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A personal depiction of life in Poland set against the Nazi and Soviet takeovers of Europe and their cataclysmic aftermaths. It is the compelling memoir of Alexander Kimel, taking him from a shtetl in the Polish Ukraine to a Nazi ghetto to liberation.It is also the harrowing story of his wife, Eva, whose father is murdered in the “Holocaust by Bullets.” A dialog across generations with narrative written by their son, the book is a rare portrayal of Jewish survivors who remained in Communist Poland after the war.
It is a story of the many challenges they faced and the life they built together after quitting Poland in 1956 for Israel, ultimately emigrating to America. By including the stories of other family members, the book also provides a panoramic view of Polish Jewry before, during, and after the war.
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Use the Code KIMEL20 and get 20% off the book until the end of 2025. Kindle version coming soon!The following excerpt from The Pessimist’s Son: A Holocaust Memoir of Hope by Alexander Kimel and Martin Kimel shared only with Remember.org. Copyright 2025 Martin Kimel. All Rights Reserved. For questions please contact the author here.
CHAPTER 1
The ShtetlPodhajce was a town forgotten by time, tucked between a high mountain and a large lake, with a horse-drawn fire engine, a half-blind town crier, and one automobile. The huge market square—rynek, in Polish—was the soul of the town.
Here, every Thursday, hundreds of peasants sold their eggs, chickens, and butter and bought their dry goods. At the same time, their horses deposited in the market a huge supply of manure, the sole source of pollution in town.
The only car in the shtetl—when it ran—was a reason for excitement and the pride of the town. When it appeared running at a top speed of fifteen miles per hour, children tried to outrun it and touch this huffing and puffing symbol of modernity.
A mix of Poles, Jews, and Ukrainians, living in a hateful harmony, inhabited the town; they needed and hated each other. They lived in dilapidated, whitewashed clay huts with flickering kerosene lamps.
The few rich people lived in high, two-story stucco buildings with electric lights and hand-cranked telephones.
The town had an assortment of “celebrities” from all walks of life: B., the half-witted town fool, master of profanity; E., the town’s crazy man; W., the one-handed invalid peddling an antisemitic newspaper; the Burstiner Rebbe, the religious leader, and his gabbai, or business manager, Joel.1
What did the town’s people live on? The Poles owned the land; the Ukrainians toiled on their small lots and on the big estates of the Polish land- owners; and the Jews traded.They traded everything and with everybody and even among themselves. A bushel of wheat worth ten zlotys went through many hands, increasing the price by a whole fifty groshen (half a zloty).
The Jews lived in a close-knit, diverse society. It was comprised of the gevirim—the rich men; the balabatim—the well-to-do citizens; the balmelochis—the tradesmen, the butchers, the shoemakers, the tailors; the shnorrers (“beggars,” in Yiddish)—the market women and the middlemen living from day to day.
Most of the Jews were poor. Even the successful merchants were not millionaires. How much money can you make selling five cents worth of sugar?
Despite the general poverty, life was passable. Entertainment was plentiful, and food was cheap. For fifty groshen, you could buy a pail of fresh cherries; a sack of potatoes was seventy-five groshen; and a live chicken also cost seventy-five groshen.
The only problem was how to earn the needed money. People were known by their trades, which were passed down from generation to generation: “Velve the katzif”—Velve the butcher; “Meir the schnader”—Meir the tailor; “Shloyme the balagule”—Shloyme the coach- man.
There also was no generation gap. There is less room for generations not to understand each other when each generation has the same livelihood.
Martin’s Note: Many people had nicknames unrelated to their professions. Nicknames in shtetls could be brutal,2 and Podhajce was no exception. It seems that many people there got nicknames relating to their worst personal traits. For example, writing in Sefer Podhajce, the yizkor book of Podhajce, Baruch Milch mentions Yehuda the Lo (Judah the “no”), who was referred to as such because he always expressed a negative opinion and stressed the vowel in lo (“no,” in Hebrew).
Milch also tells the story of a shoe wholesaler from Lwów (now Lviv, Ukraine) who was dunning a Mr. Leon Weiss, a leather and shoe merchant, for late payments. He asked many people in Podhajce where Leon Weiss lived, but nobody recognized the name.
Eventually, he discovered that Weiss was known in the town by his nickname, Leibele Trask—“Leibele the Smack,” because he got upset easily and threatened to “smack” people.3
Apparently, my dad got off easy: he had a nickname related to his Hebrew name, “Shiko” (derived from Joshua). I believe that my grandfather, who was born Leib Hersh, was referred to in Podhajce as Hersh.
There was no television to isolate people from one other, to make them lonely. At six o’clock, the youth of the town provided the shtetl with an unstaged show. The “Corso,” as the sidewalk area around the rynek was called, was full of young couples walking hand in hand.
It was a colorful pageant. The Corso served many purposes. It was a mating place for young people. Here, the town beauties would select their boyfriends.
It was a non-stop fashion show, too; here, a girl named Dziunia would show off her mother’s creative talent in copying the latest fashion journals. Because of this show, some people called Podhajce “the Paris of Galicia.”4
The Jews in the town lived from week to week, and the most important days in the week were Thursdays and Saturdays. Saturday (the Jewish Sabbath, known as Shabbat) was the holy day. Thursday was the day that you earned the money needed to celebrate the Sabbath.
Each Jew, regardless how poor he was, had to observe the Sabbath with a good meal. So, Thursday was a hustling day; the poor men ran around the horse-driven peasant’s carts, trying to trade, buy, or sell while the merchant stood in front of the meager stores hawking brown leather shoes or colorful cottons for dresses.The women had a field day. They were doing the shopping for Saturday’s treats, bargaining with the peasant women selling loaves of yellow butter wrapped in green leaves, or buying noisy chickens, geese, or ducks.
Buying a chicken was a ritual, an art passed down from mother to daughter. First, you had to weigh the chicken, holding it with your right hand, trying to guess its weight.
Then you had to turn the chicken around, take it under your arm, blow off the feathers around the rear and see how much fat the chicken had. After determining that the chicken had a fat rear end, the bargaining process started in earnest.
The trick was to offer a low price and never let the chicken out of your hand. It was a loud ritual: the peasant woman cursing, trying to get the chicken back, the buyer arguing loudly that the chicken had not even one ounce of fat—and the surprised chicken cackling loudly.
My SchoolingLike other Jewish boys, I started my schooling at the age of three. I attended a cheder—a one-room school in which children got religious training. The cheder was really a combination religious school and nursery.
Our teacher, Nusen the Melamed (Nusen the Teacher), taught groups of children, ages three to twelve. When one group of children was taught, the other group played outside, in the small yard.
The melamed used proven, ancient meth- ods of instruction. We repeated in unison the Hebrew words and the Yiddish translation. For example: “Vaydaber Adonai l’Moishe” (“And God spoke to Moses”).5
END OF EXCERPT: For more visit The Pessimist’s Son.
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Use the Code KIMEL20 and get 20% off the book until the end of 2025.Alexander KimelPRAISE“The Pessimist’s Son: A Holocaust Memoir of Hope is a moving chronicle of Polish Jewry that belongs in every archive, in every library, indeed, in every home. But it is much more than that.
In this powerful volume Martin Kimel brings together two extraordinary tales woven into a third inspiring testimony. The stories of his father and mother are told in the aftermath of the radical assault on the soul that defined the Holocaust.
And they are tales of a kind of healing that each soul offers to the other. The Pessimist’s Son is a memorial and a testimony not only to what happened during those days of destruction but, above all, to why it matters—something that is often forgotten.That is what makes this book a memoir of hope, a remembrance for the sake of the future. That is what makes it so urgent to the world we live in today.”
— David Patterson , Hillel A. Feinberg Distinguished Chair in Holocaust Studies , University of Texas at Dallas
“A compelling memoir of Jewish life in Russian occupied Poland in World War 2, the German invasion of Russia and life underground during the ensuing Holocaust of bullets.
Alexander Kimel’s story is interwoven at every step with his son Martin’s magnificent work of narrative nonfiction to provide a wide-angle view with other first-hand accounts and the larger historical context, including the parallel survivor journey of Alexander’s wife, Eva.Beautifully written and deeply researched, The Pessimist’s Son is a riveting testament to the ingenuity and resilience of the human spirit when faced with impossible circumstances. Everyone should read it.”
— Scott Lenga, Author of The Watchmakers
Alexander Kimel was born in Podhajce, Poland (now Pidhaitsi, Ukraine) in 1926. After the war, he earned a bachelor’s and master’s degree in electrical engineering at the Wrocław Polytechnic University in Poland. In the U.S., he started and ran his own consulting engineering firm. Poems from his award-winning website on the Holocaust have been used in schools, universities and exhibits, widely reprinted, and recited on YouTube. He also contributed a chapter to the anthology, Life in the Ghettos during the Holocaust. He died in 2018.
Martin Kimel, the son of Alexander and Eva Kimel, is a graduate of the University of Pennsylvania and Stanford Law School. He is a securities lawyer in Washington, D.C. and lives in Maryland. He has written on the Holocaust and other topics for the Washington Post, Los Angeles Times, Baltimore Sun, Wall Street Journal, Times of Israel, Forward, Chicago Tribune and many other publications.
“I Cannot Forget”, two poems by Alexander Kimel
Alexander Kimel – Prayer
The post The Pessimist’s Son by Alexander Kimel and Martin Kimel appeared first on Remember.org - A People's History.
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We’re releasing this video interview with Richard Lowy, author of “Kalman & Leopold – Surviving Mengele’s Auschwitz” and son of Leopold Lowy, on Yom HaShoah – Holocaust Remembrance Day – for a reason.
While the January liberation of Auschwitz has become widely recognized internationally, Yom HaShoah remains a distinctly Jewish day of remembrance with deep historical significance.
It is also our 30th anniversary of Remember.org, preserving and sharing the stories of survivors and their children.
Today, on this solemn day of memory and reflection, we remember the extraordinary journey of Kalman and Leopold – two individuals who exemplify what surviving Mengele’s Auschwitz truly meant.When I first encountered their story, narrated to Richard K. Lowy, I was struck by its understated power.
Get “Kalman & Leopold” on AmazonUnlike many Holocaust narratives that have entered our collective consciousness through dramatized films and emotional retellings, this account offers something different – a quiet, clear-eyed testimony of two individuals whose paths crossed in one of history’s darkest corners.
Two Hungarian Boys, Two Sets of TwinsKalman and Leopold were both Hungarian Jews, each born as part of a twin pair. When the Nazi occupation of Hungary began in March 1944, neither knew that their status as twins would both endanger and save them.
The Hungarian deportations happened with stunning efficiency – within weeks, entire communities that had existed for centuries were emptied.
Their residents were packed onto trains bound for Auschwitz-Birkenau, where most deportees faced immediate selection upon arrival.
Those deemed unfit for labor – the elderly, young children, pregnant women, the visibly ill – were sent directly to the gas chambers.
But twins were set aside for a different purpose, one that would bring Kalman and Leopold together.
Excerpt from the book shared hereSurviving Mengele’s “Scientific” InterestDr. Josef Mengele had secured for himself a unique position at Auschwitz. While functioning as a camp doctor who participated in selections, he also ran what amounted to a personal research laboratory focused primarily on twins.
What’s often overlooked in discussions of Mengele is that he wasn’t a scientific outlier, but rather the product of a respected academic lineage.
The eugenics movement that shaped his research began in earnest in the 1880s with Sir Francis Galton, Darwin’s cousin, who coined the term “eugenics” and advocated for “improving” human populations through selective breeding.
By the early 20th century, eugenics had gained scientific legitimacy across Europe and the United States, with research institutes, academic journals, and even laws supporting its principles.
Mengele studied under Dr. Otmar von Verschuer at the Institute for Hereditary Biology and Racial Hygiene in Frankfurt, who in turn had studied under Eugen Fischer, one of Germany’s leading racial anthropologists.
Fischer’s 1913 studies on mixed-race populations in German Southwest Africa provided a scientific veneer for theories of racial hierarchy decades before the Third Reich.
This academic pedigree gave Mengele’s work at Auschwitz a façade of scientific legitimacy that was recognized within German scientific circles of the time.
Far from being a lone madman, Mengele represented the logical, horrific endpoint of ideas that had been developing in respected academic settings for decades.
In our conversations with Holocaust educators, we’ve found that surviving Mengele’s Auschwitz remains one of the less thoroughly documented aspects of the Holocaust.
This makes firsthand accounts like that of Kalman and Leopold particularly valuable to our historical understanding.
As Leopold matter-of-factly noted in his conversations with his son Richard, he sometimes called Mengele the “Angel of Auschwitz” – not out of any reverence, but because being selected for Mengele’s experiments meant not being sent immediately to the gas chambers.The reality of these experiments was far from angelic. Twins in Mengele’s program endured regular blood draws, injections of unknown substances, measurements of every physical feature, and comparative studies of their reactions to diseases.
Finding Each OtherWhat makes the story of Kalman and Leopold unique is that they weren’t related to each other – they each had their own twin siblings.
They were strangers who met through the cruel circumstance of Mengele’s twin program.
In the dehumanizing environment of Auschwitz, where prisoners were reduced to numbers and every aspect of life was designed to break human connection, they formed a bond that would endure for decades.
Their day-to-day survival wasn’t marked by dramatic acts of resistance.
Instead, it consisted of small, consistent gestures of mutual support – sharing food, warning of dangers, providing a moment of distraction through conversation or humor.
When students ask what helped people survive the camps, often these ordinary but crucial human connections provided reasons to continue when all logical reasons were stripped away.
Separation and RediscoveryWhen liberation came in January 1945, Kalman and Leopold lost track of each other amid the chaos of the war’s end.
The postwar years presented their own challenges – displacement, immigration restrictions, the struggle to rebuild lives from nothing, and the often impossible task of locating lost family and friends across a transformed Europe.
For 56 years, they lived separate lives, each carrying memories of their time in Auschwitz and of each other. The odds against their ever reconnecting seemed insurmountable.
Yet through an almost impossible series of coincidences – the airing of a documentary called “Leo’s Journey” about Leopold Lowy’s life – they found each other again after more than half a century.
Their reunion bridges not just physical distance but the psychological expanse of decades lived in the aftermath of trauma.
Why This Account of Surviving Mengele’s Auschwitz Matters NowWhen teaching the Holocaust to today’s students, we often struggle with how to present the enormity of the event without overwhelming.
Individual stories like that of Kalman and Leopold offer a way in – they allow us to understand the broader historical context through the experiences of real people who lived through it.
Their account of surviving Mengele’s Auschwitz is particularly valuable because so few of his twin subjects have shared their stories.
Most of Mengele’s subjects did not survive the war, and many who did found it difficult to speak about their experiences.
The matter-of-fact way that Kalman and Leopold describe what happened to them – without sensationalism or melodrama – makes their testimony all the more powerful as a teaching tool.
For educators working with middle and high school students, “Kalman & Leopold – Surviving Mengele’s Auschwitz” provides an entry point to discuss not only the historical facts of the Holocaust but also more universal themes.
The story also offers a counterpoint to the more commonly taught narrative of Anne Frank.
While her diary ends with arrest, Kalman and Leopold’s story continues through liberation, separation, and eventual reunion.
Beyond VictimhoodPerhaps most importantly, this book presents Kalman and Leopold not simply as victims, but as complete human beings who experienced one of history’s greatest atrocities and somehow maintained their humanity. Their story isn’t told with the swelling music and dramatic close-ups of a Hollywood film, but with the quiet dignity of lived experience.
In my conversations with Holocaust survivors over the years, I’ve often been struck by their pragmatism and lack of self-dramatization when discussing their experiences. The horrors they witnessed need no embellishment, and their survival required a focus on the practical rather than the emotional.
“Kalman & Leopold – Surviving Mengele’s Auschwitz” captures this quality, making it an authentic and valuable addition to Holocaust literature. For educators, researchers, students, and anyone seeking to understand this chapter of history through the lens of personal experience, this book offers a rare glimpse into an aspect of the Holocaust that few survivors have documented.
It stands as testimony not only to what happened, but to the enduring connections that helped two young men survive – and reconnect against all odds many decades later.
“Kalman & Leopold – Surviving Mengele’s Auschwitz” is available for educational institutions and can be incorporated into Holocaust studies curricula for high school and university-level courses. This rare testimony of surviving Mengele’s Auschwitz provides educators with a valuable primary source that brings history to life through authentic personal experience.
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History lives in silence, so much so that a Mengele Auschwitz firsthand account is rare, and precious.
For decades, Holocaust survivors like Richard Lowy’s father kept their experiences locked away, carrying unimaginable trauma without burdening their children with the horrors they had witnessed.
As Richard recounts,
“Father had the numbers on his arms, and we all knew that he survived World War Two, but we had no idea.”
It wasn’t until after his twin sister Miriam’s death in 1999 that Leopold Lowy finally agreed to share his story—the story of being a Mengele twin at Auschwitz, where he and Kalman witnessed and survived one of history’s darkest chapters.
Get “Kalman & Leopold” on Amazon
In this powerful excerpt, we witness October 7, 1944, through the eyes of two teenage boys who survived Dr. Josef Mengele’s cruel experiments.
Remember.org is proud to present this exclusive chapter from “Kalman and Leopold: Surviving Mengele’s Auschwitz,” a testament to human resilience, with a Mengele Auschwitz firsthand account bearing witness. As fewer survivors remain with us each year, these firsthand accounts become ever more precious in our commitment to remember—and to ensure such atrocities are never repeated.
The following excerpt is printed with permission from Richard K. Lowy.
Find more learning tools at their site, where you can reach the author.
All Rights Reserved. © 2025 Richard K. Lowy
KalmanSaturday, October 7, 1944: The uprisingThe day grow worse, and so do our physical conditions. The weather is deteriorating. In this first week of October, people are dying faster. Our lives mean less. Selections are more frequent. Instead of twice a month, they’re now once a week. The machine is speeding up.
We continue on with another miserable routine workday in the guard shack. I’m busy with a pair of army boots and Lipa is wiping the floor around the coal stove in the duty room. He’s at the front and I’m in the last bedroom at the end of the shack.
In the middle of our workday there is a tremendous explosion. The whole guard shack shudders.
I run into the corridor and Lipa is running towards me. We hunch together in the corridor.
We look at each other and realize the explosion came from behind the guard shack, the crematorium. A few moments later we hear the rapid rat-tat-tat of small-arms fire. Jawohl, Fritz, Müeller, and the other guards understand immediately, grabbing their guns and running out the door.
On his way out, Red-Nose yells, “Verschwinde! Verschwinde von hier! [Get the hell out of here!]” and they’re gone.We’re left alone.
Lipa grabs me by the collar, says, “Come,” and pulls me outside around to the back, cautioning me, “Be careful of the fence.” We stand between the electrified fence and the guard shack in awe and watch.
It’s total mayhem.
Crematorium IV is on fire, smoke is billowing out, the whole thing is an enormous heap of rubble. Small flames sprout out, there is a lot of gunfire, people are running everywhere, machine guns fire from the distant guard tower, it’s madness. We watch as a group of pajamas rush out of the building, overtaking several guards.
This is an uprising.
The Germans are surprised.
Someone in the crematorium must’ve had the wherewithal to say, Look, we’re going to die very soon. Let’s do something against these people.
Whoever arrives to Auschwitz is already a psychologically dismantled person. Their worlds are disrupted and churned up during the several stages of arrival: the ordinances, ghettos, starvation, dehumanization, and the insufferable transports. Uprisings may have occurred in the minds of a few indomitable souls, but the other 99.9 percent are the majority, and they are submissive souls.
Uncle Lajos told me of this group, the Sonderkommandos, a special unit of some comparatively better-fed Jews whose job it is to drag the bodies out of the gas chambers and put them into the ovens. Some had to do this to their own parents, their own children.Then they had to clean the ash created by the bodies out of the ovens. I’ve heard rumours the Sonderkommandos are liquidated every quarter—they know too much. The Germans call them Geheimnisträger, the bearers of secrets. They work in the heart of the machine and are separated from the main population, the rumours insist. From their point of view, and wisely so, the German command cannot afford any of these groups to remain in the job more than a few months, lest the secrets of Birkenau get out to the world.
Several minutes later a host of military trucks comes tearing up the road and stops right in front of us. Soldiers jump down and line up. One yells orders and then, firearms drawn, they set off toward Crematorium IV. Within minutes the large group of soldiers is shooting back, trying to quell this resistance. Lipa and I—two little mice, forgotten by everyone— stand between the electrified fence and the guard shack and watch.
No one is looking at us. They have more urgent things to worry about. Another explosion tears an opening in the electrified fence. Sparks fly and pajamas race out, running toward the woods.Soldiers chase after them, machine guns in hand, firing left, right and center. It looks completely mad. Undirected. Guards from the distant tower continue raining down fire with their machine guns, shooting at anything that moves.
A fair amount of time later, when the place is full of guards and soldiers, the firing stops and everybody who could be caught is killed.
There’s no stopping and asking questions; any running pajama is shot. Bodies lie everywhere. It looks like they all died, but not before they blew up Crematorium IV and forced the killing machine to stop.91 It is a small dent in this seemingly unstoppable machine.
After the uproar winds down, we walk back into our workplace. Shortly thereafter our six hosts return, all very serious, and Jawohl directs them, “Resume your positions.”
He looks at us and says, “No more work. Get lost.” We stand at attention. “Jawohl!”Collecting our bits and pieces from the storage room, Lipa and I leave and walk back to our barrack. It’s rare we return in the middle of the day. As soon as we enter, everybody descends on us. Now we are the source of information.We’re bombarded with questions in seven languages—Hungarian, Czech, Greek, Polish, Russian, Yiddish, and German. “Here, talk to me. What happened? What did you see?”
Everyone wants to know. They could hear but not see what was going on outside the barrack. We can’t report much, but what we do is infinitely more than what anyone else saw. We tell them the Sonderkommandos rebelled and blew up the crematorium, there was a gun fight, and most of them died. Those who understand and speak multiple languages start translating to others. Fear rips through the barrack. We all know someone will pay the price for the Sonderkommandos’ actions.
FootnoteOn October 7, 1944, Jews in the Sonderkommando at Auschwitz-Birkenau organized the biggest and most spectacular mutiny and escape attempt of the camp’s history. They set fire to one of the crematoria, causing serious damage, and attacked SS men in the vicinity.
Some of the prisoners escaped through the fence and reached the outside, but the SS managed to pursue and surround them, murdering all. A total of approximately two hundred fifty Jews died fighting. A few SS were killed and a number more wounded.
After several minutes, the kapo barks, “That’s it, back to your bunks!” I look around and Lipa’s already gone.
Returning to my bunk, Uncle Lajos is waiting for me and quietly says, “Sit. Now tell me what happened. What did you see?”
I report to him in as much detail as I can. We’re anxious about what will come as a result. By late afternoon the barrack returns to its normal affairs. Uncle Lajos and I sit on the bunk and nibble yesterday’s rations.
LeopoldSaturday, October 7, 1944: The uprisingI’m working in the guard shack when there’s a huge explosion outside, followed by shooting and hollering. The guards run out; I follow to see what’s happening.
Fighting has broken out between the prisoners and the guards. About a hundred and eighty young men called Sonderkommandos are assigned to the crematoria. I understand they do the gassing and load the ovens. They knew when they were assigned this detail that it was a death sentence. They know too much, see too much. Rumours say the Germans burn these guys every four months so there are no eyewitnesses to the internal workings of the crematoria. The Germans can’t take a chance of even one of them escaping.
The Sonderkommandos have overpowered their guards. It’s an uprising. A few guards are killed and some Sonderkommandos take their uniforms. Truckloads of soldiers start arriving with machine guns. The Sonderkommandos don’t have a chance. There’s no point of even considering a win—it’s a losing situation.
After the uprising, our guards come back. There’s no more work for us today, and they send us back to our barrack.Later in the afternoon, I hear the kapo call out, “A1295,” which is unusual. If I’m going for a medical check, it’s always been in the morning. I’m taken by a Red Cross van to Crematorium II and into a big medical room with two large stone tables with drains for blood. I remember the rumour of the dissections.
There’s no discussion, no notice.
I’m cleaned up and laid out on one of the tables.
On the other, already lying down, is an SS guard.
He must have been injured in the uprising, brought here for medical treatment.
A doctor takes my arm and puts a needle with a tube in me. The other end of this tube also has a needle and is put into the SS. They start transferring my blood. Lying here I’m scared, not batting an eyelash, getting weaker, shaking, so frightened. Nothing is said to me.
For over an hour they drain me dry to save his life. I don’t see the SS guard’s face. He doesn’t see mine. Just two tables, side by side with two tubes, me to him.When there’s no more to give, they take the tubes out. I am so weak I can’t get off the table. I’m picked up and carried out to the van then literally dropped in front of my barrack with an extra piece of bread. I wonder if I’m going to die right here.
Barely alive, I crawl into the barrack. Some of the other twins help me to my bunk.
I never know what the day will bring, if I will be returned. If I’ll be brought back with a limb missing, with something done to me. I don’t know when a real experiment will happen, when I’ll be harmed physically, and that will be it.
The following excerpt is printed with permission from Richard K. Lowy.
Find more learning tools at their site, where you can reach the author.
All Rights Reserved. © 2025 Richard K. Lowy
Get “Kalman & Leopold” on AmazonIn this powerful excerpt, we witness October 7, 1944, through the eyes of two teenage boys – Mengele Auschwitz firsthand accounts – who survived Mengele’s cruel experiments.
Remember.org is proud to present this exclusive chapter from “Kalman and Leopold: Surviving Mengele’s Auschwitz,” a testament to human resilience and the vital importance of bearing witness. As fewer survivors remain with us each year, these firsthand accounts become ever more precious in our commitment to remember—and to ensure such atrocities are never repeated.
Surviving Mengele’s Auschwitz: The Story of Kalman and Leopold
The post Mengele Auschwitz Firsthand Account: “The Uprising” appeared first on Remember.org - A People's History.
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Welcome to a deep dive into a story about the Holocaust in Czechoslovakia, a story that’s heartbreaking, but also really inspiring.
We’re diving into My Name is Alice, a memoir by Holocaust survivor Alice Muller.
So we’re really trying to get inside Alice’s world, right?
See it through her eyes.
A Message from Alice Muller
When I was six, my teacher wore a Hlinka Garda pin on his lapel. I wondered how he would be to me, it gave me a bad feeling, so I was always on the alert and I made sure not to sit in front. He was nice to the children during class, but I made sure to do the homework well so that he should not start up with me.
But at that time, I came home to my father and in the morning I was sent off by my father, and I felt ok. But this situation did not last. You can read more about me in MY NAME IS ALICE, a book I recommend to adults and older high school children.
I hope that I will hear from other survivors here, as well as from anyone else who has a question on the Holocaust, like children and grandchildren of Holocaust survivors, and American students of history.
I am writing an update now on my book, but in the meantime, I have written AL TISHKACH VAL TISLACH: A HOLOCAUST SURVIVOR’S STUDY GUIDE TO THE HOLOCAUST AS RELAYED BY THE JEWISH CALENDAR, and two books for children, My Name is Yisroel Yosef, about my husband Joseph, and Malka and the Holocaust Survivors, about the importance of offering help to living survivors.
I thank you for your interest about what I went through. I wish a Happy New Year to those who read my words who are Jewish, and good wishes for all.
My Name is Alice Paperback – Chapters One and Two along with photos of Alice Mullerby Alice Muller (Author), Dr. Tzipporah Bat-Ami (Author)
Get “My Name is Alice” bookSee on AmazonGetting the historical context is important, but those little personal details, that’s what makes it real.
So Alice’s story, it starts in the 1930s, Czechoslovakia, in this town, Michalovce.She describes it as pretty charming, you know, cobblestone streets, that kind of thing.
But before we get too far, her name, Alice, has a whole story behind it.Oh, is this about those rules they had in Czechoslovakia then?
Like the restrictions on Jewish names?
See, her dad, Herman, he wanted to name her Rachel.
Totally normal, right?
But biblical names. Not allowed for Jewish families.
From Wikimedia CommonsLike, can you imagine having that choice taken away?
Even something as basic as your child’s name.
Search and Unite | Czech Property and Looted Art in Austria
It’s just shows how deep the anti-Semitism ran, you know.It was in everything.
Makes you think about all the other compromises people had to make just to exist.
So the clerk, he suggests Rosalie because it starts with R, you see.
But Alice’s mom, she puts her foot down.
My daughter, she says, her name is Alica.
Alica. It’s a fashionable name then.
Maybe a little act of defiance, but also, a mother’s love,
wanting the best for her kid, even with all that’s going on.
And speaking of her childhood, Alice’s memoir really goes into detail about her home, like describing the rooms, the furniture.
She even mentioned this one thing that struck me, a vanity mirror.
Her father bought it for her mother.
A vanity mirror seems like such a, everyday object, especially with everything else going on.
Why do you think that detail stands out?
On the surface, it seems almost insignificant, you know.
But I think it speaks to this desire for normalcy, wanting to hold on to beauty even when everything’s getting darker.Imagine that.Fear, uncertainty everywhere, and this mirror, it’s a symbol of their love, of their life.
And it still means something.
It reminds us that even in the darkest times, those little joys, those connections, they offer hope.
And, well, that hope, it becomes even more important as Alice’s story goes on.
And before we get to those tougher times, you mentioned how Czechoslovakia in the 1930s had all these rules about Jewish names.
Can you tell us a bit more about that?Like, what was it actually like to be a Jewish family living there then?Before we jump into those tougher times with the Nazi occupation and all,
it’s important to understand what life was like before.
You mentioned timelines, maps, that kind of thing from the Amazon page.
Can you paint us a picture of Jewish life in 1930s Czechoslovakia?So Czechoslovakia back then, it was considered more tolerant than a lot of Europe, but anti-Semitism was there, definitely growing.
And it showed up in different ways, you know, social stuff, economic restrictions.
It all cast a shadow over these communities.
Imagine that constant pressure, feeling like an outsider in your own country just because of your faith.
SOURCE: Wikimedia CommonsAnd those name restrictions, that was part of it, right?
A very real example of how it was seeping into every part of life.
Source: Wikimedia Commons Yeah, like this slow erosion of freedom.
A slow tightening of the noose.
But even with all that, you see families like Alice’s trying to live their lives, to create that loving home for their kids.
Remember that vanity mirror?
It’s not just a mirror, right?It’s the symbol of resilience.Like even when things are falling apart around you, the human spirit, it looks for beauty, looks for hope.
You know, that’s what gets me.
It wasn’t some big grand gesture, just this ordinary thing.
But because of what’s happening around them, it takes on this whole other meaning.
It’s like even small acts of kindness.
Interior of the Olomouc Synagogue, burned in March 1939They have so much power, especially in times of turmoil.
You cling to those little bits of light.
And that’s something you see a lot in Holocaust stories.
It’s not always the big heroic acts.
It’s those everyday moments, the human connection that helps people get through those horrors.And as Alice’s story goes on, I’m sure we’ll see more of that.Now, you mentioned that excerpt from Remember.org.
It kind of ends abruptly.
What does the full book tell us based on that Amazon page?
So the Amazon page, it mentions My Name is Alice, includes those timelines you like, historical context.
But it also like hints at things getting worse, you know, as the Nazis take over.
Erstes Originalbild vom Einmarsch der deutschen Truppen in Brünn,
“Fort die Tschechei, Brünn ist frei!” so hallten die Sprechchöre durch die Stadt Brünn als die Soldaten Grossdeutschlands ihren Einzug in diese alte Stadt hielten. Zu beiden Seiten des Weges standen gedrängt die Menschenmassen und grüssten die Retter.
UBz: die deutschen Truppen in Brünn.
Scherl Bilderdienst, Berlin, 16.3.39, 3462-39That’s where those reviews you sent come in, reading them.
It’s like we’re getting all these different takes on Alice’s story.
Everyone’s coming to it with their own experiences.
Some people, they were focused on the history.
Others, it was Alice’s strength that got to them.
There’s this one review, though. By Declan Dunn.
Amazon ReviewHe’s the founder of Remember.org, right?
He’s dedicated his life to sharing these stories.
He called Alice’s book a special work.
Said it touched his heart.
And coming from him, someone who’s heard so many survivor stories.
It carries weight, definitely.
It makes you realize that even within all the Holocaust literature out there,
each story, it’s unique.
It really is.
And it’s through those personal stories that we start to grasp what prejudice, what hate really does, how it destroys individuals, families, whole communities.It’s easy to forget that sometimes when you’re looking at the bigger picture.
You mentioned a review that praised the historical detail, how those timelines, those maps, they help make it real.
For someone like you who values that accuracy.
It makes all the difference.
I mean, reading about history in a textbook, it’s one thing.
But experiencing it, even indirectly, through someone who lived it, those little details, those glimpses into daily life when everything’s falling apart, that’s how we understand the human cost.
And speaking of those human experiences, another review, it focused on Alice’s resilience.
Even with all that darkness, her spirit, it shines through.
It’s incredible, isn’t it, that even in those moments, the will to survive,
to hold on to hope, it can endure.
Resilience.
It’s a common thread in these stories.
But it never fails to amaze me, that strength, that hope, in the face of such horror.
It reminds you of what we’re capable of.
And that’s what makes Alice’s story and all these stories so important to hear, right?
They remind us of the terrible things we can do to each other, but also the strength we have, the importance of empathy, of understanding.It makes you think about your own life, how you face your challenges, how you learn, how you treat other people.
It’d be easy to despair after hearing a story like Alice’s, but I think there’s a call to action in there, too.
Holocaust Study Guide by Alice Muller on AmazonTo be better, kinder, to see the humanity in everyone, no matter what.
Alice’s story, it comes from a dark place in history, sure.
Memories of My Childhood in the Holocaust by Judith Jagermann | Theresienstadt ghetto
But ultimately, it’s about resilience, about hope, about understanding different perspectives.
So as you go about your day, let Alice’s story stay with you, not just as a memory, but as a reminder of that strength we all have, the importance of empathy and building a better world together.All materials, words, and photos from:
Get “My Name is Alice” book See on AmazonThe post Holocaust in Czechosolvakia – My Name is Alice Memoir appeared first on The Holocaust History - A People's and Survivor History - Remember.org.
Remember.org
Discover the inspiring and heartbreaking journey of Abram Korn, a Holocaust survivor whose story is brought to life through the Abram Korn: A Holocaust Survivor website.
This digital memorial offers a comprehensive look into the life of a man who endured unimaginable suffering yet emerged with unwavering resilience.
Go to Abe’s Story
Get “Abe’s Story” book
Uncover a Holocaust Survivor’s JourneyThe story of Abram Korn is a harrowing testament to the horrors of the Holocaust and the enduring strength of the human spirit.
Korn, born in 1918 in Grodno, Poland, was a young man when his life was uprooted by the Nazi invasion of his home country. In the years that followed, Korn would endure unimaginable suffering, witnessing the brutality of the Nazis firsthand.
However, Korn’s story is not one of despair. It is also a story of resilience and hope. After surviving the Holocaust, Korn immigrated to the United States and rebuilt his life.
He became a successful businessman and a loving father. Korn’s son, Joey, eventually compiled his father’s memoirs into a book titled “Abe’s Story: A Holocaust Memoir.”
The Abram Korn: A Holocaust Survivor website is a powerful resource that tells the story of Abram Korn’s life.
The website includes an interactive map that traces Korn’s journey from his hometown in Poland to the concentration camps where he was imprisoned.
The website also features excerpts from Korn’s memoirs, providing readers with a firsthand account of his experiences.
In addition to the interactive map and excerpts, the website also includes a section on the teaching the background of the Holocaust.
This section provides essential context for understanding Korn’s story. It discusses the rise of the Nazi Party, the invasion of Poland, and the establishment of the ghettos and concentration camps.
The Abe’s Story website is a valuable resource for anyone who wants to learn more about the Holocaust. The website’s interactive map, excerpts from Korn’s memoirs, and background section comprehensively examine Korn’s life and experiences.
Here is a more detailed look at the key features of the website: Interactive Map:* The website’s interactive map allows users to trace Korn’s journey from his hometown in Poland to the concentration camps where he was imprisoned. The map includes stops in Grodno, Warsaw, Auschwitz, and Buchenwald. Users can learn more about Korn’s experiences at that location by clicking on each stop.
The interactive map on the Abram Korn website is a powerful tool for understanding Korn’s journey during the Holocaust.
The map includes markers for crucial locations in Korn’s life, including his hometown of Grodno, Poland, and the concentration camps where he was imprisoned.
The interactive map is a valuable resource for students and teachers alike. It can be used to teach about the geography of the Holocaust and the different stages of Korn’s journey.
The excerpts from Abram Korn’s memoirs provide a powerful firsthand account of his experiences during the Holocaust. The excerpts are arranged chronologically and cover various topics, from life in the ghetto to survival in the concentration camps.
The excerpts from Korn’s memoirs are powerful teaching tools about the Holocaust. They can help students understand the human cost of the war and the resilience of the human spirit.
The Abram Korn: A Holocaust Survivor website is a moving and vital resource. It tells the story of one man’s survival during the Holocaust and serves as a reminder of the importance of remembering this dark chapter in human history.
This blog post is a starting point for learning more about Abram Korn and the Holocaust.
Here are some additional resources:
By learning about the Holocaust, we can help to ensure that such a tragedy never happens again.
Background on Remember.org
The background section of the Abram Korn website provides essential context for understanding Korn’s story.
Other sections of Remember.org explore the rise of the Nazi Party, the invasion of Poland, and the establishment of the ghettos and concentration camps.
The background section is a valuable resource for students who are new to the study of the Holocaust. It helps students understand the historical context of Korn’s story.
Get “Abe’s Story” bookThe post Abram Korn A Holocaust Survivor – Abe’s Story is a Look into His Life appeared first on The Holocaust History - A People's and Survivor History - Remember.org.
Remember.org
I’m Declan Dunn, founder of Remember.org, exploring how Holocaust poetry humanizes history. With The Song Remains sharing this because I was inspired 42 years ago by a poem by Charlotte Delbo, a Holocaust survivor.
The Song Remains is an online anthology of over 160 Yiddish poems by 36 authors with English translations. The poems were written in Nazi-occupied Poland during the Second World War, compiled by Binem Heller, and published in Warsaw in 1951.The collection holds the treasure of creative poetry written by people who were imprisoned, starved, and ultimately murdered. The poems cover a wide range of themes, from the light-hearted love of nature, to the trials of coming of age in the Ghetto, and ultimately trying to come to terms with hatred, destruction, and death.The English translations are by Dr Sarah Traister Moskovitz, a 96-year-old native Yiddish speaker and professor emerita from California State University, Northridge.
We will be publishing one poem per week on the site, starting at the launch on 20 May.My Remember.org work began in a class where history at the surface was a summary told by the victors, a perception telling what happened always the what and the facts debated and refined, often by intellects judging the past.
But let me take you back to that moment, sitting in that classroom, when I first encountered Delbo’s Holocaust poem.
Auschwitz and After by Charlotte DelboIt was as if a veil had been lifted, revealing the raw human experience beneath the cold facts of history.
Her words didn’t just tell me what happened; it made me feel it and understand it in a way no textbook ever could.
Poetry is perspective, showing the human, the individual, beneath the experience of history, bringing it beyond facts to connect us to what actually happened during the Holocaust.
And as Leonard Cohen once sang,
there is a crack in everything.
That’s how the light gets in.
Poetry is the light that cracks history open. It shows the light, the experience, and the humanity of what people went through during the Holocaust.
Imagine standing in the shoes of a Holocaust survivor. The facts might tell you about dates, numbers, and locations.
But poetry? Poetry tells you about the weight of fear in their chest, the sound of footsteps that meant danger, and the small acts of kindness that kept hope alive.
It’s through these poetic glimpses that we truly begin to understand the humanity of the Holocaust.
Holocaust Poetry gives us what’s beneath the surface of history, a three-dimensional experience. Instead of trying to narrow it down.
The Song Remains gave us permission to share one poem, in English then in its original Yiddish, to get an idea of how Holocaust poetry humanizes history:
What Does This Old Gray Jew Want From Meby Kalman Lis
What does this old gray Jew want from me
Who comes to me to visit every night
And weighs me down with sadness and dark fears
With eyes black holes with tears
Can I return to him the shine of his eyes
The darkness – two black nights
And do I want to be the judge
That tells him, yes, you’re right.
A thousand times yes, Grandpa… and then believe me
The worst punishment yet will come to them
But I, who am no more than a poet
Can do no more than comfort with a verse
And give you comfort for your sorrow
With song that will serve as stem
For a blessed dove who carries in her beak
A green leaf of hope, over a dark sea
But the old man stays dumb and blind
In late fall a barren tree
And blood is running from his eyes
And stains deep red my blue dream
װאַס װיל פון מיר דער אַלטער גרױער ײד…
קלמן לים
װאָס װיל פון מיר דער גרױער, אלטער ײד,
װאָס קומט מיט יעדער נאַכט צו מיר צוגײן
און לײגט זיך אזױ שװער אױף מײן געמיט
מיט אױגן — שװארצע לעכער פול געװײן?
צי קען איך דען אים אומקערן די שײן
פון אױגן זײנע — פינצטערע צװײ נעכט,
און זאָל איך יאָ דער ריכטער װעלן זײן,
װאָס קאָן איך מער װי זאָגן, ביסט גערעכט.
טױזנט מאָל יאָ זײדע… גלױב מיר ס’װעט
און ס’מוז נאָך קומען װען פאר זײ די שטראָף;
נאָר איך, װאָס בין נישט מער, װי א פּאָעט,
װאָס קאָן איך נאָך, װי טרײסטן מיט מײן סטראָף.
און געבן דיר א תיקון צו דײן גרױל
מיט ליד, װאָס דאַרף איצט דינען פאר מײן שטאַם,
װי נחס טױב מיט גרינער בלאַט אין מױל,
— א האָפענונג אין ברױנעם, שװאַרצן ים.
נאָר ס’בלײבט דער אַלטער װײטער שטום און בלינד —
אין שפּעטן האַרבסט אן אָפּגעפליקטער בױם,
און ס’בלוט פון זײנע אױגן־לעכער רינט
און פלעקט אױף רױט מיר אױס מײן בלױען טרױם…
Like the Yiddish poem The Ring, written by Miriam Ulinover, who was one of the only Orthodox female poets of her time.
“Parted from this ring.
I will never choose.
My heart could not survive.
Tighter, smaller grows.
My life in the ring has now grown loose.”
In words like these, the poetry becomes a bridge to Holocaust history. Other examples include the works of Paul Celan [1], Nelly Sachs [2], and Primo Levi [3], each offering a unique perspective on the Holocaust.
Consider Ulinover’s words for a moment. In just a few lines, she captures not just the loss of a physical object but the shrinking of a whole world, a culture under threat during the Holocaust.
This ring isn’t just jewelry; it’s identity, tradition, and resistance. Through her Holocaust poem, we’re not just learning about history – we’re feeling it, living it.
Beneath the battles and what we’ve read in history classes. It’s the struggle, the experience, the Yiddish culture. Fragile.
In the case of these poems, a statement that I am alive, I was here.
Holocaust Poetry also fills in the gaps because a great poem, when you read it, you want to go deeper. There are gaps in there.
What’s missing? How can I learn more?
These gaps and questions are the heartbeats of proper historical understanding. They push us to dig deeper, to seek out more voices and more perspectives on the Holocaust.
It’s not about memorizing dates and names but about understanding the tapestry of human experience that makes up our past.
“I Cannot Forget”, two poems by Alexander Kimel
Like Alexander Kimel, who shared his poem “I cannot forget,” which echoes “Never Shall I Forget” by Elie Wiesel.
It is a poem that talks about his experience during the Holocaust at Rohatyn, and what that does is invite the students not to study who was there, what the battle was, and who the generals were.
Rohatyn Wartime Jewish Ghetto 1941-1943. Source: Rohatyn Jewish HeritageBut from a people’s perspective, a people’s history of the Holocaust is not a history written to persuade, a history written to be remembered and to be shared.
Read Kimel’s powerful words about the Holocaust:
“Do I want to remember?
The peaceful ghetto, before the raid:
Children shaking like leaves in the wind.
Mothers searching for a piece of bread.
Shadows, on swollen legs, moving with fear.
No, I don’t want to remember, but how can I forget?”
In these lines, Kimel doesn’t just tell us about the Holocaust ghetto – he shows us.
We see the children and feel their fear. We understand the desperation of mothers and the weakness of the starving. This isn’t just history; it is humanity laid bare during the Holocaust.
History gives us answers. Poetry keeps us asking questions, going deeper, and remembering the Holocaust.
Poetry doesn’t just complement our understanding of history – it completes it. It gives voice to the voiceless, brings light to the darkest corners of human experience, and ensures that we do more than just know our history – we feel it, live it, and carry it forward.
Yad Vashem Museum shares the importance of Holocaust poetry in education:
Understanding what and empathizing with whom? If one teaches a poem called “Testimony”,1 written by a Holocaust survivor, Dan Pagis, pupils will confront the subject of personal identity in a context where its erasure was sought as an ideological imperative. The poem juxtaposes the identities of three protagonists; the perpetrators, the poet as a representative of the victims, and the creator. In short shrift, eleven lines of his poem, Pagis succeeds in turning the identities upside-down. The student will likely “feel” the pain of the victim and better understand the relationship between the perpetrators and the victims.
What can a Sixth Grade Student’s Poem in 1993 tell us about the Holocaust?
Imagine Art Gallery: Room 1 – Children’s Art about the Holocaust
That urge to go deeper leads us to expressions like the poem Birdsong. This was written by a sixth grader in 1993 with no connection to the Holocaust, but with study, poetry and art. Inspired by teacher said, now you show me what you said, what your poetry is.
This is the power of poetry in understanding history. It doesn’t just inform future generations; it inspires them to connect, to empathize, to create.
This sixth grader, decades removed from the events, still found a way to channel that pain, that hope, into something beautiful and profound.
And in Birdsong, what she writes is
“He doesn’t know the world at all, nor what to sing about.
I do, but does it matter?
I feel trapped here. My love for all things vanish.
Trapped beyond reality in a nightmare.
I know I’d open my heart to beauty and
go into the woods
Someday. I hope that one day
I will realize how wonderful
it is to be alive.”
These words, from a child in 1993, echo the sentiments of those who lived through the darkest times of human history.
They speak to the universal human experience of suffering, hope, and resilience. This is how poetry bridges time, connecting us across generations to the essence of what it means to be human.
The Power of Holocaust Poetry in Remembrance
Holocaust poetry offers a unique and powerful lens through which to understand this dark chapter in human history. It bypasses the sterility of facts and figures, instead bringing us face-to-face with the emotions, experiences, and losses endured by those who lived through it.
Through these poems, we encounter the resilience of the human spirit in the face of unimaginable horror.
We witness courage, kindness, and defiance that defy the depths of human cruelty.
Holocaust poetry compels us to not only remember the atrocities but also to celebrate the strength and dignity of those who persevered.
It fosters empathy and understanding, ensuring that the lessons of the Holocaust are not forgotten.
Let us continue to honor the victims of the Holocaust by remembering their stories, their struggles, and their enduring humanity.
Let Holocaust poetry be a constant reminder of the importance of tolerance, compassion, and the fight against oppression in all its forms.
CITATIONS[1] Paul Celan Poetry
[2] Nelly Sachs poem – Flight and Metamorphosis
[3] “The Pain of Remembering”: Primo Levi’s Poetry and the Function of Memory
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Remember.org
My Name is Alice is a first-person Alice Muller memoir, an indomitable courageous spirit, told by her as she views things in the voice of her age at the time of the Holocaust in Czechoslovakia.
My Name is Alice Paperback – Chapters One and Two along with photos of Alice Mullerby Alice Muller (Author), Dr. Tzipporah Bat-Ami (Author)
Get “My Name is Alice” bookSee on AmazonAlice will move you, make you want to finish the book in one reading. You will learn about places and times no longer here, about heroism, about acts of kindness remembered for three quarters of a century and now passed on to you, with her diagrams of places and streets, and also a lesson plan for tolerance.
Timelines included for those who want to understand the context. The book is best read and shared with family members, including those who were alive at or near that time.We recommend parental guidance for younger children. You will treasure this keepsake, its cheerful inside and out despite the horrors that Alice endures.
The book is for all people of all faiths. Descriptions of Jewish customs are all explained, and any Yiddish or Hebrew words are translated.
This book is easy to read because of large print and cream pages, and it is easy to read because you will be captured by Alice’s voice. We hope you will find it moving and life altering. And a little child shall lead them!
Holocaust in Czechoslovakia Book By Survivor
Memories of My Childhood in the Holocaust by Judith Jagermann | Theresienstadt ghetto
Alice Muller – My Name is Alice Cover photo enhanced.Alice Muller Memoir –Forward to My Name is AliceIt is my privilege to comment on this history of a young child in the Holocaust. This work portrays, through early memories in the town of Michalovce, what life was like for Jews in pre-war Slovakia.
It provides factual information on the Slovakian Holocaust by first person testimony, which makes this book a critical historic document at a time when such testimony is harder to obtain.
This work is an inspirational narrative of one little girl who survived against all odds; though 83 percent of the Jewish citizens of Slovakia were murdered, 95 percent of children under fourteen were annihilated.
But Alice’s book also serves to illustrate the effects of the Holocaust on its child survivors.
It illustrates the effect of an early childhood perspective on life that remains to inform an entire lifetime. It documents the massive trauma at early developmental stages that can
only be mastered by being passed to each successive generation in retelling, naming, and in testimony and here, in this publication.
Loss of parental figures can never be fully resolved because throughout much of their lives, children survivors last saw their parents alive and well and did not know the actual mechanisms of mass killing of the Third Reich, so it is easy to understand why such survivors spent decades still hoping for their parents’ return.
Child survivors and their new families wait in limbo, and time becomes malleable, where once the return of these loved ones happens, childhood life can magically restart as if there was no catastrophic interruption.Once the knowledge of the likely mechanism of murder has been received, there is no gravesite to visit and no headstone to make, just missing ones, or unidentified parts in mass graves, or tons of ash.
The knowledge that human beings can be branded as animals, and that their parts can be used in manufacture, set a new low for humanity, and a sense of peril for their safety imbues such survivors’ beliefs.
What we now recognize as post-traumatic stress disorder is nearly universal among Holocaust survivors because of the degree of trauma and the bizarre nature of the trauma.
Though children may be resilient to a greater extent, early malnutrition and loss of parental figures increase the degree of these symptoms. So, such children in adult life carry fear of low flying planes, fear of registration in any form, fear of showers in case they are gas, and all these fears are adaptive in that they serve as protection.
However, we can understand that the vigilance that once was adaptive can interfere in peacetime with adaptation to ‘normal’ life.What you will also see here is the tremendous courage and strength such children have displayed in youth, becoming adults as children. And it also has given survivors an edge on calamities, knowing how to adapt, paying attention to, and warning others of, pending calamities, as has been seen with COVID when many just chose instead to use the defense of denial.
Because of the lack of early milestones of educational achievement, many survivors feel insecure about themselves, yet they mastered what most of us in America could not:
In schema compensatory action, they often became leaders of their fields, or they raised homes and gave children the names of the murdered to renew life.
And their progeny uniquely went into fields of service in overwhelming majority, to try to heal the horror. Many became physicians, many entered the mental health field, many worked with survivors and dedicated their lives to advocacy for survivors.
So it appears that despite lack of formalities of education, these survivors managed some level of success despite inner trauma.As survivors age, disabilities and limitations recreate the sense of helplessness of the Holocaust, and cause fear because the need to be on guard is so valued for survival.
Limited social access by disability or by pandemic further enhances the loneliness of having an experience that with Gods help, few will ever be able to comprehend.
To that end, Alice has written down this Holocaust memoir in the hope that her experiences will kindle a desire for more knowledge of what happened to so many millions, and for our youth to be able to connect to what she experienced with all the details that are provided by Alice in this remarkable work.
Her book is divided into sections, and early chapters can be read to a four-year-old. It is designed as something that can be read intergenerationally, and to advance in the book as development proceeds.Of course, the irony is that Alice at age six had no way to opt out of the current events, of seeing teachers who wore insignia of those people who wished to kill her. And of course, the later sections are suitable for adults, but you will be able to hear Alice’s voice as she goes through all of this as a child.
It has been an honor to help bring this testimony to the written page and we hope it will help increase understanding among peoples and make Never Again a reality.
Dr Tzipporah Bat-Ami – 2023
Copyrighted Material 2024
Alice Muller Memoir – Beginners (Chapter One)My name is Alice. Well, I guess you already know that from the title! But this is the story of how I got my name, and who I became once I had it.
I was born on a summer’s day a long time ago. The year was 1932. I was born in a country 4000 miles away, on a continent called Europe.
Its name was Czechoslovakia. It had a different language and customs from us. I was born in a town called Michalovce, which has a guttural sound in the first c, and the second c is pronounced like the sound tse in tse-tse fly.
It is in the eastern part of the country, and you can see my town circled in red in the map on the next page. I am also adding a postcard picture of the railroad station. It’s very pretty, but it will seem different later.
Michalovce circled in Red on the Map of Czechoslovakia 1933In those days, babies were often born at home, so I was born at 24 Slobodna Ulice. That means 24 Liberty Street. And of course, there was sunshine when I was born!
My father was named Herman Muller, and I called him Opu. My mother was named Esther Klein Muller, and I called her Onyu. I had an older brother Norbert, and I called him Norbert.
Pictures of me and my family. From left to right, are my mother, father, my brother Norbert, and me.
So just like there are rules here, there were rules in my country, but it was not the same.In my country, Jews were not permitted to carry names in the Bible, so when my father rushed to register my birth and said I was to be called Rachel, the town clerk said that was not allowed, and he decided that my name should be Rosalie because it started with the same letter, and filled out the documents with that name.
When my father came home to tell my mother that my name was now Rosalie, she said in no way was her baby going to be called Rosalie.
She said that Alica, pronounced with a soft c, was a popular stylish name, and that would be my name, though my Hebrew name remained Rachel, pronounced with a guttural c. and just so you know, my brother had a Hebrew name too, Nachum, and my father’s Hebrew name was Tzvi, or Herschel and my mother’s Hebrew name was Esther.
We were a wonderful family living in a Jewish home.
Michalovce train station SOURCE: https://www.dolnyzemplin.sk/CHAPTER TWOAlice Muller Memoir – My Name is AliceFirst, I would like to tell you how my home looked from the outside.
When my parents first got married in 1930, and moved to Michalovce, they moved into a large apartment in the fancier section of the ell of 24 Slobodna Ulice that faced the Slobodna street.
There was a fence separating the two sections, and at that time, my parents worked in a small tavern adjacent to their apartment.
After my brother was born in 1931, my mother was unable to continue working in the tavern due to child care, so they moved to a smaller apartment to save money.
This was where I was born, but because my mother was known far and wide as a beauty, and my father was so in love with her, he schlepped the vanity mirror he had bought her to the new apartment so she could adorn herself as befits a woman with such regal bearing!
Because of the ell structure, our new apartment faced the courtyard, which you will see later made all the difference in the world to us. My apartment was on the first floor above a short stoop and I could play in the grass when I came outside.
My neighbors adjacent to us were also a Jewish family, and they also had kids.
There was no apartment above us. The only time I ever saw the original apartment where my parents first resided, was when my mother needed a seamstress, and I went to bring clothes to tailor to the woman living there. More on her later.I drew you a diagram so you could see the layout, on the next page. I also have an aerial view of a similar space in more modern times, so you can appreciate the layout that way too.” (Drawing not available for this free excerpt.
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“A moving and powerful portrait of a Polish Jew who returned from the camps disconsolate and mute, Forget Adam Weinberger is an unforgettable novel” —La Libre Belgique
A story that explores the difficulty of speaking about the Holocaust.
First there is Adam Weinberger’s long childhood, in a world that has no idea yet what is in store for it. The childhood of a lover of illusions, who dreams of changing the world and of freeing his family from the burden of a tradition that he finds unbearable.
The adolescence of a young boy who is unable to express his love for Esther, his admiration for his uncle, his tenderness toward his mother. The helplessness of a young man who sees that dreams and fiction are unable to halt the destruction of this world and of its inhabitants.
Later there are fragments of narrations, the broken mirror that, through more or less well-meaning intermediaries, reflects the flight of this child who has become a man, who no longer believes in dreams, who no longer believes in words -who has taken refuge in gestures, those of his profession, medicine, and those of his great passion, the construction of ships in bottles.
And who flees words and other people to the point of losing his identity. Between the two is there, of which one dares not speak.
And then, in the end, after forgetting, at the end of all the flights, there is a return of childhood from beyond death, the single truth of fiction – of the narration of life.
PART I
BEFORE
ADAM
Midjourney AI Image inspired by Forget Adam WeinbergerOnce I was a child. At least I think so, which in itself is not such a bad thing, since the past, regardless of what people say, is unverifiable. I already had the same name, and the awkward features were taking shape that would later become my adult face, which today is in a state of decomposition.
I shared my name, like it or not, with the beings who formed the fairly large entity of a family, my family, whom I appreciated in different ways.
Closest to me was my sister Rachel, seven years older than I. As soon as I was old enough to grasp what was happening and what people around me were saying, I understood that she was perpetually preoccupied by the search for a husband: before meeting one because she feared never finding one, and, once she did, because he spent all his time in the town cafés, sometimes for days on end. Rachel … you weren’t a great beauty, but you were my sister, and I would have preferred another brother-in-law instead of that idle Moishe—belated regrets, you’ll excuse me. In any case, I did what I could …
Along with Rachel and me, the Weinberger family had two other heirs, both male. I never had much to say to Samuel, five years my senior. He was devoted body and soul—especially body—to sports.
When he wasn’t kayaking on the river, he was running, wrestling—anything to work up a sweat and impose his tyranny over me.The only words I spoke to him, to the despair of my parents, were those of pleading, when he caught me in his iron grip, and curses when I felt I was at a safe distance—often followed by pleading when I had underestimated the distance.
Avner was different. Although ten years older than I, he was kind to me, at least when he noticed my presence. He was “our” rabbi, who, to maintain this distinction, spent all his days immersed in books or prayers.
Samuel, though younger, had quickly exceeded him in size—horizontally and vertically—but he never dared lay a hand on him. To each his privileges: Samuel didn’t hit Avner, but Avner spoke to him even less than he did to me.
So, to surround me with the affection I needed, I had a brother with a mind lost in visions, who tried to instill wisdom in me; another who persecuted me for my own physical well-being; and a sister who either comforted or cared for me, all the time whining about her hypothetical or phantom husband, depending on the time period.
Ruling over us all were my parents, the inseparable couple, Sarah and Avram Weinberger—inseparable because there is nothing like time to twist and tighten the ties that bind.
As our family name indicates, my father’s father was a Hungarian wine merchant like his ancestors before him. But my own father had broken with tradition, since only one brother was needed to carry on the family business and since no one else was there to take up his father-in-law’s lumber company.
Avram Weinberger was a reasonably successful businessman but a worried father. He knew that his elder son wouldn’t take up the trade, but he couldn’t complain because Avner had devoted himself instead to the Eternal One, blessed be His name, and no one was ever against having a rabbi in the family.
However, he had doubts about Samuel’s future. Since he was stronger and more outspoken than most boys his age—I can bear witness to this from having been on the receiving end of his outspokenness more often than I deserved—what adventure wouldn’t tempt him?My father feared most of all that Samuel might frequent the young Zionists, since he was so well endowed with the physical and mental qualities they required.
As for me … but let’s not go into my father’s suffering just yet.
At this point in the story, the rules of the genre require me to speak of the other half of the parental couple. My mother.
She was … what should I say, other than that she was my mother and everything that follows naturally from that? Beautiful, of course.
She took care of the house and her children. She busied herself all week but even more on Friday, in preparation for Shabbat, our day of rest.
I often watched her work so hard that I began to doubt the true holiness of this day. There’s something rotten in this earthly realm that violates the spirit of the Commandments and prevents people from observing them perfectly unless money is involved— which is not really orthodox.
Even if my father’s income was enough to support a woman and four children—one of them a sports lover—it didn’t allow him to hire someone to help my mother. My parents should have had one less child, but since I was the youngest, I preferred not to think about this solution.
Rachel helped my mother, but she sighed constantly and wasn’t all that useful. As for me, I tried sometimes, but, over and above the Commandments, there is Tradition, and I was a man.For that matter, during childhood, which often lasts a long time, one doesn’t have that much concern for other people, and it’s only later that one feels remorse.
My father and mother, then, constituted what is called a couple. The reality of the situation depends on the meaning one gives this word.
They lived and slept together, had married because they were supposed to, and for the same reason had procreated—there was no required number of offspring as long as it was large.
Maybe you’ve seen Fiddler on the Roof? I know fools with university degrees today who assert that that kind of situation couldn’t have existed because they were born in the age of Coca Cola and the Apollo spacecraft.
I had fewer sisters than Tevye had daughters, my father wasn’t a Rothschild and sang off key, but my parents spoke to each other even less than Tevye and Golde.
Certain questions never even entered their minds—too bad for us and for the rest of the world, because it wouldn’t have hurt anyone if they did. There are silences that kill. I say so even if it’s a cliché, because when you know the victim, nothing is a cliché.
When I consider the sum total of the fatigue, the problems, the pain that four children represented for my mother, right from the moment of their conception, I can’t understand how anyone can seriously claim that children are a blessing.Maybe we brought her a few joys—in our sleep or when we weren’t around—and she had managed to avoid having to live alone, alone with a husband who had nothing to say to her and didn’t even hide that fact with small talk, which sometimes allows others to believe that happiness can exist (although that would require some imagination …).
Midjourney AI Image inspired by the book Forget Adam WeinbergerAs for yours truly, he was born smack in the middle of a war, in the month of June. The fact that he was the youngest didn’t prevent his parents from naming him Adam.
It was as if, lacking any inspiration, they had returned to Biblical sources in search of a name and had stopped fairly quickly, although without having to resort to calling him Tovu v’Bohu or Bereshit, which would be difficult names to have to carry around.
I like my name. It smells of the earth, even if Poland is no paradise.
Oh yes, I forgot to tell you: as if life wasn’t difficult enough, we lived in a small, drab Polish village inhabited one-third by Jews and two-thirds by tranquil, dull anti-Semites, able to suppress their sentiments toward their neighbors of my religion out of Christian charity and good business sense.
I’m exaggerating—they weren’t all anti-Semitic. We even had Christian friends. I’m saying that so you’re aware in advance …I don’t think I was a difficult child—I caught up later, though—and I was a good student. My relative calm was closely related to a feeling of profound, general indifference for the universe around me, which should have interested me more.
I didn’t confide in my family or seek their confidences. When my sister started to moan, I fled—unless she was busy caring for me.
I had no friends and a total lack of interest in my religion, which would have worried my mother if she had had the time to think about it and only slightly vexed my father.
If God exists, I said to him with the mature wisdom of a ten-year-old, He doesn’t need me to go to the synagogue to pray to Him.
Moreover, I added, I found most of the Ten Commandments inappropriate and, what’s more, fairly useless. The others, like “Thou shalt not kill” or “Thou shalt not steal,” were so self-evident that it seemed pointless to connect them to any single religion.
I have always been naïve, and I believed for a long time that any person with a minimum of common sense would follow the axiom that one should do unto others as one would want others to do unto him.
I should point out again that I lived in an environment that was rather unusual in Polish Jewish society between the two World Wars.
My father was neither rich nor poor, at least before 1935, and paid little attention to religion. I don’t think he was leaning toward assimilation, though. He was not unhappy that one of his sons wanted to become a rabbi, and he no doubt took this fact as an embrace of Judaism sufficient to reassure his family.
No more was necessary. As for Avner, there were no choices and no worries: first heder, then yeshiva. But my father was not eager for his other two sons to follow this path.He found the classrooms squalid and the teachers too violent. He had no doubt kept in his heart the memory of some unjust punishment he had received, and he wasn’t the type to find relief from his own unhappiness in imposing it on others.
But where should he send Samuel and me? The schools financed and run by the Bund seemed too leftist to him. Communism represented a greater threat to him than Zionism.
The Tarbut schools were a direct extension of the latter. The Agudath Israel schools were too orthodox, and private schools cost an arm and a leg.
That’s why he sent us both to a free Polish public school, where classes were held only in the morning. In the afternoon, Avner was supposed to inculcate in us the values necessary to make us good Jews, which he did in as perfunctory manner as possible, since he was too absorbed in working for his own future.
This choice brought criticism upon my father. Not only was he offering his children up for conversion, but, even worse, he hadn’t even enrolled them in a Jewish school for the afternoon.
He held fast to his position for a long time, because he didn’t have a lot of time to spend with us, because it was the most economical solution, and because, as I mentioned, he was quite liberal. I admit that I never had any reason to complain about his decision.
Nor about refusing to have any friends, since I lived in a milieu where no one would be tempted to have a relationship with a Jew anyway.
Furthermore, these free afternoons were a blessing. Lost in reverie or just lazy, I read a lot. Weather permitting, I took off deep into the woods with a book and didn’t return until nightfall.
Samuel also took advantage of this freedom, but in a different way. He spent all his time involved in sports. Later he used it to perfect his knowledge of Zionism. Nevertheless, as you will see, I wasn’t able to enjoy this freedom for long.So, I was a lonely, dreamy child who spent his spare time wandering through the beech trees along the river—scenery so typical of Poland.
When I heard the particular cries upstream that announced that my brother Samuel was about to burst into view with his friends, paddling like a bunch of maniacs in small boats that the rushing water seemed to want to get rid of by forcing them toward the river bank, I hid behind a barrel and let them pass.
If I had few things in common with my brother, I had even fewer with his friends. I shared my father’s dislike of the Zionists—which most of them were—but for different reasons.
I didn’t take satisfaction in the image of the Jew as martyr, fearful and weak, always afraid of some pogrom. I was a child, and above all I was myself.
I frequented a few non-Jews, the occasional classmate, and I wasn’t religious. Therefore I saw no reason to flaunt my Judaism, which would only end up causing me problems.
I wanted to continue living peacefully where I was, because moving somewhere else seemed to me to be the worst possible curse. From my point of view, the Zionist adventure and the call for a Jewish state in Palestine—with the requirement to go live there and fight—seemed like implausible and absurd aspirations.
Maybe a Jewish state in Poland … but what would we do with the Poles? I was afraid of the Zionists, because I imagined our government demanding that all Jews living comfortably in the Diaspora should emigrate to the desert, with every other nation following their example to get rid of us once and for all.
Therefore, since I couldn’t climb in the hierarchy of the movement, I must confess that as soon as I was old enough, I used my own pitiful means to attempt to sabotage my brother’s Palestine plans.Without meaning to, I ended up in this way being a considerable support to my father, which had the unpleasant effect of depriving me of the joys of success and of everyone-for-himself.
Not to mention that this didn’t help make me more likable in my brother’s eyes, even if he wasn’t always aware of my activities and of my responsibility for his setbacks. I have to say that, even if I had good reasons to resent Samuel, he had no lack of detractors for his involvement in the Zionist movement.
My father was against it in principle and because he thought you had to be crazy to go live in a country filled with Brits and Arabs—worse than the Christian Poles, whom at least we were familiar with—and start over from square one.
The fact that Jews had been forbidden for centuries from owning land didn’t help to develop much of a taste for the joys of agriculture in him:
“So, Shmuel” (he thought this Hebrew name was endearing), can you imagine yourself behind a plow?!”And he tapped his forehead while making an “oy” of consternation.
My mother, too, was against the idea in principle but also because of tradition: her husband was opposed to it, and it was the custom for a Jewish mother to do everything possible to keep her sons close to her.
As for Rachel, she didn’t care, at first because Zionism wouldn’t provide her with a husband and, once she was married, because her husband had lots of faults, but not that one.
Avner, who never thought about anything but the Torah and the Talmud, was violently opposed for religious reasons that I found completely incomprehensible, and that today seem tragic and preposterous: it wasn’t right to found a Jewish state until the coming of the Messiah.
The Messiah didn’t come, but Hitler did in His place, and you have to admit that, in spite of my antipathy toward Zionism, if it had gained steam earlier, the Nazis would have had to go farther to find us, and we would have given them a proper welcome.
But let’s not be unrealistic: even “if”, I can assure you that 80 percent of the Jews would have stayed in Europe for fear of investing their future and their past in such a ridiculous plan. And it’s not by means of “ifs” that we could have beaten the Germans.
I also had measles when I was three, and other normal childhood diseases—normal but painful when you’re the victim—and the Messiah never came out of his hiding place to save me. So?
The Messiah—now there’s a story … On our street lived a boy named Moishe, whose father was very rich—as a joke we called him Pharaoh, because of his son—and who had the incredible good fortune to take a trip to Rome to visit distant cousins.Everyone in the community was talking about it: imagine, a Jew from our town in the city of the Pope! And there was a legend that claimed that the Messiah was waiting at the gates of Rome.
Before Moishe left—at that time the question interested me because of all the others, especially my rabbi brother’s—I had asked him to do a discreet investigation.
At his return, I was triumphant: I had been right. The Messiah wasn’t there. I told Avner that he could eliminate one place from his research—I didn’t say it maliciously but rather to help him and save him time.
But he just ran his hand through my hair with a very sad or very religious look, according to your point of view, telling me that Moishe didn’t have good eyes.
I didn’t understand what he meant by that, but I believed the Messianic legends even less.
Anyway, I’m digressing. I introduced you to my family. I’ve set the scene, as they say, because one must respect the reader and never suppose that he’s clever enough to understand everything on his own.
However, I’m far from having mentioned the important things.
RACHELMidjourney AI Image inspired by Rachel in Forget Adam WeinbergerTo be sure, there is still a lot to say about the members of my family and about my childhood, a period that it’s a pleasure to speak of since one knows for sure that he can’t relive it.
I grew, since I couldn’t do otherwise, and everyone around me got older. Avner was more and more the rabbi—he finally became one altogether—and Samuel confirmed our father’s fears by becoming more and more of a Zionist.
Rachel, searching endlessly for a husband, despaired more and more of ever finding one.
As for my parents, they didn’t work more—that wouldn’t have been possible—but they seemed more and more tired. My father even began to consider Shabbat a blessing, and my mother exhausted herself more and more to observe the day when even Adonai, blessed be He, rests.
If He knew how much my mother did to prepare for this day of rest, I’m sure He would have provided us with two of them. But he didn’t know or didn’t want another day, and now He wouldn’t accept that His Jews be just the slightest bit Christian one day a week.
Too bad, because Sunday is a great idea, right after Shabbat. Luckily for those born after my mother, the British invented the weekend, without asking Him His opinion—but my mother didn’t know anything about the British.
And besides, she would have probably exhausted herself twice as much.
So time passed, and not only in the glorious Polish Third Republic. But when it doesn’t bring any big changes, besides a few gray hairs at your parents’ temples, you can treat it lightly, even with almost total indifference.I grew stronger and could escape more easily when Samuel chased me. Avner’s lectures began to get on my nerves, but I still listened to him to make him happy, and I even let Samuel beat me up once in a while so that he didn’t lose confidence in himself.
I was still comforted by my sister, but her tears grew more abundant. I think she must have fallen in love with a young Jew who was passing through. Of course, they never were able to speak to each other, and he left ignorant of the passion that he had ignited—or rather incarnated—for a few weeks.
My parents were also worried that Rachel wouldn’t find a husband. I was approaching my bar mitzvah, and she was almost twenty: two pressing concerns for Jewish parents.
I would have liked to help them by telling them that as far as I was concerned, I could have easily done without this ceremony, but I don’t think that would have given them any solace.
And what right did I have anyway to deprive my family of a celebration? So they sent me to the rabbi, and Avner spent more time teaching me.
As for my sister, my father finally resolved to ask for help from a matchmaker, to the great displeasure of my mother, who knew better than anyone else the results one could expect from such a move.Although the matchmaker had been creeping around our house for several years and was furious at us for not taking advantage of her services, she got strangely friendly, took her time, and ended up presenting us with what was left at the bottom of the barrel.
When she arrived, I would hide behind the door to spy on her, as she triumphantly proposed an aged alcoholic or some neurotic widower. Rachel found good reasons to despair, as did my parents.
Fearing that the quality of her care for me would decline, or even that I’d end up in turn having to take care of her, I decided to hunt for a brother-in-law myself.
Where could I hope to dig up this rare phenomenon when I was barely twelve years old and the entire male Jewish population had already been approached, or almost?
And there was my mother’s example, which gave me pause. I refused to allow Rachel to ruin her health preparing for Shabbat and appreciated less and less the lethargy that fell over our community every weekend while I wanted to get out and have a good time.
Even Samuel, whose main characteristic was the inability to sit still—even less to reflect on anything—sacrificed himself to the laws of Shabbat. What could I do to help Rachel escape this curse?I saw only one solution and resolved to befriend the first classmate who had a brother old enough to marry. A goyish classmate, of course. It was the only way to escape the drudgery of preparing for Shabbat and be able to enjoy Sundays.
You need to understand what a sacrifice this represented for me at that time. Not because of frequenting non-Jews (I already explained about that) nor of turning over my sister body and soul to one of them, but to have to—even for a limited amount of time—conduct a friendship, with everything that involved!
A lot was at stake.
For a few days, I asked around discreetly. I was quickly able to choose three families that fulfilled the conditions of having two sons and being Christian. I had a wealth of choices, so to speak, and was already overjoyed: my sister had waited almost twenty years, and me? Two weeks …
The first family, the Majarskis, had a lot going for them. The father was rich—he owned a store and a house and had a servant so strong that he could have prepared Shabbat every day.
Their older son was twenty-five and didn’t seem to be thinking of marriage. The problem was that, like all good Poles, they were very Catholic. Every Sunday, the family marched off to church dressed to the nines—the mother several times a week.What good would it do to change from one form of religious drudgery to another? Especially since, when I tried to enter into a conversation with the younger son, who was in my class, he turned his back to me with disdain, whispering that he didn’t associate with us.
I understood clearly whom he meant. I wasn’t going to put myself out to cultivate a brother-in-law who wouldn’t talk to his wife or his mother-in-law. As my parents’ case proved, it wasn’t necessary to look to a goyish family to match up a couple who didn’t speak to each other!
The second family gave me more hope. The von Statts were Germans who had been in Poland for three generations. If they were crazy enough to come live here, they could certainly consider marrying down.
Furthermore, they were Protestant, not Catholic. That seemed to be an acceptable religious compromise. There would just have to be an arrangement to maintain the best parts of both traditions.
I was easily able to befriend Hans, a short, husky blond boy who spoke little. We were made to get along, since neither one of us liked to talk.
But, in order not to waste time or limit my options, I also decided to form a relationship with the third family I had selected, the Dobjinskis, completely atheist Poles—which isn’t common—and whose father was a tremendous drinker—which definitely is. Janek, their younger son, had the unfortunate flaw of being a chatterbox—so much so that at school no one went near him.
So it wasn’t hard for me to become his friend. The difficult part was to stay that way for the necessary amount of time.I spent all my free time with either Hans or Janek. I was received equally well in both their homes, but I have to admit a clear preference for Hans because he was quiet and his family’s cook baked wonderful cakes.
Let’s not forget, though, that my real targets were not my friends: it was their brothers.
I liked Hans’s brother, Johann. He was the same age as Avner, but he wasn’t planning on becoming a pastor—which, for that matter, wouldn’t have thwarted my plans.
Janek’s brother, Pavel, was more like my brother Samuel: he was in constant motion and hardly spoke a word to me. All I needed now was an opportunity for my sister to meet them.
Strangely enough, it was simpler with Pavel. I noticed that he often came to get his brother when school was over. I had only to go home with a new whim: demand that my sister also come to school to wait for me.
Since she was often bored and annoyed my mother with her continual lamentations, my parents willingly gave in to my request.From that day on, the last few minutes of class were very trying for me. I imagined Rachel and Pavel both waiting outside the gate. When the bell finally rang and we could leave, the first thing I did was look to see if I could distinguish them among those who had come to collect their little darlings.
After a while, I realized that this wasn’t going to be enough: they had the habit of waiting at opposite ends of the long iron fence, so they couldn’t see each other.
I had to act again. One afternoon I announced to Janek that I wanted to introduce him to my beautiful sister. I took her by the hand so she could shake hands with my friend.
And with his brother. I said to her,
“Rachel, this is Janek, my friend, and his brother, Pavel.”
Then I explained that, since they both came to wait for us, Janek and me, they might as well meet each other. But I didn’t elicit wild enthusiasm, and Rachel dragged me away, barely saying hello.
She wasn’t really putting her all into this. How would she ever find a husband? On the way home I spoke about Janek but mostly about Pavel.
Since I knew so little about the latter, I had no trouble inventing all kinds of positive qualities for him. But Rachel was hardly listening to me, or at least she didn’t show she was.
I was so mad at her that I thought I’d drop the whole idea and return to my beloved solitude, which I had sacrificed for so long. What was my poor sister hoping for?Of course, she was far from being ugly, but she was even farther from being rich. And there’s something I haven’t mentioned so as not to make her situation sound even worse: she spent all her time, when she wasn’t crying, reading French novels, which, unfortunately for her, were translated into Polish or Yiddish, if that language means anything to you.
Obviously, Maupassant, Flaubert, and Balzac tried desperately to give her ideas and raise her hopes. It’s easy for a writer to promise happiness to his readers when he knows he doesn’t have to wipe away their tears.
Rachel was often seated on a bench alone, a book in her lap, eyes staring into space, dreaming about the happiness before her in paper and ink and waiting for those sweet romantic lies to become reality.
When my mother called her, she would stand up sighing, wondering where the handsome, rich young man who would love her passionately would appear from.
Before going inside, she would gaze one last time at the road and the horizon.
Often, rather than the longed-for lover, she would see the matchmaker spring up suddenly with her evil smile and loathsome suggestions.
Sometimes I thought that it was weakness on my father’s part to be so liberal that he wouldn’t marry his daughter against her will. At this rate, if she didn’t abandon her reading and her Madame Bovary dreams, she would end up an old maid.
Getting a grip on herself to accept a husband wouldn’t make her unhappier than that. Sometimes you have to do things to make others happy in spite of themselves. In any case, that was my plan, even if it was beginning to become a burden.
Fortunately, when I was leaving school the next day, I found Rachel and Pavel talking to each other. I jumped for joy, seeing myself already relieved of my responsibility.On the way home, I spoke some more about Pavel. I was so happy, that I had no problem finding all kinds of new things in his favor, and it appeared to me that my sister was finally listening to me.
However, for the sake of caution (and because I liked their cook’s cakes), I kept up my friendship with Hans and Johann. And it was thanks to their mother that I had the opportunity to introduce Rachel to them.
This fine woman, who had taken a shine to me, had the idea of inviting me to spend a day in the country with her husband and children. I pretended to hesitate, arguing that my parents would never allow me to leave home for a whole day with people they didn’t know.
But there was perhaps a way: if my sister could join us …
As for Rachel, I didn’t have much trouble convincing her. A ride in a carriage, a picnic on the grass—she had read about that so often! And since nothing in particular seemed to be going on between her and Pavel, we might as well play several cards at once …
It was a beautiful, sunny Sunday. Mr. von Statt had rented an old carriage drawn by two horses. My sister was overjoyed.
She had put on a simple, pretty dress that made a good impression. Mrs. von Statt knew how to win her over and asked her to sit beside her for the ride.The women were seated opposite the three of us, while Mr. von Statt, transformed into a poet or a workman by the leisure of a Sunday excursion, held the reins.
I was delighted: it wasn’t only for Rachel that this outing was a first. I immediately decided that I preferred Johann to Pavel as a brother-in-law, and I felt satisfaction in thinking that my sister, even though she saw the latter every day, didn’t seem to have developed an undying passion for him.
The weather was glorious. Hans was as calm as usual, and Mrs. von Statt chatted happily with my sister, whom—miracle of miracles—Johann couldn’t stop looking at.
Rachel, completely absorbed in the conversation with her future mother-in-law, didn’t notice anything. Of course, the day had barely begun …
Seeing how everything turned out, even today I don’t know whether I should congratulate myself for having offered my sister the opportunity of living for a whole day, plus a few more afterward, as if she were in a French novel.
Of course, such an experience must make the rest of one’s life seem sad and insipid, even after a very brief moment of happiness.
I don’t think my mother ever experienced even a tiny fraction of this joy—although she was the one who put the finishing touches on my efforts.
We stopped at the edge of a river in a patch of thick grass warmed by the sun. Everything was perfect. I was sure I wasn’t going to risk the sudden appearance of my brother Samuel and his friends in their boats: this river was too calm and too narrow.It was made for peace and quiet, not for Samuel. We unfolded the tablecloth for our picnic. Rachel was trembling slightly and gave me a look every once in a while as if asking me to reassure her that she wasn’t dreaming.
Johann couldn’t keep his eyes off her, his parents were smiling, and his brother was laughing. I was in heaven.
I almost felt like taking an oath of unending friendship with Hans, sealed with a drop of blood.
It’s amazing how strong an illusion can be.
The lunch almost caused a few problems when Mrs. von Statt took out the sausages that were supposed to accompany the salads and the bread. Rachel grew pale.
She had never thought about this. Me neither, because it had been a long time since my mind was on such things. Pork!
I’ve already said that we weren’t a particularly religious Jewish family—with the exception of Avner. But ancestral customs survive the loss of the faith of which they were the foundation.And they probably compensate for actual belief in order to ensure that one remains part of the fold. So, except for Avner, whose whole existence it constituted, the deepest religiosity didn’t inspire the day-to-day life of the Weinberger family, even though my father still went to the synagogue with my mother—but seated apart, as you might know—and we all went for big occasions.
Given the times and the region where we lived, we were taking considerable liberties with the Eternal One and His laws! Except for me, no one even thought about easing the rigors of Shabbat or the laws of kashrut for his own purposes.
It was the way we lived: we bought from Jewish merchants, and we would never have looked for any other kind of food. For that matter, we weren’t any worse off eating this way.
With the von Statts, however, in order to manifest my opposition to tradition—though I admit that I didn’t risk those concerned even noticing this expression of my independence—and also to avoid compromising my plans, I accepted all kinds of food, explaining that in our home we didn’t pay much attention to these archaic rules.
We were good Jews who didn’t want to attract attention. So, when Mrs. von Statt invited my sister, she didn’t think it was necessary to prepare anything in particular.
Rachel gave me a troubled look. She wasn’t going to ruin everything for a slice of ham, was she?
If she were going to meet Stendhal, she had to give it her best, and her future happiness was well worth a bite of sausage!I already said that she wasn’t ugly—I’m taking the risk of creating doubt by repeating it—but what replaced physical beauty in her wasn’t enough to excuse everything. Johann seemed to find her to his liking—let her do as much for the pork!
Rachel had lowered her head and was busy torturing a few poor blades of grass that had nothing to do with this kashrut business.
Fortunately, even though I’ve been speaking about it for a while, no one had yet noticed her malaise. It was up to me …
Pointing to the ham and giving my sister a sharp jab with my elbow, I exclaimed,
“Look, Rachel! Your favorite ham!”
Then, to our hosts, who were already smiling as my sister turned the color of the forbidden meat, I said,
“If you don’t hurry up, she’s going to eat the whole thing. Just think: we have centuries of abstinence to make up for!”I have no idea what Rachel was thinking at that moment, but I had succeeded in preserving our chances. The von Statts were laughing heartily, and my sister, red as a beet, grabbed the first slice of ham she had ever touched in her life.
She muttered, “My brother always exaggerates …”
“What she hasn’t told you,” I added to outdo myself, “is that our uncle brought us a ham like this one last week, and Rachel ate so much she got indigestion! But I think it will be OK for us to have just a little.”
I couldn’t very well abandon my sister altogether … Mrs. von Statt, who perhaps suspected something, affirmed that, in any case, there were enough bread and salads so that Rachel wouldn’t die of hunger.
My sister, who had never seen so many people smile at her in such a short amount of time, performed the first act of her life in contradiction not of a law that she was hardly acquainted with and didn’t understand, but of her customary way of doing things, or that of her entourage, which meant about the same thing.
It still warms my heart to think that this trap I set for her allowed her to perform the first freely chosen act of her existence.
Rachel bit into the forbidden meat, not without suppressing a slight look of disgust. None of the von Statts began a discussion on the miracle of a Jew eating pork.
Dreading that my sister might spit everything out, I swallowed my portion. I didn’t calm down until I noticed that she actually seemed to be enjoying the forbidden fruit.
She was also looking more often at Johann. She had probably finally noticed how much the young man was paying attention to her, which must have helped her to forget the exact nature of what was in her mouth.She even reached out to take some more, but she thought better of the idea and concentrated on the salads and the bread.
They asked her about her activities, her tastes, her plans—things that she had never thought about. She responded in monosyllables, blushing, which the von Statts seemed to appreciate.
Most of the time, I tried to elaborate on her reticence by supplying more information, longer if not exactly true.
I became bolder when I noticed that Rachel didn’t contradict me. Was she beginning to realize exactly how lucky she was? She embellished each and every one of my lies.
The plates were emptied, and the conversation ebbed. Mr. and Mrs. von Statt were slow digesters and thus silent by necessity.
Johann seemed intimidated by Rachel. My friendship hadn’t made Hans any more talkative, and my sister remained mute, staring at the grass.
She raised her eyes once in a while toward Johann and then lowered them as soon as their gazes met each other’s. Encouraged by his parents’ winks, Johann tried to talk enthusiastically about his studies and his future career as a lawyer.
He planned to move to Warsaw, which must have made my sister’s heart beat faster, since, after all her reading, any capital city for her was Paris.But even Johann stopped talking. There were a few moments of silence during which I was wracking my brains trying to find a way to bring “my” couple together.
Finally, Mr. von Statt stood up heavily, stretched as much as his sluggish digestion allowed, and announced that he was going to take a nap in the shade. His wife followed him, while I suggested to my friends and my sister that we take a walk along the river.
We started out. I went ahead with Hans, determined to leave behind the ones I already called “the two lovebirds.”
But every time the distance became too great, my sister would call me back. So, she didn’t understand anything! Me, she could see all the time.
A young, handsome, intelligent man was waiting impatiently to speak to her of love; the weather was splendid, and the landscape would have made the surliest civil servant dream of poetry; and she didn’t want me to leave the two of them alone …
Once again, I had to invent something! I was the only one who didn’t have the right to the calm necessary for digestion. I took a look at the river and suggested to Hans that we go for a swim.
I was sure that my sister would refuse to appear in only her slip before people she barely knew, and Johann would therefore be happy to keep her company.
Hans accepted enthusiastically: he found the walk and the heat unpleasant. But my plan wasn’t to my sister’s liking: “No, Adam, it’s too dangerous to swim just after a meal.”“Oy, oy, oy,” my father would have said, and with him all the Jewish characters that appear in literature.
What was the matter with her? Was she incapable of understanding that the purpose of this day wasn’t to make her appreciate ham so she could become a nun?
Fortunately, Johann showed some initiative:
“Let’s let them enjoy themselves. The water’s not deep, and we’ll stay on the bank to keep an eye on them. Unless you want to swim, too …”
She refused, blushing, and Hans and I didn’t wait for her permission to undress and dive into the cold water.
I hate water. Cold water even more. For half an hour I endured this sacrifice to ensure Rachel’s happiness.
Hans enjoyed the experience much more than I did, probably because of his generations of distant ancestors who had sailed the Baltic, whom he had spoken to me about one day.
They were the source of his family’s relative prosperity. I did my best to look as though I was having a good time and tried hard to resist my growing disgust for the water and for all the questionable things it might be carrying along.
I held back my cries when a lascivious water plant brushed against me, making me imagine billions of microbes and viruses attacking my skin and endangering my health.
I found a little more courage when I finally saw Rachel and Johann alone on the bank, talking quietly. There were long moments of silence, to be sure, but they no doubt had their secret necessity.
Finally, my resistance gave out, and I pulled Hans away in a race to the sunny meadow, where, as quickly as possible, we could get rid of the freezing drops that were clinging to us. I heard my sister shouting that she wanted to follow us. But Johann must have found a new argument, no less convincing. I liked this guy …
I lay on the grass next to Hans, out of breath but delighted, confident in the future, which would provide me with a brother-in-law and free my sister from anguish and a joyless life.For the first time I imagined what my parents would think if their daughter married Johann or Pavel, a goy … but they had to understand! It was that or nothing.
In our community, there had already been a case of a girl who had married a Christian. Her father chased her from his house, disinherited her, and considered her dead.
Even though she hadn’t left the town, she was never able to see her parents again. The mother despaired but didn’t dare go secretly to visit her daughter, who, people said, cried every day thinking of her parents.
Nevertheless, her husband’s family was charming, not too Catholic, and almost tolerant. The father-in-law even reached out a few times, but in vain. Everyone attributed the death of the young girl’s first baby to her sorrow.
She herself remained between life and death for a long time, but her father never came to see her. Her mother fell ill, etc. The whole nine yards, which didn’t do much to strengthen the Catholics’ love for us.
Our whole community talked about it. They tried to reason with the father, to no avail. My own father often went to speak to him. He condemned his reaction, which gave me hope. But I wasn’t completely reassured.
And in this case it wasn’t just some Jewish girl marrying some young German Protestant or Polish atheist, but his own daughter marrying a goy….The sun was going down. Rachel and Johann brought us our clothes. We walked back to the meadow, where the parents were still asleep.
We were silent: Hans and I from the sun and fatigue, Rachel and Johann for reasons that transcended words.
Rachel didn’t say another word on the way home. Thank God Hans and I were there. We had had such a good time, we affirmed, that we ought to do the same thing the following week.
Mr. and Mrs. von Statt accepted with pleasure, and Rachel—my going depended on her—complied without batting an eyelid.
After having thanked and taken leave of our friends, Rachel and I made our way back to our neighborhood. I didn’t dare say a word, and she seemed to share my sudden awkward discomfort.
She had become very pale again—she certainly had turned every possible color today! Suddenly, she took a step toward the ditch at the side of the road, leaned her hand against a birch tree, and threw up what her religion couldn’t swallow.
I thought she was going to make a terrible scene, that she resented me intensely for having led her into this trap, and I prepared myself selflessly for the cries and tears that I was so accustomed to.
But she walked back toward me, whiter than ever in spite of having been out in the sun all day.
Her eyes were drowned in tears, but she wasn’t actually crying. In a soft, trembling voice, she asked me, “You won’t say anything to Mama and Papa, right?”
I took her hand with all the tenderness I could muster at that moment, and we walked home, bound together by a great, heavy secret.
The next day, after school, I saw from afar that she was standing next to Pavel. He was speaking freely, but she was barely listening and wasn’t looking at him or answering him.I thought I would tell her that she needn’t come to wait for me anymore, but I decided in the end that it was premature to sacrifice one of “our” opportunities.
On the way home, I took a risk and made a few references to the previous day’s outing, but most of all to the next one, and I could see that my sister was impatient for the weekend to arrive.
We couldn’t let things drag on. Hannah, the matchmaker, would end up completing her job one day, when she felt her pride was avenged.
The following Sunday was as idyllic as the previous one, especially for Rachel and Johann—even though I had to dive into the cold, repugnant water again.
We continued these expeditions, which became a habit throughout the springtime, and the weekly swim was transformed into a ritual imposed on only those who enjoyed it, namely everyone else but me.
I was annoyed at myself for not having been able to find something else to do the first time, especially since, on our way home from our second Sunday in the country, Rachel remembered that I hated the water.
I can’t help thinking that, from that day on, she took a certain pleasure in forcing this weekly burden on me, in revenge for the ham.
I was going to end up hating Sundays as much as Shabbat, but exams were approaching, and we had to put an end to our outings until summer vacation.Meanwhile, from time to time I continued to frequent the Dobjinskis. Since he had begun to spend a few minutes every day talking with my sister, Pavel had become more cordial toward me.
This, combined with Janek’s nonstop yakking, made each of my visits to their house extremely trying. I sensed that the family talked about us.
The insinuations and allusions became more and more numerous, and the father, between glasses of wine, began to ask me questions.
A NOVEL THAT EXPLORES THE DIFFICULTY OF SPEAKING ABOUT THE HOLOCAUST.First there is Adam Weinberger’s long childhood, in a world that has no idea yet what is in store for it. The childhood of a lover of illusions, who dreams of changing the world and of freeing his family from the burden of a tradition that he finds unbearable.
The adolescence of a young boy who is unable to express his love for Esther, his admiration for his uncle, his tenderness toward his mother. The helplessness of a young man who sees that dreams and fiction are unable to halt the destruction of this world and of its inhabitants.
Later there are fragments of narrations, the broken mirror that, through more or less well-meaning intermediaries, reflects the flight of this child who has become a man, who no longer believes in dreams, who no longer believes in words -who has taken refuge in gestures, those of his profession, medicine, and those of his great passion, the construction of ships in bottles.
And who flees words and other people to the point of losing his identity. Between the two is there, of which one dares not speak.
And then, in the end, after forgetting, at the end of all the flights, there is a return of childhood from beyond death, the single truth of fiction – of the narration of life.
About the author of Forget Adam WeinbergerVincent Engel – author of Forget Adam WeinbergerVincent Engel was born in Brussels in 1963. When he was five years old, he began to invent stories (the poor, deprived child had no television), and at age nine, he started to try to write them. School for him was clearly a waste of time. When he got home, he wouldn’t waste any of his energies on lessons and homework, either, preferring to devote his time to his passions.
This resulted in a somewhat complicated academic trajectory until he finally went to university, thanks to the tenacious will of his father, for whom a son without a university education was not his son.
Although he hated school and the teachers who didn’t predict much of a future for him, he definitely enjoyed earning a doctorate in literature and becoming a university professor specializing in contemporary French literature. He had a particular interest in issues of memory, especially concerning the Holocaust and what he calls the “desire to remember” (2020).
At the same time, he continued to pursue his writing and chanced upon a crazy publisher couple from Quebec, who would put out his first collections of novellas and become his good friends.
In 2000, he completed Retour à Montechiarro (Fayard, 2001), Volume I of the “World of Asmodée Edern,” which met with great commercial success.
Today Vincent wears many hats: professor at the University of Louvain, novelist, playwright – in particular as friend and right-hand man (although he is left-handed) to the late Franco Dragone for a decade – and screenwriter, not to mention his many collaborations with the press and the media as a columnist and literary critic.
– Translated by Richard Kutner. Richard Kutner is an independent translator of fiction and non-fiction. His translations include After the Roundup, by Joseph Weismann, and Cast Away on the Letter A, by Fred, for which he was awarded a Hemingway Translation Grant from the Book Office of the French Embassy in the United States.
Follow me on Instagram : @vincent_engel_officiel
The post Forget Adam Weinberger appeared first on The Holocaust History - A People's and Survivor History - Remember.org.
Remember.org
After the Roundup is the true memoir of eleven-year-old French Holocaust Survivor Joseph Weismann, who was rounded up in Paris by the French police along with 13,000 other Jews (4,000 of whom were children) in July 1942 and held in appalling conditions in the Vélodrome d’Hiver cycling stadium.
From there, he and his family were transported by cattle car to the transit camp of Beaune-la-Rolande.
Extensive After the Roundup excerpts:
Escape
Chapter 3 of After the Roundup book
Separation from After the Roundup Book
After the Roundup on Amazon1. ARRESTING “FOREIGN” JEWSThe French police will arrest the 22,000 foreign Jewsin Greater Paris. They’ll be taken to Drancy,Compiegne, Pithiviers, and Beaune-la-Rolande. p. 172. THE VELODROME d’HIVERA storm is starting. We’ll sit here.I don’t know how longwe’ll be staying. p. 273. DEPARTUREATTENTION, ATTENTION! THE FOLLOWING FAMILIES GATHERIN THE COURTYARD. IF YOU HEAR YOUR NAME, YOU MUSTCOME AT DAWN TO SIGN UP FOR TOMORROW’S DEPARTURE.AARON, ABRAHAM, ABRAMOVICZ P. 434. DEPORTATIONWhat does he mean, “deported”? p. 475. TEARING APART P.486. SEPARATIONMama….Mama….MAMA!!! P. 4WE’LL MEET AGAIN7. Pitchi Poi…Pitchi Poi….We’ll meet again in Pitchi Poi… P. 508. Summer 1942. Detention camp ofBeaune-la-Rolande, France P. 19. FREEDOM!! P. 68ESCAPEI made it! Joe, I…..I MADE IT!!I MADE IT!!Really? Really truly? What do you see, Joseph? What do you see?There’s….an open space and then a grove of trees. About20 yards I’d say. Joe, do you think your legs will hold up?LIBERATION10 THE AMERICANS! THE AMERICANS!! p. 89RESOLVE – p 9511. I couldn’t understand how good, honest people like my parents or innocent little girls could be murdered only because they were Jewish…..I kept hearing names…..names of places, all of them in Poland.On the radio, in newspapers, they spoke of….of millions.But I didn’t want to hear.Not yet.12. Remember – Never to accept the unacceptable p 120 After the Roundup on AmazonFrench Holocaust Survivor Joseph Weismann’s After the Roundup Graphic NovelPREFACEI was born in Paris in 1931. In 1942, I was eleven years old, and I wore the yellow star.
My parents, my two sisters, and I were arrested on July 16, 1942, during the big Vél’ d’Hiv’ Roundup, before being taken to the Vélodrome d’Hiver cycling stadium. We stayed there five days and five nights, without food, water, or sanitation.
Then we were transferred to the internment camp of Beaune-la-Rolande, in the Loiret region of France. After being held for about two weeks, the rest of my family was sent to the Auschwitz extermination camp, in Poland.
As soon as they arrived, they were gassed and burned in the crematory ovens.
Even with the gendarmes, watchtowers, and barbed wire, I managed to escape from Beaune-la-Rolande with my friend Joe, who was as bold as I was.
Despite the collaboration of the Vichy government, the entire French population cannot be considered guilty. Of all the occupied countries, France had the smallest percentage of French and foreign Jews sent to the camps.
We should also remember that 75 percent of the Jews of France survived. In 1995, President Jacques Chirac finally acknowledged the participation of the French state in the fate of its Jews: the government had indeed abandoned to the occupier a segment of its population that it should have protected. This admission was an immense comfort to me.
Urged on by Simone Veil well before this, I began to reflect on an obligation that was mine as well after such a long silence: the duty to bear witness, the necessity to be willing to tell others about what I had lived through.
For more than forty years, I have visited countless middle and high schools in France and abroad, a commitment that led to my being named Officier de la Légion d’Honneur and to my receiving the Palmes Académiques (for distinguished contributions to education).In Le Mans, where I have lived for decades, the Villaret Middle School became the Joseph Weismann Middle School in 2019, a source of great pride for me.
The narrative that you are about to discover inspired Rose Bosch’s film La Rafle (The Roundup), which was released in 2010. It was essential, though, to tell the rest of the story: in collaboration with Caroline Andrieu and the publisher Michel Lafon, I wrote the memoir After the Roundup, which came out in 2011.
Then a lucky coincidence put me in contact with the artist Laurent Bidot, who, along with the author and scriptwriter Arnaud Delalande, created the graphic novel that you have in your hands. After the film and the book, it was of the greatest importance that it be realized.
This book has a specific goal: the unceasing transmission, to the young as well as the old, of the memory of one of the darkest pages of the history of humanity, the Holocaust (“Shoah” in Hebrew, meaning “catastrophe”), a word that designates the murder of nearly six million European Jews by Nazi Germany and its collaborators.I am one of its last survivors.
By means of this testimony, I wish to continue to inform people so that this tragedy never occurs again.
For my entire life, I have borne the terrible pain caused by the loss of my loved ones. But I have also developed a determination and an optimism that have succeeded in bringing down mountains, no doubt molding myself into an “example of psychological resilience,” as the psychiatrist Boris Cyrulnik would say.
I am now ninety years old.
But I can still convey one last message: never accept the unacceptable. See on AmazonAfter the Roundup – EscapeFrench Holocaust Survivor Joseph Weismann’s Story from the Original BookWe begin a methodical exploration of the camp. Only the entrance gate isn’t protected by tight rows of barbed wire, but it immediately appears impassable to us. It’s guarded by several teams of gendarmes, inside and out.
So we’ll have to deal with the barbed wire, no matter how sharp and thick it is. Going over the top of it is out of the question: First of all, it’s too high—more than two yards from the looks of it.
And it seems to extend over a long distance, so we could be seen too easily. We consider digging, but the soil, dried up by the summer heat, is too hard.
One last option presents itself to us, the one that will work: separate the metal wires to create a passage.
The camp is shaped like a rectangle, and there’s a watchtower at each corner.
At night, the police sweep the open area and the edges with spotlights, ready to fire at anything that moves. We might as well try to escape in the daytime.
“We need to choose the moment when there’s the most activity,” Joe suggests.Together we exclaim, “Lunchtime!”At noon, everyone assembles in front of the food shed for the only meal of the day.
Of course, no one wants to run the risk of missing lunch, so it’s there that all the guards’ eyes are focused while the food is being given out—about two hours in total.
Joe is worried. “The barbed wire is really thick … We’re gonna be skinned alive.”
“You’re right, but we don’t have any choice. We’re going to have to equip ourselves … Do you know where to find some sturdy clothes?”
He knows. The clothes left behind by everyone who’s passed through the camp have all been put in one of the barracks.
We sneak inside unnoticed. Sweaters, pants, and shirts are piled up on the bedsteads, with no regard for size or shape. No problem—we do the sorting ourselves …
Toward the end of the morning, with the August sun shooting out its hottest rays, here we are, dressed for wintertime: two pairs of underwear, two pairs of pants, two shirts, and a thick wool beret on our shaved heads, everything in the darkest colors we can find, brown and dark green.
We stay far from the others and pretend to be sleeping, leaning against the wall of one of the barracks the way so many other kids do …I imagine that thoughts like mine are racing through Joe’s head. It’s been two days since our parents were taken away.
We haven’t even taken the time to tell each other about our lives. All I know about him is that he lives in the twentieth arrondissement and that he has no brothers or sisters.
We adopted each other spontaneously because we share the same taste for freedom and also maybe a certain clear headedness.
We don’t formulate a plan—we’re barely conscious of what we’re about to do, but we sense that we have to do it.
Something deep inside of us sets off an alarm: We have to get out of here; it’s a question of life or death.
There are no smiles on our faces at the thought of our flight. On the contrary, we’re serious, worried, and filled with emotion.We look at the other children. Some of them aren’t even three years old, and few are as old as we are. Many are sick from what they’ve been eating for weeks, and perhaps even more from the privation they’ve endured for years now.
Some play, oblivious. The rage to live that compels Joe and me to want to escape drives them only to go running through the dust of the camp as they wait to rush into their parents’ arms.
Hope or some kind of reckless unawareness keeps them going, I don’t know. Just like Joe and me in the end, except we’re going in another direction.
They’re all like the two of us: the same yellow star sewn on their chests, the same imprisonment, the same nightmares, the same hunger gnawing at their stomachs—and, in all our hearts, the same boundless love for our fathers and mothers.
The lunch bell rings at the other end of the camp. We watch the children pop out of every corner to go get their piece of bread.The two of us take off.
*
Joe goes first. Flat on his stomach, nose in the dust, he begins to separate the barbed wire to create a kind of tunnel through it on the ground.
But it takes him many minutes to disentangle even one inch because the wires are so tightly enmeshed. It’s nothing like the open wire fences surrounding fields of cows!
The wall before us seems to be made of an impossible tangle of rolls of metal wire. I heard from the grown-ups, when they were still here, that the camp was originally built to keep German soldiers prisoner.
If the security fence around the camp was judged sufficient for solid, well-nourished soldiers, it’s reasonable to conclude that two skinny runts like Joe and me have no chance of escape. Only we’re absolutely not reasonable.
Fortunately, Joe is big … After an hour of effort and perseverance, he’s succeeded in creating a passage just wide enough for someone his size, and now that it’s long enough, I slide in behind him.We advance at the pace of a sickly snail through the mass of metallic brambles so thick that the sunlight can barely penetrate it, but we’re still moving forward. And we have plenty of time: it’s not like in school.
No one’s taking attendance, and no one’s waiting for us. And if we’re not there tonight in our dormitory for lights out, no one’s going to notice.
Even if a guard making his rounds passes by the hole we made in the barbed wire, he’ll have to bend down to see it. I wouldn’t say we were calm, but our adventure seems to be off to a pretty good start.
Joe is breathing hard in front of me. My nose is on his heels. There’s no real reason to be this close except to encourage him.
All of his precautions are in vain: protecting his hands with the sleeves of his shirt to separate the wires one by one, he still tears up his fingers.
“Ow! These damned things really hurt!”
“Joe, be quiet! You’re going to attract attention!”
“Easy for you to say. I’m bleeding everywhere.”
“It’s all right. It’s all right. We’re moving ahead.”“Well, I can’t keep doing this. It’s your turn.”There’s one problem: the passageway he’s made isn’t wide enough for us to pass each other, even though I’ve enlarged it a little. We crawl backward toward the camp. I get out, Joe follows me, and I creep back into the tunnel, with Joe right behind me.
We hold our breath for a few seconds. Nothing happens. There’s still the same noise, the same sobs, the same shouts of children who have lost all control of themselves.
No one saw us, no gendarme on his rounds, no policeman from his watchtower, probably because of the thickness of the barbed wire.
My index fingers and thumbs form pliers precise enough to grab hold of the wires and separate them one by one. I’m panting and cursing like my friend before me, but soon I clear a four-inch-long passage wide enough for our shoulders.
I suddenly move my head, and my beret gets stuck on the barbs. Is it lice, fleas, scabies, or scratches from the wires? I’m not sure what’s itching.Besides, pretty soon I don’t feel anything. Neither the blood flowing down my hands, elbows, and neck nor the skin being peeled off my knees from rubbing against the ground. I hear Joe breathing behind me, but we don’t speak.
We have no need to urge each other on. And we have to conserve our strength, because this is a long–a very long–procedure.
How long has it been since we started to make our way through this mass of barbed wire? It seems like hours.
In fact, it has been hours, but we’re unaware. Once again, we’ve lost the notion of time. We have only one idea in our minds: pass under this wall of metal, make it out, and stand in the fresh air of freedom.
We have no choice: it’s not hard to imagine what would happen to us if we were to go back. We have no knowledge that elsewhere members of the Resistance are joining forces and singing “Freedom guides our footsteps.”But it’s the idea of this same freedom that helps us to endure our painful crawl. We’re exhausted, but in no way discouraged, firmly convinced that we’re going to succeed.
We’re right. After many hours, I catch a glimpse of brighter light. I redouble my effort. Anesthetized by the pain, my hands no longer feel anything.
I pick up the pace, helped by luck: the network of metal wires is a little less dense near the outside of the enclosure. Suddenly, right in front of me, I see a hole about eight inches in diameter already formed in the wires.
Could some villager secretly have tried to create a passage into the camp to see what was going on there? Or to help prisoners escape? Who knows? In any case, he didn’t finish the job. Joe and I, on the other hand, have almost completed our work.
With my last remaining strength, I create a tunnel to the hole I just discovered. I take off my beret, and, in a gesture of rage, I throw it outside.
“Joe, my beret is free!”
“Dickhead! I don’t believe it! You still need it!”“I don’t care. Maybe I’m not out yet, but my beret is, and I’m planning to join it!”I hear my friend grumbling behind me. “What a moron! He’s going to cut his head open at the last minute … Whatever got into me to try this with such a halfwit?”
“Joe, keep your insults to yourself. We made it!”
“We made it? I don’t believe it.”
“It’s true, I swear.”
“What do you see?”
There’s an open space. We’re going to have to run a little to reach the trees. I’d say … about twenty yards. Are your legs still working?”
“Don’t worry—they’re fine … Get a move on, and wave to me when you’re there, OK?”
“OK!”
I pick up my beret and launch myself like a rocket. My shoes race forward, and my little sparrow’s feet follow them as best they can.I squeeze my fists with all my remaining strength. It’s the most beautiful run of my life—I fly, I slide, I skid, and finally I throw myself into the ditch! I feel like shouting with joy, like dancing, like swinging from the branches like a monkey.
In a fraction of second, however, the little voice in my head brings me back to reality: Calm down, Joseph, calm down. You’re only halfway there. There’s still Joe …
No chance that I’ll forget him. I’m fully aware of the fact that I couldn’t have succeeded without him. This little, slightly chubby guy, hardly any heftier than me really, has earned his freedom as much as I have.
I lie flat on my stomach in the grass and study the space separating us. About as long as a school yard. If a gendarme, up in his watchtower, catches sight of Joe, it’s all over.
I can see only shapes up there: I can’t make out which way the guards are facing. We’ll have to take our chances. Joe is watching me, on the lookout for the slightest sign. I wave him over.
He springs up like a goat. In less time than it takes to tell about it, he’s already on the ground next to me, sweating, panting, really in bad shape but alive and free!No troubling sounds come from the camp. The gendarmes didn’t see us, or they didn’t want to see us—we don’t care which. Joe catches his breath and extends his hand.
“We did it, Joseph! We did it!”
“We did it, but you’re a mess!”
He bursts out laughing. “Look who’s talking!”
What time must it be? We started to inch our way through the barbed wire when the lunch bell sounded. Now the sun is much lower in the sky, and it’s not as hot.
It must be late in the afternoon. So it took us at least five hours to make our way through that briar patch of metal. How many yards did we go? Fifteen, I’m sure, maybe more.
“Joseph, we can’t hang around here too long.”
“I know. But I’m exhausted.”
“Come, let’s get away from here.”
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Members of the Royal 22e Regiment in audience with Pope Pius XIIThe legacy of Pope Pius XII, born Eugenio Pacelli, is fraught with controversy due to his role—or lack thereof—during World War II and the Holocaust.
The extent of his knowledge about the Holocaust remains a topic of intense debate among historians, theologians, and scholars. This expanded discussion aims to delve deeper into historical references that can shed light on what the Pope knew.
This blog post examines historical evidence, including correspondence and diplomatic communications, to better understand what Pope Pius XII knew about the Holocaust.
With the recent release of another letter showing the Vatican had information about the Holocaust has recently been released:
“The letter, dated Dec. 14, 1942, was written by Father Lother Koenig, a Jesuit who was in the anti-Nazi resistance in Germany and addressed to the pope’s personal secretary at the Vatican, Father Robert Leiber, also a German.
Vatican archivist Giovanni Coco told the Corriere that the importance of the letter was “enormous, a unique case” because it showed the Vatican had information that labor camps were actually death factories.
In the letter, Koenig tells Leiber that sources had confirmed that about 6,000 Poles and Jews a day were being killed in “SS-furnaces” at the Belzec camp in southeastern Poland.
The camp was about 20 km (12 miles) northwest of the town of Rava-Ruska, a railway center that was then also part of German-occupied Poland but is now in western Ukraine.”
Letter shows Pope Pius XII probably knew about Holocaust early on By Philip Pullella
Early Warnings to Pope Pius XII about the HolocaustPope Pius XII ascended to the papacy in March 1939, just months before World War II began—his earlier role as the Papal Nuncio in Germany from 1917 to 1929.
He developed an intricate network of contacts, offering him a ringside view of the rise of Adolf Hitler and the Nazi party. This diplomatic experience set the stage for how Pius XII would interact with the Nazis during the war.
In the early years of World War II, the Pope received multiple warnings about the mass killings of Jews. Notably, in 1941, reports from the bishops in Poland highlighted large-scale deportations and killings.
Similarly, Jan Karski, a Polish underground operative, met with American and British officials and religious authorities, including members of the Vatican, to provide eyewitness accounts of mass killings.
In 1942, the Allies issued the “Joint Declaration by Members of the United Nations,” which specifically mentioned the mass extermination of European Jews. The information was so alarming that it was broadcast globally, including on Vatican Radio.
“From all the occupied countries, Jews are being transported in conditions of appalling horror and brutality to Eastern Europe.
In Poland, which has been made the principal Nazi slaughterhouse, the ghettos established by the German invader are being systematically emptied of all Jews except a few highly skilled workers required for war industries.
None of those taken away are ever heard of again.” – Excerpt from the Joint Declaration shared on Vatican Radio Broadcast, 1942.
“Pius XII had already prepared the text of a public protest against the persecution of the Jews.
Shortly before this text was sent to L’Osservatore Romano, news reached him of the disastrous consequences of the Dutch bishops’ initiative.
He concluded that public protests, far from alleviating the fate of the Jews, aggravated their persecution and he decided that he could not take the responsibility of his own intervention having similar and probably even much more serious consequences.
Therefore he burnt the text he had prepared. .” Pius XII as he really was, 13/02/1999 by Peter Gumpel in The Tablet
Vatican Diplomatic Channels: A Balancing Act RevisitedPope Pius XII kept diplomatic channels with Nazi Germany, primarily through the Apostolic Nuncio Cesare Orsenigo in Berlin, who held his position from before the war started until its conclusion.
The Papal Nuncio was in a precarious position; his role was to maintain lines of communication with a regime that was antithetical to the teachings of the Church.
New Year’s reception for Hitler in Berlin. – In the foreground: Foreign Minister von Ribbentrop in conversation with Nuncio Cesare Orsenigo. In the background: Leader and Chancellor Adolf Hitler. Attribution: Bundesarchiv, Bild 183-H26878 / CC-BY-SA 3.0Historically, Papal Nuncios acted as diplomatic mediators. Their task is to maintain relationships with host countries while upholding the tenets of the Catholic faith.
Orsenigo had reported as early as 1940 that there were rumblings about a “final solution” within Nazi circles. While the document did not outline specifics, it indicated that the Vatican was not entirely in the dark about the extreme actions the Nazis were planning.
The Vatican’s open channels with Nazi Germany present a particularly complex dimension to Pope Pius XII’s role during World War II.
Communication with the Nazis was a double-edged sword. They offered the Pope some leverage and vital intelligence. They also made the Vatican susceptible to accusations of complicity through silence.
Perspective of Other Countries: The Media LandscapeComparing the Vatican’s knowledge to what was publicly available at the time offers an additional layer of complexity. Newspapers and media outlets in other countries reported Nazi atrocities by 1941, albeit often in a piecemeal fashion.
The New York Times, for instance, published articles on mass killings of Jews as early as 1941. Similarly, the BBC was broadcasting reports about the killings, and the information even made its way to neutral countries like Sweden.
However, what sets the Vatican apart is its extensive network of clergy and nuncios in various countries, which could have acted as additional intelligence sources.
The Catholic Church was present in nearly every country involved in the war, from the Axis Powers to the Allies and neutral states.
In this context, it’s reasonable to assume that the Pope’s knowledge wasn’t solely based on diplomatic communiqués but also church networks.
A Balancing Act: Diplomacy and Ethical ResponsibilityMaintaining diplomatic relations with Nazi Germany was like walking a tightrope. On the one hand, the Vatican needed to keep these channels open to gather intelligence and exert influence where possible.
On the other hand, by maintaining diplomatic relations without public condemnation, the Vatican risked appearing complicit or, at the very least, complacent.
Imagine a doctor who has a patient with a highly contagious disease. The doctor must maintain contact to provide treatment but risks spreading the disease to other patients.
Similarly, the Vatican had to balance its moral duty to intervene with the diplomatic repercussions that could result from any such intervention.
Complexity in RetrospectWhen examined through history, the Vatican’s diplomatic balancing act with Nazi Germany remains intensely scrutinized.
While the Pope had several avenues of knowledge—from Orsenigo’s reports to Church networks and public media—how he acted on that knowledge is still debatable.
The decision to opt for quiet diplomacy over public condemnation is not black and white, and scholars continue to dissect the nuances of this complex issue.
Public Silence, Private Actions?Pope Pius XII’s public silence about the Holocaust is perhaps the most criticized aspect of his wartime conduct.
The Pope’s defenders argue that he opted for quiet diplomacy, working behind the scenes to save Jews by facilitating visas and helping them escape.
“…the Catholic Church, under the pontificate of Pius XII, was instrumental in saving at least 700,000, but probably as many as 860,000, Jews from certain death at Nazi hands….
These figures, small as they are in comparison with our six million martyrs whose fate is beyond consolation, exceed by far those saved by all other churches, religious institutions and rescue organizations combined.” Three Popes and the Jews, Pinchas Lapide, Hawthorn, 1967, pps. 214-15. Lapide was a Jewish historian and diplomat.
The Pope addressed the issues of racial persecution in the following terms in his 1942 Christmas address:
“Humanity owes this vow to those hundreds of thousands who, without any fault on their part, sometimes only because of their nationality or race, have been consigned to death or to a slow decline [also translated: “marked down for death or gradual extinction”]. Ritner, Carol and Roth, John K. (eds.). 2002, p. 3. Pope Pius XII and the Holocaust
Pope Pius XII reportedly used diplomatic backchannels to save Jews.
For instance, he provided visas and facilitated passage to safe countries. However, the real scale and effectiveness of these quiet efforts remain hotly debated topics.
Ethical and Moral QuandariesThe Pope’s silence raises complex ethical questions. A public condemnation might have endangered Catholics and Jews in occupied territories.
Some argue that a more vocal condemnation from the Pope could have swayed Catholic nations allied with Germany or at least mobilized public opinion.
A school of thought suggests that a vocal papal intervention might have pushed Hitler to expedite his genocidal plans as an act of defiance.
It could have led to severe repercussions for the Church and the Jews in occupied territories.
Unpacking the Vatican Archives: A Deeper DiveThe Vatican Secret Archives, now more accessibly known as the Vatican Apostolic Archives, has long been a source of mystery and speculation.
The recent opening of these archives has offered scholars a treasure trove of documents that provide new perspectives on Pope Pius XII’s role during World War II.
While some documents corroborate the Pope’s knowledge of the Holocaust, others reveal diplomatic communications where the Pope prioritized the preservation of the Church.
One controversial document is a 1942 letter from the U.S. representative to the Vatican, Myron Taylor, stating that the Pope was “convinced that he had done all in his power.”
But the Pope and the Nuncio were not the only figures involved; several other key players within the Vatican also had significant roles.
Domenico Tardini and Giovanni MontiniTwo individuals who frequently appear in these archives are Domenico Tardini and Giovanni Montini, later Pope Paul VI.
Both were close advisors to Pope Pius XII. Tardini was the head of the Vatican Secretariat of State, while Montini was his Undersecretary.
Their roles were vital in shaping Vatican policy and crafting secret diplomatic missions.
Documents show that both were involved in internal discussions regarding how to respond to reports about the Holocaust.
These advisors helped the Pope strategize the Vatican’s next moves like a chess game with high stakes.
The Jewish Delegation to the VaticanAnother fascinating aspect of the archives is the details about a Jewish delegation that sought an audience with Pope Pius XII.
The delegation presented evidence of the ongoing Holocaust to secure a public papal denouncement.
While no public denouncement came, documents suggest that the Pope took the delegation’s information seriously.
Some scholars argue that the Pope’s subsequent actions, including the extension of aid and shelter to Jews in Rome, were influenced by this meeting.
Consider it a consultation with a subject-matter expert that subtly but significantly changes your course of action.
Correspondence with Other Religious FiguresThe archives also unveil correspondence between Pope Pius XII and other religious figures, both Catholic and non-Catholic.
Leaders of Protestant churches in Germany, for instance, communicated their dilemmas and actions concerning the Nazis. Additionally, letters from Catholic bishops in Eastern Europe detail the atrocities they witnessed.
Such letters corroborated what the Pope was hearing through other channels and likely weighed on his moral calculus.
The U.S. and the VaticanAnother revealing piece of the puzzle is the correspondence between Myron Taylor, the U.S. representative to the Vatican, and Pope Pius XII.
In these documents, Taylor expresses that the U.S. government would appreciate a more assertive stance from the Vatican against the Nazis.
The Pope’s replies give an insight into his thought process as he navigated the diplomatic intricacies between condemning evil and protecting the Church.
Nuanced ComplexityThe documents in the Vatican archives add a layer of nuanced complexity to Pope Pius XII’s wartime role. They illustrate the agonizing decisions that must be made and reveal that the Pope did not make them in a vacuum.
Advisors, delegations, foreign diplomats, and other religious figures all shaped the Vatican’s policy during this dark period.
Conclusion – Pope Pius XII and the HolocaustThe question of what Pope Pius XII knew about the Holocaust is entangled in a web of diplomacy, ethical considerations, and historical contexts.
Evidence suggests that he had early warnings and detailed information about Nazi atrocities.
Whether his public silence or quiet diplomacy approach was the best course of action remains a topic of ongoing debate.
Key Takeaways:
References:1. “The Pope and Mussolini: The Secret History of Pius XI and the Rise of Fascism in Europe” by David I. Kertzer 2. Vatican Secret Archives 3. “Hitler’s Pope: The Secret History of Pius XII” by John Cornwell 4. Correspondence between the Holy See and the German Reich 5. New York Times Archives detailing Holocaust reports during World War II 6. BBC Historical Archives on World War II broadcasts 7. Vatican Apostolic Archives, Records Relating to World War II and Pope Pius XII
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Lani Silver – Bay Area Holocaust Oral History Project founder and friend of Remember.orgIn the early days of Remember.org, I went out seeking content to share on this new thing called the Internet. That’s where I met Lani Silver (1948-2009).
Since most of the organizations housing the essential interviews and content about the Holocaust were run by Jewish organizations, trying something new and not knowing me or my background was a big challenge.
Not for Lani Silver. She welcomed me to the Oral History Project, and upon hearing the story of what I was beginning in 1993, she introduced me to her project.
She told me about rock impresario Bill Graham founded it. However, I later learned while he did help it out immensely, the founder was Lani.
And she was generous as she was gracious. She immediately shared videos with me and gained permission from the survivors to share it on Remember.org:
Those transcriptions I did and shared with her formed the early foundation of this site. I am not only grateful; Lani’s example was one that I’ve found time and again in sharing stories of survival.
People are willing to help and share so students and teachers can gain access to these critical experiences. Her generosity is hopefully extended here as well, as we’ve never charged anyone to share their content and share it worldwide with people so that we all remember.
Remembering Lani SilverLani Silver was a professor of political science and women’s studies at San Francisco State University. She was also a social activist for many years and many causes.
In 1981, she founded the Bay Area Holocaust Oral History Project, which collected and preserved the stories of Holocaust survivors. The project eventually grew to include over 1,700 interviews.
Silver’s work with the Bay Area Holocaust Oral History Project was groundbreaking. It was one of the first projects to collect and preserve the stories of Holocaust survivors.
Scholars, educators, and filmmakers have used the project’s work to learn more about the Holocaust.
Here’s some background for all who haven’t had the privilege to meet Ms. Silver, a guiding force in collecting firsthand stories of survival and hardship.
Her journey began in 1985 when she told The Chronicle that these recordings were more than just historical accounts; they were deeply emotional reunions.
“Sometimes the survivors haven’t even told their own children. And when they do, the whole room breaks down. And yes, that includes me,” she said.
For over a decade, Ms. Silver cultivated her solo venture into an army of passionate individuals—interviewers, photographers, and transcribers alike. She was the project’s beating heart until 1997.
Her expertise didn’t go unnoticed. Spielberg consulted her for his oral history mission, the Shoah Foundation. She trained 500 interviewers for Spielberg’s initiative, which now holds tens of thousands of irreplaceable interviews.
But her work didn’t stop at collecting stories; she unearthed heroes lost to time, like Chiune Sugihara, Japan’s consul general in Lithuania during WWII, who saved thousands by handwriting visas.
He died quietly in Japan, but not before Ms. Silver breathed new life into his story. She not only memorialized him in Tokyo but coined him “the Japanese Schindler.” She cemented his legacy through workshops, exhibits, and even an opera.
In 2000, Ms. Silver shifted her focus, not her passion—directing the James Byrd Jr. Racism Oral History Project. Interviewing 2,500 Americans, she peeled back the layers of everyday racism and its painful scars left on ordinary lives.
“Most of us have a standard job or freelance career. Silver’s “job” was working as a passionate activist with a breathtaking list of passionate and important causes.
She even listed her occupation on Facebook as an activist. Her range was from the political battles of the day (women’s issues, liberal politics and campaigns, gay rights and gay marriage, Media Alliance and Jeff Perlman, Obama, Jeff Adachi) to the unconventional (founding the Bay Area Holocaust Oral History project and later a racism project growing out of the case of James Byrd Jr., who in 1998 was chained to a truck by three white supremacists and dragged to death in Jasper, Texas.) …
Two of Silver’s latest and last passions were the Northern California chapter of the Society of Professional Journalists (where she was an ever passionate board member) and the Chauncey Bailey Investigative Project (where she was a founding member and ever passionate participant).
The Chauncey project was a media coalition that has had much success and fame in investigating the 2007 murder of Oakland Post Editor Chauncey Bailey while investigating the finances of Your Black Muslim Bakery.”
LANI SILVER Teacher, Oral Historian, Activist 1948 – 2009 by Bruce Bruggman
Ms. Silver’s origins are traced back to Lynn, Mass., but her family moved to San Francisco when she was two months old.
“She was the dinner table philosopher, always provoking thought,” her sister Lynne Jacobs noted.
And a trip to Soweto at 19 sparked the activist in her. From then on, she was not just an observer but a participant—taking her nieces and nephews to political rallies and attending protests even when her own life was hanging by a thread.
She was a lifetime learner—earning degrees from the University of San Francisco, San Francisco State University, and the University of Chicago. She lent her voice as a freelance writer and producer for over 30 years.
Lynne said it best,
“From that moment in Soweto, she was an activist.”
An activist, an educator, but most of all, a friend to countless survivors and a beacon for stories that needed to be told.
In addition to her work with the Bay Area Holocaust Oral History Project and the Shoah Foundation, Silver also worked with several other organizations dedicated to Holocaust education and remembrance.
She was a founding member of the Racism Project and the James Byrd Jr. Racism Oral History Project. She also served on the board of directors of the Simon Wiesenthal Center and the Jewish Women’s Archive.
Silver’s work has been recognized with numerous awards, including the American Jewish Committee’s Human Relations Award and the National Women’s History Month Award. She was also named one of the “100 Most Influential People in the Bay Area” by the San Francisco Chronicle.
Lani Silver was a remarkable woman who significantly impacted the world. Her work to preserve the stories of Holocaust survivors has helped to ensure that their experiences will never be forgotten.
She was a tireless advocate for tolerance and understanding, and her legacy will continue to inspire others for many years.
Here are some additional details about Lani Silver’s work:
Her work to preserve the stories of Holocaust survivors has helped to ensure that their experiences will never be forgotten.
Her presence vibrates through her extensive work, challenging us to confront uncomfortable truths. While she may not be here, her vision for a just world endures.
Thank you, Ms. Silver, for your relentless curiosity, activism, and invaluable friendships formed through your work.
Your legacy isn’t just in the stories collected but in the hearts and minds touched and opened.
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The history of Anti-semitism refers to hostility towards Jewish people based on their religion, ethnicity, or culture.
Social Democrats, the Worker’s Party, poster. Source: Dachau Memorial MuseumIt has a long and disturbing history that spans across continents and centuries. Anti-Semitism can take many forms, from casual prejudice to genocidal violence.
Understanding the root causes of anti-Semitism is essential in preventing its recurrence in our society.
Classical and Christian Anti-Semitism
We will explore the historical origins of anti-Semitism, the impact of modernization and genocide, contemporary manifestations of anti-Semitism, and the importance of multiple perspectives in combating it.
• Anti-Semitism has a long and complex history, dating back to the earliest days of Judaism. It was particularly prevalent in the Middle Ages when Jews were often persecuted and expelled from Christian countries.
• During the 17th century there was a rise in anti-Semitism. This is due to several factors such as nationalism, the Protestant Reformation, and the Chmielnicki Uprising.
• Following this the 18th century continues the history of anti-Semitism due to the Enlightenment, French Revolution, and Industrial Revolution.
• Leading into the 19th century, anti-Semitism was most widespread in Germany with the emergence of Nazi ideology. The Holocaust was an unprecedented event in terms of anti-Semitism.
• In the 21st century, anti-Semitism continues to be a problem. Contributing factors include populism, social media, financial crises, and conflicts in the Middle East.
Chmielnicki Uprising – Nikolay Ivasyuk. “Entry of Bogdan Khmelnitsky to Kiev”I. Roots of Anti-SemitismThe history of Anti-Semitism has deep roots in ancient and medieval history, where Jews were often scapegoated and blamed for societal problems.
Anti-Semitism, or hostility towards Jews, is unfortunately not a new concept. Its roots can be traced back to ancient times, with examples of discrimination and persecution throughout history.
However, it was during the Middle Ages when anti-Semitism reached a particularly high level. Jews were often seen as outsiders, blamed for various issues.
They faced discrimination, violence, and even forced expulsion from many Christian countries.
One of the most notorious examples of medieval anti-Semitism was the Crusades, a series of religious wars in which Christians attempted to retake the Holy Land from Muslim control.
During the Crusades, Jews were often targeted by Christians, and many were killed or forced to convert to Christianity.
17th Century History of AntisemitismThe Reformation and the Chmielnicki Uprising
The 17th century was a tumultuous time for many reasons, but for European Jews, it was particularly challenging.
Anti-Semitism was on the rise, fueled by factors such as nationalism, religious conflicts stemming from the Protestant Reformation, and the devastating Chmielnicki Uprising.
Nationalism led to a sense of competition between different groups, and Jews were often seen as a threat to the nation.
The Protestant Reformation led to a split in the Christian Church, and this led to increased tensions between Catholics and Protestants.
The Reformation also opened the door to anti-Semitic rhetoric, with some Protestant leaders accusing Jews of being responsible for the death of Jesus.
“Public Enemy” 1933 by Paul WeberJews were often seen as being affiliated with the Catholic Church, and they were therefore seen as a threat to the Protestant way of life.
Specific examples of anti-Semitism in the 17th centuryActions like the expulsion of Jews from Spain and Portugal, the burning of synagogues in Germany, and the mass murder of Jews in Poland reveal the pattern.
In 1648, there was a wave of anti-Semitic violence in Europe known as the Chmielnicki Uprising. This uprising was sparked by a dispute between a Polish nobleman and a Jewish tax collector, and it resulted in the deaths of tens of thousands of Jews.
The Chmielnicki Uprising, also known as the Cossack–Polish War, the Khmelnytsky Uprising, the Khmelnytsky massacre, or the Khmelnytsky Insurrection, was a Cossack rebellion that took place between 1648 and 1654.
Sparked by a dispute between a Polish nobleman and a Jewish tax collector, and it resulted in the deaths of tens of thousands of Jews.
It began in April 1648, when Bogdan Chmielnicki, a Cossack leader, led a revolt against Polish rule.This action quickly spread throughout Ukraine, and it soon turned into a full-scale war. The Polish army was defeated in several battles, and the Cossacks began to massacre Jewish communities throughout Ukraine.
The Chmielnicki Uprising was a major turning point in the history of Eastern Europe. It led to the destruction of the Polish-Lithuanian Commonwealth, and it created a new power vacuum in the region.
The uprising also had a profound impact on the Jewish people, as it resulted in the deaths of hundreds of thousands of Jews.
The events of this era had a profound impact on Jewish history, shaping the way that Jews were perceived by others and influencing their self-understanding.
Despite the challenges, however, the Jewish community persisted, finding ways to adapt, survive, and even thrive in the face of adversity.
It’s a complex and difficult period to study, but one that offers many insights into how prejudice and discrimination can shape the course of history.
Modern Anti-Semitism
II. The Impact of Modernization on Anti-SemitismThe Enlightenment, the French Revolution, and the Industrial Revolution all brought significant changes to European societies and their relationship with the Jews.
While some Enlightenment thinkers championed the idea of equality and religious tolerance, others reinforced anti-Semitic ideas based on racial theories.
The French Revolution’s emancipation of Jews was a significant turning point in Jewish history, yet it also led to the rise of modern anti-Semitism, where Jews were accused of being outsiders, and a threat to national identity.
The Industrial Revolution’s new economic opportunities gave rise to reactionary movements that blamed Jews for economic hardships.
Antisemitic picture by Thomas Rowlandson (1756-1827). It states: ”Solomon enjoys himself with two pretty Christian girls”The 18th Century – Enlightenment, Revolution, and Anti-Semitism HistoryThe 18th century was a time of many changes and developments. The Enlightenment brought new ideas about science, reason, and individual freedom that challenged traditional ways of thinking.
The French Revolution inspired political upheaval and radical change in Europe. And the Industrial Revolution transformed the way people lived and worked.
However, amidst all these new developments, the 18th century was also a time of widespread antisemitism.
The Enlightenment was a period of intellectual and philosophical progress that emphasized reason and science over superstition and tradition.
This led to a more tolerant view of other religions and cultures, but it also led to a more critical view of Judaism.
Jews were seen as backward and superstitious, and they were often criticized for their religious practices.
The French Revolution was a period of political and social upheaval that began in 1789. The Revolution led to the overthrow of the monarchy and the establishment of a republic.
This led to a more tolerant view of Jews, as they were now seen as citizens of the republic.
However, the Revolution also led to a rise in anti-Semitism, as Jews were seen as being part of the old order that had been overthrown.The Industrial Revolution was a period of rapid economic and social change that began in the late 18th century. The Industrial Revolution led to the rise of a new class of wealthy industrialists, and it also led to the rise of a new class of poor workers.
This led to a great deal of social and economic tension, and Jews were often seen as being part of the problem.
Jews were often seen as greedy and exploitative, and they were blamed for the problems of the poor.
Anti-Semitism became more widespread, and it became more violent. This led to the expulsion of Jews from many countries, and it also led to the deaths of many Jews.
Here are some specific historical examples of anti-Semitism in the 18th century:
Many people in Europe held deep prejudices against Jewish people, and these prejudices manifested in everything from economic restrictions to violent attacks.
Despite the progress made in other areas, the persistence of antisemitism reminds us that change is a slow and complicated process.
19th Century history of Anti-SemitismContemporary etching depicting a so-called Hepp-Hepp Riot against Jews in Frankfurt. This was one of the many anti-Semitic riots that took place in Germany in 1819 amidst a climate of anti-Semitism fueled by various anti-Jewish publications.The 19th century saw the rise of anti-Semitic sentiments in many parts of Europe, but perhaps nowhere was it more widespread than in Germany.
The roots of Nazi ideology can be traced back to this period when many Germans believed that their economic struggles were due to the presence of Jewish people in their society.
This dangerous idea gained traction, culminating in the atrocities committed by the Nazi regime during World War II.
In Germany, the rise of nationalism and the Industrial Revolution led to a new form of anti-Semitism, which was based on racial hatred.
Specific examples of anti-Semitism in the 19th century include the Dreyfus Affair in France and the pogroms in Russia.The Industrial Revolution led to a great deal of social and economic change, and this led to increased tensions between different groups.
Jews were often seen as being associated with the Industrial Revolution, and they were therefore seen as a threat to the traditional way of life.
Socialism led to a belief that Jews were responsible for all of the problems in the world, and this led to increased anti-Semitism.
While anti-Semitic sentiment has decreased in the decades since it is important to remember the history that led to such devastating consequences.
Understanding the complex social, economic, and political factors that contributed to the rise of Nazi anti-Semitism can help us recognize and combat harmful ideologies in our present-day society.
III. Genocidal Anti-Semitism in the 20th CenturyThe most infamous example of genocidal anti-Semitism is Nazi ideology, which led to the Holocaust and the murder of six million Jews.
An anti-semitic sign: “Recognize the true enemy with the yellow star.” Source: Dachau Memorial MuseumThe Holocaust was a catastrophic event in human history and is a reminder of the devastating consequences of unchecked hatred and bigotry.
Other examples of genocidal anti-Semitism include efforts in Russia and Ukraine that targeted Jewish communities in the early 20th century.
IV. Contemporary Anti-SemitismContemporary manifestations of anti-Semitism include right-wing ideology, online hate speech, conflicts in the Middle East, and social tensions resulting from financial crises.
Populist movements have gained prominence in recent years and often promote anti-Semitic conspiracy theories.
The global financial crisis of 2008 led to a rise in unemployment and poverty in many countries. This led to a sense of anger and frustration among many people, and some of this anger was directed at Jews.
The conflict in the Middle East has also contributed to the rise of anti-Semitism. The conflict is often seen as a religious conflict, and this has led to a rise in anti-Semitic sentiment among some people.
Social media platforms enable the spread of hate speech and misinformation.
In addition to these factors, there are also new reasons for anti-Semitism in the 21st century.For example, some people believe that Jews are responsible for the spread of globalization and the decline of traditional values. Others believe that Jews are responsible for the rise of terrorism and the spread of war.
These new reasons for anti-Semitism are often based on conspiracy theories and stereotypes about Jews. They are not based on facts, and they are not supported by evidence. However, they have been used to justify violence and discrimination against Jews.
The conflicts in the Middle East have also fueled anti-Semitic ideas and rhetoric.One of the largest sources of anti-Semitic activity in the 21st century is the Middle East and North Africa.
Anti-Semitism has been fueled by anti-Israel sentiments, conspiracy theories, and extremist ideologies. In some countries in the region, Jews are openly targeted and subjected to violence, discrimination, and persecution.
In the 21st century, there have been numerous examples of anti-Semitic acts in the Middle East and Africa. Ranging from verbal and physical assaults to legislation and policies that discriminate against Jews.
Examples of the recent history of Anti-Semitism: Iran* – In Iran, anti-Semitism is widespread and often institutionalized. Iranian leaders regularly make anti-Semitic statements, including denying the Holocaust and calling for the destruction of Israel.
Additionally, the government sponsors anti-Semitic media outlets and events. Including Holocaust denial conferences and cartoons that depict Jews in an inflammatory manner.
These examples illustrate the continued prevalence of anti-Semitism in the Middle East and Africa, despite efforts to combat it.The actions of the Israeli government and military influence anti-Semitic attitudes and acts in various countries, including the United States, the Middle East, and Western Europe.
West Bank & Gaza Map 2007 (Settlements)Some of these actions include:
These are a few examples of the actions of the Israeli government and military that have influenced anti-Semitic attitudes and acts in various countries
Here are a few sources that provide information on the influence of Israeli actions on anti-Semitism:
“Israel/Palestine: Growing Abuse in West Bank Killings, Unlawful Home Demolitions of Palestinians Increase” by Human Rights WatchThis report provides an overview of the Israeli government’s policy of building and expanding settlements in the West Bank and its impact on the peace process and human rights. It discusses how this policy has fueled anti-Semitic attitudes and acts, particularly in countries with large Muslim populations.
“Israel Gaza blockade must be completely lifted” by Amnesty International –This report provides insights into the Israeli government’s blockade of the Gaza Strip and its impact on the human rights and well-being of its residents. It discusses how the blockade has fueled anti-Semitic attitudes and acts, particularly in countries with large Muslim populations.
These sources provide a starting point for understanding the influence of Israeli actions on anti-Semitic attitudes and acts in various countries.
Another region with a significant rise in anti-Semitism is Europe. In recent years, there has been an increase in anti-Semitic incidents and hate crimes, particularly in countries such as France, Germany, and the United Kingdom.
This is driven by a variety of factors, including the rise of far-right extremism, anti-Israel sentiments, and the dissemination of conspiracy theories.
In the United States, there has also been a rise in anti-Semitic incidents in recent years.Driven by a combination of factors, including the rise of far-right extremism, anti-Israel sentiments, and the dissemination of conspiracy theories.
Recent examples of anti-Semitism in the US: Pittsburgh Synagogue Shooting (2018): On October 27, 2018, a gunman entered the Tree of Life Synagogue in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, and opened fire. Killing 11 people and injuring several others. This attack was the deadliest anti-Semitic attack in the history of the United States. It was motivated by the attacker’s hatred of Jews and support for anti-Semitic conspiracy theories. * Jersey City Kosher Grocery Store Attack (2019): On December 10, 2019, two attackers entered a kosher grocery store in Jersey City, New Jersey. They ended up killing 4 people and injuring several others. * Poway Synagogue Shooting (2019): On April 27, 2019, a gunman entered the Chabad of Poway synagogue in Poway, California. This attack killed one person and injured several others. * Hanukkah Party Stabbing (2019):* On December 28, 2019, a man armed with a machete entered a Hanukkah celebration in Monsey, New York. He began attacking attendees, injuring several people.
These incidents of anti-Semitic violence are just a few examples of the threat of anti-Semitism around the world.
V. Multiple Perspectives on Anti-SemitismThere are different interpretations of the causes and motives of anti-Semitism. Some see it as a form of prejudice rooted in societal and historical factors. Others frame it as a political issue.
Debates also exist over how best to counter anti-Semitism. Some advocate for dialogue and education, others argue for stronger law enforcement measures.
Using multiple perspectives is essential in tackling such a complex issue that affects many communities worldwide.
Conclusion: Understanding Anti-Semitism HistoryAnti-Semitism has a long and disturbing history that continues to shape our current times. It is important to understand its roots and manifestations to prevent it from spreading further.
Multiple perspectives are necessary to find solutions to this problem.
Everyone has a role in promoting tolerance, combating bigotry and hate in all its forms. Creating a world where all people can live free from the fear of oppression and discrimination.
This long and complex history of anti-Semitism is heartbreaking. It is also essential to acknowledge an work toward a world where prejudice and hate have no place.
Various factors contribute to the persistence of this form of prejudice.Including populism, social media, financial crises, and conflicts in the Middle East.
Populist leaders often fuel anti-Semitic sentiments by scapegoating Jewish communities for societal issues.
Social media also plays a role in spreading hateful messages and conspiracy theories. Moreover, financial crises and conflicts can increase feelings of resentment and prejudice toward Jewish populations.
It is important to acknowledge the complexity of factors that sustain antisemitism in the 21st century. We can work towards creating a more inclusive and accepting world.
The post Understanding the History of Anti-semitism appeared first on The Holocaust History - A People's and Survivor History - Remember.org.
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My name is Rena Quint, a Holocaust survivor.
I was born December 18, 1935 in Piotrkow, Poland, and my name was Freida Lichtenstein. My parents, Sara and Yitzchak, had lived in Piotrkow for a long time.
My mother came from a large family, they came from a town nearby, and my father was born in Piotrkow.
There are so many nights that I try very hard to stay awake to remember what my mother looked like. What my father looked like, what my brothers looked like, what we did together.
“The Last Sunrise” by Harold Gordon
They Gave Me Life- The Story of Rena Quint Holocaust SurvivorI try so hard to see their faces. To look at my children and my grandchildren and see if I can find their faces in them.
Wish I could remember more. I try so hard to remember, but maybe I’m afraid of remembering. Would like to remember the good times don’t remember the bad times. But I know once the war started, everything was bad.
Because I really have managed to forget so much of my life at that point and start a whole new life. I wish I could remember, but I’m glad that I’m not living in the past.
I had two brothers, two older brothers. One was Yossi and one was David. And my name at that time was Fredzia or Fraidl. I was the youngest, I was the baby.My parents were married in Piotrkow by a very famous rabbi. His name was Rabbi Meir Shapiro. He left Piotrkow to go to Lublin where he built a place called Chachmei Lublin.
When he left, Rabbi Lau took over and he became the rabbi in our home town. He was in The Great Synagogue, but there were many other little shtiblachs and synagogues all around.
My mother was way ahead of her time because she owned a store, a paint store, and my father, apparently, she had put him into business because she had given him two sewing machines.
He became a tailor, but it wasn’t just a tailor for one person, what was one of the gentlemen tailors, where he made suits for many different people.
One of the things that I do remember is the cholent that my mother made. She had a big pot where she put meat, beans, barley and potatoes, and my brothers David and Yossi would put me on a sled.It seemed to me that it was snowing a lot in Piotrkow, and they would pull me to the bakery. Where there were many people who brought pots with cholent in it, and they would bake there all night.
Then on Shabbat afternoon, people would go and get them back and bring them to the house where the aroma, the smell was really the smell of Shabbat.
And I’m sure there must have been lots of company. We lived in the house with four stories, and we had many, many cousins and uncles and neighbors who were like family, and everybody shared cholent together, and we sang together.
And unfortunately, many of those things stopped, and I don’t remember the melodies. When I hear melodies, very often I think: Were these the songs we sang?
Rena Quint – a Polish Holocaust survivor – remembers…I don’t remember what my mother or my father or my brothers looked like. Don’t remember very much about my early childhood. The war started when I was three-and-a-half years old.The war broke out. Germans came into Piotrkow. Everybody was going, scurrying. Nobody knew what was going on.
Planes were coming overhead, tanks were coming in, the German army came in full speed. The Polish army was not prepared for any of this.
People were trying to run into different towns, but it didn’t help very much, because the Germans soon entered those other towns. Many of the people, including my family and my aunts and cousins, all ran down into the basement.
The basement was filled with food, especially potatoes and other things that were left there just in case something like that happened. You can smell the potatoes down there, people came down, it was very cold.
There were dead horses, there were dead dogs, there were dead people, all lying in the gutters. Everybody was just hurrying all around. There was tension that was going through, everybody knew the war had started, life changed.Right away, the first ghetto that was organized when the Nazis came in was Piotrkow. Barbed wire fences were set up all around, and people could not get out of the ghetto.
There wasn’t enough food. People tried to save things beforehand, it was just before Rosh Hashana, but Rabbi Lau told people not to go because it was dangerous to go out in the street. So people started their own minyanim, their own prayer places, in the places they lived on.
At one point, the ghetto got very crowded. People in surrounding towns and villages, little shtetlekh, could not live there.
First in surrounding neighborhoods and then another little town and they moved in, and our house became very, very crowded. People who could not get a place to live lived in the mikvah or in the synagogue, people lived out on the streets.
People tried to help each other. Children couldn’t go to school, so they started schools in homes in smaller neighborhoods where my brothers went to school to learn, like a cheder.At one point, the Germans came, and they took people who were young enough, able-bodied people, like men and women, like my father and my uncle, to slave labor factories. My father and my uncle were taken to the glass factory, where they worked.
They were taken and they started a smaller ghetto over there. I remained in the house with my mother and my brothers.
I think my mother was able to trade a fur coat or shoes or other valuables that she had, if you call those valuables. Maybe jewelry for food, so we did not starve, but many people did, and typhus was rampant, and many people died of that, it was a very contagious disease also. The hospitals were not accessible, so people stayed in their home.
One night in the middle of the night, there was banging out, “Raus, raus, schnell, schnell,” and Germans came in, and they had everybody coming down.
They said,“You can take whatever you want, you’ve got five minutes to leave the house.”What would you take? Everybody took whatever they could. Some people took photographs, thinking they were going to come back.Some took their jewelry thinking they could sell things for it. Others took food, blankets, their babies and their own mothers.
And we had to run down the stairs. We had to run down very, very quickly, soldiers were yelling and batting people over their heads with their sticks and with their guns.
Many people fell and other people fell on top of them until we got out into the big square. From there, we were beaten and we were herded like animals until we got to the synagogue just a few blocks away.
I’m sure as a little girl, I was six years old at this point, I must have been holding on tightly to my mother and she to me and to my brothers.
There was a door in the back of the synagogue, and on the other side of the door there was a man, and I believe he was my uncle, but I have no proof of that, and he beckoned to me and he told me to run.Maybe my mother pushed me, maybe God pushed me. I don’t know where I got the nerve, the courage, but I ran out.
How does a little girl leave her mother? It is impossible. It’s just not natural for a little girl to leave her mother or her mother to leave her.
Somehow or other I ran out, the soldiers easily could have hit me over the head, could have shot me, could have pushed me back. Maybe they didn’t see me, because there was such pandemonium.
There was such chaos, there was such fear and such crying. I don’t know how it was possible, but I ran out.
That was the last time I saw my mother and my brothers. I ran out from that door, they stayed, and they were taken to Treblinka, which was one of the extermination camps in Poland.
This man, who I think was with my father, what was he supposed to be doing with me. What could he possibly do with a little six-year-old girl?First, he hid me, and then he took me to my father, who was working in the glass factory in Hortensia. When we got there, my father kissed me and he hugged me, and then he had to hide me.
Girls were useless; boys under the age of 10 weren’t worth very much either, but boys over the age of 10 could work. So my father said that I was a boy of 10.
How does a little girl of six become a boy of 10? He cut my hair; as a tailor, I guess he had skill of doing that.
The tailor found some old clothes to put on me. He gave me a new name. Instead of my name being Fredzia or Fraidl, it was now Froyim.I learned how to speak Polish in the gender of the male. In English, we don’t have that problem, but in Polish, boys and girls speak differently. Grammar is different. I had to learn to do that.
I had to learn to be very careful when I had to go to the bathroom. My father said to try to keep out of the way as much as possible.
The men helped me, many of the men knew that I didn’t belong there, but they helped me in every way. If somebody of importance came in, they tried to hide me.
In the night time when they were in barracks, I slept next to my father and to my uncle, but one night, apparently, somebody came in.
I was under a blanket, maybe was under the blanket of my uncle or another man, I was fast asleep and was moving around. I didn’t mean to be moving around, but after the soldier left, this man took me and shook me, and said,
“You were told to be still, you were told not to move, and you were moving around, you could have endangered all of us.”And to this day, I’m so sorry that I didn’t realize what I was doing. I tried very hard not to sleep completely in case somebody would come in, that I would not move under somebody’s blanket.
I worked very hard in the glass factory, everybody worked very hard. There were children there, and we were like water carriers.
We had a pail with a ladle and we were supposed to bring it to the workers. The workers, many of them had had like a mask over them, it was very hot, and the ovens in the glass factory worked all the time, and we brought water for men to drink.
I don’t think the Germans cared about being thirsty, but if you wouldn’t, if you wouldn’t drink and you would faint, you wouldn’t work, and their whole purpose was for you to work.
More than anything, I remember that factories. There were these big German Shepherd dogs, and every time one of the soldiers decided to have some fun or he decided to teach us a lesson.He would sic one of those dogs into a group of people, and whoever was the poor person who became the culprit and he had a bite out of his arm. If you couldn’t lift your arm, they would shoot you.
If it got infected, there was no medicine, there were no bandages. Too bad. People were dying of those dog bites.
You never forget the dog bites. No matter how much people tell you don’t be afraid of this big dog, the fear of those dogs never leaves you.
I was in the factory with my father and with my uncle, and they tried very hard to keep me away from everything. We worked very hard, but one day they decided they didn’t want any Jews left in Poland.
Again, there was one of these actions where people came in, and again, we had to get ready and go into a place called the Umschlagplatz, where they had cattle cars waiting.I went with the men, and we were again being pushed and shoved until we got into those cattle cars. Eighty to a hundred people were put into those cattle cars.
There was nothing to eat there, there was nothing to drink, and there was one pail, which was used for the bathroom. Men, women and children use that pail.
It was cold, it was freezing cold, it seems to me it was always cold, there was always snow around.
Finally, we crossed over from the border, from the Polish to the German border. The doors were flung open and we had to jump down from those cattle cars.
The Germans came, and with megaphones, with bullhorns, they made an announcement that we were being taken to camps, men on one side, women on the other. My father now realized he had a problem.
Holocaust survivor Rena Quint’s journeyI was a boy in a man’s camp, but when you go into the concentration camp or whatever where we were going to be sent, everybody knew that you’d have to get undressed.I don’t think the Germans cared about you being clean, even though we were full of lice and fleas and sicknesses and dirt and smells. But they knew that you’d have to get undressed to go into the showers.
If I’d get undressed, my father knew that they would see I’m not one of the men, and they would kill me. They would also kill him and anybody who tried to help us.
When we jumped off the train, he looked around, and he saw a woman who had come from one of the other factories, one of the slave labor camps, and he asked if she would keep an eye on me. He had some pictures.
He gave me those pictures and he said,
“Look at the pictures and see it’s a mother and father and three children, two boys and a girl,” that was one of my brothers and I, and he said,“The war is going to be over right away. Very soon, the war will be over,” and he will meet me in our hometown in Piotrkow.He promised to meet me. Fathers are supposed to keep their promises. My father didn’t keep his promise.
I found a train schedule where he was sent to Buchenwald. ent with my new mother. I don’t remember what she looked like, don’t remember her name, but I know that she saved my life, and I went with her. That was the last time I saw my father, but I had a new mother.
When we finally got to Bergen-Belsen, and so many of the people had either been shot or just fell and died along the way.
We were brought into a big room, and we were told, just the way my father had predicted, to get undressed. The Germans wanted you to get dressed, firstly because we were so filthy, so smelly, so disgusting after those terrible days in the cattle cars.
They wanted you to get washed so that they wouldn’t be around such terrible filth. But the other thing is that if you had anything, they could confiscate everything that you had, and they could give you some old dress or uniform or something like that.We had to get undressed. My father had given me some pictures. Those pictures were important. I was holding them in my hand.
One of the soldiers saw that I was holding. Maybe he thought it was money or valuables or a diamond. He pried open my hand.
ust have been very disappointed, because they were just pictures of a family, of a mother and father and three children. He tore them up and threw the way.
To him, it meant nothing. To me, it would have meant an awful lot, because then if I had any pictures, I would have known what my mother and my father and brothers looked like, and I don’t.
When we came out of the showers, the freezing cold showers, and this woman dared to steal a black coat that somebody else had left there. We were shivering, because we were cold, we were scared, we were humiliated.She stole a black coat. She could have been killed for doing such a dastardly thing, but she kept the coat around the two of us.
The warmth of the coat and the body heat from the two of us, I think kept us alive.
Even though she didn’t give birth to me, she gave me life at that point. I was with this new woman I don’t know how long I was with her, because suddenly, she disappeared.
One day I was very sick with typhus, it was smelly, it was disgusting inside the barracks, and I found myself somehow or other sleeping or being outside.
I don’t know if I was by myself or if somebody took me. I was lying around with bodies, and something happened that day that never happened before.The soldiers came in, soldiers wearing different uniforms, soldiers acting very kind, soldiers who were throwing up. Nazi soldiers never threw up, but these were British soldiers.
They came in and they made an announcement in a strange language which must have been English, saying,
“You’re free. You’re free, ihr seid frei. You can do anything you want. We are the British Army.
We have brought you food, medical help, you’re free.”
What do I want to do? I don’t have a mother, I don’t have a father.
I can’t move. Typhus is the kind of sickness where you can’t see, and you can’t hear and have like vertigo.
Everything is flying. I was about nine years old at this point. Many people died, I did not. God meant for me to live.Before I was adopted in the United States, the adoption laws require that there’s nobody in the biological family that wants the child. Nobody wanted me because there was nobody left alive to look after me.
My adopted parents looked very hard, and found a woman in Sweden who knew my family.
She told them of what happened, not to look for them. But when I used to walk through the streets and if I would see somebody who looks familiar, I’d say:
Could that possibly be my father or my brothers?
I can’t imagine what my mother looked like at all. None of those people have turned out to be blood relatives.
I went through elementary school, I went through high school. They sent me to a public high school,ut I went out of the neighborhood because I had had Hebrew in this private school.So I was able to get ahead first because I was so behind as far as my age. And then I went on to Brooklyn College.
Very lucky, because I was popular. I always liked people.
I was able to make friends very easily, maybe that’s how I got so many mothers. Maybe they just needed me as much as I needed them.
People said that a woman lost a child, maybe she took me as her child. I don’t know the reasons, but I always had people around me who were good to me.
I was married March 15, 1959. In September of the following year, we had our first daughter.
Two years later we had another daughter, two years after that another daughter, and then a son.
When I speak to groups, and now I speak to many groups of different people.
I feel very strongly that what I end up with very much now is that we have to laugh as much as we can. We have to love as much as we can, and we have to make sure that Israel is safe and free.This is our country, and that anybody who needs a place to come back to, can have a place to be.
We have an important role. Survivors are dying out. So people who I speak to, I sort of find that I’m asking them to be our ambassadors, to speak and make sure that other people will be remembered.
I feel very strongly that anybody who wants to hear about the Holocaust, it is my obligation to tell them.
I always think of my mother on her last trip to Treblinka, when I ran out of the synagogue and she and David and Yossi went.
Rena Quint’s Holocaust memories…What was she thinking on that last trip? Did my mother think about what happened to her little girl?I hope she looks down from Heaven now to see that the little girl she left at the age of six became a wife, a mother, a grandmother, a great grandmother, and life has continued.
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Today is International Holocaust Remembrance Day 2023.In the spirit of sharing what we’ve been doing for 28 years now.Here’s a tribute to some friends who’s optimism, belief in people, and hope will stun you.This year my long time friend and artist Alan “Jake” Jacobs passed away. We worked together for 25 years, his photos inspiring generations of students.Also in memory of the many women who’s roles in saving people from the Holocaust. Their survival stories and role in keeping the history alive is often buried by male dominated history.Lise Borsom of the White Bus Rescue is one I’ve discovered this year. Someone who battled tyranny and risked her life not just during WWII, but in other essential activism.Her story below, because Holocaust history is her story…and many others.Holocaust Remembrance Day 2023 VideoRecognizing Holocaust Remembrance Day 2023 with a selection of people:Remember.org remembers friends of our community.
Holocaust Survivors, people who helped rescue others during the Holocaust, and the White Bus Rescue.
Auschwitz Concentration Camp Virtual Tour
Auschwitz/Birkenau Photographs by Alan Jacobs
Auschwitz poem by Professor G. Stendig-Lindberg
Visit the Lindbergh Peace Foundation and read their poetry.
Abe’s Story – A Holocaust Memoir | Abram Korn from Lipno, Poland
Red Cross White Bus Rescue – 10 Gifts
Lise Borsum – Gift #4 from Norway – Swedish Red Cross White Bus Rescue
Anita Kempler Lobel – Gift #1 from Krakow, Poland
Holocaust Remembrance Day 2023 is important in the face of rising anti-semitism today.Recently a friend shared confusion as to this Holocaust Remembrance Day 2023. Why is it such a big deal – it’s the day the Auschwitz camp was liberated.Listen to my friend Joey Korn share his father’s story of survival.Hear the story of possibility, of not treating people as enemies, and of thriving based on family, faith, and simply working to make things better.Looking around at anti-semitism rising, I shared with her that I’d love for Remember.org to not be relevant.In recent years even more people are trying to understand in a social media world.Where the words Holocaust and Hitler have been appropriated to validate anyone’s belief.When those words come up you know the conversation is lost.Then the events in Israel on Holocaust Remembrance Day 2023, when 7 were killed.I do wish the 2 state solution in Israel might come to pass (yes I’m a dreamer).Meanwhile Jewish centers of learning and synagogues have armed guards.Outside their doors through out the US, and in many places around the world.Remembering helps to understand things today. That understanding has to come not by using past events as an explanation or validation.Each is a unique event and in our hearts, lots of people hate.Part of why I do what I do is sharing stories of survival, rescue, and life.Because last I heard Hitler lost and the Jewish people survived and rose out of the Holocaust.If you could sit down with survivors and 2nd gen like I have, you’d find hope and inspiration, not history repeats itself blah blah blah.It is so important to remember, and for us all to take a step forward into love, into our hearts. Away from the fear anger and hatred that dominates the headlines, but to me doesn’t dominate people.Holocaust Remembrance Day 2023 is where we remember the Holocaust and keep vigilant to stop these types of events from happening today.The post Holocaust Remembrance Day 2023 appeared first on The Holocaust History - A People's and Survivor History - Remember.org.
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Doverstorp refugee camp was the temporary home for the largest number of Polish women in Sweden during this period.
Much of the material in this article comes from many interviews conducted in Doverstorp, as noted in Table 1 below.
< Part 3 – Lest We Forget – Doverstorp | Part 3 Final: Doverstorp Resettlement Camp >
Table 1
TESTIMONY RECORDS OF SOME OF THOSE CARED FOR IN DOVERSTORP REFUGEE CAMP (7)
| Name | Date | Record of Witness Testimony | Rescued from / date | | Zofia Tyszkiewicz | January 13, 1946 | 122 | Ravensbruck, April 25, 1945 | | Helena Zajkowska | January 29, 1946 | 173 | Ravensbruck, April 25, 1945 | | Danuta Ziembicka | January 28, 1946 | 169 | Ravensbruck, April 19, 1945 | | Gustawa Kapłan | January 12, 1946 | 102 | Malchow, April 28, 1945 | | Leokadja Orzechowska | January 12, 1946 | 105 | Ravensbruck, April 25, 1945 | | Stanisława Kowalewska | January 12, 1946 | 103 | Ravensbruck, April 1945 | | Stanisława Rejent | January 12, 1946 | 106 | Bergen-Belsen April 15, 1945 | | Zofia Leszczyńska | January 14, 1946 | 127 | Ravensbruck, April 25, 1945 | | Maria Szlendak | January 13, 1946 | 121 | Watenstedt, April 25, 1945 |
| Lida Holcer [Holzer] | January 13, 1946 | 113 | Camp near Hamburg to Sweden,April 29, 1945 | | Erna Solewicz | January 12, 1946 | 111 | Ravensbrück, approx. April 25, 1945 | | Rachela Gottfried | January 13, 1946 | 115 | Malchow, April 26, 1945. | | Anna Feberysiak | January 13, 1946 | 112 | Ravensbruck, April 25, 1945 | | Stanisława Czerwińska | January 12, 1946 | 96 | Ravensbruck, May 1, 1945 | | Aniela Łukasińska | January 31, 1946 | 175 | Eberswald, April 27, 1945. | | Helena Kamińska | January 14, 1946 | 125 | Ravensbruck, April 25, 1945 | | Barbara Wiśniewska | January 13, 1946 | 123 | Ravensbruck, April 25, 1945 | | Helena Parzych | January 13, 1946 | 118 | Ravensbruck, April 1945 | | Paulina Perzyńska | January 13, 1946 | 119 | Ravensbruck, April 25, 1945 | | Barbara Sadlik | January 29, 1946 | 171 | Ravensbruck, April 25, 1945 | | Marja Smagała | January 14, 1946 | 135 | Ravensbruck, April 1945 | | Stanisława Samborska | January 12, 1946 | 134 |
7 Compiled from data at Lund University Archives.
Preparing For Freedom on an Unknown JourneyWomen from Ravensbruck on route to the White Buses and freedomIt must have seemed surreal to these prisoners at the time.
They were being told that freedom was coming, yet they had witnessed Nazi lies and misinformation so often, who knew what to believe? Helena Zajkowska (Witness Testimony #173) recalled:
“There were Swedish ambulances parked at the railway stop, and that reassured us that we really were on our way to freedom.
We were badly ill with stomach problems during the journey and, being unable to leave the wagon, we were in appalling sanitary conditions.
We traveled like that for six days, arriving in Lübeck, then continuing on to Denmark, then by ship to Copenhagen, and from there to Sweden.
We were so tired, hungry, and dirty that getting clean clothes, washing, and ridding ourselves of lice were initially the only things we cared about.” The basics of life.”The transition from camps such as Ravensbrück to neighboring Sweden was not easy. According to one former prisoner and survivor of the tortuous camp,
Stanisława Kowalewska (8) (Testimony 103) was born in Warsaw in 1898, arrested in November 1942 and interrogated with torture so painful that she lost three teeth.
Still, the will to survive remained strong.
During her final days at Ravensbrück, she lay near death on the “stone floor near the toilets” thinking she would eventually die there.
The SS guards assumed she wouldn’t make it until the Swedish Red Cross arrived.
The very next day, Stanisława picked herself up after every fall because she knew or hoped there was a path to freedom. She ran towards the gate where the Swedish Red Cross was stationed.The SS guards deemed her too far gone, but the Swedes offered themselves to her when she reached out her hand and physically shouted that she was only “cold” while she “wept dreadfully.”
This is a depiction of how personal, dark, unnerving these personal experiences were to those trying to find a path to anything other than what they were currently facing.
Another reflection is (Witness Testimony #105) Leokadja Orzechowska’s memory:
“From the men’s camp, we went back to Ravensbrück, where we received food parcels from the Red Cross.
We were loaded aboard freight wagons without anyone saying where they were taking us.I thought I was bound for Poland; as it turned out, they were taking us to Sweden as free people.”8 Witness 103 Testimony: http://www.alvin-portal.org/alvin/attachment/document/alvin-record:101214/ATTACHMENT-0010.pdf
Wounded Ravensbrück refugees are cared for at Padborg on the Danish border. (9)9 https://www.newsweek.com/swedish-schindler-how-count-bernadotte-saved-thousands-jews-death-331778
Count Bernadotte RemembranceAdditionally, Aniela Łukasińska’s [Witness Testimony #175] recollection captures what so many experienced and felt:
“At Ravensbrück we received Red Cross parcels, yet since we didn’t have any bread, we fell ill after overeating food from the parcels.When I arrived in Sweden, I weighed thirty-seven kilograms.
I was in very poor health on the way there; I only regained consciousness in the Pullman coach [a type of relatively comfortable railway carriage].
Now I weigh fifty-three kilograms and I’m in perfect health.
I owe it all to God and the Swedish Red Cross, and wish His blessing on this country.”10
From the prisoners’ perspective, the rescue was very abrupt. One day torture, rationing, starvation and murder were taking place.The next, strangers arrived and the unknown became even more unclear.
While there was still great suffering and some of the SS deemed prisoners unsuitable for release, there were also survivors like Stanisława Czerwińska.
She remembers, even when she was “horribly ill”, a “train coming to a halt in Denmark”.
She recalls she felt “born again”, wondering if she “was still human” when there was a Danish priest that blessed them when they arrived tosafety.
Each of these recollections depicts a certain shock and disbelief of the survival that was close enough to the touch.
Moreover, these recollections also establish the degree of bravery, tenacity and pure heroism each of these prisoners, now freed, exemplify.
Journey Through Denmark to Malmo, SwedenThe White Bus journey through Germany crossed the border into safer territory near the Danish city of Padborg.
Women prisoners from Ravensbrück during a stop in Lübeck, Germany. (11)
10
11 Photo: Heinz Ahrens. Courtesy: Marzio Mari Ahrens. https://www.yadvashem.org/magazine- featured/white-bus.html volume 92.
Interior of an original White Bus (12)
White Bus journey: Concentration camp prisoners on their way to Sweden.
Photo: Johan Nilsson/TT Pressen’s image (13)
12 https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Vitabussar_b8dn421_3465.jpg
13 https://www.svt.se/opinion/article5037994.svt
The photographs above and below show former prisoners being treated on the buses and the new arrivals being met and cared for in Padborg.14 Arrested in 1941 at the age of 50, Helena Parzych recalls the details of this first encounter:
“The young Danish soldiers lifted us down from the wagons and asked us to arrange ourselves in threes. One of the women went mad with joy. A group of fifty women was counted out and led into a clean passenger carriage. At last, we understood that we were finally free. Gunshots and fire could still be heard and seen in the distance.
We were fed – we received hot milk – and in these wagons we rode to the coast. The local people and soldiers bade us fond farewells.
By ship, we sailed to Copenhagen, followed by another train ride, and a final voyage by ship to Malmö, where we arrived on 3 May.” (15)
White Bus in Copenhagen on way to Malmo, Sweden
14 https://www.newsweek.com/swedish-schindler-how-count-bernadotte-saved-thousands-jews-death-331778
15 www.alvin-portal.org/alvin/attachment/document/alvin-record:101275/ATTACHMENT-0020.pdf
Survivor being cared for on White Bus to freedom
Arrival in Malmo
Entering Sweden at MalmoDescribing her arrival reflects what the photograph above shows, Stanisława Czerwińska [Testimony #96], who was arrested on September 1, 1944 during the Warsaw Uprising, remembers
“The Swedes put me on a stretcher; wrapped me in sheepskin jackets they had taken off their own backs; gave me medicinal drops, tablets and a few rusks to eat; and took me away to the vehicle. I slept all the way to Denmark. There, I was going to be taken to hospital, but I wanted to travel with my comrades to Malmö.
In Sweden, I have been laid up in various hospitals and I am still unwell to this day, but I am glad to have got away from the Germans, and I am grateful to the Swedes that I am alive and that they have taken such great care of me.”16
16 www.alvin-portal.org/alvin/attachment/document/alvin-record:101180/ATTACHMENT-0007.pdf
Survivors with the White Bus Rescue Arrival in Malmo 17
17 https://www.newsweek.com/swedish-schindler-how-count-bernadotte-saved-thousands-jews-death-331778
18 File:German-prisoners-arrive-in-Sweden-1945-391852574417.jpg – Wikimedia Commons
Women from German concentration camps arrive in Malmö by train on May 1, 1945.19
19 Gullers Flyktingar – Category:1945 in Malmö – Wikimedia Commons
https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Category:1945_in_Malm%C3%B6#/media/File:Gullers_Flyktingar.jpg
This became the first screening point for the just-released prisoners who received food, new clothes, and initial medical treatment before continuing to Copenhagen for transfer to ships so they could land in the neutral or non-belligerent city of Malmo, Sweden.Danuta Ziembicka [Witness #169] remembers that moment well:
“We arrived in Sweden on May 1, greeted warmly in Malmö by the local population, Swedish Red Cross nurses, and a delegate from the Polish consulate.
At that point, we were finally able to believe that we really were free and in the care of good people.”
Once in the Malmo area, they were sent to over 20 quarantine facilities with about 500 beds on average so the logistics were indeed complex.
Approximately 300 Swedish, Norwegian and Danish staff helped these new arrivals as best they could, especially since some were themselves former prisoners during the war.The public health concerns were real since there was widespread tuberculosis, typhus, typhoid, diphtheria and many other diseases.
Since these people were under quarantine, the resettlement camps had barbed wire to keep locals out and the former prisoners in.
These fences could certainly trigger post-traumatic stress reactions.
To house these refugees, gymnasiums, schools, public buildings and even the Malmo Museum were converted into shelters and medical facilities.
Two survivors housed in the Malmo Museum, 1945
A White Bus on display at the Malmo Museum
Developing Doverstorp Refugee CampHow big was the task of accepting and caring for over 15,000 former prisoners who came on the White Buses and tens of thousands more who arrived on the White Boats?
Referring to leaders of the Third Reich, Count Folke Bernadotte, who organized the White Bus rescue, negotiated with Himmler and his top officials, bluntly stated
“My experience tells me that they were completely lacking in moral conceptions and human stature.”20Those who survived had lived through torture, neglect, disease, terror and conditions unheard of in human existence until that time. The task was almost beyond comprehension.
In a humanitarian effort of historic proportions, Swedish authorities established hundreds of resettlement camps; one was on the Mo farm on Lake Glanin in Doverstorp.
It would eventually house over 3,000 people.
Today the lake is known for its excellent fishing and as the main source of water for the city of Norrkoping. In 1945-46, it served a much more humanitarian function.
Imagine a camp with over 100 barracks, each housing about a dozen people (21) without water, electricity or sewage disposal? A stove provided heat but apparently was not for cooking.That was done in one of two dining buildings, each holding up to 250 people at a time. Twenty toilets hardly seem adequate for this many people, but they worked it out somehow!
The lake provided ample water for bathing and drinking; a sauna was also available for over 100 people per day.
The camp also included a canteen, an employment office, laundry and an office building.
The barracks had numbers and the streets and paths had names, all in an effort to create a community.
Maybe not heaven, but certainly a haven from which to recover, to heal and to move on. This was the experience for many of the 2,879 initial residents of the camp, mostly Estonian Swedes.20 Bernadotte, Folke. “Last Days of the Reich: The Diary of Count Folke Bernadotte.” London: Frontline Books, 1945, p.131.
21 The initial plans called for each barrack to hold 12 refugees and one cook; the kitchens were never built, thus the large dining halls.
Then, in May 1945, the newly-released prisoners saved by the White Bus convoys started to arrive.
To get an idea of the conditions afflicting many of these new arrivals, consider this paragraph from the May 5, 1945 edition of the local newspaper.
From the Kronobergaren describing the scene at the Vaxjo railway station about 100 miles from Doverstorp:
“Some of them even had to be carried on board the bus.
Several of them also wore bandages on various parts of the body and, generally, these pale and thin people gave a harrowing impression of the sufferings they had endured.Still, despite their exhaustion, their faces beamed with happiness at arriving in Sweden and finally being able to look forward to a time when they will receive proper care and humane treatment.”22
Group portrait of medical personnel in Sweden (23)
When the camp was a community of mostly Estonians before the passengers from the White Bus convoys arrived beginning on May 6, 1945, there were no barriers to entry and exit.
22 The Road To Freedom. https://kulturparkensmaland.se/wp-content/uploads/2022/03/The-road- to-freedom-text.pdf
23 Source: https://collections.ushmm.org/search/catalog/pa1164241
They were not necessary.But, as described above, there were realistic public health concerns which resulted in Doverstorp (24) (photo below) being surrounded by fences to keep the newly arrived within the resettlement camp and to keep outsiders out.24 Source: Flyktingförläggningen i Doverstorp – Rickul/Nuckö Hembygdsförening (rnhf.se)
Group portrait of Ravensbruck survivors recuperating in Sweden (25)
If the people in the portrait above look more well-nourished than those in the photographs taken upon arrival in Malmo, it is because they are.
The photographs below (26) give an idea of the food and the kitchens needed to provide thousands of meals per day in 1945-46.
25 Source: https://collections.ushmm.org/search/catalog/pa1164239
26 From Red Cross Archives at the Riksarkivet: Sweden’s National Archives. Photographs taken and used with permission, September 15, 2022.
Survivors wrote to family members and friends, sometimes optimistically about the future and on other occasions, delivering distressing news.Dated June 21, 1945, a Doverstorp resident sent the postcard below to someone in Palestine sharing the sad news that he is the only member of his family to survive. (27)
27 http://www.edwardvictor.com/Holocaust/Sweden.htm
Healthcare in Doverstorp Refugee CampLife in the camps included medical and dental care.
A formal note about how to continue the staffing of the dental clinic reveals the attention to detail designed to help these refugees adapt, get back to better health and hopefully move on.
For an interview with the National Library of Israel, “MR” recalls being
“liberated by the Swedish Red Cross from Malchow in trucks with no straw, with nurses, on April 26, 1945.”
With her two sisters, they traveled through Denmark on the way to Sweden where she was confined in a hospital in Lund.
Like so many others, MR was placed in quarantine in Doverstorp where she and her sisters remained for 3 years.28
After the war, she became a social worker; the trauma of her experiences meant she suffered from nightmares for decades and, as happens, did not share her Holocaust experiences with her daughter for more than 25 years.28 Kestenberg Archive | MR OHD interviewee (Kestenberg, Judith OHD (interviewer) | Kestenberg, Judith OHD (interviewer). The National Library of Israel (nli.org.il)
A typical paperwork form accompanying a refugee arriving at Doverstorp read:
“Packaging Note: The refugee Maria Gluszecka with identity number 189187 of Polish nationality with place of Berlin origin is hereby referred to Brody Refugee
Camp of Doverstorp and is expected to arriveon2716,19.45.JonkopingonJune 25, 1945”… with official signatures.
Perhaps the translation of ‘packaging’ was a bit harsh, but the administration required documentation at every point.
These records are available today in Sweden’s Lund University and the National Archives; they represent the personal side of history when reduced to forms.
Rescued by the Swedish Red Cross, when Itka Zygmuntowicz29 arrived in LundonApril28,1945,she was given new clothes, food and medicine.What could have been a rather joyous occasion, she cringed at the “horror” of seeing herself in a mirror for the first time since her capture and imprisonment in Auschwitz.
After a stay in a hospital in Lund, she was quarantined in Doverstorp where she recalls people coming to the fences to look in at the new arrivals,
“like being monkeys in a zoo.”
Itka was the first to sign up when a local rabbi organized a kosher camp for young Jewish adults under the age of 21.
Eventually in November 1945, she was allowed to leave the camp for a job which she cherished because it offered her privacy for the first time in years.30Itka met her husband, Rachmil Zygmuntowicz, while in Sweden and the couple with their two sons migrated to the United States in 1953, settling in Philadelphia, PA.
Sara K31 shared a similar journey to Doverstorp, starting from her arrival in Malmo where she received assistance from a Jewish youth organization, before being relocated to Doverstorp.
Her stay lasted only two months before moving to a kibbutz in Norrköping. She eventually settled in Israel, but only after being imprisoned by the British in Cypress for attempting to illegally sneak into Palestine.
One can only imagine the trauma of being basically imprisoned in another ‘camp,” even if it was operated by one of the allies.29 https://collections.ushmm.org/search/catalog/hvt4285858
30https://fortunoff.aviaryplatform.com/collections/5/collection_resources/2048/file/55651?u=t&keywords[]=doverstorp
31 https://collections.ushmm.org/search/catalog/hvt4918870
Anti-semitism and Doverstorp Refugee CampApproximately 40% of the residents of Doverstorp over time were Jewish. The camp administration and the survivors themselves made clear distinctions between Poles (who were mostly Catholic) and Jews.
Upon arrival in Sweden, each survivor was required to provide their name, gender, date of arrival, date of birth, place and country of birth, nationality and in most cases religion.
Eventually, these registration cards came to include the letter “J.”
Jews from Poland were classified as Jewish, not Poles or Polish Jews. Mordechay Giloh (32) has documented the reality that life in Doverstorp and other camps was far from idyllic.
This note reads
“Within the camp there is a Polish dentist, Maria Hanel, who has at her disposal an assistant named Halina Wald, who was previously transferred here from another camp.
As Hialina Wald will soon be leaving Doverstorp, it would be desirable that another assistant could be made available, and Maria Kanel has suggested Bronislawa Morgenstern, for the time being in the refugee center Gränevik in Diö. On the basis of the above, I can therefore respectfully state that the Commission wanted to transfer from Gränevik, Dio, here the Polish citizen Bronislawa Morgenstern, who is intended to serve as a dental hygienist.” (33)
The correspondence is signed by Sten Malmberg, Warehouse Chief.
32 Mordechay Giloh. “The split between Polish Jews and non-Jewish survivors from concentration camps Swedish society’s reactions in the spring and summer of 1945” Nordisk Judaistik/Scandinavian Jewish Studies. Vol 27, no.1, 24-42.
33 From Doverstorp files in the National Archives, Stockholm, Sweden. Used with permission granted on September 16, 2022.
Old prejudices and stereotypes, hatreds and beliefs remained even after the shared experiences in the Nazi concentration and death camps.
Even the camp’s director at that time Torsten Nordsjon (34) wrote about the anti-Semitism he witnessed and he was only in that position from May – September, 1945.34 Judaiska Minnen, 375:29
These observations reflected those of the well-known Swedish journalist Tora Nordstrom-Bonnier who was likewise shocked at the extent of the anti-Semitism in Doverstorp when she visited … even during the first few weeks post-arrival.
Alva Myrdal, a prominent Swedish sociologist and a 1982 recipient of the Nobel Peace Prize, inspected the camp on May 13, 1945, just one week after the first White Bus survivors arrived.
Four highlights of her May 27, 1945 report were that:1. the quality of the food needed This may have meant to also provide Kosher food as appropriate. 2. programs were needed to help these new arrivals prepare for life in Sweden if they stayed or concrete plans to become repatriated to their home countries. 3. anti-Semitism was very much alive and Many Polish refugees held strong anti-Semitic views and acted accordingly. 4. the proper authorities at the camp and in the government immediately develop programs to fight the toxic anti-Semitism she had seen and
This sad chapter of the resettlement camps is important for it shows the underlying tensions that lead to hatred, cruelty and for many a desire to find ways to Palestine, soon to become Israel just a few years later.
< Part 3 – Lest We Forget – Doverstorp | Part 3 Final: Doverstorp Resettlement Camp
White Bus Rescue – the 10 GiftsPart 1 – Gifts 1-5 | Part 2 – Gifts 6-10
The post Doverstorp Refugee Camp – Red Cross White Bus Rescue Part 3 appeared first on The Holocaust History - A People's and Survivor History - Remember.org.
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Here’s the complete story of a survivor of the Hungary Holocaust from the book, Childhood in Times of War by Andrew Salamon. His story of survival of his family and Budapest neighbors gives a personal insight to the events.
The following is from Chapter 4 of the book, the entire book is here:
Book Chapters
1. Before the War | 2. War in Europe
3. Darkening Skies | 4. The “Final Solution”
4. Part 2 “THE FINAL SOLUTION” | 5. Liberation & Beyond
6. Epilogue
Refugee Status in the Hungary HolocaustBy the late summer of 1944, Budapest was flooded with refugees arriving by the thousands from the war zone.
People fled by train, truck, horse cart or on foot, carrying minimal belongings, often without any papers. This gave me an idea: I could claim refugee status and obtain more valid documents.
The dreaded Red Army was rolling forward into Hungary and Nazi propaganda about the cruelty of the fast approaching enemy was in full force.
I carefully concocted a story about being a war orphan, from the town of Kolozsvar in Transylvania, a town occupied by the Russians.
The story included losing all my relatives as well as my papers and other belongings. All alone in the world.
Rounding out my story with the name of the street I had lived on, the names of my parents, brothers and sisters.My last name, Kocsis, a good old Hungarian peasant name, which was written into my cherished documents.Obtaining food coupons was now easy. I headed to the nearest refugee community kitchen, looking hungry and exhausted, and was given a bowl of soup and food coupons.
Then visiting a number of offices and received coupons for clothing, and a card that allowed me to sleep in a refugee shelter. I was assigned a small place in a hospice and the local police station issued a temporary residency card for that address.
These papers were of limited use as they were only valid for a certain amount of time.
But they provided temporary cover and gave me the self-confidence I needed to move around the city without fear of arrest.
The author Andrew Salamon and his older brother David.My New IdentityI went through a period of refining my story so that it would be sufficiently detailed and believable.
When going for a meal or a rest at one of the shelters and people asked me why a 12-year-old boy was living alone, I would tell them my sob story.
Someone would say: “Oh, I am also from Kolozsvar! Where did you live?““On Rakoczy Street,” I would respond, hesitantly.“Me too. What number?“I would mumble a number and some story about forgetting the details during the turbulence of the past few months. The stranger would nod and say that he lived on the other end of the street, near the Catholic church named Sainte Catherine.
The next time adding the Catholic church to my story. Or if someone asked about the Katona family who lived on the same street?
My answer was evasive, but the Katona family became our neighbours in my story from that point on.
When it came to my people, just had to start talking about how they had both perished at the cruel hands of the damned Bolsheviks. Shed a few tears and all questioning on the subject would cease.
I selected a fictitious school- the Petofi Street Gymnasium – and a few popular names for teachers. When someone pointed out to me that I must be wrong because there was no Gymnasium on Petofi Street?Maybe it was Arpadi Street, I would laugh out of embarrassment and admit my mistake. The next time, my school was situated on the correct street.My story was pretty solid by the time it was critical to have all the details worked out.
In the meantime, learning to live on my own, away from our yellow star home for several days at a time. It was more dangerous to go to and from our “mini ghetto” than to live on my own in the refugee shelters.
The few catechism lessons I had taken from a priest back in 1943 came in very handy now.
In the public shelter before we sat down to eat, we always recited a few prayers. The “Our Fathers” and “Hail Marys” came rolling off my tongue, as if saying them forever.
Also made the sign of the cross when walking by a church or reciting prayers. When a priest was present, we had to greet him humbly and genuflect in front of the crosses that hung on almost every wall of the shelter.
Another aspect of hiding my religious identity was more difficult and embarrassing. In washrooms, I had to hide my penis behind my hands if others were present.Similar difficulty taking showers at the shelters, as you could never count on being alone. Being discovered as circumcised was the surest, deadliest giveaway.
All in all, I kind of enjoyed my privileged status as a poor refugee child from the east. Never forgetting posing as someone else, but it made me laugh inside to see how easy it was to fool people and milk their sympathy.
“If only they knew…“, I sometimes thought, when selling my story to yet another person. Felt myself to be quite the little actor.
Reign of Terror in the Hungary HolocaustFerenc SzalasiOctober 15th, 1944 is a date that is forever etched in my memory.
On that day, the Hungarian Nazi Party took control of the country and unleashed a reign of terror:
The Nazi take-over was swift and complete. Within days, it seemed like all the residents of Budapest turned into ardent Nazis.
The day after the take-over, I headed home to our yellow star house to tell David, Mother and the others the tragic news.
About the atrocities I had witnessed in the city. At this time, the first air raid of the day was signaled.
The bombings started again with great force. Finally both Russian and American planes attacked the city, destroying entire city blocks and leaving roads and streetcar lines in ruins.
Hungary Holocaust – the Arrow CrossI found our yellow star house in shambles. The door had been broken down and the women were hysterical, sitting in a corner crying.
An Arrow Cross group had raided the house the day before. They had smashed everything, beaten up the women, stolen anything worth stealing, and threatened to come back.Five minutes after they left, Mother had taken her already packed bag and left for her planned hideaway. She moved to the relative safety of a fake orphanage, where there was no room for David and me.
Mother, David and I had decided earlier that moving to the ghetto would be a death sentence. We would die of starvation, disease or as a result of Nazi violence.
Or we would be deported to a concentration camp, and deportation also meant death. So David and I decided to go our separate ways and fend for ourselves.
As I made my usual tour around the food and shelter places, I discovered that every location was being guarded by Nazis.
Papers were closely scrutinized and people were dragged away when there was the slightest suspicion of false documents. One day while waiting in a lunch line, this happened not too far ahead of me.I wasn’t sure what to do since walking away was just as dangerous as staying in line. But fate decided for me: the Nazi inspector had to go to the toilet and I managed to receive my last lunch from that place in peace.
At the shelters, where there were also Nazis checking documents and questioning each one of us before letting us in, luck once again intervened.
Some people in the line called out to the Nazi guard, reassuring him that I was truly an innocent victim of the Bolsheviks. And he let me in.
How much longer could this luck of mine last?
A Young Nazi Is Born…a Hungary Holocaust storyI had heard stories about young Jews stealing uniforms and pretending to be Nazis, thinking:
‘This is a brilliant idea! Why can’t I do that?‘
Siimply steal the necessary clothing and a few documents.
It was surprisingly easy. There were many bodies on the sidewalks and in building doorways, as they were no longer collected off the streets.
Jews, people suspected of being Jewish, and soldiers who were caught hiding among the civilian population were all shot on the spot. Fortunately, with the cold weather, the corpses froze, preventing the spread of disease.So there was a constant supply of dead bodies with valuable documents, weapons, army and Nazi uniforms, shoes, boots, and so on.
As the air raid marshals no longer supervised the streets, I could, in relative safety, scout around for a corpse to strip of its belongings. It had to be done swiftly and adroitly.
I spotted the body of a young person about my size, lying under the ruins. Many of these poor soldiers were children who had been conscripted in the emergency rush of the past weeks.
I crawled up to him, took his leather jacket, boots, money, and documents. From another corpse, peeled off the Nazi armband and wide belt with a holster.From a third body, obtained a weapon and bullets.Now I was dressed and armed like a little Nazi. The clothes didn’t fit me perfectly, but the streets were full of urchins wandering around in oversized overcoats, with hats covering their eyes.
Budapest, in November, 1944, was no fashion show.
That first time I “robbed” a corpse, fighting the feeling that it was actually alive, that it would open its eyes, slap my hand, and say, “Don’t touch me!”
It was so strange to touch a dead body, but after doing it a few times, I got used to it.
Also took some getting used to being a member of the “select race,” the worst scum my beloved city had ever produced.
But with a little practice, I managed to shout the Nazi greeting just as loudly as anyone else, while stretching out my right arm:
“Hang in there, Brother! Long live Szálasi!“
Finding Food and Shelter in the Budapest Hungary HolocaustFrom the day I left the relative safety of the yellow star home, the days, weeks and months became one blurry period of sheer animal survival.
Wake up, under ruins or in the doorway of a house, and look for water to clean myself with. Then the daily walk began.
It was important to be on the move, and not stay in one place for too long. I would enter a church for a short “prayer.”Once in a while, a priest would come out and offer me some food – a piece of bread or ersatz sausage, or a hot drink. This was one source of breakfast, although unreliable.It was also dangerous, because the Nazi gangs regularly searched churches for Jews. And young fascists were supposed to be free of the superstition of religion.During or shortly after a bombing raid, I would climb through the blown out windows of an abandoned apartment.
Scavenge around for food. This had to be done fast, before the owners returned home from the shelter.
if they were still alive, that is. Sometimes I managed to put a small package together, which would last me a day, or even for a few days.
Come night time, I had to figure out where to sleep again.
The question was never: What am I going to do tomorrow?
Nazi “Party Houses”Strangely enough, one of the safer ways to spend a few hours was in the company of young Nazis. When I met a group of them on the street, they always wanted to know where you were from and where you were heading.After telling my sob story, they would invite me to their party houses, offering me food and sometimes shelter for the night. These party houses were set up all over the city, in abandoned homes, shelters and basements.
They were used to house the young Nazis, and store food, weapons, ammunition and robbed loot. Some of the larger houses also had cellars used for holding Jews and other “suspect” characters.
But mostly, these houses were places for young Nazis to hang out in between raids, a place where they could boast about their escapades and adventures.
Their stories were, without fail, about the atrocities they had committed against Jews. They would compete to see who could use the foulest language to describe their victims, and who had the most vicious stories to tell.Beatings, rapes, executions, every possible method of degradation was employed by these children and recounted in great detail.Boys between the ages of 12 and 15 raped and killed young Jewish girls and women. Then they bragged about their exploits!I couldn’t compete with their foul mouths, telling my tale about being a heroic refugee from the east, and recounting in detail the horrible way in which the Red soldiers behaved towards us good Christian Hungarians.
My delivery improved with each telling, the horror stories became more detailed, the atrocities worse. They declared in loud childish voices that they would defend Budapest and that the Russians would never be allowed to capture the city.
As an eyewitness, my stories had a ring of truth to them. I became popular.
For a few months, I ate, slept and hid wherever I could. Every day, the challenge to survive became harder and harder.
The temperature dropped below zero early on in the winter of 1944. Sleeping under rubble, I would try to cover myself with an old overcoat or a blanket, but was perpetually cold.And the little food I could find was never enough. Sometimes going for a day or two without anything to eat.
After a while, the hunger became less painful and the gut-wrenching stomach cramps eased. I would gnaw on a dry piece of bread, or on a piece of leather just to satisfy my craving to chew on something.
Graves of the Danube in the Hungary HolocaustIn those days, death lurked just around every corner, all the time. The Nazi killing squads swarmed the city unchecked.
One time, while forced to join one of these squads on one of their daily forays, I witnessed what I had only heard about before.
We were marching around, keeping close to the walls to avoid flying shrapnel and exploding shells. Ahead of us, we saw two figures disappear through a doorway.Suspicious, our leader rushed after them. There, behind the door, huddled in the corner, was an elderly Jewish couple.They couldn’t produce any papers and after being slapped a few times, the old man confessed that they had escaped from the ghetto.This time, there was no on-the-spot execution. The leader told us, grinning, that these victims would be “sent to have a swim.”We surrounded the couple and marched them to a nearby party house, which served as a collection centre for captured Jews and other “criminals.” The couple was literally kicked down the stairs, into the cellar.
The gang leader received praise from the local head man for his alertness. Then we were told that they would need people for the next morning’s “swim,” and that we should stay around for the night.
Luckily, I wasn’t carrying a firearm and had a good excuse for not participating in the “action.”
We were woken early the next morning and handed a cup of ersatz coffee. Some hot black water trying to pass as coffee.
Then the prisoners were ordered to climb up from the cellar. Out came an assortment of people, mostly elderly, some bleeding, limping and supporting each other.Although none wore yellow stars, they were likely all Jews. I stood away from the victims as much as I could.They were tied together with ropes in groups of three, and marched towards the Danube river. I stayed back at the party house.I found out later what happened, from the foul mouths of the returning heroes. This is the story my “kameraden” told upon their return…
On the way to the river, everyone was silent as they walked through the semi-dark, deserted city streets.
It took a long time in the cold winter morning to reach the river. They knew what was going to happen.
all of them, victims and murderers, just walked on, without a word.
Near the river, someone joined them, also carrying a rifle. It was a priest dressed in a black cassock. As they arrived at the quay of the Danube, the priest stepped aside. The younger Nazis were told to stand back and wait.
None of the victims were hit or abused any more.
These people were condemned to die at the hands of their captors and that fact seemed to dampen the usually crude behaviour of the gang.
The victims were quickly lined up along the edge of the river. The ropes were checked and tightened.
(It was at this point in the story that I realized what the ropes were for.in case some of the victims were not killed by the bullets, they would be pulled into the river with the others and drown anyway.)Next, the older Nazis walked away from the group, and away from the river.
They lifted their guns and began shooting. No orders were given.
it was just a slow, almost lazy process of execution.
The bodies jerked as they were hit, then fell backward under the impact of the bullets into the river.
The executioners could hear the heavy thump of the bodies as they hit the ice.
It lasted perhaps one minute. The last body disappeared over the edge of the quay.
the last rifle was lowered.
the shooting stopped abruptly, and a deadly silence descended over the river’s edge.
At that moment, the man in the black cassock, Father Kun, stepped forward.
Raising the large wooden cross that hung around his neck, he began to pray. Some of the Nazis in the group knelt down to receive absolution from this representative of the Catholic Church.
Never found out who the victims were. Finding myself on the other side caused me tremendous grief and a deep sense of shame.
I had been afraid to look at the victims, remorseful for witnessing their humiliation and for being so powerless to do anything.
Stop the murders, or at least alleviate their suffering. Been afraid to look at my Nazi “brothers,” worried that my burning cheeks might give me away.
After the shooting, the killers walked to the edge of the Danube and looked down.
The ice was littered with the dead bodies. still bound together. None of them moved.
The ice was slowly floating downstream.
after a minute or two, the bodies started sinking into the water that opened up between big ice floes. A couple of minutes later, the victims had completely disappeared. One of the ice blocks, still stained with the blood of some of the murdered, got caught in an ice jam. the red blotches of blood remained visible from the distance. The rising sun was already washing over the hills across the river.
Some of the murderers went up to Father Kun and kissed the cross hanging from his neck.
The Church instantly absolved them of the crimes they had just committed.
When one of them recounted this episode, deep inside, I hoped that our society would not absolve them and that they would meet justice one day.
In the meantime, pretending they were my “brothers” and joining in in the merriment, which now broke out unfettered. It was time to celebrate a job well done.
These murderers were used to all this, as this was a routine visit to the Danube. One of them casually remarked that they had just wiped a few more vermin off the face of the earth.That’s all, just a few vermin!CaughtIt was December, around the middle of the month. The streets had become increasingly unsafe.
The bombing attacks continued unabated and flying bricks and shrapnel made any movement on the streets extremely dangerous. Dead bodies lay frozen on the pavement.
Piles of rubble became mountains, at the foot of walls which were teetering, ready to collapse with the next explosion.
It was a bad day for me: finding neither food nor warm shelter for the night. Darkness fell early on the city, which lay dead under the snow and darkening skies.Decided to go to sleep early, not looking too carefully for a good shelter. Cold and exhausted, I just wanted to lie down, cover up with something warm and sleep through the night.I climbed under a pile of rubble, somewhat protected by pieces of lumber. Dragging with me old rags that I had removed from one of the bodies.
My boots were wet so wrapped my feet with other bits of rag and stretched out.
The next thing I knew, waking up to somebody kicking my feet to see whether I was dead or alive. It turned out that I stuck my feet out a little too far.
An angry voice shouted: “Get out of there immediately!” I crawled out and tried to stand up.Immediately knocked to the ground by a powerful slap on the face, which brought me to the feet of young Nazi thugs who were brandishing rifles and looking at me with contempt.Instantly understood my predicament: here dressed up like one of them, yet sleeping under rubble, as if hiding. I had some explaining to do.
Started mumbling my explanation to the Nazi “brothers.” The leader demanded to see my documents.
I pulled out my bundle from my jacket pocket and handed them over. They were genuine, but quite an assortment of papers stolen from different sources.
After scanning them, he demanded angrily: “If these documents are real, why are you sleeping on the street, like one of the Jewish dogs or escaping soldiers?
I started with my refugee routine, but this time it didn’t work. Caught off guard, losing my confidence and stammering something incomprehensible.The truth was that I could think of no reason why a uniformed Nazi would sleep among the ruins, in the cold open air rather than entering a party house for the night.“Pull down your pants!” one of them ordered. I refused, claiming that it was too cold. They grabbed my arms and one of them pulled down my pants and shorts.
Seeing my circumcised penis, they started to beat me up with their gun butts and fists. Then they ordered me to stand up and pull up my pants.
With shaking hands, I obeyed. The game was clearly up. I had fallen into enemy hands.
They demanded to know how I had obtained the uniforms and the documents.“They’re false,” said the leader “and we will beat out of you the names of the people who supplied them.”With this threat, they ripped off my armband, knocked the Nazi cap off my head. Took off my belt and used it to tie my hands behind my back.
They ordered me to remove my boots, which were instantly scooped up by one of them. Then with a few kicks and blows from their rifle butts, they marched me away, barefoot and shivering.
The party house we went to was one of the larger ones. The leader of the group that had captured me reported me to his leader and I was shoved in a room.
They sat me on a chair and tied me up, my hands behind the back of the chair. A few older men entered and started interrogating me about the origin of the documents, which they waved in my face.
One of them pushed his face against mine. His spittle showered my face as he spoke:
“Dirty Jewish swine, your pocket is full of false documents. From whom did you get them?““No Sir, they are not false,” answering with exaggerated politeness totally wasted on the brute.“I took them from dead peoples’ pockets.”
This triggered a violent series of slaps by a second man, while the first one continued to scream:
“We know you got them from the Zionists! These are fake and you will tell us who gave them to you.
Names! Give me the names of the document falsifiers!
Where are they hiding out?“
I was slapped and interrogated for quite a while. Each blow to my face felt like an electric shock.
My head twisted from side to side, the shocks shook my skull and made my ears ring. They knocked the chair over, with my battered body tied to it, then set it up again and continued the interrogation.At one point, I lost consciousness and came to as they poured ice cold water over my head. More slaps. I kept mumbling that I was innocent, but no one was listening anymore.
It is impossible to say how long the beating lasted. It could have been only minutes, or it could have been half an hour. But it seemed like forever, as if the blows would never stop.
At some point during the beating, I stopped mumbling my explanations and began a monologue inside my head.
‘If I survive this,‘ I told myself, ‘nobody will ever again be allowed to touch me or to hit me. No one will ever slap my face again. If I live…‘Somehow, this inner conversation helped me survive the beating.
They eventually stopped slapping me and left me alone in the room, still tied to the chair. My head cleared up gradually, the urge to vomit went away and my hearing slowly returned.
I had suffered no serious injury. However, the rope was tight, and my arms and legs were numb.
I started to feel extreme discomfort and prayed that somebody would remove the ropes from my wrists.
One of the thugs entered, untied me, pulled me up by my hair, and pushed me toward the door. We went outside and he opened another door that led to the cellar below.With a shove and a kick, I was sent rolling down the stairs into the cellar. With my numb arms, I tried to protect my head from further damage.My body landed on the damp and smelly cellar floor, where I lay for a while, then slowly stood up.Brush With Death in the Hungary HolocaustI wasn’t alone. A group of shadowy figures, who had been captured earlier, huddled around the walls.
They didn’t react to my unceremonious arrival. Nobody stood up to lend me a helping hand, no one greeted me.
They just stared in front of them, blind and deaf to their surroundings.
For a long time the silence continued. My senses slowly recovered. I touched my swollen face and felt a burning pain.“If I live, no one will slap me again,” I mumbled into the silence, feeling feverish, weak, and faint.I looked around the dark cellar to see who my fellow captives were. Altogether we were about a dozen people, standing around listlessly, almost lifelessly.
There were a few old, religious Jews, one of them mumbling prayers into his beard. There were a few younger men, possibly soldiers on AWOL.
One of them had blood all over his face and swollen eyes from the beating he had received. Two old women were weeping silently. I realized that I had become a victim of the next death squad.
My hours were numbered, my destiny sealed.
Some of the people started to whisper, discussing what would happen next. They had been captured a day or two earlier and had been kept in the damp, cold cellar, without any food or water.Weak from thirst, hunger and cold, they were already like living dead. They guessed that we would all be deported. Marched on foot towards the west, perhaps forced to enter the ghetto.But I knew what was awaiting us.Jews collected from the protected buildings or the yellow star buildings were taken to the ghetto. But another fate awaited escaping soldiers and those of us who had been hiding out as non-Jews.
Should I tell these people how hopeless our situation was? How, come dawn, we would be ordered outside, marched to the river and shot into the icy waters?
I decided to tell them the truth. Most of them didn’t listen, but just continued to pray or stare into space.
Some of the younger ones said that I was crazy, that those killings were only rumours.
Fell silent and retreated into myself. So did the others. Silently, we lay on the cold, dirty floor.
Strangely, I almost felt relieved. It was all over now: no more hiding, no more hunger and cold, no more role-playing. Tired of the daily struggle. Now captured and that was that.This was the end. It had all lasted far too long and had become too hopeless as our liberation seemed more and more distant.We were surrounded by the Nazi hordes who ran the city and everyone in it. It was hopeless to believe that any of us stood a chance of surviving.
I thought: ‘There should be a God watching over me. But he’s certainly not here.’
What kind of God could I turn to from inside this dark cellar, among people who were condemned to die?
To the God of my father, once my God too, who had abandoned us all? There was no use in praying.
Knowing about the execution routine gave me a feeling of finality. I had no tears to shed, no one to say final goodbyes to. Thought of my family and hoped that they would all survive.
They would cry over me when they realized I wasn’t coming back. My body would disappear under the floating ice as if it had never lived, never existed. That was that.Sometime late that night, fell asleep. In the morning, we heard the door burst open and heavy boots coming down the stairs.
It happened exactly as I had imagined. It was still dark when we were marched outside to the street.
The young Arrow Cross members were dressed, shouldering their rifles. We were tied together in twos and ordered to start marching.
I had a feeling that this was not happening to me, that I was watching a film seen a long time ago. As if outside my body, a silent observer of a strange ritual.
It was a repeat performance of the execution scene that had been described. The streets were empty, shrouded in the darkness of early winter morning.
No light escaped from behind the shuttered windows as we made our way silently, in almost total darkness.
There was a lull in the bombing and shelling and the only sound was the echo of marching Nazi boots.My good boots were gone now and was limping with my wet, frozen feet, wrapped in the rags worn inside my boots.But the cold didn’t bother me. I felt nothing.
We were marching towards our death and wanted to live my last minutes on this earth at peace with myself, without being bothered by small inconveniences.
I felt something deeply spiritual, a warm closeness to the man whose hand I was tied to, and to the other captives. We were fellows in suffering and in death.
Then, a miracle happened. Suddenly, we saw a group of Nazis and soldiers marching towards us.
Leading them was a tall, well-fed SS man who was heavily armed and imposing-looking in his clean uniform. In fluent German, he started yelling at the leader of our group.
The Hungarian Nazis didn’t understand German, so one of the soldiers from the other group translated.The leader of our group explained that they were taking a bunch of Jews and other scum to the Danube to be executed.Hearing that, the man behind me let out a muffled cry.There ensued a sharp exchange of words. The SS man called the Hungarians a bunch of idiots for wasting bullets instead of preparing to defend the city against the Russian onslaught.
Our Nazi responded that they were doing what they did almost every day. Eliminating the traitors before the final battle.
But the SS man and his comrades slowly gained the upper hand.
One of them grabbed the beard of one of the older Jews and began pulling him away. Another delivered a few hard blows to two of the captives.
Ordered them to move over to where they stood. The SS man said with a grin:
“We know how to handle this scum without wasting a single bullet. Leave them to us and return to your place.”With that, they began marching us in the direction they had come from.
The Hungarian Nazis marched away. We didn’t utter a word.
The SS man and his cohorts looked even more frightening than the other Nazis. I couldn’t even guess what would happen to us now.
We stumbled along, receiving an occasional blow on the back to speed up our march. Eventually we found ourselves in an empty lot where all the houses had been bombed.
The SS man stopped, turned towards us and said in fluent Hungarian:
“You are saved. We are not fascists, we are rescuers. At the end of this lot there’s a passageway to another street. Move fast and disappear before the Nazis return or the shelling begins.”They quickly pulled out knives, cut our ropes with a few swift movements, and began moving away.
Zionist Rescue GroupOur group reacted to this amazing announcement like robots in a daze. Most of the captives, immediately, unquestioningly, started walking away as fast as they could.
There was no time to feel relieved, express our thanks or celebrate. No time to shake hands or exchange words of encouragement with the others.
We had to keep moving, to clear out of the area fast and find new hiding places.
I was stunned. We had been saved by one of the Zionist rescue groups
But there was no time to contemplate the fantastic turn of events. Saved or not, I was now in a desperate situation.
My cover had been blown and my documents were all gone. Nowhere to go, nowhere to hide.
Telling the “SS man” about my predicament in a few words, that I wanted to join their group.He looked at me for a moment and said:“You can come with us and we can help you, but we can’t offer you permanent shelter.”With that, they tied me up again and marched on, with me, a captured Jew, in the middle.
Now alive again and filled with new hope. We went to a safe house, that was under international protection, in the heart of the city, called the Glass House.
It was completely full and couldn’t shelter another person without endangering the safety of the others. The Zionists paraded in full nazi uniforms and pretended to guard the house.
Inside the building, confusion reigned. It was packed with people of all ages, waiting for washrooms and food.
I was sent to have something to eat and to lay down to rest. They provided me with new false documents, clothing, food and shelter for the day, along with a pair of shoes to protect my cold bare feet.Later that evening, invited to join one of the groups that left to scout the city for news.When we reached a quiet, safe corner, I was told to beat it. Once again, I was on my own.It was confirmed later that my rescuers, the group that saved my life, was Hanoar Hazioni, one of the famed Zionist groups that masqueraded in uniforms and intimidated real Nazis.
They were very well organized, equipped with uniforms, weapons and false identification papers. They were also connected to other similar groups through a messenger service.
Young men who risked their lives, commuting between buildings, carrying documents and news from one group to another.
I later met the members of this liberal Zionist organization, when becoming a member after the war.
Survivors of the Hungarian HolocaustThat night I resumed my life of wandering and hiding, but didn’t feel lonely any more.
Now I knew that there was still Jewish life in the city, that there were resistance fighters and survivors. Determined to survive and live to see the arrival of our liberators.
My mother, my father, David and I were all still alive, thanks to individual miracles. Let me briefly recount each one of these.Mother was hiding in the lumberyard cum orphanage, where I visited her a couple of times. David and a Polish boy also snuck in once in a while.The place had enough basic food supplies to last for a few weeks, if necessary. Each time I left feeling reassured that at least Mother was safe. If only she could have felt the same way about me…David had also survived these rotten months. Since escaping from his labour unit, like me, he had been hiding out in Budapest.
However, late in December 1944, we decided that the city had become too dangerous a place to live.
We both joined Mother and stayed with her till the end.
Death MarchIn late November, the great retreat from Budapest towards the west had begun.
Leading Nazis and their families fled in cars and trucks loaded with loot stolen from Jews. Racing for time against the encircling forces of the Red Army.
Escaping Nazis also herded Jewish labour units towards the Austrian border. Thus, the infamous Death March began.Thousands of Jewish men without food, water or adequate winter clothing, were forced to march on the Budapest-Vienna highway. They slept on the side of the road, and ate the odd potato or root dug out of the frozen earth with their bare hands.Each day, hundreds dropped dead from exhaustion, or were shot by the soldiers guarding them. This was indeed a death march, without any purpose or destination.
The mad Hungarian Nazis could no longer exterminate the remaining Jews all at once, so they sentenced them to slow death.
It was from these columns of doomed that the Swedish envoy Raoul Wallenberg rescued people. Wallenberg was a businessman who was sent to Budapest to help the Jewish population however he could.
He personally rescued thousands of people, never stopping, never giving up, right up to the last days of the war.
Father Saved by Wallenberg (and many others during the Hungary Holocaust)The Swiss Embassy which helped rescue many during the end of the Hungary Holocaust.In late October of 1944, Mother heard by word of mouth that Father was alive.
His forced labour unit, stationed on the eastern front, was on a Death March, slowly moving back towards the city, and then on to Austria.
She also managed to find out from a visiting soldier what Father’s unit number was and the names of a few other men in his unit.
Mother, the lioness, was not going to give up on her man at this late point in the war. She visited the Swedish building housing Wallenberg.Gave them Father’s unit number, the names of other men in the unit, and their approximate location.Precisely the information Wallenberg needed to do his work.They prepared letters of protection and then raced after the targeted group by car.
Upon reaching the marching unit, wherever they were, Wallenberg would jump out of his car. In impeccable German, order the Hungarian Nazis to stop the march.
Raoul Wallenberg who organized rescues.He would whip out his documents and call out the names. As the men stepped out, he handed each one his document and ordered them into the car.
Before the Nazis realized what was happening, his car was already speeding back to Budapest with the rescued Jews in it.
That is how Father was saved.
Wallenberg brought Father back to the Swedish house in Budapest, from where Mother picked him up and brought him to her hiding place.How my father, a slightly built, not very strong man survived years of mistreatment, hunger, cold and physical exertion, I cannot tell.
I never had a chance to question him about those days and now it is too late. But survive he did.
Swiss Vice Consul Carl Lutz – In 1941 about 742,800 Jews lived in Hungary. In Budapest, some 124,000 survived the war. Between 15 May and 9 July, 437,402 people died in Auschwitz. Carl Lutz helped 62,000 Jews to surviveWoman of ValorMother of Andrew SalamonThanks to Mother, all four of us survived the war. She hid David when he escaped.
She rescued Father from certain death. She encouraged me to keep on living.
And she organized what became the hiding place for all four of us.
During the last weeks of the siege, we all ended up in the lumberyard, her choice of a safe place proving to have been the best one.
If the expression Eshet Chayil, meaning “woman of valor,” should be applied to anyone, my mother deserves it many times over.My Last Hiding Place in the Hungary HolocaustThe remote location of the lumberyard offered a relatively safe hiding place.
The family of one of the owner’s employees smuggled in food supplies.
Thanks to the organizational abilities of Mother and other women, supplies were rationed out frugally so that they lasted throughout the siege.
By December, two or three dozen people were living in the yard. Including individuals and families of all ages.
There were work sheds in the yard, containing woodworking machinery and a larger warehouse that was connected to the office building.
Andrew Salamon’s last hiding place in the lumberyard.Under each machine in the work sheds was a large cement-lined pit with a concrete lid where the sawdust was collected.This is where we hid. Each family was assigned its own shed and pit.When the siege of Budapest started around mid-December, emergency measures were implemented. During the day, everyone stayed in their pits until dark.
There was no food, no access to toilets, no room to walk or even stand up straight.
The pits were just large enough for three or four people to sit or crouch in.
After eight to ten hours in these cramped spaces, we would cautiously climb out.
Then we’d gather in the warehouse or the converted office space, which was the designated night time living area.
The many shelves in the warehouse that used to hold large sheets of plywood and lumber now served as bunk beds. The small kitchen was used for primitive cooking.Boiling water, cooking weak pea soups, dried peas and vegetarian stews were our meals. On lucky days, a piece of horse meat was added to this stew to provide some variety.
Electricity and water supplies were cut off by that time. But there was plenty of sawdust available for burning in the cooking stove.
Water was melted from snow and ice. Considering the primitive conditions, our basic survival needs were met quite well.
The conditions were extremely unsanitary. Washing and keeping clean were practically impossible tasks.
There was a humiliating head lice inspection every week, which involved pouring kerosene on the heads of those who were infested. The toilets often got blocked and backed up due to the cold and the lack of running water.This was the source of constant bickering, as was food distribution.
But under the circumstances, it was surprising that the arguments weren’t sharper. We all managed to get through those months together.
When David and I arrived in mid-December and shared our parents’ pit with them, the space became even tighter. But we were hopeful that our liberators would arrive in a matter of days.
We were in one of the eastern most suburbs of the city and the Russian armies were only a few kilometres from us. But the front moved very slowly.
It took almost another month for the front line to reach our area. That was a very long month.Tales From the Hiding PlaceAmong the families hiding was a Polish mother and son. After the father of the family had been murdered by the Germans in the Polish ghetto, they escaped into Hungary, surviving like animals in the forests.
In Budapest, they were caught by the Nazis who took them to the Danube, to shoot them into the river.
On the way to their execution, knowing what was about to happen, the boy told his mother to fall backwards into the river as soon as the shooting began.
Luckily for them they were standing at the end of the line. Together they fell into the river, pretending to be dead.The son floated on top of an ice floe, dragging his mother through the freezing water until they were out of sight from the Nazis.They climbed out of the water and hid until nightfall, then retraced their way to the city where they found a group of Jews who helped them.The boy was a member of the Betar Zionist movement in Poland. The Hungarian Betarniks had provided help, as well as the German parachutist uniform he wore when making a sortie outside to find food.
During the long evenings together he told us many stirring and eye-opening stories about Jewish pride. About the need to fight back and the desire to go to Palestine after liberation.
David and I absorbed every word and, not surprisingly, it was Betar that both of us joined as soon as we could in 1945.
Immediately after liberation, the Polish mother and son joined their Zionist brethren and left for Palestine.
Food FantasiesA favourite game, which we younger children played, was called “imaginary banquet.”
One player would recall a memorable meal he or she had eaten and describe it to us.
Using the greatest possible detail for each of the various courses, from appetizer and soup through to the main dish and, most importantly, the dessert and fruit.The game called for maximum exaggeration in recalling appearance, smell and flavour.
Occasionally, an argument would erupt over the relative merit of one kind of caviar over another, or the best wine to serve with a certain dish.
There was great competition to make the group swoon at the mere mention of delicacies we hadn’t seen for years and which we might never live to enjoy again.
The mention of chocolate, linzer or dobos tortes elicited the strongest reaction from the small band of starving dreamers.
We would fantasize when the war is over. What quantities of palacsinta we will devour, how many slices of watermelon we will eat…when the war is over.Mother Near DeathEven though we walked around the yard very carefully at night, a sliver of light or a faint sound must have escaped to the outside from time to time.
Twice in late December, this nearly brought disaster upon us. One time, a guard from the neighbouring factory led groups of Nazis and policemen into the lumberyard, claiming that someone was hiding in the area.
A few of the older people were discovered and were at once taken to the ghetto, from where they managed to escape after a fortnight and return to us.
The other time, the searchers seemed more certain than ever that people were hiding in the yard. But lifting up the concrete lids covering our hiding places never occurred to them, or perhaps they were too cold and lazy to make the effort.As they marched around the yard and inside the sheds for a long time, their heavy boots thumping on the floor above our heads, Mother had a hernia attack.
Suddenly, she clutched her side and turned deadly pale. We could see the bundle of hernia bulging out from under her dress.
We carefully made as much room for her as we could, so she could lie down ever so slowly.
She was pale, biting her lips in pain, as tears rolled down her cheeks. One moan and we would have been doomed.
As the Nazi searchers walked just above us, we sat still, not daring to even breathe, separated from our pursuers by only a thin cement slab. Mother twisted in agony on the floor while the searchers walked around above us, for what seemed like an eternity.We felt terribly helpless. We couldn’t even move to hold her hand, to wipe the perspiration off her forehead, or massage her hernia.
All we could do was huddle as close together as possible to make room for her. Mother’s breathing became erratic and she mercifully passed out from the pain.
Then we heard a command above us, and the boots marched away. We didn’t dare move, in case they were pulling their trick of marching away while one of them stayed behind in stealth to see if there was any sound or movement.
Those of us who had survived this far knew about these games. We remained still and silent for a long time.
Then Mother gradually came to and began the painful exercise of pushing her hernia back in place. We began to move around.
One of us handed her some water, and somebody else loosened her dress and wiped her forehead.
By nightfall, Mother was able to slowly get up and crawl out of the pit. This was probably the closest call we had during our underground period.
I don’t know if anyone else would have managed to suffer the pain in silence, determined not to give in and not to fail us. Once again, our mother’s determination and bravery saved our lives.
Red Army: The official name of the army of the Soviet Union during World War II.
Szálasi, Ferenc (1897-1946):
The leader of the Hungarian fascist Arrow Cross party. On October 15th, 1944, he replaced Horthy as head of state with the help of the Germans.
Szálasi’s brutal and murderous regime lasted until the end of the war.
When the war ended, he was captured by the Americans and extradited to Hungary. Found guilty of war crimes and crimes against the people, he was executed on March 12, 1946.SS: Originally, the SS acted as Hitler’s bodyguards. As the organization grew, it became the Third Reich’s principal instrument of terror, and the body responsible for murdering the Jews of Europe.
Zionism/Zionists: Zionism is an international movement, originally for the establishment of a Jewish homeland in Palestine, and later for the support of modern Israel.
A Zionist is an advocate or supporter of Zionism.
In the 1930s, there were several small Zionist youth movements in Hungary. These grew when Hungary reoccupied the territories it had lost after the World War I.
They grew further after each wave of anti-semitic laws, and when Jewish refugees arrived after 1942.
These youth movements played an important role in the Hungarian resistance, creating false identification papers, getting news out about what was happening in nazi-occupied countries, rescuing Jews, smuggling refugees across the border to Romania, and setting up homes to protect thousands of Jewish children and adults.death marches: Forced marches of prisoners under heavy guard to evade the advancing Red Army.
Jewish prisoners were marched deeper into Nazi-held territory, often with no clear destination in mind.
Many prisoners died of disease, mistreatment or exhaustion, and were simply left where they fell.
Wallenberg, Raoul (1912-1947):
A Swedish diplomat who led a rescue operation that saved the lives of approximately 100 000 Jews in Hungary. He is one of the great heroes of World War II.
Appointed first secretary of the Royal Swedish Legation in Budapest in June 1944, Wallenberg’s mission was to rescue Jews from Nazi persecution.
With the help of several hundred Jewish co-workers, he issued thousands of Swedish passes to protect Jews from the Germans and Hungarians.He erected approximately 30 “Swedish houses” in Budapest which were declared Swedish territory, providing shelters where Jews could seek refuge.Before long, the population in these houses reached 15 000. Wallenberg’s initiatives influenced other legations in Budapest to offer similar protections.Raoul Wallenberg also rescued hundreds of Jews from Eichmann’s death marches.He saved approximately 100,000 Jews in Budapest’s two ghettos from a joint SS/Arrow Cross plan to blow them up right before the city was liberated.
After liberation, Wallenberg was summoned by the Soviets -who were very suspicious of the Swedish mission -to army headquarters in Debrecen.
On January 17th, 1945, he was escorted back to Budapest by two Soviet soldiers, and was overheard saying that he didn’t know whether he was their guest or prisoner. That same day, he disappeared.
In 1956, the Soviets informed Sweden that they had discovered a report saying Wallenberg died in a Soviet prison in 1947.
Book Chapters
1. Before the War | 2. War in Europe
3. Darkening Skies | 4. The “Final Solution”
4. Part 2 “THE FINAL SOLUTION” | 5. Liberation & Beyond
6. Epilogue
Related Posts
House of Terror Museum Visit in Budapest, Hungary | Nazi and Soviet Headquarters
The post Hungary Holocaust – Chap 4 Part 2. The “Final Solution” appeared first on The Holocaust History - A People's and Survivor History - Remember.org.
Remember.org
This Auschwitz poem is by my Mother, Professor G. Stendig-lindberg, who went through hellish conditions in WWII; from Krakow Ghetto to labor and concentration camp Plaszow, to Auschwitz, and then to Bergen Belsen.
During her imprisonment in the concentration camps, she wrote poetry, and my grandmother Felicia taught her Mathematics and English to make her focus on productive things and keep an agile mind.
The poetry became a way for my Mother to endure the horrible conditions, and to share the emotional suffering, into words of expression.
Stendig-Lindberg-Infeld-Kahane: The Family StoryAUSCHWITZAsh-red the burning sky
the cannons of chimneys
spit out souls
Here come you who want to warm
your hands in the hell of fire
partake in crime made legal
beyond all record
of man’s violence
Here come you, abjectly cowed
able to turn a deaf ear
to the cry – the children’s cry
in this low building
where murder is industry
A civilized people
outdo the Genghis Khan
outrank the hordes of Huns
thus seal their doom
Put a white sheet of silence
over the low building
hang a veil over the burning sky
hush the cry of terror
Cut out this unbelievable
from the heart of memory
too much for human eye or ear
too much for human soul to bear
Earth never knew such crime
Free us from a witness’s burden
Such sorrow is God’s to bewail
I saw Him cry.
Sweden, 1956
© Prof. Gustawa Stendig-Lindberg
Along with the Auschwitz poem here is another poem, Life, by her daughter, Miriam.Life – a poem by Miriam Lindbergh, daughter of Prof. Gustawa Stendig-LindbergAnd one more poem by Prof. Gustawa Stendig-LindbergREQUIEM TO MY MOTHERDEDICATION: TO MY MENTOR AND MAINSTAY*
I seek you in the shadowed valley of pain
the sockets of my sorrow hollowed eyes
telescoped through the thicket
of the dark, where tears guard silence;
spiky stalactites of salt solidified,
in prismic facets of the void
which took you to its own
dissolved the contour and the form
I knew by love.
Maybe you found peace there
and I disturb you and alarm,
selfish with the longing of a child
call you, see you as you were, stately,
young, copper-haired, your hands so white –
that in relief, the blue of veins
like trees on silk – warm, smooth,
remembered on my cheek.
No hand, as yours, could soothe in terror’s hour.
Pining for its touch on my burning head
I clutch the pillar of your wisdom.
And it stays.
© Prof. Gustawa Stendig-Lindberg
Co -Vision Holocaust Remembrance Day Event – April 20, 2020Presenters and LinksEva Ariela Lindberg and Lea Saslav, Co-Hosts
Engineering: Jonathan Font Moxo
Video poster is the official Co-Visioning logo which is an original artwork by Eva Ariela Lindberg
Opening remarks: Eva Ariela, Lindberg Peace Foundation ~ www.lindbergpeacefoundation.org
Prof. Stendig-Lindberg’s Holocaust Poems
www.profmagnesium.org
Music by Yale Strom, Klezmer Violin
www.yalestrom.com
David Lenga, Holocaust Survivor shares ~ Stories from Lodz Ghetto and from his memoir book. “The Compassion of a Deadly Enemy: Even in the Darkest Hours, a Ray of Hope”
Music by Yale Strom & Elizabeth Schwartz
Klezmer Violin and Contralto Website: www.voiceofklezmer.com
Philip Raucher – Los Angeles Polish origin, featured at the LA Museum of the Holocaust
Music by Jonathan Font Moxo –Hlicha Lekesariya(Eli Eli)
Bruce Bierman ~ Dance with the Holocaust, Berkeley
Stand up to dictators! ~ poem read by Gilberto Melendez
Myra Goodman, author, “’Quest for Eternal Sunshine’—A Holocaust Survivors Journey for Darkness to Light,” co-authored posthumously with her father, Mendek Rubin. questforeternalsunshine.com
The story of Ilana Kahat, shared by Eva Ariela
Donna Kanter – “The Presence of their Absence” Trailer
thepresenceoftheirabsence.com
Second Generation Sharing (Q&A)
Fred Zaidman, the principal in Donna Kanter’s documentary Trailer
Yvette Nachmia – Poetry
Music by Jonathan Font Moxo – Prayer of Transformation
Music by Eric Alderfer, (Psalm 126) New York
Tes Kempner – Six Million Candles: New World Anthem
Piano Accompaniment and Arrangement by ShaRone Shmuel David Kushnir
Closing Circle and Prayer ~ Eva Lindberg
The post Auschwitz
poem by Professor G. Stendig-Lindberg appeared first on The Holocaust History - A People's and Survivor History - Remember.org.
Remember.org
A private in the 3rd platoon, (Military ID 359-1-38), Erik Viggo Ringman (1918 – 1945) drove a Volvo Spetsnos, a light truck converted for this journey. Gift #9: Erik Viggo Ringman How does one say ‘Thank You’ to those who risk death to save strangers in need? Does history even remember these 308 bus drivers, […]
The post Erik Viggo Ringman – Gift #9 of the White Bus Rescue appeared first on The Holocaust History - A People's and Survivor History - Remember.org.
Remember.org
“The Nuremberg Code rejects the ideology of Eugenics and unequivocally asserts the primacy and dignity of the individual human being – as opposed to “the greater good of society.” Read the Nuremberg Code Download the PDF Get the Book on Amazon Vera Sharav, Holocaust survivor and human rights advocate, speaks first at the 75th […]
The post Nuremberg Code – Vera Sharav speech at the 75th anniversary appeared first on The Holocaust History - A People's and Survivor History - Remember.org.
Remember.org
A brilliant mind and photographer left us this week, and my heart misses my friend Alan Jacobs whose Auschwitz Concentration Camp Virtual Tour is a breakthrough way to see the camp, even if you never are able to visit it. Missing my friend, Alan Jacobs Enter Auschwitz Krematorium 1 and take the tour with videos […]
The post Auschwitz Concentration Camp Virtual Tour appeared first on The Holocaust History - A People's and Survivor History - Remember.org.
Remember.org
Listen to the poem. The Holocaust: A Poem of Remembrance, by Tamara Beryl Latham Skeletal frames, whose beaten hearts once bore, the heft of Hitler’s war, who knelt en masse, in silence quaked with stifled groans beneath the veil of death. Through reddened tear-stained eyes they prayed in vain, for meager crumbs of hardened moldy […]
The post The Holocaust: A Poem of Remembrance appeared first on The Holocaust History - A People's and Survivor History - Remember.org.
Remember.org
One of the extraordinary aspects of the Eichmann trial is that no one knew very much about the Holocaust when the trial began. Holocaust survivors did not speak about their ordeals at the hands of the Nazis until the trial. While over 60 years ago, Eichmann Trial Lesson Plans and Research into what drove Eichmann […]
The post The Eichmann Trial – When Survivors Speak appeared first on The Holocaust History - A People's and Survivor History - Remember.org.
Remember.org
Gift #4 Lise Borsom Born September 18, 1908, Norwegian citizen Lise Borsum was “just the wife of wealthy Norwegian doctor Ragnar Børsum”[1] until her circumstances required her to become much more. When World War II broke out she rose to the occasion becoming part of a network to help Jews escape to Sweden. Taking great […]
The post Lise Borsom – Gift #4 from Norway – Swedish Red Cross White Bus Rescue appeared first on The Holocaust History - A People's and Survivor History - Remember.org.
Remember.org
The Reality Of What Happened At Jasenovac Concentration Camp During World War II, Croatia was ruled by the fascist Ustashe regime under Ante Pavelić. His government ran Jasenovac concentration camp, where Serbians, Jews, and Roma were most forcibly executed in Croatia. From 1941 to 1945 it’s estimated that more than 83,000 men and women perished […]
The post Jasenovac Concentration Camp appeared first on The Holocaust History - A People's and Survivor History - Remember.org.
Remember.org
The Nordhausen Camp Liberation photos from Milton Geller, in the Big Red 1, 18th infantry who was there. NOTE: Graphic photos at the bottom of the page. Email Intro with Steven Geller “My father was with the Big Red 1, 18th Infantry and was there at the liberation of Nordhausen. You have one picture with […]
The post Nordhausen Camp Liberation – Milton Geller Photos Big Red 1 18th Infantry appeared first on The Holocaust History - A People's and Survivor History - Remember.org.
Remember.org
COMPLETE PODCAST TRANSCRIPT “Hello and welcome, I’m Shauna Hoffman. Today I am sharing my journey back to Hungary with my mom and the joys and the lessons I learned. My mom was born in Miskolc Hungary, a large city outside of Budapest. She lived there until the Nazis killed her mom, dad, and baby sisters […]
The post Shauna Hoffman Podcast “I Saw the Child in My Mom” | Hungary Holocaust Survivor appeared first on The Holocaust History - A People's and Survivor History - Remember.org.
Remember.org
Joseph Weismann’s story is remembered for Holocaust Remembrance Day (Yom HaShoah) 2020. Joseph Weismann – After the Roundup Background On the nights of July 16 and 17, 1942, French police rounded up eleven-year-old Joseph Weismann, his family, and 13,000 other Jews. After being held for five days in appalling conditions in the Velodrome d’Hiver stadium, […]
The post Joseph Weismann – Remembering with After the Roundup appeared first on The Holocaust History - A People's and Survivor History - Remember.org.
Special Your Brave Heart's Most Inspirational People Podcast Series:
"Ellie Shares Who Inspired Her!"
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( length approx. 10 minutes)
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Special Your Brave Heart's Most Inspirational People Podcast Series:
"Ellie Interviews Michelle Anton About Whom Has Inspired Her Most!"
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Special Your Brave Heart's Most Inspirational People Podcast Series:
"Ellie Interviews Mark Victor Hansen As He Shares His Most Inspirational Person!"
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( length approx. 10 minutes)
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Special Your Brave Heart's Most Inspirational People Podcast Series:
"Ellie Interviews Jerry Clark About His Most Inspirational Person!"
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( length approx. 10 minutes)
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Special Your Brave Heart's Most Inspirational People Podcast Series:
"Ellie Interviews John Assaraf About Whom Had Most Inspired Him!"
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( length approx. 10 minutes)
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What does your Soul want to do?
Is the world receiving your Commitment?
For a lot of you analytical thinkers, or Triple A personality sales Men and Women, I know that you may be thinking "Come on Ellie! Tell me something that's going to make me some money yesterday!" I know that because I used to feel that way.
Let me share with you what my definition of "Commitment" is. Commitment is the energy that is communicated from the transaction that occurs when we connect to the reason why we are here. Our Purpose. Our Soul's plan.
We are all the same because physiologically we are made up of the same things. Energetically we are also made up of the same things. We are all the same most importantly because our one Creator created us.
We are different in that our Souls have different plans. When we connect to and surrender to our purpose, we get out of the way. We release our soul and step by step allow the creative power of the universe to assist in manifesting our Soul's plan within our lives.
You may say: How do I find my purpose? You already know what your purpose is. The feeling of not knowing comes from the perceptions, patterns, and emotional congestion that is getting in the way of your clarity and connection to that which you already know. It is time to let go of boundaries my friends. It is time to unleash yourself into whom you already are.
What does this have to do with your business? What does it have to do with prospecting?
This is the foundation upon which you Connect, Attract, and Manifest.
When you are connected to your purpose, you generate commitment energetically and vibratorily. This commitment communicates willingness and leadership to the world. Your prospects are out there in the world.
Life is a game. It is not to win, it is not to lose. It is to play it while striving to manifest the reason why we are here.
Create an awesome game. Play to the best of your ability. Ask for assistance. Be coachable. Trust.
Are you allowing yourself to be creative and intuitive? Creation and Intuition nourishes Intention.
Self expression frees our life force to move and therefore this flow of energy allows us to tap into a warm peaceful state of being. This state might be similar or different for people according to the difference in our creativity. Learning to follow our intuition with creation involves taking chances. This is the only way to learn not only what works, but also how to learn to trust our instincts whether it is in performing a personal project or connecting with other people.
One of the bigger intuitive moves I have ever made was when I was 15 years old. I remember sitting in a large room at the American Embassy when we were hoping to receive a visa to come to America. I could hardly speak any English, although I had tried to study English on my own, and had even taken a few classes. But learning a few words is obviously not enough to make a conversation, especially a conversation that would perhaps determine the course of your life. When our number was called to go to the consulate and be interviewed, I had a sudden intuitive feeling. I remember my Mom was about to bring a translator into our interview area with us when I told her that I wanted to speak to the consulate myself. She looked at me like I had lost my mind. Intuitive feelings fuel our intention. So when she felt my intention, she agreed although I remember she shook her head all the way to the interview booth as if she had lost her mind to agree with my proposal. But in most cases, loosing our mind is the reason why we hear our intuition. My intuition inspired me to want to speak to the consulate myself. Had I known that the conversation would be a mostly one way conversation, I might have allowed fear stop me, by getting back in my mind. It turned out although my answers to the questions that the consulate was asking sounded very similar one after the other, but I guess he must have felt the intention. My part of conversation was mostly comprised of two words. "Repeat Please?" But as we have already heard, it’s not only the words, it’s also the music.
Creativity allows us to be more intuitive, and less analytical. Be light, be joyous, make a difference in how another feels by perhaps changing the way you feel. Creativity is a state of consciousness in which a person aligns their inner energy and vibration with the pure universal energy which is the source of all creativity. A creative person is not one who has had creativity as a personality trait, or a genetic factor. It also does not mean that a creative person is only an eccentric type of individual who is into arts and music. Although that certainly can be true, but creativity is a source of energy that all who would like to tap into it, have the ability to do so.
To understand the Principle of Liberty, first become aware of its context. This principle encourages us never to take for granted the external liberty within which we can create a life of success and fulfillment.
Within that context, this is the content of the principle. To have such a life, we must have internal freedom to such an extent that we can unleash our willingness to create success.
Perhaps you will find this story of the context liberating and inspiring. If the story succeeds, then the Principle of Liberty will always hold great meaning for you.
It was 5 a.m. I washed my face with the lukewarm water and looked at myself in the mirror, catching the light behind my dark, almond-shaped eyes. I placed the mandatory scarf on my head, attempting to cover what seemed at the time to be too much hair to cover. I picked up a bag filled with books and started walking on a steep dirt road about two miles away from our first destination. Out of our house, to the right, then about 100 yards, and then a sharp turn to the left. My favorite part of this first small road was a little creek, perhaps two feet wide. The sound of water going down the creek seemed to help prepare me for the road ahead. One step at a time. Sometimes I would come back to reality when the sweet yet tired voice of my mom would say, “Faster, Elham.” (Elham is my Persian name. It means inspiration.) I would speed up to walk alongside my mom, inhaling the cold crisp morning air of the small town called Karadje, which lies 50 miles from Tehran, the capitol of Iran, the country in which I was born. We would walk the two miles every day to the top of what seemed to be a never-ending dirt road. Then I would catch a bus and ride into Tehran, where my parents had decided I would attend middle school. I guess you could say that we were middle class. I know that my parents worked hard, and they accepted nothing but excellence for me and my future.
To keep my mind entertained during the very cold mornings of winter, or the hot, dry days of the summer, I would focus on one goal. I would walk up that familiar dirt road, and teach myself one English language word. It didn’t matter which word, as long as it sounded like it could be understood by a person from Texas, Florida, New York, or California. Those were the only states I knew the names of at that time. I had much more to learn, in many subjects, so I stuck to my practice – one word per day, across two miles. “Sky. That’s S K Y.” Got it! As long as I repeated the spelling another 40 or 50 times, I would be able to hold on to my new word. I hoped that I was pronouncing it correctly. The next day, “Light. That’s L I G H T.” The day after, “Food. F O O D.” Then, “School. S C H O O L.” One day I almost gave up. It took an extra day and two additional miles to get this one down: “T A B L E!” Why, I wondered, isn’t it spelled T A B E L?
Word after word, thought after thought, dream after dream, hope after hope! I must say I believed the principle of “You must first believe it before you see it.” I believed that one day I would be able to walk on a road pave not with dirt, but with gold.
A message from Ellie Drake:
Being like a Rubber Band:
Being stretched can turn out to be very positive.
Imagine a rubber band. You hold one end of the band in one hand while stretching the opposite end of with your other hand. The more you stretch it, the more the rubber band wants us to let go it so it can come back to it's original position. In just wants to return to its place of comfort.
Yet if we continue stretching it, that rubber band will eventually grow into a new size. When we let go of it now, it will come back some, but not the entire distance. In essence, it has developed a new dimension.
Now imagine that you dip this original rubber band into hot wax, then quickly remove it. You then allow the wax to dry. At this point, if you repeat the stretching exercise you'll notice that as you extend the rubber band the wax caked around it cracks and crumbles, then falls off.
The same dynamic occurs with humans. We don't want to get stretched, because it will involve letting go of some external layers. We are comfortable within those layers, and they may even seem to be protecting us. Yet, in fact, they are getting in the way of the new, evolving being who we already are on the inside. They are an impediment to our growth.
Also like that rubber band, we must temporarily experience being uncomfortable when we stretch and grow. In the process of becoming the butterfly we were metaphorically meant to be, we are outgrowing a cocoon. The butterfly doesn't snip off its wings and re-enter the cocoon. It knows of no such thing. But we, as human beings, have a tendency to snip our own new-grown wings so we can retreat to the cocoon that represents our old zone of comfort. Unfortunately, the zone of comfort is seldom the territory of fulfillment. The butterfly has no choice. The human has an ability to make such choice.
The next time you are feeling stretched and uncomfortable, pat yourself on the back and say "Good for me. I must be growing!" In fact, if you are not stretching, growing, and evolving, then you are probably too attached to being comfortable.
The home based business industry brings us opportunities to grow and stretch consistently. Every day look at your challenges as opportunities. The question you may be asking is "How can I do that?"
The real question to ask is not "Can I?", It's "Will I?"
How "willing" are you? or better yet "What are the reasons why you may want to allow willingness into your life and therefore your business?"
I look forward to having you on the call this evening(Monday Sep 18th) at 10:30 p.m. eastern. The number is 212-990-8000 pin 4033# Call in early, the lines will be full.
Be Brave,
Your friend along the way,
Ellie Drake
p.s. Watch for an email tomorrow (Tuesday) that will give you a tremendous tool to create results in your business with Ease!
Post your comments on this newsletter by going to www.BraveHeartBlog.com.
Free Weekly Teleconference
"Know what you want, and hold on to what you know!"
212-990-8000 Pin 4033#
Are you ready to receive a dose of inspiration?!
This Monday night 10:30 p.m. eastern
Ellie Drake will be presenting her Free Weekly Teleconference
On Monday Night September 18th, be sure to be
on at 10:30 p.m. eastern.
Title: The Inspiration Teleconference
"Inspiration = Production"
This will be a call for entrepreneurs who are willing to get out of their own way and therefore produce results.
This call will assist in raising the consciousness of the listeners, assisting them in being more passionate, taking steps in the direction of their purpose, and being open to receiving.
Ellie looks forward to creating a team of individuals who will collaborate, grow, and produce.
The number is 212-990-8000 Pin 4033#
Forward this email to a few of your friends and colleagues. This call will assist them to grow to the next level in their lives and businesses.
See you there!
Upcoming Events:
September 23, 2006 Dallas, TX
Connecting and Attracting in Business Workshop
Ellie Drake, Erica Combs, & Susan Sly
Dallas, TX
Register Now
or call 1-866-Heart-19 (1-866-432-7819)
A message from Ellie Drake:
Dear Friend:
I trust you are having a great time with family and friends during this holiday weekend.
The month of September is here! I find it amazing that time passes us by whether we take advantage of it or not.
It is as if we get up every morning with a blank piece of paper and a pen in our hands and we have equal opportunities to write the script of our life however we choose to.
It seems that we each also have an empty suitcase every morning. It is up to us to fill it with what we choose as well.
I have learned that if I don’t consciously fill my suit case everyday, that if I don’t consciously write on the blank piece of paper I have been given on a daily basis, the suitcase fills up on it’s own and the blank piece of paper gets written on, except not according to my conscious choices. Instead my unconscious habits will do the job for me.
The challenges with having my unconscious habits do the job for me, is that I will keep creating experiences that are very similar to past experiences that did not work to begin with.
Having said that, I know that a great majority of you reading this newsletter are entrepreneurs striving to create a life of design.
Did you know that Sep-Oct-Nov are historically the momentum creating times of the year?
What would happen if you allowed yourself to create passionately, enthusiastically and consistently during the next 90 days?
I can answer that for you and with you. Based on my own experience in the last 10 years as an entrepreneur, a ‘let’s step it up’ attitude during these months can set the foundation for an entire year in 2007.
You may be a bit skeptical about this. You may be thinking that you have heard this before. You may be thinking that you haven’t reached the results in the past and may be a bit concerned about re-committing to a new level of passion and therefore production.
I know that because I used to feel the same way myself. However, what I have found out is the following:
It doesn’t matter how skeptical, fragile, or frustrated you may think you are, my friend you are underestimating the resiliency within you.
Why do I say that? Because you are still here. You are reading this newsletter today, and within your heart is a voice that is bigger than all the noises in your head.
The resistance within you is smaller than the passion you feel and therefore the vastness of this passion keeps you here to continue striving in order to be an agent of change.
That is why you read newsletters, you listen to conference calls, you go to seminars, you listen to Cds, and you read books. You are indeed doing what more than 95% of the world will not do!
For that, I hope that you take a breath and pat yourself on the back. I hope that you stop criticizing and comparing yourself with others, and start trusting in your own particular journey.
Having said all of that, let’s go back to the Sep-Oct-Nov months that are ahead of us.
Tomorrow afternoon, I will be releasing a state of the art tool that is going to be my gift to you. This special life changing business building report will change the way you look at your business. This report will give you amazing tools and strategies to create momentum in the next 90 days.
No report like this has ever been released in the home based business industry. You want to be sure to watch for an email from me on Tuesday early afternoon that will give you access to this very special report.
In the mean time, make sure you get as many people to sign up for my newsletter today so that they can benefit from this report as well. It will only be available for a short period of time. Have them go to www.BraveHeartProductions.com and register for tomorrows Fr.ee Report
Remember the time is now.
If not Now, WHEN?
If now You, WHO?
I wish you tremendous success in the next 90 days and beyond.
Your friend along the way.
Ellie Drake
Post your comments at www.BraveHeartBlog.com.
Free Weekly Teleconference
"Know what you want, and hold on to what you know!"
212-990-8000 Pin 4033#
Are you ready to receive a dose of inspiration?!
This Monday night 10:30 p.m. eastern
Ellie Drake will be presenting her Free Weekly Teleconference
On Monday Night September 4th, be sure to be
on at 10:30 p.m. eastern.
Title: The Inspiration Teleconference
"Inspiration = Production"
This will be a call for entrepreneurs who are willing to get out of their own way and therefore produce results.
This call will assist in raising the consciousness of the listeners, assisting them in being more passionate, taking steps in the direction of their purpose, and being open to receiving.
Ellie looks forward to creating a team of individuals who will collaborate, grow, and produce.
The number is 212-990-8000 Pin 4033#
Forward this email to a few of your friends and colleagues. This call will assist them to grow to the next level in their lives and businesses.
See you there!
A message from Ellie Drake:
Dear Friend:
My recommendation for you this week is to really take advantage of the tool that I have put together for you by going to www.TheBraveHeartWithin.com in order to start your week right. We have received tremendously positive feedback from many people that have reflected on the messages that they have received. You never know in which way what you may Hear, Say or Do can affect you and potentially thousands of others.
Ellie Drake
p.s. Go to www.ItsEasierDoneThanSaid.com to get your
FREE CD.
Free Weekly Teleconference
"Know what you want, and hold on to what you know!"
212-990-8000 Pin 4033#
Are you ready to receive a dose of inspiration?!
This Monday night 10:30 p.m. eastern
Ellie Drake will be presenting her Free Weekly Teleconference
On Monday Night August 28th, be sure to be
on at 10:30 p.m. eastern.
Title: The Inspiration Teleconference
"Inspiration = Production"
This will be a call for entrepreneurs who are willing to get out of their own way and therefore produce results.
This call will assist in raising the consciousness of the listeners, assisting them in being more passionate, taking steps in the direction of their purpose, and being open to receiving.
Ellie looks forward to creating a team of individuals who will collaborate, grow, and produce.
The number is 212-990-8000 Pin 4033#
Forward this email to a few of your friends and colleagues. This call will assist them to grow to the next level in their lives and businesses.
See you there!
Upcoming Events:
October 19-21, 2006 Atlanta, GA
BraveHeart Women
Ellie Drake
Atlanta, GA
Click here to register online,
or call 1-866-Heart-19 (1-866-432-7819)
November 9-11, 2006 Atlanta, GA
BraveHeart Women
Ellie Drake
Atlanta, GA
Click here to register online,
or call 1-866-Heart-19 (1-866-432-7819
A message from Ellie Drake:
Are you emotionally literate?
Let's talk about emotional intelligence. I have called this EQ in the past. Emotional intelligence or Emotional Quotient is not merely about controlling emotional responses so that others don't know what's going on within us. It's also not about repressing our emotions for our own sanity.
It's about using our emotions appropriately. Emotion is powerful in many aspects of our lives. It's at the heart of sincerety, it activates fight or flight when necessary, and some of the most positive emotions such as Joy are very healing.
Emotionally literate people are like parents and grandparents to their emotions. Parents acknowledge the child's requirements, love them, encourage them to be creative, yet manage them wisely when they act negatively. This analogy is appropriate for the emotionally literate.
Another attribute of the emotionally literate is that they are great self correctors. Even when they mis-judge the degree of their emotion and drift away into the world of illiteracy, they gently come back with a lesson learned. The foundation of this lesson is acceptance not criticism.
Finally, the emotionally literate are not of the mind set that believes emotions should be repressed-"Seen but not heard","Big boys and girls don't cry", etc. Equally important yet on the polar opposite, they are not of the mind set that allows their emotions to leak out at every undesirable event. They don't have to express themselves at every conflict either little or big and therefore indirectly and directly strengthen their FQ (frustration quotient).
Oh by the way: If you are not comfortable with your own emotions or find it difficult to manage them correctly, you may be suffering from emotional dis-ease. This means that in addition to not being connected to yourself, you are perhaps finding it difficult to connect with others. Subliminally, you may be causing others to bring up their guards in the presence of the disconnection you subconsciously communicate. And guess what? Anti-depressants may fix some of the symptoms but certainly not the cause!
The cause:
An unhealthy dose of self-image. Is this reversible? Thank Goodness. It certainly is. I attribute my own progress in this area to the world of self development. I learned that there is always room for self improvement. Kind of like dessert!
The process begins by making a commitment to developing a positive and healthy self-image.
Here is one last point I'd like to offer: Warren Buffet said: If you can't manage your emotions, don't ever expect to manage money!!
Remember failure is not bitter if you don't swallow it.
Be Brave,
Your friends along the way,
Ellie Drake & BraveHeart Productions
p.s. Go to www.BraveHeartBlog.com to post your responses and comments.
Free Weekly Teleconference
"Know what you want, and hold on to what you know!"
212-990-8000 Pin 4033#
Are you ready to receive a dose of inspiration?!
This Monday night 10:30 p.m. eastern
Ellie Drake will be presenting her Free Weekly Teleconference
On Monday Night August 14th, be sure to be
on at 10:30 p.m. eastern.
Title: The Inspiration Teleconference
"Inspiration = Production"
This will be a call for entrepreneurs who are willing to get out of their own way and therefore produce results.
This call will assist in raising the consciousness of the listeners, assisting them in being more passionate, taking steps in the direction of their purpose, and being open to receiving.
Ellie looks forward to creating a team of individuals who will collaborate, grow, and produce.
The number is 212-990-8000 Pin 4033#
Forward this email to a few of your friends and colleagues. This call will assist them to grow to the next level in their lives and businesses.
See you there!
Upcoming Events:
August 18-19, 2006 Chicago, IL
Connecting and Attracting in Business Workshop
Ellie Drake & Jeffery Combs
Chicago, IL
The next event open to the public will be Aug 18th and 19th in Chicago. Develop your connecting, attracting, listening, and receiving skills. This is a 2 day seminar taught by Ellie Drake, Jeff Combs, and Artemis Limpert. This WILL BE A SOLD OUT EVENT. There are still some spots available. This is a $599 ticket for $99.95 today.
Radisson Hotel Chicago O'Hare
Register Now
or call 1-866-Heart-19 (1-866-432-7819)
August 26, 2006 San Francisco, CA
Women in Power
Ellie Drake & Erica Combs
San Francisco, CA
Click here to register online,
or call 1-866-Heart-19 (1-866-432-7819)
September 14-16, 2006 Atlanta, GA
BraveHeart Women
Ellie Drake
Atlanta, GA
ONE SPOT LEFT!
Click here to register online,
or call 1-866-Heart-19 (1-866-432-7819)
October 19-21, 2006 Atlanta, GA
BraveHeart Women
Ellie Drake
Atlanta, GA
Click here to register online,
or call 1-866-Heart-19 (1-866-432-7819)
November 9-11, 2006 Atlanta, GA
BraveHeart Women
Ellie Drake
Atlanta, GA
Click here to register online,
or call 1-866-Heart-19 (1-866-432-7819
A Message from Ellie Drake
The difference between Humility and being Humiliated:
We tend to confuse the meaning of these two dynamics. In free enterprise, the majority of people subconsciously mistake humility with being humiliated.
The difference:
Humility comes from the core of who we are. Imagine a tree that has lots of fruit. The more fruit this tree bears, the more it's branches will fall toward the earth. To be humble means to be able to stand in the gravity of who we are deeply rooted with an unshakable unchangeable inside and a flexible outside. It means that we realize we are opening ourselves up to allow the grace that flows through us so that we can give a service to the world, striving to assist and empower others.
Our resistance to humility is unconscious because we have confused humility with being humiliated. To us, being humiliated has been equated to being rejected. Ironically, we fear rejection because we haven't practiced true humility on the inside. It's our ego and false sense of self that resists and fears the illusion of being humiliated. We constantly seek approval from others because we haven't realized that we are approved of already, by the One that created us to begin with.
So you see my friends, humility and being humiliated are not the same, and we only fear humiliation when we are not practicing humility on the inside.
You can strengthen your self esteem when you no longer fear humiliation. After all when you stop looking for situations to be offended by, then you stop choosing to be humiliated.
In addition to that, when you know and trust that everything that happens is constantly strengthening you, then you can be humble on the inside, bold on the outside, and grow through every step of the journey.
One of the best ways to release the fear of being humiliated and/or rejected, is to not ask others for their opinions when you know the answer yourself.
Examples:
Do you think my business is a good one?
How did I do today?
Do you like what I wrote?
and many more...
In essence when we keep asking these questions, we are indirectly asking: Do you like/accept/approve of me?
In this way, we constantly give our power away and are at the mercy of other's opinions which are based upon their own perceptions and illusions.
This is what we are saying subconsciously:
"Today I am going to let your illusions determine the value of who I am and I will take those illusions, process them within me and will create my own set of illusions that are based on your illusions. Finally, your illusions plus my own illusions will cause me to feel "bad" which I call being humiliated."
How do you break this pattern? You stop seeking approval from others, start approving of your Self, practice humility on the inside, and boldness on the outside.
When you are confronted with the illusions of the world, you take a look over your shoulder, brush off the dust, the chip, and/or the load that may be lodging on you as debris getting in the way of your clarity and self worth. Then you move forward!
A light load and a lofty dream! That's the name of the game. Are you willing to play?
I wish you tremendous success.
Be Brave,
Your friend along the way,
Ellie Drake
www.ItsEasierDoneThanSaid.com
Dear Entrepreneur:
Behind many glorious moments is consistency.
Consistency in what?!
In Intention, Passion, Surrendered Action, Letting go of the outcome, Trust, and Gratitude.
Ready Set Go! Intention, Passion, Surrendered Action, Let go of outcome, Trust, and Gratitude.
Intention: If you don't know where you are going, chances are you'll drift away.
Passion: Forget raising your level of ambition. That's working hard! Ambition is the outcome of a healthy dose of Passion. Want to raise your level of Ambition more effortlessly? Choose something to be Passionate about. Create Smart rather than work hard.
Surrendered Action: This is the motto I live by. "How I am going to do it is none of my business." All I know is I am going to start.
Let go of outcome: Yes you must know where it is you want to go, but being attached to the outcome will end up draining your energy and enthusiasm.
Examples of being attached to outcome:
When is it going to happen?
Where are the sign ups?
I thought it should have happened by now!
Something has got to give!
Trust: Trust is the nourishment of your actions. Trusting the process is as important as watering your flowers. It doesn't matter how many seeds you plant, if you don't water your seeds, they won't grow. Trust that it'll happen in the time it's supposed to. All you can do is plant the seed. It's not your job to create the flowers!
Gratitude: If you aren't grateful for where you are, you won't be given more to be grateful for!
Regardless of where you are on the outside and perhaps in your business, there are many things you can be grateful for in your life.
How about:
Your Health
Your family
Your Relationships
Your Friends
How about being Grateful for the fact that no matter how rainy and dark it is today, the Sun will rise again tomorrow.
Can you do that?
Once again Ready Set Go!
Intention, Passion, Surrendered Action, Let go of outcome, Trust, Gratitude
It's not a matter of can you do that, it's a matter of Will you do that!
Here is a very simple guideline to help you along the way!
Choose a Goal!
Write down 20 reasons why you should pursue the goal!
Take one action step toward that goal Today! This is called Courage!
Repeat this process for 30 days! When you get there, you'll see further.
Remember It's Easier Done than Said!
Why?
Because the burden of wasted potential is the biggest burden of all!
Be Brave!
Your Friend along the way,
Ellie Drake
p.s. Join me on a Free conference call this Monday evening at 10:30 p.m eastern. The # is 212-990-8000 Pin 4033#
We have people calling in from all over the globe. To find out your own local time equating to 10:30 p.m. eastern, go to
www.worldtimeserver.com
Are you close to Chicago?
Come meet Ellie on Aug 18-19th.
This will be a sold out event very soon.
Go to www.BraveHeartProductions.com and click on events.
Are you ready to unleash the BraveHeart Woman within! Go to www.BraveHeartWomen.com
Are You Aware of The Common Pitfalls in Business?
Awareness Precedes Action
Ellie Drake
Common Pitfalls to be Aware of in Business:
Here are some possible resistance's along the way, not necessarily for us to avoid and resist, but most importantly to be aware of and know that they are there. Even the most dedicated traveler on this journey, will come across pitfalls.
First pitfall: Obsessive goal orientation -
Although it is great to set ambitious goals, the best way to reaching them is to cultivate modest expectations along the way, and most importantly to celebrate every small achievement. Remember every step in this journey is it's own destination. As an example, when we are climbing a mountain, we must be aware of where the peak is, however if we keep looking at the peak, we might become overwhelmed and enter the state of judgment and analysis. This by the way, will cause a reverse effect, sometimes making us go backwards. Let's make sure that we keep our eyes on the path, enjoying every step in this process, understanding that the peak is only a land mark. By the way, we must also realize that the peak is only a step in the journey from which we choose the next peak. Life is full of peaks for a person who wants to live their potential as a human being. Therefore, we might as well enjoy the process of getting to each of them.
Next pitfall: No goal setting -
Sometimes as human beings, we tend to refuse to set goals merely because we are carrying the burden of having set them in the past, but not having accomplished them. We must realize that if we do not accomplish a goal, it's only because we are human. But as long as we learn from it, and keep on setting healthy step by step goals, we will end up accomplishing a majority of them in the long run. Those who have succeeded, have also failed. The only difference is that they succeeded more than they failed. Therefore, setting healthy goals along the way can sharpen and empower us. Persistent healthy goal setting will end up being persistent goal getting!
Next pitfall: Little competitiveness -
A healthy level of competition is essential in business. It provides some spice. It sometimes brings about that extra level of willingness. It is true that the most important competition should be to compete with ourselves. However, it is important for us not to resist competition especially if we resist it because of not wanting to be disappointed. This is perhaps another subconscious pattern. So let's welcome a healthy level of competition understanding that we can be on the right track, but if we don't move, we might get run over.
Next pitfall: Over competitiveness -
Competition can provide the spice. However, when the spice becomes the biggest ingredient in the meal, then the player will get sick. A person who thinks about nothing but winning, will end up losing. The focus should be on one's purpose, and also enjoying the process. A healthy level of competition is good. An obsession with winning and competing will take us out of the flow. After all, we know by now that the Ego is never in the flow.
Next pitfall: Inconsistency -
Consistency is the only way to grow. Inconsistency takes energy and time. Being consistent, even on a part time basis, is much more powerful than coming in and out of this flow. Remember the example of the Rabbit and the Turtle? Sometimes in business, it is better to have a turtle mind set, than that of a Rabbit. I remember to create in my business, I had a rabbit-turtle combo. That means have the mind set of a turtle, with the motor skills of a rabbit. But that is perhaps another Article. One step at a time! Starting with consistent steps.
Next pitfall: Perfectionism -
For me, being a perfectionist brings about an instant self criticism component. I am glad to say that I have learned to be good to myself. Therefore, I have realized that to let go of perfectionism, means to get out of the way, and perform to the best of my ability in the moment. This also brings in an understanding that the next level will be more effective, and more efficient than this level. However, the next level will not occur, unless the current level is experienced fully without judgment and attachment. It's to believe that we can not merely wait till we are good. We must first do, and then we will be good. I have truly learned that perfectionism is one of the biggest blocks to creativity. I have also learned when I am creative, I accomplish more. When I accomplish more, I feel good. But to be creative, I now know that I must first feel good. So in this equation, the enzymes that catalyze the reaction are feeling good and being creative. This equals accomplishment. Perfectionism is the stop sign. It is the resistance in the way. Once again, I want to take the road of least resistance. So in the world of creativity, flow, and accomplishment, perfectionism is not an enzyme. It is a fungus! That should give you a nice mental picture! Ok. Moving right along!
Next pitfall: Plateaus -
In business, we so often resist plateaus. We feel that if we experience a plateau, then that means that something is not quite right out there with our business or our company. Although that sometimes can be true, but this definition can end up being one that exhausts and drains us. I have learned in my business to not resist the plateaus, but rather have them be an indication of perhaps an internal modification that might be required. That means that during a plateau, we could look inside and improve or change something that could allow us to grow. One step toward internal growth can sometimes end up being hundreds of steps toward external growth. Therefore, one will realize that a plateau can now be embraced rather than resisted. Building a business is so much more fun as well when a thing such as a plateaus is looked at differently.
Ellie Drake is CEO of BraveHeart Productions. She is a Keynote Speaker, Coach, Doctor, and Successful Entrepreneur. She realized her love for speaking at a very young age. Speaking comes from the core of her soul, and she inspires the audiences as she talks about the "American Dream" and her journey to America. Ellie came to America 14 years ago, and loves to talk about this great land of Liberty and Free Enterprise.
Ellie will make you laugh, cry, and get motivated when she shares the importance of living a passionate, fulfilling, and balanced life.
Ellie doesn't just speak, she lives what she speaks about. Because of her previous involvement in the industry of direct sales and as a result of being the top income earner in her company, she's able to share through experience what works, what doesn't, and why.
Ellie has shared the stage with:
T.Harv Eker
Les Brown
Mark Victor Hanson
Jim Rohn
Jerry Clark
Jeffrey Combs
Denis Waitley
Arthur Joseph
and many more!
Ellie is now highly sought in many countries, and is known for inspiring and educating her audiences to experience quantum leaps in every aspect of their lives. Learn more about Ellie at www.ItsEasierDoneThanSaid.com
or www.BraveHeartProductions.com