Wannabe Balanced Mom: Recent Episodes
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Seasons come, seasons go… switch things up and ride the flow.
Being consistent with what you’re doing in pursuit of your goals does not mean you do the same thing every day. You must learn how to align with the seasons & switch things up in order to experience FLOW.
When each season comes to a close we tend to experience momentary boredom or even a bit of anxiety or depression. Feeling uninspired or unmotivated.
When the energy of one season shifts to the next we may notice feelings of exhaustion or overwhelm if not in the habit of aligning with the seasons.
This is the moment to go inward, avoid distracting yourself from this uncomfortable feeling.
If you wait long enough you’ll become receptive to a new energy. A fresh new creative outlook will emerge. New ideas, new projects, new focus.
During this transition stage it’s important to listen up to what your inner energy is gravitating towards. Is it time to let some things go? Set something aside for a SEASON?
Is it time to shift your focus to more play and less work? More creating and less consuming? More rest and less rushing?
There’s a time to work and a time to play. A time to rest, and a time to exert yourself.
Spring is coming to a close and Summer is around the corner.
Ask yourself, what needs to change as the seasons change?
For me, my entire calendar gets a make over. I’m shifting from content creation via my podcast, social media, and the MINDSET classes, to more home projects and kid focus.
Seasons are what keeps life so fun and interesting. Always something to look forward to.
Embrace the ebbs to release the intelligent flow of life.
Alignment means awareness of when to pivot, or when to let go.
Right now I’m switching up my rituals and routines.
Wrapping up Spring and gearing up for Summer.
From producing to reducing.
Less work, more fun.
Less online time to more outside time.
Contemplation and plant propagation.
Decluttering and Gardening
Workouts and writing…
What’s your focus going to be this summer?
P.S. I have room to take on a few more clients if you’ve been needing help with managing your time, or managing your emotions. I’m here for yah!
Schedule an appointment now before my summer slots fill up.
https://calendly.com/crystalescobar/1-hour-coaching-session
The post Ep #160: Season’s Ending, New Beginnings, & Letting Go appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
When we hear the word creative, we often think of artsy people who spend their days painting or writing songs and poetry. But creativity is one of THE most powerful energies we can all access.
This energy is not just for the people who we deem as creatives, but it’s available to ALL of us. Not for the sole purpose of creating art per se, but it can be used in our every day lives for creative problem solving, inspired ways of extracting what we want out of life, and innovatively contributing to the collective evolution.
WE ARE ALL CREATIVE
How many of you would consider yourself creative? Well guess what, we are ALL creative. It’s in our very nature to create. We literally create LIFE.
We are designed to procreate, cocreate, and recreate.
Allow others creative work to inspire your own. Maybe you’d like to recreate a song that has already been written by changing the lyrics to match your life experience. Or rewrite the narrative to a well known fairy tale.
When it comes to using creativity in our every day life, maybe it looks more like rewriting the narrative to your past. Thinking outside the box when it comes to the belief system you inherited from your parents. Or simply coming up with a plan to get out debt, move to your dream destination, or turning your passion into a profession.
For me, I especially love to create organized and cozy living spaces. I also enjoy formulating new recipes, rituals, and routines. Recipes for healthy meals and also recipes for personal development. I love creating new systems and formulas within my life coaching practice to improve mental health and well being.
Everything that has already been created is like additional colors to your pallet. You are the artist and your brain is the paint brush. What picture do you want it to create using all the colors you have available to you. Adding someone else’s colors to your masterpiece is not imitating, it’s innovating.
Sometimes the most brilliant inventions come from combining 2 or 3 things that already exist.
That’s exactly how ER Shred was born. We combined different dietary approaches then made a few enhancements in order to create a sustainable and effective protocol.
We limitate when we imitate.
Because it’s in our nature to create AND evolve, we should always have an innovators mind.
How can we expand upon what we already know? If we hope for each generation to be better than the last, we must live in constant curiosity. Always asking questions.
Questions are at the root of innovation.
{Want access to my FREE Journal Prompts and Work Books? Sign up HERE* to assist you in your goal for increased self awareness through daily writing and monthly challenges.}*
If you’re interested in booking a FREE Mini Session then use my calendar link to schedule with me. (New Clients Only)
MY CALENDARhttps://calendly.com/crystalescobar/30-min-free-mini-session
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The post Ep #156: Creativity for Problem Solving & Manifesting More of What You Want appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
In 2 weeks I am officially bidding my boobies farewell. It’s been an extremely emotional decision but I’m ready to let them go in pursuit of better health.
As many of you know I’ve been struggling with skin issues for years.This last fall I had an alarming outbreak that caused me to look deeper into what might have contributed to this horrific rash that practically covered my entire body.
I went to 2 different doctors, even had a biopsy, but neither one of them could give me an answer as to what might have been the cause.
I went down a rabbit hole of information, searching for potential causes which landed me at Breast Implant Illness. After reading countless stories of other women who shared many of my same symptoms, I’m hopeful that getting my breast implants removed will be the answer. Or at least another step closer to better health.
The last 5 years have truly been a process of ELIMINATING all the toxic things from my life. It started with eliminating a toxic belief system (leaving my religion), which then led to eliminating toxic foods (ER Shred), and now working on eliminating toxic cleaning products, toiletries, make up, and so forth. It only seems natural to consider my breast implants being another source of toxicity that my body can no longer tolerate.
{Want access to my FREE Journal Prompts and Work Books? Sign up HERE* to assist you in your goal for increased self awareness through daily writing and monthly challenges.}*
If you’re interested in booking a FREE Mini Session then use my calendar link to schedule with me. (New Clients Only)
MY CALENDARhttps://calendly.com/crystalescobar/30-min-free-mini-session
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The post Ep #155: Explant Surgery | Saying Goodbye to my Boobs in PURSUIT of Health appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
I didn’t know I was codependent until about 2 years ago when Sean “Ferberized” me.
For most of our marriage Sean was my source of feeling good about myself. He always made me feel loved, cherished, sexy, safe, and valued.I’d often say, “boy Sean, I wish I could just see myself through your eyes”.
It’s like pure ecstasy to be loved and seen by Sean. But the only problem was, I got addicted to the “Sean drug” and eventually became dependent on it.
He became my main source of feeling good about me, which as you can imagine is extremely exhausting for anyone to carry that kind of expectation and responsibility.
Sean got to a point in our marriage where he tired of me constantly needing him to fill my cup.
He knew that the only way we would get out of this unhealthy never ending cycle, was for him to allow me to “cry it out”.
So in a sense, I had to go through a detox period and experience all the withdrawals. The pain that comes when ever you’re trying to beat an addiction.
I had to learn to self soothe…
{Want access to my FREE Journal Prompts and Work Books? Sign up HERE to assist you in your goal for increased self awareness through daily writing and monthly challenges.}
If you’re interested in booking a FREE Mini Session then use my calendar link to schedule with me. (New Clients Only)
MY CALENDARhttps://calendly.com/crystalescobar/30-min-free-mini-session
Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Android | RSS
The post Ep #154: My Addiction to the “Sean Drug” | Codependency and Self Worth appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
We’ve all had our fair share of painful relationships and break ups. What if we could talk to the higher self version of the person we “broke up” with.
I imagined us high fiving back stage somewhere. Congratulating each other on a job well done. “Out standing performance” I say. You really taught me some valuable lessons. That all felt so real. I was so in character that I completely lost touch with reality…
{Want access to my FREE Journal Prompts and Work Books? Sign up HERE to assist you in your goal for increased self awareness through daily writing and monthly challenges.}
If you’re interested in booking a FREE Mini Session then use my calendar link to schedule with me. (New Clients Only)
MY CALENDARhttps://calendly.com/crystalescobar/30-min-free-mini-session
Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Android | RSS
The post Ep #153: Making Peace w/ Relationships That Have Ended appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
I have some confessions to make…
For some reason the podcast feels like a safer space to be more open and raw. Maybe because I know that the people who take the time to listen are the ones who truly resonate with what I’m sharing.
So you listeners, thank you!
I’ve attempted to be real open and raw on Facebook and Instagram and it didn’t always go over well. I guess you can say that I’m a little trigger shy now that I’ve tested those waters.
Confession. The word confession has always been a very scary word for me until I hit the age of about 38, I’m almost 42 now. My entire life I feared ever having to go talk to my bishop to “confess my sins”.
When I was 10 years old I had a traumatic experience, I was completely engulfed in shame by this horrific event.
At the time I had no idea what to do with it. I was so scared of anyone knowing about this, but was literally dying inside with my secret.
An entire year later I mustered up the courage to tell my mom. I still remember the overwhelming fear I had. Driving in the car with just my mom and I. My body shaking, palms sweaty, and tightness in my stomach. I couldn’t carry my secret any longer. It felt like poison in my body, slowly eating away at my insides. I had to purge!
I blurted out, “mom, I think I…
{Download my FREE Journal Prompts HERE to assist you in your goal for increased self awareness through daily writing.}
If you’re interested in booking a FREE Mini Session then use my calendar link to schedule with me. (New Clients Only)
MY CALENDAR
https://calendly.com/crystalescobar/30-min-free-mini-session
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The post Ep #152: I have some CONFESSIONS to make appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
“Depression is your body saying, fuck you. I don’t want to be this character anymore. I don’t want to hold up this avatar you’ve created in the world. It’s too much for me.”
~Jim Carrey
Everything was going great, I was on top of the world, ready to take on 2023…
Then I saw her coming my way, I tried to hide so she couldn’t see me. I ducked, I pretended I didn’t see her, but nope. She spotted me with her petrifying gaze and under her spell I went.
This past week I encountered my least favorite emotion, her name is DEPRESSION. She often accompanies me during the winter season of my menstrual cycle. Although I can usually expect her to arrive pretty consistently, sometimes she does’t come at all which then leads me to assume she’s gone for good.
In this episode I’m sharing a sequence of recent events that triggered my inner critic which then led me in a direction that was quite enlightening.
Using my winter/ hibernation season for deep rest and introspection. I’ll tell you what I uncovered this month.
{Download my FREE Journal Prompts HERE to assist you in your goal for increased self awareness through daily writing.}
If you’re interested in booking a FREE Mini Session then use my calendar link to schedule with me. (New Clients Only)
MY CALENDAR
https://calendly.com/crystalescobar/30-min-free-mini-session
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The post Ep. #151: Depression | DEEP REST from the Character You’re Trying to Play appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
We often hear people describe our inner chaos and continuous thoughts as our “monkey minds”. In this episode I want to teach you about your Dog Brain. Allow me to explain…
So the dog brain. Let’s call it a Golden Retriever. Golden retrievers are a breed of dog that we know are highly intelligent and for many reasons are the dog of choice as the star in many of those feel good movies.
When I think of a Golden Retriever, I think loyal, happy, playful, eager to please companions.
Golden Retrievers are extremely smart and quick learners which is why this breed is commonly used for search and rescue and as service dogs.
So, there is a part of our brain called the reticular activating system. This is our filter, our lens in which we perceive the world. It looks for and finds information that validates our current belief system.
Language is what influences the R.A.S. Once it’s activated by the language, it goes on a search and edit mission. Searches for more of these things and edits out the rest.
So just like the Golden Retriever, our R.A.S, when given a command, or SCENTence, it can be trained to search, retrieve, and rescue.
{Download my FREE Journal Prompts HERE to assist you in your goal for increased self awareness through daily writing.}
If you’re interested in booking a FREE Mini Session then use my calendar link to schedule with me. (New Clients Only)
MY CALENDAR
https://calendly.com/crystalescobar/30-min-free-mini-session
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The post Ep #150: Is Your Brain a Dog or a Cat? appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
I’ve attempted to quit plenty of things over my lifetime, as we all have. But ever since 2020 I’ve discovered an entirely new level of discipline. It’s like something suddenly clicked in my brain and I was able to conquer many of my addictions, cravings, and urges.
Things I’ve kicked since 2020, sugar, gluten, coffee, alcohol, pizza, chocolate, my addiction to social media, gossiping, and much much more.
Since noticing this huge shift in my ability to conquer these things, I’ve began to reverse engineer what has been happening to me, which is a lot, and I’ve actually formulated a whole process that I’m now coaching people through, but I wanted to share a small piece with you today to assist you in your resolutions for 2023.
My theme this year is to become a New ME in 2023. I started setting my intensions a few weeks ago and created a free workbook for all of you. If you’re on my email list then you should have received it, if not then you can sign up via this link: http://eepurl.com/cOWSW5
The goal with this workbook is to clearly identify the person you’re hoping to step into, then identify the specific habits you need to develop in order to embody that potential you know you have.
So what I’m getting at here, is that quitting anything obviously starts with HABITS and I’m going to teach you what I’ve found to be the most effective habit forming strategy. And of course, schedule a coaching session with me if you’re needing additional help and accountability.
MY CALENDAR
https://calendly.com/crystalescobar/30-min-free-mini-session
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The post Ep #149: How to QUIT Sugar, Alcohol, or Coffee appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
I love this time of year!
It’s the time to COLLECTIVELY reflect on the previous year, and set our intentions for the new year.
We often hear people say, “you don’t need to wait until the new year to start making resolutions.”
I agree, it’s good to take inventory throughout the year, pivot when needed, and continuously ignite your enthusiasm when it comes to your vision.
So who do you wanna BE in 2023?
Wannabe… this term usually has a derogatory meaning. It’s how we usually describe someone who wants to be something they are NOT. Imatating or trying to be like someone else.
But let’s lighten this up a bit. Let’s imagine the person we wanna BE, not coming from a place of lack or inferiority. Not because we are seeking attention, recognition, or admiration.
But because deep down inside you KNOW your potential, and because you know you CAN be who you wanna BE.
I can’t wait to see you BECOME the person you wanna BE in 2023. Use these journal prompts I’ve created for you to provide clarity, and an opportunity for you to visualize and set your intension for the year.
I’ve been spending the last couple of weeks really contemplating this question and visualizing my entire next year.
I actually really enjoy this process of setting my intentions and planning out my year.
I also love going back and reading my journal entries this time last year. It’s fun to see what I was able to create and where I was at 1 year ago.
As I’ve been getting clear on who I wanna BE in 2023, I went ahead and put together a workbook that I thought others might find useful.
If you’d like me to send you this 11 page workbook then just enter your email here http://eepurl.com/cOWSW5 and I’ll email it to you.
{If you’re already on my list, then you will be getting the workbook in your inbox this week}
Also, schedule a mini session with me if you’d like to know more about how I can help you in 2023.
MY CALENDAR
https://calendly.com/crystalescobar/30-min-free-mini-session
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The post Ep #148: WHO do you Wanna BE in 2023? appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
This time of year, although magical, can also be an extremely difficult time for many.
For various reasons it can trigger unresolved childhood trauma, loneliness, and of course financial stress and overwhelm.
So my intention for tonights call is to hold space for the loneliness, trauma, and stress, as we gently direct our focus towards healing, growth, and freedom from the past.
About a month ago I broke out in this horrible rash. I was so discouraged because I’d like to believe that I’m pretty healthy and that I do what it takes to maintain optimal health.
Many of us have seen tremendous results with our health and wellbeing thanks to the ER Shred protocol. But our diets can only take us so far. It can’t cure our emotional wounds.
It can be a stepping stone and create a HUGE breakthrough, but it’s only a 3rd of the equation when we’re talking about holistic health.
As much as I teach that health is not just about what we eat, it’s also about how well we’re able to manage our minds and emotions, this piece to the puzzle just seemed to slip past my awareness when I broke out in a rash.
My first response was to blame my diet, thinking, what am I doing wrong. What supplement do I need? What should I start eating or stop eating.
I skipped right past the obvious, and my focus went directly to my diet instead of looking at my stress levels and emotional health.
We must always be aware of the whole, body, mind, and soul.
Sometimes we need a little nudge from the people who know us best. Thank you Sean for encouraging me to look deeper.
{Download my FREE Journal Prompts HERE to assist you in your goal for increased self awareness through daily writing.}
If you’re interested in booking a FREE Mini Session then use my calendar link to schedule with me. (New Clients Only)
MY CALENDAR
https://calendly.com/crystalescobar/30-min-free-mini-session
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Check out this episode!
The post Ep #147: Navigating Difficult Emotions During the Holidays appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
The amount of decisions we need to make each day has only continued to increase over the past couple centuries. Think of the amount of choices we are presented with each day. Instead of having to choose between 2 or 3 options, we now have hundreds of different options in every category imaginable. Food, entertainment, […]
The post Ep. #146: How to SIMPLIFY Your Life | When it all becomes too much appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
Don’t take your personality personally, it’s not you. You are the watcher, the observer, the director… Like a scientist, you learn through the experimentation of things. You are not the rat. You are gaining insights by watching the rats and how they respond and interact. P.S. If you’re interested in my Time Management course then […]
The post Ep #145: Don’t Take Your Personality Personally appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
When I was about 21 years old I remember telling one of my friends about my crazy life as a child. She said to me, “wow, you’re going to write a book some day”. That ONE comment sparked a tiny little flame of belief in myself. I never would have expected anyone to say something […]
The post Ep #144: How to turn your DREAMS into REALITY appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
Let’s talk about the marshmallow experiment, except we are going to use eggs instead of marshmallows . Are you a one (instant gratification) or 2 (delayed gratification) kinda person? Don’t forget to join me live on Facebook, Thursday (6:00pm MST) night for our monthly MINDSET call. Also check out my recent YouTube video sharing how […]
The post Ep #143: I Want it NOW! | Delayed Gratification appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
Spent some time over the weekend reading journal entries from when I was in highschool. It’s so fun for me to look back on the person I was then. To visit the 16-18 year old version of me. Lots of thoughts come to my mind. Wondering how differnt I might have been as a teen […]
The post Ep #142: Diary of a Teenage Girl appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
Uploading more bite sized episodes, sharing pieces of some of my recent coaching sessions. The kids are back in school and I’ve been joyously working on my schedule, routines, and time management. Speaking of which, I’m now offering a 4 week one on one Time Management coaching package for $111. I will help you plan […]
The post Ep #141: Relationship talk and update on life after Mormonism appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
The ALL or NOTHING mentality is a cognitive distortion that results in depressions, anxiety, procrastination, binging, and completely sabotaging your progress. It’s a black and white way of thinking, perfectionist syndrome, causing you to see reality in extremes. It’s good or it’s bad… Right or wrong… Success or complete failure… Where does this mentality stem […]
The post Ep #140: ALL or NOTHING Mentality appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
Indulgences are not bad, it’s all about finding a healthy balance and taking breaks from these things for a period of time in order to reset and gain even more control over your urges and cravings. Here’s a new video Sean and I recorded, talking about the ER Shred being the perfect Dopamine Reset […]
The post Ep #139: Dopamine Reset appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
New season of life… We are all finding ourselves in a new season, unlike anything we’ve ever experienced before. A lot of uncertainty and unknowns can feel pretty scary. I hear yah. The last 4-5 years has caused me to do a lot of soul searching and introspection. Unearthing all kinds of things about myself […]
The post Ep #138: Things are shifting for ALL of us… appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
There will always come a time in life when we have to say goodbye… Relationships… Homes… Religion, community, neighborhood… Impermanence is the very nature of life. Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Android | RSS Check out this episode!
The post Saying Goodbye 🥲 appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
Wanna Feel Better? I’m all about feeling better not only physically, but feeling better holistically. MIND 🧠 BODY 💪🏼 & SOUL 🧘♀️ Let me walk you through how I coach myself through various things that I struggle with myself. Submit your questions: https://tinyurl.com/2p8fc2hf Print out your worksheet. https://tinyurl.com/2p975h86 Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Android | RSS […]
The post Ep #136: Wanna Feel Better appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
Innocently many of us believe that our life circumstances are what make us feel good or bad, happy or sad, angry or peaceful. I used to believe that my happiness came from other people’s love and appreciation for me, or when you make a lot of money, or when you reach your goal weight, are […]
The post Ep #135: BELIEFS and How to Change Them appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
“I don’t know…” Is that a statement we should learn to get comfortable with? Is it the way to creative flow? Or is it a statement the BLOCKS the creative flow? A way of giving up? Or is it surrendering to the higher power within us? Depends on how YOU want to interpret it. It […]
The post Ep #134: I Accept I do NOT Know appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
Some guilt crept up in me the other day as I was remembering something I had yet to resolve in my mind. My goal is to be extra attentive each time a past memory or thought comes into my mind and it causes a low vibe emotion. I want to gather all the pieces to […]
The post Ep. #133: No Shame, No Blame, Life is a Game appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
I used to believe my skin was my greatest enemy. Like it’s role in my life was to torture me and make me feel insecure. At one point I even believed it was God’s way of keeping me humble. I don’t want to hide my imperfections anymore. I don’t even want to SEE them […]
The post Ep #132: No Filter appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
I remember back when I was really actively pursing my goal to grow my Instagram following. How much anxiety, stress, jealousy, and overwhelm I felt on a DAILY basis. Often times I would wish I could let it all go. I honestly felt trapped in my own mind about it. For so many reasons I […]
The post Ep #131: In the Grips of Social Media appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
The other day I found myself TRIGGERED by something and wanted to share my process in coaching myself through it. Triggers can show us where our attention is needed. What is unresolved within our subconscious. It’s an opportunity for us to do an investigation and it can actually be a lot of fun. Like solving […]
The post Ep #130: Triggers appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
Our theme this year is Discover YOU in 2022 and I believe the best way to self discovery is through our EMOTIONS. As we get to know our feelings and where they are coming from, we get to know ourselves. We are always saying things like… “I didn’t like the vibe I got from that […]
The post Ep #129: Raising Your Emotional Frequency appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
Little did I know that my initial breakdown/breakthrough would last almost 4 years before I began making sense of things and feeling put back together. The interesting thing though is that it really feels as if I’m putting pieces of myself together but not using any of the old pieces. Like putting a puzzle together […]
The post Ep #128: Confusion to Clarity appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
Over the break I tried something new… I made a goal to go an entire week without reading books or consuming content via podcasts, audible, and YouTube. I know this seems like a silly goal, but one thing I realized is that I have an addiction to seeking answers outside of myself. I’ve identified where […]
The post Ep #127: FOMO | Fear of Missing Out {on social media} appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
I believe we are all vulnerable to unhealthy cult like structures. They come in many forms. Not all cults are necessarily bad, but in my opinion, many of them have unhealthy practices that can lead us down a path of even more separation rather than community. In this episode I explain how I’ve been influenced […]
The post Ep #126: Breaking Free From Cults appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
There’s no doubt Sean has achieved tremendous success in which I’m so grateful for, proud of, and inspired by. But admittedly, there has been a part of me that resents his success when I compare myself to him. I’ve spent over a decade trying to build the same kind of success, but in my own […]
The post Ep #125: Resenting My Husbands Success appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
Explaining where I’ve been the past few weeks.
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The post Ep #124: Ghosted…Why I Disappeared appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
Our motto this year is really been about letting go and letting it flow. So this week on the podcast I wanted to elaborate more on that topic since I feel that has been such a big part of our experience lately. 2020 has really turned out to be a gift in many ways. Mostly because it has presented us with the opportunity to practice our “letting go” muscle.
It’s been one of those huge letting go lessons that has yet again turned out to be the catalyst for receiving MORE. It’s one of the benefits of allowing things to flow instead of gripping so tightly to results, expectations, and outcomes. Many of us have a strong hold on what the outcome SHOULD be in any given situation. And if it doesn’t go the way we hope then it leaves us feeling discouraged and sorely disappointed.
We are taught at a young age, that if you believe then you can achieve. But there’s the fine print that I never even considered before. There have been many times in my life when I BELIEVED. But things didn’t happen the way I wanted which always left me wondering, WHY?
Did I not believe enough? Do I not deserve it? Am I not worthy of it?
What I didn’t realize is that I was believing in the wrong thing. Instead of believing it would happen the way my limited perspective wanted it to happen, I needed to believe that my deepest desires are at play. Desires that I may not even be aware of yet. It’s a part of me that is still unknown, the unrealized aspect of me that is manifesting the magic.
It’s the part that has the power to manifest what is truly wanted, at a deep soul level. So it’s more like getting into a space of believing that what ever the outcome, what ever happens, it’s all happening for me and for my greatest benefit. Beneath all the superficial, impatient, human minded desires. It’s much deeper, and much more gratifying. So trusting in that can be extremely empowering.
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The post Ep #123: Letting Go & Letting it Flow appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
Today Sean and I wanted to share an update as far as where we are, mentally and emotionally as it pertains to our journey out of Mormonism.
This past year has been quite the whirlwind. I turned 40 and for some reason, along with that came a whole host of internal issues that came up for me. I was struggling with finding a purpose and positive outlook on life.
I was confused and overwhelmed by my own lack of beliefs and unanswered questions. There were so many things swirling around inside of me and I couldn’t make sense of any of it. Felt like absolute chaos.
At the same time I was becoming more tolerant of the Mormon beliefs. I didn’t feel as much anger and resentment around it all. Sean and I both stopped focusing on it and decided that we were done being “post Mormons”. We wanted to just be US. So me made a conscious decision to put our energy elsewhere. In that sense things felt great, but on the other hand I was plagued by my lack of purpose.
I was so worried of being deceived or brain washed that I became far too skeptical of everything. In my attempt to become more of a realist I had completely closed myself off from believing in anything.
My world became so black and white and I didn’t even realize that I had unintentionally blocked out all the beautiful colors. It’s as if I was trying to go back to my tiny “box” like home, and out of fear, began nailing all the doors and windows shut in order to protect myself, believing that even the sun itself was a threat to me.
It’s only been recently that I’ve allowed myself to believe in something again. Things like God, prayer, Jesus, and spirit. But I don’t believe in God, prayer, and Jesus as Mormons do and the way most religions do.
I would like to even use different terminology for these things because I don’t want to associate it with any kind of religious belief. But God for me is just source energy. The part of us that is one with everyone and everything. There is the human part of us, but then there is also the “being”. And that to me is God, and each of us come from that same source. It’s like God is the ocean and we are all part of it, each of us is a drop in the ocean. We think we are separate but that’s impossible. If we are a drop in the ocean then we ARE the ocean.
Prayer for me now is just a way to send out positive vibes of gratitude to the universe and also a way to ask for answers and guidance in my life. I want to believe that the universe responds to the requests we put out there. As I’ve allowed myself to pray again, of course it’s nothing like the Mormon prayers. I don’t get on my knees, I don’t address God or Jesus. I simply think or say all the things I’m grateful for, then I ask for answers to questions in my heart. That has been a really cool thing for me to practice. I’ve noticed some awesome things and it really feels good to accept some of these things back into my life but in a much different way.
And as far as Jesus goes. I still think of him as an important figure in history who taught us a lot of good things through his parables, wisdom, and example. I think a lot of what religions teach about Jesus is completely misunderstood, misused, and misinterpreted.
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The post Ep #122: Update on life after Mormonism appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
I’m BACK at it my friends. I had a crazy busy summer and in this episode I’m just catching you up on what I’ve been up to the past few months.
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The post Ep #121: I’m BACK! appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.
The more people I get to know on a deeper level, the more I’m realizing that every one of us has some level of childhood trauma.
Not to shame and blame the caregivers because heaven knows I’m no saint when it comes to parenting.
We are all doing the best we can with what we know therefore we must offer that same understanding and compassion for the people who devoted so much of their time and energy in raising us.
Healing the inner child is not about bringing up old wounds for the intent of revenge but rather to rewrite the narrative.
Today on the podcast Lenny Evans gives us some useful tools to start the work of healing from past trauma.
Lenny Evans is an author, motivational speaker, belief coach, yoga teacher, and much much more.
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The post Ep #120: Healing Childhood Trauma appeared first on Wannabe Balanced Mom.