LET'S TALK ABOUT SEX!

Today Brittany Broaddus-Smith-Sexologist and I discuss navigating our sexual identity. Have you actually sat down to assess what sex means to you? Mass media, Secondary School- Sex Ed, Church Culture and the awkward conversations with parents or the silence of parents all informed us of what sex is.

To become an owner of your sexual identity you have to review all your ideologies surrounding sex and assess what aligns with who you are, your values and convictions.

Nuggets:

Developing your sexual ethic starts with understanding what sex is.

Sexual authenticity is honouring what is real for you- we are tripartite beings so enjoying the sex that your having requires the soul, body and mind to be unified in the sexual experience.

Sexual ownership- requires that the sexual engagement has been consented to and you have equal equitable rights to communicate that you would like to sexually engage or disengage (without any coercion).

Becoming confident in your sexual identity begins with knowing your body- look at your genitals!!!

Sexual compatibility is developed when you place yourself in the position of learner. Give yourselves the grace to grow, unlike porn real sex is not a performance.

To be vulnerable about sexual trauma with your partner, trust must be built for it to be safe space.

Vaginismus- is the body's automatic reaction to the fear of some or all types of vaginal penetration. Whenever penetration is attempted, the vaginal muscles tighten up on their own. Secondary vaginismus- when you have previously enjoyed painless penetrative sex but have later developed uncontrollable vaginal muscle spasms.

There are several causes as to why one may have vaginismus but seeing a health professional, a pelvic floor physical therapist can assist with muscle relaxation either with direct interaction or using dilators.

Vaginismus is known to be caused by mainly psychological factors-seeing a therapist may be useful to address the fears associated with sex.

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