SzeWing Vetault Podcast: Recent Episodes
SzeWing Vetault
Parenting is a challenging task, and this week we have Carmel Ecker with us to discuss ways to minimise drama in our relationships, change our mindset, and modelling self-care for our children. If you want to feel more empowered as a parent, this interview will be super useful and fun to listen to or watch!
Carmel Ecker is a single parent empowerment coach, she is also the Managing Director of eWomenNetwork, Victoria British Columbia chapter. You can find more information about her work and programs at https://speaknowcoaching.com/
Interview Highlights
1 - Introduction to Carmel Ecker; single parent empowerment coach and managing director of eWomenNetwork (00.03)
2 - An image makeover on the idea of what it is to be a single parent; limitations of negative stereotypes (02.42)
3 - Perspective; reframing your outlook before becoming a single parent, letting go of past expectations (06.57)
4 - Dealing with guilt as a single parent; the importance of self-care for single parents (11.56)
5 - Self-care cont. Modelling self-care to our children, demonstrating healthy behaviours (15.08)
6 - Five elements of Carmel's framework; mindset, creating a vision, motivation, creating habits, making a commitment (17.40)
7 - Emotional contagion; consciously changing your mood in order to affect others around you positively (22.40)
8 - How to minimise drama in interpersonal relationships; focusing on your own reactions, thoughts, feelings and positive decision-making (27.31)
Video
https://youtu.be/AFbL1vRH4x8
Transcript
Sze Wing: 00:03 Hi, everyone. Today I have a lovely guest with me, and today we've got Carmel Ecker. She's all the way from British Colombia, in Canada. And she's joining us today for this podcast, and I'm really happy to have a chat with her. So little, short introduction; Carmel is a single parent empowerment coach. She's also the managing director for eWomenNetwork, Victoria, BC chapter. And that's basically how we met online. There's a lot of online meeting going on, since I'm based in Sydney, Australia. I'm really excited to interview her. And I'm certain that she's going to share a lot of information that's going to help a lot of single parents out there. I think one of the things I loved the most when I was looking up her work is that, you know, she talks about how to switch from a survival mode to be a thriving parent, which we all need; whether a single parent, double parent, or just a woman, you know, you want to you depart from that survival mode and really live a more thriving life. And it's not easy, but there's a lot of tools and guides out there. So hopefully today's podcast interview will shed some light on that. I also love the fact that the work she's doing is making people feel, you don't have to do it all alone. You have mentors, you have people who have been there. And I think that support network is amazing and it's really wonderful. So with a welcome to my podcast, Carmel.
Carmel: 01:40 Hi. Thank you so much for having me. I'm excited to be here.
Sze Wing: 01:44 Yeah, me too. So I guess first of all, I'm not a single parent, but I have friends; I have heard a lot of stories. I know it's not easy, especially at the beginning you know, the change and everything. So I don't have firsthand experience, but I do friends and people that I know. So your work is about empowering and coaching single parent to change that, when we talk about the survival mode thing, and also to defy the stereotypes, you know, almost like having image make over to be more empowered, to be happy to be successful. So it sounds really amazing, but for some people, it sounds almost too good to be true. So tell us a bit about your discovery journey and also, how do you encourage people to take the step and to believe that's actually possible?
Carmel: 02:42 Yeah. Wow. Okay. That's a big question. But really you know - and I love the word that you used there; image makeover beca...
In this episode, I talked to Marlene Cameron, a business leadership and life coach, about the effect and importance of clarity for performance, productivity, and profitability. We also discussed the importance of intuition and the benefits of stepping away from overthinking and allowing creativity to emerge.
Marlene Cameron is a Business Leadership and Life Coach, she is also a speaker and trainer. She has been training, coaching and mentoring business owners, executives and mental health professionals since 2002. She had a successful career in interior design, then as a business owner, management consultant and financial analyst. She has an MBA and CFA as well as all her coaching qualifications. She now works with entrepreneurs and leaders to discover the clarity to be more calm, certain and connected.
Highlights
1 - Introducing Marlene Cameron; trainer, coach. mentor. (00.25)
2 - Qualifications; why successful women feel pressure to collect credentials; imposter syndrome, self-doubt. (02.56)
3 - Controlling your feelings through thought; breaking habits and changing thought patterns (09.13)
4 - Importance of being present; morning rituals, clearing your mind and discouraging unhelpful thought patterns (13.21)
5 - The clarity effect model; Dense fog, partly cloudy, light haze, blue sky clarity (16.32)
6 - Decision clarity advantage; the three components. MRI, IOU, FIT; using your intuition to create space for fresh ideas. (23.55)
7 - Discussion on the importance of intuition; the benefits of stepping away from overthinking, allowing creativity to emerge (29.44)
If you would like to connect with Marlene and find out more about her coaching, please visit: www.marlenecameron.com
Video
https://youtu.be/7dU_Y2iPplI
News from Coach Sze Wing Vetault
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Our next in-person event is the Wonder Women Full-day Masterclass at Sydney Darling Harbour on 11th June 2022. If you would like to create more meaningful success without more exhaustion and frustration, please join us for this fun event! For more details, please go to our events page.
empowerwomen #femininewisdom #womensuccess
Transcript
Sze Wing : 00:03 Hi, everyone. Really happy to be back doing this episode of the podcast with you all. And today I have another overseas guest. Today we've got Marlene Cameron, and she's a business, leadership and life coach, and she's also a speaker and trainer. So first of all, welcome to my show.
Marlene: 00:22 Thank you. I'm delighted to be here.
Sze Wing : 00:25 Fantastic to have you here. Now, very quick introduction. So first of all, Marlene, she has been training, coaching and mentoring business owners, executives, and mental health professionals since 2002. So she has been around for bit, and she had a successful career in interior design, then as a business owner, management consultant and financial analysts. So, wow, a lot of different qualifications here. So we are going to talk about how all that becomes, you know, the path she's on right now. She has an MBA and CFA, as well as all her coaching qualifications. She now works with entrepreneurs and leaders to discover the clarity, to be more calm, certain and connected. So that's a very short introduction. I'm sure you have more to share with us, but, first of all, welcome. And I know that this is a very cold day where you are, compared to Australia. So I always love the fact that we can do this over such long distance and also be able to hear very different people's perspectives. So, yeah, very warm welcome to you.
Marlene: 01:41 Thank you again.
Sze Wing : 01:42 And so I think the first question I had when I was preparing for this interview is that nowadays we hear a lot of women, very successful women, they have a bunch of credentials like yourself, right? So we heard the MBA,
A woman's worth is such an important topic. I know many women who are so comfortable in giving, helping and nurturing others. But when it comes to receiving, for example, asking for a promotion, pay rise or even accepting a straight-up compliment, they may find it uneasy. When we are not open to receiving, we are playing small. A woman's worth is not measured by how much we sacrifice, but oddly enough, it has something to do with how open we are to receive and to shine.
About our guest Dr Kelly Schuh
Dr Kelly Schuh is a Worth & Wealth Alchemist for female coaches, consultants, and visionaries. She is the “Sales Whisperer”, an Amazon Bestselling Author, Speaker and Yahoo! Finance Top Biz Coach in 2021. In 2009 she pioneered the sacred sisterhood of Pink Tent International (now over 14,000 strong), the first women’s online community of its kind. Her body of work has been featured on Jamie Fox’s Foxxhold Radio, PopSugar Magazine, Fox31TV, Channel 2 and many other media outlets.
Interview Highlights
1 - Introducing Dr Kelly Schuh, outlining credentials as a best selling author, speaker and business coach. (00.39)
2 - Defining 'Queen of Worth', helping women find their inner worth; the importance of self-worth in business (02.48)
3 - Masculine versus feminine; combining spirituality and strategy to achieve success (10.36)
4 - Relating the idea of receiving to money and worth; practising gratitude and shifting focus (14.35)
5 - Human Design Chart - combining four ancient traditions to help women. tap into intuition; applying this to business decisions (20.18)
6 - Aligning the brain with the body; transitioning from chiropractic to coaching (25.37)
7 - Flexibility in working style; one-on-one versus teams versus solopreneurs (26.46)
8 - Balancing movement and stillness; the importance of downtime for productivity (36.53)
If you want to find out more about Dr Kelly Schuh's work, please connect with her via:
Facebook: Queen of Worth™SisterhoodInstagram: Worth & Wealth Alchemist™ (@drkellyschuh)LinkedIn: Dr. Kelly Martin Schuh | LinkedInYoutube: Worth International - YouTube
Video
https://youtu.be/ehi6pT97Pcs
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Interview Transcript
Sze Wing : 00:02 Hi, everyone. I'm really, really excited to finally talk to one of my - I don't know how to put it - favorite guests that I really wanted to interview for a long time today. We have Dr. Kelly Schuh with us. And so obviously she's not in Australia, although I think she has clients in Australia, but we met a while back and I just connected with her and I really wanted her to come onto my podcast interview. So here we go. We have Dr. Kelly today. Welcome.
Dr. Kelly Schuh...: 00:35 Thank you. Hello. Hello.
Sze Wing : 00:39 So, first of all, let me do a very quick introduction for my audience, who may not have heard of Dr. Kelly Schuh -but actually many of you may have know her if you have been around. I mean, especially with women in business, online business you may have actually heard her, or heard her speak, or maybe even went to one of her programs before. So, her introduction; Dr. Kelly Schuh is a worth and wealth alchemist for female coaches, consultants, and visionaries. She's the sales whisperer and Amazon bestselling author, speaker, and Yahoo Finance top biz coach for 2021. So that's a really great thing. In 2009 she pioneered a sacred sisterhood of Pink Tent International; now over 14,000 strong; the first women's online community of its kind. Her body of work has been featured on so many media outlet like Jamie...
If COVID has taught me anything, I would say it has highlighted my value and need for connection with my family and friends. My parents live in Hong Kong and my mum was planning to come for the birth of my youngest son nearly two years ago. Then the pandemic forced all international borders to close. Now we are just hoping we could see my parents later this year, or maybe early next year. With all that in mind, when I heard about Robyn's work, especially her Musings and Memoirs Storytelling Production for aging loved ones, I had to interview her for this podcast, so that people can consider using this service to capture loved one's stories for the family.
About Robyn Pearson
Robyn Pearson is the owner and founder of A Friend Indeed. She is passionate about supporting adult children who are in a caregiver role to their aging parents. Over the past 11 years of service, she has spoken with numerous daughters and sons, each one admitting that it's a big role to take on alongside the many other responsibilities they juggle. A Friend Indeed brings engagement, purpose, joy and a little "goofyness" to increase the quality of life for their aging loved one and to ease the pressure off the family so it doesn't feel like everything has to be all on their shoulders. On-site visits with their aging loved one residing at home, in a care facility, or even awaiting placement. Robyn's business is serving Calgary, Airdrie, Didsbury and areas within Alberta, Canada.
The pandemic had interrupted their in-person visits back in 2020-2021, while they are back to their in-person visits, they have also developed an additional way of supporting the family they serve and engaging their aging loved one! Musings & Memoirs is a Video Storytelling Production made to capture their aging loved ones’ stories, as told by them to become a precious and memorable keepsake for the family now and for future generations!
Interview Highlights
Introducing Robyn Pearson, owner and founder of 'A Friend Indeed' (00.14)Outline of the key functions of A Friend Indeed; including caring for ageing loved ones in care facilities, hospitals. (03.18)Medical v non-medical care; the importance of social, mental and emotional wellbeing & quality of life (05.14)Communication and follow up; putting family members of ageing loved ones at ease (07.36)Tailoring care and engaging with clients with diverse needs; non-verbal, clients with dementia (10.40)Personal anecdote and example of A Friend Indeed's personalised service (14.07)The importance of incorporating joy and creativity in client care; client and family perspective (17.13)Emphasising family communication and the impact of visit summaries for geographically distant relatives (22.58)An introduction of 'Musings and Memoirs' during the COVID-19 pandemic and ensuing restrictions; a digital storytelling service. (28.32)
If you would like to find out more about Robyn Pearson's work, please visit: www.getafriendindeed.com
If you want to learn more about our NEW Wonder Women Coaching Program and how it can help you create more meaningful success, please visit: https://szewingvetault.com
You can now book a FREE 30 mins. Discovery Call with Coach SzeWing Vetault here.
For notebooks, weekly planners and other products by Sze Wing Vetault, please visit her online Oh-My-Goddess Store.
You can buy my book Goddess with Many Faces on Amazon.com.au or Amazon.com
Video
https://youtu.be/PuV98Il7h7E
Transcript
Sze Wing: 00:02 Hi, everyone. I am really, really happy today to be talking to Robyn Pearson; a new friend all the way from Canada Alberta area. Hi, Robyn.
Robyn: 00:13 Hello.
Sze Wing: 00:14 So today we are going to do this podcast, which I think is a little bit different than usual, because a lot of times I interview relatives or business owners that are doing coaching services or something in that area. But today, Robyn comes from a very different specialty and you can tell she is ...
Many successful people consider lifelong learning a key habit for their success. This includes both work-related skills that can improve your employability and other skills and interests that can enrich your life. Nowadays, there are so many flexible ways to learn, as virtual learning has been growing and advancing exponentially in the last few years. You may be interested in adding an online course to your business or at your workplace, or perhaps you may want to know more about how to choose the right learning course for you.
For this week’s podcast, I got an interview with Jessica Pare, who is an expert in helping coaches and consultants to create online courses, programs and memberships. Among many things we talked about, we highlighted ways to encourage action from the learners so that they can learn better and the key things to include in a course to support the best learning experience. Also, we talked about how to make the courses more successful in the business sense.
About Jessica Pare:
Jessica Pare is the Founder and Chief Learning Alchemist of Alchemy Learning Solutions. It is a company that is on a mission to help more people and organisations access the wisdom that can enable them to thrive. They help coaches and consultants to Create Done-With-You Courses, Programs & Memberships.
Jess has a background in the personal growth and development field, training as a coach, and has expertise in instructional design. She provides clients with the structure, accountability, and support to bring their vision into reality through a hands-on approach that helps them avoid overwhelm and create content that has the impact they desire on their clients and their business.
If you would like to connect with Jessica Pare, please visit the Alchemy Learning Solutions website.
Highlights:
Introduction to Jessica Pare; the founder and Chief Learning Alchemist of Alchemy Learning Solutions (00.12)
What is the function of Alchemy Learning Solutions; providing structure, accountability and support (01.22)
Three components to encourage action from the learner; reinforcing belief/letting go of self-sabotage, setting examples, creating opportunity for practice (08.55)
The importance of the hybrid model; including social community, follow up and support (15:31)
Why a learning community is important; emotional benefits for the learner, staying motivated (17.08)
Benefits of the hybrid model versus evergreen courses for the course creator; up-selling, repeat clientele (19.32)
Market research; identifying pain points and problems of the ideal client, to pinpoint when learners are most in need of follow up (23.37)
What sets Alchemy Learning Solutions apart from other services (26:02)
Video
https://youtu.be/sSSM6nImgqg
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Transcript
Sze Wing : 00:02 Hi, everyone. I'm really happy today. I've got Jess Pare with me. I think it's Jessica, but I think everybody calls you Jess, right?
Jessica: 00:11 That's right.
Sze Wing : 00:12 And she's also again, an overseas guest; which I love to interview people outside of Australia. She's the founder and Chief Learning Alchemist of Alchemy Learning Solutions. It's a company that is on a mission to help more people and organizations to access the wisdom that can enable them to thrive. They help coaches, consultants to create done-with-you, courses, programs, and memberships. So, Jess has a background in personal growth and development field, training as a coach and has expertise in instructional design. So, it's really a no brainer really, for me; working with other instructional designers before it's, like,
Yesterday as we celebrated International Women's Day, I was just thinking about how far we've come.
More than ever, women have more opportunities to shine, but at the same time, we may have more expectations of ourselves to accomplish, and re-defining what is "good enough" or even a new standard of being perfect.
The inner critic becomes louder and we keep pushing harder to succeed. Now, somewhere along the way, we will hit a bump, or say the COVID or now the floods. When things don't go as planned, we may feel like losing control or dropping our confidence about who we are and what we do.
This episode is to explore how do we nurture self-acceptance, build self-confidence and break the cycle of "never-ending-self-improvement" so that we can create sustainable success, have clarity of what actually matters and enjoy being who we are.
Highlights
How to create a balance between pushing forward and pulling back
Why self-acceptance matters and how it relates to confidence
Confidence can be learned and built
Lean in, have confidence in the universe
If you have been pushing hard, yet not getting the results you want, or you just got burnout and frustrated, you may want to change your approach and lean into your feminine wisdom instead. You can now schedule a complimentary 30 mins discovery call to see if I can help you move forward or scale back in order to succeed! Feeling curious? Just click this link to book it in!
Transcript
(00:23):
Welcome to my new episode of podcast of Sze Wing Vetault. It has been crazy a few months and as you all know about it, that, you know, has been crazy a few years. In fact, we had the bushfire, we have the pandemic and now all the floods and rain in New South Wales and Queensland Australia. So it hasn't been easy for many people and but I'm back doing episodes of my podcast. And I really picked this special occasion today to record this for you because yesterday we celebrated the international women's day and my friends at Soul Advisor is talking about confidence this month. And I am really feel drawn to share what I have experienced, as well as working with my clients these days related to women's success and confidence. So I think one of the things that really struck me for the last few years, more and more so is that we are often on this wheel of achieving more, becoming more, creating more, especially with women that, well, look now we have given opportunities.
(01:34):
We have lot more different ways to express ourselves. So there is this urge as well as opportunity to perform and to shine, which is fantastic. But sometimes when we are really working and pursuing that dream, the downside will be it. You just never stop ending. We constantly trying to achieve and improve. And this can turn into a game of never ending self improvement, where, you know, not only you want a successful career, meaningful relationships that you need to eat well and use eco-friendly products and meditate and exercise, like, you know, there's quite a lot to be a perfect human being. And these days there's, it seems like that goal post also keep moving forward and forward and forward. And then sometimes we, we are just too tired and busy and sometimes just things don't turn out our way. We felt like I wasn't good enough.
(02:34):
You see that contrast of we are given opportunity, but the same time the pursuing becomes such a big drive, but at times we may not get what we want. Maybe not now, maybe not two months, maybe it's not the right thing, so many reasons, but so often we take it upon ourselves saying that I need to try harder. So you become more exhausted or, you know, to keep pushing. It becomes something that could actually have detrimental effect on our health, on our emotional, physical health. But one thing, I also think that it will also hurt our self-belief, but whether we are good enough, whether we can do it and also the confidence piece.
With the current pandemic and changes in our economy, many people are looking at other ways to create multiple streams of income by starting their businesses. Or perhaps you just had enough from your day job and want to pursue your heart-centred, purpose-driven business venture. Whatever your trigger or reason is, most people will become solo-entrepreneurs by utilising their skills and experience to begin with. This podcast episode with Tammy Johnston will help you to plan and transition from a full-time job to self-employment, or if you already took the leap to become self-employed, we shared some tips and reasons that you don't have to do it all alone.
Tammy Johnston is a speaker, educator, business and author. Tammy specializes in helping small business owners and solopreneurs since 2003. She is a noted small business expert on the stage, in the classroom and in media outlets for the better part of two decades.
If you want to find out more about Tammy Johnston work, please visit https://ksabusiness.ca
She is starting a new program called Kick Start 2022, for those who are thinking about starting a business or have recently taken the leap and want to shorten the learning curve and get you to become profitable faster. You can click on this link to find out more and to register: https://ksabusiness.ca/kickstart2022/
I am not an affiliate or paid promoter for Tammy's business, I recommend her work because she is simply awesome, super down to earth, no BS and a highly supportive coach and colleague! :-) Check out her new program!
Interview Highlights:
Tammy's personal story of becoming a solopreneur while pregnantWhat would Tammy say to her younger self - the Do's and Don'ts when starting a businessHow to joggle between a young family and starting or growing a businessWhy we need a board of directors or a tribe trusted people to support our business journeyThe habit of Kaizen3 Keys on successful business planning
Video
https://youtu.be/D6qdnucuiUY
Transcript
Sze Wing (00:03):
Hi, everyone. I'm super excited to interview Tammy Johnson today. She's my dear guest all the way from Canada. I love to interview people from different time zones. So this has got to be a really fun interview because I love chatting with Tammy and I just have to start this interview otherwise, we're just going to go on all day. But I think today it's going to be really great podcast because I know during this current pandemic and changes in our economy, a lot of people are looking at other ways to make money or create multiple streams of income. And not surprisingly many people look at starting their own business or taking their skills and experience into bringing it in terms of making a product or service into the world. So a lot of people are thinking, can they adapt? Can they transition? So I think Tammy's story and expertise can really help a lot of small business owners or want to start people to have a think and maybe take some notes about this.
Sze Wing (01:02):
So I really hope this is going to be a useful interview for a lot of those people, but also it's going to be lots of fun. So a little short introduction, Tammy is a speaker educator business owner and author. She specialized in helping small business owners and solo-preneurs since 2003. And she's a small business expert on the stage in the classroom and in the media outlet for two decades. So she definitely got the experience and when she started out, she had small kids, actually babies. So for those who are moms like myself, we also going to learn from Tammy in terms of how to balance it all. I mean, balance is a kind of like a dream state, but how to do it all, like without going insane, I think. I also think this is a great opportunity too, for some existing small business owner who wants to turn things around or speed up your journey for success, or like brand new people who want to really start off on the right food.
For women who want-it-all: success in your business or career, fulfilling relationships, family, and health. But you don't want to be burnout in order to get there. Perhaps you are have experienced plenty of success in life, but not sure what you are NOT seeing and unsure how to up your game. This is the podcast interview episode that will give you ideas about creating your own success rituals, setting your expectations and boundaries right. Embrace your own cycle, rhythms, and strategy that works for you.
Erin Acton is a certified life and business coach, digital media pro and former broadcast journalist. She is also the founder of the Act On It Success Institute. Erin helps time-starved entrepreneurs take action and take back control so they can rock their businesses.
Interview Highlights
From Want-it-all (career, relationships and family) to burn out, and the path that leads Erin into coachingPeople often under estimate that when you start your business, you may trade in the 9 to 5 for an even longer hours day because it is your own business.Instead of thinking about work or business in a linear fashion, as human, we live in cycles, whether or not we are aware. Spring time is when ideas sprout, a new project may come along, while winter feels very different. It is about completion, inward reflection, or rest.Understand our own unique cycle and rhythmsInstead of constant hustle and keep moving the goal forward for more and more, we could approach creating success that works for youAsking for help is a sign of strength, not weaknessSetting boundaries and aligned with realistic expectationsBe aware of what is a task versus what is a project when it comes to your To-Do ListsSuccess Ritual and find out what is right for you
If you would like to learn more about Erin Acton, her coaching and program of work, please visit: https://www.erinacton.com/
Video
https://youtu.be/w_cWKqZpkaU
Transcript
Sze Wing (00:03):
Hi everyone. I'm really excited to introduce you to my guest this week. We got Erin Acton today and she is all the way from Canada. And I love interviewing people across different time zones in common just to make it really hard. No (kidding!), But I love that, with technology. It’s just so nice to be able to reach people from very different, area and around the globe, but also obviously a different experience. And then the same time you find something in common. So welcome to my show, Erin!
Erin (00:38):
Thank you so much for having me. I totally agree. We've got so many more like so many more things in common. I've just found everyone I've spoken to. So yeah, I'm so happy to be here. Thanks for having me
Sze Wing (00:50):
So a little introduction about Erin. So obviously she's a very smart, successful, modern, I don't know how to describe it because I also know you have young daughters. So in a way, it's really, I think for a lot of us, striving to become someone who have your own career, but also have a family have it or in balance. So that's why I'm also partly so interested in interview people like yourself, because I think a lot of us want to achieve that. And so hearing all the tips and experience will be wonderful, but anyway, introduction, so Erin is a certified life and business coach, digital media pro, and former broadcast journalist. She's also the founder of Act On It at Success Institute and Erin helps time starve entrepreneur take action and take back control so they can work the business and I guess have a fantastic life. She is also previous the managing director of the Victoria chapter of eWomen Network in Canada. So that's actually how I met . Erin. And so I'm really excited to interview her today.
Sze Wing (02:08):
So first of all, I think I want to ask you, I guess we've kind of lean into it a little bit because we talk about a lot of us like women who are listening, they are in the twenties, thirties or forties,
We heard a lot about the importance of self-care, but what I've noticed in my coaching world is that caregivers are great at providing care and kindness to others, but they often underestimate how much they also need support for themselves as well. They bear the fatigue and stress until they reach the point where they are burnt out or feeling overwhelmed. That's why when I met Bill Cohen, I immediately know we need to do this podcast, so that people who are caregivers, especially those who care for family members who have dementia, can get the information that they need to better manage their care and understand there is support available for them too!
Bill Cohen is the founder of Cohen Caregiving Support Consultants LLC. He is a certified senior advisor based in Oregon but he also provides support and other resources online.
If you would like to connect to Bill, please visit his website or look up his support group on Facebook.
Interview Highlights
How Bill becomes a caregiver consultantWhy caregivers need care and support - more than we think we knowAfter 3 careers, how destiny leads Bill to find his new passion and purpose Signs of potential dementia or Alzheimer'sWhat kind of support Bill and his team provide - the holistic model of care and other resources Why do people feel reluctant to get help and support? What happens next when a caregiver finds support to manage the care and other important matters
If you like this podcast interview, please subscribe to my podcast on iTunes or Spotify or any podcast platforms! I appreciate your support!
Video
https://youtu.be/Y8KMdHqW8x8
Transcript
Sze Wing (00:02):
Hi everyone. Today, I have a special guest. So you know many of you realized I've mostly interviewed women on my show, but today I have a very special guest. I met Bill (William) Cohen at an E-Women Network event, actually. He would tell you why that happens, why would meet there? But I was really taken by Bill's words and friendliness, and he was really willing to share his knowledge. And I think it's going to be a great interview. So a little short introduction because I think I'm going to let Bill to tell you the story, right? So, he's the founder of Cohen Caregiving Support Consultants. He is a certified senior advisor based in Oregon, but obviously nowadays, you know, most businesses provide support online. But I think today we are going to pick his brain literally, and also have a conversation about, I think the field of carers and support, because I think this is something we overlooked quite a lot. So welcome to my show Bill.
Bill (01:07):
Thank you. And good morning to you. Good afternoon here in the states, at least on the Pacific coast, and I'm excited, very honoured to be here as one of your rare male guest.
Sze Wing (01:19):
I think you're the second, or it's that rare, because it just happens that, you know, on our show I often talk about tips and tricks to help women to improve their productivity, lifestyle, and talk about goddess and all the things for women in focus. And actually there are times that I think it's really great to have perspective and knowledge from the men and after meeting you. I thought I would jump into this opportunity and as you look at the background (on-screen), we can see that Bill is providing Alzheimer's and dementia support specifically. So obviously the first question totally makes sense is to ask you about your origin story. What lead you to create this business of supporting other carers?
Bill (02:12):
Thanks for asking. So I think the best way to say it is this, if you would ask me about 17 or so years ago, what was going to transpire and that I'd be sitting here today and talking to you and doing what I do, I'd say you were crazy because you couldn't make up this scenario. It just was too unfathomable because I'm living in Oregon. My mom lived in Biloxi, Mississippi, and notice I don't talk like a southerner,
In this interview with Yvonne Winkler, the CEO of Lotus Consulting, we hear an uncommon story of a young girl who fled from oppression to freedom. Then, as a young woman, how she left a highly regarded job to discover true fulfilment on her own terms and to become the woman she is today. We talked about how "starting over" requires courage, trust and the ability to let go of the securities we believe in. A common thread we found in our stories is that when you trust your heart and act from your inner feminine wisdom, the rest will work out the way it needs to.
She said, “Freedom is found within, not outside of yourself.” This is so true. You can travel the entire world, but you can still feel trapped from within.
I love doing podcast interviews because I see the value in sharing these conversations about hope, courage and inspiration. I also believe in collaborations with other women. As Yvonne mentioned, women really understand the value of collaboration, and this is how we can move forward as a society.
Yvonne Winkler is the CEO of Lotus Consulting, Founder of the Freedom Seeker Community and Former Managing Director Alberta Chapters with one of the largest and widely recognised premier business networking organisations, eWomen Network. With over 18 years of business development, consulting and marketing experience, Yvonne coaches women to find the clarity they want and harness the strength they already have to live a life they choose.
You can find out more about Yvonne Winkler, her work and coaching programs on http://www.yvonnewinkler.com/
Interview Highlights
From oppression to freedom - Leaving communist East Germany to the West Germany in 1989
Starting over in a new world twice- adjusting to capitalism, different mindset and a whole new circumstance in West Germany and then Canada 5 years later
The experience of different oppressions and how to use that experience to build a business and support women on their journey
Why it is so important to discover what our heart really wants, not what others want for us or expect of us
How common it is to feel something is missing or unfulfilled despite having a great job and all
No one else is going to find out what will fulfil us, we have to find out what they are ourselves
The idea of the Lotus Wellness was born in Spain during a year-long trip, to create a sacred space where people can recover from their trauma, to unpack their stories and to heal. It may not be what it is today, but that was the start of the idea and vision.
The reason why women tend to play safe, the fear of not being good enough or losing what they have
Why it is easy to forget the connection we have with our inner feminine wisdom, and how we need to re-connect to that source of power
No one is broken and we don’t need to be fixed, but it may be a call for change and courage
When we change nothing, nothing changes
There is no over night success, we all need to start somewhere, just start from where you are
Freedom Seeker Community is a place for women to feel we belong, to feel safe, to open up from their vulnerability and to share experiences.
Video
https://youtu.be/pri0G2qMAUg
Transcript
Sze Wing (00:03):
Hi everyone today, I have a new guest. Her name is Yvonne Winkler, and she is all the way from Canada, British Columbia. And so again, we have this across time zone love affair, and finally, we got connected and we are doing this podcast. So a little background about Yvonne and first of all, she's the CEO of Lotus consulting, founder of the Freedom Secret Community and managing director of Alberta chapter of one of the largest, widely recognized premier business network organization, E Women Network. She used to be the managing director, but now she has moved on to her next chapter, which is lovely. We will find out more next. Anyways, so she had over 18 years of business development consulting and marketing experience.
Starting over is never easy, but it is always necessary if we want to change or grow in our lives. I had a conversation with Cindy Drummond, the author of Reflections of the Dating Pool, about her journey to start over after a shocking discovery and the road to support other women. Cindy is also the creator of Women Only Weekend (WOW) events and co-host of Words of Wisdom online gatherings.
Part of her journey was about "start before you are ready" where she went on 50 dates in a year in search of love. She turned those dates into learning lessons and part of her healing process. Eventually, it becomes her book with words of wisdom about loneliness, the importance of finding a tribe and how she fell in love again...with herself. Cindy lives in Canada and is now married to her loving husband.
Interview Highlights
Background story and how she "start over"
From a healing process to writing her first book
Why 50 dates and what she learned from that experience
Dating takes courage, compassion and tenacity but it also brings opportunities to fall in love with ourselves and others
3 tips for navigating the challenges when we "start over" in any areas
Word of Wisdom gatherings - why it is so powerful for women to connect and share stories
If you would like to find out more about Cindy, her book and in-person and online gatherings, please go to her website CindyDrummond.ca
Video
https://youtu.be/_zwAZIJZw1s
Transcript
Sze Wing (00:03):
Hi everyone. Today I have Cindy Drummond to connect with me here on this podcast or video if you are watching on YouTube. So I'm really excited. She's all the way from Calgary Canada. So welcome Cindy.
Cindy (00:19):
Oh, thank you so much. I'm very excited to talk to you today. Yes.
Sze Wing (00:23):
So a little introduction. So Cindy is an author. Her book is called "Reflection From The Dating Pool" and she had a very interesting story to tell us regarding the book. She has a fascinating story and obviously a truly empowered woman. She's also the co-host of a Sunday souls gathering, and I love it. So, because this gathering is Words of Wisdom and she also run this really amazing weekend gathering or retreat, whatever you want to call it, for women called Women Only Weekend, which I would love to attend, but obviously it's in Canada and we're in locked down in Sydney, so I can only dream. But what I find is so amazing and why I really want to talk to Cindy today is that she obviously had gone through some things in her life. But she managed to really come out strong and now running these events that, I feel we are very needed to connect with other women to empower each other, to listen to each other's stories. So I'm really excited to interview her today and I hope her story and wisdom and advice can also help our listeners. Welcome to my show.
Cindy (01:46):
Thank you.
Sze Wing (01:47):
So, first of all, for those that don't know, actually now I'm recording during a mid-morning in Sydney, Australia, but it's 7:00 PM like evening time for Cindy, but she's still enjoying daylight. So we are very envious as it's pretty cold. So I think first of all, I really want you to tell us a little bit about yourself, your background story, so to speak, let that lead you to write your book "Reflections from the Dating Pool". So yeah. Tell us a bit more about it.
Cindy (02:20):
Thank you. Well, so where do I start? I guess I didn't plan on writing a book. I always sorta thought about writing stories. That was interesting to me, but I didn't have, I didn't have a topic to write about. I was just living my life. I was busy raising my children in my thirties and early forties and men. I went through like many people. I went through a traumatic time in my life. And even then, I didn't know I was writing a book. I was just trying to get myself through the experience, but as I was doing that, I was making notes and I was journaling and I thought ...
Do you know there are now over two million podcasts on iTunes, as compared to about one million in 2020? That goes without saying that it is one of the fastest-growing media content formats.
A podcast is often long interviews that offer the opportunity to show your personality and expertise, while a blog has only a few hundred or a couple thousand words. Not only it offers the time to explore, explain and expand on a topic, the conversation in a podcast often goes deeper as it progresses and since it can’t be fully scripted, it flows organically and may even have a few surprises.
My interview this week is with Mary Chan, the creator of Organised Sound Productions, a Podcast Strategist and Voice-Coach. She has over 20 years of experience in the radio business as a Commercial Producer and a Voice-Over Artist. Mary is based in Victoria, BC, Canada. Mary said "A podcast is essentially an extension of your brand or business." and I completely agree with her. It helps me to connect with my audience in a more personal way and it is always fun to share a conversation that can uplift, inspire or inform others who are listening.
Interview Highlights
Why your voice is the No. 1 instrument you have For audio books, should you use your voice or get a narrator?Audio book and podcast are great marketing channelsHow to better connect with your audience with your voiceEmotion and passion in your voice is a key factor to attract your audience to pay attention Why is it important to discover your true voice by uncovering your past“Code switching” emulating the speech depends on who you are talking toWhat to consider if you want to start a podcast, the basics and fundamentalsPodcast discoverability on Google With Google podcast manager, you can look up what people are searching for when they click "play" on your podcast.Content, Transcript, AI and how to rank higher on Google with your podcastUsing podcast transcripts to pull quotes or use it to put together a bookOr reversely, record a chapter of your book and share it on podcast as a marketing toolThe future of podcast, monetisation, endorsement and more
If you would like to connect with Marh Chan, please visit her website www.organizedsound.ca
Video
https://youtu.be/ZZJ7U8uEAM0
Transcript
Sze Wing (00:03):
Hello, everyone. I am so excited to introduce you, Mary Chan who is today's guest. So so I met her through a women network and actually she's over in Canada. I'm really honoured to have her today as my guest for this podcast. A little short introduction on Mary Chan. She is the creator of Organized Sound Productions. She is a podcast strategist and voice coach. She has over 20 years of experience in the radio business as a commercial producer and a voice over artist. So you will hear it for sure. And Mary is based in Victoria, BC, Canada. So welcome to my show Mary!
Mary (00:47):
Thank you, Sze Wing. This is so great. We can finally connect. Yes!
Sze Wing (00:52):
And so obviously podcast is such a hot topic these days, so I'm really excited to ask you. I've got a bunch of questions, but first of all, I wanted to ask you, so on your website, you mentioned that your voice is your number one instrument. Can you elaborate on that? What do you really mean by that? And when you say instrument, it felt like, you know, when you practice it'll probably get better, but sometimes we just say, oh God, I have a terrible voice. So what then?
Mary (01:20):
Yeah. So what I mean about your number one instrument is you are always talking, selling yourself, meeting people, networking, whatever it may be, your voice is the thing that carries with you, wherever you go, whether you know, you are actually trying to make a sale in a business sense, or if you're just meeting someone new for the first time, even, you know, talking with other parents when you're dropping your kids off at school or something like that, right? It's your instrument,
There are certain things in life we may take for granted. For many of us, breathing is one of those things. We see that as an automatic and instinctive mechanism, but there is so much more to it. If we breathe more fully and efficiently, it can enhance our health and sense of well-being.
In my conversation with Deborah Rubin, we talked about how we both fell in love at first sight with yoga, and we also discussed our view on life purpose, soul contract and how to enjoy our evolving life journey.
Deborah Rubin is a certified Wellness Educator, Therapeutic Yoga Teacher, Buteyko Breathing Educator, Meditation Instructor, Workshop Leader, Speaker, and designer of the Clarity Process. For over 48 years, Yoga asanas (postures), pranayama (breathing) and meditation have been an integral part of Deborah’s lifestyle. She has also created, owned and operated several successful businesses over the years.
Interview Highlights
Different aspects of yoga, the physical one (Asana) is just one of many and there are many benefits associated with the mental and spiritual aspects of our well-being.
How Deborah found yoga (and fell in love with it) in South Africa while travelling - it was following an inner calling - and since then she has been practicing yoga for 48 years!
Yoga affects our whole being, body and mind, as well as spirituality and it even leads us into better understanding our life or soul purpose.
How do we use our gifts and talents in relation to not only to yourself but to others - how do we really make the world a better place on all levels?
We are all spirit having a human experience. We have a soul contract and evolving purposes.
Different stages or phases in life have a theme - if we watch our circumstances, stories and lessons in each stage, we will see the themes and who we are, really.
Samskara - one way to look at this is like an old habit that doesn't serve you anymore. For example, an old belief such as "I am not good enough and I need to be perfect".
How do we know if we are on the right path to living out our purpose? When we are in flow, it is easier to feel it is right, but when we are challenged, how can we discern if it just a test, or we need to change the course?
The Clarity Process - a two-way dialogue with specific questions that will inform the deeper meaning of the conversation and to help us get the answer. It is a highly intuitive process.
Sometimes we may be afraid of our inner voice, because we need to take responsibility once we know. Therefore a deep conversation with someone who can help us discover our truth and it is also important to be heard.
Breathing is the most important thing we do, but often we don't do it fully and efficiently, self-awareness and small tweaks can make a big different to enhance our health and sense of well-being.
Breathing with mouth open and panting a lot may actually exacerbate some stress responses. So breath through your nose and keep your mouth closed.
Nitric oxide is very important, and it is released in the nasal cavity. When we breathe in the nitric oxide, it opens up blood vessels, and it helps to distribute the air to our throat and lungs.
If you're breathing really shallowly, you're probably breathing and creating distress because the nose is connected with the lower lung. It is connected with the parasympathetic nervous system, which is that rest and digest and being cool and calm. Breathing through the mouth and breathing through the upper chest is more about the sympathetic, which is more about fight or flight and energy and get up and go. There has to be a balance.
Our breath is constantly telling us a story. If we just check in twice a day and breath through our nose, it will improve our breathing mechanism as we become more aware and practised.
If you would like to find out more about Deborah's work, please visit her website:
https://deborahrubin.ca/
Video
https://youtu.
For the last few years, I have been observing the moon cycles and my energy flow in order to plan my work and life more strategically. I have talked about that specifically on how to improve productivity, creativity and vitality in my previous episode. However, it is only recently that I dove into Astrology as I found myself became more aware of the impact of planetary movement on my internal emotions and external circumstances. As a result, I got Lisa Jones to read my Birth Chart and learned more about Evolutionary Astrology. I now realised that how my Sun, Moon and Rising signs have contributed to my nature of living in balance and my deep need to express creativity. Since then, I haven't stopped learning and implementing what I've learned from this highly spiritual and practical modality.
My conversation with Lisa went beyond the zodiac signs or horoscope. It was like a conversation about our soul. We talked about using Evolutionary Astrology as a tool to look at our innate blueprint, life purpose, circumstances or traits we are born with and how to best navigate our life path. Famed psychiatrist Carl Jung was an astrologer and father of Archetypal Psychology. This is such a rich and fascinating field and I hope this conversation will get you curious and want to find out more.
About Lisa
Lisa is a passionate Astrologer, Teacher, Counsellor and Australian Bush Flower Practitioner. She has a lifetime love of Astrology and related modalities. Amongst some of her training, Lisa has completed qualifications through Astrosynthesis, (Melbourne), Master Level through Steven Forrest's Astrology program, has a diploma in Counselling and advanced certificates with Australian Bush Flower Therapy. Lisa is the Australian Representative for The Organisation of Professional Astrologers (OPA) and a member of The Federation of Australian Astrologers (FAA). You can find out more about her work, offerings and events at:
http://www.aquariusrising.net.au/
Interview Highlight
What can astrology tell us?
The misconception about Astrology is not just about the horoscope predictions but it has a lot more to do with mathematics, psychology, planetary movements and spirituality.
Using Astrology as a profound way of working with the soul.
Understand the North and South Nodal Axis of our birth chart.
How free will work with our birth chart How can we live strategically, with the understanding of our birth chart and Astrology.
Cultivate self-awareness, the sense of self-worth and being true to yourself What is the difference between the astrology we normally hear about and evolutionary astrology?
How our soul has chosen specifically the sun or moon and all the planetary influence for us to learn what we have to learn, or to complete or to experience our fullest potential.
A conversation with our soul - looking at the birth chart is like sending an invitation for a deeper conversation
Astrologically, what else is in store for the rest of 2021 - both globally and on a more personal level?
Video
https://youtu.be/TdvnCiGW-30
Transcript
Sze Wing (00:03):
Hi everyone. I'm really excited today. We have a different guest, as in, you know, I don't think I had any astrologer on my podcast before, so today I'm really excited to have Lisa with us. She has been for a very long time in this field. And I'm going to share her introduction and background in just a little bit, but I just wanted to say I met her not too long ago, and there's so much to learn from her and I'm totally in love with astrology and how we can use it wisely in our life. I'm super excited to have Lisa with us today. Welcome to my show.
Lisa (00:44):
Well, it's lovely. I'm happy. Thank you. I'm very happy to here.
Sze Wing (00:49):
A little bit of introduction about Lisa. She's a passionate astrologer, a teacher counsellor in Australia and Bush flower practitioner. She's a lifetime lover of astrology and related modalit...
Years ago, I read a book about how to use Feng Shui to improve the energy flow, including how to call new romances in life. I thought to myself, why not? It would be a pleasant change to rearrange some furniture in my bedroom and to add a few new decors too. Indeed, not long after that, I got into a new relationship. You can imagine how thrilling it was for me when I interviewed Patricia Lohan, an international Feng Shui Expert, to hear her saying that was what she did to meet her now-husband as well!
In our interview, we talked about some basic principles of Feng Shui, fun facts and simple ways to improve the energy of your home. Some of the most common hot topics are how to use Feng Shui to allow more money to come through and to nurture better relationships. We also talked about the idea of the Yin and Yang part of a home and how to balance and harmonize the energy to better suit our lives.
About Patricia Lohan:
Patricia Lohan is a Feng Shui Expert, Speaker and Author. Patricia is the creator of PowerHouse Feng Shui and Author of The Happy Home: A Guide To Creating A Happy, Healthy, Wealthy Life. She helps entrepreneurs make their homes & businesses magnetic to money, luck and blessings. She has helped thousands of people across the globe embrace Feng Shui and creates lasting changes in their businesses, homes and lives. Patricia has been featured in media around the world including The New York Time, CNN, Fox, Forbes, The New York Post, She Knows, Essence, Mind Body Green, USA Today and Elephant Journal.
Summary
Background story on how she got into learning and using Feng Shui to "call-in" (or attract) her husband
How to access the energy and to align with our intention, in order to call in our dreams
One way to describe what Feng Shui is to say it is like acupuncture for your home, it is about harmonising the five elements to balance and neutralise your home.
There are many schools and philosophies, complex and even contradicting information about Feng Shui out there
When your house feels balanced and happy, you can feel it. It's a synergistic relationship.
Some Dos and Don't and basic principle for practicing Feng Shui for your home
To raise energy for your home: Appreciation, Fresh Eyes Approach and tune in around your environment. Reimagine your house and connect with things differently.
Animals, pets, insects and nature around your home, they carry its own symbolism, it also depends on how you feel about them.
Yin and Yang. Yin time is very introverted, so perhaps for bedroom (or in my case, study) may prefer a bit darker or position in the yin part of the house. While the living room is the yang side where everyone lives and spends time so brighter colours or have more light or sun ray.
Look at decorations or painting, how do they make you feel, what abstract ideas or symbology do they carry?
Four personality types for every house (see quiz here - patricialohan.com/quiz) - find out whether your house is supported or not for money and relationship. Ultimately, Feng Shui translated to good health and good harvest. Some houses are good for both, others can be good for one and not the other.
Every house is unique. You can look at all the different energies in every part of your home. There are always ways to improve the energy with the five elements, like adding plant or earth element, etc.
Putting the growth mindset into Feng Shui your home.
What to consider when in it comes to relationships and romance
How to use Feng Shui to allow more money to come in, for example, think about the front door being the mouth of the house.
If you would like to connect with Patricia or find out more about her work, please visit: www.patricialohan.com
Video
https://youtu.be/qYTC6qAlfkw
Transcript
Sze Wing:Hi, everyone. I'm super excited today to introduce you to my new guest. Her name is Patricia Lohan and she's a Feng Shui expert, speaker, and author.
Last year, I had the pleasure of participating in a Goddess Circle, which was also a Circle Dialogue. Since then, I have been a firm believer that this ancient practice is one of the best ways to create a safe space for meaningful conversations.
Therefore, when I met Ame-Lia Tamburrini, the founder and principal of Hum Consulting, who facilities and teaches about Circle Dialogue, I leapt into the opportunity to interview her for my podcast. For many years, Ame-Lia has been engaging with indigenous communities and corporations to discuss challenging and critical issues that are highly divisive in their communities. Hum Consulting was born out of that interest and aims to create more harmony, unity and momentum in communities, one conversation at a time.
I love it when she said, "Circle Dialogue is not just about forming a decision, but it is also about having experiences to feel more connected to one another." This is exactly what we don't get enough of these days!
There are many ways of using a Circle Dialogue. We can use it to be heard and to share, or for leadership development and growth, or for communities to use for reconciliation. The circle represents how we are all interconnected and to practice empathetic listening. We get to unmask ourselves or let go of the social expectations to just be ourselves and open our hearts.
When you sit in a circle, one of the guiding principles is that only one person can talk at a time. A talking stick or totem will be passed around in a circle and so everyone will get their turn, but until then, it is all about listening and holding the space in respect for the speaking person.
If you would like to connect with Ame-Lia Tamburrini or find out more about her work, please visit Hum Consulting.
Interview Highlights
Depends on how we engage, we can end up becoming more divided or connected.How to turn a conversation around or avoid starting on the wrong footCreating space and time for people to get beneath their positions. Think about what are the core needs to be addressed, e.g. to belong, to feel safe and to be seen. If there is no space in the conversation for that, people focus on their positions and we won't get very far with that conversation.
Three core principles
Intention - Setting our own Intention before stepping into the dialogue. What is that I want to create or contribute to?
Curiosity - It helps to open our hearts to create space to listen differently, instead of being full of anticipation or even shut down before going in.
Take Responsibility - Our life experiences are the result of our thoughts. We need to take responsibility for our thoughts and feelings.
We all want to be liked, but we cannot control how others think of us or what they do, but we can choose how we are going to respond or react.Many indigenous communities use circles for ceremony, for governance, for celebration and restorative justice as well.Instead of asking What's wrong with that person, ask what is his/her story?Blaming and shaming may be an easy way out, but it doesn't solve the underlying problem.The many ways of using circle dialogue e.g. goddess circle - for women to be heard and to share, or for leadership and growth, or for communities to use for reconciliation.The circle represents how we are all interconnected and to practice empathetic listening. We get to unmask ourselves or let go of the social expectations to just be ourselves and open our hearts. It is a safe space especially for women.Other important use for a circle dialogue can be restorative justice for youth regarding bullying or for celebrations to deepen our inter-connectiveness.Dialogue circle is great for introvert because only one person can speak at one time with the talking piece passing around, so the person who speaks can really get heard and have the space for respect.Self-awareness and practice are key to a become a good circle dialogue host
Video
https://youtu.
Today's podcast and video feature Part II of my Honouring Your Divine Feminine Wisdom: Free Course. Follow from last week's conversation on why Goddess Archetypes can deepen our understanding of our subconscious pattern, helps us with acceptance and awareness of our relationship dynamics, as well as women's cycle of life, the four seasons. Part II of the conversation focuses on expanding what we know of ourselves and invites us to think about how can we live more strategically, to honour who we are, or where we are in life. How can we live more fully without pushing and forcing? Ultimately, it is a conversation about how to think, act and become like a goddess.
I shared 3 key concepts in this part II of the course - The Three "G"s:
G x 3 Mindset: God/Goddess - Let the Divine Take The Lead, Growth is better than Fixed, Grit is what we need for the long haul.
Good Habits: Start small, make them easy and consistent, take the thinking out of it. Over time, you will reap accumulated benefits and exponential growth.
Go with Your Cycle: Follow the moon cycle and/or your energy level, chart your woman's cycle can be an eye-opening experience with your productivity and creativity. You will discover your ups and downs and therefore how to plan ahead and stay ahead!
You can access my FREE online quiz here to find out which Goddess Archetype is most active in you.
If you enjoy this two part Honouring Your Divine Feminine Free Course, you would love to come to join us on our upcoming Goddess Self-Care Day event in Sydney on the 24th July! It's going to be a day of yoga, seminars, oracles, meditation, aromatherapy, delicious food and more!
You can find more event information and purchase your tickets here.
Video
https://youtu.be/JxB8vPQqrCw
Transcript
00:01):
Hi, welcome to my show. This is Sze Wing Vetault. Today this podcast is a special edition and this is part two of my honour the Divine Feminine Wisdom: Free Course, and today it is part two. So you may watch this on YouTube or my Facebook page, or you may be listening to my podcast either way. Today it's about following from our first conversation, which we cover goddess archetypes and women's cycle of life. And today we're going to talk about how are you going to apply this information to your life? How are you going to live more strategically and perhaps use this concept to improve your life no matter where you are, who you are and whichever life stage you're in. So a little recap from last week. We talked about the goddess archetype, which I had talked about in my last book called Goddess with Many Faces and I featured six Greek goddesses.
(00:59):
They are: Athena Artemis, Demeter, Hera and Aphrodite. So I have a free quiz online, which you can do instantly. And you can find out who is most active in you, which is a really fun and easy way to get these information and learn about the archetype is most active in you right now, as you grow and evolve, they will change. So if you have done something like that few years ago. It may be different now. So I encourage you to check out that online quiz I have. So, or if you want to listen to the podcast the week before, for sure you can do that. But what is really about is that I talked about the archetype, which is like an inner pattern and blueprint who you are born with, or maybe perhaps circumstances when you were young, that triggered you and like lead you to become, or more influenced by.
(01:57):
Those are goddess archetypes. So many people talk about archetypes. It's not about labelling, but it's about identifying those patterns that really speaks to you. And I liked the goddess ones because I think they're more complex and dynamic. I love the goddess myth. They really talked about the complexity of women and it really applies to our life. And no matter which myth, whichever culture or background and come from a lot of these myths,
This a special edition of my podcast and video. In fact, this is a two parts series of a FREE online course on Honoring Your Divine Feminine Wisdom. I will share with you how to tap into this divine power and experience more harmony, improve your productivity and prosperity. You can listen to my podcast or watch the video here.
Today I am sharing with you Part I of this series where I will start with the archetypes - why knowing our inner patterns or blueprint can be so helpful to overcome our negative tendencies or build on our strengths. They also give us insights into our behaviour and open to more acceptance. The other part of this is to allow us to let the Divine take the lead. We do our part; we play on our strengths but we stay in the flow rather than go against the current.
You can access my FREE online quiz here to find out which Goddess Archetype is most active in you.
In Part II of this series, which will be released next week, I will further the concepts and talk about how can we live more strategically, develop good habits for our archetype and embrace our feminine wisdom as a daily practice.
If you find this episode useful, I would love for you to come to our upcoming in-person event Goddess Self-Care Day in Sydney on 24th July. When women gather, magic happens! We will start the day with moving meditation, then followed by my session on Goddess Self-Care. After lunch, we will learn about intuition and inner wisdom with Denise Javie, the best-selling author of The Secret Language of Light Oracle. We then end the day with an aromatherapy workshop with Carole Gridley, an aromatherapist and perfumer, to learn about the therapeutic and energetic aspects of essential oils and to create your own Goddess Blend to take home! You will also receive a beautiful Oh-My-Goddess gift box to celebrate the day. We are only taking a small group, so get your tickets as soon as you can! You can find more information and purchase your tickets here.
Video
https://youtu.be/drDmHbFHOmU
Transcript
00:00 Good morning, welcome to a special edition of my podcast. And if you're watching it as a video, then it's a two-part video. This is a special series I'm doing. It's about honoring the divine feminine. How are we going to embrace more of our, our inner wisdom and power as a woman, mother, or daughter. And so this become a bigger conversation than I initially expected. So I'm recording it's two part. So today's part one and you go into your able to listen it to from my podcast, or if you're watching as a video on YouTube and Facebook. But I'm really excited to expand this conversation that I have been having for last few years as I evolve and grow as a mother, a woman, a daughter, and a friend. So yeah, I'm really hoping that you will enjoy this conversation or actually a talk.
01:02 But it's really something that I've been putting together since written my last book, Goddess with Many Faces. So yeah, here we go. So as a coach and author and I say creative entrepreneur, because I do create different things. I really feel in the last few years, it was a big evolution for me. So one of the things was obviously after my book goddess with many faces came out. I you know, I have a second baby was working or thinking about the next book, but it kind of got all sidetracked because I was working on my goddess planner series. Now that's all done. And what I have learned through that, it's, it's really getting a deeper understanding of myself. And also what I've been talking about in terms of archetypes and, you know, are in the pattern of feminine energy.
01:59 So when I was, you know, first attracted to the material, I was really fascinated by the nature of the archetypes. I mean, I see it as the, in the pattern, the blueprint, the thing that we're sort of born with because, you know, okay, we have to go back to that. The, the way I subscribe to the view is that I tend to believe we came through spirit,
In this inspiring interview, you will hear from Celeste Hartwell on how can we bring in the feminine energy (intuition) into the masculine structure (action, strategy) to find balance and to fulfil your vision.
No matter whether you are working in a corporate environment or you are an entrepreneur, you can relate to our conversation on why women have a tendency to play small or deflect compliments. You will learn about why it is vital for us to understand and acknowledge our worth, not when we want to ask for a pay rise, but as an act to practise receiving.
2020 and 2021 have been challenging for many people, for many different reasons. We also talked about how can we ride through this time and become more present and honest with our emotions. More importantly, how to find strength in the middle of a crisis, and peace, in a time of uncertainty.
Celeste Hartwell, the creator of Divine Feminine Leaders, a spiritual leader and money mindset mentor. She is also the managing director at eWomenNetwork in Greater Burlington. After 18 years working in a corporate environment, Celeste now helps her clients to step into their power, become more magnetised, visible and inspired.
You can also connect with Celeste via Facebook here.
Interview Highlights
Moving from a corporate job to creating Divine Feminine LeadersIt all came from a dream with Tony Robbins and OprahRe-learning and reclaiming intuitive skillsBe aware of how our mindset and belief system is running the showHelping women to shed off layers of conditioning and open to learning what to do in order to succeed in their dreamsThe balance between feminine and masculine energyBring the intuition (feminine) into the structure and strategy (masculine) in our life is a beautiful balanceAthena Goddess Archetype - Feminine Goddess but works very well in masculine structure.The feminine and productive way to conduct business and fulfil our visionThe No.1 roadblock or false ceiling with women in pursuing their dreams or vision - not allow yourself to receiveThe false belief that we are not worthy or if people are doing anything for us, we are losing our independenceAcceptance compliments and to stop diminishing ourselvesWhy women have a tendency to wait to ask for a bigger paycheck or what they deserveWe need to understand we are the ones who determine our worth and price tag and hence learn how to ask or negotiate for morePeople see our potentials while sometimes we only see our own past failuresThe blessings and the curse of self-awarenessSometimes we can be more forgiving or compassionate towards our loved ones than to ourselvesPractising forgiveness is like training a muscle it takes time and repetitionSometimes just to sit with the pain and let the feelings come up, it may be the most we can do in a difficult situation, be self-compassionateBe aware of what you say to yourself, I AM vs. I FEEL
Video
https://youtu.be/Qkq7ZX6S1Iw
Transcript
Sze Wing: Hi, everyone. I'm really happy to bring in a new guest today for my podcast episode today, I'm talking to Celeste Hartwell. So we met through an eWomen networking event and I was blown away by her energy. And then we had a conversation after, and I think by listening to her journey and her view on feminine leadership it would be very interesting and inspirational for many. So first of all, I would like to introduce and welcome Celeste!
Celeste: Hi Sze, well, thank you so much for having me on. I know that when we met, it was like, we just talk the same language in a lot of different ways. So I'm so honored to be here and thank you so much for having me.
Sze Wing: Thank you. And, you know, one thing for our listeners, or the audience is that we both can talk quite fast when we're excited about things. So let's see how that go. I'm trying to keep it slow. So Celeste has her website, which's called divine feminine leaders, which I think the names says a lot. And for me,
In this interview, you will hear from the renowned publicity strategist, international speaker, consultant, and four times bestselling author Jill Lublin on why being kind is more important than people realised. She shared with us her view on Return on Investment, where all things are transactional, versus if we can focus on Return on Kindness instead. Simply put, when you are a kind company, you get better publicity and having kindness in business, it actually brings you more business. I can't help but think a little kindness can go a long way with our customer relationships as well!
Decades ago Marianne Williamson wrote her international bestseller and highly influential book Return to Love. Jill's Profit of Kindness is also a book written to remind us about humanity and divinity as something we need to come back to. I hope you will enjoy this conversation as much as I do!
Jill A. Lublin is an internationally renowned speaker on the topics of publicity and networking. As an author of her best-selling books Profit of Kindness (Red Wheel Weiser), Get Noticed...Get Referrals, and co-author of the best-sellers Guerrilla Publicity (Adams Media), and Networking Magic (Adams Media), Jill is a master strategist on how to capture the attention of the media and increase your visibility in the marketplace.
Interview Highlights
What her new book "The Profit of Kindness" is about?Why it better to focus on the "Return on Kindness" Principle instead of Return on InvestmentHow to discern someone' authenticity - are they consistent on stage and off stage?Sometimes we want to work with people or coaches that can lead us to the edge of growth, which may be challenging, but that is different from working with people with who we are not comfortable.Understand your own skillset and gaps, so that when you work with others, they can fill in those gaps.The path to success and accomplishment will become clear, but not immediately and we may stumble and fell.Don't get too attached to how you think things need to be, because sometimes they will inform you how they need to be.Patience for an entrepreneur can be tough but things tend to unfold in their own natural ways"When" and "How" do we decide to quit our projects and change our direction.Many paths have projects that didn't take off because there is so much happening in the marketplace. Pick something you are passionate about so that you can stay long enough to see it through and stay in the game.Entrepreneurs are often highly creative and dynamic, we are not good with monotony and that's why it's good to delegate things you don't like to do so that they get done and you can focus on what you do best!
You can find Jill's books and courses here, and you can also connect with her at:
http://www.linkedin.com/in/jilllublinhttp://twitter.com/JillLublinhttp://www.facebook.com/people/Jill-Lublin/1143437802
Video
https://youtu.be/7Joudr_GVyI
Transcript
Sze Wing: Hi, everyone. I'm really excited to introduce you to my guest Jill Lublin all the way from the USA today. And I'm so pleased that she has agreed to come on to be my guest on my podcast. So hi, Jill So great to be here with you. Thank you so much. So a little short introduction. Jill is an international speaker on the topic of Radical Influence, Publicity, Networking, Kindness, and Referrals, and she's also has bestselling books and which we are going to talk about her latest one. And as many of my listeners know that I'm also writing my own books. So definitely I'm so honoured to actually have her to be interviewed. And I'm really excited to ask her with my questions. So, and her latest book is The Profit of Kindness, which went on to be number one in four categories.
Sze Wing: Jill is a master strategist on how to position a business for more profitability and more visibility in marketplace. She's a CEO of a strategic consulting firm and has over 25 years experience working with over 100,
Do you feel stuck in your life right now?
Are you wondering what is your life purpose or if you are on the right path?
Sometimes we feel we are playing small or not on the "right track", and other times, we may feel we are going through life in motion, but not exactly present or becoming the best version of ourselves.
If any of these describe your current state of mind or feeling, then this interview may be a great pick-me-up to energise you and give you some clarity that you need.
I interviewed Terry Kerr a while back, but our conversation is timeless and I have no doubt the content applies to us many times in life.
Teri Kerr is an ICF certified Executive Coach through Royal Roads University and a graduate of the Purpose Project™. She lives in Victoria BC with her husband Jeff, a revolving door of teenagers, her beloved golden mountain dog Indy, and a one-eyed cat named Tallie.
You can connect with Teri via her website: https://unstuckduck.ca/
Feeling you may like give coaching a go? You can find out more about personal coaching with Sze Wing here. Achieving a goal or solving a problem is ONLY the by-product or “side-effects” of coaching. The magic is in your own discovery about yourself, a deeper awareness about your strengths & desires, and knowing what strategy actually works for you going forward in life.
Interview Highlights:
The idea of "Unstuck Duck" - helping women to get out of their corporate job into entrepreneurshipFrom Super Busy Mum to the journey of Surviving Cancer"Be More You" - why bringing more joy and fulfilment into your life is so importantTrying to fit in or stepping into others' shoes may make us forget who we areWe don't need to go through life with a "elbows up" a power through approach - sometimes it works better for us if we can soften instead of hardening our exterior to approach our lifeBe aware when we start to go through life in motion, but not really present in it, we may lose touch with who we are or our spouse/partnerHow to cultivate a sense of awareness to become more conscious in our lifeWays to spot red flags when we are disconnected from our loved onesHow do you want to be remembered - write your own eulogyChanging Lane: Start with reflecting on how life is working out (or not) and then creating new habits and experiencesWe don't have a choice of what happens to us, but we have a choice of how we react to it and move forward through it.How do you want your next 30 years to look like?Playing Big - your greatness lies in the small day-to-day, moment-by-moment decisions. You have a choice in every moment, how you think, feel and act base on who you want to be now and in the future.Living on purpose is a muscle that needs to be trained and exercised regularly.Living life is like collecting data, one step at a time, to figure it all outRemember other people's opinion or expectation is just theirs, you need to do you and know what works for you instead of trying to please everyone.Why we need to be aware not to get too attached to our stories, or to be right.
Video
https://youtu.be/iQYcYTElQOk
Transcript
Sze Wing: Hi everyone today. I'm really excited to talk to my new friend - Terry Kerr and what's so special about today's interview is that we just met not long ago and she's actually living in Victoria, British Columbia in Canada. And it works out the time zone is actually pretty easy for us to connect. I'm so excited because you know, it's always lovely to talk to someone from far away from Australia and especially during COVID-19 these days we cannot travel. So this is really exciting for me to talk to someone not from my continent. So a little bit about Terry she's a coach, I think executive coach and empowerment strategies is more the accurate term. She's also an artist, hockey mom, cancer survivor , speaker and creative warrior. And I think many of us actually share similar interests or life goals in this community who are listening and watch...
I am super thrilled to release this podcast episode as marks the number 100 episodes of my #ConversationsThatMatter podcast. My guest in this episode is Rebecca Barrett, my yoga teacher who has completely changed my attitude towards yin yoga. I started her classes just 6 weeks after I gave birth to my second child (baby Noah) and I absolutely love her style of teaching, which always involves an aspect of yogic philosophy in the mix. If you are interested to know more about yoga, how it helps us to connect our body and mind, and perhaps most importantly, how to be a life long preparer for whatever comes in life, you'd love this episode!
Highlights
Sometimes when you meditate or when you practise mindfulness, it's like you're preparing yourself for the worst day of your life. You're preparing yourself for these hard times when they happen, be it COVID or personal circumstances. It is about being a "life-long preparer".
The word yoga means union or to yoke. It is connecting the mental and the physical. So by use of the breath, you're connecting your mind with your body.
Yogic philosophy, storytelling and why it is so powerful in a Yoga Calm class
Yoga on a micro-level is the "here and now" on your body, and on a macro-level, it is about how it relates to our life and mind.
Learning how to be comfortable by being in the uncomfortable space (both body and mind) i.e. The practice of discomfort and just being okay with that.
We're all looking for what makes us happy, and we're all trying to avoid suffering. But we often have different ideas of what's going to make us happy when compare to reality.
The tension between "just push a little harder" and "letting go", when to stop pushing but releasing the tension, to surrender - that's the art of balancing. (both in holding a pose and in life!)
We often store different emotions and memories in our body. And so by coming into difficult yoga poses, it can help those emotions kind of move through us because it's all about mindfulness and self-observation.
You don't have to believe all of your thoughts. Your thoughts are not facts. You can just choose what you want to do with your thoughts.
What if every single thing that is happening to us is for our spiritual awakening? So everything, in a way, is a lesson to help us to get to where we are meant to be.
Spirituality and productivity are not mutually exclusive, in fact, with a clearer mind with better focus, we can accomplish more things and be better at doing them!
Intentions for 2021: Acceptance and letting go of control, not thinking how things could be different or how to fix things but appreciating what we already have or things are already here.
If you would like to know more about Rebecca and her yoga classes, you can find her on the following social media handles: Facebook Instagram
At the time of recording this episode (2021), she teaches at BodyMindLife, Be One Yoga and FitnessPlayground in Sydney.
https://youtu.be/3r49ka0XTnw
Transcript
Sze Wing:Hi, everyone. I'm really excited to introduce my guest today. Today with me here is Rebecca Barrett. She's my yoga teacher. I met her in my yoga studio. And I'm really excited to do this podcast because I think, if I'm not wrong, this is going to be my # 100 episode. So it's a bit of a celebration for my side. And I think a lot of topics that we talked about in class and here today will be quite fitting for this celebration. So welcome, Rebecca.Rebecca:Hi. How are you?Sze Wing:I'm great. And so as we are recording this, this is just the beginning of 2021, so we just have a new start of the year. And I thought this is quite exciting, because we have been having a very crazy year, and I'm sure we are going to dive into a little bit more about it for our listeners, who are most likely to be interested in some sort of health and wellbeing related topics. And yoga is the big one, so I think today's conversation, hopefully,
If you are a multi-passionate person like me, someone who has several deep curiosities or interests in life, then staying in your lane will be challenging.
To feel fulfilled, we must tend to our inner desire, but where is the time? Or further to that, how can we do it all? How can we channel our creativity fully?
Perhaps you don't consider yourself as a multi-passionate person but somehow you feel your life is stagnated or "stuck". Then, you may also want to look at where are you expressing your creativity, if at all.
What I've found is that when we get stressed in any area of our life, be it about work or family responsibilities, more often than not, we turn to things that can temporarily distract us from the overwhelming situation. The common thing most of us do is to scroll through our social media feeds or check out the news. Both can easily suck up all our spare time and fill up the tiny gaps in our life.
As a result, there is no time or space for us to really dig deep or sit with the uncomfortable feelings about what is really going on in our life. Life seems so busy but we may not necessarily feel fulfilled or living with a clear purpose.
We may be doing a lot of things, but they don't necessarily matter all that much.
To know what really matters or bring meaning to our life, we actually need to face the things we try to avoid. You may have guessed it by now - yes, we need to dip deeper and sit with those uncomfortable feelings. They can teach us what we need to know.
Stillness Is The Key
When we get still, the chatter in our mind gets louder but we also become more aware that they are in fact, chatter. They are thoughts that may not be true or important. From there, we are one step closer to realise what matters and need our attention. To become more self-aware and listen to our inner being are part of engaging with our feminine energy.
Feminine energy emphasis on being intuitive, adaptive, receptive, reflective and creative. When we become more aware and conscious, next is about harnessing the practice.
For this week's podcast, I would like to focus on two key elements in embracing our feminine energy.
Creativity
When we are deliberate about living and embracing our feminine energy, it is inevitable that we want to channel our creativity or expressing our inner potentials. It is like a flower that is destined to blossom. You may feel drawn to draw, paint, dance, sing, write, make or innovate things, whichever creative avenue you choose, it acts as a conduit for us to express that creative energy. Not only it is vitalising for our spirit, but it also brings us new insights about ourselves.
Carl Jung wrote about how our subconscious always seeks ways to express itself to our conscious mind.
There is so much literature out there to support the benefits of creative practices and creativity is one of the most talked-about and sort after skills in recruitment.
If you feel you need a lift for your mood, think about something you would like to do that is in some ways expressing your creative energy, no matter how unconventional that may be.
Self-Reflection
It goes without saying that self-reflection is an important part of personal growth. However, it is always easier if we have tools to give us structure or help us to create space for that purpose. That's why journaling, free-writing and meditation are great tools for that. It doesn't come easy for many of us to know how we really feel.
Personally, I love using some kind of inspirational journal that prompted me to think or write down my thoughts. I also follow the moon cycle as my energy as well as the planetary energy change accordingly throughout the month. Some days are best for going out and connecting with people, but other days it suits me better to retreat, reflect and recharge my energy.
I find it extremely useful by planning my month of creative work by following the moon cycles.
I had all the plans to end 2020 with a couple of new posts, giveaways and special videos, but all went into the ditch when my husband and the little ones went under the weather. Then, we had to change our holiday plans and rebooked everything. We didn't get to see our parents this year, but we are just really grateful that they are all healthy and well.
This is what I have learned from this year. We need to keep our heads above the chaos and see from different perspectives. To understand what really matters, and so become more flexible and think outside of the box. This certainly helps us to forward faster and become more adaptive. Baby number two and the pandemic effectively have changed the way I work and think.
Another aspect I've learned is to stop pushing at all fronts, get better at prioritizing and allow myself to let go more. It reminds me of Tao's philosophy. Less forcing, more allowing. To feel the lightness of being, one must learn how to surrender in order to move freely. We practice how to get really focused yet relaxed at the same time. Holding the seemingly opposite in great balance.
It feels like I have started a new chapter, or entered a new age.
In fact, it is exactly what happened.
If you are interested in Astronomy or Astrology, you would have heard about all the buzz around the winter solstice (or summer solstice here in Southern Hemisphere) on the 21 December. This past solstice also marked the great conjunction of the planets Jupiter and Saturn. What it means is that these two planets appear closest together in the sky, when Jupiter "overtakes" Saturn in its orbit. This great conjunction occurs approximately every 20 years.
However, the 2020 great conjunction of Jupiter and Saturn was the closest one since 1623 and the closest observable since 1226. From a spiritual perspective, Jupiter is said to be the planet of optimism, expansion, thought-leadership, healing and growth. Saturn, on the other hand, is associated with restriction, responsibility, and long-term lessons. When these energies combine, we can expect a major shift in consciousness or awaking so to speak. Also, for many years, the great conjunctions occur in signs of the same element (e.g. either Earth, Water, Air or Fire).
But with this conjunction, it actually switched to occur in a new element ( from Earth to Air). This is called a ‘mutation’ and therefore, it also marks the beginning of a new era or age. Again, the Earth sign represents the material realm, while the air represents the mind or consciousness.
When we change our way to think, we change our way to act.
This is the new era for more social and humanitarian collaborations. We moved from only thinking the need to acquire "things", to the necessity to connect with other "beings". The isolations and hardship we experienced in 2020 taught us what we really hold dear. For me, it was about letting go and surrender. When my family is unwell, I know that becomes my priority. My work would have to take a step back. Plans would have to change. And that is OK. To really allow that wasn't easy, but it makes what I can actually create or acomplish even sweeter and more precious.
That is what I've reflected on about 2020. What about you? What are the top 3 things you are most grateful for? What are you most looking forward to in 2021? What is the change you like to see or be in yourself?
As I am finishing this blog & podcast, it is actually Christmas eve, and so I would like to wish you a Merry Christmas and get ready for a New Year - New Era! I will be taking a little time off but I'll talk to you again in early Jan 2021!
P.S. I about to launch my Goddess Planner and I am super excited about it. It is more than a weekly planner for sure. It has a 12-month Moon Calendar, Moon Diary Pages, Habit tracker, Body, Mind & Spirit weekly check-in, and so much more! It is designed to help you to better understand your body's rhyme and emotional needs.
If you have a family to look after or a job to attend to or a body to take care of, you may feel stress at any given day for many different reasons. Yes, in fact, I imply everybody on this planet is susceptible to get stressed! That's why this episode on stress management and good self-care practices is useful for everyone.
My guest for this week's podcast is Rita Garnto. Rita is an author and educator. She had a 20-year career in western healthcare as a Registered Respiratory Therapist and worked in Canada (where she was born), Saudi Arabia and in the United States. In 2004 she began her massage therapy private practice and after 16 years running, she is now educating and speaking on the dangers of stress and providing simple self-care solutions to combat the negative effects of stress. Learn more from her book "Simple Self-Care Saved Me" here.
In her career, she had cared for patients ranging in age from premature babies to the elderly and everyone in between. In her lengthy career, she had been part of the trauma flight team at Carolinas Medical Center in Charlotte, NC. and she was caring for critically ill patients during transport flights on helicopters and aeroplanes. Rita has vast experience in caring and supporting patients in all kind of stressful situations. Over time, her mission has evolved into focusing on improving the health and life of busy women and their families, simply and without overwhelm.
Interview Highlights
Self-care is about self-preservation and not self-indulgenceRita learned about stress from working in a life or death environment as being part of a trauma flight team for many years, also her personal experience with her family as well as being a massage therapist who saw many clients that came through because of stress-related issues.We often under estimate the level of control we have in life, so the key question is, “What changes are you going to make?” If you want to break from your current situation.Using her trauma flight team days to develop her stress management lectures and presentations to educate people how to manage stress on a daily basis.Connecting the Eastern philosophy and Western medical training to reduce stress.Time out to stress less - Rita's short Facebook Live to give short tips and advice for us to practise self-care, to connect with others, and to be authentic.When we feel stress, our brain triggers the fight or flight response in our body. It is an essential response if we need to run away from actual danger, but when that is not the case, it puts pressure on our mental and physical health, especially when it happens frequently.Other negative effects of stress include stress eating or loss of appetite, insomnia, may be withdrawn or trigger anxiety, mild depression, etc.Women tend to take care of everybody else before we take care of ourselves or need to get permission to do self-care.The difference between self-care and simple self-care: easy actions and habits that can build on themselves.
If you would like to connect with Rita, please visit her website or FaceBook page:
simpleselfcare.net
https://simpleselfcare.net/book
https://www.facebook.com/rkgarnto
Video
https://youtu.be/oFiLVsGPHP8
Transcript
Sze Wing:hi everybody, I'm really happy to introduce you to my guest for the week. Today we have Rita Garnto. So little short introduction, she is an amazing woman and she had a 20-year career in Western Healthcare, as a respiratory therapist and she worked in Canada where she was from, Saudi Arabia and the United States, which is really diverse places to work at. And then in 2004, she began her massage therapy private practice and after16 years she is now educating and speaking on the dangers of stress and providing simple solutions to combat the negative effects of stress. And let's be honest, stress is around us so much these days, even by the time this episode comes out, it will still be in the time of Pandemic, I'm pretty sure,
If your desire is larger than your belief, it means you don’t actually expect what you want is going to happen. In fact, if it does, it will kind of catch you by surprise.
I heard about this saying in a video related to the Law of Attraction. It instantly sticks on my mind.
So how does it play out in terms of manifesting what we want? Is it counterproductive then? We attract things through what we believe in, or in other words, through vibration proximity.
I remember what the late Dr Wayne Dyer used to say from his lectures, "Believe it, and you will see it". Not the other way round. If you need to see it in order to believe it, you may never get there!
I know how important and power our belief systems is. Needless to say, it caught me by surprise to realize in some case, my desire is far greater than my belief in achieving it.
It leads me to question, how often do we believe in what we want or what we dream of is actually possible to fulfil?
So here is my personal example: I have always believed that I can write and self-publish a book or books. But do I believe I can write a best seller? Or a great book?
The truth is, I never even dared to ask that question because subconsciously I didn’t believe I could do it. But I know enough about the power of my own belief and intellectually I have opted to shy away to fully examine what is that I really believe.
So next question, why not?
Is it about confidence? Or about faith?
What I have discovered is that through consistent practice, meaning, writing and working on my craft, I will gain confidence. In time, my faith will also get stronger. My belief in my own capacity or even destiny will grow.
We can not think our way into this, in order to grow my abilities or faith in this case, I need to act. It is about practice. The chop-wood-carry-water type of action may seem mundane, but they are the building blocks. The day in day out type of work is the key to improve my craft.
In time, I know I will feel more confident, I will improve my craft, and good writing or even a best-seller may eventually happen.
To desire is easy, to have faith it takes work.
It is clear in my mind that I need to believe in myself, and instead of merely doing affirmations (it is useful too) I will compound it with consistent writing and learning to improve myself.
And THAT is the work.
What about you? What is your greatest desire right now? Do you believe you can fulfil it? If not, why not? What you think is sabotaging you, is it your belief system or various form of fear? Please share with me as I'd love to hear your experience.
Subscribe & Review in iTunes
Are you subscribed to my podcast? If you’re not, I love to encourage you to do that. I don’t want you to miss an episode. Also, I offer occasional gifts and early-bird offer of my programs first on my podcast! You can use this link to subscribe on iTunes! You can also find me on Spotify and other podcast platforms, just search for @SzeWingVetault and you will find me.
Now if you are extra nice and kind, I would be really grateful if you left me a review over on iTunes too. Those reviews help other people find my podcast and I’d love reading them! Just click here to review, select “Ratings and Review” and Write a Review”. That’s it! Thank You!!
Many women I know have this problem: We want to establish or grow a career or business we love, at the same time, we want to maintain a healthy and happy family life as well. But then at some point, we just feel exhausted, out of steam, overwhelmed or completely burnout. So how can we "have it all" without giving up our passion, purpose or worst, losing our minds?
Where do we start? What are we missing?
If you are someone who wants to feel fulfilled both from the inside and outside, then have a listen to my podcast interview with Rebecca Swanson. We discussed what do we need to ask ourselves or put in place in order to create a lifestyle that we desire and it can be sustainable in the long run too.
Rebecca Swanson is a life coach, business strategist, natural health & wellness advocate. She is a psychology graduate, certified NLP trainer and lifelong experiential learner. She is also a mother of 3 children and a loving partner.
Interview Highlights:
Rebecca's evolving story - from corporate leader to life coach, student of psychology and now helping women to get back their sass! The real reason why women are so tired and exhausted in our modern society How to "have it all" meaning: happy relationships and healthy body (internal) and career success and fulfilment (external) without losing who we are and our minds! The No. 1 thing we need to look at or do in order to live a more courageous, authentic and passionate lifeThe most common obstacle/challenge that many career women/working mums face and the lesson it also bringsWhen we feel stuck or lack of choice, it is actually a call of deeper reflection and it is also an opportunity for growth and new beginnings.
If you would like to connect with Rebecca, please visit her website:
https://www.rebeccaswanson.com.au/
Video
https://youtu.be/RehzJ02Au_0
Personally, I find this quarter of 2020 a very sobering time.
The pandemic, social unrest and natural disasters all make this year tough for many of us. I’ve heard many heartfelt stories from my high school friends and work colleagues who live various part of the world. Nothing is “normal” and everyone I know is affected in all different kind of ways.
My son has just turned 6 months old and despite the fact that I have little control of my time, and the needs and desire of this tiny little human being is very often (if not always) prioritized over mine. This period of time also gives me permission to dive deeper into my ambition, question what really matters to me at this stage in my life, what is my purpose, role or responsibilities.
What I have conjured up is a list of reminders to help me and others to gain a different perspective. Or perhaps a way to decide when to say “No" to certain thoughts or behavioural patterns. And equally important is what do I need to say “Yes” to or things I should continue to do.
I am certain there are times in your life where you may need a little reminder as well. And so that is what I would like to share with you this week.
Things to "Stop" doing
When you catch yourself judging yourself or others senselessly or being overcritical because of the subject matter riggers your vulnerability.
Being overly attached to the outcomes of your endeavour. Wish for the best, prepare for the worse, expect it to turn out just the way it should be, in divine timing and manner.
Caring too much what others think of you because no matter what you do or don’t do, you cannot control what others think. The most important thing is how you think of yourself, do you like or love who you are? Are you being YOU?
Stop expecting others to change before you do.
Numbing your feelings by making yourself too busy, spending too much time on social media or addicting to anything (over-exercising, food or TV) in order to stop you from looking at what is really going on in your life.
Things to "Start" doing
Create quiet time for yourself daily, no matter how short that time maybe. Even 5 minutes. Just you and being in silence.
Savouring every experience or moment in time. Give yourself the permission to be fully present, no multi-tasking just focus on the one thing you are doing at that moment in time. Time is something you can NEVER get back.
When your desire is bigger than your belief, you actually don’t expect what you want is going to happen. Find ways that can strengthen your faith. Make it a conscious practice. An exercise if you will. Start to believe it.
Things to "Continue" to do
All the good practices that you know work wonders for you. Yoga, meditation, journaling, paint, bushwalk, play music, pray, write. Make them as habits. Not one-off events or just do them from time to time.
Nurture the relationships you are blessed to have so far. There is no chance encounter. Treat everyone as a divine plan or intervention.
To remember that we are not defined by things we have accomplished, but the way how we achieve them and the relationships we build along the way.
Stay true to who you are, be kind, courageous and don’t forget to laugh.
Subscribe & Review in iTunes
Are you subscribed to my podcast? If you’re not, I love to encourage you to do that. I don’t want you to miss an episode. Also, I offer occasional gifts and early-bird offer of my programs first on my podcast! You can use this link to subscribe on iTunes! You can also find me on Spotify and other podcast platforms, just search for @SzeWingVetault and you will find me.
Now if you are extra nice and kind, I would be really grateful if you left me a review over on iTunes too. Those reviews help other people find my podcast and I’d love reading them! Just click here to review, select “Ratings and Review” and Write a Review”. That’s it! Thank You!!
Many of us have suffered different effects of the pandemic in 2020. There are days where it is hard to make sense of it all or think about what to expect for 2021. That's why I found my interview with Karen Chaston is super timely, as it helps us to get a different perspective when it comes to tragedy, suffering and life lessons.
In July 2011, Karen’s life changed forever when her son died unexpectedly. It is without a doubt a mother's worst nightmare. Within 15 months, Karen resigned from her CFO role of a publicly listed company and began a personal, professional and spiritual journey. From that point on, all the experiences have led hers into becoming a beyond loss expert and co-founding her business Live Love By Design.
Fast forward to today, Karen Chaston is known as a business owner, beyond loss mentor and international keynote speaker who has shared the stage with Marianne Williamson, Jamie-Lee Curtis, Valerie Harper and Dr Ellie Drake. She is the author of eight books and numerous e-books as well as an online TV show host and podcaster.
Interview Highlights:
How a mother’s worst nightmare has lead Karen from a CFO to become a Beyond Loss expert.Her professional and spiritual journey to move through grief and growth. Eventually, she re-calibrated and re-design her life. 5 Steps process: The Gift of Loss - We start with a Stop and Go within.People come into your life for a reason or for a spiritual lessonThere are over 40 different loss events that can affect our livesSadness is completely different from grieving and sufferingInstead of buying into someone else’s version of success and good life, we take time to design the life we actually love. That’s why Karen has co-founded her business "Live Love By Design"Three aspects of every relationship: Physical, emotional ad spiritual Sometimes the loss that we experience is not one-dimensional, it brings another kind of giftWays to connect with Karen and her webinars on topics related to: "The Gift of Loss" and "Live Love By Design”.
If you would like to connect with Karen, please visit:
https://www.karenchaston.com/
https://www.livelovebydesign.com/
Video:
https://youtu.be/FNwGvd5FmAc
Transcript:
Sze Wing:Hi, everyone. I'm really happy to introduce you to my guest of the day. We have Karen Chaston with me, and she's a business owner, a Beyond Loss mentor and international keynote speaker, and I'm really excited to chat with her because she had been on stage with some really big names including Marianne Williamson, Jamie Lee Curtis, Valerie Harper and Dr Ellie Drake to name a few. So I mean, I don't know how it's going to be on the same stage with these people because I think, I love public speaking but I still sometimes get nervous, so anyway. Not the major focus for today, but I can't help it, I'm off script sometimes. Anyway. She's also an author for eight books, probably more now, and working on some more, and numerous ebooks as well as online TV show host and podcaster. So you can tell, she has been busy working and sharing her work. And in her corporate career earlier, she was a CPA, CFO of a public listed company, and a city manager for more than 25 years. So definitely, she has a very solid background in the corporate world, but she also have-- probably hand in hand that you've been obviously very productive and effective in your life, and you have written eight books after that, so. But so today, I'm really pleased to have her as my guest. About nine years ago, her life have changed forever when a tragedy hit, and within 15 months, she had resigned from her CFO and began a personal, professional and spiritual journey, and that's, I think, leading her to become a Beyond Loss expert and for founding her business called Live, Love By Design. So today, I'm very grateful to have you as my guest, Karen. So welcome to my show.Karen:Thank you, Sze, I'm so glad to be here. It's exciting. We've known each other probably for what,
It happens to everyone. More than we realized, the feeling of being stuck or jaded about a situation starts from a thought, but when we keep thinking about it, it gains momentum.
Eventually that thought becomes so stubborn and unwilling to leave our mind. The negative feeling or even hopelessness grows. But the good news is, that thought may seem loud and true in our mind, it may not be true in reality.
But the problem is when we are engaged in thinking, feeling and believing we are stuck in a situation, our minds are unable to come up with a solution. Our eyes can't see the opportunities and our hears aren't open to the lessons in store.
So what do we do?
Just pause and observe
Instead of deliberately thinking our thoughts, sometimes our thoughts just randomly appear. There are millions of reasons why we think or feel a certain way and everyone has different triggers based on our past experiences. Perhaps it maybe just a bad day or a bad moment. When a negative or unpleasant thought appears, we don't always have to engage and act on it right the way. When it startles us, we can simply pause and observe. Detach and step back.
Next we ask ourselves, is it really our soul speaking to us, or most likely our ego self that tries to get our attention? Those thoughts that come under the brand wagon of "I am not good enough" or "It just won't work for me" often come in the disguise of some kind of insight, but as a matter of fact, it is a moment when we are not truly being (or believe in) ourselves. If we can catch from that thought early and stop its momentum, it would be best. If not, here is my next strategy.
Distract yourself and reset your mindset
You may be able to list all the reasons why it is not working out for you or why you are stuck in a tricky situation. But once again, with that line of thinking, you are NOT going to be able to solve your problem. Just like what Albert Einstein famously said: "We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them."
Consider the law of attraction, if you keep beating the drums of "I am not having enough money" or "All the eligible & good men/women are not available to me", like attracts like, you will find all the reasons and evidence to show you why you think those thoughts. However, if you change your way of thinking and feeling by distracting yourself. For example, go for a nice walk, watch the sunset, read a book or even take a nap. In other words, raise your vibration, stop talking yourself further into the worries or fear. When you relax and feel better, you become less fixated on the problem itself, you may see a solution or change your mindset on it entirely.
Fact check
Now once we are able to distract our mind or soothe our hearts, another great way to get unstuck is actually to check the facts without all the strong emotions that may cloud our judgement. Are we really looking at all the angles? Do we really know for sure? Where is our blind spot? What may actually help us with finding a way out?
More than sleep on it, pray on it
This may seem passive, but it is not. It is along the same line as distracting our minds but added another layer. When we sleep, it is like hitting a reset button, with good night sleep, we may think clearer and our days seem more hopeful in the morning. That's a start. Also, there are times where things are completely out of our control or we just won't be able to foresee what is beyond what we know. It's ok to say to the universe, I don't know, please guide me through it. Leave it to the universe to do it work. I always believe the universe is conspired to make us happy and fulfilled. It has our best interests at heart. Sometimes it is we who are not listening or actually getting in the way.
Don't gamble, but invest
So what I mean by don't gamble is taking unnecessary risks. For example, you don't like your day job, instead of quitting your job on an impulse,
Recently I read an interview about how to maintain a strong and healthy marriage - one of the keys is to let them be who they are, and the other one is to be truly happy for their spouse’ success.
It is exactly how I felt when my husband’s business won an award last year or when my first book was released, I could see he was really excited for me.
I realized it is key to a good marriage and I also notice it is sometimes not so easily done - say if you have been struggling with your business or weight loss or trying to conceive or to find a romantic partner. When someone you know brought in the good news, you secretly feel sad for yourself.
It can be hard not because we don’t want that for the other person, but it is the fear that we would never have it for ourselves. It is true if it a competition, like winning an Oscar, there is only 1 winner in that scenario, but chances are, most of us are not facing this type of direct competitions daily.
More often than not, the way we fear falls into the zero-sum game category, where we say all the good men are taken or who is going to buy my products if they get yours, etc. We live in the fear that there is just not enough to go around.
Another type of fear stems from unworthiness or question do we deserve that good thing, deep down.
It is tiring, to say the least, and unproductive most of the time.
Do you also notice it is far easier to be there for someone when they are wounded than truly happy for their success?
I figured it all comes down to your attitude - if you are the type who see the glass is half full instead of empty, it is more natural for you to say: If she can do it, so can I!
Another factor is how willing and capable you are to make peace with where you are. The ability to find gratitude in the unlikely moments.
The truth of the matter is - we all want to same things - happiness, peace and joy.
When we are stuck in that fear of lack, or negative self-talk and jealousy, we direct all our energy into the “I am not having what I want” mind space. Even if a good opportunity or perfect solution comes up, our mind wouldn’t be able to recognize it or act upon it.
In another word, cultivating a good attitude is key to finding success or experiencing happiness.
So next time, when you catch yourself feeling down because you somehow feel “less than” or unable to celebrate someone else's success, remind yourself you can change that line of thinking.
Draw a breath. Pause. Take a U-turn.
Choose thoughts like:
If it is possible for someone, it is possible for me - if it is right for me.
The universe conspires to bring me joy, even if I don’t see the full picture right now.
If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at will change too.
positiveselftalk #celebratesuccess #changeyourmind #mindset #findingsuccess #happiness
Have you been thinking about writing your book? Perhaps it is your life story, your knowledge and wisdom or a fictional story. Regardless of what kind of book you have in mind, you may feel insecure, frustrated or overwhelmed in writing your book. That is where a writing coach can help you to move through it. For that reason, I am really excited to share with you my interview with Rhonda Salvestrini. Rhonda is a professional writing coach and a writer for over 25 years. We had such fun recording this interview as I love writing and learning from her experience as well.
When I read through the transcript, I had another round of appreciation for her work, how to write good non-fiction and connect with our readers. I hope you will enjoy this episode as much as I do!
You can listen to this podcast on this page, iTunes, Spotify or any major podcast platforms. Alternatively, you can watch our videos below. The transcript is right at the bottom as well.
Rhoda Salvestrini is a writing coach. She is a professional writer for more than 25 years. She has helped writers to see the clarity through the chaos, overcome the hurdles of frustration transform and self-doubt. She has also supported aspiring authors to bring their story to life, long-time authors complete their memoir, and TEDx speakers bring the audience to their feet. Her mission is to help authors to feel energized and excited about the writing process; to find confidence in their voice, be inspired to write fearlessly, and connect with their audience through authenticity.
Highlights
How words can scare people because they can bring up emotions and fearsTransforming self-doubt into creating something impactfulNon-fiction books are purposeful and intentional, it needs structure How to write impactful non-fiction - you are still telling a story Start with your “Why”The relationship with your writing coach is a highly personal one, she needs to understand your why and give constructive feedback, at the same time, you can be open to being receptive and non-defensiveThe importance to connect to your readers emotionally Trust the process, be your authentic self instead of judging yourself Know your audience - who are you talking to? When it comes to writing, there are mechanics, but there is no one size fit all, the most important thing is to get the story out first Different forms of editing - taking your story from good to great It takes courage to write and to give it someone to edit/read but the reward is huge too
If you would like to get in touch with Rhonda, please visit her website: https://www.rhondasalvestrini.com/
https://www.rhondasalvestrini.com/
Subscribe & Review in iTunes
Are you subscribed to my podcast? If you’re not, I love to encourage you to do that. I don’t want you to miss an episode. Also, I offer occasional gifts and early-bird offer of my programs first on my podcast! You can use this link to subscribe on iTunes! You can also find me on Spotify and other podcast platforms, just search for @SzeWingVetault and you will find me.
Now if you are extra nice and kind, I would be really grateful if you left me a review over on iTunes too. Those reviews help other people find my podcast and I’d love reading them! Just click here to review, select “Ratings and Review” and Write a Review”. That’s it! Thank You!!
Video
https://youtu.be/EpBrzPjU0ao
Transcript
Sze Wing:Hi, everyone. I'm really happy because, today, joining me is Rhonda Salvestrini, and she's the Writing Coach. First time I'm interviewing a writing coach. And I write books myself, so we got lots in common, and we had some fabulous chat before so I'm super excited. So a little introduction. So apart from being a writing coach, she is a professional writer for more than 25 years, and she has helped writers to see the clarity through the chaos, overcome hurdles of frustration, transform their self-doubt. We all face that, really, seriously,
Do you sometimes hear yourself having a dialogue inside your head about what you just said or how you may have come across in a situation with others?
I’ve noticed lately about my increasing mind chatter. It happens because I have entered a couple of new social groups. One is at my gym and the other is with mums who just had a second baby.
Here is the thing, we are often out of our comfort zone when we move to a new area, start a new job or meet new people. We haven’t established whether or not we are accepted to the new tribe or if we feel a sense of belonging to the new setting.
All of a sudden we become more aware of who we are and what we represent. More often than we would think, we judge ourselves on big and small things.
In many ways, judgement is a learned experience.
I remember this incredible scene in a movie I saw years ago, a very mean step-dad asked his step-son to rate himself between 1-10. Just like that. Nothing specific. Totally random.
The son was a shy boy and with reluctance, he quietly uttered: “I don’t know. Six?” (I guess this is his way of saying he thinks he “passed" the test somehow)
The step-dad replied, “Hmm… I think you are more like a Three to me.”
I know, what is that? Totally mean. And of course, the step-dad said all the mean things to cover up his own insecurity and frankly, unkindness. He picked on this teenage vulnerable step-son. But it is not uncommon that when we judge others, we also inevitably judge ourselves.
There are some healthy scenarios that we do need to judge others. Let’s say you are in a sports competition or martial art fight, you need to size up your opponent. But in our daily life, we have a tendency to do just about the same. Comparing ourselves to others in ways that are often unnecessary. Perhaps it comes from our human nature or survival instinct. But when we judge ourselves harshly, it becomes counterproductive and disconstructive.
When our digital age and social media glorifies instant gratification and perfection, we are under tremendous pressure to “look” a certain way and “like” by many, all are different ways of validating that we need to belong and accepted by others.
From this perspective, how can we not become more judgemental towards ourselves?
If you hear someone begins a sentence with “I don’t mean to judge, but …” it is a warning sign. More than likely that you are about to hear a ton of judgement disguising as "honest opinion”.
When our minds are filled with judgement, whether or not it is towards ourselves or others, it is not a nice neighbourhood to live in.
The act of judgement also weights our spirit down. In order to soar, we must become kinder to ourselves and others. We don’t know the full story behind someone’s success, failure, appearance, behaviour and so on.
Mirroring that, people don’t know you the way you do. If someone is unkind to you, remind yourself that it is actually not your business. The only business you have is how you respond and react to them.
Being kind and gentle with yourself when you are feeling vulnerable is a practice. And it is not always easy. Sometimes we react in a way that we will later regret, we don’t always get it right. But it is ok. As long as will try to do it better next time.
It is a practice and a work in progress.
Think about an area in your life that you tend to judge yourself or compare to others. Is it a healthy or unhealthy scenario? How does it make you feel? Does it motivates you somehow or actually weight you down, and as a result, you find yourself in procrastination or denial?
What would happen if every time you want to say something judgmental to yourself, you pause and take a breath. Then, you consciously switch to say something loving and empowering instead?
For example, when you catch yourself saying:
You are not good enough —> switch to —> Look at how far you’ve come
I was so stupid,
How often do you sit with your emotions and try to understand why you feel the way you do?
Many of us are brought up with an attitude that being rational is better or we should stop being "so emotional". Certainly if we are acting against our better judgement because we are overly emotional over a matter is not a good thing. But so is denying or ignore our emotions and only rely on our thinking without our feeling.
Don't get me wrong, both rationale and emotion have its place, they both can give us important information that to help us to make better decisions.
Some said being confident is a learned skill. I say, being able to understand and stay in touch with our emotion is also a learned skill. So today I have an interview with Lisa Jayne precisely on this subject matter to share with you.
Lisa Jayne is an author, speaker and visionary for the path of Emotional Evolution. With over 15 years experience as an Emotions Practitioner and Educator, she has accompanied thousands of individuals into their emotional worlds and become a passionate advocate for mastering the ability to use our feelings to access ‘flow’, purpose and incredible inner freedom. Lisa works in her private practice and with audiences, virtually, through her workshops and as a speaker.
Lisa has channelled her passion for large scale impact into Bunji Global - a free, on-demand, not-for-profit platform that provides mainstream and alternative emotional and mental health support for people when they need it, without barriers to access. Through education and therapy that supports individuals to meet short term emotional needs with ease and effectiveness, Bunji Global aims to impact the prevalence of long term emotional patterns that disrupt relationships, foster mental illness and lead to PTSD.
Interview Highlights
Emotional Evolution - what it is and why it is so important Women have a higher tendency to share their feelings as compare to men. We want to become more aware of what our emotions are telling us, instead of reacting to our emotions. We want to become more empowered by having a better understanding of our emotions. For Athena women - logical, analytical and pragmatic women who spend most of the time in our heads. We tend to think our way through everything and not necessarily have the inside-out approach. We often expect or subconsciously want other people to meet our emotional needs. And what emotional evolution does is we seek to create connection and unity in every moment. We want to be able to communicate in a way that doesn't blame our partner or create division.Our feelings show us if we are out of alignment, and if so, we can ask ourselves, how can we own that feeling? What can I do to change my behaviour? What do we need to do in order to take our power back in creating freedom and relief? Use our emotions as GPSAs children, we look to our parents to meet our emotional and physical needs, but as adults, we need to learn and start to take self-responsibility as you are the only person that can ever meet your emotional needs.How to harness the power of love during COVID 19 and isolation timesUnderstand when we need to be reminded about true acceptance and when we need to communicate boundaries without withdrawing love.When you are burnt out - think about how to re-fill your cupBunji Global - a platform where therapists can donate their time so that people who need immediate health and mental support can access the platform to find a therapist without any financial limitations to block their accessThe reason it needs to be immediate is because the long-term problems of PTSD, suicide, social anxiety, etc wouldn't be there if we're able to reach out and get help.There are times we might not want to see a mainstream practitioner. You might need to see someone that can do past life regression or an acupuncturist. Bunji helps to level the playing field between mainstream and alternative health support.
When was the last time you played or change your routine?
We all have been affected by a prolonged period of uncertainty and isolation.
You may have aced your shopping or exercise routine or perfected the “work from home” arrangement, but after a while, the new normal feels stagnated because we don’t get as much stimulus through interactions with people in person or going to events or social activities.
You may totally enjoy this quieter time or have been super busy trying to start/finish many ambitious personal projects. But still, you may find yourself getting tired easily and feeling restless somehow.
No matter what, one thing is clear, we all need to replenish our energy and renew our mind from time to time.
That’s where Play comes in.
Why play is important to raise our energy
I wrote about the importance of play and the need to change our routine in my recent newsletter to my subscribers. I shared how I felt stuck and stagnated because of the lack of play in particular. For every short period of free time I got (it means went my baby is sleeping), I went straight into business work or household chore and left literally no room for play in the last 4 months.
Dr Stuart Brown’s book title says it all “Play: How it Shapes the Brain, Opens the Imagination, and Invigorates the Soul”. There is more to play then we perhaps have given credit to. As adults, we are taught to do more, achieve more, take more responsibilities and to succeed. Rarely we are asked to play more. However, there is evidence to suggest play is essential for us to live a more fulfilled and wholehearted life.
Play can be defined in several ways but here is how I see it. Play is something you enjoy doing without necessary carry a purpose, and often you don’t feel the time passing as you are so fully absorbed in the play.
“It energizes us and enlivens us. It eases our burdens. It renews our natural sense of optimism and opens us up to new possibilities.” - Dr Stuart Brown
Change your routine and try something new
Then there are the benefits of breaking up your routine When we are doing something over and over again, our brain is used to the neural pathways that have been established. The good thing is, we are getting better at whatever that we are doing through practice, but when we do something new, it gives our brain the opportunity to explore new and unfamiliar territories. That’s when creativity, innovation and excitement happen.
That’s the reason why we need to change up our routine or try something new from time to time to get a resurge of energy.
You may find my previous podcast episode #77 Good Habits of Sustainable Success and Higher Productivity useful if you want to get some ideas on forming new good habits.
The COVID 19 pandemic affects everyone differently, and it is hard to measure the impact collectively. But one thing is clear, more than ever, we need to take better care of physical and mental health, our energy level and resilience.
So putting everything in context, I have two suggestions for you. They are also reminders for myself.
Take some time in the next 7 days to play as a way to rejuvenate and recharge your energy. What is that you would like to do (or not do) as play?Think a habit that you may want to change, or to improve on so that you can become more healthy or resilient.
Please leave your comments below to let me know what comes up for you and what you do as play! I’d love to hear your stories.
Subscribe & Review in iTunes
Are you subscribed to my podcast? If you’re not, I love to encourage you to do that. I don’t want you to miss an episode. Also, I offer occasional gifts and early-bird offer of my programs first on my podcast! You can use this link to subscribe on iTunes! You can also find me on Spotify and other podcast platforms, just search for @SzeWingVetault and you will find me.
Now if you are extra nice and kind,
Many creative entrepreneurs I know are actually introverts. Therefore, networking in person or presenting a sales pitch may totally push them out of their comfort zone. Marketing for them can be one of the most challenging aspects of their work. For this week's podcast, I'd share with you a very candid conversation I had with Bron Watson about authentic marketing, networking, and how to succeed over adversity.
Bron Watson is the managing director of the eWomenNetwork International chapter. She is also the founder of Bron & Co where she leads a small and mighty team to work with small businesses on marketing in the areas such as strategy, sales, content creation and graphic designs. They offer both "done for you” as well as show you how it’s done service. Bron has a background in nursing and education for 20+ years and she had launched several businesses in the last decade while raising 5 boys! So in another word, she is a superwoman!
If you frown whenever someone invites you to a networking event and you have to keep telling yourself that you "should" go, or you know sales & marketing is a very important part for your business but you just can't shake that resistance, then this interview can help you to change your perspective. You can listen to this podcast via the player on the top of this page or go to iTunes or Spotify and look for my show @szewingvetault. Alternately, you can watch our interview below.
Interview Highlights
“Stay in Your Lane” - do your thing, don’t follow what everyone’s business can save your life and lead you to a better career/business that works for youSuccess despite adversity You don’t have to run your business or do everything alone - consider collaboration and have good “back up” or support system in placeSuccess means different things to different people at different times, ask yourself: "How do you want to feel?" and “How do you want to live?"Authentic marketing - showing up and bring true value to your clients with your product/serviceDon’t panic or think about what people think, focus on your own work and one step at a time - one post, one action, one commitment no matter how smallHow to excel in networking events and actually have fun Find your tribe and think “six degrees of connection, not separation""Be faithful to the small and the big will come"You are not what you do. You are who you are. It comes across in your networking or marketing message. Be true to yourself and others. What to think when you end up in a networking event that is not your tribe or you are not having a good experience.
Subscribe & Review in iTunes
Are you subscribed to my podcast? If you’re not, I love to encourage you to do that. I don’t want you to miss an episode. Also, I offer occasional gifts and early-bird offer of my programs first on my podcast! You can use this link to subscribe on iTunes! You can also find me on Spotify and other podcast platforms, just search for @SzeWingVetault and you will find me.
Now if you are extra nice and kind, I would be really grateful if you left me a review over on iTunes too. Those reviews help other people find my podcast and I’d love reading them! Just click here to review, select “Ratings and Review” and Write a Review”. That’s it! Thank You!!
Video
https://youtu.be/JkruWedvXQI
Transcript
Sze Wing:Hi, everyone. It's my absolute pleasure to introduce you to my dear friend, colleague, and in some way - actually, many - mentor, Bron Watson. And I met her not long ago, but she's just fabulous. And I just have to get her to be on my podcast because I think her wisdom and experience can help a lot of people like myself, busy mom, career women, entrepreneur, you name it, or people who are thinking about doing something outside their comfort zone. But anyway, I'm so happy to be here interviewing you, Bron. Welcome to my show.Bron:Thank you. Thank you for having me. I'm looking forward to it. It's exciting.Sze Wing:So, quickly,
Every now and then, I find myself procrastinating over certain things.
Unlike what most people may think, it is not always the overwhelming or really big projects that get on my procrastination list.
For those big projects, I usually know why am I tripping over mentally and the solution is nearly always about taking smaller steps, just to get the momentum going.
But I am talking about small tasks that have been sitting on my mind or my to-do list for a while.
For instance, I needed to schedule an appointment for my baby boy’s 4 months immunization, but instead of booking a time with the GP we normally see, I didn’t want to call and I had no idea why.
Second thing is that I meant to finish a chapter of my book with all the notes that I have prepared, but I just couldn't manage to sit down and write it.
The third example is that I kept delaying booking a ticket for an event for no good reasons.
But as it turns out, I found a really nice doctor closer to home that came with great recommendations.
Then one day I came out from mediation and got a light-bulb moment to change the structure of my book entirely. Soon after that, I came across the work of several other authors which made me more convinced that the new structure will work so much better and more engaging for my audience.
And of course, you may have guessed it, I actually got given a ticket as a gift to attend that event I mentioned earlier.
So why my procrastinations actually work on my favour on these little things?
Here is the thing, we live in a vibrational universe. If this sounds too out there for you, please just hold that thought and hang in here.
Remember in high school physics class, they told us there are 3 states of matter. Solid, liquid and gas. And even in the solid state, the particles are still vibrating, only in a fixed position. Everything in the universe, all matter is made up of energy, vibrating at different frequencies.
When we are feeling happy or elated, we are emitting or vibrating at a magnetic frequency that is higher than when we are feeling down or sad. That’s why the saying goes “The more you are grateful, you have more to be grateful for". It is so true because as a matter of fact, like attracts like.
It may seem off-topic, but actually we are not. Think about it, we can consider everything around us is, in fact, energy in vibration. When we are in the approximate of a certain vibration, we attract things or events that are in a similar range of vibration.
The Law of Attraction
It is the law of attraction. Many spiritual teachers talk about this, and the most notable one is probably Abraham Hicks.
It may seem hard to grasp this concept at first, but if we go back to my original examples, it also makes sense. I was looking for a better doctor, wanting to improve my book, thinking about the event. When I was in the right vibration, everything seems to just fall into place, or say attracted into my life/reality.
And that’s why, the idea of keeping our mind positive, is also a way to stay in a higher vibration. When we choose the path of least resistance, we are like surfing the wave, we move faster and smoother. We feel lighter and we soar.
If we pick the path of stronger resistance, say because we think we should work harder, stick to the schedule or keep to the plan, even though our inner being is not feeling good about it, we are not allowing ourselves to uplift to the level of vibration we can experience. That is, if I stick with the previous doctor, force myself to write that chapter the way I thought I should or buy the ticket earlier.
Our inner being is our vibrational GPS, and if it doesn’t feel good, it means we are not taking the path of least resistance and living in the highest vibration that is possible.
The Path of Least Resistance
In a way, procrastination is not a bad thing if we don’t feel our vibration is aligned with the best possible outcome,...
If you a coach, spiritual teacher, health & wellness practitioner, or transformational leader, then you would likely have attended or interested in hosting your own retreat at some point. Running a retreat can boost your business, it can also accelerate the outcomes for your clients/students when they immerse in deep experiences with you.
For this week's podcast, I talked to Tamara Golden, who is the go-to person if you want to craft your custom retreat to grow your brand and business. We recorded this interview during the COVID 19 lockdown time, which added extra desire for me to think about attending or hosting retreats in the near future. Imagine yourself being in a beautiful surrounding, connecting with like-minded people and doing deep transformational work. It is one of the most wonderful things I can think of to do!
I hope you will enjoy our interview. I surely loved our conversation as I learned so much from Tamara. If you don't feel you are ready to run a retreat, she also talked about how she helps business owners to "get ready" and strategically plan how to run a successful retreat further down the track when it is the right time.
Tamara Golden is the owner, founder & CEO of Journeywork Retreats, a full-service retreat strategy and planning company operating across the US and worldwide. From do-it-yourself courses to done-for-you services, Journeywork Retreats supports coaches and transformation leaders in creating custom retreats that grow their brand. Tamara has combined her 20 years in travel, event planning and coaching into creating Journeywork Retreats.
If you would like to get in touch with Tamara, please visit her website at www.journeyworkretreats.com or email her at info@journeyworkretreats.com
Interview Highlights
Tamara’s journey from working as a life and career coach for 20 years, then moved into the travel industry and eventually focus on retreats.
You'll need to strategize before planning a retreat. It is important to align with goals that promote long term business growth, increase revenue and client retention.
How to create a high-value experience, think about what are the outcomes for the facilitators and participants.
Crafting custom retreat to grow your business and brand.
Set up for success, how to get to a level that is “retreat ready” for your business.
Getting Retreat Ready online course - similar to a mini business coaching course, in the sense that you need to really know your target audience, target client and strategic marketing plan.
To run a retreat, you need 2 fundamentals: 1. Some clients under your belt and 2. Content materials to cover. Without that educational piece, it becomes a vacation.
Three key components for a retreat: 1) Educational content 2) Interaction with the destination and with the other members of the group and 3) Downtime - the part that many people forget to plan into. People need time and space for rejuvenation, for relaxation, but also to process what they're learning.
The difference between running a retreat and conference/boot camp and the business of bonding.
A retreat offers an opportunity to do more experiential inner work, it also provides a more intimate atmosphere, more access and time with the facilitator.
What it will be like post-COVID 19 in terms of events and the desire of in-person small group retreats. What can we do in preparation for that?
Video
https://youtu.be/sJSPV63Y-iU
Transcript
Sze Wing:Hi everyone. I'm really, really happy to introduce you to my guest today, Tamara Golden, all the way from the US. So we met in a networking event and we hit it off right away. And I'm going to tell you a little bit more about her, but I just want to say during this time, we're recording this in the pandemic time, and it is so amazing to see how we can still connect to one another. Obviously, we cannot see each other in person, but through the internet.
Have you ever caught yourself saying in your mind “I am not good enough” or "I am just not _____ enough"? You can fill in the blank with any word. It doesn't really matter what you put in. The effect is the same. This type of thoughts come into mind more often than we care to admit. The problem is, this thought does not move us forward but only to let us stay stuck, play small or swallow the feeling of failure.
Recently I had a phone call with a friend who was feeling depleted. And as we dived into the conversation, I realized this: She has been taking on the role of a successful entrepreneur, super mum, amazing wife, loving daughter and an awesome friend. On top of all this, she also wants to find more time to exercise, do yoga, meditate, journal, look after her appearance, change wardrobe, declutter the house, tidy up her home office, etc. As you can imagine, the list goes on and on. Finally, we both started to laugh. She is not alone on this. I have a very similar "Wish-To-Do" list, and I am pretty sure many women out there feel the same.
We have been trying to do it all for so long. We have been constantly trying to improve our personal and professional life, plus looking after everyone in our family. No wonder we are exhausted.
When do we say enough is enough?
Sometimes it is unconscious, other times we are consciously putting pressure on our shoulder to do it all, and do it perfectly.
Perfectionism and Burnout
No doubt, I am writing from the perspective of a woman. Since women now have more opportunities to have a career compare than say 100 years ago, we simply have added on the roles and responsibilities. Many women I know are working full time and it is not that we have shred much of the care and responsibilities as a wife or mother or carer. Yes, we may have more help in some ways, from childcare facilities to already prepared meals delivered to our homes. But the norm is we just do it and unless it is absolutely necessary or justified, we don't ask for help.
Women are conditioned and primed to want to be perfect in our modern society. This applies to our capabilities to serve and abilities to give, and also the way we look after ourselves. Just look around you, the advertising billboards, magazines, TV commercials and especially on social media.
When you browse through Instagram for instance, you will notice women look beautifully put together, often they are smiling or standing at someplace incredible or celebrating something worth celebrating. No one takes out their camera to take a photo of themselves when they are feeling down or looking awful. Perhaps only a very small percentage of comedians would do that to illustrate a point. We are surrounded by an artificial image of women out there at their best moments, and as a result, we are prompted to become the perfect mother, daughter, wife or friend.
Sometimes we get lost along the way. We feel inadequate, vulnerable or downright like a failure. Besides that, many of us don’t want to “border” others or make them worried, and so we don't even want to talk about those feelings or get in touch with what those feelings really represent.
So, we just keep marching on, improving and perfecting ourselves, until we hit a point of exhaustion or burnout.
Lately, I have been doing some research for my new book's title and cover designs. As I browsed on Amazon to look for books in my genre in personal transformation, motivation and women’s health. Something unexpected hit me.
There are many self-help books out there for women on making great money, having wonderful relationships, eating healthy, feeling confident, getting fit and looking amazing at any age. In fact, some books even cover all these areas all in one. So after 30 mins of browsing, I actually feel rather tied and clouded by this invisible and overwhelming feeling that the ultimate goal for us is to be perfect.
Don’t get me wrong,
I have always kept an open mind when it comes to healing, and I have no doubt our body and mind are connected on so many levels. When I first heard about Transpersonal Art Therapy, it sparks my interests. I remember Carl Jung said "Everything in the unconscious seeks outward manifestation", and I sense that when we express our creativity through art, we are allowing our unconscious to come through. It is like letting another language to speak through us.
Therefore, when I came to know about Karen, I think her life story and healing work will be of great interest for those who are seeking complimentary modalities to help them on their healing journey, or for those who are interested in art therapy in gereal. Before I interviewed Karen, I didn't know the difference between art in therapy verses art as therapy. So, to say the least, my interview with Karen has opened my eyes (and heart) in many ways. I hope you will find this interview helpful and inspirational. You can listen to the podcast, watch the video or read the transcript!
About Karen Curran
Karen is a qualified Transpersonal Art and Sandplay Therapist with interests in Art in Therapy, Sandplay Therapy, Music, Dance, Storytelling, Spiritual and Inner Healing. As a transpersonal therapist, Karen uses various tools and activities, including working with nature in a holistic way, to help the seeker/client discover their true self. Karen is also an artist and teacher. Karen resides in the Blue Mountains NSW Australia.
Interview Highlights
What is Holistic Counseling?
Why it is so helpful and complimentary to other modalities or medical advice.
Holistic counseling looks at the whole body and mind together as one. Many times when people have suffered, or had a shock or have been grieving whether it's a child or an adult, they don't understand what it is that's making them feel bad.
Transpersonal Art and Sand play therapy: working with our inner spirit
Sand play or art therapy for children - a tool for deeper emotions communication
Creating a safe space and a feeling of peace to connect to our heart and tap into our inner wisdom.
Drumming, singing bowls, chanting or music are all tools that can help us to connect to our inner world/subconscious
Karen’s personal journey from seriously ill to discovering transpersonal holistically counselling and then the right medical person
How her subconscious was trying to show her what is going on in her body and the incredible story of the medical discovery and her eventual recovery
The difference between art in therapy versus art as therapy
Karen’s online courses and offerings
If you would like to connect with Karen, please visit her website: www.KarenCurran.com.au
Video
https://youtu.be/Sk626OyGAns
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Transcript
Sze Wing:Hi, everyone. I'm really excited to introduce you to my new guest of my podcast this week. Today, I've got Karen Curran with me, and we're exploring one of the new therapy-- I mean, not new, but it's new for me that I don't know, but I'm really excited to talk to her about it.Sze Wing:So little short introduction. Karen is a qualified trans-personal art and sand play therapist with interest in art in therapy, sand play therapy, music, dance, story-telling, spiritual and inner healing. As a trans-personal therapist, Karen uses various tools and activities including working with nature ...
Recently I have been taking Yin Yoga classes and I'm surprised how much I love it. For those who are not familiar with yin yoga, it is a form of yoga that requires you to hold your posture for longer than usual and hence it gives your body a deeper stretch. It tends to run at a slower pace and it can feel like a moving meditation and highly restorative. The class may look very quiet and not much seems to be happening if you are just observing the class. But if you take part, you will realise there is a lot going on beneath the surface, both in our minds and body when we are TRYING to keep still and stay calm.
This reminds me of what Marianne Williamson often said in her lectures, when we go to the gym to workout, we train our muscles to be strong and so we can move better and faster. Spiritual practices like meditation or yoga train our mind muscles to be still and present. It takes time to build up our muscles and it requires consistent practice to stay strong. And it applies for both our body and mind.
How true.
To be strong inside and out, both body and mind, it actually requires both kinds of muscle.
Now keep still and stay calm may sound easy but it can be challenging for us, the busy minds.
When we are constantly bombarded by stimulations, distractions and stress that come from all parts of life, it is not easy to stay focused and centred. We want to keep moving and stay busy as a way to feel we are progressing and achieving more. However, if we act like a scattergun and running all directions, we actually won't get far.
Also, if we are too busy chasing, we may even forget what we are chasing after. What is that we really want? The treasure we seek may get lost in the pursuit, as we simply forget why we are doing it in the first place.
When we become still and quiet our mind, we will experience a new sense of clarity. We remember our WHY. We know and breathe our WHY. We pull back, stay on track and focus on what truly matters and relevant.
Going back to my yoga love story. 10 years ago when I first discovered yoga, I loved those highly dynamic classes that made me sweat and felt sore after. I wanted to see and feel the physically benefit right the way. The younger me wanted to control everything: career, relationships, THE FUTURE! I didn't like to feel missing out and so I paddled really hard on everything I came to.
Then one day, I was watching a detective show, and one of the characters said to the sidekick that she got to chill out, there are many tools in the toolbox and stop being a hammer all the time. It just doesn't work!
I know I probably have accumulated some level of self-awareness and life lessons learned at that point, but sometimes it is one of those saying that really put me straight to the point. (plus I love the visual of an animated hammer just banging and making noise all the time)
Fast forward to now, I am certainly older, and hopefully wiser. I have gained a different approach to life. Sometimes we need to move fast and push, but sometimes what we need is to pause or even pull back a little. Yin and Yang. In order to have MORE, sometimes we need to do LESS.
The Pareto Principle, also known as the 80/20 Rule or the Law of the Vital Few illustrates that 80% of effects arise from 20% of the causes or 20% of your actions will account for 80% of your results. Since not all actions are created equal, when we picked the vital few but do them very well, we may get to what we want or where we want quicker.
In order to know what are the vital few, we need clarity and focus. It comes back to my point all along that when we are still, calm and centred, we become super aware and hyper intuitive. We just know what to do. And more importantly, we then go and do it well.
Is there any area of your life that feels like you're speeding? Perhaps it is time to slow down? Or there is uncertainty and you need to figure things out? If so, more than ever,
Do you follow the moon cycle or chart your own menstrual cycle each month? I didn't know how powerful and effective it can be when we plan our work and personal activities in conjunction with the cycle. For example, there are days in the month that our body needs to slow down and take extra rest, which means the perfect time to reflect and recharge. Then, there are days we feel more creative or energetic and we want to get more done. It makes total sense for me to plan accordingly, but of course, we can't always dictate our business schedule but it is important to become more aware.
Let me tell you why.
If we know our cycle better, then we will have a more realistic expectation of our energy levels and give ourselves permission to push when we have a full tank or pull back when the best we can do is to slow down. This is about being strategic and wise. May I just say it is true feminine wisdom at play.
I think this is a really good self-care practice and a smarter way to look at productivity. So this week, I have an interview with Sharon Wood to share with you. We discussed the four phases of our cycle, how our hormones change and how to better look after our body, regardless of our age and where we are with our cycles.
I met Sharon through Perfect Potion, my favourite shop for aromatherapy and natural skincare products. We both sold our books through Perfect Potion and we crossed path many times as at masterclasses and festivals. Finally, I get a chance to interview her and discuss Goddess Wisdom in my podcast.
Sharon Wood is the Founder and Director of Emgoddess - an entity that is created to help and educate young women to understand and manage their menstrual cycles.
Sharon holds qualifications in holistic aromatherapy from The Tisserand Institute of London, combined with multiple certifications in Herbalism, Natural Fertility Management and Specialised Aromatherapy, Sharon has also worked as an Aromatherapist, including teaching aromatherapy at the Reflexology Academy of Brisbane and the International College of Holistic Aromatherapy.
Interview Highlights
Women cycle of life: We hardly talk about our menstrual cycle at school and the language around it tends to be rather negative.
The intention here is to create a more empowering and positive message around our cycle. By understanding our cycles, it can be very empowering for women
There are four phases for each cycle and the goddesses that are chosen in Sharon's book Emgoddess represent that and reflect the energy of each phase.
First, we have the follicular phase, then ovulation, luteal and lastly the menstrual phase. The four goddesses representing the phases are Daphne, Demeter, Persephone and Hecate in that order.
Our hormones changes as we go through each phase and it brings an impact to our energy levels and how we feel emotionally.
Daphne - our follicular phase is all about energy, and she's independent, focused, confident and with high energy. It's a great time to start a project or set a new goal.
Demeter - the earth mother, represents our ovulation and it is all about love and compassion. The high amounts of estrogen in your body make you very capable, and you are able to get a lot done during this phase.
Persephone - the luteal phase, which is the pre-menstrual phase. It got a bit of a bad reputation. Pre-menstrual make seems moody, feisty, cranky. And the truth is that we can be all those things, but it also is a really strong, passionate and creative phase.
Hecate - the menstrual phase, it is a more inward reflective and intuitive phase. It's time to sit back and think about how the month has gone. It's important to get more rest during this time.
Even if someone doesn’t cycle e.g. pregnant, nursing, peri-menopausal, it is still highly beneficial to chart the month by using the moon phases.
For hormone balancing, clary sage and geranium essential oils are great for a bath or diffuser.
Many of us have heard about the notion of "infinite possibilities" in the "quantum field". But What does this all mean in simple terms? How can our understanding of the quantum universe help us to create the reality we want?
I was always intrigued by these questions but I want answers that are grounded in spiritual wisdom and at the same time can be explained by science. Plenty of books and teachers talk about how to manifest, attract, and get what you want by co-creating your desired reality. Some teachings tend to be more metaphysical in language, while others are more pragmatic in nature.
After years of pondering and researching on this topic, what I’ve learned in short is this: The magic of creation begins when you integrate your intention with positive emotions.
I have shared this basic principle with my coaching clients and friends. Many of them (including me) have achieved some truly astounding results, for example:
A long-term single woman found the love of her life and got married in a few short yearsMiracle babies have been conceived.A client between jobs started making a six-figure income, while another broke the barrier from making 6 to 7-figures in his business.
For me, here is the bottom line: You don't need to believe NO PAIN - NO GAIN. There is another way to create new possibilities for yourself, but the 2 keywords here are "Intention" and "Emotion".
Please keep an open mind and let me explain with 2 simple examples here. Say, you want a new job or a new partner in a relationship. Both of these desires are “possibilities” because you can think or imagine them. The most important principle of the quantum field is that all things are possible and that is the key premise.
When you can think of a desire of what you want to create - it is a possibility. So, by default, both "possibilities" are part of the potential possibilities that exist as electromagnetic potentials in the quantum field.
Now, at this moment in time, when you haven't land that new job or met that special someone YET means that you have not experienced these possibilities with your 5 senses. This is because they do not exist in this space-time RIGHT NOW. Your new job or perfect partner exists as a frequency or energy that is carrying the information, but only a possibility at this stage. To change from a possibility to become our reality, this information needs to be tuned into and observed into this space and time. In quantum mechanics*, we know of this as the "Observer Effect”.
In other words, to bring the potentials/possibilities we desire (the new job or new partner) into our lives, we need to connect our energy (emotions) to the frequency of what we desire (that possibly).
*More on the Observer Effect can be found on the February 26 issue of Nature 1998 (Vol. 391, pp. 871-874)
Here is the interesting part; our body cannot distinguish if these emotions come via our imagination or from lived experience. We are programming our body to live as if this is our reality.
Intentions and thoughts are the electrical charges we carry and send out to the quantum field. When we combine elevated emotions such as joy, gratitude, excitement, awe, love or inspiration, which are the same emotions we know we will feel when we get the job or meet our partner. These feelings are the magnetic charge we each carry.
The combination of our thoughts (our electrical charge) and our emotions (our magnetic charge) creates our electromagnetic signature, also known as our state of being. We then broadcast this signature out into the field. When we find a vibrational match between our energy and that of our desired potential, we can attract more of that experience by being more conscious, more aware and more observant of that energy. This is how you experience fulfilling your desires.
The working of this is similar to the metaphysical concept of law of attraction where the key to attracting/allowing your desires to manifest...
In the last few weeks since I got back into exercising (postpartum), I have been totally in love with my beautiful yoga leggings and tops from Flow Yoga Wear. As I grow older, I love to express who I am, what I love and how I live my life. Perhaps I am becoming more fearless (after delivering 2 babies through intense labour, I feel I can take on just about ANYTHING!) and I want to enjoy life more moment by moment. Doing yoga and writing my books fuel my creative expressions and wearing Kylie's beautiful designs is kind of a sweet treat for my self-care practice.
With that said, you can imagine how excited I was to interview Kylie Morris, the muse behind this wonderful brand of luxury yoga wear for Every Body. I love the saying of "follow the flow, don't fight the current" and Kylie's journey of creating this authentic business is all about following the flow and taking inspired actions.
A little more about Kylie Morris. She is an Australian Designer and Founder/Creator of Flow Yoga Wear. Flow Yoga Wear specialises in bespoke, bohemian yoga and fashion garments that are designed, printed and made with love in sunny Queensland, Australia. The dream at Flow is to create clothing that will inspire and encourage women of all shapes and sizes to move their beautiful bodies.
That's me wearing Kylie's leggings at yoga classes and I am totally in love with the T-Shirt I just bought!
Interview Highlights
Kylie was recovering from a back injury which made her pause, taking time out and basically laying on the living room floor for 3 days - but then the idea Flow Yoga Wear finally took shape and it was born!
Yoga Flow Wear is all about making every woman feel beautiful, like a walking piece of art, no matter their size and shape. They reflect the individual personality and uniqueness of each of us.
When it comes to creating our dream business - we got to show up and start even before we feel ready.
To express your creativity or find your passion, try following your curiosity and interests. Go and explore, that action alone will create momentum.
Flow Yoga Wear was just a hobby at first, there was no pressure or hustle, just doing what she loves and her new designs just kept coming. She didn’t quit her day job in the early days and it actually made things easier.
When you are relaxed, and work from a state of non-stress, you become more powerful. There was no pressure of achieving anything quickly. It was just joy.
The feminine energy is receptive and relaxed. And from that space, we really can go in and create. Because if you're stressed out, if you're up here in your head, you see the problem but you cannot see the solution.
How to balance the business side of things while nurturing our creativity, e.g. give yourself permission not to do everything, prioritize tasks and be more aware that not everything is equally urgent and important.
Why it is so important to treat your creative work professionally
Lessons learned about connecting with people in person and online for a business.
To learn more about Kylie Morris and her designs, please visit Flow Yoga Wear.
Video
https://youtu.be/1YKD4M25pn4
Want more inspiration?
You may be interested to download my FREE eBook - 21 Days of Inspirations It is a compilation of short passages that will uplift your mood and nurture your spirit. Perfect to read when you are taking time out and try to de-stress!
This ebook brings you 21 passages of daily wisdom for living an inspired life. You can read it one a day to form a daily spiritual practice, or you can read it in any order. They are what I’ve learned and practised in my life for inner peace and outer success. Living an inspired and spiritual life helps you to know who you are, why you are here and what direction you want to go in your life. Get access to this eBook here.
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If you read any successful entrepreneurs' biography or listen to interviews about their success secrets, you will inevitability come across the notion of good habits or rituals that help them to gain clarity, energy or productivity.
I love the science behind good habits and I am always open to trying new tools and systems. There are a few evidence-based habits that I find particularly useful and I would like to share them with you today. I have personally used them myself and fine-tuned them over time. You can make adjustments to meet your individual needs, but the concepts are clear and simple to follow.
Morning Routine
Adequate sleep
Everyone knows the importance of adequate sleep. Research states that adults need on average at least 7 hours of sleep and recommends going to bed before 11 pm. If you are a night owl, or work better at night, do what works for you. You need to listen to your body. Sometimes you may need more than 7 hours!
No Snooze
When you hear your alarm clock go off, you need to get up right away. Please do not hit the snooze button and go back to sleep. If you do, you will likely to feel the effects of sleep inertia. Unless you have another 90 mins to complete a full sleep cycle, you are guaranteed to have a foggy start to your day.
Plan ahead, go to bed earlier you need to, but try to wake up with your alarm clock. Don’t hit snooze and drift off. Placing my alarm at the other end of the bedroom, forces me to get up to turn it off. This was a great help for me in the past. Now, since I want to avoid waking the family, I use the silent alarm on my Fitbit. This vibrates on my wrist and works really well.
After waking up, I get out of bed immediately. Try to stack this habit with another one such as making your favorite morning cup of tea or coffee or green shake. Have everything ready in the kitchen the night before so that you can go straight into another healthy habit. Make sure your good habits are easy and convenient so that you have a higher chance to continue to do them.
Plan Your Day and Track Your Energy
This is really important for me. After my morning cupper, I look at my weekly planner and plan my day. I look at my top 3 priorities and Weekly To-Do List. From there, I pick one thing I want to focus on as my top project for the day and brain dump any relevant reminders into my day planner (or any note book will do!)
For me, less is more. If everything is a priority then I won’t be able to focus on the most important thing. I also like to journal how I feel about my body and mind. This is my way to track my energy level. Not everyday is the same. I pay close attention to my menstrual cycle or moon cycle as I find my creative energy and productivity respond to the cycles. Some people call this the women body wisdom, and I like to take advantage to the days I feel energized and take on less on the days that I need to rest more. This is the most essential part of a morning routine for me and it takes about 5-10 minutes.
If you would like to download my personal FREE Weekly Planner, Daily Planner, Energy Tracker and more make sure you go to my website and get it there. They are in the workbook of my FREE audio program - see the details at the end of this podcast cast/blog.
Put First Thing First
This is a habit taken from Steven Covey's The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. I will never forget the video where the presenter asked a random stranger to place a bunch of big rocks and a bag of sand into a jar. Those who put the big rocks in first and then the sand managed to fit everything in with ease. Those that started to with the sand first, were never able to put all the big rocks in after.
I know many prolific writers have completed their novels in numerous 25 minute blocks simply because they cannot find hour-long windows to write. They still manage to complete novels!
Prioritizing and completing your most important tasks f...
Do you sometimes wonder why you have a repetitive pattern in your relationships or life choices? Have you ever considered what is going on in your subconscious mind? Or how does intuition work?
You may be intrigued by these topics but don't want to get into a "witchy-woo" type of conversation or simply find that too confusing to follow. I always like to put both science and spirituality together when it comes to learning and exploring these topics. It gives us a more holistic perspective.
That's why I am so delighted to share my interview with Tatz Holmes for this week's podcast. Tatz is a qualified counsellor, a student intern psychotherapist, mentor, triple P positive parenting practitioner, public speaker, and spiritual teacher
I met Tatz at the Mind Body Spirit Festival in Brisbane earlier this year. After my speaking gig, I walked passed her stall at the exhibition hall while she was playing her steel drum. I was instantly intrigued by the instrument and how captivating the music was. I cannot help myself but ask her about it. Within minutes I was blown away by her ability to engage in a highly intellectual conversation about meditation, intuition and our subconscious mind. All with both science & psychological explanations and spiritual connections.
She is clearly "fluent" in both "languages" and not only it makes the conversation so much more interesting and intriguing, I felt I've found someone who really understands the importance to integrate both backgrounds and the ability to communicate that to the world.
Tatz was just about to release her book "The Inner Art of You and I" and so I jumped on the opportunity to invite her to be my guest for my podcast.
Highlights
Integrating spiritual principles and knowledge with counselling and psychotherapy. Working with both mind and heart to help clients to heal and dive deep into their subconscious.
Process-orientated psychology - learn how to dream again. We start listening to the universe and to the world around us from a whole different perspective.
Using intuition to read Tarot cards - we use our inner psychic ability to see and hear and feel from the deepest inner core of ourselves and connect into everything that's around us
We may be isolating or social distancing but more than ever we need to connect to one another because this is a time to make the right decisions and do the right actions to support each other during the pandemic time.
Sacred Soul Journey - to discover our scared wounds ( in spiritual language)/core wound (psychology term) and the core belief that is the issue and symptoms of this singular cause.
Our problems and our lives revolve around this core issue. When we know what that is, we then know what we're working with.
Our core wound is not constantly in our awareness but it operates in the background and there is a whole belief system that comes with it, or holding us back without us knowing it consciously.
When we become more aware of our core wound, we can use different tools or strategies that suit us. For example, journaling can help some. When we catch our thought, we can make a decision to try to shift that. And that's where the science and the physiology explanations come in.
Her book "The Inner Art of You and I” - is an inspirational empowerment book to help people to recognise that they're not alone in their suffering and that there is light at the end of the tunnel. It’s also written to guide people through some of the processes and to grow in their own selves
If you would like to connect with Tatz, please visit her Facebook page
Video
https://youtu.be/Qwh6NHLoq8A
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Now if you are extra nice and kind,
Artemis is the Greek goddess of moon and hunt. In archetypal psychology, she is described as the archetype of an activist and protector. Women who have this archetype are drawn to nature and many of them care deeply about issues related to the environment, animals or women’s rights, children and those who need help and fair treatment.
Artemis women also tend to become more spiritual as they mature and attracted to the moon energy. Many Artemis women I know from my business communities are those who run purpose-driven businesses or are spiritually based healing practitioners.
As I write this blog post in the midway through 2020, I see many Artemis women rising to speak up or leading campaigns for making a world a better place. This year has been a challenging year for most people around the global. For those of us who are living in Australia, we started the year with the devastating bushfire. Then, we have the COVID 19 pandemic all over the world. In the midst of all these, we also witnessed the events of #BlackLivesMatter unfold. Never a time in my life that I have seen so many women, especially Artemis and Athena, working together to raise awareness, to champion initiatives and to rally forces to make positive changes in the world.
This is what I want to highlight today. Apart from being the nature-lover as we know, Artemis as an archetype is also what we called the "mother bear”. Artemis has been depicted in many mythologies themed painting as such. When things are out of control or when those they cared are threatened, Artemis will protect them fiercely.
We are living in a critical time, where environmental issues, sustainability, social justice and responsibility are brought into the forefront for us to examine. That’s why we need Artemis women who care so passionately and work so tirelessly to make things right for us and future generations to come. At the same time, those who have Athena as an archetype, the strategist and wise council, are the perfect teammate or in some cases, hybrid that make things happen.
I wrote about the Athena archetype a couple of weeks back, and some women who have both Artemis and Athena archetype active in them are highly empowered women who will change the world.
If you have these archetypes active in you, you may feel the urgency and the call to rise, to pursue your passion and purpose. The world needs you, more than ever.
So often we hear people say, they hesitate if they should start an initiative or a business or follow a dream. They are perhaps unsure about their first step, if it would work out or what people may think about them if they fail. The truth is, if you don’t start, you’ll never know. And even if the dream you have in mind does not turn out the way you wanted, there are always lessons learned and opportunities that followed.
We are so stuck in the “what if” scenarios and forget we need to be the change we wish to see.
So look around you, what calls you? What is the change you wish to see? What is the matter that you care deeply about? What brings you joy or sadness? Investigate both, let the curiosity to lead you to discover what your heart is telling you.
Both Athen and Artemis archetype has a common characteristic between them. They can focus and direct their energy to pursue a cause or goal they care about. Cherish this gift and figure out what is that you long to achieve.
Let your gift, talent and personal experience to guide you. Everyone has something unique to contribute to this world and make a difference. So don’t let anyone tell you otherwise, or worse, allow yourself to talk you out of it. Given we are living in such an uncertain time, it provides us with many new opportunities to right the wrong, or start something new that is positive and constructive. It is a great time to let love to trump fear, and to shine your light!
So think about 1 thing you care deeply about and consider what are the top 3 feasible act...
If you are a busy mum or career women, you can certainly relate to this scenario. It is almost 3 pm, your stomach is making noise, your back is sore and your mind is super tired. You just realised you haven't had lunch because you have been sitting in front of your computer for hours stressing about one thing or another.
Your mind goes: "Oh dear, I really need to take better care of myself"
Then, you got a phone call or SMS or email or someone knocks on the door.
Once again, the idea of self-care went out of the window. We forget about it almost as soon as we remember it.
When we don't have a good work-life balance or we let a project or person take over our lives for a time, our body will start to "talk to us" or "warn" us. We get headaches, backache, mood swing, insomnia just to name a few of the common symptoms. As our body and mind are connected, there is a lot we can learn from our body wisdom.
In my interview with Camila Sunshine, we talked about her journey from working as an IT professional in Brazil to becoming a diverse bodywork therapist and mentor for women. We explored what it means to have freedom in life, and feminine body wisdom. I love the part we talked about our hips, how it holds so much information and emotion for us. You can listen to our podcast, or watch our video interview. You can find the highlights of our interview and transcripts below.
Camila Sunshine is s fully accredited Remedial Massage Therapist and Holistic Kinesiologist. Her extensive skills also include NLP, Reiki, Coaching, Chinese acupuncture system, acupressure and Access Bars. Camila helps introverted conscious women in business to become unconventional leaders and create the impact they envisioned. You can connect with Camila by visiting her website or her FB page.
Interview Highlights:
Camila's journey of leaving her corporate job in IT in Brazil to discovering body wisdom in Australia. Now she works with conscious women with their business to become more integrated and conventional leaders.
What does freedom mean to you? Freedom to choose what you want to doo. What is stopping you to pursue your heart desire?
How do we discern impulses vs. true heart calling or our life purpose?
We cannot figure out certain things with only our mind, we need to actually explore it and have personal experience in order to know.
How do we know if our desire comes from our ego or from our soul? Is the idea come from the mind or from our intuition?
Our body holds a lot of wisdom for us. Many pains or aches or diseases come from imbalances in our life. Our physical body informs our metaphysical well-being. It is important to connect our mind to our body.
On a physical level, our hips are connected to our digestion and part of our support system. If the hips are weak, the muscles of our core aren’t working or our glute is not turned on, then our spine won’t be as supported and we may experience back pain. Also, when we are stressed, we tighten our butt cheeks!
On an emotional level, our hips hold our creativity. They hold our old stories, stress and stagnation. It is like a bowl, holding all things at the bottom. In a way, they also represent our flexibility.
Feminine wisdom: You have to know your needs, wants and desires. You need to be able to ask yourself these hard questions!
Movement is highly important for our body, it reconnects us and they are expressions of our mind.
Video
https://youtu.be/MrvsfXn5GiQ
Transcript
Sze Wing:Hi, everyone. Today I have my guest Camila Sunshine with me. So I'm really happy to talk to Camila. We met years ago and then we bumped into each other again on the internet if that's the place to bump into, right? So I was intrigued because she offers a lot of different modalities, and as we caught up, obviously, she's also on a different journey. So a little introduction, so Camila, in terms of, I guess now, we call it embodiment mentor,
If you have Athena as your most active goddess archetype, you are likely to be someone who is highly productive, organized and strategic. Women who have this archetype tend to value highly on their intellect, strong mind and rationality. They see the bigger picture and hence they have the patience for goals or projects to come into fruition. You can see why Athena women often achieve a great deal of success, both in career and their personal life.
However, all these advantages also bring in certain aspects or tendencies that may be challenging for Athena women. One of which is about letting go of control and allow things to happen on its own or take its course.
If you don’t know me, let me be very honest here, Athena is one of the most active archetypes in me since I was a little girl. My parents were happy for me to have an independent mind. I had my nose in my books most of the time and I caused no trouble growing up. But I can be a bit of a control freak when it comes to "How to Do Things My Way". When I was little, the occasional healthy arguments at home or my “know-it-all” attitude was actually rather amusing for my parents. When I become an adult, the Athena archetype also serves me well because I can focus on my goals and strategic about my efforts.
But now, as a mother with a newborn baby and a 3-year old daughter, the table has turned. I can exert very little control over my newborn baby. He decides when he would like to sleep, when and how much he would like to nurse and everything else that can throw my schedule or years of morning routine out of the window.
A few weeks ago we also had a false alarm of hyperglycemia with our newborn baby and we spent a couple of days at the hospital running tests and observations. That again taught me about keeping my head above water, stay positive and most importantly, stop fixating on the outcomes and how to assert control on the situation. There was nothing more I could do except allowing the doctors and nurses to do their jobs
You may or may not relate to my motherhood scenario, but if you look at what has happened in Australia or around the world this year, there have been a lot of unpredictable events and disruption of life as we know it.
Think about the bush fire in Australia, then COVID 19 and #BlackLivesMatter movement. There is a part we can do or can help, but there is a lot we cannot control. For instance, how others respond or react, or when the bushfire or pandemic will end or social issues be resolved. We just don’t have all the answers. Athena women in particular like a clear picture and know where things are going, but with these situations, we must become more flexible, and perhaps more importantly, change our expectations.
Certainly, we want to maintain our integrity and do our best. Athena women can hardly be passive participants in life. However, if we adopt a more fluid approach, follow the flow instead of fight the current, we may find more ease and peace, even at a time of uncertainty. We may need to adjust to the new normal and make the best of what we can.
If you would like to learn more about Goddess Archetypes or want to find out which archetype is most active in you, you may like to check out my earlier podcast & blog post about Goddess Archetypes and how they may affect our career decisions.
Do you have Athena as an archetype active in you? If so, how are you managing the disruptions this year? Do you find letting go of control or changing expectation difficult?
Share with me in the comments below or social media. I’d love to hear from you!
If you have any questions or comments, you can post it here or PM me on my FB page @SzeWingVetault or Instagram or email me at info@SzeWingVetault.com
More blogs & podcasts can be found on https://szewingvetault.com/blogs
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This is our follow up interview after our first podcast on Yogic Lifestyle and Living in Alignment episode. I wanted to talk to Belinda more about Goddess Circle, Women Rite of Passage, and building a community of women supporting other women. We also touched on the beauty and joy of women retreats she leads in North India, South India and Japan that include travel, yoga and wellness.
Belinda O'Dea is a heart-based certified Yoga & Meditation Teacher in Hatha, Mantra, Tantra, Vinyasa and Yin yoga. She is also an accomplished fashion designer and she is passionate about yoga, travel and wellness and that's why she now takes women on beautiful retreats several times a year to North India, South India and Japan. She is originally from Australia and currently a citizen of the world.
Belinda is an experienced Women's Circle Leader where she creates a safe, welcoming and inspiring space for all women to participate, to feel the connection and the importance of the sisterhood. She also offers personal or business 1-1 mentoring for women as well.
Interview Summary & Highlight
What is a Women Circle or Goddess Circle?
Magic happens in a women circle when we form a community of support with transformation, opening, speaking from our hearts and listening. It creates a very safe space for women without judgment.
Whatever happens in the circle stays in the circle, there is a lot of opening and sharing
There is a set of agreements to keep the circle to feel safe and scared. It sets the tone of non-judgement and it is not a public speaking platform. It is about speaking from your own feeling inner experience but there is no obligation to speak either.
Some of the agreements include: we all take a turn to speak, but only one person speaking at a time. There is no jumping in, no fixing or “helping”, just listen deeply and wholeheartedly.
As a result, we allow ourselves to free our emotions and express them instead of stopping them from surfacin
Women's circle is like "the other sister of yoga" because it's another way of discovering things about ourselves that don't necessarily arise normally.
Two type of circles: Open Circle (no fix or set number of members and come with broader questions, e.g. What are you focusing or struggling or grateful for right now?) and Close Circle (it has a fixed number of member each time and come more intimate or deeper questions as you get to know one another e.g. Spiritual Practice of Women's Cycle, Rite of Passage experience, initiation, etc.)
Rite of Passage: Birth, Menstruation, First Sexual Experience, Pregnancy (which can also be about giving birth to an important project), Menopause.
There is a lot of healing work that we can do retrospectively and there are layers of information and insights at each rite of passage as we explore and dive deeper each time when we reflect on that we’ve experienced.
Get to know ourselves in this feminine body, in this female existence, learning how to try and rest into being and accepting who we are through the practice of yoga.
10 Days Women Travel, Yoga and Wellness Retreat: North India - it’s like a spiritual pilgrimage, the retreat is called "Divine Mother India”. South India retreat is called “Living in Alignment”, it’s held at an Ayuverdic retreat centre and it’s about living in a yogic way and Ayuverdic lifestyle with workshops and daily massages and treatments. The retreat in Japan is called "The Art of Femininity", it is a cultural yoga tour where we take on different activities like flower arranging, calligraphy and also doing mindfulness meditation and yoga while staying at a Zen Buddhist temple.
If you would like to connect with Belinda, please visit:
https://belindaodea.com/ or
Facebook via her yoga, travel & wellness page
Video
https://youtu.be/_Gm9oQy5ySw
If you have any questions or comments, you can post it here or PM me on my FB page @SzeWingVetault or Instagram or email me at ...
Have you ever wrestled with the feeling of “not good enough” or “feel like a fraud”? If so, you’ve probably experienced the imposter syndrome. Those feelings are shockingly common but people just don’t often talk about them.
When I was training to be a coach and learning how to self-publish my first book, I found the feelings of self-doubt and notion of imposter syndrome are very common among my peers.
I think it is normal and even healthy to be mindful about the quality of our work. However, if you have been skillfully trained or highly experienced in what you do and yet you are consumed by the fear of failure or success, then it’s time to change that thought.
Why?
The world is missing out because you keep yourself away from doing the very thing you would love to do.
Perfectionism
There is a difference between making sure you are doing quality work versus perfectionism. If it stops you from doing what your heart knows you love to do, unless it is so-called perfect and it goes on for YEARS, then you may very well be in a rabbit hole of perfectionism.
I’ve heard a story about a panel of best-selling authors speaking at a writer’s conference. Someone from the audience said he has a book written for some time, it is kind of his “labour of love” and he would love to self-publish it but just couldn’t bring herself to do it because he feels like an imposter. The most respected and acclaimed author in the group said: “Don’t worry, I feel the same way, sometimes I think soon or later people will find out I am actually a fraud.” Then everyone laughed.
So even the famous author feels that way sometimes. But it didn’t stop her to pursue her dream. If she didn’t step out from her comfort zone many years ago and get her first book out there, millions of readers and writers would have missed out of her brilliant work. By the way, her first book wasn't an instant best-seller nor masterpiece. She becomes a best-selling author after many books and overcoming those feelings on many occasions.
Cultivate The Sense of Belonging and Courage
Sometimes we also feel we don’t belong from the group people we may aspire to become. You may say to yourself in your head “Who do you think you are?” or "There is no way you can be like one of them”.These people got X, they have done Y or they are friends with Z.
Yet, many successful people have those thoughts in their head at times, or worse, being told in private or public those exact words. But it is up to you if you are going to change the course of your life, or not.
I know that our personality can be part of the reasons how we react to this fear but a lot of it also has to do with our upbringing and social conditioning as well. When someone keeps telling you something about you persistently for a very long time or everyone around you accept that as a fact too, it is very hard to defy that. It is not easy to stand up and say: This is just NOT TRUE. It takes a lot of courage. No argument here.
Think about the time and courage it took for women getting voting rights, entering the work force, leading big businesses or getting equal pay. I am not saying it is easy at all.
But guess what? Courage is something we cultivate and build OVER TIME.
Sometimes we need to be pushed to the edge in order to find out we can fly.
Sometimes we grow older and wiser, we figure this out. We break away.
Courage starts to grow when we begin to embrace the imperfection in life or in us. Things may not go our way. Certain things we just cannot control. When we follow our bliss and listen to our heart, we are on a path of being true to ourselves. It may not be a straight path but it is the sure way to have more peace and joy in life.
Overcoming Imposter Syndrome
When you sense the feelings and thoughts of imposter syndrome are coming on, switch to these:
Henry Ford said: "Whether You Think You Can or Think You Can’t - You’re Right.
My guest today is Alexandra Gould. I came across Alex’s Facebook post online in a personal development /life coaching group, and I was blown away by her courageous journey with a very serious health challenge since she was six years old. Alex had over a dozen facial surgeries since she was a teenager, but nothing I've heard came from a victim mentality, only a brave and beautiful mature woman. She embraces her own vulnerability and adversity with such honesty and grace. I just had to interview her, so I reached out to her, and that is how I got her to be my guest today! I am really excited to share this interview with you. Alex is a life coach and mother of two (twins!) based in New Jersey, USA.I absolutely love our conversation, there is so much I’ve learned from Alex and I hope you will enjoy listening to this podcast or watching our video too. You'll also find the transcript below as well.
Interview Summary:
Alex’s journey of experiencing a serious illness that causes atrophy on one side of her face from the age of six.
What more than a dozen facial surgeries and recovery challenges have taught her over the years about adversity and victim mentality
How she got inspired to become a life coach to empower others who may also be experiencing hard challenges or tragedies in life
What she has gained as a woman and a mother by having been knocked down so many times since a young age
Despite all the challenges in life, there is still a lot what we can control, like how we respond to adversity and model for others
Why is it so important to surround yourself with the right people who see the best in you and the story of meeting her husband
Choose to focus on not just your strength but to accept who you are as well
Self-acceptance is a choice that we can make internally, no matter what is going on externally
We cannot compare the magnitude of a challenge from one person’s perspective to another, we must treat each other with compassion and respect
The first two years of being a mother to her twins were all about being on survival mode and then finding a balance between work and home life.
We are not enlightened masters who got it right 24/7 but we can cultivate strong resilience to bounce back and do the best we can
When negativity or anxiety comes up, instead of pushing it away, look at it with curiosity, ask yourself, what is it trying to tell me?
Part of building confidence is getting out of your comfort zone, and we often don't know what it means to others and we should avoid assuming how they feel
When you are nervous (e.g. public speaking) focus on your service or message. It’s not about you but who you can help
If you would like to connect with Alex, please go to https://www.instagram.com/coachingwithalexandra/https://www.facebook.com/CoachingwithAlexandraB/https://daretoprevailcoaching.com/
Video
https://youtu.be/ZpVbzR4SE78
If you have any questions or comments, you can post it here or PM me on my FB page @SzeWingVetault or Instagram or email me at info@SzeWingVetault.com More blogs & podcasts can be found on my blogs page
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Transcript
Sze Wing:hi, everyone. I'm really happy to do this interview today. So today my guest here is Alexandra Asanovic Gold, and I call her Alex. And a little short introduction how this all happened. Because I will say this is a slightly different interview in ...
As women, we all go through at least several transitions in life, some are brought on by biological and emotional changes, some may be due to new circumstances. In fact, they are all invitations to a transformation at different stages, in which I call that your Hero or Heroine Journey. Each journey leads us to encounter an unknown part within us or external to us.
I first started to share what I have learned from different teachers and personal experiences regarding our transitions in my book Goddess with Many Faces. I am about to complete my next book and I wanted to add on or update regarding this specific topic on women cycle of life and transitions.
One of the two key messages I need to add is about the importance of knowing your gifts and opportunities that may come with each of the stages in life. And secondly, how we must find pleasure and joy at every age.
Let me quickly take you through what I called the Women Circle of Life, or the Four Seasons of Women instead of a more traditional label of the “Triple Goddess” which many refer to as Maiden, Mother and Crone. I believe these days not only women have a longer life expectancy, but we also have more opportunities to explore our potentials and develop what our heart calls us to do as well. The Four Seasons of Women refer to the four stages: Maiden, Mother, Matriarch and Wise Woman. Changing of seasons symbolizes the transition we all go through and as we pass our wisdom and knowledge to the next generations through our family and friends, our thoughts and love live on. That’s why for me, it is like a cycle and continuation of life.
Spring: From Maiden to Woman
Each woman’s menstrual cycle begins when her body is ready to become a woman. This is the stage of the maiden which, like the season of spring, is full of youthful energy and a feeling of all things being possible. Although it may take a woman a lot longer than she would like for her mind to mature in the same way, she is being initiated into womanhood in a rather straightforward manner. Women’s rites of passage are built-in, as compared with men, whose journeys from boys to men are not as defined by nature, only by mental maturity. In fact, in many ancient traditions, boys were taken to a dark forest or cave to undertake a ritual in order to earn the rite of passage. Personally, I find the key of passage is about transforming anything we fear into love and courage. Therefore, when a girl or boy experience something that shakes their world, confronts them to face their fear and ask them for an act of courage or kindness, that in essence is leading them to a transformation. It marks the departure of a maiden and arrival of a woman.
Summer: Woman to Mother/Birther of Creative Pursuits
The next stage is summer when a woman becomes fully grown and becomes a mother. This journey is more complex as she is bringing a new life into the world. She doesn’t know how she is going to be as a mother, there is a sense of uncertainty in her psyche. Some women may feel very excited and ready for their impending motherhood, but some may be worried as life is changing and they have little control or experience to prepare them for it. They may also feel they need to put a pause on their career or they may be unsure how to balance the two. That is why these days many women choose to delay motherhood until they feel they are more established in life. I always suggest to listen to your inner calling and don’t deny an urge if it is what you want or rushes it if you don’t feel ready.
Personally I also had no idea how motherhood would affect my career or if I would be any good at it. All those concerns fell away as soon as my daughter was born. The birthing experience felt nothing short of miraculous, and all the labour pains were literally a rite of passage for me. Many of us, myself included, may overthink and try to control all kind of situation, even about falling in love. I would see love,
What is a Hero Journey? You may have read about it from movie reviews or in creative writing articles or classes. The term was first penned by the late mythologist Joseph Campbell in his book “Hero with a Thousand Faces”.After studying many years of myths across different cultures and ages, Campbell recognized a pattern or structure of the myths and he created the term a Hero journey to describe the transformation our hero experienced before reaching his ultimate destination. From a spiritual perspective, a Hero Journey is a Soul Adventure.
Our life story can be viewed as an adventure with challenges, lessons, tears, laughter and probably most importantly, opportunities for growth to become more than who we are.
Many Hollywood movies have followed this structure of storytelling. Most notably is perhaps The Star Wars (George Lucas has publicly acknowledged Campbell on many occasions as his mentor in storytelling), the Lord of the Rings or Harry Potters, they all have the Hero Journey structure in them.I got fascinated by Campbell’s work and he inspired me to start contemplating my own myths and my own Hero Journey as I began writing my books.
Goddess Myths and Heroine Journey
I love goddess myths, in particular, as I found them more relatable and can be highly empowering for women. Some may suggest we should call it a Heroine Journey as we are the Heroines in our stories. I don’t think it matters all that much, the most important part is for us to understand as a woman or man is that we have choices in our life, and through cause-and-effect, our actions will lead to different consequences.
From time to time, our heart will stir, and we know that something needs to change or we have a dream or desire that got ignited in our inner world. Then the question becomes, are we willing to take a risk and answer the call? Or do we play safe and refuse to get onto the adventure?
Inner and Outer Transformation
A Hero journey essentially is a transformation. There are two parts of this journey, one part is the external journey, say a Hero in a mythical story went on a mission to rescue the princess from the dragons or finding an elixir to save his mother. There is an endpoint. In our life, it may translate into finding a career that is meaningful to us or leaving a toxic relationship or a destructive pattern. There is a goal or solution we seek.
The other part is the internal journey. It is about the transformation of the psyche, the way we think and sees the world around us, our way to respond instead of to react. I wrote about that through the goddess myths in my book “Goddess in Many Faces”, the maiden goddess Persephone is a great example. Through her kidnapping into the Underworld, she has gone through a dramatic experience in which forced her to grow into a mature goddess. She found her voice and direction. She has become who she is meant to be.
Certainly what happened to Persephone is a traumatic experience and many of us do not experience that and there is no need to go through such pain in order to evolve and grow into a stronger version of ourselves.
The idea is clear, however, we need to learn from our life lessons or mistakes in order to reach our destination or the solution we seek. Your lesson may be about patience, compassion, honesty, worthiness, forgiveness, self-love or something else. Your lesson is uniquely yours and it is different from mine as each of us have a different journey and destiny to fulfilled.
Stages of a Hero Journey
In my interpretation, there are 4 stages in a Hero Journey and they are briefly illustrated in the following diagram:
Stage 1: The Call to Adventure → DISCOVERYStage 2: Initiation and rite to passage —> DEVELOPMENTStage 3: Transformation —> DEEPENINGStage 4: Reintegration —> EMPOWERMENT
At each stage, we will face different challenges and gain a certain lesson and grow from that.
What I love about this philosophy or perspective in lif...
Years ago when I was single and ready to date again, I came across a book called “Calling In The One” by Katherine Woodward Thomas. It is one of the books that I've learned a lot from and I can honestly say that it has helped me to open fully to love and become a woman ready to date! It changed my approach to find and keep a long-term relationship as well! I am a firm believer that if you would like to find a fun, loyal and caring partner, you have to become such a person yourself in the first place!
Fast forward years later, I am happily married. I got introduced to Katrin Dürkoop who is a certified coach for both the “Calling In The One” and “Conscious Uncoupling” programs. I got really excited to interview her as I wanted to share her work and these programs with women out there who will benefit from these incredible resources in finding love and keeping relationships alive!
Karin Dürkoop is a Personal Love-Life & Relationship Coach, she lived as an ex-pat in Poland, Sweden, Singapore, Germany, UK, and now in Belgium. She had a diverse career before, she has worked in Career Coaching, Human Resources training & administration and Organisational Development. Katrin offers Personal coaching for authentic communication and connection in Life and Love.
Interview Highlight
The top barrier to love is the distrust in love and in another partner due to past disappointments and betrayals
Reprogram our subconscious mind to open to love again, to overcome insecurities and lack of self-love
Becoming open, receptive and receiving love
Recalibrate your energetic vibrational field to become ready to attract someone new into your life, from a place of self-confidence and self-worth
Conscious Uncoupling: a life-changing experience, which can help to shift perspective, re-surface from grief and sadness, find forgiveness and a way back to life again.
Emerge from being single to start dating again with the help of a coach, with new perspective and without judgement
Structure and duration of each of the programs (Calling In The One and Conscious Uncoupling)
You discover more about who you are and connect again with hidden parts of yourself. e.g. What does romance mean to you? It can mean different things to different people
How to keep a good relationship alive, growing and healthy
Keep dating: Instead of spending energy on complaining, spend it on being creative in adding surprises and fun
Get a relationship candle to create a scared space and connection time to listen to each other
Taking a step back to nurture our inner feminine essence like going for a women retreat or circle of gathering or just spending time with other women
If you would like to connect with Katrin, please go to http://www.transitiontime.net/
If you are curious about your Goddess Archetypes and how it may also affect your relationship patterns or choices, you can check out my previous blog about What your Goddess Archetypes can tell you about your romantic relationships. You can also try out my FREE quiz to see which Goddess Archetype is most active in you right now.
Video
https://youtu.be/VxElSO_ni1E
Transcript
Sze Wing:Hi, everyone. Welcome to this week's new podcast. Today, I have a special guest from Brussels, Belgium and she's actually German, and her name is Katrin Dürkoop. I always get nervous to pronounce last names because I'm Asian, I suppose. It's so cool to be able to connect to international guests and today is no exception. So a little introduction, her website is called Transition Time and when I looked at it, I was like, "That's so awesome," because I can tell she also coaches women in transition and this is what I do too. But we work in a different capacity . She offers personal coaching and authentic communication connection. And she's a love and divorce coach. So obviously, she works in specific areas, different than mine, but I just love the website called Transitiontime.net.
Recently I have been trying out a “feeling good” experiment. The idea is very simple, I try to enjoy everything I do, no matter how small or trivial it may seem. Unless I feel good emotionally, I don’t begin the task as I consider myself “not ready" yet. And when I am on the task, I actually enjoy what I am doing.
This may sound counterproductive, but in fact, it didn't “waste” any more time than how I used to procrastinate or dragging on. I found myself completing my tasks quicker and enjoy them a lot more.
The Law of Attraction
I played with this "feeling good" experiment for a couple of fo reasons: 1.) I want to become more present and deliberately to appreciate all the good things around me.
This is all sparked by an impulse or more accurately I was being reminded about the law of attraction. I know there are things in my life that I managed to achieve, attract or attain effortlessly or with joyous effort. But there are things I just never seem to move beyond. It’s like fighting the current or swimming at a rip. I just couldn’t get there with brunt force.
So that is my reason number 2.) stop pushing or trying too hard and get what I want in the way I want it, but rather I allow the perfect unfolding to come to me.
My specific example here is that I found myself stuck in a particular part of my second book - working title "Becoming a Goddess" and it has been affecting my schedule to complete the manuscript. I am at a place that I can say I am 9 out 10 parts finished, but I just have a problem with one particular chapter and I was not happy with what I’ve written so far.
I follow a rather strict writing schedule and I am committed to writing every day. I did write but it wasn’t flowing and I wasn’t happy with my rigid effort. The worst is I am worried if it doesn’t “hurry up” my baby will come any minute and I will be “stuck” and unable to finish my manuscript.
The Path of Least Resistant
It daunted on me that I have not been following the path of least resistant. In fact, I have been resisting, persisting and pushing so hard to get what I want. Part of me was still hard-wired to the belief that "you have to work really hard to get ahead or succeed".
The more I want something to happen, especially in a certain way and specific time, I tend to get tighter in my control. That said, I also know first hand it is actually not about working harder but smarter, and there are times it is not that I am complacent, but it is just time to surrender to the universe and let the best outcome to unfold. I wrote about all that in my recent blog/podcast about surrender vs. trying harder.
What happened after I surrendered was I got this idea or more accurately, I got reminded about the law of attraction and deliberate creation. I got to be at a higher vibration in order to attract what I really want. In this case, it is writing with ease and flow. I need to remind myself and practice the art of allowing. In all these years of writing blogs and now podcasts, I never have a problem with coming up with topics that I want to write about. The ideas just flow to me through books, news articles, other podcasts, conversations with others and even in my dreams.
The Art of Allowing
I know the fastest way to raise my vibration and allow the flow of inspiration is to feel good. To appreciate and enjoy all the big and small things in life.
I am a firm believer that you can never control what others do, say or think, but you can choose a better feeling thought in your mind, and hence the actions or habits you create as a response to your thoughts.
I recognize this is particularly important right now as the news and social media is often about how the COVID 19 is affecting us in a negative way, how hard life has been for the collective and individuals. Certainly, it is important to take the situation seriously and be responsible. However, there are also opportunities to extend our care,
When our body is out of alignment, we often experience pain or discomfort. When our mind loses connection with our spirit, we miss the clarity and the deep sense of knowing. Living in our 21st century often means we become more reactionary and working at a pace that is hard to keep up without losing our spiritual centre. That's why yoga or meditation are becoming increasingly popular as many of us have experienced these effective practices. They help us to get still, stay calm & centred and block out distractions.
In my interview with Belinda O'Dea, we discussed what is a yogic lifestyle and how it helps us to stay in alignment. We talked about how to become more productive and creative when we follow our own monthly cycle or moon cycle. It is truly about embracing our feminine power and nurture ourselves with centring spiritual practices. She also shared with us her journey to transition from a successful designer to become a yogini (a female yoga practitioner), spiritual teacher and mentor.
Belinda O'Dea is a heart-based certified Yoga & Meditation Teacher in Hatha, Mantra, Tantra, Vinyasa and Yin yoga. She is also an accomplished fashion designer and she is passionate about yoga, travel and wellness. She is an experienced Women's Circle Leader where she creates a safe, welcoming and inspiring space for all women to participate, to feel the connection and the importance of the sisterhood. She also offers personal or business 1-1 mentoring and these beautiful circles for women both online and in-person.
Interview Highlights:
Her Goddess Journey: The changeover from fashion accessories designer and buyer into a yogini (female yoga practitioner), leading women retreats, Goddess circles and mentoring.
Transformation takes time to develop and deepen, allow your curiosity and inner wisdom to guide you
Finding life purpose vs. fulfilling a goal
What keeps us going when the going gets tough? When and how can we decide to take a risk in order to pursue our dreams?
The process of shredding and unlearning, then learning and sharing. There is no overnight success, but only overnight recognition of all the work prior to achieving your success
The yogic lifestyle is more than just doing yoga on a mat as a physical aspect, it is living in that connectedness and alignment
Living as a yogini with two main concepts: Ahimsa - non-violence and non-harming and Satya - Truthfulness.
Female energy force - Shakti - is our creative force. Knowing how to be connected and contain our own feminine energy.
Living in Alignment - Ayurveda and Self-Care retreat in India
How being spiritual and keeping up with spiritual practices can make you more effective and productive
Working along with your menstrual cycle or moon cycle for maximum creativity and productivity
If you would like to connect with Belinda, experience her wonderful goddess circles online or in-person, please go to her website:
https://belindaodea.com
or you can find her on social media @yogatravelwellness
Are you subscribed to my podcast? If you’re not, I love to encourage you to do that. I don’t want you to miss an episode. Also, I offer special events and early-bird offer of my programs first on my podcast! Subscribe to my podcast on iTunes.
Now if you are extra nice and kind, I would be really grateful if you left me a review over on iTunes too. Those reviews help other people find my podcast and I’d love reading them! Just click here to review my podcast, select “Ratings and Review” and Write a Review”. That’s it! Thank You!!
Video
https://youtu.be/F_t0Cyig4cs
Transcript
Sze Wing:Okay. Hi, everyone. I'm so excited to introduce you to my guest today. Today I got Belinda O'Dea with me. She's a heart-based certified yoga and meditation teacher with over 800 hours of yoga teacher training. She's certified in Hatha, Mantra, Tantra, Vinyasa, and Yin yoga, which is so many styles. And actually,
In a time of uncertainty, it is more important than ever to create multiple streams of income based on our existing knowledge, skills and experience. This podcast will outline my top 3 ways to leverage what we already have in our business or capacity to create passive income from creating long term assets.
As I coach and help women to become goddesses in all aspects of their life, finding success and abundance through their work is definitely one of these aspects.
Especially during this unprecedented time with COVID 19, I want to offer ways to help you the best navigate this experience and perhaps plants new seeds in generating more income for the future.
Many of my clients and friends are in healthy & wellness industry or service-based businesses so, with the current COVID 19 lockdown and social distancing measures in most countries we know, it greatly affect their business income. Many of them rely on in-person events like markets, trade shows, speaking gigs or face to face appointments. Many of you also like to teach and share your ideas. So this is a great place to start!
Many governments have released financial stimulus packages and subsidies, and they may have savings and assets to pull through this time, but regardless, the current situation leads us to think about how important it is to pivot our business model so that when they are unforeseeable changes, we will have some ways to handle them now or in the futureSo apart from moving your face-to-face appointments online, the following are other options worth considering:
Ways to Create Multiple Streams of Income Online
Based on your existing content from a workshop or in-person talk you can turn it into a book in multiple formats, for example, digital ebook, print-on-demand, workbook and/or audiobook.
The benefits of self-publishing a book include:
Compare to traditional publishing this has very fast turn around timeYou have a high level of creative controlIt creates long term passive income It increases your credibility and it is a respectable product You can sell it both online and offlineyou can use dictation if you are more comfortable to record your words than typing your words. It is also much faster that way.
Turn your existing content (your book) into a digital course
This has an even quicker turn around time than producing a book This requires more online technical support You will need to update the look and/or content from time to time It has a higher price point if it is a course with video, audio, transcripts or worksheets, etcYou have a lot of flexibility and room for creativity in terms of what is included in the course. You can even have live components such as Q&A or 1-1 follow up sessions as a premium optionIt will work better if you already have a website and online platform already
Collaboration with other colleagues and produce an online summit, conference, masterclass/series, support group, mastermind, circles, etc.
These collaborations can be live or recordedYou have a lot of flexibility of "What" and "How" and who you want to work withYou don’t have to do all parts, it is about leveraging your community and people you like to work with and learn from each together These events can be evergreen depends on the topics or they can be recurring events
There are more options of course, but it is the mindset about leveraging your own knowledge, skills and experience and diversify the range of product that you can share with others online and offline, more importantly, they can be your long term passive income streams.
Need Some Coaching or Mentoring?
If you want to talk about your options or what to bounce ideas with me, or simply want to get some coaching, you can email me for a FREE 30 mins coaching call (for a limited time - especially during the pandemic, I am here to support you!), I am more than happy to work with you!!
When we have an unhealed past and trauma in our lives, we often find difficulties in moving forward. We may experience plenty of self-doubt, anxiety and stay at a place where many may call the "Dark Night of the Soul". In order to have a breakthrough, we would need to work on healing our wounds in the past. In my interview with Taniya, we talked about the power of women helping other women, and why it is so important to have a breakthrough before we can fully pursue our dreams.
Taniya Hussain is a writer, Transformational Coach, Healer and Spiritual Teacher. Taniya was born in Karachi, Pakistan and moved to London in 1970 as a toddler. Her Professional Training is in Social Work and Psycho-dynamic Counselling. She uses the work of Jung and Winnicott as well as techniques from Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, Trauma-Informed Practice Training and Neuro-Linguistic Programming and Narrative Therapy in Social Work and Coaching. She worked in a Multi-disciplinary Team in inner-city London with children and young people in the Criminal Justice System. She had been doing that since 1997.
Interview Highlights:
Taniya's diverse background and her work in different social economic and cultural groups.The number one struggle of women she worked with across different culture is the feeling that they are "Not Good Enough".Transforming negative self-talk or low self-worthFlight, Fight and Freeze responses to trauma From surviving to thriving to creating an authentic way of living our lifeThe power of women helping other womenBreakthrough from the Dark Night of the Soul with deep inner reflection and naming, accepting and claiming the life you truly want to create and liveBe on that edge, feeling uncomfortable and find a way to relax and allow life to unfold - that is actually the edge of growth and breakthrough our own barriersThe ups and downs of any healing journey, the healing and answers lie within you
You can find more information about Taniya or connect with her at https://taniyahussain.org/
If you have any questions or comments, you can post it here or PM me on my FB page @SzeWingVetault or Instagram or email me at info@SzeWingVetault.com
breakthrough #darknightofthesoul #unhealedpast #trauma #womenhelpingwomen
More blogs & podcasts can be found on https://szewingvetault.com/blog
Video Interview
https://youtu.be/bBAwgyv3atc
Subscribe & Review in iTunes
Are you subscribed to my podcast? If you’re not, I love to encourage you to do that. I don’t want you to miss an episode. Also, I offer occasional gifts and early-bird offer of my programs first on my podcast! You can subscribe to my podcast on iTunes here!
Now if you are extra nice and kind, I would be really grateful if you left me a review over on iTunes too. Those reviews help other people find my podcast and I’d love reading them! Just click here to review, select “Ratings and Review” and Write a Review”. That’s it! Thank You!!
Transcript
Sze Wing:
Hi everyone. Today I'm going to have a new guest. She's based in London, so her name is Taniya Hussain. I'm really excited to talk to you today. Hi Taniya.
Taniya:
Yeah, it's Hussain. But it's really interesting that you started the conversation with Hussin, because Hussin and Hassan, they were the prophet Mohammad's grandsons and Hassan means beautiful, and Hussain means little beautiful one.
Sze Wing:
So I'm actually calling you little beautiful then.
Taniya:
Yeah, that was, I think sometimes slip-ups, they have a blessing.
Sze Wing:
And so happy to have you here and I first want to share a little bit about your background. Taniya was born in Karachi, Pakistan. But then you moved to London in the 1970s as a toddler, so a long time. And I myself have been living in London for quite a while. And I love the city.
Sze Wing:
And your professional training and background is in social work and psychodynamic counselling.
As many of us are in lockdown and social isolation mode during this pandemic time, I find the ability to stay positive and keep our mind focus on things we can control become more important than ever. Therefore, I have put together these top 10 Do-s and Don't-s for you to help you to navigate this challenging and uncertainty time. I hope you will find them useful and share them with your friends too!
DO NOT read the news first thing in the morning or last thing at night. The best way to avoid that is to keep your phone away from your bed. Leave it in the living room, study or bathroom.
DO 1 thing that will elevate your mind first thing in the morning. For some, it may be meditation (I recommend the Ananda App as you can customize how you like to do your meditation), journal your thoughts (morning pages), or do some inspirational reading (best to select the book or article from the night before).
DO 1 thing that will elevate your mood daily. Do something fun and enjoyable, for example, go for a quiet walk/exercise outdoor, make a delicious pot of chai or green smoothie, watch pets video, play with your baby.
Take good care of your health and well-being. When we work from home, we may slip into the habit of eating something quick and easy but on the other hand, we may find it easier to make healthy meals as long as we plan ahead. It is important to eat well, sleep plenty, move your body during this time. Many gyms and exercise experts have put up online classes or stream their usual workout. We may just need to create a new habit of working out from home after work instead of hitting the gym. It may be a no-brainer but often we miss the most obvious things when we are stressed or feeling down.
Connect with someone daily. Social isolation or distancing doesn’t mean disconnecting. I find this is exactly the time I want to reach out and check-in with my friends.
Breathe. Remember to breathe slowly when you suddenly get triggered or a sense of worry or panic creeps in.
Pivot your negative thoughts. Do not stay in the negative mind chatter and downward spiral. When these thoughts come up, try to pivot to another thought. Have a list ready. For example, if you have a tendency to say "I am so lost and stressed out" then think and say to yourself "I will figure this out. All that shall pass”
Do not overwhelm yourself with what-ifs, take one step at a time. When you are concern with multiple potential problems at a time, first pivot those thoughts then look at one problem at a time. Pause. Before you move on to the next.
Take action, but one small one at a time. When you are ready, see if there is one single action you can do about one single issue. What people tend to overlook is even a very small action creates momentum, once it is completed. So instead of trying to take a major step with multiple layers and moving parts, do one solid thing that you know is making progress.
Hope is where your strength is. Have faith, in a time of great uncertainty, hope and faith are highly important to guide us into a higher order of thoughts and actions, which in return will lead us into creating more positive and constructive outcomes.
Despite I created this list to share with others and to remind myself, some days I don't feel as positive or peaceful as I would normally do. But to get through those days, I rely on my good habits. I think one of the most important habits is to find 1 thing that you love to do and do it daily. For me, it is writing, as well as moving my body.
What I have discovered is that when I felt stuck, unmotivated and sad for a few days, the only way to really get me out of that rabbit hole quickly is to “write” myself out of that dark place, I feel the light in my heart and mind.
For you, it may be something entirely different. Cook something delicious, sing, paint, cycle, run, sew, clean the house, whatever that is pleasing for you.
We hear a lot about how we must take actions in order to achieve our goals in any motivational books or personal growth seminars. On the other hand, we also know about the importance of surrender. Sometimes, the way how things turn out is not up to our desire or control. If we are fixated to a certain outcome, we may suffer for that reason.
So where do we need to draw the line?
When should we pull back and surrender to the universe?
I was listening to a podcast last week and the hosts mentioned about the book The Surrender Experiment, and that sparked my intense interest.
There has been a theme emerging in my world since last week, the question of when do we say, it’s time to surrender versus we need to try harder?
I am very aware of the fact that surrender does not equal giving up, but it is about leaving to the universe, I have done my best, I let go. Then there is also the ideas of doing more or working smarter.
I understand sometimes the truth of the matter is, we need to put more time and energy in a pursuit or master a skill. Often times it means self-directed effort, determination, will and perhaps, faith in yourself. These are the times we need to say we should never give up. Spiritual forces may also inspire or encourage us to push through or endure a lengthy pursue.
So taking actions is also highly important. Again, when do we know it is time to let go then? Or if we are letting go for the reasons? What if we want to quit because we are overly worried that we are investing more time and effort but only to find out we are going to fail anyway?
Where do we draw the line between Self-Acceptance and Complacency?
I was also watching an interview between Brene Brown and Tim Farris about a similar topic. And they discussed this very question.
Where is the line? How do we know we are practicing self-acceptance, which is an important part for our personal growth, and at the same time, we are not just “lazy” and stay at where we are instead of moving forward and upward?
These questions have been lingering my mind for the entire week and I will try to answer it with what I know and understand, as well as from my personal experience. I’d love to hear what you may think about this as well.
Reading The Surrender Experiment brought tears to my eyes while I was reading the book within a couple of days. The way how the universe unfold its miraculous power and how the author followed the flow of life, and stepped away from his personal preference were simply astounding.
It is very clear to me that if he have allowed his emotions or ego or impulsive reaction to run the course of his life, he wouldn’t have found the meditation temple, a building and construction company, a multi-billion dollar business and had so many life-changing experiences.
The fact that he let-go and surrendered to life brought him joy, peace, friendships, wealth and incredible experiences more than he could ever imaged.
What I found really clear to me is that the intention to surrender to life is a guiding principle for his actions, but he is a hard working and busy man from what I’ve read.
It doesn’t mean he was doing nothing all day long. Even in his early years of attempting to live like a helmet and in solitude, it didn’t quite happened that way. There were plenty of actions and effort, but they simply do not come across as such. It was like when a fish is swimming downstream, it seems so natural and effortless to watch. The long hours he poured in to write his computer program didn't seem like effort or work. It was just him doing what life moved him to do.
It's not about forcing the effort, but to allow forceful effort emerge from our heart and soul
As I reflect on the “best” things that happened in my life, I realised they all shared a common theme. It came from no where that I could foresee, and it seems effortless to attain. However, before the opportunity arises,
In this interview, we talked about how to manifest with crystals and essential oils, as well as why it is so important to live in harmony with nature and respect the entire ecosystem.
Created by nature, both crystals and essential oils have a high vibration and when they are paired together and combine with positive emotions, they are very powerful support tools for us to manifest our goals or dreams
Manifesting relationship and abundance
For example, for romance and love, many people may suggest rose quartz as the common go-to crystal, while Adam recommended Rhodochrosite, which carries a different energy and intensity that helps with relationships as well.
He also shared with us a fun tip on how to use Citrine, a crystal that is well-known for attracting wealth and abundance, and pair this with bergamot essential oil. He uses this himself and money never seems to be running out since then! Adma also shared with us amazing stories of how these tools have helped him in his life!
Interview Highlights:
How Adam becomes the teacher, author and mentor for success todayHow crystals work and the use of this tool has stood the test of time and cultureWorking with crystals and essential oils together + amazing stories!Keys to manifestation: Intention, Emotions, Actions and use of these powerful support toolsColour of the plant and its connection with the essential oilHis books: Crystal Connections and The Gift of Essential Oils (with cross-references and practical tips)Mother nature is an ecosystem that needs our respect and careBushfire in Australia 2020: The importance of living in harmony with natureHow 2020 can be a transformative year as the fire also symbolises cleansing and opening the door/opportunities for more awareness
About my guest: Adam Barralet
Adam Barralet is a spiritual teacher, author and mentor for success. Many refer him as the Rock Star of the crystal community. Adam has been observing and living in tune with nature since childhood. Apart from teaching and working with crystals and essential oils, he is also highly knowledgeable with animal guides, tarot and astrology.
Connect with Adam
Please visit his website: https://www.adambarralet.com/
Books from Adam: Crystal Connections, Gifts of The Essential Oils
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mycrystalconnections
Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/user/adambarralet
Video
https://youtu.be/jmk4Z_6aEOw
Subscribe & Review in iTunes
Are you subscribed to my podcast? If you’re not, I love to encourage you to do that. I don’t want you to miss an episode. Also, I offer occasional gifts and early-bird offer of my programs first on my podcast! Subscribe to my podcast on iTunes.
Now if you are extra nice and kind, I would be really grateful if you left me a review over on iTunes too. Those reviews help other people find my podcast and I’d love reading them! Just click here to review my podcast, select “Ratings and Review” and Write a Review”. That’s it! Thank You!!
Transcript
Sze Wing: Hi everyone. I'm so excited to be interviewing Adam Barralet. today. French last name if I pronounce this 100%. I met Adam at a speaking event, at the Body, Mind Spirit Festival in 2019 We had a really good conversation and I know that he should be my first male guest for my podcast. So that's interesting. So I, this is the first time as I'm recording in early 2020. And you're also the first guest in the year. I am so thrilled to have you here today, welcome!
Adam: Thank you so much for having me. I appreciate being the first guest and the first male guest too!
Sze Wing: I want to first give people a quick introduction about who you are. For those who don't know Adam and he's a spiritual teacher, author and mentor for success and he runs a successful business. Please feel free to jump in if I missed anything. But I know that you work a lot with crystal and essential oils, actually many people refer to him as the rock ...
Today we are going to talk about the implication your archetypes may have on your romance and long term relationships. This is part of my new podcast series "Becoming a Goddess", in which I talk about Goddess, Archetype, Hero Journey, Feminine Power and how they all tie in and help you to gain a deeper understanding about yourself and decisions pattern you have. Two weeks ago on my podcast, I talked about goddess archetypes and how they may influence your career choices and motivation. You may like to check that if you are thinking about changing your career or trying to improve your current situation.
How our archetype may affect our romantic relationship?
Imagine you have the Goddess Athena as an archetype, the ultimate strategist, most likely a successful businesswoman or someone who is highly accomplished in your career or study of choice. You aren't likely to find yourself attracted to someone who doesn't have a care in the world, uninspired or just living life through motion, right?
Or as an Artemis incarnate, think of someone who is passionate about protecting our environment, bringing justice to our society, rescuing animals in nature or helping women or children in poverty. A woman who works for the right cause and vision. Do you think you will fancy someone who is putting corporate profit first or being lightweight on moral and social justice? No way, right?
I think you can see where I am going with this. Your archetypes affect your personal interests, behavioural patterns, intellectual and emotional responses as well as decision making.
What is an archetype?
In a nutshell, archetypes are our inner patterns, they reflect our unconscious choices, inclination, interests and personalities. If we understand our own archetypal influences, we can understand how we related to others and the decisions we make. By discovering our archetypes, it helps us to better understand ourselves. I wrote about the six Greek Goddess Archetypes extensively in my first book Goddess with Many Faces and today I want to focus on how they affect our relationships.
Just to mention the reason I use Goddess Archetypes is that I love the Goddess myths, they reflect the complexity of women and yet we can understand, relate and resonate with them. Many people use other archetypes, some use the Tarot system, some focus on a few women at different stages of life. I like Goddess and I found them highly relatable when I use them to explain to my coaching clients.
Anyway, the key is this - you are born with certain goddess archetypes that are dominant in your psyche, however, it may change due to your circumstances or personal growth. So, basically both nature and nurture play a part.
Now, going back to your relationship pattern, how is it helpful for us in terms of choosing our partners or creating a relationship?
Understand Your Relationship Pattern
First of all, knowing our inner patterns makes a huge difference in terms of understanding what we need to be mindful of or why we tend to fall into certain patterns.
Go back to Athena's example, she is strong-minded, a highly intellectual person, and often in a sense, disconnected from her emotional and physical body. So for an Athena entering a new stage in life where she is looking for personal growth, she may find herself in a new relationship with someone who has the capacity to support her to tune in with her inner wisdom or to encourage her to slow down in life. She may never think that will be a man or woman she would like to enter a relationship with, but she may not be aware she is also changing herself so that is in fact really helpful for her.
Would she likely to push him away or find it hard to comprehend the attraction at the beginning? Most likely, because he is different or even uncomfortable for her.
Considerations for a Long Term Relationship
Now think about the archetype of Demeter, the mother and nurturer.
My 3-year- old sings and dance at her childcare and at home every day. I can see that she loves to naturally express her emotions and add all kind of imagination into her "performance". She is so happy and free when she does that. I prompted me to ask myself:
How often do we allow ourself to play, be goofy and be truly ourselves?
When was the last time you sing out loud even when we don't really know the lyrics or sure about the exact melody?
At what age we start to put that lid on ourselves, and no longer let ourselves to be free?
In my interview with Trish Watts, we talked about how singing is so freeing and nurturing for us. Especially when we have sadness or suffering stored as pain in our body. Not only it is healing, but it can also help us to connect and appreciate another human being. We also talked about InterPlay, an improvisation-based group play that uses storytelling, singing, dance, movement and stillness. I love how it helps people to open up and be free with themselves in the process.
Trish Watts is a singer, songwriter, and educator with extensive experience as a performing artist, voice movement therapy facilitator in Australia and overseas. Trish Co-Founded InterPlay® Australia, a community arts practice of almost years, and is a published songwriter and recording artist. She is co-created the startup of Cambodia Sings. She also partners with Empowering Youth Cambodia, the Music Arts School and Liger Learning Centre.
Episode Notes:
Discover voice movement therapy as a way to express our emotions, explore our unconscious mind and our shadows in a safe and positive place.
If you consider our mind is in our head and emotion is in our heart, voice is right in the middle. If one part says yes, the other says no, there is a constriction. Working with our voice can move it through and combine the two together.
Emotional suffering can cause our body a lot of pain, singing can help to free up our body.
Use breathing and soft singing to open up a dialogue to understand where the pain is stored in our body and to better understand what that pain is about. What aspect of human nature that represents?
InterPlay has been established as a practice to unlock our body wisdom for about 30 years. It is an improvisational group play that involves storytelling, singing, dance, movement and stillness.
It helps people to work on connection and "just takes the lid off". You can then actually appreciate the beauty of being human and the beauty of another human being in front of you and who they are.
Why it is so nurturing when we allow ourself to play and be free from judgement.
Cambodia Sings: A youth program to bring back the joy of singing and the love of singing for all of Cambodians.
If you would like to connect with Trish Watts or any of the work we mentioned, please visit:
Trish Watts Soul Voice on Facebook
Voice Movement Therapy -Oceania
InterPlay Australia
Cambodia Sings and its Facebook Page
If you would like to get more coaching tips on becoming a goddess at work and home, join my newsletter so that you won't miss out any free workshops, podcasts or live videos! Sign up here.
More blogs & podcasts can be found on https://szewingvetault.com/blogs
https://youtu.be/3VJ966sXep0
Subscribe & Review in iTunes
Are you subscribed to my podcast? If you’re not, I love to encourage you to do that. I don’t want you to miss an episode. Also, I offer occasional gifts and early-bird offer of my programs first on my podcast! Click here to subscribe in iTunes!
Now if you are extra nice and kind, I would be really grateful if you left me a review over on iTunes too. Those reviews help other people find my podcast, and I’d love reading them! Just click here to review, select “Ratings and Review” and Write a Review”. That’s it! Thank You!!
Transcript
Sze Wing: Hi. Welcome to my show, Trish. Today, I have a really interesting guest.
What is your Goddess Archetypes?
First of all, you may ask what an archetype is. If you are a fan of Carl Jung, the Swiss scholar, psychologist and psychiatrist, you may be familiar with the terms such as archetype or collective unconscious. In my first book Goddess with Many Faces, I wrote about 6 Greek Goddess Archetypes: Athena, Artemis, Demeter, Persephone, Hera and Aphrodite. They are among the most well-known Greek goddesses in our popular culture, many of us are familiar with their images or myths. They each have a very distinctive archetypal influence.
I want to revisit these goddesses as I now have more to share with you and as I am writing my second book called Being a Goddess. I am going to do this is as a multiple part series. Today I want to talk specifically about our career motivation and inner calling for women based on these goddess archetypes.
How does your archetype affect your career?
So here is the context, archetypes are our inner patterns, they reflect our unconscious choices, inclination, interests and personalities. If we understand our own archetypal influences, we can understand how we related to others and why we are, the way we are. By discovering our archetypes, it helps us to better understand ourselves. You'll notice use the plural form to describe our active archetypes. This is because although we have one dominant archetype at any given time in our life, we can also see we have traces of other archetypes in us too. Also, as we grow and mature, the most active archetype in us may change. And both, nature and nurture play a part in this, it is not just we are born with one dominant archetype, and that's it.
In any case, you will know what I mean when we go through a brief overview of these archetypes in this podcast. I will talk about the typical career choices and tendencies for each goddess archetype. Also, what qualities of a job or career will motivate each archetype and inspire a more fulfilling career.
I use Goddess archetypes because I found their myths really resonate with our women experiences. Also, many of us are familiar with their stories, and the message can really hit home quickly. There are many archetypes out there, but I only focus on these six here.
Athena: Goddess of Wisdom
Athena Archetype: The Strategist
In mythologies, Athena's father is Zeus, the chief God of Olympus, her mother is Metis, the goddess of wisdom also. Zeus values Athena highly and untrusted her with his symbols of power, in which no other gods or goddesses had that privilege. Athena appears in many epic hero stories alongside Odysseus or Hercules. She provided them with wise counsel and caution them with danger. I don't have time to go through the myths here, but they are fascinating to read. Once again, in you love myths, you can find more details and stories in my book Goddess with Many Faces, of course!
Athena was known for her intellect, wisdom, winning strategies and practical solutions. As an archetype, Athena is patient, she sees the whole picture, she is focused and efficient. Athena values rational thinking, will and knowledge over instinct and nature. This pattern is followed by logical women, who are ruled by their heads rather than their hearts. She thrives in the city and patriarchy culture and organisations. She is the "father's daughter", an Athens's father is always very proud of her achievement. Growing up, she also rarely gives anyone any trouble as she merely concentrates on her own studies or pursues.
There are some Athena's who are shaped by circumstances but in nature, for instance, absent parents, challenging childhood or a lot of young siblings. As she is highly independent and a strong leader.
When Athena represents only one of several archetypes active in a woman rather than a single dominant pattern, this archetype can be a great ally of other goddesses.
Career Choices/Tendencies for Athena:
What does the word "Goddess" mean to you?
Since I completed my first book, Goddess with Many Faces, I felt it was like the end of a beginning. As I completed the book, I knew I need to do a follow-up book that will help women to apply what they have discovered about themselves, their archetypes, their innate feminine power and wisdom, and take it another step further and apply them the context and practice of key areas of their everyday life.
And that is how the idea of my current book, Becoming a Goddess was born. In the last few months, I have been doing a lot of research, learning and interviewing different experts and coaches, and that’s why I am doing this new series of the podcast "Becoming A Goddess". I want to share my insights and what I’ve learned from other coaches and experts in the field.
A Goddess is the embodiment of an inspired and empowered woman, who is called to create a life she loves, to find success and joy in both her career and personal life, which includes healthy relationships and personal well-being.
A woman who looks after herself and grow into even wiser, more beautiful and powerful inside and outside as she matures. She embraces her feminine power, goddess wisdom and become a radiant, magnetic, nurturing and creative woman. This is what Becoming a Goddess is about.
I want the book to be inspiring and useful for women who want to create the life they truly love.
3 Keys to becoming more Inspired, Empowered and Radiant
In this episode, I will share with you the 3 keys that are common practices among the women I've interviewed, who have achieved what they could only dream of a few years back, and they are women whom I can call have now become a woman that they always wanted to be, a Goddess. 3 keys I find that have helped many women I interviewed who have achieved what they dreamt of a few years back, and people whom I would call have now become a woman they always wanted to be, a Goddess.
I want you to remember - YES, you can have it all, and you are more than you know. From all my research and interviews with truly inspiring women, here are the top 3 common things I want you to know right now:
Know who you are - what truly matters to your heart.
When you know yourself better, what really motivates you, what scares you and if you have a dream, know your “ Why", all that gives you clarity, and then priority to make progress in areas that will fill the gaps and help to you get you where you want to be. Knowing your archetypes help. Understand your motivation and interests help. If you don’t know what you deeply want, think about what keeps you curious, what makes you eager to learn and what you like to do that you will lose track of time.
Break Down Your Big Dream into Small Tangible Steps
When something you want to change, do or accomplish seems so important and so big, to the point where you feel stuck or paralyzed with the fear. You need to break it down to one tiny small step at a one. One action item, something you can do in 15-30 mins. And do it Today. Schedule it. Commit to it. Once you are done, the next tiny step. You need to take action to create the momentum and that will eventually move you forward away from confusion or anxiety.
Make time for your life
There are always more work or to-do lists waiting for you, but if you don’t make time for yourself, just you, to really tune in to what your heart is telling you or take time to heal and nurture your body, mind and spirit. It is very hard to know what really matters to you if you are just constantly running after your to-do lists.
Same with key #2, you need the 15-30 mins to take action for your dream, that is time cannot be robbed by other tasks that don’t matter as much. Wake up 30 mins early in the morning. Take a lunch break outside your office. Stop by a cafe 30 mins after work before going home. Schedule time out in the weekend. Just slow down and be you.
I remember those days when I was single, losing my patience and feeling sorry over unsuccessful relationships. I was not sure how to go back to dating and felt totally stuck at where I was.
I wish I have met Crista back then!
She made it sounds so fun and got me super excited about dating again! Well, this is more for the single ladies out there, as I am happily married, but I cannot help it but to cheer you on the side!
If you are single and wondering how can you find real love, then this episode is totally for you!
Crista Beck is a love & dating expert & coach with over 10+ years of experience in helping single women to find true love in real life. Her message has been heard by over a million people globally. Crista Beck, known as the “Love Radar” has been featured on ABC, NBC, FOX, and TEDx. She is the author of the bestselling book, Break The Glass Slipper: Free Yourself of Fairytale Fantasies and Find True Love In Real Life.
In this paradigm-shifting dating guide, Crista Beck shows us how to stop Hollywood and Disney from ruining our love lives so we can find love in real life. Break The Glass Slipper is her antidote to the myths about the process of dating that have infected modern society and the minds of single people, sabotaging our ability to attract a healthy and happy long-term relationship.
It was an absolute joy to interview Crista and talked about dating coma and fairytale fantasies. What she has discovered with her years of experience she put into the book and her coaching work to help women getting back to their date scene. She coaches women to find healthy long-term relationships.
She makes dating sounds so fun and “do-able” especially for those who may have been put off or haven’t been dating for 2, 5 or even 10 years!
It is all about taking the baby step!
If you would like to take a baby step towards your next relationship today, you can also take her free Love IQ quiz at https://datingiqquiz.com
Or you can get her book Break The Glass Slipper: Free Yourself of Fairytale Fantasies and Find True Love In Real Life here at http://cristabeck.com/break-the-glass-slipper/
If you would like to contact Crista Beck and learn more about her work and coaching, please visit http://cristabeck.com/
Episode Notes:
In Break the Glass Slipper, you expose the societal fantasies about dating and relationships. How did you discover these? What are the top unhealthy fantasies that single women buy into?How do we truly know who and what qualities we want? What do you say to “He is not my type” when we don’t even know our type or we think we know? How can our single listeners/viewers find love (even If they are not meeting the right people)? THE single most important thing we need to know in order to find real love.
For more blogs & podcasts can be found on https://szewingvetault.com/blogs
https://youtu.be/ObiujcphNNc
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Transcript
Sze Wing: Hi everyone. I am so happy to be doing this interview with Crista Beck, a love & dating expert & coach with over 10+ years of experience. I'm so excited, really. I wanted to talk to a love and dating expert and coach for ages. And then you came through with so many recommendations and I know that you're also an author with your book, "Break The Glass Slipper". So I'm just so thrilled. So first of all, welcome Crista.
Crista: Thank you for having me.
Sze Wing: I have already jumped the gun and me...
As Valentines Day and my wedding anniversary (13th February) are fast approaching this week,, I can't help but think about my marriage.
Valentines Day is the busiest day of my husband's business, therefore we never get to celebrate that or our anniversary on the day but we try to make a point to spend some quality time together later in weekend or after.
2019 marks a big year for us, we have been physically and emotionally challenged in so many ways and it certainly asks for a stronger and more supportive relationship. So, I thought to myself, what can I learn from all these valuable lessons and if anything that comes up useful, I'd share them on my podcast. So that's what prompted me to talk about in this week's podcast.
For me, the following 5 tips are what really helped me and my husband to get through insanely busy work schedule, long-distance travels and blindspots.
- Embrace Vulnerability and Imperfection
I was reading Brene Brown's book Daring Greatly, and one of the stories about a man who came up to her after a talk about how hard it is for men to share about shame and vulnerability deeply touched me. How he viewed his wife and daughter couldn't bear the sight or the thoughts of him if he would crumbling down in tears right there. Another one talked about how he couldn't tell his wife he was been lay off from work for quite some time, he just went to the cafe during work hours to find a new job. His Dad, brother and close male friends knew, he just couldn't tell his wide. He said: "She didn't sign up for this."
I talked about the stories I read in the book with my husband and I said to him: "If work becomes too stressful, or you feel overwhelmed with too much weight on your shoulder or something "bad" happened, you got to talk to me. I didn't just sign up for this, I signed up for more". I don't care if we need to sell the house or be creative with things, I don't want to lose him on the inside.
I think it is important to know what you truly value in life, hence, fear to lose the most. It is confronting and uncomfortable to feel vulnerable, but that is also a way to live with love and courage.
It is one thing to tell our husband or boyfriend that we want them to open up and share more about their feelings and fears, but when it comes to the hard truth, many men believe we may not be able to bear it or even actually want to hear the hard truth. So we need to be honest with ourselves as well. Are we willing to feel vulnerable, to face our own imperfection, character default, mistakes, fears and most importantly, are we there for THEM for the long run.
You don't stumble into a warm and cozy relationship, you need to work on it. You may be lucky enough and stumble into a suitable candidate to commit to cultivate one.
If you want to feel more connected with your boyfriend/partner/husband, you got to be in the arena, whether it is about wrestling with your own vulnerability and share that with him or listen and respect his. You got to be there and let him know that too.
- Be clear and committed with your work and personal boundaries
If you want a good work-life balance, personal & spiritual growth and massive success with your work, this is probably the number one commitment to nail.
For some, this may mean the number of days/weeks you are willing to travel away from home for work, or how many hours you spend in the office vs. home, whether or not you work in the weekend and if so, what are the rules or frequency that you allow it. What time at night you will stop taking work calls and telling your colleagues aware of that as well.
For others, it may mean no mobile device during dinner or "together" time, or arrange certain morning coffee time or a nightcap with your spouse if they work in shifts. It can be about scheduling in family vacation months in advance to ensure you get time off work.
You probably have very different boundaries you want to set,
Are you surprised if I tell you one in four (25%) Australians are unhappy in their job?
This number comes from an article published on Human Resources Director in August 2019, based on a new research commissioned by the Nutritional Therapy Association of Australia (NTA). A staggering 70% of those unhappy employees wanting to pursue a different career.
If you feel unhappy artwork, you are not alone.
Why so many people are unhappy at work?
It may not come as a surprise that the three main contributing factors are: not-enough pay, office politics and work not being challenging enough.
There are many studies or reviews out there that outline the reasons on top of the three factors I mentioned above. For example, lack of recognition or appreciation, inadequate of training & development and distrust of leadership seem to be some most common reasons.
You may also hear from your friends or read from the social media posts that more and more people want to be able to spend quality time with their families, have a better lifestyle and find more fulfilling work.
The statistics back that up too, about 68% of people are seeking a career that can offer a better work-life balance and 47% want to work in a career that they are actually passionate about.
But wait a minute, apart from these external factors that we may not be able to control, is there anything else we need to consider?
Yes, there are!
Intrinsic Factors For Fulfillment at Work
There are some intrinsic factors that are key to our fulfilment at work.
We spend a lot of time at work and we need to consider our interests, motivations, needs, values, skills, and previous professional experiences that shape our expectation and satisfaction at work.
It may not be a common practice to ask ourselves questions related to these factors and it often takes a little time and effort to gather insights about who we are and what do we really want.
Another really important thing to consider is that we change as we grow physically, emotionally and spiritually.
What seems to be fulfilling or challenging or fun when you are in your 20s can be drastically different when you are in your 40s.
If you are like me, there was a time when the idea of becoming a mother seems so far away, while travelling (and partying!) around the world and working 100 hours a week has a certain thrill and excitement added to life.
Then, fast forward a few years, all of a sudden, the idea of conscious living, nutritious meals, healthy lifestyle (think yoga, meditation and aromatherapy), deep-and-meaningful relationships, and a BABY seems to be the perfect picture.
I may be a little over-the-top with my comparisons, but to be very honest, that was really my transformation.
I can tell you what motivates or satisfies me at work now is totally different compared to 10 or 5 years ago.
Over the Christmas and New Year holiday, I had some time off and I really think deep about this topic. I have been coaching and consulting for quite a number of years and I have worked with many different types of clients and businesses.
At this stage, I know what I love to do most is to coach women who are in transition, especially women who want to change their career or start their business, or mothers with young children who want to achieve more success with their work without sacrificing their quality of life with their family and personal well-being.
I am passionate about helping them to find more success AND joy in their career or starting their business to fulfil their inner calling.
And at the same time, I like to help them to find the right work-life balance, and at times, right work-life boundaries.
It is a dream for me, and I am sure many women have the same thing. We want to have a great career AND great relationships with our partner and friends, quality time to nurture our children, good health, look good and feel good.
Not being superficial here,
This week's episode marks a significant milestone for me, as this is episode #50 of my podcast! I am so thrilled to be recording this for you.
Over the years of coaching, I found what I love to do the most is to help women to find more success and joy in their career or running their business. And at the same time, help them to find the right work-life balance so that they can also enjoy a great life outside of work with their relationships and well-being as well.
I guess that's why I love the concept of Goddess, and I wrote a book about them! When I think about the image of a goddess, I see a feminine figure who is beautiful and powerful. And that is what I want all of us to live like and be at heart. Feeling inspired and empowered.
So with my podcast, I share my mindset, productivity tips, time management strategies, as well as how to work with feminine wisdom to become more productive and creative. They will help you to save time and energy for your loved ones and for your body, mind and soul too!
Ageing gracefully is something I now start to advocate and in the coming weeks I am also going to share with you what I know and what works for me personally. I hope you will love these new topics too!
This week I want to share with you something that is not new, it's actually based on ancient wisdom, and people have been practising for hundreds of years. This is becoming more and more trendy to follow and no longer just "New Age" stuff but very much in the mainstream and recommend by other life coaches or wellness experts.
Well, you may have guessed it from the title. Yes, it is about the new moon coming up on 25th January. Actually, I love it so much that I am going to give you my reflection journal and new intentions fun sheets to help you to get the most out of this new moon. Just click on this link, and you can use them this week. (No sign up required!)
But before we dive into the reasons why this week is excellent to harness new ideas and creative energy, let me give you a bit of background and context here.
Even though I wrote a book about goddesses and archetypes, I wasn't actually knee-deep into moon cycles or the feminine wisdom that is associated with our menstrual cycle.
Many of you are probably aware of the association of feminine energy and masculine energy.
But just to give you some examples, traditionally we say:
Creating, nurturing, receiving are actions or state of being that is related to feminine energy.
Competing, asserting, giving or doing are more related to masculine energy.
There is a place for both, and that's why we need both energies to run the world.
I came across the term "Egg Wisdom" a couple months ago, and I'd love the idea to reflect on our body and mind with our natural environment. I love the notion about cyclical living, where we don't go 100% high speed all the time just because we want to achieve our goals or dreams. It makes total sense to me. We take a different type of action with a different kind of focus to varying times of the month or year or even life stage.
For instance, in most parts of the world, there are four seasons, namely: Spring, Summer, Autumn and Winter. It is just the environment that surrounds us. We live and breath in alignment with nature.
I wrote about this in my book Goddess with Many Faces, and I compared it with the women cycle of life where we naturally go through all these stages. The four life stages are Maiden, Mother, Matriarch and Wise woman. We feel drawn to different expressions and pursues in different life stage. We have different energy as we go through these changes.
Now think about it, we can also scale it back and compare it with our monthly cycle or phases of the moon. There is a time when we get inspired, ideas start to flow, and we grow the seeds of a new project or adventure. Next, we want to nurture or "brew" our thoughts and explore them further. Then,
In my interview with Fiona, we talked about how she overcame her ups and downs in finding her own path to success and bliss. I have attended one of Fiona's Women Success Circle events and I know first hand how she loves to empower and uplift others through her work.
Fiona Craig is an author, Life Balance Coach based in Sydney with a background in NLP, Meta Life Coaching and Gestalt Psychotherapy. She runs a wonderful Women Success Circle as well as her coaching and mentoring programs.
In our interview you would hear how the glamours young model eventually become the woman who coaches and mentors others to live a more balanced and fulfilled life!
Fiona's journey is a total Heroine Journey, with all the fascinating encounters as well as some time in the belly of the whale. She has a lot to share in how to peruse our dreams, understand our limiting beliefs and start a new chapter in life.
She is also the author of an award-winning book “Stuck in a rut - how to rescue yourself and live your truth”. If you are feeling uncertain how to move forward on your path or need a dose of inspiration and encouragement, you got to check out this episode!
Episode Notes:
The journey of a young woman working in modelling, advertising, jewellery design and eventually becoming a coach and Gestalt Psychotherapist
How to live with courage and learn how to love yourself
Some people can heal, and some don't, why is that?
Healing from chronic fatigue and mindset shift
Run your own race, make peace with who and where you are
Do not let people tell you what you can and cannot do!
Writing her book, find your own rhythm, what works for you and focus on progress.
All the big wins stem from this idea: "When you got nothing to lose, why don't you give it go!"
If you would like to get in touch with Fiona Craig, please go to www.LifeBalanceCoach.com.au
https://youtu.be/tIi6Zt36fUg
Transcript
Sze Wing: Hi everyone. Wow. I'm really happy to do this interview today with my dear friend and colleague, Fiona Craig. So little short introduction, Fiona, you're an author, a life balance coach and you're based in Sydney and I know you have a background in NLP, Meta-Life Coaching, Gestalt Psychotherapy. You also run your own coaching and mentoring programs as well as something I love, the Women Success Circle. So that's the introduction for Fiona and welcome, thank you so much for being here today.
Fiona: Well, thank you Sze Wing, thank you for having me today.
Sze Wing: Great. And also we have a guest appearance, Fiona's dog at the background, as you can see where he is, I don't know if he is a puppy or it's a mature-
Fiona: Yeah, he's an eight year old Caboodle.
Sze Wing: Yeah, sleeping at the background, for those who are watching our interview.
Fiona: Sleeping in the background. He thinks he's part lion, because he likes to be up on the cushion. So as much as I try and arrange the cushion to look perfectly symmetrical, he likes his side, he will go and actually push it down and go and sit on top of it like a lion, that's what he loves to do.
Sze Wing: It reminds me of my daughter, as in, first of all, she go around the house and go, I don't know why, and she does the same thing, arrange the cushion, and jump on top of the sofa, so. You cannot expect the house 100% the way, how you like it when you have hairy friends or little people.
Fiona: Yeah, that's exactly right, I'd rather have a home, and a happy home where everyone feels comfortable, as opposed to having a house and gardens home where I feel like, Oh, break that, Oh, don't touch that, so good.
Sze Wing: And it's funny because I know that we're all tending to stop both people listening, but actually I think one of the theme that will come through in today's interview is about how life unfold in a way that may be unexpected and you d...
Happy New Year! It has been nearly 2 weeks that I have been having a break from work and completed the move into our new house at 20 weeks pregnant! :-) BTW- We are having a baby boy this time!!
As I shared with you in my previous podcasts at the end of 2019 on Year-End Review and why it is so important to celebrate all the good things and look at lessons learned, now it’s time to look ahead and dream big a new year!
In this episode I talked about why this is a SUPER important time of the year to set ourselves up on the right track of creating what we want, putting support in place to avoid distraction and most of all, being VERY CLEAR about what matters to you most for this year and focus on that.
2020 is set to be a very transformative year, whether you look at it from an astrological perspective, or reflecting on what is happening with our natural environment (yes, I am particularly referring to the devastating bushfire in Australia) or political climate. This is going to be a big year, and so let’s put some time aside and put our best thoughts forward to plan for one of the most amazing years of a new decade!
At the end of the episode, I also talked about my new FREE audio program 3 Keys for more Clarity, Energy and Productivity and that can help you with creating an amazing year ahead!
Shownotes:
This is the time to Dream Big! The winning ticket is in the details (clear strategy and focus and consistent effort) How to avoid distraction and prepare for the unexpected (ground rules, good habits, support network & buddy) Less is More - Do Not Over Plan!Schedule your regular "Check-In" Be Smart With Your Time (get ONE thing done every day) Clear Intention and Elevated Emotions (the magic bullet for creation)
If you haven’t done it, make sure you get the FREE download of my new Audio Program - 3 Keys for more Clarity, Energy and Productivity.
It comes with a complimentary guidebook which a great tool for you to kick start 2020! Make sure you check out the productivity pages - my weekly planner, 12- month At-a-glance, energy tracker, weekly check-in worksheets are my go-to resources these days. They are really useful for keeping me on track and in-sync! You can access them all for free here.
Enjoy!
Once you’ve listened in to this episode, I’d love to hear from you. If you have a magic wand right now, what would you like to do?
You can post a comment on my blog page, PM me on my FB page @CoachSzeWing or Instagram or email me at info@SzeWingVetault.com
Show notes and links can be found on https://szewingvetault.com/blogs
Subscribe & Review in iTunes
Are you subscribed to my podcast? If you’re not, I love to encourage you to do that. I don’t want you to miss an episode. Also, I offer occasional gifts and early-bird offer of my programs first on my podcast! Click here to subscribe in iTunes!
Now if you are extra nice and kind, I would be really grateful if you left me a review over on iTunes too. Those reviews help other people find my podcast and I’d love reading them! Just click here to review, select “Ratings and Review” and Write a Review”. That’s it! Thank You!!
This week I am releasing my podcast a day early as tomorrow is Christmas!! Ho Ho Ho! I can’t believe this, time passes so quickly and now we are about to step into 2020!!
This is the time of the year I like to schedule some time for myself, thinking about this year and setting new intentions for next year. If you have been following my podcast, you would have seen my Year-End Review and Strategic Plan episode that outlines what I do and how I do it every year. I find this task not only super productive, but it gives me a ton of clarity and excitement in setting myself up for success next year. If you've missed that episode, no worries, you can find it here.
Here are 5 more tips I want to leave with you before the end of the year, as I know that these tips have helped me in finishing the year with a big smile and pumped for next year.
Count Your Blessings
The saying goes, when you count your blessings, your blessings count. Also, I think Oprah said it that the more you are grateful, there are more to be grateful for. Just like anyone, we all have the ups and downs throughout the year. Sometimes we get into the habit of beating ourselves up for the mistakes or missed opportunities and forget to congratulate our wins or appreciate good things that happened out of the blue. I invite you to think about all the happy moments that you treasured this year, whether it was a good get-together with your friends or just watching you baby laugh the other day. Choose your thoughts wisely and embrace gratitude and pleasure this time of the year.
Digital Detox
After all the festive meals, we hear people say they need to detox and eat clean for January. That is certainly a fine idea but I also like to invite you to spend less time on social media and your mobile devices. Take the time to connect with people and stay offline as much as possible. You will be amazed by how you feel after a couple of days. It’s like you are no longer distracted and less “busy” for nothing.
Quiet Time For YOU
Following the digital detox, I would also like to recommend some total quiet time, meaning schedule nothing but spend some time alone. I know it may be hard given you will likely to have friends and family around during the holidays, but try to let people know you just need a couple of hours to do “something”, and that “something” is in fact, “nothing” (but you don’t have to tell them that :-). I suggest, no reading, learning, socializing. Less intellectual the better. Just simply BE. Maybe go for a walk or take a long bath. I want you to allow some quiet time to sink in so that you can hear what your body, mind and spirit try to tell you. We are far too often over-scheduled with activities that don’t leave enough room and silence to let us hear our deepest inner thoughts. This is the best time of the year to do this, so go for it!
Plan Ahead
I do subscribe to the saying that if you fail to plan, you are plan to fail. I am not rigid or over-detailed by all means, I love being spontaneous and free-flowing, but there are certain things I do believe we need structure, strategic and roadmap. Whatever new project, intentions or goals you have in mind, try to set aside some time to plan for it and start thinking what you need to do, no matter how small to make it moving forward. You will feel 10 times better after you take 1 step!
Choose Kindness
This is the time of the year you may spend a lot of time with your family which may bring up opportunities to allow your rough edges to rub against theirs. In many ways, these are valuable lessons but while we are in the midst of a heated debate or stressful meal preparation, it doesn’t feel that way. When that happens, I remind myself that being kind is always more important than being right. People may have a very different opinion, perspective, background stories and you don’t always know what is their current circumstances, so being kind is my rule of thumb.
In my last week’s solo podcast about being a busy working mum, I touched on how to find joy, purpose and work-life balance. This week I have an interview with a career and life coach, Kelly MacLellan who is passionate about helping people to find fulfilment at work and in their personal life.
Kelly is based in Canada and she offers her coaching/mentoring programs online as well. Her book "Follow Your Heart" offers detailed self-empowerment activities, exercises and challenge you to chase your dreams and discover your life purpose.
In our time together, we talked about her “becoming” story and how she eventually work as a coach and mentor. If you want to learn more about what is the number 1 reason pulling people back not to go for their dreams, why this can be changed and how our life will unfold after, then you got to listen to our podcast! She is a wonderful guest on my show, I just love our conversations!
You can listen to my podcast or watch the video below. There is also a full-length transcript if you prefer to read! :-)
If you want to connect with Kelly and find out more about her new mentoring program, please go to www.embraceyourlife.ca
https://youtu.be/ywSr-8ZeDdg
Once you’ve listened in to this episode, I’d love to hear from you.
You can post a comment on my blog page, DM me on my FB page @CoachSzeWing or Instagram or email me at info@SzeWingVetault.comShow notes and links can be found on https://szewingvetault.com/blogs
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Now if you are extra nice and kind, I would be really grateful if you left me a review over on iTunes too. Those reviews help other people find my podcast and I’d love reading them! Just click here to review, select “Ratings and Review” and Write a Review”. That’s it! Thank You!!
My Christmas Present for YOU!
Don’t forget you can now get access to my new FREE Audio Program: 3 Keys for More Clarity, Energy and Productivity.
I launched this for busy career mums or mompreneurs like you who are trying to have it all and sometimes it is a struggle, and it is hard not to get stressed out or simply exhausted.
In this program, I am going to share with you my best-kept secrets in creating the life I live right now and how to get more done with less stress, less time but more joy!
This audio program is about 50 minutes in length and you can listen in commuting to work or while washing the dishes.
But wait, there is also a bonus! I have prepared a complimentary guide book for you to apply what you’ve learned too! Click here to get your download. Enjoy!
Transcript
Sze Wing: Hi everyone. I'm really happy to be here interviewing my thirst Canadian guest. Today I'm talking to Kelly MacLellan and she's a personal life and career coach and she's based in Canada and I haven't been to Canada but I'm so excited because I would love to go. And so I'm really happy to talk to you today. And she's passionate about helping people to find fulfilment in work and in life, and her book, Follow Your Heart offers really detailed activities, exercise and challenge you to chase your dreams and discover your life purpose.
Sze Wing: So I can tell we're kind of doing the same thing at different places and maybe slightly different tools and vocab. But I'm also a coach so I'm really excited to talk to another coach, based in Canada, so welcome Kelly.
Kelly: Oh, thank you so much for having me.
Sze Wing: Great. So yeah, so I would love to, I often like to start with this type of question because everybody has the journey, especially when you become a coach, often it's because you have done something in your life,
Recently I had a weekend away with a few mums who have young children. We talked about all kind of things related to family life and career, and at one point, the topic of returning to full-time work vs. part-time work after maternity leave came up. All of them enjoy to have some days at home with their children and work part-time so that they can keep engaged with their own professions, but just not at full-time.
Given the costs of childcare services in Australia, for many of us, it may not make a big difference whether you work full-time and place your child in a childcare centre or just part-time, especially if you have more than 1 child. I also know mums who prefer to stay at home full-time in the first few years so that they can spend most of the time with them as once they attend school, they won’t have that option again. It then daunted on me that I’ve never felt the desire to stay at home, even part-time, and I don’t know if it was because of my upbringing or personality.
Knowing how our minds work, of course, the next thing I started to think is that I am not a good mother, perhaps I lack maternal instinct, or maybe I am too selfish and yep, that aliening word, “different”. Doubts set in, am I doing my best for my child? Is it for the better or worse for my family? Now with the second baby coming along, do I need to re-evaluate who am I and what I do with my life?
Thank God I remember what to do when my head starts to spin and talks like this.
I take a pause and sink in.
I thought about the years I was growing up in Hong Kong and China.
Together with my parents, we migrated to Hong Kong when I was only two. It was a difficult time and they worked very long hours in order to establish their new life. I was cared for by my grandma and other family members most of the time throughout my early childhood.
At one point, it was just too challenging and my parents had to bring me back to China. I vividly remember one day when I was about 3 or 4 years old, my mother came back for a visit, as she walked up the stairs, I greeted her with a big smile (as I did to every visitor) and said: “Hi auntie, how are you?”. But then I immediately realized that was actually my mother, so I changed “Sorry, hi Mummy...”. I guess my mum must have felt really awful at that moment because not long after that, they moved me back to Hong Kong permanently.
Despite my parents were not always around, I’ve always felt loved. Also, I completely understand they did the best they can. I never felt lonely or neglected but rather I saw them as brave and determined people who wanted to make a better living for me. Perhaps that was the reason I never felt guilty of not wanting to stay at home.
That was my background and perspective, and that is me. And that is OK. I need to be OK with my decision and the way I write my own story.
Everyone has their own different story.
And I got reminded what I always say to myself and others. You Do You.
I know I am at my best when I get to do my work and feeling fulfilled at the end of the day. I can then 100% immersed with playing and caring for my daughter, be really present with her, as my creative and intellectual well has been filled that day and I feel whole and energized.
I also do my best work when I have spent a really fun weekend with my family with loads of quality time together.
The art is having a good balance where I know when to stop work and don’t carry the “left-over” worries or stress from work when I spend my time with my family.
To maintain that balance is art, and it takes practice but once I know what it is to make me happy and whole, I know what to do and know it when my balance is off.
So if you have been feeling guilty one way or another, think again. We must be honest and own who we are if we want to be authentic and be our best self to model and inspire others, especially for our children.
In this interview, I talk to my dear friend Cate Peterson, one of the most respected leaders in the Yoga community in Australia. She has been a Japanese Yoga Teacher since 1994, teaching workshops and conferences in various yoga teaching disciplines. For more than three decades, she has been a yoga teacher, meditator, mentor and activist. She uses yoga as a tool to help people to become more mindful and managing their mental and physical well-being.
From providing classes to organizations and individuals, she then developed the YogaPass which was very successful in spreading yoga in Australia, and eventually, it has evolved to YogaHive. It fuels GetOffYourAsana; an organization that builds a bridge between yogis and activists to bring about a better world and focuses on greening the scene through another platform called LoveEarth.
Cate also ran the inaugural World Day of Yoga in 2015 at Bondi Beach and in 2016 at both Bondi and Sydney Opera House.
I see that in a way, she is using Yoga as a tool to connect people, perhaps first more individually, for instance, to become more mindful with their body and emotional wellbeing, but then it becomes a way to connect with like-minded people collectively. This also ultimately unite people to look after our environment more holistically.
She is such an inspiration and her journey as an activist advocating positive change is really worth learning from. In our conversation, we spoke about what has been changed since she started her heroine journey nearly 30 years ago and what continues to drive her and lead her to keep moving forward.
You connect with Cate via her various organizations with the links above, or you can also connect with Cate via Facebook https://www.facebook.com/CatePetersonYoga
You can listen to our interview via my podcast player above or iTunes or any major podcast catchers. You can also watch the video below:
https://youtu.be/GSRLrtWhQIQ
Transcript:
Sze Wing: Hi. Welcome to this week's interview, and today I've got Cate Peterson with me. And as I was just chatting with Cate a minute ago that it's impossible to do a short introduction, but I will try because Cate has been doing so much amazing work in the last three decades. And also, your work is evolving so much, so I will try my best to do a very short run down, then we're going to talk through what you're doing and the message and the things that you're advocating and really care about. Sounds good?
Cate: That sounds great. I think it's just that I'm so old, that's why I've done so much.
Sze Wing: No. Not at all. I'm sure people could have spent three decades not having all this experience, and evolved to the way that you have let your work because none of that seems easy. Anyway, let's all hold our horses. Let me start with a very short outline with what I gathered. First of all you were trained as a Japanese yoga teacher since 1994. You have been teaching workshops and conferences and various yoga teaching disciplines and so for more than three decades you have been a yoga teacher, meditator, mentor and may I add activist because I think you really championed a lot of things. So I would say you're such an activist in what you do.
Sze Wing: And primarily I see you using yoga as a tool to help people and the way I look at it, it's very much using yoga as a tool or engine to connect people first to their body perhaps more individually to be more mindful and care about their well being but also collectively as a way to remind people to look after themselves and our environment. I see a living body around us, surrounding us, and that's also that piece of well being. And also looking after our health and well being in a more holistic way, not just individually but more collectively and also with our environment. But that's how I see how your work sort of evolved, connecting individuals in the community to the envi...
This is THE most important thing I want to do before Christmas. (Yes, before all the Christmas shopping and festivities kick in! :-)
For me, this is not just some kind of business To-Do, I do that to reflect on both my personal life and work, most importantly, I keep it pretty simple and fun!
What I have learned is that if I take an inventory of what happened this year and really look deep at some of my lowest moments, I rarely make the same mistakes again.
The more I count my blessings and appreciate the good things in my life, there are more to appreciate and to be grateful for. It feels good and keeps me grounded.
I remind myself of what really matters to my heart.
I let go of things or people that no longer align with my values and beliefs.
This year has gone by so fast if I don’t do this, I will feel the year has gone past me like a dream, and I haven’t really truly live through it. When I do my review, I savour and relive a lot of good memories.
So here is how I do this:
I craft out some time to be alone, undisturbed. No phone, no emails, no kids.
I think about the following and write the answers down in a notebook:
1.) My Top 3 Personal Highlights and 3 Business Highlights 2.) The Lowlights - where I didn’t feel I handled the situation well or simply making a mistake or being treated in a way that is not OK. More importantly, what is Message from the Mess (I got this phrase from Mel Robbins - Love It!)
3.)What is the one single habit I can try to make next year better? (e.g. wake up 30 mins earlier to work out? Take 10 mins during the afternoon to pause? Have my vitamins with my brekkie? Don’t check email before 10 am?)
Then, moving to next year:
4.) What are my strategic goals and top 3 results I want for next year?
5.)What is required for me to get there? (What I need to start doing, stop doing or learn or acquire?)
6.) What may be the catalyst for that to happen? ( Get a business partner? Sign up to a gym? Subscribe to an organic produce delivery service? Get a virtual assistant? Focus on my 80/20 rule?)
7.) I then look at my 12 months yearly planner, and for each quarter, what is my main Personal and Business Focus? I limited to a maximum of 3 things in each quarter and sometimes, 1 is more than enough. (e.g. I am having my second baby in late May, and so for Q2 April May June, my sole focus is nurturing myself and the newborn. And that is PLENTY to focus on!)
8.) Once I have done the BIG ROCKS for each quarter, I will add several key components under each. Just to have a rough idea of how big is each of these projects. However, I am not doing my detail breakdown just yet, I just want to get a big picture at this point.
And that’s kind of IT! :-)
There are 2 extra things I am adding to this practice.
Once I have done my review and planning, I am going to share and discuss it with my husband, especially about some of the personal goals and plans for next year. See, we parent our kids together and we are a team, I think it is so important to communicate our goals and concerns in advance and see what we solutions or preparation we can come up beforehand.
I am talking to a handful of people who know me and my business well and I want to brainstorm with them about some of the products/services and events that I am thinking to create for next year. Also, I want to hear their opinion and advice. They will likely to stop me from committing to too much!
By doing this simple and yet holistic review, I feel so much lighter about the year before and excited about the new year to come. I know it is part of the process that can help me to grow. I feel I start getting ready to prepare for a great year to come.
You can take what I do and customize your own end of year review and planning for next year.
While you are planning for next year, I think it will be really awesome to share with you a new audio program that I...
Robyn has been empowering women and athletes for over 40 years! She is the founder of ‘Women Weightlifting Academy’ and she has won numerous titles including Teenage bodybuilder of St. Louis, Ms Missouri Overall Champion, Tri-State Regional bodybuilder champion, Top 10 bodybuilder in the country and more. She is a weight loss coach who helped individuals to lose 10-400 pounds in her career.
Back in 1994, she got hit by a bus and life has changed dramatically. During recovery, she developed a nutrition and exercise system that consists of low, medium and high energy days and it has been instrumental in helping her clients to lose weight and get fit.
In our conversation, we talked about what is the hardest part of all these weight-loss journeys or all her championships and cross country trips. She also told us the key principle to have effective weight loss, is to have an effective body to work.
The following are the Top 4 tips she shared in our interview:
Know how to work with who you are, your body, like a detective It takes 72 hours to store excess calories to turn into fat, so within that 72 hours, you can work out or change the way you eat to avoid weight gain.Our body like stability, so if we rotate the low, medium and high energy days, it will boost our metabolism.Instead of counting calories or cutting carbs, we should focus on having a clean eating lifestyle and avoid highly processed food.
You can listen to our interview with the podcast links above or watch our YouTube video below:
https://youtu.be/ENj3Bs-4LYE
If you would like to connect with Robyne, you can do so online:
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/robyne.arrow
http://www.robynearrow.com/
womenweightliftingacademy.com
Transcript:
Sze Wing: Hi everyone. Today we got Robyne Arrow joining us. So first of all, a little introduction about Robyne and she has an incredible background. She's the founder of Woman Weightlifting Academy, and she's been involved with the health and fitness industry for over 40 years. which is a long time, and wow I'm so excited to talk to you today. And she was a nutritionist and fitness trainer for elite and models, so clearly she has worked with celebrities, athletics, professional people. And she's a trainer for bodybuilders and fitness competitors.
Sze Wing: And she's a weight loss coach who has helped individuals to lose between 10 to 400 pounds in her career. So that sounds crazy. And I usually have very short introductions, but with you I've got some of the incredible things that I read about you. So first of all, she was a teenage bodybuilder at St. Louis and she's Missouri overall champion, which I assume all this was happening when you were really young. And she has done Tri-State Original Bodybuilder as champion. Top 10 bodybuilder in the country, Miss Fitness Champion, lots of titles. And she rollerbladed across the United States, she ran across the United States, and she cycled across the United States while working with community leaders. So crazy, amazing background. So welcome to my show Robin.
Robyne: Thank you for having me, Sze. Thank you.
Sze Wing: So first of all, I'm super curious. I'm just reading your bio, and just checking what you have done, it seems to me you start feeling interested in fitness, bodybuilding at a very young age. So how did it all happen? Or did you accidentally stumble across it, or at a very young age you already said this is what I want to do with my life?
Robyne: Well when I started, I was pretty young, I actually started when I was six years old. That was the first time I lifted a dumbbell. And the reason being was because I wanted to try ... it seemed like there was a lot of people in my immediate environment hurting each other, and as a little kid it was like how could this be? How could this be? And I was like I have to help.
For some reasons, the topic of “Getting Visible” has been popping up left right and centre with my friends, clients and colleagues last week.
It daunts on me that the common issue here is that women tend to have a disadvantage in getting visible in our nature. It has been socialized and conditioned into our psyche that we need to take care of others first and so getting visible never seems to be our first instinct.
However, it definitely affects our chances to get a promotion or pay rise at work. This is not because women are being discriminated necessarily, but if our work isn’t visible, and at the same time we are not proactive in asking for more, our boss doesn’t know our worth and what much we have been doing in the shadow.
If you are running your own business, getting your product and services visible means strong marketing online and/or offline. So many women I know love to tirelessly improve their product or services, and they will keep learning and perfecting their craft and skills. But when it comes to marketing and sales, they are not as nearly as excited, if at all.
Now, when it comes to our home front, how many of us feeling our workday doesn’t actually end when we leave our office? When we get home, we need to make dinner, tidy up the mess and wash dishes. If you have children, then we add picking up the kids, bath them, feed them, prep the next day lunch/school and eventually put them to bed.
What I’ve noticed is that many of us tend to “suffer in silence” as in, we try to do it all. We want to manage things our way and if things get tough, we just work harder or endure.
Although what I’ve outlined are 3 separate and different scenarios where we get stuck, there are common “remedies” that can be helpful in all three scenarios.
We need to speak up and show up
No one can read our mind, and in a busy world like this, our boss or customers don’t know what we have done and what we can offer unless we tell them and show them. Nothing needs to be a hard-sell, but we must communicate what we are working on, our progress and how can we be more helpful to our managers. Only then, they are aware of our responsibilities and accomplishments.
As for our business, we also have the responsibility to communicate with our customers how we can best help them to solve their problems. And that’s the essence of authentic marketing. It’s not about how to try to make money from people but how to best serve them with our product and services.
Ask for help
This often requires a change of mindset, where asking for help is not a sign of weakness but courage. Sometimes we can’t do certain things on our own, and the end result will be actually better if we have creative ideas or physical input from others. The old saying used to be “It takes a village to raise a child”, and in a way, it is better for the child to grow up in a close-knit community than just a nuclear family.
Not only we should ask for help, but we should ask as early as possible. People generally like to help and if we can just let people know in advance what we need, it is much easier for people to help us too. This applies to ask your spouse to take over dinner or washing up duties when you have a work deadline. If you are looking for a new job, invite your friends to help you to brainstorm ways to improve your C.V. or suggestion for new roles. If you are a business owner, you may want to call in other business owners or friends who know your industry and bounce new marketing ideas.
[click_to_tweet tweet="We simply need to open up to those we trust and let them in. " quote="We simply need to open up to those we trust and let them in. " theme="style1"]
Your Presence
Do you notice how some people walk into the room and people look up and pay attention? I am not trying to ask you do wear crazy clothes or talk in a way that will raise eyebrows, but I know there is a subtle difference when someone is confident ...
I am totally thrilled to share with you my interview with Sophie Le Brozec this week. Sophie is a Lifestyle Entrepreneur, author, blogger, mentor, mum and very importantly, an eternal optimist. She is passionate about helping others to get their best, happiest and most fulfilled life. Sophie is born British but she lived in several different countries and married a Frenchman (just like me!). She is currently based in Mauritius and working with women from all walks of life all over the world.
In this interview, Sophie and I talk a lot about “Why" and “When” we need to get a new perspective and create a new chapter in life.
Women in our generation often struggle with very similar things and here are some of the questions she gets from her clients all the time: “Is there all there is? Will life get better than it is?”, “How do I get the career or relationship I want?” or “How can I get more balance in my life?”. When we take a pause and look inward, we realize there are things that we may want to change, or we need to start making different decisions if we want different outcomes. You may need to “reboot” your life, give it new energy and clarity in order to do that.
If you would like to connect with Sophie, you can go to her website or find her on social media and linked-in by looking up Sophie Le Brozec:https://www.sophielebrozec.com/
I hope you will enjoy this interview by listening to my podcast or watch the YouTube video or you can read the transcript below if you prefer that too.
https://youtu.be/tvrFKdFNoUQ
If you are struggling with similar questions or insights, please share with us in the comments below. I love reading them!
Transcript
Sze Wing: Hi everyone. I'm really happy today to introduce you to Sophie Le Brozec. So a short introduction. Sophie is a lifestyle entrepreneur, Psychology's magazine ambassador, author, blogger, teacher, mentor, mom, and eternal optimist. So actually I'm going to ask her a little bit about eternal optimists. I think I'm a stubborn optimist, and I think my husband call himself a patient optimist.
Sze Wing: Anyway, Sophie is passionate about helping others to get the best, happiest, and most fulfilled life together. So I'm really thrilled to interview today. So welcome to my show, Sophie.
Sophie: Thank you so much. I'm so excited to be here.
Sze Wing: Great. So now, before we dive in a little bit more about your work. What I'm really curious about is that I know you're British, and you are not living in Britain. And in a way we're quite similar, because we both married a French person. And I'm living in Australia with my Frenchman. And you're at Mauritius?
Sophie: Yes.
Sze Wing: Yes, and you have lived in various countries. And I know for myself how it influenced me, but I want to hear how does it influence you to become a lifestyle entrepreneur? And if people don't quite know the term, then what does it mean to be a lifestyle entrepreneur?
Sophie: Okay. So yeah, it really confuses people because I have a French name, that I am actually British and I married a French man. So I actually lived in the south of France for 12 years, which is where I met my husband and had my first daughter. Then we were in London for five years. And then nearly four years ago we moved to Mauritius, which for those who don't know is an island, tropical island, in the Indian Ocean, just to the east of Madagascar in Africa.
Sophie: And so living in these different places with these different cultures and religions and languages and everything has really sort of sculpted how I see life. Because it's really interesting because things are very different. But also things are very much the same. So it's very interesting. So I work with women, and the women I see across all walks of life. So I have women who I work with who are Muslim, Hindu,
Recently I have been going through a big change within my body, which leaves me with very limited energy and it also triggers an avalanche of emotions. I feel so not-in control, physically, emotionally and mentally. If you are like me, who have been pretty healthy most of the time, we are somehow taking things for granted. What I expect myself to be able to accomplish in a day or how would I feel throughout the day will need to adapt to my new circumstances.
Change rarely comes easy, yet it can be eye-opening.
In my book Goddess with Many Faces, I talked about Women’s Cycle of Life, where we will inevitably go through different stages in life. We all go through changes physically, emotionally and spiritually as time goes by.
I compared the stages of Maiden, Mother, Matriarch and Wise Woman to the four seasons, where we experience different wonders, challenges and growth in each of the seasons.
For the last few years, I have been coaching women how to navigate and lean into their own changes, consider them as Soul Adventure, and take the call to experience their own transformation in the most positive way.
Now, as I am facing my own new change and the lack of energy, I discovered a few more really helpful elements to share with you.
You may be at a very different stage or season in life than me. Perhaps your challenge isn’t created by a physical change but rather an emotional or external one. No matter how it happened, I believe what I am going to share with you will bring you more clarity, energy and impact with what you do.
Focus on Impact not Items
Since I cannot work harder I have to find ways to work smarter and more effective, I need to focus on the actual impact and results, not just merely how many tasks I can tick off on my to-do list. So, instead of a daily lengthy to-do list, I now look at my week of appointments and activities to see how am I placed throughout the week. I look at what absolutely needs to be done by me this week and cross out any nice-to-haves. From there I create a weekly to-do list.
Then, I pick 3 priorities, they can be about work or personal matter, but something I really need to focus on and hence spend most of my energy or mind-power on.
You see, I may sound really brutal in cutting things down, but at the end of the day, I know I am doing the most urgent and important things and that gives me the peace of mind as I know I didn’t fall into doing any not-urgent and/or unimportant things.
Pick the battles to win the war! ?
Moon Cycle and Your Energy
Since I have very limited energy, I was experimenting to make the best use of my energy aligning to the cycle of nature.
Right until this point, I have never paid much attention to the Moon Cycle or how it can affect our energy until now. I know the basics like moon phases or retrograde but I haven’t put much thoughts or practice to fully “capitalize” this Feminine Wisdom. Now I’ve learned how our energy shift and productivity changes, I start to plan my tasks or work project according to the Moon Cycle.
For a new moon, I will plant the seeds of new ideas or projects, set an intention and let my creativity flow. For waxing, I start to build momentum, share my initiatives, collaborate with others and basically getting my ideas out there. Then at a full moon, I launch my projects, host an event or simply step into the light of the work I created. At waning, I complete the projects and tie up loose ends. I also start to slow down and to reflect on what I have learned.
I find this “work planning” very nurturing and free, I am not chasing a linear timeline to get things done, as I am following a cycle where everything will get done in the right time and place. It is a never-ending cycle of doing and being. I find this very comforting.
Own Your Morning
The only thing I find that I have some degree of control is when I wake up in the morning before my family.
Kristy is an ex-nurse turned author, her first book "Confessions of a Professional Overthinker” is coming out in October 2019.
Her journey of writing this book is nothing short of personal experience on acceptance, courage, and healing. Her background in nursing has helped her to identify certain connections between physical or emotional problems and the life stories people tend to hold.
More often than not, the thoughts of “I am not good enough”, “I am unworthy” or “I am not lovable”, were the stories many patients have in their minds, especially those who have addiction issues.
She talked about how we unknowingly play the “old stories” in our mind based on our childhood experience and even though they are not valid or true, we are still affected by them.
We may not be able to change the past, but now we have a choice to stop repeating those stories that no longer serve us and we can decide not to let them define us any further.
Kristy said powerfully, "At the end of the day, it's a choice if you want to heal emotionally, physically, spiritually, but it's also a choice to stay in what is keeping you safe.”
I hope you will enjoy this deep and meaningful conversation about healing and self-discovery.
If you would like to connect with Kristy or check out her new book, please go to https://www.kristyriggall.com/ and her Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/confessionsofaprofessionaloverthinker/
Transcript of our interview:
Sze Wing: Hi, everyone. Today we are going to talk to my guest Kristy Rigall. She is the author of "Confessions of a Professional Overthinker", which I think is an awesome title. I know Kristy has a nursing background and now obviously more focused on her creativity. She just finished the book and I know it's in the works, it's coming out soon, which is extremely exciting because myself being an author and I remember when I was working on my first book, it was a huge project. So I guess we have a lot to share in that sense. And I'm so excited for you to have your book coming out and I just love the title and I'm really curious to talk to you today about your book because it's something that I think a lot of us do (to overthink). So welcome to my show, Kristy.
Kristy: Thank you very much. Thank you for having me. I'm excited.
Sze Wing: Yeah, so first of all, let's jump into the title of the book because when you mentioned that to me, I was like, "Wow, that's really catchy." When I was working on my book, it took me a long time actually to come up with a title, because you know, I was working with goddess archetypes, partly psychology and mythology. And I'm also very grounded in personal development and spirituality about helping people to transform their life. But I don't want to sound too witchy woo, but there is the element of myths and the wisdom from the people before. So it took me a while to actually put it together in something that captures everything and showed the essence of the book. So when I hear your title I thought, "Wow, that's super great, and I can really get what you're doing." So how did it all come together with the book and the title?
Kristy: Well, the actual title, it didn't actually come about until this year. I had a few different titles or working titles as they call them. Then, yeah, I guess this year I started to think about what is it that I actually want the book to say and what is it that is actually or has actually been going on. I guess the thing is, is that how it came about was that I was sick and tired of being sick and tired, and I was sick and tired of my mind running the show.
Kristy: I guess in about 2014 or so, my daughter was two, I started writing in a journal and I did that as a teenager, and I stopped doing it for some reason or other, but I did. But after I had her all these questions and things were coming up. Anyway,
This week’s blog is sparked by a recent conversation I had with my client about asking for a pay rise.
Lindsay (for her privacy, this is not her real name) has been running a multi-million dollar start-up as a managing director for several years. The company has been doing extremely well in the last 12 months and for all her hard work, long hours and personal scarifies, she feels it is time to ask for more and she wanted some coaching to prepare her for the conversation with her boss.
What makes this really interesting is that the conversation we had was actually not about HOW to get a pay rise.
You’ll see what I mean next.
After listing a number of very reasonable, rational and critical factors, she told me how much she was planning to ask for. But then I asked her, how much you actually think you are worth for this company in the current market?
Without a pause, she named a figure that is 20K more than what she just told me.
I asked her why she didn’t say that higher figure first?
Then, she took a pause.
She told she is very confident to get that lower figure, but it may be a bit out of her character to ask for the higher one.
I said, “You mean asking for what you really think you are worth?"
I guess that question or in fact, a statement that really hit home.
I think many of us can relate to this. Even though if you are confident with your work, talent, relationships, track record and everything else, the ASKING part is not as easy or directly proportional to how good you think you are in your job.
I then asked her to imagine the following scenario - please forgive me if you don’t like this kind of example because it feels political incorrect or cliche - but both my client and I TOTALLY got what we are really talking about.
I find asking for a pay rise is an act that requires more of masculine energy and so the scenario will be set as such. So here it goes:
Prom Night is coming up. You want to ask someone out as a date.
There are 2 girls you have in mind.
Mary: a nice and friendly girl that you get along well, and she seems to like you A LOT. You feel there is a 99% chance that she will say YES if you just ask her.
Kate: She is just simply an amazing girl at school, you get along well too, but you feel she may be slightly out of your league, so to speak, but you really like her and you two just “click” somehow. You are not sure about your chances partly because you REALLY want to ask her.
At that point, Lindsay laughed at my silly example. Knowing her, I know she would say, of course, I will ask “Kate”.
I know it is a silly example but it got us over that hurdle when we are overly self-conscious about money and self-worth. You can’t put a number on how much you like a person, you can only judge that with your heart.
[click_to_tweet tweet="It is not necessarily the rejection we fear, but we simply are not used to be brave and to jump off that mental edge. " quote="It is not necessarily the rejection we fear, but we simply are not used to be brave and to jump off that mental edge. " theme=""]
If you settle for a “safe” option, you will never know how far you can go.
So here are my top 3 tips for Asking For More in life:
Trust Your Heart
Start with a really honest conversation with your heart, not a very clever calculation with your head. Use your intuition and listen to what your heart asks you to do. Then, take action to move forward, step back or just pause. Your heart will know the when, how and even how much! Stay some quiet time to meditate, pray or go for a long nature walk alone. Figure out what is that your heart calls you to do, and then formulate the steps with your mind after.
Asking from a place of love, not fear.
Let’s say you want to get married because you feel drawn to make that scared commitment and want to honour and celebrate the person you love versus you find everyone else around you ...
In this week’s interview, I talked to the founder of Highly Sensitive Healing, author and professional dancer/teacher Jennifer Arnspiger. Clearly, she is a multi-passionate and talented being. Jennifer's healing journey is an empowering lesson for many of us who are in the midst of the dark night of our soul or in recovery from trauma.
Jennifer shared with us how she discovered that she is a highly sensitive person, what are the common characteristics, potentials and some really good self-care tips too. We also talked a lot about why creativity and movement are so important for highly sensitive people.
This is a delightful interview, and I’d love for you to listen to this podcast. So, instead of including a summary here like I normally do, I am only going to include the show notes/highlights below but I'd add a full-length transcript at the end of this blog. (Just in case you prefer reading!)
You can also watch the video version if prefer that!
Shownotes/Highlights:
Falling in love with ballroom dancing Writing as a way to channel our intellectual creativity Pretty Piece of Flesh: three short stories about how we collect experiences and they affect our bodies, and then how our body feels affects our experiences.The journey of self-healing and helping other highly sensitive peopleHighly sensitive people are not just people who are emotionally reactive or overdramatic. It is actually someone who is born with a hypersensitive nervous systemCommon experience/tendency: trauma, co-dependency and toxic relationshipsHonouring our sensitivityThere is something in common between the highly sensitive and creative peopleCorrelation between autoimmunity or mystery illnesses and being extremely sensitive and having a traumaHealing modality: Ondamed and working with Desire MapSupporting people who have been feeling the pain emotionally or physically and how to start over with new feelings and experiencesSelf-care tips for highly sensitive people (foods to avoid, other resources that are helpful)
If you would like to get int touch with Jennifer, you can find her on Facebook and Instagram @HighlySensitiveHealing and her website: https://highlysensitivehealing.com/
https://youtu.be/eaN6xkUlCoY
If you enjoy this blog, please share it on social media! You will find the buttons below. You will also like to sign up for my inner circle newsletter, as I share my coaching tips, deepest thoughts and occasional free gifts there. It comes out on Wednesdays every 2 weeks! Once you sign up, you will also receive my inspirational eBook"21 Days of Inspiration” too! You can sign up and get it here FREE of charge!
Transcript:
Sze Wing: Hi, welcome Jennifer! Today you are my very special guest, who also shares a passion for dancing. I'm really looking forward to having this chat with you.
Jennifer: Hello, thank you for having me!
Sze Wing: Great! So a little short introduction. So, Jennifer, she's the founder of Highly Sensitive Healing, which I find fascinating. She's a dancer, author, and healer, and she's specialized in helping people to heal and create a sensuous living, a life that is celebrated after some trauma or difficult times. Which is something I really care about, and I think we definitely need today.
Sze Wing: So, first of all, welcome. I definitely want to start by asking you about your dancing and your creative life, because you write novels, fictional novels, but you're also a professional dancing teacher. First of all, I'd love to hear a little bit more about your dance background and how you got into writing.
Jennifer: Okay, well actually, even those two things are sort of co-joined in my life, which is why I feel compelled to try to co-join them in my business, I think. When I was about 17, I was writing for my school paper, because I was kind of born writing. So much of the awareness of things like we're deeply creativ...
One of the typical reasons why we are exhausted is because we are trying to do too much, trying to tackle everything at once.
Why?
It’s because we are so eager to get ahead, we want to make sure we are making progress. I love progress and totally believe in taking actions, but sometimes we may need to slow down in order to go fast LATER.
We must adjust to our circumstances and avoid unrealistic exception so that we don’t need to get burnout or disappointed about ourselves.
Reminder # 1:
It is always the small changes that we make consistently over a period of time that bring us the biggest change or massive result.
So stop trying to make a giant leap all the time. Sometimes it is the incremental improvements that would path the way for your long term success.
Another reason why we tend to put way too much on our plate is that we want to make sure others are happy. Ranging from pleasing others to impressing others. We need to know if we doing what we do for the right reasons.
Reminder # 2:
Other people’s opinion is just an opinion, the most important one is yours. Trust your heart.
When we are confused, it can feel overwhelming too. So how do we get really clear about our intention or our heart desire?
Reminder # 3:
Ask yourself what is the right thing for you to do right now.
When you cannot decide which action or direction to take, don’t ask yourself what is easy or what people would think is more important.
When you are running out of patience or keep asking yourself when is this going to happen or end, remember this:
Reminder # 4:
There is always a divine timing to all things.
We cannot foresee what is ahead of us or how our destiny intertwine with others. If what you want is not happening right now, it just means later is better for your and everyone else.The last reminder is something people tend to talk about A LOT but often forget to practice when things don’t go their way. It is easy to feel this way when you are winning, but a lot harder when you are in a not so great place. However, that is why this is the most important reminder of all. It is exactly what you need to get through those times.
Reminder # 5:
Make gratitude to be your attitude.
Whenever you are feeling upset, envy, worry, sad or bitter, think about what can you be grateful for. Think about all that you have and don’t have. Simply think about what can you say THANKS to. This will warm your heart and you in a position of ultimate receivership. Gratitude is very attractive energy.
These are the 5 things I need to remind myself this week, as I have been super tired and feeling completely out of it. Going back to these very simple, basic yet profound truth helped me to anchor and keep it together! Next thing you know, I am on my way up! I hope these 5 reminders will help you too.
If you enjoy this blog, please share it on social media! You will find the buttons below. You will also like to sign up for my inner circle newsletter, as I share my coaching tips, deepest thoughts and occasional free gifts there.
Once you sign up, you will also receive my inspirational eBook"21 Days of Inspiration” too! You can sign up and get it here FREE of charge!
Today I have a special interview featuring two wonderful healers, Kate Gyngell and Judi Bastinwagner to share with you. Together, they run the Soul Healing Studio and Circles of Wisdom in Sydney.
Kate is an author and speaker, and she does Ashati Healing during the healings sessions. Judi does energy/Reiki work combine with aromatherapy and sound. Another really interesting fact about Judi is that she is also a Druid in training. So you see why I was so fascinated and excited to interview them about their journey and their work.
Kate and Judi host a monthly Soul Business Circle in which I was very honoured to be invited and spoke about my work there back in August.
I love the concept of a circle, it is not just a networking event for conscious businesses, but a real opportunity for people to share their experience, wisdom and knowledge. I felt there is a lot of respect for one another, with no judgement and simply a very nurturing space to be invited in.
In the interview, I asked them about the way how they run their healing studio and what to expect in a healing session. While I was listening to Kate and Judi describing their healing sessions, I instantly felt the warm and nurturing experience they are offering. The work they do focus on bringing the client back to balance and at the same time experiencing a higher vibration/energy during the session and after.
I think to myself, we tend to turn to therapists or healers when we experience some form of unease physically or emotionally, but it is actually really important to look after our well-being when we are not having any obvious problems.
Our well-being and health are not defined by the absence of illness but the abundance of energy, vitality and positive feelings.
[click_to_tweet tweet="Our well-being and health are not defined by the absence of illness but the abundance of energy, vitality and positive feelings." quote="Our well-being and health are not defined by the absence of illness but the abundance of energy, vitality and positive feelings." theme="style1"]
Apart from doing the healing work, Kate also hosts "The Remarkableness Podcast” where she interviews people from all walks of life about their empowering stories and lessons. Their stories always remind us how remarkable and resilient that we all can be.
Then we switched gear and talked to Judi about her journey. I am fascinated by the world of wizards and I really love the way how druids align their way of living so closely with nature. I cannot help but ask her what the druid training is all about, and what is the difference between a druid and a wizard.
So that is my little preview of what is in the interview.
It has been a very enjoyable interview and I hope you will check it out! You can simply listen to our interview through the podcast player on this blog page, or go to your iTunes podcast or any major podcast catchers and subscribe to @CoachSzeWing to enjoy my shows.
If you prefer to watch instead of listening, you can also watch the interview below on YouTube.
If you would like to contact Kate or Judi, simply go to:
https://www.facebook.com/CirclesofWisdomandSoulHealing
https://theremarkablenesspodcast.com/
https://youtu.be/fCRS6UTrmcw
Show Notes:
What to expect when you have a Soul Healing session with Kate and Judi. Stone circles, Soul Circles and Wisdom Circles. Health is not an absence of illness but cultivation of wellbeing, vitality and energy.Why nurturing our body and soul is key to our wellbeing. About the Remarkable Podcast: Everyone has a story to tell. What is the training of becoming a Druid about?
Do you have a story about own journey or something you are battling with? Share with me in the comments below or e-mail me at info@szewingvetault.com.
If you enjoy this blog, please share it on your social media! You will find the buttons below. You may also like to sign up for my inner circle newsletter,
I heard myself saying to myself the other day, "You can’t go over it, you can’t go under it, you have to go through it.”
That’s right, I kinda got the idea from the book Today We’re Going on a Bear Hunt.
I wonder if the author Michael Rosen of this children’s picture book meant to impress this profound life lesson into our little one’s mind.
If you are not familiar with this awards winning book, the story is about several children who decided to go on a bear hunt.
In the first half of the book, it focuses on “going after the bear”. Each page begins with:
We're going on a bear hunt
We're going to catch a big one,
What a beautiful day!
We're not scared.
Then, when they face each obstacle, it reads:
We can’t go over it.
We can’t go under it.
Oh no! We’ve got to go through it!
The children encounter all kinds of tricky situations, from dark forest, cold river, oozy mud to snowstorms, and finally they get to a bear cave.
It is all courageous and optimistic up until this point when they actually find the bear and it runs after them. Needless to say, they got really scared and claim that they would never go for a bear hunt again.
So, no. I don’t think it meant to be an inspirational self-help personal development kind of book after all. I mean if the ultimate response after facing some real challenges in life is to hide under the blanket, we won’t get far or get much life experience, won’t we?
In order to grow, we need to develop our agency in the face of challenges. You can’t go over it, you can’t go under it, you have to go through it.
Recently I had some unexpected negative experience working with a person. It happened while I was away on holidays with my family. It put a dent on my mood the day when it happened, and I noticed how I was upset about many other little things for no reasons.
Clearly, I wasn’t over it.
I also didn’t want to put it under the carpet and pretend it didn’t happen. I want to think hard about where is my faulty part in this situation and take full responsibility about that part and then think about what can I do in the future to prevent this from happening again.
A wise woman once taught me even when you believe it is 90% the other person’s fault, you need to think hard about your 10% and own it.
I found the same principle applies to my previous failed relationships, I found gems in discovering and learning from that very 10%.
Whether it is about heartbreaks with relationship, unsuccessful work projects or health challenges. When it comes to things that really matter, we must GO THROUGH IT.
Once we made the decision and commit to doing so, the “how" will come to us.
The infinite intelligence from the universe will give us ideas, insights or inspiration to take the next step. It may be about going inward to self-reflect, or someone will come into our life to guide us through it or a book may simply drop onto our foot in a book store. Believe me, I have heard all kind of stories regarding how the greater mind of the universe communicates. We just need to be open and aware! So, tell me, are you willing to go on a hunt, perhaps not for bears but other profound treasures in life?
Are you willing to go on a soul adventure?
I talked a lot about Hero/Heroine Journey in my book “Goddess with Many Faces”, they are such soul adventures that lead us to transform our inner and outer world. If you are interested in learning about your own Goddess Archetypes and Heroine Journey, or how to navigate big changes in life, you may like to check out my book here.
Regardless, I wish you all the best on your “bear hunt” and live life to the fullest!
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Are you thriving in your life, or just surviving?
In my interview with Jennifer Jerries, we spoke about how we are all emotional beings, and we need to look at health as an integrated unit of our body, mind and soul. You can listen to this podcast with the player above or on iTunes podcasts. You can also watch the video below.
All the wealth and success mean nothing if we have no health to enjoy it all. Good health is not just about the absence of illness but it is about being well and feeling good.
Jennifer Jefferies is The Present Day Wise Woman, one of Australia’s most respected authors and speakers in the area of health and wellbeing, working closely with some of the world’s most well-known brands to restore work-life balance. She is an international speaker and author of many books, including her Aromatherapy Insight Cards.
After leaving her pharmaceutical management career and experienced a car accident, Jennifer took a complete turn and looked at her life and health in a completely new light. She became a passionate naturopath and aromatherapist. Since then, for more than 25 years, she has helped countless individuals to improve their lives.
I met Jennifer at the International Women’s Day special event hosted by Perfect Potion in March 2019 and within minutes I knew she is an inspirational and passionate teacher. Aromatherapy is a wonderful complimentary modality that can support our health, both on the physical and emotional level.
We are all unique constitutionally and we have different specific needs at different times. What we need today may be different from what we needed last year, and that’s why we need to listen to our intuition when it comes to choosing the essential oils that are right for us, right now.
There are certainly some essential oils that we like and are absolutely good for us in all seasons but we may get surprised by what we may need on a day-to-day basis. For example, Jennifer loves to use Vetiver to ground and balance herself, and it is an oil she likes to use on a daily basis, but she will choose different oils for her bath or spray or roll-on for different reasons from day-to-day.
Jennifer's Aromatherapy Insight Cards is another great tool to tap into our intuition and look at what essential oils can support us on any given day. She created these cards from combining her decades of experience in using the essential oils with her clients and kinesiology muscle testing.
We did a quick one-card reading on the spot during our interview, asking what do I need to know for my upcoming trip (at the time of recording I was due to leave in 2 days!) and what essential oil can best support my journey.
As it turned out, it was one of my favourite, the Neroli essential oil! The message was about I need to make choices and trust the flow of life. In fact, it is always a problem for me before I go on a long overseas trip, where I tend to pack too many tasks to do before AND during the trip. It can get really too overwhelming and simply not fun! This is such a good reminder for me!
No matter if you are completely new to Aromatherapy or you are already a regular user, you will find Jennifer’s approach refreshing and effective! Her Aromatherapy Insight Cards are super fun and easy to use too!
You can purchase this deck and find out more about Jennifer at her website: https://jenniferjefferies.com
Do you have a story about your self-care journey or something you are battling with? Share with me in the comments below or e-mail me at info@szewingvetault.com.
If you enjoy this blog, please share it on your social media! You will find the buttons below.
You may also like to sign up for my inner circle newsletter, as I share my coaching tips, deepest thoughts and occasional free gifts there. It comes out on Wednesdays every 2 weeks! Once you sign up, you will also receive my inspirational eBook"21 Days of Inspiration” too!
Two weeks before our epic annual trip to France and Hong Kong/China, my little one got rather sick. She had flu, chest infection and high fever, followed by an allergic reaction to her antibiotics. I didn’t have much sleep during those two weeks because of all the pre-trip work I’ve planned and her illness unplanned. Despite all the physical and emotional exhaustion (48+ hours road trip from our home in Sydney to our home in France), I felt there is tremendous strength in a mother’s heart. We rise as superwoman, pulling through all the hurdles in order to help our loved ones to get better and get through the challenges together as a family.
The whole experience reminded me of an article I’ve written some time ago but didn’t release. It is about the “Mothers of the World”. As I’ve become a mother myself, I understand what “unconditional love” really means. When you watch your child suffer, there is no remedy for the mother’s worry or fear, but we find the strength we need to care for them.
Unconditional love leads to immeasurable strength. If we harness this strength for our loved ones, and perhaps for the future generations to come, it will be a tremendously powerful force to reckon with.
As I was writing the chapter of Demeter in my book Goddess with Many Faces, I felt called to expand on this archetype based on the current social climate and observations I have among women. Demeter in Greek mythology is the Goddess of Grains. She symbolizes fertility and earthly harvest. As an archetype, she represents women who have a natural inclination to nurture, to provide and to take care of others. She is the so-called Mother Archetype.
In my research in myths and psychology, she is mostly described as the caretaker and nurturer, in which it is definitely a strong part of her character. However, as I become a mother myself, not only I sense the influence of Demeter grows on me as I experience the unconditional love I have for my daughter, I also become more responsive towards negative news in the media about other children in the world and the environment. As though my protective instinct for my child has expanded outwards into the world we live in.
Just like how a lioness protects her cubs and their natural habitat, I see other Demeter and Artemis women speaking up and taking actions as the urgency grows with what is happening today with children of the world and the environment in which we live in. Demeter women are no longer just about making a hearty meal or looking after people individually, but it is about thinking collectively and acting on a greater scale. They become the mothers of the world.
So often we see the tendency to buy into the fear of what is happening in the world. We get concerned about what is going to happen to our future generations with the rate of natural degradation, divided political views and amount of social unrest. So how do we turn on the light when the dark seems looming?
Educate and Activate
Inaction cultivates anxiety. Identifies what concerns you and affect you emotionally then learn more about the facts and situations related to your concerns. I remember reading about appeals for children in Syria and felt deeply saddened by how many of them are trapped in areas where medical aids are hard to deliver but bombing are frequent. It was part of my instinct to find out as much as I can about the situation and what can I do to help. I know every little individual effort count where so often we pause and get overwhelmed by the magnitude of the situation.
What I’ve learned is that if we only marinate our minds with what triggers us but do nothing about it, our nervous system and emotional body will react negatively eventually. The abolition of slavery or women voting rights didn’t happen because the majority of people agree to change it. it is always a small group who started to say, this is not right and something got to change.
In my interview with Dr Orlena, we talked about how to create or maintain healthy eating habits and lifestyle for the whole family including kids. Dr Orlena is a pediatric doctor turned “Healthy Life Coach” now helping busy mums to create a healthy and balanced life.
A few years ago, together with her husband and 2 children, Dr Orlena and her family moved from England to Spain. Since then, her family has expanded to 4 children.
Our conversation began with life transitions, how one thing lead to another and how her career has changed. It was really one adventure after another. Many of us experienced the same thing, it may be about a career change or relocation or simply expanding our family.
As a health life coach, many of her clients come to her because they want to lose weight, there are lots of diets and helpful activities out there that work, but at the end of the day, what Dr Orlena finds to be most useful is to have a good foundation, here are the top 3 elements:
3 Tips on Healthy Habits
Know What You Enjoy
Have a good understanding of what we like and don’t like, whether it is about food or exercises. There is no point to force ourselves to do things that we really don’t enjoy. She recommends the Mediterranean diet because many people just simply enjoy those foods. You may find another diet suits your taste and cultural upbringing better.
Find Your Smart Routine
Since being consistent is key, we should think of ways that we can create habits that support a healthy lifestyle. Dr Orlena talked about her habit of dropping her children to school and then head straight to the swimming pool every Tuesday and Thursday. This becomes a weekly routine and it is certainly a healthy habit. I found group exercises help too as we like to work out with others and get an opportunity to socialise as well.
Have Plenty of Fresh Veggies and Fruits
Simply have more fresh vegetables and fruits around at home, make them visible and easily accessible. Visit the farmers market can be a great thing to do as well as stock up some healthy produce. Whenever we go to the supermarket, it is so easy to get packaged and processed food that there are certainly not as healthy as fresh food.
Healthy Eating Habits for Children
In terms of creating a healthy lifestyle for our children, and especially for fuzzy eaters, first and for most, we need to have healthy behaviour for them to model from. Dr Orlena shared with us some great tips for doing that:
We need to eat healthy if we want our children to do the sameIf your children have sweet tooth, perhaps have rules or set up special nights for dessert or treats, but then say no on other occasions, so it is more of a treat, not a norm. Portion control is another thing, we often overestimate how much they actually need to eat. They may not like certain vegetables but happy with others, and that is ok, there is no need to force them to eat. When we reduce the amount of sugar or salt we eat, we can actually taste our food better so it is something we can learn and grow into and appreciate more and more. Plan ahead and keep things simple is another good habit to keepJust have plentiful fo fruit and vegetables around and that can never go wrong!
If you want to get in touch with Dr Orlena or learn more about healthy habits, please visit: https://www.drorlena.com
https://youtu.be/GB5IStZ8doM
Do you have a story about your self-care journey or something you are battling with? Share with me in the comments below or e-mail me at info@szewingvetault.com.
If you enjoy this blog, please share it on your social media! You will find the buttons below.
You may also like to sign up for my inner circle newsletter, as I share my coaching tips, deepest thoughts and occasional free gifts there. It comes out on Wednesdays every 2 weeks! Once you sign up, you will also receive my inspirational eBook "21 Days of Inspiration” too!
I've always love to learn about how leaders of different generations are formed and their background stories. What I have found in common in all of them is that none of these timeless leaders is remembered because of their title or social status.
Look at anyone who is widely considered an inspirational figure, for example, Dr Martin Luthur King Jr, Mohammad Gandhi or Mother Theresa. Do we even remember their official title?
We get inspired by them for what they believe and what they did about it.
Think about the Woman Suffrage Movement, pioneers such as Susan B. Anthony and Elizabeth Cady Stanton who essentially started the women’s movement in 1848, they did not live long enough to see the legal right for women to vote in 1920. Yet, they paved the way of what is to come as one of the most significant milestone in achieving women equality.
They did what they did because they felt the call to do the right thing. They believed women have the right to vote and should be treated more equally. They didn’t know for sure if they were to succeed, in fact, the odds were completely against them. But they did it anyway.
This is in alignment with what Dr Martin Luther King Jr. believed, he said, "The arc of the moral universe is long, but it bends towards justice."
Why? Because they believe with their heart, not with their head. There are no apparent reasons why they should think they would or could succeed. But that thinking didn’t deter them, not at all.
We used our mind to form strategies, create plans and execute moves. But without the heart and deep belief in something that is truly important, none of the strategy, plan or move will lead us to the long road to victory.
About 250,000 people showed up on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial in Washington D.C. to listen to Dr Martin Luther King Junior’s speech at the March for Jobs and Freedom. He began with these words “I have a dream ...”. Not “I have a plan”.
A true leader is not necessarily someone who holds a high position in a business or an organization. It is someone who can inspire others and mobilize them to follow with actions.
As Simon Sinek said, “A boss has the title, a leader has the people.”
In order to mobilize people, we must first connect with others’ heart and emotions. This is not about the use of an effective strategy. It is about thinking about who we really are.
We are emotional beings that are capable of empathy and love. When we have something truly sincere and important to communicate, people in the receiving end can feel it. Some may try to manipulate and script the right words to say, but at a deeper level, most of us can sense what is real and what is fake or what is fear masking as protectionism.
True leadership is about who you are and why you do what you do.
We all can be leaders in our lives, whether it is at work, at home, in our tribe or community. None of that matters, we must listen to what our hearts call us to do. And that’s the ultimate way to understand and fulfil our life purpose.
Leadership is a quality that emerges from your life experience, essentially through trial and error, growth and losses. It is not something you can get to wear a badge once you reach a certain level of success. Wealth and success alone cannot attain leadership, they may provide some circumstances for it to develop but ultimately it requires a deeper understanding of who you are and what you believe.
And here comes the saying “You are the captain of your ship”, as you are the leader of your life. It is all in your power to become who you want to be.
If true leadership is something you would like to develop, then make sure you have a clear sight of what you believe, rather than chasing blindly after a title or status quo.
“A genuine leader is not a searcher for consensus but a moulder of consensus.” another great quote by Dr Martin Luther King Jr.
Now,
In my delightful interview with Jan Marie, she shared with us so many great tips on how to HAVE IT ALL without feeling overwhelmed, exhausted and downright resentful. Think of the image of a super-mum, wife, daughter, friend, who has a good career or a thriving business, plus someone who is health-conscious and earth-friendly, well the list goes on.
Jan has been a licensed therapist for 18 years before become a Transformational Life Coach. She knows how it is like to be in transition first hand. We talked about how she felt she needed a change with her work, although she loved working with her patients, she wanted more freedom to share her work and to support more people.
Like me, Jan is also a mum and she has 2 little ones. We talked about how common new mums don’t talk about their struggles or past wounds, as we spend all our time trying to do everything right for our babies but often overlook the importance to take better care of our body, mind and soul.
When we are low on our priority list, our self-worth and wellbeing will be greatly affected, but we may not be aware of it until we get burnt out or literally falling ill.
3 Keys to Maintain a Good Work-Life Balance
We talked about 3 keys to maintain a good life balance, especially when we are managing many on-going projects in life:
Learn to delegate - try to let go and don’t everything yourself. If your mind saying, “Oh he/she doesn’t do it the right way” Remind yourself YOU CANNOT DO EVERYTHING BY YOURSELF!
Ask for help- it can be as simple as carpooling or get your neighbour to pick up hers and your kid, and you make dinner for both families. Or I often ask my friends to bring a dish when it comes to social gatherings so that I have more energy to focus on spending time with people and I have more energy and “appetite” to do more gatherings!
Schedule ME time - this is an important part of self-care, once again we need to replenish our energy and nourish our body and mind. It may be just a 5 minutes silence of mediation in your day or a 30 mins nature walk in the weekend. This is vital to keep us above the water and more importantly, the clarity and energy to be a BETTER PERSON.
None of these tips is hard to do, but the question is: Are you willing to do it? Or at least try?
Are you being seen or heard?
Another common challenge that a lot of “burnt-out” women face is the issue of not being seen or heard. What tends to end up happening is that we will add more projects and agree to do MORE for others so that we hope we will be seen or heard, yet, it only adds on to our to-do list and get us more overwhelmed and under-thrilled. We may even feel resentful and powerless to keep going on with this never-ending story.
If you are the most wonderful, kind and generous mum in the world, what would you do to mother yourself or take better care of you right now?
The key to breaking away from this pattern and the cycle of “Doing More but Feeling Less” is to better our communication, stop the negative internal dialogue and switch to a more positive approach. Think about how to pivot the awful situation to an awesome opportunity. Maybe it is about speaking up, or delegating or asking for help or simply to say no to things, or perhaps it's time focus more on you.
We covered so many real-life scenarios and positive spins in this interview, I hope you will enjoy this as much as I do. Don’t forget to check out Jan’s website as she has a lot of useful resources available to youYou can find Jan here at www.JanMarieTLC.com
Please subscribe to my podcast on iTunes or other podcast catchers, so you won’t miss a show!
https://youtu.be/F1V_8tIf9sc
Do you have a story about your self-care journey or something you are battling with? Share with me in the comments below or e-mail me at info@szewingvetault.com.
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As I was preparing for a talk about my book "Goddess with Many Faces" and lessons learned from my self-publishing journey, I thought it may be fun and useful to share with my audience some of the myths or false assumptions that I encountered when I started to dive into the world of self-publishing.
I love learning and when I decided to self-publish my 1st book, I spent months learning about self-publishing and did a ton of research on the latest market trends and technologies.
In this week's podcast, I can't go into every detail or much of the technical aspects in self-publishing, however, I want to talk about some of the most common false assumptions so that it may clarify a few things for you and hopefully encourage you to publish your first book!
Here is a short summary of the podcast content:
Is it TRUE or FALSE?
Myth# 1: You need a big budget to self-publish your book
The reality is, you don't.
Just like everything else, you can pick and choose where you want to spend most of your money. Not every aspect is equally important, so if you are on a budget, I suggest to spend the money on quality editing services, book cover design and print formatting (or typesetting) if you want a print version of your book. There are many aspects of self-publishing your book can be done by yourself such as uploading to different distribution and sales channels or marketing your book.
Myth # 2: Don't judge the book by the cover
Hmm ... yes, you do. Book cover design is one of the most important aspects of getting your book into people's hands.
Why?
There are a million of books out there if your cover design doesn't look professional or unable to give a sense of what your book is about, the chances are, people won't border to read your description and let alone buy or rent your book. I don't mean you need to spend a fortune on your book cover, but it must look professional and attractive.
Unless you are a designer or willing to learn by spending a ton of hours to create it yourself, its best to get someone else to do it for you. Go and check out some covers in a book store and get a feel of what you might like. There are many book cover designers or companies you can find online that do professional covers at a reasonable price. You may be better off to spend the hours to write or improve your book instead of struggling to design the cover yourself.
Myth # 3: My best friend who loves to read and has an English degree can edit for me
This is probably a bit of a give away with myth # 1.
This is super important to get your manuscript edited by a professional editor. There are different kinds of editors, some manuscripts may need a developmental editor to help you to improve your overall manuscript. Please note that fiction and non-fiction books have different needs, it is important to find an editor that is experienced and interested to work in your genre. If you don't need a developmental editor, you will still need a copy editor or line editor that help you to go through each line of your manuscript.
Different editors do different things. And so this is a longer conversation but what I want to say here is that editing is key to the quality of your book, so unless your best friend is a professional editor, probably asking your friend to do it is NOT a good idea.
Myth # 4: It is easier or better to use a publishing service provider.
This depends on your personality and interests. I definitely see the appeal of using a one-stop-shop, as you don't have to worry about most of the technical aspects of the entire publishing process. For me, I love to learn all the aspects and choose who I want to work with, so that is counterproductive for me. In terms of pricing, it depends on what package you pick if you go with a company, it may or may not be cheaper in the end.
Myth #5: You need to have a perfect manuscript before you engage with your editor
Here is the thing,
In this fun and informative interview, I talked with Doreen (aka Dorz) Brown, an Search Engine Optimization (SEO) specialist on how to be seen and get found online.
Doreen has become a specialist through her own experience of starting out and not getting the visibility she wanted for her baby product business. She then decided to take a deep dive into the world of Digital Marketing space and worked in the industry for a number of years before running her own business again, but this time it is on SEO consulting. Since then she has consulted businesses of all sizes, locally and globally.
I know many people may find SEO and the whole digital marketing space overwhelming or intimidating, it is like facing a big beast and you don’t know how to tackle it first. This is why I love Dorz’s approach, it is all about breaking it down into manageable small parts and work on them over time, not all at once.
You can listen or watch our full interview here, the following is an outline of the key elements we've discussed.
3 Top Common Mistakes that people make with their business online:
There is no digital marketing strategy or planning in place.
When that happens, your effort is scattered and you don’t get the level of visibility you want. No matter the size of your business, how long you have been in business and what product or services you are selling, you need to have a clear digital marketing strategy and proper planning in place. Dorz uses this formula for her clients as well as for her own business, which consists of 3 key components to focus on:
Onsite SEO Offsite SEO Technical SEO
Being consistent with your SEO activities
It may be your blog content or Social Media links and posts, your website needs activities and you need to be consistent with this, if you only work on this once a while, it is unreasonable to expect good results.
Don’t handover everything to your SEO specialist
It is important to understand the working mechanics and have an overview of how your business is performing regarding the SEO and other digital marketing components. If something happens to your SEO manager or the relationship with him/her, it can be very overwhelming to have everything hand back to you while you have no idea what has been done or what needs to be done going forward.
How to stand out from a crowd
Last but not least, we also talked about how to stand out in a crowd. Dorz has a video on her website that really features her personality, her journey and how she can help other businesses. It may be very different compared to most other SEO specialist videos but it is about her authenticity and who she is. “Attraction is Easy but Connection is Rare.” But when we find the right fit, both the consultant and client are happy.
So this is the bottom line: Be who you are! You got a gift and service to offer to the world, awesome! Go ahead, learn as much as you can and bring your business to life, but make sure to let your personality be your own branding to stand out from the crowd!
If you would like to get in touch with Dorz, simply go to her website: https://doreenbrown.com.au/
You can listen to our interview via the podcast above or watch our video below. Please subscribe to my podcast on iTunes or other podcast catchers, so you won’t miss a show!
https://youtu.be/hz2LLfeseCA
Do you have a question or story to tell? Share with me in the comments below or e-mail me at info@szewingvetault.com.
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I came out from meditation the other day and this thought kept lingering in my mind. “Allow the darkness to be dissolved by the light”. I thought to myself, what “darkness” my subconscious mind was trying to tell me?
Later that day it daunted on me that I have been thinking about my past, more specifically, my past mistakes. Things that I did, that I’m not proud of. Or things that I should have done, or done better.
I notice from time to time I would like to give myself a hard time, dig up the memories of the good, bad and ugly. Then, I would judge my younger self and criticize my character default. I made myself marinate in guilt, shame, doubt, anger and fear.
It feels like I am going through my annual mental muddy obstacle course, running through dirt and aches, eventually, I would make it to the finish line. Deep down I know better, I know it is my negative self-talk. I see it clearly when people come to me and doing that to themselves. But there are days I need to coach myself out of this darkness.
There are times I’ve messed up an opportunity, behaved irresponsibly or let my insecurity took over. Those are the things to learn from, our mistakes and failures are our best lessons.
There are times, however, I have to be a better parent to myself and admit this:
If I could have done better, I would.
I remember when I turned 30, I thought about all those things that I did in my 20s and wondered why I couldn’t; be more mature and act more like a 30-year-old.
Clearly, the joke was on me because I just wasn’t there, yet.
But the longer we avoid the honesty or the lessons need to be learned, we sink deeper into the past mistakes. That is when the darkness looms in.
Our past and mistakes do not define who you are NOW and most certainly they do not define who you can become.
When theoretical physicists and metaphysicists talk about "time is an illusion", I often think about this:
The only moment that is real and truly important is NOW.
NOW is the time we can change our mind on how we think, act and feel.
When we do that, our past behaviour does not predict our future outcomes.
We intercept this with new thinking and new actions.
We can not change the past but we can change what it means for us and how it can help us to grow.
When we pour gratitude, appreciation, kindness and love into our mind, we think better thoughts, which led to better actions. Even if we look at our mistakes, when we do that with love, we can see the root cause and how we can rectify them or change the trajectory of our course.
And THAT is our guiding light.
When we think and act with love, we just cannot go wrong.
Marianne Williamson who is now running for the president in the United States, her message is simple, yet deeply profound. It is time to right the wrong with love, not hate. When hate is loud, we need to make sure love is even louder.
No matter where you are, what you are facing or feeling, there is going to be a brand new day tomorrow. You can start over. It’s never too late. Remember, time is an illusion.
Allow the darkness to be dissolved in the background and look for the light ahead of you.
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2 lucky winners each month will receive a 45 mins coaching session with me! Once you enter the form, you are in, if you don’t win this month, you may still win next month! Simply fill in this very short form now to participate!
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In my interview with Claudia, we talked about how she led a recent spiritual retreat and adventure in South America. She took a group of people from Australia to Bueno Sires in Argentina and Panache in Brazil. She called that a ReTrip, it is partly a “Retreat” and party a travel adventure “Trip" to see the extraordinary beauty of South America.
Claudia is an energy healer, spiritual teacher, coffee cup reader, Reiki Master, Shamanic practitioner and so much more. You can imagine the Retreat element has a lot to do with healing and spiritual practices. I know they did a cacao ceremony and I went on asking what that is, guessing it is more than drinking a chocolate type of beverage? She explained to me about cacao, how it is used as a sacred ceremonial plant, as it helps us to "open our heart"
What I love about her work is that it is all about love.
Spiritual Healing Retreat and Adventure in South America
She said: “What you open your heart, healing will occur.” What she learned from the ReTrip is that when people join their minds and hearts and support one another, the effect of healing will just go up to the next level.
Back in 1993, she visited Brazil for the very first time and she thought to herself, one day she would take people to see this beautiful country. It was almost like a seed planted in her mind. Years gone by, she has a friend who has a travel agency, another runs a healing centre and with so many other cooperative components fall into place, her dream has now finally become a reality. More than that, she has also become a more mature woman and a seasoned healer.
I have to say, a trip likes this requires tremendous effort and I admired her to take it on with courage. She said. "If you have a dream, you can most certainly manifest it, if it is for the highest good.”
Plant a seed of your dream today
So what is your dream? Have you planted a seed yet?
I cannot help but to add, even when there are plenty of cooperative components falling into place before our eyes, we can still say, “Let me think about this or seat on it” and don’t take the necessary actions to turn our dream into reality. There are times because we are afraid we may fail, or overthink the whole situation and convinced ourselves that we need to wait.
[click_to_tweet tweet="The truth of the matter is, if we don’t get started, we will never get to accomplish our goal. If we don’t try, we would never know if it is only a dream or can it be our reality. " quote="The truth of the matter is, if we don’t get started, we will never get to accomplish our goal. If we don’t try, we would never know if it is only a dream or can it be our reality. " theme="style3"]
No matter what is that you want to heal, change, create or achieve, plant a seed today.
Do something that is in the direction of manifestation instead of procrastination. If it requires more than 30 minutes than bring it down, make it smaller. But make sure you get it started today!
If you are interested to join Claudia to see Argentina, Brazil and Uruguay in 2020, please visit her website: www.PurpleAngelHealing.com.au and get in touch with Claudia!
If you enjoy this blog, please sure it on your social media! You will find the buttons below.
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This is the Productivity Magic Part 2! A couple of weeks ago I wrote about how to get MORE done in LESS time, this week I am going to share with you my top tips on how to do LESS but achieve MORE.
Mind twisting? Not really. if you keep reading! :-)
In Productivity Magic part 1, I focused on the logistics, the "how-to"s and good habits for increasing productivity. This week I want to focus on how to keep your body & mind as one unit to stay fresh and sharp as well as get the priorities right to maximise your results.
FIGURE OUT WHAT REALLY MATTERS
I don't like this analogy because it talks about war, which I am totally against. However, it really speaks to the point.
"Pick the battles to win the war."
I know, you probably think it is a bit strange to say this here, but it's just so true to many situations for me.
My 2-year-old can be an angel SOME DAYS but she can be very challenging other times. To keep my sanity and effectively handle an unreasonable toddler, I've learned to accept that she will ONLY agree to a couple of things we ask of her in the same day. So we have to pick the important ones, like "don't jump from the table" over "don't put your rings into mummy's teapot".
Same goes with work or business, you simply CANNOT do or fit everything in, you need to prioritise. I am of course actually talking about the Pareto Principle, the 80/20 rule. For example, you tend to get 80% of your income from 20% of your best-selling products, or 80% of your headache comes from 20% of your most challenging customers. I think you get the picture.
Figure out what really matters to your business or health or relationship or finances, or whichever area you need to improve on, then divert 80% of all your effort to accomplish the most important activities.
Tackle the "MUST HAVE", not the "NICE TO HAVE"
GIVE YOURSELF SOME BREAKS
It is obvious that our concentration doesn't last, and if you really need to focus and put your mind to work, you need to take breaks. Different studies may suggest a different time for you to pulse and take a mental break. One popular study says 25 minutes, others suggest 52 or 90 minutes and some more varieties in between. You need to try and find out what works for you best.
For me, I set a timer for 45 minutes when I work on something that requires a strong mental focus. Then, I will get up to take a short break. Pace around the room, make a cup of tea or fill up my water bottle. If you have been working for more than a couple of hours, you may need a longer mental and physical break.
Many experienced creative writers reported that they can do on average about 4-5 hours of solid writing a day, but that's about all they can do creatively and effectively in a day. They can still do some work, but probably tasks that don’t require the same mental capacity. I tend to do those tasks that require my highest concentration and creativity first in the morning, then I will move on to the more administrative or less demanding tasks later in the day.
GET MOVING
This is probably one of the most important habits of productivity. When you exercise, you are also increasing the blood flow to the brain, which can help to sharpen your alertness. Sitting all day and being stagnate is not only bad for your health, it literally stops your energy or ideas from flowing!
If you can workout daily, fantastic! Prefer to go for a walk in the morning or afternoon? Great. Only have time to get up from your desk and walk around the house? Good, I'd take that! It's better than nothing! Get moving, no matter how little time you have. You got to start!
HYDRATION
Since almost 73% of our brain is water, it is not a surprise that dehydration will affect our cognitive performance. When we are dehydrated, we also feel physically tired too. A study from the University of East London found hydration can increase our productivity by 14%.
Our self-worth is reflected in how we treat ourselves. Do we practice self-love and self-care? Or are we often shadowed by our negative self-talk, something along the lines of “You are not _____ enough”? We may fill in the blank with “smart”, “successful”, “slim”, “strong”, or simply "Just Not Good Enough”.
The pursuit of perfection is epidemic. It is not surprising though, as we browse on our social media, we see tons of images of perfect body, wealth, beauty and success. No wonder why so many people suffer different degrees of negative self-image and overlook our body and mind connection.
For women to feel good and truly well, glowing from inside and out, with a happy smile and soaring spirit, we need a holistic approach. We need to know what really matters to our heart and soul and we need to nourish our body and mind.
This week I got to speak with Niomi Lindfors, founder of Stella Wellness, who totally walk her talk in a holistic approach on well-being. She has two degrees in psychology and she uses Cognitive Behavioral Therapy in her practice. Now, here is what I meant by "walk her talk”, she is also a yoga teacher and massage therapist helping her clients to improve their wellness.
Naomi is originally from London but now lives in a small town in Sweden. She has 4 children and the 5th one is on the way. (At the time of our interview she was about 7 months pregnant!)
Since at a young age, she has been practising meditation and yoga, and they are great tools to reduce anxiety or stress.
With psychology, it is certainly more focused in the mind and intellectual matters but from her personal experience, it is so important to integrate body, mind and soul together, and that is why she created Stella Wellness, for women to feel good and be truly well in a holistic way.
After she had her first baby, she and her family moved from the busy metropolitan city of London to a quiet little town in Sweden. They wanted a calmer environment for better work-life balance and to bring up the family. But she felt a sense of anxiety that she never had before, perhaps it was the uprooting and moving to a completely different culture, with a new language to learn, as well as a young baby to care for.
That was the time that she realized yoga, meditation and massage became ever so useful again, and that was the reason behind her finding StellaWellness to help other women.
So often we put our family, work and everything else first, but forget about taking good care for ourselves. In this modern world, we can have both career and family, but more often than not, as women, we feel we need to sacrifice our self-care and time to do the things that fill our energy tank, inspiration, creativity or simply a pleasure.
This is perhaps something hard for someone to admit, let alone change. We may always try to postpone looking after ourselves or putting other things or other people first. But without a healthy and nurtured body, mind and spirit, we won’t be as effective, productive and happy as we can be.
It was great to chat with Niomi as she reminds me of how important self-love is and how much self-worth is reflected in the way how we talk to ourselves and treat ourselves.
We can have it all if we choose things wisely. There is always a time and place for everything, and self-love is certainly one of the things we need.
You can listen to our interview via the podcast above or watch our video below.
Please subscribe to my podcast on iTunes or other podcast catchers, so you won’t miss a show!
https://youtu.be/oyln94LC0KQ
Do you have a story about your self-care journey or something you are battling with? Share with me in the comments below or e-mail me at info@szewingvetault.com.
If you enjoy this blog, please share it on your social media! You will find the buttons below. You may also like to sign up for my inner circle newsletter, as I share my coaching tips,
My friends often ask me this question, "How do you get everything done? How do you do it? Do you sleep?"
My answer is: "Yes, I get about 7 hours a day if my little one doesn't wake me up in the middle of the night."
If you have a lot to manage, say a business, two jobs, several children, or other responsibilities you absolutely cannot delegate, then you really need to be aware of your habits, because some of them are better than others.
The formula of just putting more hours in simply doesn't work. It is not about working harder, it is about working smarter that will lift your game.
I love to learn about different tips & tools on productivity and I have been "collecting" and "testing" them over the years. What I've learned is that you may actually need to modify those tools or habits to make them work for you, instead of the other way round.
For example, if you are a night owl and hate the mornings, or you work late at night, you may find planning the night before you go to bed works better than planning your day first thing in the morning when you wake up.
I'd suggest you give my suggestions a try first, and then consider what modifications you may need to add more clarity or energy for you. Make them your own!
So, here are my Top 5 Easy-To-Do Habits to Skyrock Your Productivity:
Plan your day ahead
A wise one said: "If you fail to plan, you plan to fail". Let's say we don't need to be this dramatic, but I believe in planning ahead so that I am clear about what I need to do for the day, and through consistent daily actions, I know I am moving closer to my goals.
Here is what I normally do. In the morning, within 30 mins upon rising, I craft out some quiet time alone and use my daily planner to plan my day ahead. I look at my weekly planner first to see my appointments or calls for the day and my must-do list. Then, I simply move the items and allocate them over to my day planner, I also add notes such as "bring gym bag" or "mention my vacation" at the 1 pm call.
My daily planner has a little section for self-reflection and I use it to put down a few thoughts or things that I am grateful for. It takes about 5-10 mins each morning to do this, but I get really clear about what I need to do for the rest of the day. I feel more in control and if I need to make changes, it is also very easy to see if it can work or not.
Now, my weekly planner is where I put all my calls, meetings, appointments and events. Don't think it is all complicated, it is not. Keep everything simple and to the point. Once you start doing this, you will realise it is actually very easy to do.
Sidenote: I like early mornings because it is quiet. I often stretch for a few minutes while waiting for my tea to brew. Then, I take about 10-15 to do a short meditation. I love my ritual because it makes me feel good and centred. I have a clear mind as I have haven't been interrupted by the world of news or social media. I then plan my day ahead because this is the time I feel I am at my best to really think about what really matters to me and if things don't quality to my must-do list, they just got to go!
Make sure you DO NOT look at your phone or emails BEFORE you do this. You need a clear mind and focus on YOUR day, not what everyone else is trying to tell you or ask from you.
Break it down
Be specific with your tasks and start your sentence with a verb, not a noun. On your day planner, where you list your must-dos for the day, instead of writing "Marketing Plan", break it down to the actual tasks such as "Schedule 3 x FB post" or "Find 5 x images for Instagram Ads". There is a lot of research suggest that you have a much higher chance to complete your tasks with this simple tweak. You also have a much better estimation of how long each of these tasks will take. There is nothing more frustrating and discouraging than keep on pushing the timeline for the tasks because you cannot complete those t...
Are you a creative (e.g. musician, artist, writer, poet, designer, dancer, etc.) who feels uncomfortable to talk about your work as a business?
If you want to make your creative work a full-time job or a business, then this is an interview you really need to listen/watch.
In this week’s podcast, apart from my personal updates/lessons learned, I also included my interview with Monica O’Brien, a coach who has been working with creatives for years. However, Monica's story didn’t start in a way you may expect.
The following is a recap of the main points we discussed in the interview:
Monica was trained and worked as a nurse in her early years. She then worked with a lot of youth before "accidentally” became a music producer and founded a publishing company. Since then she has been working with creatives like composers and artists, and eventually, she became a coach and work with them in that capacity.
I love her story because it just shows us how we don’t know what may be the next surprise on our paths, and we just need to go and explore and be true to who we are.
[click_to_tweet tweet="Your life is evolving and so is your purpose and passion. The universe has its plans for you, but you may not be able to see the full picture just yet. " quote="Your life is evolving and so is your purpose and passion. The universe has its plans for you, but you may not be able to see the full picture just yet. " theme="style1"]
Here are some of the mindset issues that we've discussed in our interview:
There is no money in creative work or being an artist - is that really true? Or is it just your fear speaking?
You can be a good artist OR a brilliant business person. Wait - but these two things are not mutually exclusive!
Go-Pro: I love this concept by Stephen Pressfield. What does it mean when you are committed to become a professional, instead of treating what you do as a hobby? Are you willing to go Pro?
Authentic marketing: It is about being who you are, sharing your passion and talent, it is not about hard selling or cold calling.
When you do your creative work for a living, you need to find ways to monetize what you do. You’ll need to decide if you want to keep it as a hobby or something that generates income. Even better, you may want to diversify ways that you can generate multiple streams of income.
If you are a painter, you can sell your original artwork, or digital copies, or make it into prints or stationary or craft paper, or teach painting in person or online. There are numerous ways to share your art and your passion.
Just know that you don’t have to do it all. When you make your creative work as a business, some of the tasks will be unappealing to you. You still need to do it, but you may consider to out-source, get help or delegate. If you don’t have the budget to do so, you can try to barter with other creatives or join similar interests Facebook groups or communities. If you start looking, there are many ways you can support one another.
Many people even find the idea of “marketing” uncomfortable, but it’s time to think about this differently. You can find ways that you feel comfortable to share what you love. Social media is a big help for that. Ed Sheeran started to share his music on YouTube and look at him today! Do you find him like a hard-sell kind of guy? Not at all! It is about being who you are!
Nurture your creativity and don’t let fear to overpower you.
Take one step at a time. If you need a day job to support your creative passion, please do that, so that you take the pressure off making money from the creative work to pay the bills. Start small, when your income from the creative work starts to rise, then consider working part-time or quit your day job.
Don’t be afraid to ask for support, get a coach, mentor or join some like-minded free groups. It always makes a huge difference when you have others to share your journey with.
You may have heard of this quote before, "If you do what you love, you'll never work a day in your life" by Marc Anthony. It carries a powerful message that if we do what we love as a job or career, then we will have a very different outlook towards work and what it means to us.
However, I think this is just part of the puzzle. Even if we are lucky enough to get that job, there are still things that we don't like to do within that job. For example, as a coach, I love the aspects of coaching, writing and speaking. But I am not that keen to work on technical tasks such as tracking analytics on my website or social media. Certainly, there are things I can delegate, but there are things I still need to do myself that I may not necessarily enjoy. It is just part of the experience, just look at the people you love, I bet there are things that you don't like so much day in day out too.
Then, there is also the distinction between landing a job vs. a career you love. There are many definitions out there, but for me, the primary difference is that a career is something we build over time and it is likely to take many different jobs to establish that career. Look at popular talk show hosts such as Oprah and Ellen, they both had different jobs before their clearly defined career. Oprah started out as a news anchor and Ellen was a standup comedian. Every job gives us certain skills, experience and relationships and we get to see from a certain perspective or vantage point.
Perhaps jobs are like the means to an end. The jobs we had shaped our career at the end of the day.
So instead of putting all the focus on finding a dream job, how about thinking about the bigger picture, consider if the job in front of us is going to add value to our career.
Please don't get discouraged if you don't enjoy your current job at all, or it is just an in-between or a responsible way to pay the bills. It's totally OK. I know we talk about aspirational things here on my blog often, but I am a totally pragmatic person when it comes to the day-to-day matter. You got to do what you need to do, and that actually shapes your character and experience. Just look at where you want to go, keep looking at that direction with your mind and heart.
As we live in the times where people change their jobs every few years or even shorter, our career tends to evolve through time. Compare to my parents or grandparents' generation, what they started out to learn or to do would normally become their career for life. Besides, with technology advancement, we see new industries or branches within certain industries open up all the time. The global labour marketing is changing its form too, with crowdsourcing and more part-time, freelance employment options become available online.
How to get ready for the future of jobs
Two key points to bear in mind:
1.We need to up-skill and foster a life long learning mentality. As businesses keep changing in a rapid rate and employment trends are shifting in response to these changes, the dream job as we know it may not be there in the future or the skills in demand will change dramatically. Just look the Future of Jobs Report 2018 by the World Economic Forum and see a broader picture. (If you would like me to share more about the future of jobs and skills related research, please comments below. As this is something I am very "passionate" about lately. More about passion later.)
2.We need to know our strength, motivation and interests better. Just going back to the quote at the beginning, if you simply enjoy what you do, the chances are, you'll feel more motivated and productive because you are interested. It also helps you to not just find a job, but jobs that can support your overall career.
Let's be honest, when you are interested in something, you may follow that online, offline or go to events on the weekends. It's on your radar, so you are in the best position to find the right training or ...
For this week's podcast and video, I have a truly empowering interview with Kim Davis for you. Kim is a seasoned counsellor, yoga teacher and career & business coach who specializes in helping people to start their business in their 50s!
I often think when people are in their 50s or 60s, they are in their Golden Age, as they have accumulated some real-life experiences, skills and they have faced a few challenges as well as built up some important relationship over time. Now they are at a place where they know who they are, what they want (or don't want!) and still have the energy to do great things. They may start thinking about retirement from their current job or maybe facing fewer family obligations (children are grown up & independent), they can really start a fresh new chapter if they want to.
However, finding the courage to step outside from their comfort and confidence zone and to move forward into a new direction can be very challenging. Therefore, once again lead to my most common advice: Just one small step at a time. You just gotta move forward.
Last week in my blog The Fear of Not Being Enough, I talked about how over-thinking and analysis paralysis can stop us from moving towards where our hearts want to take us. We feel doubtful, worried and sacred by the "What If We Fail" thoughts.
When we do that, we give our power away and we drop our chances.
More often than not, it is because our vision is SO BIG and WONDERFUL and it can be overwhelming to imagine what it may take to get us THERE.
But if we just focus on 1 small action at a time, we will be on our way and the anxiety we feel will also start to disappear.
The problem is, we tend to underestimate the power of taking small actions consistently.
We are constantly searching for big breaks and quick wins, but in fact, it is the small steps that prepare us to take on the big jumps or leaps when the opportunity arises.
Also, whatever we think our destination is, it may shift ever so slightly or dramatically when we get closer to it.
We would be at a different vantage point later down the track and change what we think or feel about what is best for us.
BUT remember, we have to go on that track in the first place.
We must listen to our instinct instead of our fear, and to take actions no matter how small.
Fulfiling your dreams and vision
Kim is in her 60s and I love what she said in the interview, "Youth has a lot in its favour". When she was in her late 20s, she participated in a youth leadership program and got inspired to go with a group to create "World Youth", a charity foundation that is still running today. The group had a dream to change the world but they were not sure how to do that. The youth group went to Nepal and saw the needs of the local people and they decided to take on several community development projects. Eventually, they built a school for young children with 500 students and a home for orphans with over 50 children living there today.
They had a dream, a vision. They took small steps towards that direction.
In Kim's words: "We were passionate and hopeful. We just kept going and be playful while doing serious and meaningful work. We were not stressed or worried about what is going to work or not, we just focused on the present day, a day at a time."
By just doing what is in front of her, following the steps laid down by the universe, she was the first western woman lived at a monastery in Nepal while she was doing her work there.
She told me that back in her early days in Nepal, women were very restricted because of their culture but at the same time, they managed to help and support each other. She loved working with local women and to empower them in finding their feet, fighting for their passion or creating local businesses to better their lives.
Kim continued to serve on the charity board for 20 years but now has stepped back and let younger women lead the way.
It happens to all of us. Sometimes we get over it easily, sometimes we don't.
The tricky thing is: the bigger or better the things are at stake, the fear of not being good enough always gets bigger too. We may even decide it's safer to just stay put. (or is it?)
Picture these two scenarios with me.
Sarah was at a new product meeting at work with senior management, all of a sudden, she got an edgy but really cool idea that may change the game of marketing for this product. She wanted to say something when her boss looked at her. But within seconds, she swallowed that thought.
Joey has been dancing at a local Salsa social club for 9 months and there was an audition for a performance at the end of the year. Some of his friends were going for the tryout. He would love to do it but he kept putting it off to even sign up for the audition.
Well, should they go for it?
You may say, it depends on how good was Sarah's idea or Joey's dancing skills. Right?
Well, hmmm. Nope.
None of that really matters.
They were both afraid to fail or being judged as "not good enough" so they prefer not even try.
But here is the thing. If they actually give themselves the chance to try, they may succeed or at the very least win by having the courage.
The next time when something comes up, it will be less threatening and they may go for it again. So you see, it is almost like some form of mental practice.
Finding Courage and Being Vulnerable
You may think it is our thinking or worrying that get in the way. But in fact, it was the FEELING of what If no one else approves or validates or believes or trusts or ... even likes me... that get in the way.
We don't like that feeling of not good enough, and we think/talk ourselves out of the risk of having that feeling.
But what if I tell you that it's Sarah's dream to advance to a management position, she needs to show others that she is creative and innovative, exactly what the company needs and her boss knows that too.
As for Joey, he is actually really good in Salsa, people at the club were already noticing that and by the way, his future wife would land a spot at the same performance team and that's how they would meet … IF HE WENT FOR IT ….
Now, aren't you going to say, OMG, in that case, go for it, Sarah and Joey!!!
That's why I'd say, sometimes, our feelings are overrated
What I mean is this:
Feelings may not be true, it may just be self-doubt and worry that have no evidence to back up
How we feel can be affected by many things, including factors like: did you have adequate sleep last night? Do you exercise regularly or have good nutrition in your body?
We need to get over ourselves, it is not always about YOU, look at the bigger picture and focus on how you may serve or contribute or impact others for a greater good.
Sometimes it is about YOU, but daring to try and to face our fear is what set you apart. It takes courage, which is not easy to come by.
If you would like a more successful and inspiring life, it is super important to cultivate a mindset that is not fixated but focus on growth and possibilities.
It may feel challenging, uncomfortable and frightening but if we instinctively know there is something we must do in order to achieve our goals or dream, then we must give ourselves the chance.
Don't be the person who stands in your way to achieve greatness.
Take action.
What is the 1 thing you keep on avoiding, procrastinating or ignoring, but you know deep down it is actually something really good for you to Just Do it?
When you decide to face your fear, you win.
When you decide to believe in your self-worth, you win.
When you decide to trust your instinct and stop letting your thoughts to talk you out of doing something good for you, you win.
When we allow ourselves to face our vulnerability, that is when we will find our courage.
This is a passage taken from my ebook, 21 Days of Inspiration: Daily Wisdom for Living an Inspired Life. You can read the passage below or listen to my podcast about my personal experience of having patience.
There is a line in A Course in Miracles that says, “Infinite patience produces an immediate result.” It may seem to contradict itself at first glance, but looking at it from a spiritual perspective it makes total sense.
When we become overly attached to a specific outcome we feel frustrated or impatient because this or that hasn’t happened or the outcome is not the way we want it to be.
We keep thinking and energetically focusing on what we don’t want instead of what we do want. And as the intelligence of the universe responds to energy—that is, our emotions—not what we say we want, the universe will keep providing us with what we don’t want instead.
As the saying goes, what we focus on will expand and grow. If we choose differently we can let go of that frustration and fixation; we can trust that the universe has our back.
We know that what we want will come at the right time and place, and if it doesn’t, then something better will.
With this “infinite patience” we completely let go of the need to have exactly what we want. It provides immediate relief from the feeling of lack. The chances are that what we want will then come to us naturally; as we are no longer focusing on what we don’t want, the universe can deliver to us what we do want.
There is no order of difficulty in miracles, and we are living in a miraculous universe. Science tells us that the world around us is made up of energy, and we all have the power and ability to influence the reality around us based on our emotions.
Patience is truly a gift; it helps us to manifest and thrive in the world we live in.
Reflection for today:
What am I impatient about?
Why?
What would happen if I became more patient about these things?
If you enjoy this passage, you can download my ebook book 21 Days of Inspiration: Daily Wisdom of Living an Inspired Life by signing up here.
Last week on my train home there was a homeless man giving a speech. He was asking for some spare change so that he could afford a shelter for the night. He looked sad and he had been apologizing throughout the entire time, saying he was sorry that he bothered us and so on.
I looked around the train, most people didn’t want to meet his eyes.
I know there may be people who think this man was probably a drug addict or a “professional” beggar.
But I also know there are many people who were feeling sorry for him. Yet, it was hard for most of us to meet his eyes.
Because no matter what he did in the past, his eyes were full of sorrow and shame.
As a human being looking at another human being, you can’t help but feel that pain in his soul. That’s why it is so hard to meet his eyes.
I notice myself since I became a mother, I can no longer ignore the sight of sufferings. I have more sympathy and concern for the misfortunes of others. I may not always understand or able to imagine others' pain, but I can most definitely relate better than before.
I know more deeply about our human nature is always geared towards love. But when love is absent or taken away from us, we feel lost, sad, ashamed and broken.
The truth is, this is also a call for love.
Be Kind. Be Generous with Love.
Compassion is different from empathy. While empathy refers more generally to our ability to take the perspective of and feel the emotions of another person, compassion is when those feelings and thoughts include the desire to help.
That’s the invite to extend ourselves, in the ways we can or know, to show love and help one another.
It may be giving some change or simply looking into the eyes of that homeless man to acknowledge him, silently saying, I’ve heard you.
When we hear a friend or someone we know is having a difficult time, we don’t necessarily have to make a great gesture or solve their problem for them, most often than not, we cannot. But what we can do is to extend love, kindness and be generous with our heart.
Sometimes even just say, “Are you ok? I am here if you want to talk.” and just be there and listen.
A hug may seem like nothing, but it can mean a lot for the other.
As human beings, we all want to connect and be acknowledged. And there is one thing in common between both our greatest achievements and our deepest sorrow. They both matter to our hearts.
Often, we underestimate the impact of what a small act of kindness can do, it may just be the sign or turning point or the light that someone is longing to see.
So let’s no longer withheld that light.
Be kind and generous.
Live wholeheartedly.
And answer the call for love.
*The event mentioned at my podcast is called "Goddesses & Crystals", it is a full day event on 15 June (Sat) in Sydney, hosted by myself and Shelley McConaghy. You can find out more about this event here. https://goddessesandcrystals.eventbrite.com.au
This week I have an interview with healer and teacher Lorelie Luna for you. We talked about her journey and why she advocates deeply about being compassionate to yourself and others.
You can listen to our interview via the player above or through my podcast on iTunes and other podcast catchers. You can also watch the interview here:
https://youtu.be/fx_iPM89V-A
Do you have a story about compassion and kindness? Share with me in the comments below or e-mail me at info@szewingvetault.com or FB message me @CoachSzeWing
Don’t forget my Facebook Live Mondays at 7 pm AEST, I am here to answer your questions, you can FB message me @coachSzeWing in advance to send your questions. You can also watch the replay on my youtube channel.
If you'd like to stay connected or inspired, come and join me on my facebook page. If you would like to receive my inspirational eBook "21 Days of Inspiration” you can get it here FREE of charge!
In my late twenties, I was being told that I should focus on one particular profession or interest, as having many of them in life may sabotage my future.
On one hand, I wanted to take that advice because it came from someone who is rather accomplished in her profession. But on the other hand, I felt that is NOT the answer for me and I felt there is a bigger story behind it all.
But I just didn’t know how to articulate and explain all the connections between my choices and subsequent experiences.
I was tormented by 2 imaginary scenes:
A.) In the not-so-near future, someone would say something behind my back along the lines of this: “What a waste of potentials, she could have done better with her life.”
B.) In my old age and set ways, I sadly regret what I didn’t dare to do and be true to “Who I am” but became the person who others expected me to be.
I have to admit, it was a challenging time in my life.
I was really eager to find out my passion and purpose of life so that I can work REALLY hard on them and to prevent the two scary imaginary scenarios from happening. I wished I was one of those who just KNEW what they want to do when they grow up, full of purpose and fueled with passion.
However, that was not my path, nor the right learning progression for my life.
Other people’s opinion is just an opinion. Trust your inner knowing.
Years ago, I graduated from prestigious universities and started my career as an economist. But before long, I went into TV & media and a few years later I got hired as a consultant. So it may look like I was all over the map. On the side, I slowly found my passion in learning about spirituality and living in a more conscious manner. Various life experiences (both good AND bad), mentors and self-reflection lead me there. All the jobs and major life events have built and shaped me into the person that I needed to be. The time it took and mistakes I made are all for my own learning, and probably, benefits too. Eventually, I became a transformational coach, speaker and author in the field of personal development.Looking back, I have to say even though it was hard at times, I have followed my bliss and I am feeling deeply inspired and grateful about my life now.
In the years I was trying to “figure it out”, I realized we don’t have to try so hard and to be 1000% sure, our passion and purpose will be revealed to us, simply follow your interest or curiosity and follow through with actions. Most importantly, listen to your inner voice not everyone's opinions.
Finding your passion and purpose in life is an inside job and it takes time
What I have learned in my own hard-earned self-exploration is that finding your passion and purpose is an inside job. There are numerous books and talks advocating how important that is, and all the “how-to” ways to find your passion or purpose. They may help you to “look” in the right direction, but ultimately, you can’t rely on any tests or advice from anyone, it is an inner learning experience.
You have to come to an inner knowing what is calling you and what it may translate into. It took some time, but step-by-step, I came to KNOW myself in a way no one can ever tell me so. I love doing what I do, and I am no longer a hostage of my own fear about under-achievement or misalignment with who I really am.
Passion and Purpose in Life can be related or simply co-exist, without being the same thing.
First of all, we may have a purpose or calling that is related to work or career matters. Say, creating a non-profit for a humanitarian cause, or a business start-up, or become a curator of an art museum or a visual artist. But we may also have our own unique purpose that is about relationships. We may deeply call to be a great mother, a loyal friend, a supportive family member or a life-long partner for our spouse.
In fact, I see in most cases we have both or one becomes more apparent at a different stage.
Whenever I struggle with something, I always look for real-life stories that will lift me up and inspire me to keep going when the going gets tough.
One of the stories always stands out for me is J.K. Rowling before she becomes known as the author of the Harry Potter series. She was suffering from depression and poverty as a single mother.
The only thing she knew is true for her is her love of writing. Hers was certainly not an overnight success story as she has been struggling for years. She was rejected numerous times before her best-selling series finally got published.
She just kept going.
When I read about all the legendary people, like Lincoln, Oprah, Einstein, Gandhi or Disney. The common theme among all of them is one single fact.
They never gave up.
Celebrate your wins and breakthrough
It is great if you have some wins and victories along the way. Never underestimates those. Because sometimes there is absolutely no evidence to support or validate our vision until a breakthrough happens.
We simply don’t know what is ahead of us. We may think we know, but the universe has its own way to surprise and reward us.
You don’t know if your breakthrough is just around the corner.
All great things take time and there is no overnight success. You may get discovered by some very influential people or the mass audience one day, but it is always “long-time coming”.
Stay motivated is the key to succeed in the long run
You may like to read those success stories to keep being inspired. Or you can work with a coach, mentor or teacher to learn how to get better in what you do. You may like to set some challenges, goals or milestone to keep you on track. Regardless, it is about consistent effort and genuine care about your dream that will get you there.
This week I interviewed my friend and colleague Denise Jarvie on this topic. Denise is a soul coach, intuitive, meditation teacher and creator of many beautiful oracle card decks. She shared with us how her latest popular deck "The Secret Language of Light" get published and all the ups and downs along the way.
You can listen to our interview via the player above or through my podcast on iTunes and other podcast catchers. You can also watch our video interview below.
https://youtu.be/fH072l0sMYo
Denise and I are going to present a full-day “play-shop" - Goddess and Light Masterclass in Sydney on 18 May 2019. If you want to get some clarity or inspiration with your work or relationship. Or if you are interested to learn how to tune into your inner wisdom and practice soul writing. Sign up for this special event!
If you enjoy my inspiration videos and interviews, please subscribe to my Youtube channel to stay in the loop!
Share with me your Never-Give-Up stories in the comments below or e-mail me at info@szewingvetault.com or FB message me @CoachSzeWingIf you'd like to stay connected or inspired, come and join me on my facebook page @coachSzeWing or sign up for my newsletter for insider news!
I remember when I first started out as a coach, some days I would feel so pumped and thrilled to work with my clients. But somedays I would feel doubtful and ask “Who am I to do this?” or “What if they don’t like what I have to say?”.
I love it when I could see the expression of my clients' faces started to shift, or their voices lifted and I knew they were feeling inspired and confident with their next move.
The strange thing is, how I felt beforehand didn’t really affect the result. Once I started the session, I forgot about the self-doubt or my self-judgment. Simply put, once I hit the ground, I start running, and it’s all good from there.
It is all in my head.
The imposter syndrome is a psychological pattern in which we doubt our accomplishments and have a persistent internalized fear of being exposed as a “fraud”.
Over the years, I got better at this, especially when I heard from a very well established best-selling author saying she has this fear with every book launch. She felt she would be “caught” and people would find out her books actually aren’t any good. I heard that in a book fair and there were a few well-known authors in the same panel, and unsurprisingly, they all agreed and said the same thing.
So here are the 3 facts I found that have helped me to overcome this
Know that everyone experiences imposter syndrome from time to time.
There are days when things don’t turn out the way we expected, or we haven’t got our morning coffee or breakfast, or we missed our morning meditation. We are human and our negative emotions can get the best of us. So remember it’s not just you, EVERYONE feels like that sometimes, but it is just a feeling, and it can come and go.
It’s not about you
There is a saying, “When you are nervous, focus on service.” When we start to compare ourselves with others, who may appear to be more successful or better at getting what we want, we stop focusing on doing real work and what really matters. We suffer from comparison paralysis, we can’t move forward when we are constantly beating ourselves up for not good enough. It often happens when we are thinking or judging about ourselves. If we shift our focus onto the impact and contribution we are meant to make for others or the world, it stops the comparison paralysis, as we know, every effort count.
It’s about progress, not perfection
Standard and quality in what we do certainly matters, but don’t let perfection to stop you from actually get moving. If we wait for the perfect time and perfect place, that perfect situation may never come. Your product or service or unique contribution to the world may never see the light of the day. Also, through learned experiences, you will get closer to perfection. You can only get better at what you do when you practice what you do.
What is your experience with imposter syndrome or comparison paralysis, and how did you get out of it?
Share with me in the comments below or e-mail me at info@szewingvetault.com or FB message me @CoachSzeWing
Don’t forget my Facebook Live Mondays at 7 pm AEST, I am here to answer your questions, and you can submit your questions online here in advance too.
If you'd like to stay connected or inspired, come and join me on my facebook page @coachSzeWing or sign up for my newsletter for insider news!
In my interview with raw food educator and personal coach Vicki Cook, we talked about what various types of food cravings may mean emotionally. We are all different and what we need physically and emotionally are different too, but there are some generalization that can apply. For instance, when we crave for chocolate, it tends to be about wanting to feel loved. Many of us find soft white bread as a source of comfort food. Personally, when I crave for crunchy things, it tends to be because I want new adventure or excitements in my life. (and it does happens rather often!)
Tuning into our Inner Voice and Inner Wisdom
When we understand our cravings, it also leads to a better understanding of what is happening in our emotional world too. Are there feelings that we are not admitting to ourselves and we are trying to push them down with food? Vicki spoke about how we can reclaim our lives through food, start by knowing what our body and soul really need and then nourish ourselves with that. So tuning in, whether it is through meditation, journaling or simply asking our heart, it is the first step to get closer to finding the gaps and restoring the balance we need.
Seasons of Change
In my book "Goddess with Many Faces" I spoke about the concept of women cycle of life, where we go through Maiden (Spring), Mother (Summer), Matriarch (Autumn) and Wise Woman (Winter). The seasons of change is inevitable, our biology and maturity both lead us into the next phrases. But how we mage the advantages or challenges is another matter. Vicki talked about how seasonal eating, following our intuition and in accordance with nature is vital to better well-being. She introduced us to 8 seasons, not 4 in our interview. It is fascinating for me to hear her how to use food and inner wisdom to navigate the seasons of change and find success and peace within.
You can listen to our full interview with the player above this blog or watch the video below too!
Shownotes:
Why do we craving for certain food? Tuning into our inner wisdom and reclaim our life Empowerment starts from within We all go through seasons and cycle of life How to navigate changes and stages
https://youtu.be/JlGzODzZIFE
I hope you find my interview useful and inspirational! Please subscribe to my Youtube channel to watch more inspiration videos or listen to my podcast on iTunes and other podcast catchers.
I'd love to hear your stories. Tell me about your own food craving stories by leaving a comment on my blog or email me at info@szewingvetault.com or FB message me @CoachSzeWing
If you'd like to stay connected or inspired, come and join me on my facebook page @coachSzeWing or sign up for my newsletter for insider news!
People often ask me how did I get the idea to put my work into my book “Goddess with Many Faces”.
The truth is, I didn’t.
I have been researching, working and teaching about subconscious mind, archetypes, the wisdom of the goddess myths, and how to find your personal myth as a way of coaching and empowering people. It was, however, not in my conscious mind to put everything together into a book, but the universe has a plan to lead me into doing it.
Back in December 2015, I went to visit the Perfect Potion store in QVB Sydney around Christmas time. By chance, I got into a conversation with the founder Salvatore Battaglia in the store. Little did I know eventually he would be the person who encourages me to write this book and help me to distribute it too. I am of course deeply grateful to all his help and inspiration.
Being Authentic
I am very fortunate to have Sal like a mentor with my work, and I am also an enthusiast in aromatherapy and a healthy lifestyle, so we certainly have a lot of talk about! That was exactly how our conversation started, about rare essential oils. But here is the thing, if I’ve tried to strike up a conversation back in 2015 purely for business interest, it would have never worked. It is impossible to form a genuine relationship with anyone if one is constantly thinking, “What is in it for me?” or “How is this person or company can help me with ___?”.
So often when you talk to someone at a networking or business event, you can feel those lines running through their mind, or in fact, their eyes, as they are constantly scanning across the room to see if there is anyone else more important to talk to. Everything becomes so transactional, instead of relational.
On the other hand, when a person got hired it is not always because the person who has the best CV or when business got contracted it is merely because of the price. It is, in fact, the feeling about the person or the relationship established that makes us decide who do we want to work with.
From a spiritual perspective, all minds are joined, there is no place where you stop and I start. When you are being authentic, people can feel it. When you are fully present to someone and genuinely interested in a conversation, people know it too.
How gratitude create abundance
The more grateful you are, you have more to be grateful for.Oprah Winfrey
I believe this is what Oprah said on many occasions. And I truly believe this is true.
Recently I presented at two events, both hosted by Perfect Potion. I had a great time speaking and it was such an honour to teach one of the events with Sal, who has been in his industry for 30 plus years. I certainly have a lot to learn. I am also really grateful for the warm, open and engaged audience!
I have another example of how gratitude works in magical ways. A few years back, I co-founded and co-hosted the LightenUp Online Summit with Deborah Shepherd, the founder of the wonderful Embrace Life Festivals. Before that, we worked on a collaborative movement called Gratitude, which is another example of how good things came together. From the whole chain of events, I also got to meet many incredible entrepreneurs in the health & wellness industry, which is like joining a soul community!
For me, that is a true success, being able to do what I love and able to share with people who have similar vision and core values.
When you hold positive and loving thoughts, and with gratitude and appreciation in your heart, inevitably you will become ultra present and super focused on your purpose. It is also the effect of the law of attraction. What you think about affects how you feel, and it determines the energy you radiate and attract. Joy, abundance, success, happiness are like the collective benefits if you have that attitude of gratitude!
Live Coaching Mondays on Facebook Live
As part of connecting and giving to my community,
We all have to face this challenge at some point in our life, whether it is about our relationships, career or business changes, moving to another location or into a new home. I certainly had a few of these "Starting over" episodes. I moved from Hong Kong to Norway, then to London, then Adelaide, Brisbane and eventually Sydney. I have been through a few relationships and career changes, and I can confidently say that starting over can be a really exciting event but it can also be such a drag. It completely depends on the way you look at it i.e. your mindset and the expectation of the outcome.
Endings are New Beginnings
Endings are often hard for us, no matter we get to plan for it, or it just happens suddenly. Even if we have time to reflect and eventually commit to an end, it can bring up a lot of memories as well as the reasons why this relationship or that business started in the first place. You may know it 100% true in your heart that it is time to let go it doesn't mean it is any easier, it requires courage and trust in yourself.
I remember when I decided to change my career path from economics and social policy to film and advertising. I didn’t consider all that much about the financial trajectory or lifestyle consequences, I was merely banking on passion and intuition. I knew I have to change, and even though I didn’t know where the path would lead me into, I felt I need to give myself a chance to and move on.
The same with many of my past relationships, I used to say, if the old one didn't come to an end, I wouldn't get to know the next one. But I have to admit, there were times I asked myself, will this ever end? I mean one unsuccessful relationship followed by another. "There are no failed relationships - you learn and grow from each one". When I look back, it was definitely true, but it was just too hard to believe and accept that when I was in the deep of it.
But we don’t get to be in the deep forever, we move on, evolve and grow. So here are my approaches when it comes to starting over:
Adopt a Growth Mindset
As compared to a fixed mindset, meaning we predict how things will turn out based on our past or beliefs. Try to allow life to surprise us, for the better, and try to avoid to be fixated on the way how things should turn out, be flexible to the notion that something better can come along. You do your homework, take the necessary actions and/or learning that are required for the outcome you desire, but after that, let go and be patient. Just like baking, you just have to let it rise.
Use Your Heart Intelligence
There will be times when we are not sure if we have made the right decision or if the direction we are taking is right for us. That is normal and healthy. What we need to do is to check-in with our heart intelligence. We often have the answers within us, but we are so busy listening to the noise and our ego-mind chatter. Find a way to get quiet, whether it is through meditation, or going for a swim or walk in the park. Ask your heart what should be your next steps. You can always get an opinion from family or friends, experts, coaches or professionals around you, but remember those are just their opinions, YOU have the answers within you so don't forget to listen to that, as it is the most important one!
Create Your Support Network
When you decide to start over and to end the last chapter, start preparing for the transition. If it is appropriate, tell those who are closest to you, let them know what kind of help or support you may need. It can be about giving you a hand on things or leaving you alone without giving you all their comments and how-to. You know what you need more or less of. People are often respectful as long as you can communicate clearly to them. Also look out for support groups, meet-ups or communities of people who are going through a similar transition. I know for sure you can find your group on social media.
Why should you stop procrastinating ?
We have all experienced procrastination. We know what we need to do, and we know what is good for us, but we just don’t do it, or cannot bring ourselves to finish what we’ve started.
Your scenario may be about finishing a book you have been writing or wanting to write. Or you may have been trying to set up a non-profit or business for ages. It seems to take forever to finish that website or write that newsletter- the way you like it. You may have heard yourself saying “I’ll get back into dating/exercising/meditation/XYZ soon” but "soon" hasn't come yet.
All these just sound all too familiar.
We keep procrastinating and it is draining our energy. There is an invisible reminder hanging on our shoulder and it is heavy, restricting and simply, not fun.
However, when we finally roll up our selves and get cracking, things tend to fall into two scenarios.
Scenario one, you quickly realize this “thing” you have been trying to do is just NOT for you. There is no point in hustling once you see the bigger picture. But you only get to know this after you get your hands dirty and on the ground.
You cannot go over it, you cannot go under it, you have to go through it! (Yes, this line is from the children’s book “We are going on a bear hunt” which I have to read to my daughter at least 3 times a week … ? But it really sticks with me now.
Scenario two, once we started to do something about it consistently, we gather momentum and it just keeps getting easier and easier to move forward. The "thing" you have been so hang up on is not as nearly as hard as you thought.
So how do we stop procrastinating?
Here is the thing, we all intellectually KNOW it, but in order to STOP it, we need to have a closer look at resistance and then understand what we can do about it.
Resistance is something you cannot reason with. It is a force of nature. It is like a shadow, it follows you and it should not lead you.
Everyone experience resistance, not just you. So don’t feel unworthy and starting saying in your head that you are not good enough, it is not meant to be or it will never amount to anything.
No. No. No. No. No.
Henry Ford said that “Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t, you are right."
Resistance is like our ego, it is fueled by fear and therefore, illusions.
Resistance clouds your judgement, it stops you from seeing even if you are about to turn the corner, it hides the destination that is in front of you. Therefore, you can’t see how far or close you are in relationship to your destination.
Three strategies to overcome resistance to change
Really know your WHY and watch out for the SHOULD
If you have a heart-to-heart conversation with yourself, and really understand the reasons why you want to do/be/get/change, it will clarify and re-ignite your inspiration and supercharge your motivation. In comparison, the reasons that are caused by social conditioning will become apparent and you will stop to take those actions that are not in alignment with your values and beliefs.
I caught myself so many times in trying to do so much, and when I got so overwhelmed and exhausted, I had to be really honest with myself and select the single thing that matter the most, and it always comes down to the WHY when I have to make a choice.
Find your path of least resistance
You may have a big vision, but please start with a small step. For example, you want to help 100,000 children to gain access to education. Start with how to help 1 child to get 1 book or get 1 organization onboard with your vision. Don’t try to run before you can walk. Start with the end in mind and reverse engineer what you need in order to get there. Then, set realistic milestone and stages, and take 1 action at a time. You will find it much easier to commit to taking one small step a day than declare you will get to the mountain top one day.
Some people need to see it before they believe it.
Some people believe it and they see it.
Since I was a little girl, I love to play with the energy between my hands, I didn’t know what it was about, but I just love that pausing sensation. As I came to learn about crystals and how they also contain energy, I was intrigued.
Growing up in Chinese culture, the concept of “Chi”, which means energy, is something rather common and natural to us. Chi Gong is a very well known and widely practiced ancient healing modality. “Chi” is also a fundamental concept in Chinese herbal medicine. So I guess I have an easy start with energy-related healing modalities.
Is “Chi” visible? No. Not to our naked eyes.
But is it real? I think so.
Is “Love” real? Definitely. But can we see it? I guess not!
It is the expression of love we see and experience. As with energy healing, once again, it is about the experience.
For me, if a healing session brings me more peace, ease and comfort, or more energy and balance, it is just simply a bliss. For some, it can help with past trauma, emotional and physical issues, anxiety and depression, and without any drugs or invasive procedures, it certainly is a worth-considering experience.
This is what my interview with Shelley McConaghy is about. The healing experience. Shelley is an energy and crystal healer. Her first encounter with crystals was during a vacation when she was 8. Many years later, she took a two-day course on crystals and she fell in love with the energy and the whole healing aspect of them. Eventually, she became a professional healer and make crystals and energy healing as her work of passion.
In our interview, we also talked about how she now offer duo practitioners healing with her life partner, to bring in both feminine and masculine energy in the healing session. Now, speaking about her life partner, she told us about their love story, for instance, how they met and eventually work together, which is also truly magical.
Universe has a plan for each for us. Sometimes we just don’t know it yet, but all will be revealed at the right time and right place. If we force our way into things or fixed on the ways how things should turn out, we will just end up with frustrations and disappointment.
Believe it and you will see it.
For more blogs and other resources, come and visit https://SzeWingVetault.com
Interview Show Notes:
Shelley’s first encounter with crystals and their energy
How she became a healer
The biggest change in her life since she followed her passion to become a professional healer
Be aware of the false starts, and why a slow transition may be better for the long run for our career/business
Our body is always telling us what we need to know
How she met her life partner and how her intuition knows
Working together as duo practitioner to balance both feminine and masculine energies
Self-care and spiritual practice for a healing practitioner
To become a great healer or practitioner, it takes time, discipline and work
How to choose a healer or wellness practitioner that is right for you
The universe has a plan, trust it, lean on it. The universe has your back
Shelley offers in-person healing in Northern Beaches NSW, Australia. You can find more information about her on www.DivineBalance.com.au
You can listen to this week’s podcast on the top of this post, or on iTunes or any major podcast catcher. You can also watch our interview below. If you enjoy my vidoes, please subscribe to my YouTube channel and Podcast so you won’t miss a show!
Last thing, if you haven’t signed up to my mailing list to get the inner circle news and my free eBook: 21 Days of Inspiration, make sure you sign up here!
https://youtu.be/csur8WmEe4k
In this masterclass, I spoke about our Feminine Spirit, how important it is to understand and balance our feminine and musculin energy within us, in fact, that is what the sacred union is really about. Also, how the role and expectations of women have been changing in the last 100 years and interestingly, how Goddess was actually the first deity to be worshipped since the beginning of mankind. I asked this question deep in our heart: "Who are we?" and "Who am I"? If you would like to get a boost on self-empowerment or to uplift your feminine spirit, watch the video or listen to the podcast for this week!
I was up in Brisbane last Saturday to celebrate the International Women's Day with a group of conscious and inspired women at the Perfect Portion headquarter. I delivered this Masterclass live in person over there. It was my absolute pleasure to speak about this topic and I also really enjoyed the discussions and questions after. Everyone has a story to tell, and through people's journey, there is always a lesson to learn. Each of us has a unique gift to share with the world, sometimes it is about our talent or success, but sometimes it is about our experience and truth that inspire others. Although I couldn't share the live event with you, I've decided to record the talk/presentation content and share with you this way.
This is a happy snap at the end of our event. To my left is the founder of Perfect Potion Salvatore Battaglia and to his left, Jennifer Jeffries who presented her Aromatherapy Insight Cards in the afternoon.
One of the key question I asked in the masterclass was "Who are we?" as women of today. Mothers? Lovers? Teachers? Pathfinders? Carers? Healers? Leaders? The next question is "Who are you?". I spoke about the goddess archetypes during the masterclass to help individuals to see their inner patterns as well as those around them. By knowing and understanding the "who", we get to accept and appreciate the "why" a lot easier.
For example, I like to use the example of Athena, the archetype of a strategist. As she is always smart, wise and intellectual. If you have an Athena sister and you just told her about your nasty breakup with your boyfriend, you may likely to hear something like "It is better for you this way." or "I think you should read this book, there are good information for your situation". And most likely, no big bear hug or chocolate or ice-cream... You get the picture.
It is not that she doesn't care, but her responses may be VERY different from yours. If you have a Demeter sister instead (the goddess archetype of Mother & Nurturer), she will definitely love to look after you physically and emotionally. Not one is better than another, they are just different people.
Later in the seminar, I also took the group to a quick Heart Intelligence exercise to connect with their heart and inner wisdom. The "Who are you" question inevitably leads to "Who do you want to become?" or "What is your deepest desire?". The exercise is effective and easy-to-do. If you would like to learn the technique, be sure to watch the video below or listen to the podcast!
https://youtu.be/5qZn7_cdS-M
It is no longer a rare occurrence that most of us have more than one career change in our adult life. With the rapid changes in information technology and artificial intelligence, more and more likely we will face more opportunities and triggers that would launch us into a new career. In fact, we often hear new professions and businesses emerge in today’s world. Sometimes it may be a slight change, say from a copywriter to become a published author. Sometimes it can be a big jump, like my dear friend and business colleague Carole Gridley, who moved from journalism to advertising & marketing and eventually in aromatherapy. She is an aromatherapist, teacher and creator of Festival of Ariel, a brand of personalized natural perfume.
Carole started her career as a journalist and worked in the advertising industry long before she found her passion and purpose in Aromatherapy. I recently interviewed her and we talked about her journey with several career changes and how to manage such transitions.
Sometimes our desire to change comes from the circumstances, but sometimes we have this inner calling that is driving us to move to another direction. To create an inspired and fulfilling life, we need to find work that is meaningful and enjoyable for us. And that is why it is so important to follow our heart, and really understanding what success means to us, individually, and what truly makes us happy.
In this interview, we also talked about her "giving back to carers" project. To learn more about Carole, please visit:
https://www.healthtouchmassage.com.au/ or email her at carolehtmt@gmail.com
Another useful resource you may find helpful is a book called Career Change by Joanna Penn. It has a step-by-step approach to help you to move into a new career. You can get it at https://thecreativepenn.com
I mentioned in the podcast that I will speak at two events. The first one is the Aromatherapy and the Feminine Spirit - a special workshop to celebrate International Women’s Day on 9th March in Brisbane. The second event is the Goddess with Many Faces Masterclass, with special guest Salvatore Battaglia, founder of Perfect Potion, and it will be on the 30th March in Sydney.
Interview Show Notes
Career Change: From Journalism to Advertising to Aromatherapy
Signposts that lead us to change
Self-awareness and inner calling emerge organically
How to handle career transition/s
How the universe responses to our changes
Alignment and flexibility make all the difference
Success means different things to different people
The importance of life-long learning
The use of essential oils for natural therapeutic purposes
Aromatherapy is a highly effective, individualized and personal practice
Give-back project
You can watch the interview here:
https://youtu.be/YuWIzQaPKt8
It happens to everyone. There are days we don't feel as cheerful and positive as usual. Sometimes we feel disappointed or sad because something has happened or not happened in the way we hoped for. We may have missed an opportunity or made a mistake. Someone may have hurt our feelings, or we regret certain things we did or said. No matter how successful, healthy, wealthy or having it all together you may be, there are not-so-sunny days in life. But the thing is, sometimes we don't want to talk about that because we worry what people may think of us, or we don't want even to let people know. This blog and what I have included in the podcast is about how do we handle such times so that we can move through them more manageable and wiser. And trust me, it happens to everyone, and so you are never alone in this situation, which is essentially part of life.
However, what I refer to here is not about chronic or clinical depression, it is indeed a different and more serious scenario, and I am not offering medical advice here and properly treatment may be needed in that case.
What I have observed and experienced in myself and others are situations where our emotions are affected by our thoughts or mindset, and as a result, we feel down or unmotivated in what we usually do.
Often such feelings we experienced is triggered by an external event, like what I have mentioned above. In many cases, it is about something we want to happen, but it didn't happen, or we don't know when it will or if it will at all. It may be about finding a romantic and lasting relationship, or getting a job that we love, or succeeding in our business and financial goals, or it can be about improving our health. There are a few things that I like to remind myself and others when I hear about this type of scenarios:
Not everything is as it seems
Sometimes the fact that you don't get that job or lover is actually better for you, perhaps even a blessing in disguise. We may even know it in our hearts, but sometimes the face value sounds so good that our conscious mind may say, it is a pity we didn't get that. But is it really?
I believe the universe always has your back. So if it is not for you, then it is because the universe has another plan, a better one or you.
It can also be the case of "not now, maybe later". There may be a lesson for you to learn, a skill to master, an area to grow. But until then, it will not be the best for you to handle what is that you actually want. You are not yet ready to reap the full benefits. I can attest to this wholeheartedly. I know for sure if I have met my husband earlier in my life, it would not have happened. I wasn't as mature to recognise his qualities, and I don't think I would have been a suitable partner for him. In any case, trust the universe and be more open about other possibilities. When we are not fixated on a particular outcome, we will realise we can actually get more than we bargained for!
How you react or response is always your choice
Now let's say our negative emotions are triggered by someone who disappointed or angered us in some ways.
Sometimes we let the emotions get the better of us, and we reacted immediately and not necessarily appropriate. We may feel we absolutely need to say something or send that email or SMS right the way. With today's technology and power of social media, we can do that in an instant. But later on, we may regret what we said, or realise we misinterpreted it, or overreacted because we were triggered by something else.
That is called the lack of impulse control. Partly it is about not having a regular zen or mindfulness practice. If we meditate in the morning, even for 5 mins, we set ourselves up for a calmer and clear mind. Or if we just breathe properly instead of running around multi-tasking, that will help too.
There are times that we need to respond, as there is something to say or to act accordingly.
In this week's podcast, you will find my personal updates (my eating adventures in China) and my interview about true empowerment with Ashlee Noonan from Perfect Potion. I am super excited and honoured to be speaking at their special event for The International Women's Day 2019. If you in the Brisbane area, come and check out the Masterclasses: Aromatherapy and Feminine Spirit on the 9th of March. I will be taking a group of woman on a mystical and archetypal journey to talk about Heroine Journeys and how to navigator them with tools and tips. Jennifer Jeffries will be leading the Aromatherapy masterclass that day.
You can listen to the podcast here or find it via most podcast catchers. Please subscribe to my podcast to get notificed about the next show!
So this week's blog on Empowerement:
You may have heard of a saying that goes "When a student is ready, a teacher will appear". Many years ago when I was going through some deep and reflective time, I heard a lecture by Marianne Williamson on A Course in Miracles (ACIM). Before long, I bought the book, and also I read many of her books such as A Return to Love, which is in Williamson's own words "like a cliff notes of A Course in Miracles". To this day, I still do the workbook exercises of ACIM, listen to her lectures and courses. For me, she is a truly empowered woman, not only because she is a best-selling author and lectured all over the world for 35 years. She is now running for the presidential candidacy for 2020. The main message of her campaign is clear, she believes that a moral and spiritual awakening is required to have deeper and meaningful conversations for this very critical time. Now, set aside any political views you may have, the fact she is running is already an act of courage.
She is a spiritual teacher, not a typical politician, everyone knows that. There are people who would likely to criticize and ridicule her, almost to be expected. In her own words, she is 66 years old, a grown woman who is in a stage of her life that doesn't need that kind of scrutiny, but she is doing this for a reason. She thinks she can help and it matters to her to do the right thing, even if it is difficult.
That is courage right then and there. If it is easy or comfortable, with no risks or nothing at stake, no courage is required. To do something that is scary and despite all can be lost (money, reputation, career, etc.), she still jumps into that, and it shows me only a truly empowered woman will do that. To take that leap of faith and fly high.
Those who are willing to be vulnerable, to face uncertainty and to take hard decisions or conversations, are those who are willing to be empowered and they are able to do it again and again.
There are many among us who are examples empowered men and women, just look around in your family, most likely not, there is someone who manage great odds and "made it", despite all challenges or disapprovals.
To be empowered is also about believing in yourself, the difference you can make to those around you and in the world. Everyone matters, I believe we are all born for greatness, each having a unique contribution to make. in ACIM, it talks about how when a problem occurs, the universe has already found a solution, God has sent you. Sometimes we think so little of ourselves when in fact we can do or undo great things, and then on other occasions, we think so highly of ourselves, when in fact in our ego mind is only creating a storm in a teacup, nothing more than that. The difference is, when we think of thoughts of love, we can be powerful beyond measure because we will do the right thing for one and another. But when we are taken by fear, our concerns are only about ourselves, we shrink. No matter how hard one tries, it would never feel adequate or satisfied.
So who would you rather be?
The one who thinks and acts from the basis of love, or hostage to our ego and controlled by fear?
I interviewed my dear friend and colleague, Deborah Shepherd, about her many soul adventures in life. In 2011, she left behind a big corporate career to become a purpose-driven and spiritual entrepreneur and business leader. She founded the Embrace Life Festivals and ran it across NSW Australia for about 6 years. She nurtured and mentored a community of health & wellness practitioners and created a movement called the Gratitude. She is now planning to launch Soul Advisors in Australia, a global non-profit organization with its founder. She is certainly a busy woman who embraced change and achieved a lot of success in her life. We talked about the ups and downs in navigating these soul adventures, what are the lessons learned and how can we best prepared for and manage these changes and challenges in our lives.
Here is the shownote:
The leap from working in the corporate world to become a purpose-driven entrepreneur
The good days, the bad days and lessons learned
If you are not sure, meditate!
Everything happened for a reason, all experiences lead you to personal growth
The Art of Letting-Go
How to become more resilient and evolve
What would you say to your younger self, a 20-year-old Deborah Shepherd
You can watch our interview here:
https://youtu.be/DKPnULk43T0
Subscribe to my YouTube channel if you would like to see more inspiring interviews! You can also listen to this interview as a podcast on iTunes or most podcast catchers. Just search for CoachSzeWing to download the show!
You can find out more about Soul Advisors here at https://www.souladvisor.com/
The following is the transcript of our interview:
Sze Wing: Hi! I'm super excited to talk to Deb today. Deb is my personal friend and we work on many projects before in the wellness industry and so today I'm really happy to be able to find the time together to have this interview and chat about one of my favourite topic, which is about authentic success, how do we embrace change and living a more inspired life which is a recurring theme on all my podcasts.
Sze Wing: So this is the podcast called #ConversationsThatMatter and we're talking about stories from women that aim to empower other women. So today we have Deborah Shepherd with us who had been in so many different international corporate projects and worked in the finance industry and she had about 30 years of it and then you changed and you started your own business as a purpose-driven entrepreneur.
And we're going to talk a little bit more about that. And she created the community called Gratitude and she delivered Embrace Life Festivals across New South Wales. She also has an online platform and now also doing consulting and mentoring. So she has obviously a few reincarnations of her career.
And now you're leading a project called Soul Advisors. So I guess for my listeners will be interested to hear firsthand from the woman who has embraced so many different ventures in the business world.
So our guest today is Deborah Shepherd. Welcome, Deb!
Deb: Thank you Sze Wing. Lovely to catch up with you as you say we've been connected with each other for many many years. So. I look forward to being here today.
Yeah. You know I often feel this is like a conversation you know imagine sitting in a cafe and then we have our girlfriends and some I had never met that before and then you know that they all inspired to do something more in their life and then I often feel that I'm always a middle person to introduce them and you are too and I felt this is almost like one of those occasions.
Deb: I think it's a combination of all sorts of things that you've just been saying. I think from memory because it is now quite a while since I left in 2011. But it would have been stirring for at least three or four years of me feeling that I had more to give to the world and something within me that needed to be expressed. Like a lot of people.
We all go through transitions. It is inevitable and they are meant to be soul-enriching. But there are times that it doesn’t feel that way. In this blog, I offer a few suggestions to help women to navigate and go through their transitions.