind.

No, it hadn’t crossed my mind before.

20.49

Right. Ok that happened and you’re having the panic attack. And you didn’t have all this wisdom you have now. You said you started on your personal development journey. How, what got you there? From being at work and having a panic attack and having this very dark time in your life, your body screaming and drinking and all this pain and confusion and frustration. How in the world did you get to a path of personal development?

Through the human needs, the top two needs, love connection and certainty. I was in pain and I needed to do something different and search for answers. So I went back to contribution, where do I need to get to in my life and that comes out of human needs to makes things better and with growth taking massive action. Searching, searching.

How did you do that, through the internet?

I talked with people, searched the internet, lots of things, books, podcasts which were really helpful, like books by Steven Curby, Simon, Tally, Dumas, etc.

Every morning on my walks on the beach I listened to that podcast. “Entrepreneur on Fire” by John Dumas. It’s a free podcast.

It’s still on?

Yes

The reason I’m asking is that this is a really essential for people who have anxiety to see/understand the path of others – is really helpful to understand. Where you are now, your capacity for insight, you’re determined, its almost a natural part of you now but during this time how people get from being in the dark night of the soul to personal development is a huge challenge. Beause when you are overwhelmed with pain and panic, with negative thoughts, and even though you know to search the internet, you don’t want to do the search. That’s why I’m asking these questions. Did you have people around you?

Yes, I stopped talking to a lot to people but, my girlfriend/wife and parents knew.

When you were in this dark period how did others relate to you. Did they recognize after the panic attack that something compromising was happening to you?

I became a bit of a recluse, looking for different peer groups and answers.

Was it hard for your family and girlfriend to observe and witness this? Did they share anything about their experience?

Yes, I was very volatile. Very up and down. Very grateful to my family, especially my wife for hanging in there, and holding my hand.

Did any of them give you advice?

So that podcast my wife recommended to me and she also recommended Tony Robbins.

So that’s really important. Already, you had people around you who were engaged in growth.

Yes my wife, but my family not so much.

25.26

That’s amazing, so you found what would become your favorite podcast, what resonated with you so much for taking her advice. Cause that’s a big step from volatility to being overwhelmed to walking on the beach listening to this amazing podcast every morning.

She recommended it to me, I didn’t think this was the thing that would change my life, may have recommended 4 other things, and I listened to one episode and it resonated with me.

Someone else recommended “The 7 Habits of Highly effective People” by Stephen Covey and that resonated with me. 10-20 things were also recommended and some things stuck and I stayed with them.

27.00

Can you describe to us from the time you started listening to the podcast, what started changing- of course everything doesn’t change overnight. Can you describe what you noticed - even the first thing. You started listening to something daily that inspired you. What happened from that point forward, what little changes did you notice that cumulatively really made a big difference in your life?

So, my journey, ….there were 2 things, the first mastering internal self. At the time I didn’t know anything about that, and the second was the peer group. I didn’t know anything about mastering internal emotions/self/needs. I did know that I needed to get around other people. The people I was hanging around with were not bad people, they had just chosen a different path of life. It's like football and baseball players-hanging out, they can be friends, but have different interests and careers.

I had to get around different peers.

I recommend to people to get to know others who are helping others like, such as Tony Robbins, Les Brown, Joe Dispenza and Sadhguru all these big speakers have written books. You don’t need to pay money for them to coach you. They have all written books and the information is out there. You can get these books for free. All the information is online.

Anyone who is struggling, and thinking how do I get out of this and doesn’t have any money just pick your top role models. Go to YouTube and find someone like Tony Robbins, Jeff Cava (health) Alison Armstrong (relationships) and consume as much content as you can.

Pick 4 people, and consume the content.

I really like the podcast, “Entrepreneur on Fire” and it posts everyday. So, he’s interviewing successful entrepreneurs everyday. So I listened to over 365 interviews, he asks about their mistakes and you’re just absorbing their emotions.

So when you are talking to someone who is where you were at 25 and doesn’t have a wife who can make recommendations and really feels alone where should they start.

There are tons of groups to learn from. Peer group is key, connect through social media, meetups, and if that’s a struggle, education and there are different mediums (books, YouTube, online) so much content, free courses and some people do mentoring for free. This comes in different mediums for you to learn. If you can’t find a peer group, then learn from courses and books.

Why do you think someone who is in the throes of anxiety should believe that better is possible?

I know in the moment it might seem that you can’t see anywhere out of it. If you are thinking like that your top 2 needs, love connection and certainty can seem hopeless and there is not a way out of it, but through contribution and growth and closely linked to faith and religion, you have to believe that there is something better out there and this is coming from the heart.

The more you are in your body and focusing on bad emotions you're experiencing in your head, or focusing on how little you have, you’re really screwed.

It’s coming to your heart. Right, how do I get to my heart? How do I give one area the attention; I know now, but didn’t before and now I know the answer is out there. You have to go on a quest. It starts off hard. Any great story starts out hard and has some hardships; you’ve got to believe. You may not know how, but keep moving forward.

32:00

That is the hero’s journey starting and having some elements of faith, that you just go.

Most of us don’t know how-you have a target way out there and just start and other information and interest will start coming. No matter what simple action is taken, it is a beginning. Action is the beginning, but believing, I agree with you is a massive part of initiating the process you have to start with the belief. If you just sit there and say something is better than this it will help light the path.

The final question is: What has anxiety taught you about yourself?

That anxiety is not me. I am not my anxiety. For me, anxiety is focusing on something physical and if you don’t have it you get anxious and about it and having bad emotions/identities. I realized need for certainty which is having physical things even if don’t have them, love connection, emotions and identities. And if they are bad emotions, they make you feel bad- they are not you. Those emotions and physical things are not you.

You are not defined by being a successful business owner or athlete or a great networker in relationships. You are not defined by how much money you have, your fat content percentage or how many friends you have.

The emotions you have, identities and the physical things you have, they are tools for you to succeed. They don’t define you. If you think they define you and your bad emotions and little physical things, then you are screwed. You’re already placing limits on yourself. Just step away from thinking - I am what I have and what I feel. They are helpful like feeling and having physical things that bring pleasure, but they are tools to help you get something. For example, a health goal, you want a great body. Calories and muscles - anything physical that can help you-is a tool to get to your health goal. Emotions are tools, feeling powerful, strong, sexy, vibrant, and energetic; those are good emotions and are tools that will help you succeed. Help you be healthier. Tools help you succeed. If I don’t have those, if you think I don’t have enough muscle, eating way too many calories, I weight too much, all the wrong physical things, then you feel weak, lazy, apathetic, sluggish, your focus is too much on the negative physical things and negative emotions then you will never make any progress.

That’s why I say emotions and physical things are tools to help you.

What has anxiety taught you about yourself?

I love that I’m not my anxiety. I am not my anxiety. So often, people say, my anxiety, well my anxiety, is like an entity walking in them and it truly becomes their identity.

Thank you, Nancy, for having me on. It’s been a good conversation. You asked a lot of questions and I’ve thought about my family and how they helped me during that time and I actually learned a bit too. Thank you.

Resource Links:

Neil Young

https://neilyoungcoaching.com/

https://advancedalpha.ae/coaching/

Entreprenuers On Fire Podcast

https://www.eofire.com/

Tony Robbins

https://www.tonyrobbins.com/

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Although anxiety was terrifying, taking the ‘small steps approach’ helped Glenda overcome her fears so she could heal and thrive. ___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________   Shownotes:  

Glenda Sparrow shares her experience with anxiety and depression.

After 20 years in supply chain management, she left the corporate world to create a life she could truly be passionate about. She's a certified Primal Health Coach and a Certified Holistic Coach. Through her company, Glenda Sparrow Coaching and Consulting, she combines food choices, movement, sleep, mindset and stress management to help her clients live healthier, happier and optimized lives while never putting them on a dreadful diet.

Glenda shares how she went from zero awareness to self-awareness by making incremental lifestyle and food choices changes that improved her life. Acknowledging her depression was her first stepping stone, and while there may not be an end to it, she was able to drastically improve her life through the choices she made.

This episode begins with Glenda sharing that she’s most proud of being able to identify the issues she had with anxiety, depression, insecurities and the fear of judgment. As she thought it was normal and that everyone felt the same, it’s been quite a journey for her from what she describes as zero awareness to self-awareness. Alternate lifestyle choices have also helped her regain control of her emotions. Now, she can live a better life and help others do the same. This is why she is proud of her life today.

It wasn't until 2016 when she was in her 40s that her depression was diagnosed. Prior to this, she always had a way of normalizing it away. Dealing with the end of her marriage and loss of both her dogs in a three week period, led her to believe it was normal to feel down all the time. For five months – after her separation – she struggled with extreme depression, and nothing worked to make her condition improve. Doing routine tasks became difficult. Going to the gym was no longer satisfying. Working around people became hard. Since then, Identifying anxiety allowed her to look at her life as a whole and start to see how many times these things came up in her life before. It also allowed her to take steps to live her life differently.

Delving deep into her depression, Glenda reveals she had been insecure throughout her life. In middle and high school, she had a powerful fear of judgment. At that time, she thought it was just normal middle school & high school emotions. Now she knows better.

Her process of massive awareness and healing has allowed her to reflect back about how her anxiety and depression began. She has started writing a book about her journey.

She remembers how, once in a leadership workshop many years ago, she was asked to participate in a recorded role-play. She altogether refused to participate out of fear of judgment from others. Today she can identify when her insecurities are affecting her. And that OCD intrudes into her behavior as well. While she thought it was just a harmless desire to organize and control her life, in fact, it was her OCD making things worse for her and everyone around her. She reveals how she couldn’t even have skittles without first organizing them by color.

She also had social anxiety until last year. Today, she describes no longer being controlled by outside approval anymore and does not seek it anymore. Glenda’s ability to use self-talk has allowed her to identify the situations when anxiety can creep in, so now she can prepare in advance for many circumstances that can trigger her.

Her depression had deep roots in perfectionism. She believed the only way to be valued was to be perfect. Externally, perfectionism appeared like commitment and hard-work, so no one who knew her recognized this as compromising for her.

Looking back, she can see that most of her insecurities and defense mechanisms stemmed from the shame. This led her to build up a tough persona, not letting anyone know how she was feeling or the kind of person she actually was. When out with friends or at parties, she used to drink a lot as a defense against her social anxiety. It allowed her to become more fun around others, let her guard down and just enjoy the experience just a bit more.

She had no awareness of what other people were thinking about her or being affected by her. However, she just believed whatever she was doing wasn’t enough. She believed she was always lacking in some way. It wasn't until she started counseling that she realized a truth - that "people are rarely concerned about others. They have their own insecurities and rather focused on themselves”.

Glenda describes being from a family of four children. Her parents divorced when she was just two, and she has no memory of them being together. As a child, there was a lot of going back and forth between her parents’ homes, which were very different. Today, she feels closer to her father. Her mother has refused to acknowledge her own limitations and unhealthy behaviors, which is one reason that has led Glenda unwilling to continue a relationship with her. She continues to choose what is healthy for her.

For most people, undiagnosed depression becomes quite prominent and obvious only when a drastic event in life sends their emotions spiraling out of control. It's when most will seek help and realize that there are other ways to live and learn to live a better life without angst, fear or anxiety.

Glenda describes her revelation of having Depression as "terrifying." It was not something her therapist said to her. She saw the word on a form at her psychiatrist’s office and realized it was treated Wellbutrin, and this is what she was being prescribed. Glenda states that Wellbutrin helped to stabilize her depression, control her temper and other intense emotions. At first, even though she was taking a low dose, the impact on her life was quite profound. It was the first time she actually experienced feeling balance and ease in her mind and body. She really recognized how different it was from her norm.

Glenda had been in counseling before when she had four miscarriages and did not get pregnant via IVF treatment when she was married. Not being able to become a mother threw her for a loop because she was a perfectionist and her body was not performing perfectly. She also sought counseling when she was divorced. In 2014, a moment came when the vice president of her company knocked the foundation out from under her when he told her that who she was being at work was looked upon unfavorably by her coworkers. While she didn’t really consider it seriously, she commented to someone that she should get a noose and hang herself. Nevertheless, this experience gave her the impetus to seek therapy and discovered cognitive behavioral therapy.

However, that fateful conversation with her company’s vice president wasn’t the lowest point of her life. Glenda remembers waking up in the morning and wanting to just melt into the mattress. She felt “like a dead body underwater was grabbing her ankles, trying to drag her below with them”. The same thoughts still creep into her daily life if she's not cautious about exercising, eating healthy, and sleeping well, which are her healthy life pillars on which she relies to nurture stability in her life.

She remembers how cutting down on alcohol lessens the depression the next day, but it wasn't until she started the primal healthcare certification that she really understood why.

In 2016 when she got the appointment with her therapist, she had no idea who she would be assigned. Glenda never felt that the process or the therapists were really helping her. But her new therapist, Julie, “helped me more than I can say. She had a sense of understanding. Not just a professional, she had felt the same in her life too. She didn't tell me to just think differently.” Julie suggested a lot of books that really helped her heal on her own. Also, at this point in her life, Glenda was able to see more of her behavioral patterns, but she wasn't ready to step out of them yet.

For instance, when Julie asked Glenda about dating again, Glenda knew she'd end up with the same kind of person, and the relationship would fail. Her sessions with the therapist helped her step out of these patterns. It took a lot of work. She read several codependency books as well as books about narcissist mothers that helped her understand herself and childhood caregivers better.

However, her journey after acknowledging depression wasn't a smooth one. She remembers feeling "all of the emotions." There was certainly some excitement about the journey and learning new ways, but there was also a fear of letting go of what she had known for 40 years. Her condition can be likened to ‘imposter syndrome’ to some extent. When you become a different person, there's a fear about how society, friends, family and co-workers perceive you.

Glenda says she was afraid to engage with her family again. They had not witnessed her healing progression. So, to them, she had just become a different person. The journey made her realize, however, that she got to be more open with people in her life and acknowledge her depression. It provided her a way to separate true friends from superficial friends. And the need to be more authentic was interesting because it enabled her to know who was there to listen to and who wasn't.

Although anxiety was terrifying, taking the ‘small steps approach’ helped her overcome her fears. It did take a lot of research into the topic and deciding about the person she wanted to be afterward. The freedom she feels now, Glenda says, was absolutely worth the effort.

By knowing the kind of person she is and focusing on what works best for her, she has been able to feel more and more at ease in her life. Her journey has required a lot of preparation for the unknown, known triggers and use of self-talk. She has had to deliberately choose positive thoughts; sometimes even force a smile. Even if no one sees it, Glenda knows that smiling causes positive chemical changes in your body. Glenda has now been off the meds for over a year and also stopped going to the psychologist and counselor for therapy.

Covid-19 threw her for a loop though.

Initially, during Covid19, she didn't let the pandemic ruin her spirits. Working from home, she bought everything needed to stay happy indoors. She was sleeping well. But with gyms closed this seemed to open the door for depression, as exercising is a primary coping method. The following weeks were challenging. The uncertainty of the pandemic and fears of external circumstances drained all her strength. She considered counseling again. Fortunately, gyms reopened in Florida fairly quickly. Glenda says although going to the gym during the pandemic is worrisome for some people, it's totally opposite for her. It kept her depression at bay. The fact that her gym is not frequented by many people and followed all the known precautions helped to alleviate her concerns as well.

In the second half of the podcast, Glenda shares the effect of food on her depression and anxiety. As mentioned previously, drinking alcohol has been widely known to increase depression; it is a depressant. Even though she has known it, for a long time, she was unable to put two and two together for a while.

As she continued to study wellbeing she began to really appreciate how sugar levels in food also impact the brain. She grew up during the no-fat craze of the 90s, so reading that the brain needs healthy fat blew her away. Also, as a self-defined ‘sugar addict’ all her life, it took some effort to break down old narratives about health. Growing up, she loved chocolate, ice-cream, candy and anything gummy and consumed processed food several times a day. She learned, through her Primal Health certification to eat better, she learned that the human body needs to have good protein, healthy fats and lots of fresh vegetables & fruits. Preparation, she realized for herself, was the key. She had to choose what items to shop and keep in her fridge. She began to choose the ‘frig foods’ over ‘cabinet foods’.

The impact of food on mental health is surprising for most people. This is because the standard American diet is based high consumption of grains that the body doesn't need. Glenda stated that grains are hard to digest, and our ancestors did not have them. They ate meat, healthy fats, vegetables and fruits. Grains were “agriculturized” when settlers learned to farm. As grains could be stored for an extended duration of time, farming grains became attractive.

Glenda reveals she never tells her clients not to include grains in their diet but asks them to choose the best choices possible as often as possible. Consuming bread and pasta occasionally is acceptable, just don't have include them every night because frequent bad food choices may lead to inflammatory response, depression, diabetes, poor insulin response, premature aging and the list goes on. All of these health responses can also, and usually do, affect mental health.

Finally, Glenda shares what anxiety has taught her about herself. She described that it has taught her that she is stronger than she had ever given herself credit for. And that she absolutely has the power to choose her thoughts, pursue a healthy way to live, how to make better decisions – and not be a victim to thoughts that creep in and tell herself compromising stories. She says that each day offers new choices. Acknowledging depression and anxiety has allowed her to have better control. She now knows how to thank depression for stopping by when it appears and politely say, "Not today."

Resource Links

Glenda’s official website

https://www.glendasparrow.com/

OCD – Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Obsessive%E2%80%93compulsive_disorder

You're Not Crazy - It's Your Mother

https://www.amazon.com/Youre-Not-Crazy-Understanding-Narccissistic-ebook/dp/B00EF5L2VW

Narcissism

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissism

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Alice recounts a very traumatic experience in her life a few years ago that led to anxiety & PTSD. She shares how she lived and thrived through this challenging journey and decided it would heal and teach her.

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Shownotes:

Alice Hogan from Melbourne, Australia is the guest for episode 5.

She’s a motivation & mindset coach who helps people transform their self-limiting beliefs into self-motivating beliefs. Moreover, she's a qualified CrossFit Level 2 Trainer, Precision Nutrition Level 1 Coach and gymnastics coach. She also has a Master’s in Management. With her broad experience, Alice helps clients unlock their potential, push through heights and achieve their dreams by mastering their minds.

Alice responds to the first question by stating that she is proud of her life because she is dedicated to following through on her goals. She knows that when she sets a goal, she will do everything within her capacity to achieve it without focusing on the outcome but rather enjoying the process.

Anxiety Overview:

Alice’s anxiety stems from a fairly recent trauma.

Alice’s anxiety primarily developed from a traumatic experience a few years ago when her partner had severe medical emergency. It was a shocking experience where she had no control and could do nothing but call for help. Throughout the unfolding of the situation, the entire focus was understandably on the health and recovery of her partner; she suppressed her feelings. There was no obvious time or space for them, but they became her teachers.

It was just another normal weekend for Alice and her partner; they were enjoying the day off. All of a sudden, he started convulsing. He was having his first seizure. Alice describes how she had only seen people on TV have seizures but never in real life – let alone happening to a person she loved right next to her.

Her mind went blank. As she called for an ambulance then informed his parents, she recalls feeling numb, helpless and zoned-out with no idea of how to make any of it stop. He was a CrossFit trainer and healthy. How could this be happening?

The sense of panic and helplessness flowed on even in the ambulance as the paramedics took him to the hospital. Alice describes her feelings in these words: in-tears, shocked, confused & panicked. Her partner went on to have two consecutive seizures that day. He was put into an induced coma for a few days and ended up having brain surgery to remove the tumor that was causing his seizures.

So a normal weekend, for Alice, turned into a nightmare that involved dealing with all the questions of friends & family without any good answers and not knowing whether her partner would even live.

Alice admits feeling angry.

Before the incident, everything was going smoothly and all was in control. She felt angry for not having any control over anything about the situation. Even the relationship she once relied on was gone, as she couldn’t talk to him anymore. He was suffering too.

Everything revolved around her partner’s needs. While both of their families were very supportive, no one knew how to deal with the trauma. At times, Alice felt so muffled. No one knew how to ‘fix’ it.

A few months later, Alice and her partner separated, leaving her at a complete loss. She regrets not having any coping mechanism to deal with the trauma and rushing too soon to expect and crave normalcy after the trauma, surgery and recuperation.

PTSD from the actual incident along with the breakup itself caused her anxiety to spiral out of control. Remembering her reaction to the trauma, Alice reveals, she lost all sense of purpose. For example, an ambulance siren or even seeing a hospital turned into triggers, taking her back to that fateful day. During this time she describes not feeling anything; she just felt numb. She had no desire to do anything or work towards her goals.

Very slowly things began to shift; she allowed the trauma to teach and change her. This is why she now considers it a rebirth.

Alice recalls having met a psychologist before earlier in life but could only endure two sessions at that time. She finally realized she needed help and that's when she decided to visit a psychologist again. With this support, Alice was able to recollect all the memories of her traumatic experience and describe all the aspects the trauma many times. This process was immensely helpful in her overcoming the stress and anxiety.

The first ten therapy sessions were really quite hard. She remembers crying through every single one of them. During the first few sessions, the psychologist was trying to help Alice articulate what actually happened, but she felt so down that she couldn't even talk about it. Over time she was able to slowly talk through what happened and then relive it again and again until it had no emotional charge. The therapy sessions involved a lot of talking about the incident, recording it and then listening to it again reducing emotional intensity. This is how Alice overcame her feeling of guilt around not being able to help or emotionally connect with what her partner was going through on that day. This type of therapy was very helpful for Alice.

In one session, when her therapist asked what she wants? She recollects having no answer to the question. It caught her off guard because nobody had asked her that question in a very long time. It took a while to work through unknowing and realize that everyone is responsible for him/herself alone. Slowly answers to questions like where to live, what kind of environment she wanted to live in, did she want more open space, more plants and other things revealed themselves to her. All of these seemingly mundane questions brought her back into the present. By allowing herself to answer these questions, she found herself again and work through myriad emotions & feelings. She healed.

In times like these, most fight back. There’s guilt that we don't acknowledge or just don’t want to feel the way we actually do feel. However, allowing the experience to settle – that is, acceptance. This is the first step towards healing. While these emotions aren't very comfortable, they're happening, and they are a part of the human experience. Whatever feeling is showing up, whether sad, embarrassing or scary, accept that it is happening. Acceptance allows things to flow more easily. Alice committed to thriving through this extraordinary challenge.

This was such a tough time for Alice. Even though she and her partner separated, he was still a Crossfit Coach, which meant seeing her ex-boyfriend every single day. A CrossFit gym has several coaches. While she could have changed coaches, the thought never crossed her mind to change coaches because she wanted to accept her situation AS IS.

Alice does not believe moving to another gym would have helped. She had been training at this particular gym, and it felt like home, so leaving never crossed her mind. The relationships had developed into a kind of family. Everyone knew she was in a tough state, and each helped in their own way. One of the members helped her train, while another sent an amazing book called The Obstacle Is the Way. She didn't want to allow the incident to take away her connection to this special community.

Alice discusses how she has always had loyalty and community as two significant values but never really articulated them. It was only after reading, The Obstacle Is the Way, that she decided to be focused and push through the situation. Now she has built in the necessary drive, desire and discipline into her life to succeed as a professional CrossFit athlete, which is where she wanted to direct her energy.

This book had a profound impact on her; it made her re-evaluate her values. Who was Alice at the core, she asked? Who does she want to become? Admitting this was a big step. As a result, she created a framework of values for herself. These included honesty, hunger & drive, health & fitness, as well as family & community. Through these core values, she decided to push forward in life and achieve her goals. A lot of it was already there, she just hadn’t articulated them before. She decided that from then on, everything that she allowed in her life would fit into one or a couple of these values. For instance, having food choices that support her goals…like not having cake because it goes against her built-in identity.

How Alice implemented these core values in her life, for example, when she came face to face with her ex, however, she said, took a great deal of preparation. It took a considerable amount of time to think about what emotions could come up. What if he says hello? To prepare for what could happen emotionally and mentally, she had to decide how to get through each of these emotions in advance. She looked to numerous strategies to distract herself like clenching her teeth really tight if she started getting angry, or sometimes jut closing her eyes. These were efficient options because she knew when she was pushing herself in the gym, there is no time to process her emotions. She describes how important it is to really focus on what you are doing in a moment. She would unpack her feelings between 2:00 and 2:30 pm during her breaks and after her day ended. She really allowed herself to feel her emotions, whether it was anxiety, anger, sadness or disappointment during her 'off time'. She developed a boundary for her emotions so she could still live her life.

Alice believes decisions are critical in cutting away distractions. And that’s exactly what she was doing, aligning herself with the objectives and cutting all the extra stuff minute by minute. Alice believes that once you have decided and aligned your actions with your decisions, it is easier to confront challenging circumstances because the decision about how you will react to them has already been made.

Alice states that this why it is key to know who you want to be, because when you know it, you can cut away all distractions. This was indeed a harrowing process, she admits, but it made her a much stronger person. It also allowed her to be open to learning. She believes such awareness and skills are essential for everyone because your life is in your hands, and no one else will push you forward if you don't put work into it. No one will come and save you.

Alice confidently asserts, "I'm the hero of my own life."

She reveals that during this period, she used to listen to Impact Theory with Tom Bileu, did a lot of research, read books and wrote down key things that resonated with her. She wanted to bring Knowledge into her life.

To be clear, Alice admits, it wasn’t like she never questioned whether she was doing the right thing or not. According to her, although she sometimes questioned the process, she knew it was what she needed to be in control of the situation. She built this belief in her system that no matter the circumstances, things will get better. Therefore, she decided to look fully into the eyes of positivity and optimism.

This illuminates one of Alice's remarkable character traits, that of alignment. She has successfully aligned her internal and external selves through the power of decision-making. As she continued to build on her inner strength, it fueled her passion for what she loves most (CrossFit) and it continues to improve her outer strength as an athlete. Her inner and outer alignment is quite evident.

The discussion then briefly touches on the situation in Melbourne during the Covid19 lockdown period. Alice talks about how her core values are again helping her get through this turbulent time. Her determination and commitment to a goal has really helped her. She knows here is always a positive side and looks for it. She knows that bad days are part of life, as it is the human experience. However, it shouldn’t mean you cannot enjoy living life. She is very clear about approaching the troubles with a glass half-full attitude.

Hardships, anxiety and troubles are human. They’re normal. It is what you do with these emotions and situations that matters. Being strong doesn’t mean you don’t experience emotions. Conversely, it is about acknowledging these emotions. Once you acknowledge, you can then engage with them to evolve into a better version of yourself.

In the last part of the podcast, Alice discloses how anxiety has taught her that she is brave and strong. It has taught her that she can get through life. Acceptance has helped her experience all these emotions knowing that challenges are a part of life. She says, she knows that she can choose to get stuck and trapped in anxiety or use it to become a stronger individual.

Moreover, while a current situation may hurt, a time will come (whether a day, a week, a month or a year), she will be glad she went through it. Therefore, knowing in her core that she will be stronger no matter what, she pushes through tough situations and uses them for fuel in the future.

Timestamps

· [02:03] What about her life Alice is most proud of today

· [02:55] A general overview of Alice’s anxiety

· [05:20] Alice shares prior experience with anxiety before her trauma

· [08:28] Alice paints the picture of her traumatic experience

· [11:50] Alice describes her emotions at the time of her traumatic experience

· [16:05] How did Alice manage to live minute-by-minute during this period

· [19:10] After initial failure, what prompted Alice to go back to her psychologist

· [28:14] Alice talks about seeing the psychologist

· [32:50] How Alice developed her moral guide

· [35:17] How Alice implemented it at the gym

· [39:59] How the process felt for Alice

· [42:00] How did Alice know that this was exactly what she needed to do to get through this

· [44:25] Covid19

· [48:20] What has anxiety taught Alice about herself?

Resource links

Alice Hogan's Professional Profile

https://www.linkedin.com/in/alice-Alice-4ab21ab7/?originalSubdomain=au

The Obstacle Is the Way: The Timeless Art of Turning Trials into Triumph by Ryan Holiday

https://www.amazon.com/Obstacle-Way-Timeless-Turning-Triumph/dp/1591846358

Tom Bilyeu’s Official Youtube Channel

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCnYMOamNKLGVlJgRUbamveA

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Kylie unveils her experience of growing up with anxiety, how it held her back and how she learned to overcome it through mindset, strict food discipline and spirituality. It’s an informative hour about living a life with high-functioning & food anxiety.

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Shownotes:

In this fourth episode, our guest is Kylie Hines from Omaha, Nebraska. She is currently a Math teacher, Volleyball Coach and mentor. She has 10+ years of experience in coaching, teaching and holds a Master’s Degree in Ministry. Taking advantage of their quarantine date nights, she recently started a coaching business with her husband called, "We Well Walk." It is about helping others stop missing out on moments in life that matter the most due to lack of presence, openness and appreciation.

In response to the first question about why she is proud of her life today, Kylie explains that despite her busy schedule as a teacher, coach and mother, she has taken the day for herself! This is a highly unusual decision, as she is just learning that it is okay to experience self-care. Already today, she has taken her kids to the sitter, taken a nap and will spend the rest of day resting however she likes. Kylie further explains how Covid-19 has disrupted every aspect of normal life. As a mother of two very young children, as well as being a wife, coach & teacher who is working from home during the pandemic, she has been quite challenged in balancing these demanding aspects of her life.

Anxiety Overview:

Kylie’s anxiety stems from two things:

1. fear of not being perfect, and

2. effect of certain foods on her health.

The podcast starts with Kylie tracing her anxiety back to childhood. As a kid, she loved school. The symptoms of anxiety started when she was in elementary school. She recounts the last day before summer vacation in elementary school when she started having stomach aches. As they worsened, her parents took her to several doctors with no clear diagnosis and presumed it was due to psychological reasons. Eventually, the doctors suggested to her mother that Kylie be evaluated by a psychologist.

Kylie remembers being asked one question by the psychologist that is often considered a way to define an individual’s life perspective: Is the glass half full or empty. Because Kylie had an overall positive outlook on life, her answer was "half full." Unfortunately, the psychologist failed to diagnose her high level of stress & anxiety in the context of her response. As a result, Kylie’s stomach aches persisted; she internalized and adjusted to them being a normal part of her life.

Fast forward twenty years, Kylie’s pain and anxiety worsened after having her second child. On the insistence of her husband, Kylie met with a therapist and finally learned that both food and anxiety were causing her stomach aches.

As Kylie reflects on those twenty years, she can clearly see how anxiety affected her life. As a very high functioning individual, she performed well in school and sports: she was a perfectionist. What she would learn is that perfectionism comes with its own disadvantages; for instance, becoming a procrastinator and a risk avoider.

Kylie was committed to not failing. She didn't want to put herself in situations where she thought she could not or would not perform well. This required a lot of energy, and it was exhausting. For example, even though she was a very athletic individual, and she didn't compete in certain events so that she would avoid potential embarrassment. If Kylie thought she would be socially compromised in some way at an event, she would pre-plan on how to handle it, particularly in larger groups. Stuck up and selfish are ways that Kylie presumes she was perceived because she was so conscientious. These labels exacerbate anxiety.

Kylie shares Stanford Research that shows that children given titles like ‘talented’ or ‘smart’ during their early years can be harmful to them later in life. It posits that such titles make them feel they must perform exceptionally all the time. Kylie felt that such expectations did not allow her creative space and hindered her potential. The dissonance, however, is always remarkable. While some may be proud of their perfect grades, people suffering from anxiety can experience the same experience differently. Nothing ever seems quite good enough and fear of losing status.

Kylie’s mother died at age 48 from a cardiac event, and this was a turning point in her life. It changed her perspective on life and really showed her that life is very short and that many things are taken for granted. Consequently, she realized that she needed to be more appreciative and be more present in life.

Another significant moment for Kylie was one day while helping lead retreats for private school students; she experienced how open and vulnerable the kids were. It made her realize that she too needed to be more open and in-tune with life. Then a friend recommend that she sign up for a master’s in ministry program. Without any prior background, she signed up, and it led her on an amazing journey of self-reflection.

Kylie’s self-reflection process – aided by her spiritual director – helped her work through the inner causes of anxiety so that she could live a more peaceful life. Kylie still remembers the very first question her spiritual director asked her, “Who are you”? This question allowed her to begin seeing herself from a different perspective (the way she is), rather than what others thought of her. This inner journey affected every aspect of her life.

One requirement of Kylie’s master’s program was completing an 8-day silent retreat. She’d never done anything like this and felt immense discomfort. On the way there, she was sick to her stomach, was sweating profusely and felt like throwing up. She had a six-month-old daughter, and the thought of leaving her for almost ten days was outright terrifying.

It was very challenging initially as Kylie had to adjust to being in conversation with only one person, her spiritual director, for one hour each day. This experience allowed her to deeply reflect on herself and her life. For example, she remembered her love for writing in cursive when young and shares that she stopped because everyone else was writing in print and did not want to be different. After the retreat, Kylie continued writing in cursive and started slowing her life down.

The discussion then moves on to how knowing yourself can be quite scary because you don't know what you will find as you confront yourself. Despite its challenges, however, the benefit is that once you start accepting your past, you can stop it from affecting your future so much. You can start by making little changes in your life, like letting go of things holding you back or letting go of things that aren’t really serving a purpose in your life.

Kylie suggests prioritizing what you need to do and says that, “If you are trying to do everything all of the time, you aren't doing any of it well”. She recommends slowly adopting new changes – then the fulfillment will come. She believes you will be far more present for the people in your life who need you to be present the most.

Working through her anxiety has helped Kylie understand her math students much better as well. She can spot anxiety when one of her students feels overwhelmed or is afraid of failing. She describes one of her math students, who struggled with an eating disorder and would go to her classroom every day to vigorously work on homework & assignments because she probably felt at ease there. She could not tolerate anything less than a perfect score. Kylie says that there is always one such student in her class. Because of her experience with anxiety, she is able to help her students understand that discomfort & failure isn't all bad. It's a part of the rollercoaster of life. All you have to do is just let it be.

Nancy (the host) suggests that it is so important to acknowledge & accept what is happening at any given time and resting in that space is a first step towards balancing oneself. Personifying things (like emotions) also helps people recognize the problem. For example, what if your anxiety was a child? Would you say I don't care about you, or I don't care that someone just hit you. It is highly unlikely. Nancy questions, “Why then, do we it to ourselves?”

Kylie then talks a bit about her food anxiety. She believes that focusing on what you can have and knowing what agrees & supports your body/health is key. She also suggests to always look ahead and prepare for possible triggers can help people overcome food anxiety. When you say, "I can't," you are just setting yourself up for failure. Secondly, plan ahead. Sometimes Kylie plans her food intake/meals a week ahead. She also makes sure that she packs food for snacks and sometimes even when going out to ensure she takes care of herself. Living with food anxiety means that Kylie has to be more proactive in life, particularly on long days away from home or when eating out.

In the final minutes of the podcast, Kylie shares what anxiety has taught her about life. She says that it has taught her that it is okay to not be perfect and that discomfort is natural. She says that anxiety may not be pretty all the time, but accepting it allows you see what it has to offer – a perspective rich with human emotions.

Kylie comments that as the pandemic rages on, the world needs people who have learned to cope with their anxiety so they can share with others that it's fine not to know what to do and that it is okay to feel uncertain/anxious because everything will work out for everyone.

We may not know when that will happen, but it will happen. Acknowledging anxiety is the first step to overcoming it.

Timestamps

· [01:28] What about herself Kylie is most proud of today

· [03:30] A brief overview of Kylie’s anxiety in her own words

· [04:51] When did Kylie first recognize the symptoms of anxiety

· [08:33] Kylie talks about the events leading up to the diagnosis

· [11:30] The low-FODMAP diet and how it helped Kylie overcome stomach aches

· [12:26] anxiety because of food: Kylie talks about

· [13:26] How anxiety looked for Kylie

· [16:30] anxiety is everywhere

· [19:25] The value of failure and why it is important

· [22:40] Kylie shares her experience of the Ministry program

· [23:27] what is a spiritual director and how they can help you

· [25:55] How did the point of acceptance lead Kylie to engage with her inner self

· [27:00] Eight days silent retreat explained by Kylie

· [30:30] Kylie talks about the changes her mother’s death brought in her life

· [32:15] Knowing yourself can be terrifying

· [34:00] How Kylie takes the knowledge of self-realization and anxiety to her Maths classroom

· [35:50] Kylie discusses Chop Wood Carry Water Book

· [41:10] How Kylie prepares for life with food anxiety

· [45:54] What has anxiety taught Kylie about herself

Resource links

Chop Wood Carry Water: How to Fall in Love with the Process of Becoming Great by Joshua Medcalf

https://www.amazon.com/Chop-Wood-Carry-Water-Becoming/dp/1483441784

We Well Walk Wellness Wheel Assessment: helps identify which dimension of wellness may be adding unidentified stress to their lives.

https://view.flodesk.com/emails/5ef55c3aec55da0026875c84

IG: https://www.instagram.com/p/CBbUld0FGvY/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link

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In the third episode, our guest is Ana Cukrov from Croatia.  Ana is committed to live a free and meaningful life no matter her history and helping others to do the same.

Ana shares her personal journey of Anxiety and how it has helped her become a better version of herself. She talks about how lowering unrealistic expectations, working towards self-acceptance and having faith has allowed her to live a more full life.

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Shownotes:

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Deidre Harris is the guest for episode 2. She is a dynamic education consultant and trainer with 30 + years of experience as an educator. She is now launching a communication process she developed for workplaces called, Team Agreements.

Deidre shares her personal experience of anxiety and how it has expressed itself throughout her life and in her workplaces. She shares profound insight into anxiety, childhood abuse and thriving.

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Shownotes:

Deidre Harris is the guest for episode 2; she is from California. She is a dynamic education consultant and trainer with 30 + years of experience as an educator in many professional environments. She has worked as a teacher, instructional coach, curriculum, and program developer as well as director of training, and she is a certified life coach. She is now launching a communication process she developed for workplaces called, Team Agreements; it builds trust allowing teams to work through common disagreements in challenging conflicts.

Deidre shares her personal experience of anxiety, how it has expressed itself throughout her personal and professional life, how childhood sexual abuse fueled her experience of anxiety as well as how she practices thriving anyway!

Summary

Deidre starts off by describing that she is proud of having stepped out to follow her entrepreneurial dreams after realizing that she was not enjoying her professional trajectory, even though she enjoyed a comfortable & successful professional life. Stepping into entrepreneurship has allowed Deidre to not only to do what she loves most but also to confront her anxiety in a much more effective way. She recognizes that new is inherently uncomfortable, but the uncomfortable feeling of new waters always subsides. Deidre feels grateful to her anxiety because it made her the person she is today.

The realization of the disconnect between where she was in her life and where she wanted to be was sobering. She went through extensive coaching sessions and therapy to evolve into who she is today. Even after she realized what she really wanted to do professionally, it took over a year for her to resign. She took that time to prepare for the new phase of her professional journey; this was key to her managing her anxiety.

As an adult, she did not know she was anxious. It was only during therapy did she realize she was anxious and that a lot of her teenage behavior was linked to childhood abuse. During the interview, she goes into detail of her risky teenage behavior and why it offered her emotional validation. Nevertheless, she shares how “disassociation” was perhaps the most significant consequence from her abuse, and this symptom showed up throughout her life in different ways.

Acceptance of abuse, for her, was heart-wrenching and healing. There was a lot of grief in acceptance, but confronting it helped her move forward. The impact of her acceptance was profound not only for her but also for her family. It allowed everyone in the family to really open up and realize that the abuse that was took place was quite widespread throughout the family.

Deidre now feels grateful for her abuse because it has given her an opportunity to acquire an incredible skill set that she utilizes today to help others. She goes into detail about her abuse and shares how her discomfort of ‘being at the front of the room’, particularly as a speaker, had its origin in her past trauma.

Being coached changed her life. Through coaching, she realized that we all generally have the same experiences in life. We all feel fear, shame or guilt at some point in our life. Knowing that you are not alone helps share the load though.

Deidre talks about why reaching out is so essential even before knowing the source. She believes that with the help of others and by listening to their stories, we can often come to acknowledge and accept our own traumatic experiences. Deidre calls this the mirror effect. By reaching out to a like-minded community, we are more likely to see and hear our pain others more than in ourselves. Then through this constant feedback, we can come to terms with our anxiety. This is her primary suggestion to anyone struggling with anxiety who might be afraid to reach out for therapy.

In the final part of the podcast, Deidre reveals that anxiety has taught her that, “I am a strong, powerful woman who has a lot to offer to the world.” Her strategy to confront anxiety is to play in her mind what’s the worst that can happen. By being purposeful about it, then going back and asking is it really true, she comes to accept that “the zombie apocalypse is not happening today!” This helps her work through the situation and feel more personal control.

Finally, the current situation of Covid-19 and how it can trigger anxiety is acknowledged.

Timestamps

• [02:23] What about herself Deidre is most proud of today

• [06:44] What made Deidre make the transition from the comfortable to the uncomfortable

• [10:38] When did Deidre realize anxiety was a part of her life

• [14:44] Deidre talks about her risky behavior during the teenage

• [19:35] Who else was aware of her behavior and how was their response

• [23:10] Deidre shares how she came to accept her abuse

• [25:17] How this acceptance came to affect her world

• [29:05] How the difference in new and old Deidre manifested itsel

• [33:27] Deidre discusses how she works through it and continues to evolve

• [35:23] Deidre shares how a childhood traumatic experience manifested itself in her professional life

• [41:36] What Deidre advises people who are in the same space as she were before

• [44:07] Participants discuss the importance of reaching out

• [48:35] Deidre’s advice to people who are afraid of sharing

• [50:26] What has anxiety taught Deidre about herself

• [52:41] How Deidre utilizes her strategies in the midst of the pandemic where everyone is feeling anxiety

Resource links

Deidre’s Training Program

https://teamagreements.com/

Deidre Harris Official Website

https://www.deidreharris.work/

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In this first episode, our guest is David Gill from Oakland, California. He's a successful architect, graduate school professor, and faculty advisor at the Academy of Art University. In addition, he is principal at architect at David Gill Architect.

Today, David pulls back the curtain on growing up with Anxiety, how hard it was and is still sometimes to be himself, as well as how he has learned not only to survive but also thrive despite it.

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Shownotes: