Gangaji Podcasts: Recent Episodes
Gangaji
For over 20 years, American born teacher and author Gangaji has reached thousands around with world with the words of her teacher, H.W.L. Poonja (Papaji) to “call off the search” and to inquire into the truth of who you really are. Now, in her first radio show, Gangaji and host Hillary Larson take a look at the issues we face in our everyday lives, one topic at time. Every month, for thirty minutes Gangaji will be addressing subjects like addiction, chronic pain, intimacy, anxiety, depression, enlightenment, death and many more.
Join us as Gangaji helps us find freedom in the face of what we experience in our daily lives.
"Just as you are right now, present yourself fully, nakedly with all of your imperfections and no hope of cleaning them up. Then see what is, see what welcomes you just as you are."
As human beings, we have a natural egoic desire to improve ourselves. It is part of our survival mechanism, but when that desire turns into an endless search for perfection, we overlook what is already whole. What if for one moment you consciously choose to stop all efforts of self-improvement and simply meet yourself just as you are? What fear arises to be met? In this recording Gangaji reads a letter that dives into this essential invitation to stop. It is an opportunity to see through the lie that "something is missing” and recognize the true depths of who you truly, already are.
Learn more about Finding Home, Gangaji's new six-part audio documentary about her life story, her schedule of online and in-person events, and as well as how you can support this podcast with your donation. gangaji.org
“I would never suggest that you get rid of the longing. Meet the longing, fall into the longing, and you are laughing, laughing, laughing.” Perhaps you have had an experience of longing that won’t go away no matter how you try to satisfy it or get rid of it. That very desire may actually be pointing to a deeper desire—a longing for truth, for freedom, for resolution. In this episode of Being Yourself, Gangaji shares how we can meet the longing directly and in that recognize the longing is actually you calling yourself home. Learn more about Finding Home, Gangaji's new six-part audio documentary about her life story, her schedule of online and in-person events, and as well as how you can support this podcast with your donation. gangaji.org
“I don’t have confidence in my personality, but I do have absolute, total confidence in the Truth of who I am. And that is available for you because it is the same I Am.”
Quieting or shutting down the voice of self-hatred running in our minds often brings us to the spiritual search, and in that, it can be an ally. We may fear thoughts or feelings of self-hatred, but if we don’t want that merciless voice to rule our lives, we must question it, challenge it, and ultimately meet it directly. In this episode, Gangaji shares her own meeting with self-hatred and her great discovery. Just in this episode: Gangaji joins host Barbara Denempont to introduce this potent monologue from the archives. She also announces a new six-part audio documentary, Finding Home, that traces her journey to realizing true freedom. It will be released in the With Gangaji Media Library on May 5.
Learn more about Gangaji, her schedule, and programs including Finding Home at gangaji.org.
“True inquiry is examining all of those places where you have assigned your identity. One of the spiritual identities is the one who is enlightened now, finally.”
For millennia, human beings from all walks of life have sought after what has been referred to as “enlightenment.” In this potent monologue, Gangaji offers a fresh inquiry into the nature of enlightenment, the trap we fall into when we seek it, and the possibility of recognizing what is more essential than any state of enlightenment and unenlightenment.
Learn more about Gangaji, her schedule of events, and program at gangaji.org
Papaji said, “It takes one twelfth of a second, and then your life is never the same.”
Our spiritual search often begins with a causeless moment of true revelation that stops us in our tracks. In just a split second, what is whole and permanent is immediately recognized. As the powerful feelings, insights and emotions connected to that sublime moment subside, we often begin our search again hoping for the impossible—to repeat that experience. As this exchange demonstrates, inquiry can show us the way out of that mental maze to discover what doesn’t come and go.
Learn more about Gangaji, her calendar of events, and other programs at gangaji.org.
“If you are willing to surrender for a moment any definition of yourself that arises however high or low, you will directly discover what lies underneath.”
Is there a relationship between our self-definitions and the desire to control? What happens when we set aside our definitions, is it freeing or frightening? In this monologue and exchange, Gangaji encourages us to set aside all definitions in a moment of self-inquiry to discover what is free of all definitions—you.
Learn more about Gangaji and her monthly online gatherings and free community video screenings.
“Universal, limitless consciousness has no problem with feeling bad or feeling good.”
When we experience challenging emotions or exacting mental states we may imagine we are “losing our enlightenment.” A day may start with oceanic feelings of bliss, but in the next moment, fear or rage or sadness appear. Are we really losing our enlightenment? What are we overlooking in our quest for the “good feelings?” In this relatable and lively exchange Gangaji imparts the task Papaji gave to her: Find out what doesn’t come and go.
Learn more about Gangaji at gangaji.org
Visit our "Moments" page where we share powerful moments of realization from the global community.
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“Thought is a beautiful power that arises in Awareness. If that power is worshipped or if it is hated, then it grows into a tyranny. You are Awareness, not the thought of Awareness, but the reality of Awareness.”
When we identify with the thoughts and feelings arising in our mind and body, we overlook our true face—awareness itself. Habitually following thoughts with more thoughts is the root of unnecessary suffering. In this monologue, Gangaji shares how it is possible to effortlessly discover that who you are in reality, is free and unthought.
Learn more about Gangaji, her schedule, and programs at gangaji.org
“When you’re willing to be still…to stop this forward thrust of accumulation, of a lifestyle, you can give your life, the attention of your life, to discovering what is life.”
When we begin a search for peace or happiness, we may simply be looking for better circumstances, or wanting to feel less lonely, or hoping to release feelings of guilt or sorrow. As we walk that path we may fall into just another lifestyle or we may discover a much deeper truth—the truth of who we are, consciousness itself. How can we honor that discovery, honor our lives as we live each day? What does it mean to live a true life in the wake of recognizing the truth of who one is?
Learn more about Gangaji's events and programs at gangaji.org
On this Being Yourself Podcast Extra you are invited to "look inward." Take just a few minutes to drop into a brief selection taken from The Sacred Fire of Death: Reflections on the Katha Upanishad. It is the newest installment in the Sacred Text Series with Gangaji and Chris Mohr. Along with their conversation about the Katha Upanishad itself, there are also readings from what is one of the most beloved and sacred texts of India.
The complete 82-minute audio download of The Sacred Fire of Death: Reflections on the Katha Upanishad is available to purchase at Gangaji's online store.
Read an interview with Chris Mohr about the Katha project, In the Waiting Room of Death.
You can also read this short article from Being Yourself host Barbara Denempont, A Taste of the Katha Upanishad.
“There is a possibility of meeting the Satguru which is death – the final great teacher of us all. Not as an escape from life, just an opening to what is inevitable, to what is here.” Genetically, human beings are designed to survive, to avoid death. The fear of death is natural. But when we are willing to consciously meet death, to investigate its depths and reality, we have a life-changing opportunity to shift our attention from our relative existence to the eternal nature of being. Then, we can live our lives from the ground of being, rather than the fear of death. This is the gift of Ramana’s inquiry into “Who dies?”
Learn more about Gangaji and her programs at gangaji.org
“Regardless of those people who depend on you, it is possible for you to be true to who you are. Compassionately, ruthlessly true to who you are. . . true to the open heart.”
The most common question Gangaji receives at the end of a retreat is, “How can I trust myself to be true to the truth of who I am while living my daily life?” How do we raise children, pay the bills, go to work, or sustain a marriage and be true to who we are? Is it really a question of trust? In this episode, Gangaji speaks to what is actually closer, and more essential than trust.
Learn more about Gangaji, her schedule of events, and programs at gangaji.org.
“The mistake is overlooking what is effortlessly, choicelessly, always here.”
How is it that we actually overlook the truth of ourselves? When we pursue sublime states of mind to attain “unity” on our spiritual path, we can go down a path that instead delivers an experience of separation. Gangaji invites us to simply be, and in that, discover what cannot be “done” and who you truly are.
Learn more about Gangaji, her schedule of events, and program for the incarcerated at gangaji.org.
“The secret of freedom is giving up the choice to escape yourself.”
A prison inmate’s letter inspires this month’s podcast. In one of the most loved monologues in the archives, Gangaji speaks of the essential choice to face what has been feared or run from for most of our lives. When we give up any idea of healing and directly experience the woundedness, we discover a deeper truth—the truth of who we are.
Learn more about Gangaji and the Gangaji Foundation Prison Program.
At some point in our lives, we will experience a loss of innocence. Whether that disillusionment is with ourselves, our family, or with life itself, there is a choice that arises in the midst of loss. Will we fall into cynicism and self-betrayal? Or do we meet the pain of that loss directly and in that, discover the innocence that was never lost.
Visit the website to learn more about Gangaji and the Gangaji Foundation Prison Program.
“You are free to discover yourself as Truth. You are free to rest in that Truth. You are free to be happy, regardless of your body, your thoughts, emotions, or circumstances.”
In this month’s podcast, Gangaji begins with a clear exposition on how it is absolutely possible to discover yourself as Truth, no matter your past history. Then in the lively exchange that follows, she speaks to how we deny the truth of ourselves and instead, cling to an identify rooted in our thoughts, emotions, and relative circumstances. Do you dare give up your self-denial?
Learn more about Gangaji, her programs, and event schedule at gangaji.org.
“There is no problem with pain. There is pain. If you are seeking something to avoid pain, that’s the suffering. That’s the search that must be called off.”
It takes effort to avoid our emotional pain. We can try to avoid it, but ultimately the common strategies of withdrawing, protecting, and dissociating from feelings of hurt actually turn emotional pain into unnecessary suffering. This lively exchange taken from the Gangaji archives offers a clear demonstration of how we can recognize the strategies we use and then choose to give up the power to suffer.
Learn more about Gangaji, her in-person and online events, Prison Program, and more at gangaji.org.
To make a donation to support this podcast or other programs that support the recognition of the inherent peace alive in all being and the ending of unnecessary suffering, please visit our giving page.
With gratitude..
“If you stop thinking about how to get out of the body that may be painful or how to keep the body that is pain free, you get to experience the truth.”
Physical pain is an essential aspect of life that serves the survival and well-being of the body, but we can easily turn that necessary pain that alerts us to injury and illness into unnecessary suffering. What is the difference between pain and suffering? What can physical pain reveal to us when we meet it directly?
To learn more about Gangaji visit gangaji.org
Where is the life you want?
As much as we can fear death, we can also fear living a full and vibrant life. In this exchange, Gangaji helps a woman get to the root of what keeps her fear of vibrancy running. This conversation demonstrates how each of us has the capacity to discover how to live a true and full life.
Learn more about Gangaji at gangaji.org
“The strategies and avoidance around the experience of “not being” or death are what keep you from the experience of eternal life.”
As a young boy of 16, Ramana chose to stop running from what he feared and turned to face death directly. In that moment of inquiry, he opened his mind asking, “Who dies?” All of us share that same opportunity to stop running and inquire into what we fear most—the end of “me.” In the willingness to investigate death itself, we can discover what cannot die, we can truly rest in the peace that is present here and now.
Learn more about Gangaji at gangaji.org
“It was a fire. It was really a fire because it was a razor’s edge. All of sudden there are these huge groups. And if I identified even the slightest negatively or positively…I am sliced on this razor I am living on. It was really a necessary fire. I had to be quiet. I had to be still.”
This month we share the soundtrack to a special 30th anniversary video honoring the community of volunteers and donors. The video begins with Gangaji’s first meeting with Papaji in 1990. After Gangaji speaks about her earliest experiences of teaching, we see what unfolded through community efforts in the years that followed. Includes featured music from Jami Sieber, Kirtana, and Amber Terrell.
To watch the video version or learn more about Gangaji and the Gangaji Foundation visit gangaji.org.
Gangaji speaks about the role spiritual practice plays in our lives and invites us to discover what we are practicing when we “get off our cushion and the chanting stops.” What do our spiritual practices give us? What do we hope they will give us? What can they never give us?
Learn more about Gangaji at gangaji.org
“It’s a lie that any thing gives you fulfilling, true, deep joy. Joy is your nature.” We can feel deeply conflicted when following our hearts doesn’t line up with what we or others think we should be doing. When we reach the proverbial and often frightening “fork in the road,” we have a choice to be true to ourselves. Gangaji begins this meeting speaking about the difference between being normal and being natural, and then shares one of the key “fork in the road” moments she experienced in her life. Learn more about Gangaji at gangaji.org
“What our meeting has the capacity to reveal is that there is a reference field that is unthought, that every thought appears in.” How is it possible to be “certain” of who we are? In the wake of an essential and undeniable experience of our true nature as pure consciousness, doubt usually arises—“Did that really happen? Is it real?” Then, we often look to our thoughts for the answer. In this powerful dialogue, Gangaji helps us see past the efforts of the rational, conditioned mind to grasp to the doubtless recognition of what is always here. Learn more about Gangaji, her events, and programs at gangaji.org.
“The error is that you are not what can be thought, or perceived, or felt. You are that in which all thoughts, all perceptions, all feelings, appear in.”
In countless ways, we search for a “better” identity to replace who we think we are. This month, Gangaji speaks to the trap of misidentification. How is it possible to see your true face? Where are you looking for yourself?
Learn more about Gangaji at gangaji.org
“Incarcerated for life in a maximum security prison in Alabama and not using that as an excuse, refusing to use that as an excuse. In fact, using that as a vehicle.”
Gangaji reads a powerful letter of realization from a prisoner serving life without parole in an Alabama prison.
Learn more about Gangaji at gangaji.org
Support/Learn more about the Gangaji Foundation Prison Program here
“This is not psychotherapy. This is not anti-psychotherapy. This has nothing to do with fixing you. This has to do with discovering fully and completely what is always here and was always here in the worst moments, in the best moments.”
In this monologue recorded during a recent retreat at Fallen Leaf Lake, Gangaji delineates the crucial difference between psychotherapy and self-inquiry and the distinct purposes they play in our lives.
Learn more about Gangaji, her programs, and schedule of events at gangaji.org
Donate to the Prison Program here
“This is an invitation to stop. To not create who you are. To simply be yourself with no idea or memory of who or what that is. Just to be. Then to see, how vast this just is.”
Our lived experience in a human body gives rise to a wide range of phenomena that include thoughts, feelings, and images of ourselves. Thoughts, feelings, sensations, or memories are not a problem unless that is how we define or identify who we are. In this potent inquiry, Gangaji points to the complex subtleties of ego that perpetuate human suffering. She invites us to stop overlooking the source of all phenomena to discover our true face and “the absolute simplicity of peace.”
Learn more about how to support prisoners in their spiritual inquiry by donating to the Gangaji's prison program here.
Learn more about Gangaji and all of her events and programs on gangaji.org.
“When you know, without a shadow of a doubt, that you are this stillness, that you are this awareness, then it doesn’t matter what is on the surface.” Human beings have a profound desire to realize a lasting peace. The question is where are we looking, and what desire are we actually chasing? In this very relatable exchange, we see how recurring desires to avoid pain, end confusion, or gain clarity are simply the play of the mind. True and lasting peace remains undisturbed by any phenomena, and we can discover that in our willingness to simply meet what is arising. Learn more about Gangaji and her programs at gangaji.org
“To be nothing, to be nobody, is to realize who you are.” This month on Being Yourself, we share one the first meetings Gangaji held in Byron Bay, Australia. This is the land of the Arakwal Bumberlin people, who have lived in the coastal landscape around the Byron Bay area for at least 22,000 years. Gangaji begins by acknowledging how the ancient Aboriginal peoples have blessed our lives. Then she invites us to end our search for spiritual superiority to simply be who we truly are—no “thing” at all.
Discovering the truth of who you are doesn’t require a certificate of realization. You don’t need to understand Sanskrit or Advaita to know the truth of who you are. The only requirement is the willingness to investigate the thought of who you are. This month on Being Yourself, Gangaji shares what she calls a “sutra from the streets”— a teaching story about the power of inquiry and what is possible for all.
PROGRAM NOTES
Learn more about Gangaji and her programs and events at gangaji.org
Learn more about the Gangaji Foundation Prison Program
Donate to the Prison Program here.
About Gangaji
Like many of her contemporaries, Gangaji searched for fulfillment through relationships, career, motherhood, subculture experiences, political activism, and spiritual practice. In 1990, Gangaji met her teacher, Sri H.W.L. Poonja on the banks of the Ganga River. Today, Gangaji invites people from all walks of life to fully recognize the absolute freedom and unchanging peace that is the truth of one’s being.
She is the author of The Diamond in Your Pocket: Discovering Your True Radiance, Freedom and Resolve: The Living Edge of Surrender, Hidden Treasure: Uncovering the Truth in Your Life Story, and You are That Volume 1 & 11.
About Kenny Johnson
After living behind bars for over 20 years, Kenneth Johnson went through a spiritual awakening that changed his life radically and ended his life as a criminal. Released from prison in 1997, Kenny later founded This Sacred Space, a non-profit organization dedicated to self-discovery. He is the author of The Last Hustle. Kenny@thissacredspace.org or 415-342-4807
This month on Being Yourself, we return to the summer of 1993 in Boulder, Colorado. Gangaji speaks about the opportunity to break the trance of fear by directly experiencing fear itself. “This is a kind of contraction against life. Direct experience is the medicine, the remedy. You really experience fear, and fear is not fear.”
A timeless message from Gangaji as we begin a new year. Plus an invitation to join her for an upcoming online gathering on Saturday, January 7 at 11AM PT. Learn more at gangaji.org.
“For our purpose, which is the purpose of discovering the truth of who one is, let us forget why one is and discover who.”
We often are seeking answers to our questions of “why” and “how.” Gangaji invites us to turn our attention to the most important question we can ask ourselves on the spiritual path, the question that can lead to self-recognition and the endless discovery of the depths of who one truly is.
This month we are happy to share a selection from Jami Sieber and Kim Rosen's new album Feast of Losses. Their new album takes a deep dive into that sacred space where grief and gratitude meet. Their collaboration offers a transmission of such beauty that it stops the mind and opens the heart! This selection from the album features What the Living Do by Marie Howe, with music by Jami Sieber and spoken word by Kim Rosen. Read about their inspiration for this work on the Gangaji Commnuity Blog.
Purchase a download of the complete album at jamisieber.com/feast-of-losses
“If your attention is on the story of how you do not deserve what is being offered, this is the continuation of self-denial. There is an open door in this jail, in this prison.”
When we seek freedom on the spiritual path, it is often freedom from our mind or mental activity. In this podcast, we focus how we can lock ourselves up inside a mental prison, not recognizing the door that is always open.
Repeatedly telling the story of “not good enough” is a familiar habit to most of us, an aspect of our human conditioning. But what does it have to do with who you truly are? In this exchange, Gangaji, simply and directly shares how to bring an end to the story and “step into freedom.”
“To play the role of yourself, which is the transcendent role, the role of freedom, you have to trust something unknowable.”
The themes of belonging, freedom from identification, and trusting our direct experience come together in this month’s podcast. This powerful interplay of themes opens the mind to the heart and invites an inquiry: What does it mean to be free? Where do you belong?
We have been blessed to hear Aea Luz sing at Gangaji's retreats. Now, we are happy to share her beautiful voice with you. This podcast extra features a new song from Aea that was actually inspired while she was on retreat with Gangaji—One Thing Goin' On. It is taken from of her recently released album, Dust & Light available on aealuz.com.
A key strategy for our human survival is to “be special.” If we stand out in some way, get noticed by others, we may find ourselves better positioned in the “herd.” That isn’t necessarily a problem, until the drive to be more and more special becomes an addiction and in that, is ultimately destructive. This lively exchange offers great insight into what it means to be absolutely ordinary and still discover what is truly extraordinary.
“Stop all effort to get whatever it is you think will give you fulfillment. All that is required is one instant of truly stopping.”
The longing for true freedom, for lasting fulfillment is no ordinary desire. Unlike the desires for food, shelter, or social connection that serve our physical survival, true fulfillment cannot be attained, even if we employ spiritual techniques and meditation practices. In this monologue, Gangaji speaks to the resolution of the paradox this extraordinary desire presents in our lives—true fulfillment can only be realized if you don’t do anything for its realization.
In dealing with life’s hardships, we naturally identify what is broken, what emotions need to be controlled, which circumstances need to get better. That is part of the human drive to survive. But there is something beyond brokenness, beyond any emotions we wish would go away. In the willingness to directly meet the pain we fear, rather than trying to control or get rid of it, there is a life-changing discovery of what is whole, complete, and has no need of fixing.
Our most sublime experiences of acceptance, wholeness, and truth, are commonly followed by a fierce “mind attack.” If there is a willingness to investigate what is underneath the experience, there is a revelation of what is untouched in the wake of any mental phenomena.
“All of your life you have wanted to be who you are. That is what authentic means, isn’t it?” Recognizing you are just “faking it” is a moment of discriminating wisdom that reveals an essential choice point. Will you keep faking it? When the desire for the truth of who you are overwhelms every other human desire, the choice becomes clear. In this exchange, Gangaji takes us on a deep dive into the desire for authenticity and the habit of postponement.
Many have taken a spiritual path to escape the pain of human suffering that flows from war and injustice. But the truth is, we are never separate from it all. Where can we discover the strength and the capacity to bear that pain? How can our lives be beacons of true peace?
A new composition from Scott Reich blends Gangaji's spoken word with his music. Listening is an opportunity to drop deeply into the message, "You, yourself, are Home."
If you were totally and completely seen and heard, what would that give you?
As human beings living in relationship to each other, we play many different roles: partner, mother, father, son, daughter, or co-worker. In these roles, we may have the experience of not being seen or feeling invisible. In this inquiry, Gangaji takes us into the direct experience of “not being seen” to discover what is actually not being seen.
“The willingness to be silence is the willingness not to be who you think you are. To not get what you think you need. Not have what you think you have. There is a nakedness in that.” In her latest podcast, Gangaji and interviewer Mark Groves share a compelling conversation about what it means to be still, to stop. How does our fear of silence lead us away from our true self, especially in the midst of our active and often chaotic sensory world. Where do silence and sobriety meet?
“There is some force that is seeking itself. That desires itself. That is praying for itself.”
As we begin a new year, you can take a moment for reflection. You can tell the truth about what you are desiring, what you are hoping for, what you are praying for as you walk on your spiritual path. Sharing her own personal experience, Gangaji also invites you to inquire into the source of your prayers and see what it reveals.
Musician and composer Scott Reich incorporates Gangaji's spoken word into a his new composition entitled "This Space of Stillness."
“I write music to create a place of refuge - for myself, and for all who are drawn to a place of deeper peace.”
“We are here to retreat from the trouble, so that actually when the trouble returns, we have a bigger capacity, a stronger foundation to meet whatever appears.”
When we choose to walk on a spiritual path, our first aspiration may be to transcend our problems or at least transcend the world’s problems. From the mundane to the catastrophic, problems are part of living a human life. So where is peace? What if true fulfillment is realized when we actually stop trying to transcend what Gangaji calls “trouble?”
*“Maybe grace, deliverance comes to get you. Knocks on your door and says, ‘You have a chance to be at peace.’ In your willingness to take that chance, to accept that invitation to be at peace, then you have an opportunity to share this peace, everywhere.”*
Living our daily lives, we may find ourselves actually attracted to war. We can also be fed up with that attraction. We can recognize that there is no need to postpone peace in our own minds. In this podcast, Gangaji speaks about the roots of war and the opportunity of being at peace for ourselves and the world.
The human desire for understanding is powerful. We naturally want to understand where we fit in or how best to fix a problem. Understanding satisfies particular needs in our daily life, but on the spiritual path, is understanding enough? Gangaji addresses the crucial difference between realization and understanding that transforms our life experience.
When we are willing to set aside our beliefs, our thoughts, our powers of mind for an instant, the peace we long for and search for, is immediately revealed. In this lively exchange, Gangaji speaks to the experience of “losing our peace” because some thing has changed, and where finally it is always found.
“You live your life in Truth, you live your life knowing that even though ‘my breath changes, and my feelings change, and my body changes,’ this Peace does not change. It is here, always.”
Perhaps your search for peace and happiness has taken you down many different roads. It may be rooted in a desire for security, spiritual attainments, personal power, or even just an end to feeling afraid. In this monologue, Gangaji shares how it is possible to discover the limitless peace of being that is not subject to our ideas, definitions, or circumstances.
“What this appearance in your consciousness is about, first of all and finally, is to invite you to this space of stillness that is your heart, now.“
Many spiritual seekers hope to realize a “quiet mind” What is actually possible given the stream of thoughts that go through our minds every day? In this month’s podcast, Gangaji speaks to the life-changing opportunity to “overhear your stories” and stop following any thought no matter how elevated or mundane the thought is. BONUS: Gangaji reads a powerful report from a prisoner who is participating in her Freedom Inside course by mail, and has a brief conversation about working with prisoners.
Take a moment to join Gangaji for a short, but revealing inquiry: "What blocks your fulfillment?"
“To be true to the eternal truth of yourself is to ignore nothing.”
Our spiritual discovery of the absolute truth of one’s being can be turned into a hiding place, where we ignore harsh realities and deny the cruelest aspects of our shared humanity. Ignorance is not “bliss.” Rather, it is the root of all suffering. In this powerful monologue delivered in 1999, Gangaji shares that the end of ignorance and our willingness to be all is the “gold of self-realization.”
“The more you are willing to face the helplessness of being human, the more being human is not the problem.”
When we step onto the spiritual path, often we hope to transcend our fears. Our fear of death and loss can drive a lack of compassion and perpetuate our unnecessary suffering. Gangaji encourages us to meet our fear, not avoid it. In a moment of giving up control and simply being undeniably flawed, mortal, and very human, we can rest in the peace of who we are.
The sacred hunger for truth, for God, for love, for peace, for freedom is the force calling us home. This deep longing doesn’t leave us alone. It persists even with a lifetime of disillusionments or “unfulfilled promises.” No matter what spiritual path we have taken or not taken, Gangaji offers all this encouragement: “Let this hunger for Truth have you. It is a glorious feast, and it is time to stop circling the table. You have a place at this feast.”
At its root the desire for control is an infantile thought: “What I want is what I should have.” We do have a limited capacity to control many things within our life circumstances, our relationships, or our emotions. But when we try to control what cannot be controlled, we suffer and cause others to suffer. On this podcast, Gangaji speaks to what that moment of letting go of control really is and what it reveals. She shares it “is the opportunity to realize what doesn't need to be controlled to be free, to be happy, to recognize itself.”
Many take a spiritual path in life with a sincere desire to contribute to the well-being of all sentient beings. In this month’s episode of Being Yourself, a young man asks, “How can I cultivate the heart of a Bodhisattva?” Gangaji speaks to how we can be true to the Bodhisattva heart in the face of our human, cultural, and spiritual conditioning.
We naturally value self-reliance and independence especially in Western culture. Considering our personal survival, the desire to not be dependent on others makes sense, but is it real? In this podcast, Gangaji helps us discover the self we can truly rely on and the self-love that is revealed in that discovery.
“I would like to share with you exactly what I mean when I say self-reliant and how essential it is that you be completely, absolutely, totally self-reliant. First, you have to know what “self” means.”
As the new year approaches, we can to shift our focus from what we think we need to fix, and give our full attention to what is already whole and perfect. In this podcast, Gangaji speaks of the catalyst for a deeper awakening—the willingness to “unlearn” and open to what is fresh, alive, and who you are. Not a concept or memory of who you are, but as a true, living freshness. Also: We share a song in tribute to Amber Terrell.
On the spiritual search we often ask, “What do I have to do?” to find resolution and fulfillment. We look for “masters” of spirituality and enlightenment who we hope will tell us how to behave or will direct us in practices necessary for true happiness. Gangaji makes clear that true resolution can be discovered when you set aside your cosmologies, theologies, and formulas for that which is much, much closer— the truth of who you are.
Since 1990, Gangaji has shared Papaji’s invitation to call off the search. This essential teaching serves our conscious discovery of who we truly are and is profoundly relevant to living our daily lives. In this recording, Gangaji shares a teaching story, written by a sangha member, that is relatable and true. What is discovered when we are willing to completely call off the search and simply let ourselves be found?
“Our minds can be agitated and we can still be aware of what is at peace, regardless of circumstances.” Gangaji speaks to the maturity needed when we are confronted with significant life challenges. It is absolutely possible to live our lives fully as Peace and as human beings with choices. In the midst of the challenges, we may find ourselves in individually and collectively, what is our response? Will we contribute to the “collective angst” or dive ever more deeply, and consciously, into the peace that is always present.
“Finally, integrity means honesty. But honesty is a moving target because of our conditioning. We have to be willing to be humbled in the recognition that what we perceived as being honest or truthful was revealed to be just a conditioned “version" of truth.” When we recognize what we have long overlooked or denied, we can have one of the most valuable experiences a human being can have: to be humbled. In this podcast, Gangaji speaks about the natural integrity and vigilance revealed when we are truly willing to be humbled.
This month our conversation on the subject of racism continues. Taking us more deeply to the underlying fear that is the source of racism, Gangaji speaks about the fear of death and the fear of our own and others’ freedom. Recalling her early life in Mississippi, she shares the moment when her racist conditioning was first challenged and how that awakening set her on the path to discovering true freedom.
This month Gangaji sits down for an interview on the subject of racism. Gangaji grew up in Mississippi, raised a white southern girl in the segregated town of Clarksdale. In this interview, she speaks about how her own racist conditioning first began to be dismantled. She invites us not only to meet the cruelty and wrongs of the past 400 years, but also to meet the internal system of racism within our own minds today. Part One of this interview covers the human patterns of denial, seeking power for survival, meeting the fear that perpetuates racism, and the possibility of serving true freedom for all beings everywhere.
In this historic moment, white people have an opportunity to redress the long, cruel legacy of racism in America. Author Ibram X. Kendi said, “The history of racism is a history of denial.” So that is where we begin with this episode: the resolve to end denial and face hard truths. In this recording from 1998, Gangaji recounts an article about Bishop Desmond Tutu. His commitment to truth and reconciliation in South Africa serves as inspiration to all.
“When you are seeking nothing but truth, and in that seeking you are willing to see everything then closure is by-product. Peace is revealed, harmony is revealed, to be your own self.”—Gangaji
What is revealed when we stay conscious in the midst of great upheaval? When we are willing to inquire with an open mind, we can move beyond simply coping with disaster and discover a life changing truth untouched by any loss. Recorded in March of 2011 following a devastating earthquake and tsunami in Japan, this monologue is relevant to the times we find ourselves in now, confronting a worldwide pandemic.
“In our sophistication as human life forms, in our worldliness, in our psychological astuteness, in our pursuit of happiness, we too often lose the direct experience of the boundlessness of love that is life.”
Mistakenly, we define who we are by the roles we play in the theater we call our lives. Then we further define ourselves with our evaluations of how well or how poorly we play those roles. When Gangaji first met Papaji, he told her to stop everything. In her willingness to stop everything and just be, Gangaji saw past the roles (mother, daughter, spiritual seeker, wife, student) and recognized her true face. It is possible for all of us to recognize our true face—the truth of who we are. Then every role we are given can be played fully and authentically. We can live freely, resting in the truth of who we are.
“When fear is experienced as energy, as feelings, without a story attached to it, without thoughts defining it, when it is not fought or made war with, what is it? What is it in your experience?”
Together we are facing a global pandemic. It is something none of us has ever faced, something that is truly unknown. Naturally fear arises in uncertainty, fear that can lead to panic. How can we meet this moment with our natural intelligence? With the willingness to investigate, to open to the fear we may be experiencing, we can discover what is at the core of fear, what is at the core of what isn’t wanted or desired. In opening to fear, you open to yourself, you open to “what is in the heart of the heart.” Selected from a live online meeting Gangaji held on March 22, 2020, Gangaji responds to questions about the pandemic and guides us in an inquiry.
“Thank God you haven’t been able to escape the dissatisfaction with life as it is prescribed.”—Gangaji
When we are filled with doubt and overwhelm, and all seems to be falling apart, there is the potential through self-inquiry to discover home. This enlivening exchange with Gangaji, recorded in Santa Fe in 1998, demonstrates how in our willingness to fall apart, we ultimately see what falls away and what remains—the home that is real.
Is your inner critic running your life? The inner critic tells us how we are not enough, how we should be more, how we should be better than we think we are. Thinking about what is wrong with us can eat up our lives and ultimately distracts us from the essential truth. In this episode of Being Yourself, Gangaji demonstrates how to confront the inner-critic without judgment, and finally end the war between ego and superego.
Where is your attention? Our minds are designed to recognize what is “wrong” and needs fixing. This aspect of our ego serves our survival as human animals. There is nothing wrong with this aspect of our ego, but if we only look for what is wrong and neglect to honor what is already whole and free, then we suffer unnecessarily. Wherever you find yourself, you can take this moment to shift your attention to what is right: the wonder of existence itself.
"The door is open."
How can you discover freedom and peace exactly where you are right now, in your current circumstances, without changing anything? This month, reading a former prisoner’s letter, Gangaji speaks to the egoic prisons we live our lives in, and how it is possible to recognize the door to freedom that is already open.
We all play many roles in our lives: parent, child, student, seeker, teacher, boss, and many, many more. But what do we want our lives to be used for? In this episode, Gangaji shares her own experience of being in the role of teacher and addresses how the roles we play can serve the deepest truth—the truth of who we are. Also: In a special interview, Hillary Larson, host of A Conversation with Gangaji, tells us about her recent trip to the Amazon rain forest. Along with sharing her own experience of roles ending and beginning, she tells us what her journey to a very far away place revealed about finding home.
What if the last obstacle to discovering true freedom and fulfillment is just a thought? Often hiding in plain sight, our common doubts— “I am stuck,” “I am separate,” “I can’t help it”—are how we create our reality and suffer unnecessarily. In this episode of Being Yourself, Gangaji offers a radical invitation and demonstrates how being aware of what we are actually thinking can open the door to freedom. We all have the capacity to see through our doubting thoughts into the vast simplicity of who I am—freedom itself.
One of the ways we commonly define ourselves is by our “problems.” In this episode of Being Yourself, Gangaji powerfully challenges the assumptions we have about our problems and what it means if we can or cannot find the respective solutions. If we can’t solve our day-to-day problems, does that exclude us from living a free and authentic life? What really is the last obstacle that keeps one from discovering natural fulfillment?
When we let go of our worldly desires, we often replace them with spiritual desires. When we want enlightenment, what is it that we imagine enlightenment will give us? Really? In this podcast Gangaji dares us to set aside all our desires just for one moment, and discover what is already here, completely fulfilled, and awake. “If you have nothing, you only have yourself. When you truly only have yourself, you are awake.”
Chasing success and avoiding failure are natural aspects of our human drive to survive. On the spiritual path, however, ending our struggle with avoiding failure offers a profound realization. This illuminating dialogue between Gangaji and a retreat participant gives us a fresh look at failure, perhaps one you have never considered. Gangaji challenges all of our assumptions and leads us to the recognition of what is deeper than either success or failure ... and is always here.
“Enlightenment at the core is heart opening, and heart opening reveals wisdom. And wisdom is mercy. It’s impossible to be merciful to anyone else if your heart is closed to yourself.”
We continue the investigation into self-hatred with this episode of Being Yourself. Gangaji speaks to the necessity of “kissing the toad” if you truly want to be free of patterns of self-hatred and live a life rooted in self-love.
This month, Gangaji begins an exploration into the many facets of self-hatred. Our first installment in a series begins with the egoic cycle of inflation and deflation. How do we get off this wheel of suffering? We are all familiar with feeling great and feeling horrible, but what does that have to do with who we are? This powerful monologue helps us see how the egoic structure works, and that is possible to stop perpetuating patterns of avoidance and patterns of grasping.
We have looked at how we project onto the so-called “other” and the unnecessary suffering that projection generates. This month, we look at how we relate to ourselves as an object in our own minds, overlooking our true face. Objectification also leads to unhappiness and suffering. In this episode, Gangaji offers the possibility to completely simplify our narratives saying, “The ultimate universal remedy to suffering is I AM.”
Projection is an aspect of our human minds that allows us to survive and to function, but projection can also lead us to suffer unnecessarily in all kinds of relationships and within our our minds. In the extreme, when we project fear and hatred onto the so-called "other", tragically it can manifest into horrendous violence. So what can we do as individuals? In this episode, Gangaji addresses how we end the trance of projection and recognize what is here, now.
In this podcast, we take a look what drives our desire for purpose and consider, what is our deepest purpose. In two powerful exchanges, Gangaji addresses how the deep fear of being nobody, and the search to be a somebody, becomes its own burden.
Gangaji speaks to the essential mistake we make on the spiritual path and offers her own resolution for the new year and beyond. Take a listen to Resolve & Resolution, a loving and passionate monologue taken straight out of the archives...
"Our magical thinking cannot change the universe.It’s really all about trying to change something in ourselves that is waiting to be faced."
In this month's episode of Gangaji's new podcast, Being Yourself, Gangaji challenges our deeply held concepts about hope and hopelessness. Sharing a very personal story she illuminates how hope can become an obstacle in our lives. What if giving up hope could show you a deeper freedom? Would you be willing to let it go?
Being Yourself: Self-Inquiry with Gangaji is the latest addition to Gangaji Podcasts. In this new show, host Barbara Denempont, dives into the treasure trove of Gangaji's recordings to bring you the most relevant, brilliant and meaningful clips from the past 25 years. In this first episode Gangaji explores the very human experience of being separate from God, truth, love, each other and from ourselves.
Six years ago, we started on a journey and we called it A Conversation with Gangaji. The original question was, what if you could sit across the coffee table from Gangaji and ask her anything you wanted? We covered everything from relationships to money to death to sex to suffering to enlightenment. We started the first episode with the topic of chronic pain and ended our last conversation with the question, what do you really want? Together we got to listen to Gangaji always point to the deeper truth of the matter. And when all the questions were finally asked, all it really was about was finding home.
For anyone interested in or committed to a spiritual practice, this exchange with Gangaji is refreshingly clarifying. In her fierce way, Gangaji suggests that the daily mediation that many of us practice largely consists of what it is we want, or don’t want. If that is the more common mantra, then what does it mean to have a spiritual practice? And is a spiritual practice required in order to wake up?
There's a lot of debate, and perhaps some strong opinions, about what it means to take the spiritual bypass. It doesn't necessarily mean addressing every emotion that comes up. But it also doesn't mean pretending everything is fine when it's not. When Gangaji says you don't have to process everything or fix yourself in order to be free, what exactly does that mean? Would you take the bypass in order to be free?
Stevie Leppard had everything anyone could want on the outside, lots of money, fancy cars, a successful career, but on the inside his own self-hatred felt intolerable. Suicide seemed like the only way out. It was grace that would eventually save him, but it was a fierce grace. How Stevie would go on to meet Gangaji is just part of his amazing story.
When hard things in life show up, how do we face the sense of overwhelm that threatens to take us into a spin? Is living a spiritual life ultimately about the hope of avoiding sliding into some sort of abyss? In this repeat episode, Gangaji invites us to inspect whether or not our thoughts about hell are actually different than the experience itself. Rather than giving up, can the challenges in our lives actually be a call to wake up?
What does your life stand for? What do you really want? If the answer is freedom then what does that look like? Does the answer you come up with match your life, how you live your life? Is there something you’re holding onto that keeps you from truly realizing what it means to be free? These are potent questions. And what happens in this particular exchange with Gangaji is different because it is the beginning and end of all conversations.
It was the middle of the night. Harriet Watson was driving down a dark, snow covered road alone, barely able to see what was in front of her. Suddenly, she was startled by a loud thud. In the moments that followed, her life would change forever. From the frustration of a life a rigid rules and beliefs to the experience of profound freedom, this story is a testament to the trustworthiness of life.
With rare exceptions, human beings are innately good. Being in alignment with that goodness feels spacious. We can be greedy, cranky, critical, jealous, but being good? Now that’s seems like an infinitely better way to go. The problem is that being good can be a trap unto itself. Does our capacity for a deeper awaking rely on our willingness to cultivate this goodness within us? Or are we inherently good, without doing a thing?
Control might ultimately be an attempt to fend off our deepest fears. It can show up in all sorts of ways in our everyday lives. It can interfere with relationships. It can also be exhausting. Some people are self-described “control freaks”. For others, control can show up in more subtle ways. Fessing up to our control issues is a pretty tender thing, but when the source of it is finally met, the possibilities are endless.
Just in time for November, we're revisiting a episode we did a while back on the subject of gratitude. There are so many gems in this one. Sometimes when we don't feel especially grateful, we feel as though we should, as if feeling ungrateful is something we should avoid. That's just a jumping off place for one of our favorite conversations.
When trauma happens, it can change the trajectory of a life. It can color how we see the world around us. We can retreat. We can act out. And we can certainly spend our lives running from it, managing it or even trying to heal it. How do we come to terms with even the deepest of wounds without suffering from the identification as someone who has been hurt or wronged in some way? This episode takes a surprising turn and is one of the most revealing conversations so far.
When you see Kim Rosen on stage performing poetry, she exudes a distinct sense of certainty. But the truth is that for a period of her life she suffered from a particular type of fear that was profoundly painful. Her prayer to be released from it's confines would be answered two different times. And both times that grace came in the form of a poem. In the end, Kim’s story wasn’t about making her fear go away. It was about meeting it and doing life anyway, in a most extraordinary way.
The next episode of Epiphany features Kim Rosen. Her story will make you believe in the power of courage. Coming up on September 20th.
Gangaji has always said that inquiry isn't theoretical, it's about real life. This episode is a perfect example of that. Gangaji experienced a serious injury recently. She's going to give us an update, but we're also going to take this as an opportunity to continue our conversation on the body. Difficult things happen to people, no matter their level their awareness, so how does that play out with someone like Gangaji? How do we face our fear of losing when unexpected things happen in life? Gangaji addresses all of the above, and more, on this new episode of Gangaji Radio.
The body is the first way we're identified in this world. It's our unique gateway to experiencing sound, touch, seeing beautiful things, and it's a way we connect with each other. But in times of pain or challenging emotions, being in a body can seem like a burden. If we could just fix it, make it look the way we want it to, then maybe we would be liberated. The question is, do we ask too much of these bodies of ours? This month, Gangaji explores both the bliss and the existential crisis of being in a body.
Kenny Johnson was trapped in a life that seemed impossible to escape. You could call it a kind of hell. He spent more than twenty years in prison, sometimes just fighting for his life. What he wanted was just to be free. What happened to him was beyond his wildest imagination. This month's epiphany story is about amazing grace. It's about discovering light in the darkest of places.
Preview our next Epiphany episode, The Last Hustle. Kenny Johnson spent over twenty years in prison. What he wanted was to be free. What he got was something he could have never imagined. Coming up May 17th.
It's easy to experience silence or stillness in the midst of deep meditation or in a moment of appreciating the beauty in the world. But what about the times when we're upset or angry? How about the times when our sense of well being is swept up in whirlwind of fear or sadness? How do we know that who we really are is silence and why is it important? We'll also be talking about difference between space and spaciousness, where intelligent thought comes from, and much more.
A lot has been said about the subjects of karma, fate and destiny. Is the course of our lives predetermined? How is it that some people seem to live a life of abundance while others face huge difficulties? Most of us have probably experienced a bit of both. Is it possible to change our karma? What is the difference between choice and choicelessness? In this episode Gangaji also shares her thoughts on responsibility and the power we have over our karma.
In October of 1998, a talented musician named Craig Johnson, along with millions around the world, was rocked to his core by the brutal murder of Matthew Shepard. It was a hate crime, a hate crime against gays. In the years that followed Matthew Shepard's death, although they never met, he and Craig would become brothers in the deepest sense. At the core of Craig's story is the question, is love present in the midst of the unthinkable?
Coming up this month on Epiphany Grammy Award winning musician Craig Hella Johnson takes us on a journey that began with the 1998 murder of Matthew Shepard. It asks the question, can love be found in the midst of the unthinkable? Look for it on February 15th.
The bubble of me is made up of my body, my thoughts, my worries, as well as my hopes, dreams and desires. In and of itself, it's neither good nor bad. It's just part of being human. But sometimes there can be a preoccupation with this bubble of me, which perhaps is a distraction from a deeper anxiety. In this conversation, Gangaji also looks at the bubbles we create around our political, social or spiritual beliefs. Is it important to reach beyond our own bubbles? And if so, how do we do that?
When we feel back into a corner, asking for help can be seem difficult. In fact, it can be sort of an act of courage to do it. In those moments when we call out for help, if we let go of what that might look like, is there a guarantee that our prayer's will be be answered? What about other categories of help, like giving help? When does offering help serve and when does it interfere? When is it actually a distraction? When we move beyond our daily hopes and fears, is there a final prayer just to be free?
Mica Carew comes from a long lineage of medicine women. Her
grandmother taught her that if you quiet the mind you can hear another
person's body. From the age of nine, that's the medicine she practiced. In her twenties, she turned her back on her native medicine. It was a sincere and desperate prayer for help that took her on a journey she never could have imagined.
To say that the US presidential election of 2016 has created a firestorm around the world would be an understatement. While some people are happy with the outcome, the election of Donald Trump has left many shocked, angry and in fear of the future. In this special episode, Gangaji responds to some of the questions and reactions that have naturally come to the surface. Do we have the capacity to bear the fallout from this, no matter what side we're on? Important questions for the sobering times we find ourselves in. Some of us feel blindsided. Where do we go from here?
It's easy to think that a sudden and profound awakening has more meaning than more subtle awarenesses that happen over time. It's like a thunderbolt versus an onion. It's natural to want to compare the two but the question is, are those comparisons worthwhile? Could it be that it's ordinary moments that are the true openings to realizing who we are? Could these moments be the final call for us to stop trying to fix ourselves and realize what has been here all along?
To bring our conversation from August's episode, When We Disagree, full circle, we've included this special bonus clip. This monologue from Gangaji's compilation Being in Peace shows us where war originates from within ourselves and how it is then projected out into the world. In this lucky lifetime, Gangaji points to this rare opportunity to call off this war on ourselves and finally be at peace.
Pro-choice, pro-life, pro-guns, anti-guns, racism, immigration, sexuality, financial equality, the debate around different social and political issues that have stirred a heated debate for many. What if our disagreements lead to hate, even if our hate is a result to those who say hateful things? Who's right and who's wrong? What happens if we throw away the requirement that we have to agree with each other at all? In the midst of these heated emotions and passionate opinions, is there room for love and respect?
At first glance, giving up hope doesn't seem like the best idea. After all, isn't hope what helps us make it through difficult times? We hope for good health, financial stability and fulfilling relationships. We hope for a life without suffering, where our most sincere wishes can come true. What would life be without hope? If we didn't have hope would we risk falling into some sort of abyss? Is hope what keeps us afloat or is it actually something that contributes to our suffering? This month, we're looking at the surprising obstacle that hope can create, as we discover what is possible if we are willing to let it go.
All of our iTunes subscribers are in for a treat this month as we share with you a special advanced preview of the next podcast that we hope to add to Gangaji Radio. The inspiration for the show is to connect all of us through our own teaching stories. Sharing these remarkable personal stories, Epiphany brings to life the profound impact our “aha moments” have, not only on our own lives but on everyone around us, including people we may never even meet. Your help will not only allow us to launch this important new offering, but it will also support the continuation of A Conversation with Gangaji. This pilot episode, Teachings from Grief, is about love, loss and courage, and what is possible when they all come together.
Shame is probably one of the most avoided words in the English language. And no wonder. It seems dark and sticky and secretive by it's very nature. Shame can arise from anything from abuse to sex to doing something we feel embarrassed about to simply being in a human body. The story of shame can wind its way through every part of our lives. What happens when we finally stop to face our own experience of shame? The answer could be both liberating and life-changing.
Have you ever looked in the mirror and thought you looked too fat or too thin? Does the way you feel in your body ever seem frustrating or even intolerable? This month Gangaji is joined by author Geneen Roth. She is known by millions by her New York Times #1 Bestseller Women, Food and God. Together they get at the root of this sometimes painful relationship we have between our self-worth, what we look like and our relationship with food.
There's Ram Dass saying that goes, if you think you're enlightened then go spend a week with your family. Family relationships can evoke the most explosive emotions. A certain kind of remark or tone can come from anyone else and mean nothing, but with family, in an instant, we feel like we're ten years old again. The bonds that began in our earliest memories of childhood have the power to influence how we relate to life in general...who we marry, what we do for a living, where we live. The question is...Can we all just get along? And.....do we even need to?
We will all lose someone we love in the course of a lifetime. There will be that moment when we face the stark reality that we will never be able to touch or hear or be with that person ever again. It is in those moments when grief surges to the surface, using all its force to gain our attention. If we fully meet this grief, is it possible to discover something that we may have not known before? Some may ask where people go after they die because they seem gone, but is that really true?
If you enter the word “spirituality” as a google search, you'll come up with about 145 million results. Clearly there's an abundance of blogs, youtubes, retreats, etc. to help us on our spiritual journey. But if you find one person who changes your life in profound and unmistakable ways, do you keep searching or does finding that teacher, once and for all, end your search? What is the difference between taking advantage of a plethora of offerings or overindulging? When it comes to finding a teacher, are you in an open or a committed relationship?
The right book or person or opportunity shows up at just the right time. You meet someone unexpectedly who says just want you needed to hear. What are these moments of synchronicity? Are they just coincidence? Or has your intention or desire attracted these things that have somehow shown up in your life? Is there something beyond manifestation? If the peace and fulfillment we are looking for are available to us any time by inquiring inward then what is the role of positive thinking and synchronicity?
It's often said that if one is certain of the love that lies within oneself the choice to be in a relationship or to be single is freed up. In that, relationships are no longer centered around insecurity and identification. Some people feel better when they're in relationships, but that's not entirely a good thing if they're rooted in dependency. Some people are more accustomed to being single, but what if that's not by choice? And what about the feeling of loneliness we sometimes feel no matter who we're with? This month, we're asking, what does it mean to be alone?
When it comes to relationships, fear of abandonment can lead to all sorts of forms of self-betrayal. In trying to manage this very human fear, we can sometimes ignore our own knowing, all in the name of not being left. Ironically, these subtle or not so subtle attempts to escape being rejected actually results in our own abandonment. Telling the truth about ways we betray ourselves is ultimately liberating, but what do we do when we are betrayed by the person we are in a relationship with?
Gangaji shares her own experience when it comes to this inner and outer betrayal.
This month, we're looking at the subject of love and attachment. What is the difference between the two? We can love a partner, a parent, a child, a pet, a teacher. But what happens when we're attached to the object of our love? Does this attachment keep us from experiencing something we don't want to face, or is it the vehicle that helps us discover what love truly is? In reality, how much control do we have over what or who we love? Whether you're in a relationship, hoping for one or if you find relationships difficult, this conversation is for everyone has ever experienced love.
He is a hip hop artist whose words and music have provided a message of clarity, optimism and peace to millions. For over 25 years, she has pointed us to freedom by inviting us to look deeper than our thoughts. What happens when two people from very different backgrounds come together to talk about skin color? This month, Prince Ea sits down with Gangaji for a special feature of A Conversation with Gangaji. Where does racism come from? How do we face the truth about our own prejudices? In these turbulent times, is it possible to transcend our differences?
How many times have we been betrayed by a lover, a friend, a family member or an institution? How many times have we witnessed others being treated unfairly, people we care about or even people we don't even know? And what about the state of the planet? Perhaps it's built into us as humans to want justice. And that's not necessarily a bad thing. But when we get caught up in this desire to remedy unfairness, what is it that we're actually looking for? What is the deeper question when it comes to our search for justice?
Have you ever asked what it means to just be yourself? The answer to that might seem easy, but maybe not. Have you ever thought to yourself, I'm not quite myself today. What does that mean? Maybe you feel like you have to be a certain person depending on different situations. Are you your sex, the different roles you play in life, your successes and failures? For some us, we can be so practiced at who we think we should be that the question of being our true selves can be surprisingly perplexing. It could also be the most important questions we can ask. What does it mean to be yourself?
Aging is sometimes called the great humbler. Some embrace it. Some dread it. But most of us vacillate between the loving the good parts and resisting the reality that our bodies and brains have a limited shelf life. What does that mean for our quality of life? Aging is an involuntary invitation to seeing how we are attached to who we want to be and where we are afraid to let go. But if we shift our attention in a certain way we might find our ideas about aging aren't quite as concrete as we thought.
When a strong emotion like anger or fear or sadness pops up there seems to be an automatic impulse to get rid of it, or at least to try and manage it. It's as if these feelings of ours are something dangerous, something that might overwhelm us, or at the very least, something that interferes with our lives. Is there a way to transcend these emotions of ours? What if we choose not to do anything with them? Is giving up the habit of trying to escape them a doorway to liberation?
Sometimes there seems to be a little competition that goes on within ourselves between confidence and doubt. I'm good at this, but not so good at that. I'm smart. I'm attractive. I'm able. But sometimes it feels like I'm not. If doubt is nothing more than a bad habit and confidence is fleeting and somewhat superficial, then what's deeper, more trustworthy than both of those things? Is there a place within all of us that is rooted in a certainty that transcends both confidence and doubt? And if so, how do we find it?
It's irritating at the very least, someone assumes what you're thinking or feeling, or what you need to do. Perhaps you have someone in your life right now who is just certain they know what is true for you. In an extreme way, perhaps it's even an abusive relationship. Do we ignore their projections? Do we not take them personally? Do we stay or do we go? If we find that projections in general aren't ultimately based in reality then how do we find solid ground when it comes to relationships?
How many times have we been triggered by friends, co-workers, family members or acquaintances in some way that seems separate from us? Perhaps we've found them controlling, needy, critical, arrogant or self-absorbed. Are they simply displaying difficult parts of their personalities or are they are mirroring back to us some part of ourselves we'd rather not see? Projections and assumptions cause all kinds of trouble in relationships. Getting at the root of them can open up all sorts of possibilities.
The sense of freedom and intimacy that happens by the sheer willingness to be vulnerable can be life-changing, somethings in ways we could never have expected. It takes courage to let down our defenses and expose the ways we feel wrong or afraid or embarrassed. But what about the times we are caught off guard, when we are put on the spot in ways that are not by our own choice? This month, Gangaji looks at voluntary and involuntary vulnerability and what role they play in living a fuller life. How can the willingness to be exposed put an end to suffering?
Alanis Morissette is known by million by the way she so rawly communicates the human experience through her songs. But over the years, she's also been willing to share her spiritual journey with all of us. In this very special episode of A Conversation with Gangaji Alanis Morissette talks to Gangaji about success and failure, the difference between pain and suffering, and the deeper meaning of living life dedicated to the truth.
When we really stop and look at our lives there's a lot to be grateful for, even when it doesn't appear to be obvious. What's also true is that gratitude comes and goes. For some, gratitude seems to come easily. Does that have to do with one's upbringing or are some people just born that way? And is it okay if we don't feel grateful at times? How does one experience gratitude when life feels hard? Rather than seeking it, is gratitude possibly part of the fabric of who we truly are?
Our question this month is: What do we do when we are faced with the unthinkable? Perhaps it comes in the form of a difficult diagnosis, the loss of a job, the death of a loved one, or just witnessing man's inhumanity to man. How do we find a sense of love and peace when what we are experiencing feels like struggle? How do we know when to hang on and when to let go? And do people who have had profound spiritual awakenings experience difficulty differently than others? Gangaji's answer to that question is both surprising and humbling.
In our everyday lives, we have ideas about what we like, what we dislike. We notice moments when we've made a mistake. But there's another voice that whispers in our ear. It's the voice of the critic. It's the judge. Gangaji refers to it as the super ego. It's the task master who speaks with the authority of God. It tells us we should be better, smarter, happier. It's like a club that we not only beat ourselves with, we also inflict this voice on others, whether it be outwardly or in our own heads. The question is, how do we put down the stick of the super ego, this God voice, and live our lives in peace?
Perhaps it is something that every human being experiences at some point in the course of a lifetime, even if it's only once, even if it goes unrecognized. Gangaji refers to it as “the essential experience”. It's a moment when any identity with ourselves as a set of feelings, thoughts or circumstances is somehow absent. It can happen in nature, in the midst of a trauma or even when nothing in particular is happening. For some people this “essential experience” ignites a call to a bigger life. But the desire for it can also perpetuate the search for what is already here.
In April of 1990, Gangaji (then Antoinette Varner) could never have imagined how drastically her life was about change when she met her teacher, H.W.L Poonja (Papaji), on the banks of the Ganges river in India. She also would never begin to imagine the number of lives that would be changed as a result of that meeting. Taken from the previously unreleased pilot interview of A Conversation with Gangaji done back in 2011, Gangaji describes one of her most profound moments of awakening and the impact it had on her daily life. At the core, this conversation allows us to see what is possible in our own lives.
In a world where being in control and looking good are often equated with success and stability telling the truth can be a very daunting thing to do. It requires the willingness to expose sadness, anger or fear. It is the courage to admit to the times we have betrayed ourselves and those around us. Although it can be painful, it is also hugely liberating. But is there more than the feeling of freedom that comes with telling what Gangaji refers to as the “relative” truth? Is there an ultimate truth? Beyond any concept, what exactly is the truth?