When not at Walt Disney World, our kids really enjoy watching or reading about Walt Disney World. So when I saw this video collection, a 5-pack of DVDs highlighting each park and the Disney Cruise line, I was intrigued. The kids loved our own movies (2007 version shown here), so I guessed that a dedicated video created with all of the resources of Disney including characters, music and direct footage would be the pinnacle of multimedia for Disney Park lovers.
Disney gives out a different free vacation planning video. It is a good thing, too. If they gave out these souvenier videos, no one would come.
We begin by loading the Magic Kingdom DVD. Things start innocently enough as we are treated to a series of aerial shots of the park and the castle...
along with this balloon from the 70s/80s. Actually there is a lot of old canned footage mixed in; which is fine, other than it looks like they captured that old footage from a bootleg by hooking up two old VCRs.
We are greeted by our hosts, Mickey and Minnie. Having now watched all the videos I am actually pleasantly surprised that they used the real character voices for every character. The mice are going to give us a tour of the Magic Kingdom (sans any rides like Pooh where they would have to pay 3rd party royalties).
Apparently this tour was taped at sunrise in the middle of September since the Magic Kingdom was not a crowded sea of humanity.
Chip & Dale take over for the Swiss Family Treehouse, and tell some jokes so bad that Dale wishes he could make like a tree and leave.
Goofy, shown here flailing his arms like he is in a Richard Simmons video, is very excited to take us on a ride on Big Thunder Mountain!
Unfortunately, the film crew couldn’t get the same special access they could on Main Street and we are treated to footage taken from directly behind the train so you cannot see anything.
From there we see clips of other Frontierland favorites, and right about the time they get to the Country Bear Jamboree it hits you: they have been using non-Disney stock music for the entire video. That’s right, Disney’s merchandise division couldn’t even secure the rights to use in-park audio.
So with this knowledge we go to the Hall of Presidents, where Lincoln is now being voiced by Stephen Hawking. More time on the video is devoted here than any other attraction, which makes perfect sense for a kids video.
Minnie takes over the tour at Fantasyland. The tour goes on in much the same way except instead of narrating Minnie coos and giggles in a way that makes you wonder what she is doing up there.
Peter Pan and Wendy ride their own ride, but not before Peter takes 30 seconds to do the most flamboyant and intricate point to the sky ever that must been seen to be believed.
Donald and Daisy take over in Tomorrowland, where in the future clothes look like something from The 5th Element. Donald eases Daisy’s fears about riding Space Mountain…
And then proceeds to take her on the tamer, side-by-side seated Disneyland version of the ride in Anaheim.
The show closes with Mickey and Minnie watching a blend of current and old nighttime parades and fireworks complete with stock music together from the Train Station.
As much of an abomination as this video was, it was actually by far the best of the lot. Having the characters voiced by the official voice actors at least helped set this one level above an amateur film. Such is not the case as we travel to the other parks.
In Epcot we are greeted by Dr. Cy N. Tific, who is going to be our tour guide of Future World. He is also doing the same format and shtick from the Magic Kingdom video with one slight difference: he is not a costumed character. He is a creepy over-actor you have never seen before. No way your kids are liking this.
Once again, we see footage of Epcot from the early 80s when it had a skyline that wasn’t littered with fish-shaped hotels.
In the World Showcase we are greeted by representatives who tell us fun facts about their country. Unfortunately, the facts don’t get more profound than “we have Vikings in Norway” so don’t expect an education here folks.
But at least they are closing with Illuminations. Heck, even with the cheesy stock music that can’t be all bad, right?
Except your viewing has voice-over from a cheering (and almost moaning) Dr. Tific, who is clapping so feverously that his hands disappear.
Even the film’s editor crew gets tired of this guy, evidenced by the fact that they fade to black before he is done giving his good-bye monologue.
Onto the Studios where it wasn’t yet “Hollywood Studios” but they didn’t want to pay royalties for “MGM” so we just have “Disney Studios”. Once again we have a mix of old and new footage, which this time is a little misleading because it leads you to believe that the park is still a functioning studio. Oh well, you bought this DVD in the park so I suppose you already know better.
But what’s this? We are rolling! They are in the middle of filming some exciting new hybrid of High School Musical and the car chase from Ronin…
The huge Hollywood star has arrived by limousine! The crowd anxiously waits just to get a glimpse…
Why even Mickey is star struck as he shows respect to this Hollywood icon on his own home turf…
Alas, we are greeted by the films hosts – the stars of Streetmosphere. These are performers at the Disney Studios park that behave as if they were stars and other Hollywood-types of the 30s and 40s. I am not a fan, but I get the appeal inside the parks where they ham it up and interact with the park guests. Why, they even get guests involved with impromptu film scenes in the middle of the park…
but here you see A LOT of them. More of them than the actual park. In between the skits where they advance their plot, they show the attractions. Or, rather, they show themselves experiencing the attractions. Here is a grown man dressed as a little girl, which will actually get you kicked out of the Disney Parks.
Although they do actually show Star Tours and the Tower of Terror, most of the content where they would have to pay royalties has been removed; as shown here on The Great Movie Ride. When the camera isn’t on the characters having hot flashes, it is showing the most generic scenes from the ride possible.
Until they destroy the “magic” and suspension of disbelief entirely by showing that mobsters really don’t die when shot, their floating torsos are lowered by a robot arm.
When the video shows ride scenes that the child-scarring Streetmosphere characters cannot possibly be a part of, such as the Rock n’ Rollercoster, the video quality takes a noteworthy dip. Noteworthy in that is looks like it was ripped from YouTube.
Onto the Animal Kingdom where our host is Journey Jack. (Yes, I know what you’re thinking: THE Journey Jack?) JJ tells us that Animal Kingdom is an adventure.
For his part, JJ is not as over the top as the other hosts; and Mickey even shows up from time to time. He does have a habit of telling a bad joke every 30 seconds. No harm, no foul, right? Except that they follow his bad jokes with the “whah whah” music and another extended period of him laughing at himself. My son was wondering “when are they going to show the rides?”
He will have to wait as we go to Dinoland where we meet Chester and Hester. I thought that Chester and Hester were the dinosaurs holding the signs at Dinoland but apparently they are stewards of the world’s most lurid trailer park. You learn something new every day. You also learn in their 3-hour spiel that Chester isn’t meeting his wife’s expectations.
Back to Journey Jack who has run into some costumed dinosaurs who slowly devour him.
Sadly he survives long enough to find Mickey and ask him if he has spotted any leopards. Mickey is made a liar when he indeed confirms the discovery of Animal Kingdom’s non-existent leopards. Journey Jack is made a liar when he puts over Camp Minnie-Mickey as a Campground in the Wilderness.
Journey Jack shows his range as an actor when his safari passes the poachers. He also gives some misinformation such as “Hippos are good swimmers” which is not only false but the fact that they don’t swim but walk along the bottom is part of the regular script on the Kilimanjaro Studios ride. I wonder if the safari’s script was purposely updated to correct anything that was heard in this film.
Our coup dis grace is the Disney Cruise DVD. This video shows tells the story of a little girl named Lisa, who gets a piece of a treasure map from a hyper-active Mickey. Lisa is told that she and her family must find the other pieces to find the treasure.
The boat departs and stock audio rears its ugly head again as apparently even the boat’s famous whistle song costs too much in royalties to be heard on the film.
We get on board and learn that a Disney Cruise means that you and your family can take entirely separate vacations. We are shown a bunch of kids left in the science lab…
And adults at the fitness center; including with this woman, who could not be more thrilled to be here.
The family does see each other to eat, and when they do they discover that they have all been finding pieces of the treasure map. They also discover dad had a previous life as Journey Jack.
On the private island Castaway Cay, they find the last piece of the treasure map while trying their best not to do a Crocodile Hunter impersonation. The treasure map leads them to….
all of the Photopass pictures from their cruise! Mickey shows up to take their credit card at $19.99 plus shipping per picture.
The videos all contain extras including a “trivia track” where the regular movie plays with a sort of pop-up video trivia reel. Unfortunately even some of the facts here are false. There are also a few on-board vids of some of the rides but for some reason they are abbreviated and again the quality is not good.
For several trips I declined to purchase the set but after seeing the prices that it sold for on eBay I finally broke down and picked it up at the earport shop on the way home; figuring I could sell it and make back most of the purchase price if it turned out to be a dud. Let me advise those of you do own a copy of these videos: they sell for more individually than as a pack.
My recommendation, of course, is do not buy. They don’t hold much value as entertainment or souvenirs. If you want some video to remember the parks you can check out the Travel Channel, which has recently been running about a dozen well-produced shows about WDW. Disney obviously assisted with these productions and put a lot more care into them.
http://search.travelchannel.com/travel/Walt%20Disney%20World
Even the free vacation planning DVD from Disney does a better job of showing the parks from different angles. Just click the link and request one.
http://disneyworld.com/
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