Matters of the Heart - Relationship Classes for Singles & Married Couples: Recent Episodes
Dr. Y - A relationship enthusiast
This is a series of classes on relationships where insights are drawn from the Word of God in order to help singles and married couples understand how to run their relationships from God's perspective.
Food for thought: As a relationship or marriage partner, are you hiding information about yourself that your loved one really ought to know about, especially when that circumstance affects them?
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Food for thought: Sometimes you might a relationshipor person so badly that you are willing to do anything including hiding the truth about yourself or certain aspects of your life, just so that you can have what you desperately want.... however, is hiding the truth about yourself worthit in the end?
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Music: Bez - Zuciya Daya (Meaning: One Heart)
While it is laudable to be able to take good care of one's family as a wife and mother, part of what distinguishes you as a woman is also the ability to give balanced and wisecounsel in matters relating to your husband and children’s lives. To find out more, please visit: https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2024/06/06/wisdom-reflections-for-women-may-june-edition/
This podcast takes a look at courteous behaviours to exhibit when going on a brunch/lunch/dinner date with a love interest such as: (i) taking a small gift along (in cases where the entire meal is paid for by a love interest), and (ii) asking about the food preferences of a love interest who comes from another culture/race (for people who in inter-racial relationships) prior to the brunch/lunch/dinner date.
For further reading:
Hospitality across cultures - Hospitality across cultures - We Are KeyForeign to Familiar : Understanding Hot and Cold Climate Cultures
When going on a brunch/lunch/dinner date, especially for the first time, your comportment around food says a lot about you, and gives some tell tale signs about the kind of person you might be in a relationship. Please visit: https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2024/05/20/may-reflections-dating-etiquettes/ to find out more.
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Wondering how to keep your relationship/marriage fresh and interesting? This podcast invites listeners to consider travel as a way to spice up their love lives and offers listeners a number of tips on planning for a mini-vacation for two either on the weekend or during the weekday. A useful resource for married couples and a wisdom nugget for singles.
Resources:
Global Travel Trends:
These Are the Top Summer Travel Trends for 2024 | TravelAge West12 Summer Destinations That Are Perfect for Couples (travelandleisure.com)
Getaway destinations (listed in no particular order):
Europe, USA, Africa, Asia, Middle East and Australia
Europe:
10 Best Towns in Europe to Escape the Crowds This Summer - Men's Journal (mensjournal.com)
USA: 50 Best Vacation Spots in the US To Explore in 2024 - Trip Canvas (aaa.com) (Note: 21 - 40 for couples)
Africa: 5 Budget-Friendly Destinations in Africa - LagosMumsWest Africa Unbound: The Top Travel Destinations Across The Region - CNBC Africa
Asia:
The Best Places to Go in Asia in 2024 | Condé Nast Traveler (cntraveler.com)
Middle East:
Dubai Travel Guide & Tips | Condé Nast Traveler (cntraveler.com)5 Middle Eastern Vacation Spots To Hit This Summer | About Her
Australia:
Ultimate Australia travel guide (2024) – Finding Alexx travel blog
Sometimes relationship partners enter into a relationship with either no ideas or misguided ideas about how to relate with their loved one. Drawing upon insights from Scripture, this podcast explores fundamental traits relationships need to be premised upon. These traits include honesty, genuine appreciation and kindness.
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A source of frustration in relationships is unmet expectations and this happens when partners make assumptions about their lover's knowledge of their needs and specific ways they wish to be loved. This podcast takes a look at the importance of communicating one's expectations clearly in a relationship and ways to initiate such a conversation.
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God expects that in our dealings with our loved ones, we treat them kindly and fairly, and strive not to cause them pain.
Food for thought: Showing kindness, acting justly and compassionately are not acts reserved for strangers alone, they are qualities relationship and marriage partners need as well in dealing with each other - when was the last time you treated your loved one kindly, fairly or refrained from being a source of pain to him/her?
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The journey to conception can be long and agonizing for some couples, which sometimes impacts negatively on their marriage. This podcast offers a word of encouragement to couples facing fertility struggles, and an insight on how to handle such struggles.
This podcast delves deeper into the concept of parenting in the digital age and provides insights into how parents can instill responsible online behaviours in their children, while also protecting them online.
Additional resources:Internet Safety: Christian Solutions for Christian Parents (covenanteyes.com)Get Advice Archives - Webwise.ieCredit: Image by Freepik
Food for thought: Technology and the internet are fast becoming integral parts of our lives as human beings. Given this context, what is the best way to raise a child in the digital era?
Resources for reading:
How to keep your child safe online | UNICEF Parenting
Generation Internet - Crystaline
Suspicion in a relationship is a recipe for the relationship's eventual failure as it causes mistrust and poor treatment of a relationship partner. To find out more about suspicion and its damaging effects, please visit:
https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2024/03/25/dealing-respectfully-with-your-loved-one-part-ii-relationship-killers-to-avoid-suspicion/
Relationship partners sometimes predispose their relationship to failure by entering the relationship with biases. These biases may stem from past experiences, the experiences of others or hearsay.
This podcast takes a look at the impact of biases on a relationship and offers insights into how to avoid sabotaging one's relationship on the basis of a bias.
There are times in the marriage relationship when spouses find themselves aggravated for no reason, and worse still do not seem to understand each other. On such occasions, what do marriage partners do? To find out more, please visit: https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2024/03/11/march-reflections-when-your-relationship-goes-through-a-rough-patch-a-spiritual-perspective-for-married-couples/
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This podcast provides further insights into ways to break negative relationship patterns in families and establish new ones.
Further reading resources (for singles and married couples):
https://www.eaglefamily.org/marriage-roles-complement-each-other/
https://joyfullifemagazine.com/ezer-kenegdo-created-to-be-his-helpmeet/
At the heart of several relationship troubles sometimes are negative behaviours or behavioural patterns which are inherited. This podcast takes an in-depth look into how negative behaviours are passed down as relationship legacies and offers insights into how such behavioural patterns can be dismantled.
This podcast invites listeners to take the time to reflect on the relationship legacy handed to them by their families and to pay attention to the relationship legacy they are passing on to their own children and wards.Credit: Image by Freepik
Sometimes the Valentine Season can be hard to celebrate for anyone not in a relationship. This podcast provides insights into the universal nature of love and how it can be celebrated, regardless of one's relationship status. Useful for both singles and married couples.
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This podcast offers practical tips and ideas on how to create a 'love basket' for a loved one. The items in the love basket could include gift cards for spa treatment or gym workout sessions, high quality chocolates, or ethnic clothing (e.g African print clothing, kaftans, kimonos, etc)
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Food for thought: When you and your loved one enter into a spat or disagreement, how do you handle the situation?
Sometimes in the heat of emotions in a relationship, there is the tendency for relationship partners to engage in certain behaviours to either prove their love for each other or assure themselves of the permanence of their relationship (e.g. make promises, enter into pacts or place a lover's name or initials as a tattoo on one's body).
However not all relationships work out and sometimes lovers have to part ways. The words spoken or the pacts made however remain in force and sometimes haunt partners in their new relationships or marriage.
This podcast provides insights into the nature of spoken words and the need to guard against making rash promises in relationships.
A relationship or marriage runs the risk of becoming dull and uninteresting when the partners in the relationship/marriage become complacent. This podcast takes a look at a possible way to avert this problem, which is by being intentional. Slightly mature contentImage Credit: Image by jcomp on Freepik
Words have the potential to build or destroy a relationship or marriage depending on the way they are used. This podcast takes a look at the need for the prudent and wise use of words during crisis situations in a relationship or marriage.
As 2023 comes to a close, this podcast provides insights into how to assess your love relationship along spiritual, emotional, social and educational dimensions.
Matters of the Heart Relationship Classes for Singles and Married Couples wishes everyone a Happy New Year and a love -filled 2024
This podcast explores ways to establish one's credibility as a trustworthy relationship /marriage partner. This includes keeping your word, practising accountability and avoiding deception.
It is one thing to build trust in a relationship /marriage , it is another to ensure that the partner who is being entrusted with one's heart has the capacity for such a responsibility. To find out more, please visit: https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2023/12/13/december-reflections-2-building-trust-in-your-relationship-and-marriage/
Trust is an essential but increasingly scarce ingredient in today's relationships and marriage. If you're wondering how to build trust in your relationship/marriage, please visit:
https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2023/12/04/building-trust-in-your-relationship-marriage-december-reflections/
One of the hardest things a person can go through is a divorce. It takes its toll on the emotional, mental and physical wellbeing of individuals as hearts and lives are torn apart. This podcast offers a word of comfort to the one undergoing a divorce, has been recently divorced or has been divorced for a long time.
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A common question that rings in the minds of singles is ' When is the right time to be in a relationship?' This podcast explores a number of pointers singles need to consider when attempting to discern the right time to be in a relationship.
When it comes to falling in love, the heart makes no distinctions. What do you do when you find yourself falling in love with someone you know very well, say a close friend - how do you broach the subject with such a person and what do you do if he/she does not share the same feelings with you? This podcast addresses some of these issues.
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What do you do when you develop strong feelings for a person but he or she does not share the same feelings with you? This podcast provides some food for thought on why love sometimes goes unreciprocated.
This podcast takes a look at steps single ladies can take to prepare for their future as parents. These include seeking God's plans concerning their unborn children, reading books on parenting, and praying for wisdom for themselves and their future spouses to raise their children in future.
This podcast concludes the series on 'Wisdom nuggets for single ladies: Preparing for relationships, marriage and parenting'
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This podcast offers singles (especially females) insights into necessary steps to take ahead of proceeding into a relationship or marriage.
(This podcast is a continuation of the topic on https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2023/10/16/wisdom-nuggets-for-single-ladies-preparing-for-relationships-marriage-and-parenting/)
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Being a relationship partner, a spouse or a parent comes with its own requirements and responsibilities. None of these areas should be taken lightly or handled irresponsibly because it involves the entrusting of lives and hearts into one's care. The first step towards becoming a lover, a spouse or parent is preparation, and preparation starts with adopting the mindset of a builder. Please visit: https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2023/10/16/wisdom-nuggets-for-single-ladies-preparing-for-relationships-marriage-and-parenting/ to find out more.
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This podcast explores certain dynamics in marriage such as its threesome nature and the uniqueness of every marital journey.
Note: This podcast is a sequel to the topic ' Enjoying your loved one and your love triangle with God' on wordpress.com:https://wordpress.com/post/mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/463)
Ever wondered the primary reason for having a spouse? Have you also considered that marriage really is a threesome? For answers to these questions, please visit:
https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2023/10/02/october-reflections-enjoying-your-loved-one-and-your-love-triangle-with-god/
When there is a disagreement in marriage, some spouses find it difficult to manage their emotions. In the heat of emotions, some resort to physical violence, become verbally abusive and/or damage property, which could include property belonging to their loved ones. This podcast challenges spouses who have trouble managing their tempers to reflect on their actions, while providing insights into better ways of managing their emotions. This podcast is designed to make listeners think and is not for the faint-hearted.
Recommended reading:
https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2023/09/16/anger-management-and-conflict-resolution-in-marriage/
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Misunderstandings are bound to occur in marriage, and when they occur, they need not be viewed as deal breakers. Depending on how misunderstandings are handled, they can lead to either a strengthening or disintegration of the marriage relationship. Please visit
https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2023/09/16/anger-management-and-conflict-resolution-in-marriage/ to find out more.
What do you do when you find yourself surrounded by many love interests at the same time, and all of them want to have a relationship with you? Do you play 'eenie -meenie-mini-moo' to determine who to go with or cast lots to decide? Please visit https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2023/09/11/dating-wisely-for-singles/ to glean some tips from Israel's wisest king, Solomon on how to deal with such baffling scenarios as a single.
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The best gift parents can give their children is emotional stability. When a marriage is unstable and fraught with friction and conflict, it rubs off on the children and causes them to become emotionally insecure or unstable adults who exhibit dysfunctional behaviours in their own relationships later in life. Please visit https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2023/09/04/emotional-stability-a-childs-best-gift/ to find out more.
Marriage is a lifelong journey and this podcast revisits the basics of marriage and what it entails. It also addresses certain realities intending couples need to consider and prepare for which include: a single-minded devotion to one's spouse, a willingness to provide lifelong companionship and a readiness to be flexible which includes learning and unlearning things.
Reading resource on how to be a lifelong companion: https://www.biblestudytools.com/bible-study/topical-studies/beautiful-lessons-in-biblical-friendship-from-david-and-jonathan.html#google_vignette
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Beyond love, there are other qualities that make a relationship or marriage interesting. One of such qualities is selflessness. Please visit https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2023/08/19/selflessness-an-overlooked-trait-in-marriage/ to find out more about this overlooked relationship/marriage enhancer.
Moving on after a relationship has ended can be very hard as the heart which has been used to the feeling of love, struggles to adjust to a new reality. The heart's first reaction to a breakup is pain and some individuals in a bid to avoid pain run into new relationships without properly healing from their past. This strategy is similar to breaking one's ankle and expecting to start walking immediately with an injured ankle. Please visit https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2023/08/15/moving-on-with-life-after-a-breakup-for-singles-part-2/ to find out more about moving on after a relationship breakup.
What do you do after a promising relationship breaks down and everyone finds themselves going their separate ways? Do you hold on and pine for the past or hold on and refuse to let go even when the other party demonstrates a disinterest in continuing the relationship - what do you do? Please visit: https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2023/08/06/moving-on-with-life-after-a-breakup-for-singles/ to find out how to move on with life after a breakup. Wisdom nuggets for singles.
Every marriage is unique and the journey to attaining oneness differs for each couple. Problems arise when parents or extended family members of one or both marriage partners try to meddle and shape the marital journey of a couple to suit their ideologies or personal preferences. Visit https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2023/07/29/reflections-on-marriage-2/ to find out more about God's vision for marriage in Genesis 2: 24 and its practical implications for married couples and their families of origin.
Sometimes friction occurs in relationships and marriage because there is a poor understanding of what marriage really is. Some mistakenly assume marriage is a continuation of the status quo in their families of origin, however Genesis 2: 24 reveals that marriage is a journey into oneness. Head on to https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2023/07/22/reflections-on-marriage/ to find out more about the true meaning of this verse and its implications for singles, married couples and in-laws.
Genesis2: 24: This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.
Honesty is a badly needed virtue in today's world and this podcast takes a look at the importance of this vital trait in relationships and marriage.
Discernment is necessary when choosing a life partner because the answer is not always so obvious. Eliezer, the servant of Abraham faced the daunting task of choosing a wife for his master's son, Isaac but invariably succeeded in his mission with God's help. Head on to https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2023/07/11/choosing-a-life-partner-lessons-from-eliezer-the-servant-of-abraham/ to find out valuable relationship lessons and insights from Eliezer's example that can be applied in today's dating context. Wisdom nuggets for singles.
It is not in all instances that the breakdown of a relationship/marriage is due to vice. Sometimes just inflexible or complacent in a relationship/marriage is enough to cause the association to breakdown. Please visit: https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2023/07/03/cultivating-healthy-attitudes-towards-relationships-and-marriage-part-2/ to find out more.
This podcast offers insights based on God's Word into why several sexual orientations exist and also takes a look at a sometimes overlooked cause of some alternative sexual lifestyles: sexual abuse.
*For anyone struggling with issues relating to sex and sexuality and needing help, please reach out on matters.fm@gmail.com (your confidentiality is assured).
Photo credit: Shutterstock
The subject of sex is one that has always captured the fascination of many civilizations over the ages. Various ideas about sex and sexuality have been developed over time and in an age where raging debates and conversations on multiple sexual orientations are rife, this podcast delves into the Scriptures to explore the concept of sex and sexuality from the lens of its original author and designer - God. (Very mature content)
Just as there are various types of individuals, there are different types of lovers. There are those who are willing to give their very best to make a relationship work, while there are others who somehow believe that all the benefits of being in a relationship or marriage will come rolling in automatically with no effort on their part. However this expectation is similar to expecting a garden to be beautiful on its own, which is unrealistic. Please visit: https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2023/06/11/cultivating-healthy-attitudes-towards-relationships-and-marriage/ to find out more about cultivating a healthy attitude towards relationships and marriage.
There is a tendency sometimes for the labour and efforts of hardworking men to go unrecognised, with their efforts simply termed as 'discharging their responsibilities'. However responsibility is a choice and as Father's Day approaches, this podcast turns the spotlight on this special group of men and shares insights on how to refresh their hearts.
A key trait to look out for when trying to find a partner who is just right for you is their willingness to support your dreams and ambitions. However there are times that life does not go as expected and sometimes both you and your loved one might find yourselves caught up in plans that are much bigger than yourselves and way out of your control. This is where yet another key character trait is needed. Head on to: https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2023/05/29/spotting-your-partner-who-is-just-right-for-you-from-the-crowd-2/ to find out more.
‘How do I know he/she is the one?’ is a common question singles ask when trying to find a partner to settle with. This question is definitely not an easy one to answer as it requires discernment (the ability to distinguish one thing from another such as truth from falsehood, virtue from vice, etc.) or sound judgement. Please visit: https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2023/05/20/spotting-your-partner-who-is-just-right-for-you-from-the-crowd/ to see some pointers that be can be considered when trying to spot a suitable partner from the crowd.
Case study: Anne and Frank are engaged to be married in a fortnight. Anne is five weeks pregnant and as the countdown to their wedding begins, Frank suddenly calls Anne in the middle of the night to call off their engagement. It turns out that he’s been seeing another lady while they were together, and she is two months pregnant. The other lady comes from a very wealthy family and her family has promised to make life difficult for him if he doesn’t marry their daughter.
Please visit: https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2023/05/15/when-trust-is-betrayed-in-marriage-and-relationships-2/ to explore possible ways to resolve Frank and Anne's relationship crisis.
As humans we are prone to error and while some offences can be overlooked such as a loved one who regularly throws clothes all over a neatly cleaned floor, what happens when the offence directly attacks the foundation of the relationship and trust is broken? Visit https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2023/05/07/when-trust-is-betrayed-in-marriage-and-relationships/ on wordpress.com to find out more.
In a time where casual sex is considered a norm among singles and expected in relationships, sometimes people are shamed for deciding to refrain from sex until they are married. This podcast offers a word of encouragement to young and mature singles who desire to keep sex out of their relationships until marriage. Frank, hard talk about sex before marriage and not for the faint-hearted.
Movie title: The 40 year old virgin starring Steve Carell
Ever wondered why two people who are genuinely in love drift apart and their relationship or marriage crashes? This podcast takes a look at two root causes and offers insights on developing healthy and realistic expectations about love in a relationship or marriage.
As a marriage partner, part of the husband’s role requires him to treat his spouse well. However some husbands are guilty of mistreating their wives in marriage. This article takes a look at a possible cause of such behaviours and offers husbands tips on treating their spouses right in marriage. Visit reflections-for-husbands-treating-your-spouse-right-in-marriage on wordpress.com
This podcast is a continuation of an earlier podcast specially prepared for once married individuals who lost their spouses very early in the life of the marriage or lost their spouses at a very young age. This podcast offers both comfort and new considerations to all such persons this Easter season. May your heart be consoled.
Bereavement is never easy and losing a loved one, particularly a spouse can really sting. This podcast is specially prepared for marriage partners who lost their spouses at a very young age or while the marriage was still in its infancy and are still grieving many years later. The podcast offers hope, encouragement and a call to a new beginning. May God's healing balm soothe your aching heart.
Suggested resources for young widows and widowers:
TV Series: When Calls The Heart (adapted from Janette Oke's book with a similar title: When Calls The Heart) starring Erin Krakow, Pascale Hutton, Jack Wagner.
Movie: Love Comes Softly (Duration: 89 minutes 18 secs)
The word 'leader' immediately conjures several images in the mind, the most popular one perhaps being that of a person who wields absolute power over others, with no consideration for their feelings or needs. Visit Reflections for men: The husband as leader of the home on wordpress.com to find out more about the definition of true leadership at home for husbands.
There are times you find someone similar to you to be in a relationship with, but other times, the person is the exact opposite of who you are - with tastes, viewpoints and behaviours that differ from yours. What do you do in such a situation?
Visit the following link to find out more: When two opposites are in a relationship (For singles with different personality types and those in inter-racial/inter-tribal relationships)
This podcast offers singles entering the dating scene for the first time useful mindsets to consider when starting a relationship. These include: deciding not to hurt your partner, treating your partner well and being a giver. This podcast also offers singles re-entering the dating scene practical tips to consider when re-navigating the love scene, which include avoiding a repetition of past mistakes and involving God in the relationship journey.
Today's dating scene is fiercely competitive with singles investing lots of money and time into physical looks in a bid to attract prospective dates or relationship partners. Beauty however does not only come in the form of physical looks, it can also come in other overlooked forms such as intelligence, charm, character, etc. This podcast offers singles some insights on standing out from the crowd as prospective relationship partners in today's dating scene.
There are a number of pitfalls singles need to be mindful of when in a relationship. These pitfalls include relying on 'assumed knowledge' about relationships and deception. Find out more about these pitfalls on Pitfalls to avoid in relationships - Part 2 (For singles)
This podcast takes a look at more ways to celebrate your loved one in a meaningful way this Valentine Season. Matters of the Heart wishes every lover a Happy Valentine's Day.
This is the time of the year where lovers get to celebrate each other and their love for each other. While some argue for celebrating love on a daily basis, it is also a good idea to set aside special times to celebrate your loved one. Valentine's Day is one of such special times as it presents lovers with the opportunity to express their love for each other in special ways. For ideas on Valentine gifts to consider for your loved one, please visit: Celebrating your loved one in a special way this Valentine season on wordpress.com.
Additional resource: https://www.victoriassecret.com/ie/
In the arena of love, just like any other sphere of life, sometimes things don’t go as planned or intended and disappointments occur. This podcast offers singles insights on handling disappointing relationship outcomes with dignity.
There are lots of myths that surround marriage such as:
- 'Marriage is difficult - is it worth it?'
- ' With the way marriages are just crashing all over the place, how do we know what makes marriage work?'
- 'Marriage is the final bus top. There is nothing else to do after you are married' .
This podcast takes a look at some of these myths and offers some wisdom nuggets to singles on the subject of marriage.
Regardless of a married couple's cultural or family upbringing, there should be no shame in discussing sex between the two. To find out more, please visit: https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2023/01/10/the-naked-conversations-mature-content-for-married-couples/
As the year 2022 draws to a close, it's worth taking stock of our love lives to identify areas needing improvement and new areas worth exploring. This podcast takes a look at areas singles in a relationship, singles desirous of a relationship and married couples might want to consider when appraising their love lives. Matters of the Heart wishes every lover and believer in love a fulfilling 2023.
The Yuletide season can sometimes be tough for singles, particularly who are not in a relationship and are of marriageable age. This podcast provides mature singles with some practical advice on how best to approach the subject of love and marriage. Season's greetings from Matters of the Heart.
Emotional pain can be crippling and the journey to recovery can be very slow for some because of the depth of hurt that they feel. In some cases, emotional healing can takes years for such individuals. This podcast is for the one struggling to heal, years after experiencing a heart break.
(Please reach out on matters.fm@gmail.com with the word 'heart-broken' if you're struggling to recover from a heartbreak)
For parents to successfully mentor their children in the area of relationships, timely discussions and instructions are necessary and a few things need to be taken into consideration when these discussions begin. These include the willingness to have a change in perspective and parenting style.
To find out more, please visit: https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2022/12/12/parenting-series-mentoring-your-young-adult-children-about-relationships-continued/(opens in a new tab) Wisdom nuggets for singles.
Parents have several roles to play in their children's lives which go beyond just meeting physical needs. Mentoring is also an aspect of parenting and parents have an important role to play in helping their young adult children navigate the sometimes murky waters of relationships. To find out more, visit: https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2022/12/05/parenting-series-mentoring-your-young-adult-children-about-relationships/ . Wisdom nuggets for singles
The concluding part of the discussion on how married couples can take care of each other can be found at the following link: https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2022/11/28/taking-care-of-your-loved-one-in-marriage-continued/
There is a tendency for one or both partners in a marriage to become burnt out due to the demands of raising a family or the pressure of living up the expectations of others (e.g extended families, friends and/or society). This podcast takes a look at the purpose of marriage and the primary need it serves. Not for the faint-hearted.
It's so easy for couples to plan for their wedding day, yet lose sight of the need to plan for life's vicissitudes in marriage.. The full transcript is available at this link: https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2022/11/13/matters-of-the-heart-devotional-for-singles-and-married-couples-mitigating-risks-in-marriage/
What do you do during those fragile times in your relationship or marriage when things are not looking good at all (e.g your loved one is dealing with depression, personal grief, stress, a season of personal growth or intense financial pressure)? Do you battle your partner, find a way to end the relationship or marriage or give up in despair? This podcast takes a look at ways to stay connected with your loved one even when the relationship or marriage is going through a rough patch or dark phase.
Much as every lover wants to have hitch-free relationships and marriages, disagreements are inevitable. Disagreements however need not always be viewed negatively, sometimes they are disguised opportunities for understanding a loved one better. This podcast takes a look at a number of strategies lovers can embrace when having disagreements, such as tackling the issue, not their partners and keeping their hearts grounded in their partner's love even as they disagree.
At the heart of most relationship troubles are individuals who come from troubled family backgrounds. Negative relationship and family patterns however do not have to be repeated as new ones can always be created …and it all starts with a decision.
Read the transcript to this devotional at: https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2022/10/22/matters-of-the-heart-devotional-for-singles-and-married-couples/
The word 'love' is perhaps the most misused and possibly least understood word in romantic relationships. This podcast takes a look at the nature of love and some traits God expects in love relationships such as loyalty, not finding faults and forgiveness.
One of the greatest things relationship and marriage partners can do is to constantly refresh each other. This podcast takes a look at how to refresh your loved one using their personal love language.
For reference: https://5lovelanguages.com/quizzes/love-language
God has given humans two important gifts - hearts and brains and both are to be used in dealing with others, including our love ones in a relationship. This podcast takes a look at the second kind of knowledge needed in order to successfully thrive in a relationship or marriage - knowledge of how the opposite sex thinks and operates.
Romance is not enough to power singles and married couples through their dating and marriage relationships. Knowledge is also needed. This podcast takes a look at the types of knowledge singles and married couples need in order to succeed in their relationships.
Unmarried individuals usually find themselves coming under intense pressure from family members to marry, while also enduring ridicule from friends and stigmatization from the larger society on account of their marital status. This podcast takes a look at the phenomenon of 'marriage -shaming' and offers a few insights on respecting the individual design God has for each life and the gifts He confers on individuals when it comes to accomplishing His divine purpose for their lives.
This podcast continues to take a look at the most listened to podcast of the year and offers additional insights into sources of sexual temptation in marriage which include : sexual frustration arising from mismatched sexual drives or using sex as a weapon to 'punish' one's spouse when disagreements arise. Slightly mature content
As Matters of the Heart turns a year on the 5th of September, this podcast takes a look at the most listened to podcast of the year 'Dealing with sexual temptation in your relationship' (Season 1: Episode 6) and provides reflections and further insights on a struggle many relationship partners find themselves having to deal with.
This podcast takes a look at further long term questions singles need to sincerely ask themselves before embarking on a relationship. These questions include: What kind of spouse do I want to be? What kind of marriage and family do I want? The podcast also offers singles coming from dysfunctional family backgrounds insights on how to lay a new marital and family foundation.
Before embarking on a relationship, it is good to prepare and plan ahead for the relationship, rather than leaving things to spontaneity alone. This podcast takes a look at 3 key questions singles need to ask themselves before going into a relationship: 1. Why do I want to be in a relationship? 2. What will being in a relationship cost me? 3. Do I have what it takes to be in a relationship? For serious minded singles
Sometimes there is the mistaken belief among females that physical beauty is the only way to attract a relationship partner. Some women are however designed to be seen through the work of their hands. Drawing on Scripture, this podcast takes a look at a somewhat unconventional route for attracting a relationship partner - the industry route using Rachael, Rebekah and Ruth as examples.
The broken heart syndrome is real - sometimes the root cause of relationship failures can be a broken heart which began right from childhood. This podcast offers some sights to singles with traumatic childhoods who are experiencing repeated relationship failures
S-0-R-R-Y ...simple as the word is, is a struggle for some to say when they are wrong. There are also those who easily apologize but do nothing about the offending behaviour. This podcast takes a look at both extremes in relationships and offers a perspective on human nature which relationship partners need to take into account when relating with each other.
Just like the sun which humans tend to take for granted, it is very easy to take a loved one and the things they do for granted. A little appreciation however has a far - reaching effect and this podcast takes a look at various ways singles and married couples can show appreciation for each other and in the process sweeten their relationship
One of the hardest battles married couples will likely have to fight is the issue of marital faithfulness. Sometimes the unfaithfulness is as old as the marriage itself and in other instances, unfaithfulness occurs within the life of the marriage. Either way there is a breach of trust and this podcast takes a look at unfaithfulness that is as old as the marriage itself.
Lots of times, people enter into relationships with unrealistic expectations. This podcast takes a look at two key traits singles and married individuals need to have when entering into a relationship or marriage: regular, ongoing communication and forgiveness. Slightly mature content.
When people experience betrayal in their relationships, some give up totally on the idea of love while others decide to retaliate - they decide to play games with the hearts of others. This podcast addresses the latter group - the players, particularly, the once faithful, committed lover.
What do you do when the one you love takes a walk out of your life - strike back, nurse a grudge or refuse to move on? This podcast offers encouragement to singles and marriage partners who find themselves emotionally shattered and stuck in a rut when their partners leave the relationship.
Prior to commencing a relationship and when in a relationship, singles need to consider a number of factors in order to reduce the possibility of a heartbreak and making poor marital choices. This podcast takes a look at some of these factors namely: discerning motives and relationship background of potential partners ii. behavioural patterns of relationship partners and regular evaluation of the relationship
Drawing on insights from the book of Esther, this podcasts provides singles with practical steps they need to take when preparing to date. These steps include: (i) Taking good care of your diet (ii) Taking care of your appearance (iii) Taking care of your inner spirit
To successfully raise a child requires knowledge, wisdom (the practical application of knowledge), foresight and skills. This podcast takes a look at proactive measures today's singles and married couples need to consider when it comes to parenting in the digital era.
One of the most sacred responsibilities that can be given to an individual is to be a parent. This responsibility includes moulding the life of another and the influence of a parent lives on after death - lasting for generations in some cases. This podcast takes a look at what being a parent means and what caring for a life entrusted into your hands as a parent entails. Wisdom nuggets for singles.
There is a difference between preparing for a wedding and preparing for marriage. One is an event, the other lasts for a lifetime. This podcast takes a look at issues singles need to consider when thinking of marriage: i) Emotional maturity 2) Spiritual responsibility 3) Financial responsibility 4) Sex
This podcast provides practical insights to married individuals from dysfunctional family backgrounds on how to prevent the recurrence of the experiences they went through as children in their own lives as adults. These insights include (i) Letting go of negative behavioural patterns they were exposed to as children and embracing a new beginning of learning new behaviours (ii)Asking God for the wisdom and knowledge to lead and influence properly (iii) Drawing up a marriage and family constitution
One of the most distressing things to happen to an individual is to grow up witnessing strife in the home.This podcast takes a look at how to break free from a dysfunctional past and prevent a recurrence of toxic behaviour's in one's life.
Everyone has something unique about them, just as God who created every human being is unique. Therefore trying to run your relationship from the standpoint of gender stereotypes is to rob oneself of the opportunity to get to know one’s spouse or relationship partner better and meet their real needs. This podcast takes a look at the concept of ‘relationship intelligence’ and how it can be applied by singles and married couples in their relationships. Elements of relationship intelligence include:
i. Acquiring specific information about your partner (through observation, discussion, etc.) in order to relate with them with proper understanding
ii. Being able to read emotions and body language
iii. Asking God for wisdom and applying the four aspects of wisdom (insight, discretion, knowledge and common sense) to one’s relationship
iv. Continuous learning about the dynamics of relationships (which can be gained through books and workshops)
Teenagers tend to be self-conscious about their looks and changing bodies once they hit adolescence. One way parents can help their teen children develop healthy body images of themselves is to navigate them through the terrain of puberty and body changes. This podcast takes a look at how parents can initiate conversations with their teen children on body changes and mentor them through the process of physical development.
Body development resources:
Females : https://www.healthline.com/health/parenting/stages-of-puberty#summary
Males: https://www.verywellfamily.com/stages-of-puberty-in-boys-the-changing-male-body-3200880
Easter is a season where we remember the greatest act of reconciliation brokered between God and man by Jesus Christ, the Son of God. In this period of reconciliation, this podcast offers a word to hurting singles and married partners who put in their best into their relationships but get the short end of the stick. A word of encouragement is also offered to the one who seeks to mend fences with a loved one.
When singles decide to have sex in their relationship and a pregnancy occurs, some of the responses to such a development include abortion of the pregnancy or abandonment of the relationship and the relationship partner. In the first part of the Parenting series ' Raising your child as a single parent', this podcast takes a look at one of the causes of single parenthood and offers singles insights on how to respond to a pregnancy in their relationship and situations where they are abandoned by their partners on account of the pregnancy.
The podcast takes a further look at changing narratives related to gender identities and how to handle the gender conversation with your child. Insights are also provided into how to handle situations where your child's biological sex and psychological make-up do not match (e.g a female interested in male-related activities or exhibiting masculine behaviour and vice versa)
Further reading: https://www.focusonthefamily.com/parenting/a-biblical-perspective-on-transgender-identity-a-primer-for-parents-and-strugglers/
Being a parent does not involve having children alone, it also involves raising them with some intentionality. This podcast takes a look at practical ways to raise children in the 21st century namely: grounding them in the basics of gender identity, having healthy and respectful views of themselves and the opposite sex as well as learning to have faith in themselves.
This podcast examines more practical ways of keeping the spark alive in your marriage. These include role reversals in the home to prevent burnout and quick conflict resolution between spouses.
Visit the following link for more insights: https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2022/03/20/keeping-the-spark-alive-in-your-marriage-continued/
Recognizing that the marriage relationship goes through seasons and knowing what to do in each season is one way of keeping the spark alive in marriage. Building in times and moments of rest in the relationship also prevents married couples from burning out and this podcast takes a practical look at how married couples can build in times of rest into their daily routines and love lives. Very mature content.
Just as life on earth is governed by seasons, every marriage passes through seasons and it is important to recognize the season your marriage per time - whether it's spring time, summer, the fall or winter. Each season serves its own purpose in marriage and part of keeping the spark alive in your marriage is recognizing that your marriage will go through seasons. This podcast takes a look at the 'ebb and flow' nature of relationships and offers practical insights on how couples can help keep the spark alive in their marriages. Suitable for singles to glean marital nuggets from.
A key area of concern for many individuals is their body shape with some willing to go under the knife in order to fit in with societal descriptions of what is 'beautiful' and be accepted by current or prospective partners. This podcast takes a look at 3 main body types that most people fall under: ectomorphs, endomorphs and mesomorphs along with the peculiarities associated with each body type and recommendations on how to make the various body types beautiful.
Listen to the Live Edition of Matters of the Heart later tonight by 9.30pm (GMT) for more discussions on the topic
Casual sex is quite common nowadays - from friends with benefits arrangements, to hook ups, the list is endless. Casual sex is however an aberration of God's intended purpose for sex and this podcast takes a look at the concept of casual sex and its implications for individuals.
Valentine's Day is here again and with it comes an avalanche of gifts to help express one's emotions: flowers, chocolates, jewelry, intimate briefs, perfume and so much more. But beyond relying on gifts to do the talking, you can also speak your partner's love language to communicate how much you value them. This podcast provides practical examples of how to celebrate your partner in a unique and intentional way on Valentine's day using the 5 love languages.
Tune in for the Live Edition of Matters of the Heart on Ruby FM (http://mixlr.com/ruby-fm) to share ideas on how to celebrate Valentine's Day later today by 9pm
The Lovers' Conversation continues in this podcast with a check on the Love Barometer on how well relationship partners treat each other in the area of being polite, selfless, non-irritable and forgiving towards each another.
You can tune in to a Live edition of Matters of the Heart on Mixlr on Sunday 13th February to share your heart burdens and concerns: http://mixlr.com/ruby-fm/events/matters-of-the-heart-live--2
A relationship can be likened to a garden - when properly taken care of, it can yield great beauty and delight to its owners. This podcast helps singles and married couples take a realistic assessment of their relationship in a fun, healthy way using 'The Love Barometer' so that they can can become better lovers
Satan is engaged in a full-blown war with God over the earth and it is a contention over territory. The earth rightfully belongs to God as the Creator (Psalm 24:1) and man has been appointed as God's viceroy to rule in His stead on earth. The execution of that task requires team effort which is why human beings were created in pairs from the beginning- male and female. When a man and woman come together in the unity of marriage, their union poses a threat to Satan because their union furthers God's agenda and expands God's sphere of influence on the earth through the family unit. This podcast offers spiritual insights based upon the Bible as to why the institution of marriage faces fierce attack.
Visit WordPress to read a blog on the topic: https://mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/2022/01/23/why-the-marriage-institution-is-under-attack-a-spiritual-perspective/
Marriages are contracted on a regular basis but the speed with which they are contracted is also the same speed with which they are dissolved. This episode adopts a spiritual lens premised upon the Word of God to explain the purpose of marriage which is three-fold: (1) To provide human companionship (2) To further God's agenda to populate the earth and to know Him (3) To serve as a visual illustration of the kind of relationship God desires to have with man: a close knit, intimate connection. A good learning resource for singles.
In this podcast, more practical steps are provided to help navigate the online dating scene. These steps include (i)The need for discernment (ii) Clearly defining what you're looking for and finding the dating app(s) which meet that goal (iii) Creating an interesting profile (iv) Being security -conscious
Picking a prospective partner online can be a daunting task, even with the help of dating apps and algorithms. In an age where the lines between fiction and reality are constantly being blurred, this podcast takes a look at practical ways to navigate the dating scene online.
Christmas is a time most people look forward to because it is an opportunity to reunite with family and friends and enjoy good food along with good company. For some others, Christmas can be hard to celebrate because it reminds them of the demise of a loved one or the break up of a relationship. This podcast reaches out to every aching heart during this season and offers a word of comfort. …Merry Christmas to everyone from Matters Of The Heart
The internet and social media are an integral part of our lives now - people want to talk, chat, entertain others and everyone wants their voice and opinions heard. There is a flurry of information and content everywhere and this is the world in which today's children are growing up: they are exposed to content and creating content themselves. Today's episode takes a look at how to raise children and teenagers in a digital world.
Reading resources: https://www.chconline.org/resourcelibrary/worried-about-your-teen-on-social-media-heres-how-to-help/
The marriage relationship can come under a lot of strain from internal sources (e.g. the marriage partners), external sources or both. While common sources of marital tension include sexual intimacy, finances, rival lovers or excessive interference from extended family members, these are not the only sources of marital tension. Parenting styles can also cause a face-off between marriage partners. This episode takes a look at four major parenting styles and how conflict can arise in marriage on account of parenting styles.
Reference for Parenting Style Quiz: https://psychcentral.com/quizzes/parenting-style-quiz#1
What do you do when you've given your very best but your relationship still crashes? How do you pick yourself up again after a heartbreak? These questions are what this podcast seeks to provide practical answers to.
Recognizing and respecting boundaries make for harmonious relationships between marriage partners and their spouse's family. Conflicts however arise when these boundaries are disrespected. This podcast examines possible ways in which family and marital tensions arise when boundaries guarding the marriage relationship are ignored.
In-laws can serve as a strong support system to married couples. This podcast offers married couples and in-laws practical insights into having harmonious relationships with each other.
What do you do when the wait is long? Everyone seems to be married including those younger than you, but you just seem to be stuck in a cycle of 'endless' waiting. Do you twiddle your thumbs and watch all the hours tick away as you wait or look for a 'situation-ship' to avoid prying eyes and judgement from others about your love life? This podcast offers mature singles desirous of marriage insights into dealing with 'the long wait' in their lives.
This episode takes a look at other types of abuse in relationships specifically domestic violence and financial abuse in marriage relationships.
This episode takes a look at some common forms of abuse in dating and marriage relationships such as physical abuse, psychological or emotional abuse and verbal abuse.
Abuse in relationships is a sensitive topic and it can be perpetrated by both genders. In a forthcoming series, various types of abuse are discussed extensively alongside possible solutions.
This episode explores other causes of sexual boredom in marriage which include a lack of creativity and communication. Practical insights are offered on possible ways to deal with these causes. Very mature content.
This episode presents additional ways singles can deal with sexual temptation in their relationship, while for married couples, boredom - one of the reasons some marriage partners stray outside their marriage relationship to have sex, and the root causes of sexual boredom are discussed, alongside practical solutions. Very mature content.
The struggle with sexual temptation is real for both singles and married couples. For singles, especially those who have decided to put off having sex until they are married, the struggle can be really hard. This episode takes a look at practical steps singles can take to maintain their sexual purity in their relationship on their journey to the altar. Mature content.
What we believe propels our actions - either positive or negative. In this episode, we take a look at some common lenses through which people view their relationships: the auto-pilot view, the economic view and the sexual view.
This episode examines the parameters people use increasingly in modern times to pick marriage partners for themselves and offers practical Word- based insights into the real parameters singles should consider when trying to choose a life partner. Mature content.
In this episode, we continue taking a look at the three other building blocks of a successful relationship - honesty, understanding yourself and maturity.
Want to know how to make your relationship thrive? Join me in a back- to- basics class where we examine the first of several building blocks of a successful relationship: the fear of God and see how this block works out in practical terms between two lovers
Hi my name is Dr. Y and I am passionate about love relationships - you can call me a relationship enthusiast.