Relationship Anxiety: Recent Episodes
McKell Kristen
Welcome to the Relationship Anxiety podcast! This show if for people who worry about their relationship, questioning if their relationship is truly right. Is he really the one? Am I really in love? Tune in for tips and tools to manage this anxiety with certified life coach, McKell Kristen.
Join today's client interview with Sarah. Some of the topics we will cover are...-Decision making-Rightness-Attraction-LoveFor more of Sarah's insights, check her out on Instagram @sincerely_smb
This week we are talking about future you. About the future you want to create and who you want to become. Rather than the worst case scenario your brain is offering, I want you to start imagining what could be possible for you and your relationship (in the best possible way).
As the year wraps up, today we are going spend some time reflecting on your relationship with your past self- everything from identity to anxiety to your relationship.
Today we are doing something a little bit different. We are talking about beliefs around money, the fear that can come up, and mental shifts that can make all the difference in you relationship to money.
As uncomfortable as anxiety can be, feeling good can actually be uncomfortable in its own way. Today we are talking about navigating and letting yourself enjoy the positive emotions!
Today we are talking all about the superiority we give to certain relationship choices and experiences, and how who you are and your experience within a relationship is good enough (wether or not other people acknowledge it).
Today we are talking all about how to navigate the moments where other people don't like you or your partner.
Today we are talking all about navigating different political perspectives (and disagreements in general) within your relationship.
Find yourself longing for butterflies in your relationship? Today we cover all things about butterflies and anxiety.
Have you ever noticed once you identify anxiety (or any other problem you are struggling with)that you immediately try to frantically fix yourself? Today's episode is for you!
Today's episode is an oldie but a goodie! We are talking about how we tend to rely on other people to make choices for us. For anyone struggling with making decisions, big and small, I made something for you.Come to my workshop to learn how to become a more confident decision maker!In three days you'll . . . Get to work with me LIVE for $19Learn skills and tools to helpConnect with other peopleHave lots of fun!Don't wait, sign up at www.mckellkristen.com/confidentdecisions
Hey y'all! For anyone struggling with making decisions, big and small, I made something for you.Come to my workshop to learn how to become a more confident decision maker!In three days you'll . . . Get to work with me LIVE for $19Learn skills and tools to helpConnect with other peopleHave lots of fun!Don't wait, sign up at www.mckellkristen.com/confidentdecisions
Toxic positivity is the belief system that you should always be thinking and feeling positive. This belief system often contributes to our experience of relationship anxiety.
Have you found yourself questioning if these thoughts are God trying to speak to you? Worrying about why you don’t have more peace in this relationship? Today’s episode is for you!
Do you find yourself spinning on what if my needs aren't being met? Todays episode we talk about better understanding your needs and why you might be feeling a gap.
Relationship Anxiety is often very preoccupied with what might happen in the future, or worried about how things happened past. Today we are talking about why being present in your relationship is essential to overcoming relationship anxiety.
Do you find yourself clinging to the opinion's of others about your relationship? For better or worse? Today's podcast episode is for you!
Get caught up in nitpicking your partner? Today's episode is all about why we nitpick and breaking the cycle.
Have you felt the desire to work on your anxiety, but been scared to take action? Today we are breaking down some of the fears that may be holding you back from getting support and going all in on working on your anxiety.
Have you found yourself wondering the difference between anxiety and intuition? Worried that all these thoughts might be your intuition? Tune in for a break down of the difference between the two and some basics on discerning your own fear.
Today we are bringing it back to an oldie but a goodie. Garbage thoughts episode, is so helpful if you keep getting caught up in the "But why are these thoughts here" and "How do I get rid of these thoughts" traps. Wether this is your first or second listen(or more), this episode is a great way to shift your relationship to the intrusive, unwanted thoughts.
Do you find yourself hearing about someone else's breakup or affair, and immediately start comparing your own relationship? Anxiety can lead us to taking on other people's relationship stories as our own. Today we are talking about how to process change or pain in someone else's relationship, without personalizing it.
With relationship anxiety, our mind might go to the "what if's" of possible lives...
What if I would be happier single, traveling abroad? If only I was back in college? What if I should have chosen a different career path?
Today we are talking about these fantasies our brain creates, and how to use them in a way that empowers your relationship.
Today we are interviewing my client Reagan Lynn, talking all things relationship anxiety and about how ROCD can impact our spirituality.
Check out Reagan's ROCD story and insights here on Instagram- https://www.instagram.com/the.rocd.reformer/
Today we are talking about your family of origin, expectations for love, and how you can create your ideal relationship is possible for you (no matter your upbringing).
Today we are talking about objectification and how it plays a role in relationship anxiety.
Every worry that your anxiety has damaged your relationship? Today we are talking about this and how to deal with the hurt anxiety may cause.
Our emotions have momentum, for better or worse. Today, we are talking about the emotional spiral we sometimes create for ourselves and how to pause it.
Today we are talking about Love Myths. The misconceptions we have about love that often keep us stuck and confused in our relationships.
Do you find yourself in a rush to fix your anxiety? To hurry and eliminate it from your life? Today we are talking about why we get stuck in a rush and how it often keeps us from actually making progress.
Often, the fear of failure is one of the roots of relationship anxiety. We so desperately want to avoid failing, that we avoid putting ourselves out there in the first place. Tune in to understand this fear from a new perspective.
Does disconnection in your relationship terrify you? Today we are talking about how to experience disconnection differently and see the experience through a different lense.
What is your thought identity? Have you been making your doubts and fears about your relationship who you are? Today we are talking about thought identity and how to separate yourself from the thoughts you experience.
Today I am sharing my story and personal experience with relationship anxiety. From how it showed up in my life to how I started making progress with and truly overcoming it.
Today we are talking about the shame blame cycle, and how we often get trapped between blaming our partner or shaming ourselves, which leaves us stuck in our anxiety patterns.
Today we are talking about common feelings we might confuse for love, and how these love signal mixups might lead us to question our love.
Your desire to be honest might actually be fueling your anxiety around your relationship. Just because you feel guilty about your thoughts, doesn't make it warranted. Tune in to learn how to deal with guilt in a way that serves you and your relationship.
Find yourself frequently wondering if staying in your relationship is truly the right thing to do? Or if you partner is really right or wrong for you? Today my coach, Lindsay Dotzlaf and I talk about how looking for the right decision is not the most useful paradigm to approach your relationship, and what to do instead.
Ever feel like you are a negative person? Or your brain just tends to focus on whats going wrong? This is actually your brain working the way it is supposed to! Human brains are actually wired to focus on the negative, aka the negativity bias. Today we are talking about how this bias impacts your relationship anxiety.
Today we are talking about secure attachment, what does it look like and how do we start developing it within ourselves.
Today's episode is about anxious attachment, how it shows up in relationships, and how this attachment style may be playing a role in your relationship anxiety.
This is part one of a three part series. We are talking about different attachment styles and how they play into our relationship anxiety. Today is talking about the avoidant attachment style, what can create it, and how it shows up in relationships.
Do you find yourself asking questions to test your partner? To figure out if its really right? Or if they really love you? Today we are talking about how these questions keep us trapped in an anxious loop and how to break this habit within your relationship.
Today we are talking about our tendency to blame emotions on our partner, and why taking responsibility for them can be so empowering.
Today we are talking about love ability, and how relationships are an opportunity to develop our ability to love.
Today we are talking about commitment myths and what commitment can look like when experiencing relationship anxiety!
Today we are talking about trust within a relationship. What trust looks like, why it is so essential, why you might choose to withhold it, and how to cultivate more trust within your relationship.
Every human wants to feel good. But sometimes our pursuit of happiness is the very thing that fuels our experience of anxiety. Today we are talking about how seeking to only feel good creates more pain, and how allowing for the experience of pain can actually make your life drastically better.
Our fantasy of love is and who our partner should be. Being willing to let go of the fantasy is one of the keys to letting go of anxiety.
Today we are breaking down some of the reasons that we experience relationship anxiety.
It can be easy to look to romantic relationships to be our everything. But we forget that a core friendships are essential to a fulfilling life. Today, connection and friendship coach Jewel Hohman is sharing how to create, maintain, and deepen friendships in a way that will not only enhance your romantic relationships, but your overall life satisfaction.
To learn more about coaching with Jewel, visit https://www.jewelhohman.com/
As we begin the process of working through anxiety, we imagine what healing will look like. However, often our very objectives can be the things that stands in the way of us feeling better. Today's episode we are redefining what healing looks like to set goals that will better serve you in working through anxiety
"Should I tell this person about my relationship anxiety?" or "How should I share with them?"
Today we are talking about opening up about relationship anxiety. It can be hard to share such a vulnerable topic, but today we are breaking down when you should share, when you might want to consider not sharing, and how to go about it.
We are breaking down the idea of "If you know you know", why this advice might be misleading, and how to shifting your perspective on knowing.
Feeling unattracted to your partner can be one of the feelings most feared by relationship anxiety, but today I am breaking down how feeling unattraction is one of the most useful things to experience in your relationship.
Today we are talking about gratitude and how it can impact & ease relationship anxiety.
Today we are talking about one of the most common fears and intrusive thoughts "What if this isn't Relationship Anxiety?"
Catastrophe thinking is a landmark of anxiety. Today we are talking about how catastrophe thinking shows up, and how to shift out of worse case scenario to thinking patterns that will serve you.
Today's episode is advice on navigating a relationship with a partner who deals with relationship anxiety.
Anxiety tends to stem from the belief that we can control the world around of. Today, we are talking about what is within your control, and what is outside of it.
After finding a moment of peace, it can be easy to quickly jump to anticipating the next moment anxiety returns. Today we are talking about how to navigate our anxiety about anxiety.
Today is part two on fighting. We are talking about strategies that are useful in arguments and how to deal with the relationship anxiety that comes up.
Today we are talking about disagreements and the strategies we use that often keep us stuck!
Today we are talking about the rulebook we create for relationships- all the things we think it has to be in order to be "right."
Today we are doing something a bit different. I wanted to take a moment to pause, say thank you, and feel so gratitude for our partners who have been with us along this journey. Share this episode with your partner, or just tune in yourself. Take a moment to reflect for yourself how you are grateful for your partner's support
Today we are talking about the human void, the sense of something is missing or could be better, that we all experience. This void shows up from looking to the weekend for things to be better, to wishing our relationship was different.
Setbacks are a part of the process of working through anxiety. Today's episode is all about navigating those setbacks and leveraging them in a way to work through anxiety at a deeper level.
Today we are talking about the tendency to make our relationships too important, to the point of getting hyper focused and paralyzed.
We are quick to assign labels in the dating process.
Spiritual, Outgoing, Reserved, Immature...the list goes on and on.
Today we are talking about the things we assume and take as truth about our partners.
Today we are talking about people pleasing- what it is and how it impacts relationship anxiety.
After dealing with anxiety for an extended period, our brain will offer thoughts like...
He deserves better I should love him better This isn't fair for her
While these thoughts sound nice, they can tend to actually amplify our anxiety and not help us show up as our best self. Tune in to learn more.
Often we fear making any decision around our relationship because it could lead to regret. Today we are talking about regret and how to not be so afraid of it.
Today we are talking about the fear that your partner doesn't love you, and some tips to let this fear stop controlling you!
Today we are interviewing one of my male clients, Jack Steward, on his experience with relationship anxiety and getting engaged!
Today's episode is on five reasons why you might still feel so stuck in relationship anxiety
Today we are talking about happy expectations in relationships. Our expectations that we put on ourselves to be happy all the time. For our relationship to look a certain way in order to be happy.
Worried about feeling boredom in your relationship? Or afraid your partner might get bored? Today's episode is for you.
Human brains off lots of not useful thoughts. Some of these thoughts we hold on to and give more weight than necessary. We judge and shame ourselves for having these thoughts. Today we are normalizing these garbage thoughts and helping you get a new perspective on them.
Do you find yourself thinking "My partner is closed off" or "He isn't good at communicating" Today we are talking about communication one-ups- how we tend to judge our partner's communication style and ultimately create disconnection ourselves.
Relationship anxiety can mean looking for and misusing advice. We take advice against ourselves and our relationships. Tune in to learn how to intentionally apply advice.
Myths that we believe are true about making decisions and moving forward in our relationships.
Myths that we believe are true about making decisions and moving forward in our relationships.
Today we are talking about our relationship with our brain and different approaches to managing or parenting. Tune in to learn what is effective and what isn't.
Relationship anxiety craves "normal" Are these thoughts normal? Is my relationship normal?
Tune in to understand this need for normal and why we crave it so badly.
Every relationship and life moves at their own timelines. But many of us put pressure on the relationship moving at a certain speed, or that our past dating should have looked differently. Tune in to learn more about your relationship timeline and how to stop questioning it.
Today's episode we are talking about the positive 50% of relationship anxiety. The reward that relationship anxiety gives us, that keeps us hooked in the game we play with our brain. Tune in to learn how more about the positive 50%, and how needing it keeps us stuck in the anxiety loop.
Today's episode is about decision outsourcing. We want to rely on other people's input to guide and direct our relationship decisions. We hand our decisions over to other people, and discount our own wants and desires.
Overcoming relationship anxiety can feel like an impossible task. We get stuck in discouragement and defeat. Today we are talking about making the impossible happen. Mastering relationship anxiety requires believing that is possible for you. Tune in to learn how.
You might have a strong conviction of loving your partner, but be unsure of if you are actually "in love". Today we are talking about the distinction between the two and how it impacts your relationship.
We have anxiety about relationships. And believe it or not, we also have a relationship with our relationship anxiety. How you choose to think about your anxiety is everything. Human tendency is to beat ourselves up for our anxiety and try to hurry and get rid of it. But this actually keeps us stuck in our anxiety loops. Tune in to today’s episode to learn how to create a different relationship to your anxiety.
Our process for deciding he is the one can get a little over complicated with anxiety. But just because we complicate it doesn't mean that it has to be complicated. Tune in to today's episode to learn about how relationships might be much simpler than you are making them.
Today we have special episode! I interview one of my clients on her experience with anxiety and her recent engagement. In addition to her personal experience, we talk about tips to deal with anxiety and having the confidence to get engaged. This is an episode you don't want to miss.
As humans we have needs. We put a lot of pressure on our relationships and partners to meet all of our needs. Often that can leave us feeling resentful of them. Tune in to today's episode for insight on your needs and getting them met.
Have you found yourself spinning out in trying to identify wether or not your relationship is healthy? Today's episode is for you! Tune in for a new perspective on what healthiness looks like in a relationship and how overanalyzing your relationship's healthiness might actually be keeping you stuck.
Relationships require vulnerability. Allowing other people to see you and your partner, flaws and all. But many of us prefer to hide behind the mask of perfection. That if we can just find the perfect partner or become the perfect partner, then we wouldn't have to feel shame. This is an episode you don't want to miss!
Love at first sight...is it real? Is it essential to getting the relationship you truly desire? Has something gone wrong for not experiencing this?
Tune in to today's episode to learn more.
Our past relationships are something our brains can easily get stuck on. We can compare our feelings right now to the feelings we had towards our ex. Or we can be angry and bitter towards our ex. How we choose to view our past relationships can either empower us, or hold us back. Tune in to today's episode to learn how to think about your ex in a way that empowers you.
"Is this the right decision?" Is a question many people with relationship anxiety wonder. Tune in to get new insight and perspective on the right decisions in your life.
Do you find yourself trying to anticipate the future? Trying to imagine how things might go? And feeling anxious as you brain anticipates all the ways things could go horribly?
Tune in today to learn about future projecting, how it is impacting you, and guidance for what to do about it.
Do you find yourself overanalyzing your conversations with your partner? Maybe you think you both should have more in common. Or maybe you worry that you conversations need to be better in someway. Tune in for some insight into conversation and connecting with your partner.
Today we are talking about progress with relationship anxiety. Often it can be easy to feel stuck or overlook the progress we have made. Tune in to understand and better embrace your own progress.
Today we are talking about emotional health. Tune in to understand your feelings at a whole new level, and to cultivate a better relationship with your emotions.
Today we are talking about divorce. Misbeliefs and fears about divorce hold us in our relationships. Tune in to find out how to shift your mindset.
Relationship and commitment can sometimes create an identity crisis. We believe that we need to figure out all the details of our lives before moving forward in a relationship. Today we are talking about finding yourself while in a relationship.
Today we are talking about butterflies, and how often we want to feel butterflies in order to feel confident that our relationship is "right." I discuss what butterflies are, how we cultivate them, as well as understanding what love truly is.
Knowing how to discuss anxiety with a partner can be challenging. Our fears can often lead us to hiding what is going on for us. On the other hand, fear can often lead to talking obsessively about our anxiety. Today I am talking about how to navigate discussing relationship fears with your partner.
Today we are talking about your future self. That person who has achieved your dreams and gotten exactly where you want to go. We talk about how tapping into that energy is key to overcoming fears and living to your best life today.
Today's episode is about dealing with doubts. How do you respond to doubts when they come up? Do you try to delete them or ignore them? Do you notice that they become more intense? Tune in to learn how to respond to doubts about your relationship in a way that serves you.
We are either in love or out of love. We are completely happy or not happy at all. All or nothing thinking happens when we make judgements about our relationships. But ironically, it takes away from experiencing our relationship at its fullest. Tune it to learn how to shift out of all or nothing thinking.
Do you find yourself wishing that your partner loved you more? Or that he showed his love more? Today I am talking about self love, and how cultivating a loving relationship with ourselves can help improve our relationships with our partner.
Do you find yourself comparing to other couples? Do you wish that your relationship was like someone else's? Today we are talking about comparison to other couples and how to shift your perspective.
We gave a manual for how we believe our partners should be. And our happiness hinges on them following our rules for them. Today I am talking about what a manual is and how it might be holding you back in your relationship.
Do you find yourself taking every little thing in your relationship too seriously?
Today we are taking about how to think about your relationship in a way that serves you and being able to have fun in your relationship.
What if there is someone better out there? Today we are talking about this common question and fear that anxious brains love to focus on.
Let's create abundance in your relationship. Today we are talking about how to experience your relationship at its fullest, rather than focusing on everything that is "missing."
Are you focused on how your relationship isn't enough? How you might not feel enough love?
Today I am talking about the scarcity mindset and how it impacts the way we look at and experience our relationship.
Often our brain loops on the same problem, trying to solve for our relationship over and over again. This loop, while it may feel productive, does nothing to actually solve for what we are struggling with. Join me today as we talk about how to get out of the loop we often get stuck in.
Are you terrified of your relationship going wrong? Is there a worst case scenario that you work so hard to prevent? Today I am breaking down these fears and how to start facing them.
Feeling shame about your anxiety? You are not alone! Today's episode is all about how shame, what it is, how it strengthens anxiety and what to do about shame.
What if this anxiety is God telling me something? Maybe God is trying to tell me this relationship isn't right? Today I talk about understanding anxiety and God's will in our lives.
Thoughts are constant and persistent. What we do with our thoughts is our choice. Do we pay attention to them? Do we believe them? Tune in to learn how some of your thoughts about your relationship are optional.
Today's episode is about how we expect relationships to be easy and natural. I talk about why we have this mindset, how it holds us back, and how to shift our relationship beliefs.
Do you every feel the compelling need to breakup? Or to ask someone else what for their opinion about your relationship? If this sounds familiar, you have experienced urges in your relationship. Tune in to learn more about what urges are, how they can be harmful, and what to do about them.
Today we are talking about the chase. Often we get fixated on the excited of pursuing a relationship, rather that being in a committed relationship. Tune in for a new perspective on dating and falling in love.
Sometimes we put pressure on certain moments to look and feel a certain way. A date, a walk on the beach, or a birthday. When we demand a given moment feel a certain way, we create anxiety for ourselves. Today's episode is about managing our expectations and being present with what is.
Today I invited Amanda Louder, certified sex and marriage coach, to discuss anxiety around sex. We talk all about why we have anxiety around sex, how to deal with worrying about it, and tips for enjoying sex even when you feel anxious. To download the roadmap for personal pleasure, go visit http://amandalouder.com/relationshipanxiety
Today's episode is about trying to prove our worth through our relationship. That if someone from our past saw that we ended up with this perfect guy, they would finally recognize our own worth and value. We want our boyfriend to provide us with a glow-up. Tune in to learn more!
When committing to a relationship, fears can come up about what if I am settling. Tune into this episode to learn what settling truly is, and how to identify it in a relationship.
Today's episode is about our habit of being anxious. We are so used to feeling anxious, that we start looking for reasons to feel anxiety, even when things are going really well. I talk about why we have this habit, as well as how to break it.
Many of us wish we didn't have relationship anxiety. We desperately want to get rid of it. In today's episode, I am sharing some of the things I have learned from relationship anxiety and why I am grateful that it has been a part of my life experience.
As humans, we experience lots of negative emotions. It can be easy to freak out about our own negative emotions or our partner's. Today's episode is all about making peace with your negative emotions. Your negative emotions are not so bad when you allow them. And they mean absolutely nothing about your relationship.
Many of us don't not how to navigate the challenge of relationship anxiety. We get stuck. We want to give up. We loose faith in ourselves and our ability to manage anxiety. Today's episode is all about our mindset around challenges and how to navigate what you are going through.
What is love? How do we know if we are really in love? Today's episode is all about understanding what love is and how to create more love in your life.
It is easy to freak out about thoughts. To not want to think certain thoughts that are "bad." But what if your thoughts about your relationship were just that? Thoughts. Today's episode is all about making peace with and accepting your thoughts
We all love a good love story. But it can be easy to compare our love story to movies, our fantasies, or other relationships. Today I am talking all about how to make peace with our real love stories and how to tell them in a way that serves us.
Sometimes we think that the only solution is to leave. That we can only feel better if we change or get out of the relationship we are currently in. In this episode, I break down why moving on from a relationship can't fix anxiety, how there is room to heal, and feel more peace within your current relationship.
We all have emotions. Positive emotions and negative emotions. It is part of being human. But that tiny part of us believes that our relationship should make us feel perfectly happy and content all the time.
This episode is about learning how to manage negative emotions that come up in our relationships, without making the negative emotions mean anything about our relationship.
Do I love him? Do I really want to be with him? I don't know what I should do. Our brains love to be confused. Today's episode is all about managing confusion and creating clarity.
Feeling extra relationship anxiety with the quarantine right now? Don't worry, I got you. Today's episode is all about feeling peace, loving your partner, and managing your mind during this crazy time right now.
What makes us attracted to someone? Does it just happen, or is it something we choose? This episode is all about understanding where attraction comes from, and how we create the feeling of attraction.
Relationship anxiety loves to focus on the what ifs...
What if he isn't the one? What if I am settling? What if I am not actually in love?
This episode is all about understanding these what if questions and learning how to manage them in our lives.
This episode is all about the types of anxiety in relationships. Understanding the anxiety that shows up in your relationship is the first step to conquering it. This episode is perfect for those who just discovered they are dealing with ROCD or anxiety in a relationship.