Both On Board - SoundSage

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Your whole life you’ve been taught the importance of having goals. Financial goals, relationship goals, employment goals. But have you ever experienced the feeling of achieving your goals… only to find yourself with an empty feeling? Somehow, the accomplishment wasn’t as fulfilling as you expected it to be.

In this episode, Ray and Christy discuss how to experience fulfillment before you achieve your goals, why you are preventing yourself from feeling joy, and a simple method for controlling your emotions when you are angry or stressed out.

Show Highlights Include:

The “relax and release” method for regaining control of your emotional response (2:43)
The valuable lesson that your day-to-day stresses and inconveniences teach you (4:40)
A key question to ask yourself when you begin to get irritated with someone else (5:42)
How you prevent yourself from experiencing peace, love, and joy (10:18)
The secret to enduring all your pain and struggle well (12:38)
The truth about why achieving goals leaves you empty (13:56)
Why striving for something only pushes it farther away from you (17:27)
Doing this is preventing you from moving forward to improve your life (32:46)

Ready to co-create the perfect life with your partner? Head over to http://bothonboard.com/ to get your free special report on “7 Game-changers for Highly Effective Entrepreneurial Couples” and level up your life, business, and relationship.

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The current situation in the world seems as though it is causing stress and emotional difficulty for a lot of people. However, things may not be as simple as they appear. If you’re feeling overwhelmed by things going on around you, there is good news.

You can control how you respond to stressful situations.

In this episode, Ray and Christy discuss how you are preventing yourself from experiencing happiness, why challenging circumstances aren’t the cause of your emotional distress, and several little-known benefits of meditation.

Show Highlights Include:

Doing this is destroying any potential you have for happiness (8:54)
The two ways you can choose to respond when the world challenges you (8:35)
This is what keeps you from enjoying your life all the time (13:13)
Why your current situation is actually NOT what’s causing your emotional distress (14:03)
The truth about why your partners see things differently than you (21:10)
This little-known meditation benefit can change your life (21:46)
Having this response to difficult experiences is the most damaging thing you can do to yourself (27:26)

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The current economic situation is turning the real estate market completely upside down. In case you don’t recognize it, we’ve never seen anything like this before. This is going to be very bad for a lot of people, but it doesn’t have to be bad for YOU.

In this episode, Ray gives his best tips for adjusting your mindset to the current situation, what you should really be paying attention to in the news, and the absolute best real estate moves you can make right now.

Show Highlights Include:

The winner’s mindset you must have to make smart moves when the market is tanking (5:23)
This is the single most important thing you can do with your time right now (7:01)
Why taking a loss on a property might be the smartest move (16:16)
If you’re still making decisions based on this, you may as well start looking for a job now (19:42)
This should be your top priority right now if you want to get back into business after the current crisis is over (30:50)
This skill is essential to taking advantage of the market TODAY (33:48)
Why forgivable loans will not solve your business problems and what to focus on instead (37:23)
This GO-TO strategy is the only one you should be using for deals at the moment (46:09)
These investments are the only ones that will profit in the current climate (60:00)

Be sure to check out the video version of this interview!

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It’s easy to get caught up in the bad news that seems to get worse and worse every day. So how can you stay a part of the world without letting the negativity drag you down? One way is to consider what the universe is trying to tell you through all this.

In this episode, Ray and Christy are joined by Candice Rasa, and they discuss why all this bad news is actually a good sign, how to care for yourself during times of intense stress, and how to position yourself for huge success when we get through this difficult time.

Show Highlights Include:

Why world events that seem like disasters are actually a good sign (2:10)
How embracing the “new normal” will make you more successful no matter what happens next (4:41)
Why fluidity and flow are the most important concepts for you to grasp right now (6:30)
The secret to unlocking the growth that these emotions are leading you to (7:25)
How to optimize your body’s systems for peak performance (9:15)
This is one of your most powerful attributes for reshaping your life (12:27)
Why failing governments, healthcare systems, and more shouldn’t worry you (13:22)
The incredibly powerful question to ask yourself… that just might change the world (14:57)

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What do you worry about most? Fear, stress, and material concerns affect many people. So how do you overcome these fears to lead a happier and more fulfilling life? One tool that can be extremely helpful is the Akashic Record.

In this episode, Ray and Christy are joined by spiritual coach Candace Rossa, and they discuss how to grow in your spiritual life, the habits that are keeping you stuck where you are, and how to relate to those around you who are stuck in lower spiritual dimensions.

Show Highlights Include:

What the Akashic Record is and how it directly impacts your life (2:27)
The dimension you currently exist in and where you ultimately want to be (4:03)
How to align this spiritual reality with your current religious beliefs, even if they seem incompatible (8:56)
Doing this is preventing you from reaching your spiritual AND material goals (12:50)
How to transition to a more holistic view of your life (13:45)
This energy is the most difficult to work with and is holding you back from the life you desire (14:11)
The secret to embracing greater spirituality when you feel stuck (19:15)

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In light of widespread panic over recent events, many people are looking for answers on how to deal with difficult times. Fortunately, there are a number of ways you can bring light to the world in a dark time, and they begin with shifting your mindset on what reality truly is.

In this episode, Ray and Dr Kirby Hotchner discuss the importance of vision, why forgiveness is essential, and spiritual practices to help calm and refocus your mind.

Show Highlights Include:

The life-changing difference between vision and sight (1:32)
Why everything you’ve been taught about loss and gain is a lie (2:50)
The most important act you can commit for yourself and others (5:56)
This powerful transformation can only come through forgiveness (8:27)
Why loving your neighbor is essential to your own well-being (9:15)
The easy way to begin a meditation practice, even if you’ve failed in the past (12:39)
How to use the “one monkey effect” to change the world (15:15)
Why science and spirituality must be connected to function properly (18:20)
How to surrender to God without abandoning your responsibilities (21:23)

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It is easy to get wrapped up in the emotions of other people when it seems as though the entire world has descended into panic and chaos. But it doesn’t have to be that way. What should you do when everyone around you has given in to fear?

In this episode, Ray and Dr. Kirby Hotchner discuss the best way to gain perspective in times of panic, individual practices that can help center you, and how to come out of difficult times stronger and more balanced.

Show Highlights Include:

This is the #1 skill to develop for a happy and fulfilled life (2:44)
The surprising source of all the fear in the world (4:12)
Why the current stressful situation can actually benefit anyone who takes this approach (7:00)
There is no power outside of this one source (8:34)
The one daily practice that can help you eradicate fear from your life (9:10)
The one powerful thing you must realize about fear that can free you (16:49)
Doing this only prolongs the suffering that you experience in a negative situation (19:43)

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If you’ve ever experienced a lack of money, or recognized that your relationship with money was always based in fear or lack, listen up. Whether you realize it or not, your internal thoughts and feelings about money can affect external wealth.

In this episode, Ray and Christy discuss why money along can’t make you happy, how to increase your internal feeling of abundance, and how to crush your limiting beliefs to experience your own wealth breakthrough.

Show Highlights Include:

Why chasing money ultimately leaves you wealthy but unfulfilled (7:27)
This uncommon definition will help you keep money in proper perspective (7:51)
This single word is the key to unlocking all the abundance you ever desired (9:14)
If you constantly feel like there’s never enough money, this perspective shift will get you back on track (12:27)
If you rely on this one thing for security, you’ll always feel vulnerable (14:22)
You must address this specific shortcoming in order to attain true, abundant wealth (16:27)
Feelings of abundance must begin here or you’ll always experience lack (22:25)

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How do you define prosperity? Many of us have related prosperity directly to money, and how much of it we have (or don’t have). But when you get right down to it, there’s more to living a prosperous life than money.

In this episode, Ray and Christy discuss the real meaning of prosperity, and how you can lead a prosperous life regardless of your financial situation. Plus you'll see how to focus your mind and spirit on financial success

Show Highlights Include:

Why money is not the root of prosperity and what you should be focusing on instead (6:28)
How the current use of the word prosperity has changed from the “old English” definition, and why this could be ruining your life (10:08)
Chasing this form of prosperity will leave you empty, and perpetually unfulfilled (11:56)
Take this approach to set yourself up for prosperity in both your finances and your soul (14:11)
You must eliminate these prosperity killers from your life in order to achieve your dreams (15:00)
The not-so-subtle way awareness influences prosperity and how to achieve it (21:03)

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It seems that the whole world is in a state of panic. Right now it’s over the Corona Virus, but this isn’t the first time something like this has happened, and it certainly won’t be the last.

It’s so easy to get swept up in the storm of negative news reports, doom and gloom social media posts, and the panic of empty store shelves. But it doesn’t have to be this way. In this episode, Ray and Christy discuss how to center yourself and keep the proper perspective when it seems that the rest of the world is losing its mind.

Show Highlights Include:

This is the secret to maintaining your zen, even when things are falling apart all around you (10:30)
To turn a bad situation around, ask yourself this one important question (13:08)
The real reason getting prepared when things are going well is the key to your survival (14:11)
Take these steps now and you’ll be strong enough to face whatever the future holds (15:15)
Do this work on yourself and the hard times will create growth instead of destruction (21:25)
Defuse any citation by asking yourself this surprisingly powerful question (24:35)

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Working well with your spouse can often be enough of a challenge, but what happens when you try to offer them advice as well? Have you ever been in a situation where your partner resented the coaching that you tried to give them? There’s a good chance that it’s because you made some small but significant mistakes in your approach.

In this episode, Ray and Christy go over the tactics and techniques that will help you be more effective when trying to coach your spouse or significant other, while still maintaining your relationship.

Show Highlights Include:

Why the small difference between being a good coach and a great coach can save your marriage from disaster (8:55)
Avoid marital catastrophe by not attempting to coach your spouse in these specific areas (10:14)
Before you lash out, ask yourself this question when you begin to get frustrated at your partner’s decisions (15:40)
The subtle way you strangle your spouse’s potential even though you think you’re helping (17:58)
This simple question will help you reveal the right time to take that next step you’ve been considering (19:37)
To be a good coach to your partner, avoiding this one relationship-killing mistake is crucial (29:21)

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Have you ever been in a situation where someone else “triggered” you? It probably left you feeling angry or frustrated for the rest of the day. The problem with that is, when it happens, it winds up stealing all your time and energy from more productive tasks.

In this episode, Ray and Christy dive deep into what causes you to be triggered, questions to help refocus your emotions and the best ways to overcome that anger.

Show Highlights Include:

The surprising way that triggering events are actually the best thing that could happen to you (4:46)
Make this one quick mindset shift when you are angry, and you’ll never be frustrated with other people ever again (5:58)
Why being quick to label situations as “wrong” is keeping you from reaching your full potential (10:05)
How the judgments you make about other people reveal your own shortcomings and insecurities (15:18)
When someone sends you into a blind rage, defuse the situation by asking this one simple question (15:54)
The astonishing reason you can’t stop projecting your emotions on to other people, and how to break the cycle (17:43)
5 steps you can take to show compassion to others and stop living your life in fear (28:40)

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When two people come together for anything, be it a relationship or a business, things can get complicated. You have different personalities, different ideas, and different opinions. If you’ve ever felt out of sync with your partner, you know how bad things can get as a result.

In this episode, Ray and Christy discuss what it means to be “Both on Board.” They talk about why the differences you and your partner have can actually make you stronger, the first step you MUST take to get your partner on board, and more...

Show Highlights Include:

The #1 way you can be “on board” with your spouse in your life and business, and put a stop to the tension and fighting (6:14)
The secret to challenging your partner to make sure you are not being left behind or steamrolled (9:45)
The commonly overlooked way disagreement can help prevent future disasters from occurring (10:50)
How to break free of the cycle of problems looping in your head and stop wasting time and money (14:21)
Why discussing difficult things can help you push through your lowest moments together (17:02)
The almost magical technique for getting your spouse on board with you, even when they think you’re dead wrong (21:07)

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Have you ever felt like you would be far more successful in your business (and personal) life if your spouse just supported you more? If they understood you better?

Chances are, you’re making some critical mistakes in the way you are trying to involve them. In this episode, Ray and Christy are interviewed by Tim Bratz and go into the best ways to reassure a skeptical spouse, ease your partner into your business and more.

Show Highlights Include:

How to broaden the entrepreneurial mindset of a worrying spouse to reduce conflict and get unstuck (11:43)
Is your spouse skeptical of your entrepreneurial adventures? Instead of trying to change them, do this instead and end the fighting (12:07)
If you’re feeling disconnected from your spouse, you can do this activity together to bridge the gap and become close again (14:34)
Do you need to “burn the ships?” Here’s one way to find out (16:08)
The secret to building a successful entrepreneurial partnership with your significant other (22:03)
The absolute WORST thing you can do when trying to get your partner involved in your business (23:50)
This productivity technique could be the secret to a smoothly running business… and relationship (31:20)

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If you’re like most of us, you’ve probably found yourself stuck in a situation where it seemed like everything you did was for someone else, yet you still felt bad. No matter how hard you tried to take care of your spouse and your kids, things still weren’t working.

In this episode, Ray and Christy take a deep dive into how to be selfish (the right way), how to avoid the devastating results of comparison and how to take care of yourself without neglecting the other parts of your life.

Show Highlights Include:

How to release the overwhelming feelings of guilt that go along with putting yourself first, and why it is essential for those who rely on you (4:45)
Why taking care of external needs leaves you feeling empty and how to make yourself feel whole again (12:53)
The 2 essential steps you must take when you start comparing yourself to others to reclaim your own identity (18:22)
How the “unsubscribe” approach can help you crush anxiety and focus only on the things that bring you peace of mind (21:00)
Why trying to be the “good mom” is actually making you a worse parent… and person (23:24)
The simple method for getting anything you want in life, without taking advantage of your partner (31:53)

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Do you ever find yourself frustrated or feeling like you’re out of control of your situation? No matter what the circumstances, how you respond to them can make all the difference.

In this episode, Ray and Christy discuss the difference between reacting and responding to a situation, as well as techniques for handling difficult people, rebounding from bad decisions, and more.

Show Highlights Include:

How knowing the difference between responding and reacting can lift you from failure to success (2:07)
Changing this one element of any situation will make you a better entrepreneur, spouse, and parent (6:20)
Try this to bounce back quickly from bad choices that leave you angry with yourself (10:30)
Take this game-changing approach to any outcome and end frustration for good (16:28)
You can focus on this one simple thing to improve every interaction you have with another person (18:03)
The mindset shift that helps you avoid a downward spiral in triggering situations (27:07)
Stop using these two words right now to immediately begin repairing broken relationships (36:25)

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If you’ve ever felt frustrated trying to run a business with your spouse or partner, this episode is for you. Differences in mindset, goals, or financial priorities are just a few of the many hurdles that must be overcome when working together.

In this episode, featuring Corey and Shelley Peterson, Ray and Christy dive deep into these issues and many more, providing advice and solutions for creating a stronger business and relationship.

Show Highlights Include:

The first and most important mindset shift you must make when beginning your entrepreneurial journey (5:00)
The secret to working together successfully as a couple (6:30)
How to combine your strengths with your partner’s strengths to exponentially multiply your results (16:11)
Is it possible to balance two “alpha” personalities in a partnership? It is if you do this (19:37)
The importance of knowing when to turn off the business side of your relationship (23:51)
The counterintuitive method to stop failing to meet your goals (27:56)
How to share difficult things with your partner without hurting their feelings (43:20)

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If you’ve ever been faced with a major life decision, you know how tough it can be to be certain you’re doing the right thing. And when you add another person (or people) to the mix it becomes even more challenging.

In this episode, Ray and Christy share their methods for working together as partners in making major decisions, how to know when your ego is trying to take over, and opening yourself up to signs from the universe.

Show Highlights Include:

How to determine what is a coincidence and what is a sign from the universe (13:29)
This simple test reveals whether your desire for change is coming from your heart or your ego (14:57)
The mind-blowingly obvious way you can tell if a decision is right for you (19:58)
Stop asking if you “need” to make a change and ask yourself this question instead (22:46)
What “flaming rings” can tell you about your decisions… if you pay attention (26:19)

Ready to co-create the perfect life with your partner? Head over to our website http://bothonboard.com/ to get your free special report on “7 Game-changers for Highly Effective Entrepreneurial Couples” and level up your life, business, and relationship.

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Struggling with the swings between emotional highs and lows? Feel like it’s impossible to balance responsibilities with your family and in your business?

In today’s episode, Ray and Christy discuss Lifeonaire, an impactful and highly-recommended book, and share some advice on discussing big decisions with your partner, how to find the stable middle ground in difficult emotional times and much more…

Show Highlights Include:

How to overcome the limiting beliefs that are keeping you stuck (14:53)
To-do list causing a feeling of dread in the pit of your stomach? Try this list instead to change it to joy (18:12)
The surprising link between your energy and your experiences (22:33)
This one thing will create more growth and progress in your life than anything else (26:40)
The life-changing magic of being selfish with your time(28:17)
How to repair the emotional wreckage caused by “fickleness” (32:34)
The misunderstood power of slowing down to get more done (38:30)

Ready to co-create the perfect life with your partner? Head over to our website to get your free special report on “7 Game-changers for Highly Effective Entrepreneurial Couples” and level up your life, business, and relationship.

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You need to give up control to allow co-creation to happen. Are you trying to force things to happen? Struggling to remain in control at all times and feeling like everything is continually out of grasp? We can actually control very little in our lives and that’s why we need to learn to let go. This episode of Both on Board is all about giving up control, meeting God halfway, and allowing things to happen.

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:45] Creating vs. making things happen * [3:10] Control something vs. allowing * [7:45] Control leaves no room for joy * [9:00] Always return to a place of joy * [16:20] How do you identify where you’re at? * [18:15] Learn to operate out of discernment * [22:20] What are you attracting, choosing, and creating?

You need to align instead of grind If you’re going out and grinding day-in and day-out and trying to will things into existence, you’re operating out of fear. You need to learn to see when you’re forcing things to happen instead of aligning with what is supposed to. The old adage is God’s delays are not God’s denials.

But honestly, sometimes God’s delays ARE his denials.

If you’re trying to force into existence something that isn’t meant to be, maybe God IS saying this isn’t for you. As entrepreneurs, we want to control everything. But the truth is we can only control how we react, and the decisions we make.

Giving up control leaves room for joy Operating out of a place of controlling everything means you’re operating out of fear. Out of scarcity. When I was pregnant, I tried to control every little thing. I read books, I did research, I tried to manage everything I ate and did. I found myself constantly frustrated and was driving myself absolutely crazy. It was honestly hard on us both.

I couldn’t control the pregnancy or how things would go. I was struggling and suffering. As Ray likes to put it, I had to shut-up and allow room for grace. I needed to start to focus on what felt good for me, not on what I think I needed to do. The better you feel, the better you show up—and I needed to show up for my baby.

So I signed up for a course to teach Yoga. I did something that would bring me joy and started the process of beginning to let go. I wasn’t going to let my desire to control everything steal my joy.

Set up “control” checkpoints So how do you begin to operate in a place of joy, instead of out of fear? We like to start the day off on a high—meditate, do yoga, etc. Do whatever it is that centers you and starts from a place of gratefulness. Then, you set up checkpoints for yourself throughout the day to reflect on your actions and reactions.

Are you acting from a place of stress?

Are you making excuses?

Are you allowing external circumstances dictate how you feel?

If you take a few moments a day to realign yourself you gain perspective. Perspective allows you to align with the co-creator and take aligned action. Do your part. Give 100% of what you have and allow the creator to meet you. Don’t force or dictate what you want to happen.

Learn to operate from a place of discernment Giving up control doesn’t mean you make decisions hastily. But we believe you need to lead with your heart first, then your head. Your head is analytical and leads from a place of fear. Lead with your heart. Check-in with your “gut” feeling. Why do you feel the way you feel? Where is the feeling coming from?

Address how you feel, talk about it, confront it, and then make decisions. Find the truth.

Co-creating with each other, with God, and with the universe means making a plan—but don’t become attached to the outcome. Be humble and ask for help when necessary. But remember you don’t have to do it all. That’s not how things were meant to be.

Listen to the whole episode of Both on Board for our full thoughts on co-creation, giving up control, and living in a place of peace, love, joy, and abundance.

Happy New Year!

Resources & People Mentioned * The Way of Mastery by the Shanti Christo Foundation * Money and the Law of Attraction by Esther and Jerry Hicks

Connect With Ramon and Christy * Schedule a meeting with us now! * www.BothOnBoard.com * Both On Board on Instagram: @BothOnBoard * Ray’s Instagram - @OfficialRamonGonzalez * Christy’s Instagram - @ChristyRisco * Facebook - Ramon Gonzalez * Facebook - Christy Risco

Subscribe to Both on Boardon Apple Podcasts, TuneIn, RadioPublic, Google Podcasts, Spotify

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The power of two is inextricably more powerful than what someone can do alone. Having a partner in life and business makes life itself more fulfilling and fun. But how do you know you’re choosing the right friends? The right spouse or business partner? In this episode of Both on Board, Ray and I talk about some of the criteria we use to choose the people we surround ourselves with.

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:50] The Power of Two * [6:15] How do you choose the right people? * [12:50] Do they act with integrity? * [16:05] Give relationships time to develop * [23:10] What does a good partnership look and feel like? * [28:55] Choosing a partner is an art * [33:50] Be strategic with relationships * [38:10] Couples Cruise coming!

It begins with value alignment One of the key things we look at when building relationships with potential friends, business partners, etc. is their value system. For the relationship to work in the long run, we need to align on core values and beliefs.

Do they show genuine care for others?

Do they give to charities?

Do they have a commitment to personal growth?

You can’t force someone to meet your values. It’s okay if they’re different. They don’t have to be mirror images of you—you want diversity. But you want to know they are people of integrity, who do what they say they will.

The power of two begins with YOU I rely heavily on my intuition, or “gut feeling”. I’m good at listening and reading body language, whereas Ray is a “love at first sight” kind of guy. Ray instantly vibes with people and thinks they’re amazing. I take time to feel them out. I note if I have synergy with them or not.

If it doesn’t feel good or it doesn’t feel easy it’s probably not the right thing to do.

We are on opposite ends of the spectrum when it comes to feeling people out. Ray and I balance each other out. I help him be more cautious, and he pushes me to be more open.

We leverage the power of two.

It takes time to build relationships Along with core value alignment and intuition, you need to factor in time. Is the other person’s behavior in alignment with what they say? Relationships/partnerships/friendships don’t get tested until stress is added. As Ray likes to say, how do they act when they get punched in the face?

Don’t get attached to their personality until you know who they are. Sometimes your initial perception is not the reality. People deal with daily stressors and things that impact them—they aren’t always going to put their best face forward.

It also depends on how you are showing up. If you aren’t showing up authentically, how can they expect you to? If you are clear on who you are and how you feel about yourself, you’ll attract the same kind of people.

What does a good partnership look like? Ray and I are the first to admit that the right person makes all the difference. As you look at your core values, listen to your intuition, and give the relationship time it comes down to who do you want to be on board with?

You don’t have to be the same, but you have to be on board with each other. A good partnership is about finding a way for both of you to show up authentically as your best selves and create magic. Your differences should melt away as you work in alignment.

Other than personal development, the best way to invest your time is in relationships. You want to be strategic in your decisions and invest in partnerships where you give value to each other. When you choose wisely, the power of two will be more evident and fruitful.

To hear how some of our best relationships and partnerships started, how we help balance each other out, and more—listen to the whole episode!

Resources & People Mentioned * The Power of Two * Principles by Ray Dalio * The Way of Mastery by the Shanti Christo foundation

Subscribe to Both on Boardon Apple Podcasts, TuneIn, RadioPublic, Google Podcasts, Spotify

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Are you waiting for January 1st, 2020 to commit to change in your life? Are you sitting there telling yourself rational lies? What if—instead of waiting—you committed to small changes now? Focus on what you want to BE, what you want to DO, and what you want to HAVE. In this episode of Both on Board, we talk about how we have committed to daily rituals and how it’s changed us—and can change you, too.

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:45] How we’re preparing for 2020 * [3:35] What are the things I want to BE/DO/HAVE? * [8:00] Do you have gray areas in your life? * [13:10] What daily ritual can you implement? * [19:30] Show up with a different energy * [21:40] Cultivate awareness of where your time is spent * [25:50] Celebrate every little win * [29:20] What are your “big rocks”? * [40:20] Don’t let your willpower wane * [43:15] What’s coming up for Both on Board

Do you have gray areas in your life? We all have something we want to commit to and improve, right? People seem to expect that when the new year comes around they will magically be able to commit to resolutions they couldn’t keep the entire previous year.

You have the power to take responsibility for your choices. You need to get to a place where you have a strong foundation to build off of.

Are there gray areas that you’re avoiding?

It’s time to shine a light on the areas that are in the gray. Are you living in alignment with where your soul knows it should be? You need to move out of the gray areas and back to joy.

What daily ritual can you implement? Start working on those gray areas now by implementing a small daily ritual that you can learn to keep consistently. It takes approximately 68 days for something to become a habit. Start small, such as working out once a day. Get up early, make your bed, or drink more water. Start early in the morning because your willpower wanes throughout the day.

As you start to successfully continue that habit, you build success on success.

If you’re struggling, find a way to get your spouse on board. Fill them in on your goals and allow them to keep you accountable. Maybe your spouse will dive in with you! After all, you’ll do more for someone else than you’ll do for yourself. Work hard to find a middle ground of accountability and support.

There is power in commitment. Grant Cardone says “Commit first and figure the rest out later”. Are you ready to commit to implementing one small change?

What are the ‘big rocks’ you will schedule around? Are you aware of what happens every day? Do you know where your time is going? How much time are you wasting? When we were doing 75Hard, we cultivated an awareness of where our time was being spent and learned something valuable: You will always have time for the things you prioritize.

Are your goals important enough that you’re prioritizing them daily? Your non-negotiables should be your core commitments that you schedule first—the rocks. Things that you want to do are the tiny pebbles or sand that are filtered in and fit around the rocks.

When you’re saying you don’t have time for something important, you’re prioritizing something that’s not. What 3-5 things are your priorities? Take some time to think through what those are, and schedule them into your next week. Let everything else filter around them, and you’ll be amazed.

Commit to change NOW What is taking up mental space and energy? What is robbing your peace? It is there for you to address it. Stop making things more difficult than they need to be. Show up as the person you want to be now. Not next week, not in 2020, but now. The more responsibility you take, the more power you get back. And there is power in commitment.

Where can you challenge yourself with starting today?

Resources & People Mentioned * The Way of Mastery by the Shanti Christo foundation * The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey * Chris and Heidi Powell with Ed Mylett

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Entrepreneurship development in marriage is possible when you’re both aligned and passionate about what you do. Are there struggles to overcome? Of course! But if you’re both on board, then you can work through the challenges and come out stronger. Ray and I love connecting with other married entrepreneurs and couples working together. In this episode of Both on Board, Ray and I were interviewed on the Multi-FAMILY Zone podcast, hosted by Julia and Gino Barbaro.

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:45] The Multi-FAMILY Zone podcast * [2:30] We finished 75Hard! * [3:55] Why did Ray choose Real Estate? * [5:35] Christy’s Journey * [8:30] Moving away from limiting beliefs * [12:15] How Ray and Christy work together * [17:45] How marriage grows and changes * [22:45] How did having a child change everything? * [26:20] Ongoing goals for the business * [29:20] Tips for working together as a couple * [38:00] Connect with us

The 3 Laws of Ray We share a little bit of our personal journeys in this podcast. Part of Ray’s story is that he’s constantly reinventing himself, trying to find the path that is his right fit. I prefer to refer to it as ‘agility’. He has this unique ability to transition into something bigger and better seamlessly. Gino coined the “3 Laws of Ray”:

Desperation: Ray was motivated because he was desperate for change, desperate for something more. He didn’t feel fulfilled at General Electric. It often is a strong motivator for people to make a change
Inspiration: He found inspiration and dove into real estate. What is your inspiration for your business and future?
Perspiration: Building a business and being an entrepreneur isn't easy. It takes hard work and perspiration! Do you have what it takes?

Keep listening along to hear some insight from my journey from being a school-teacher to a full-time entrepreneur and mom!

How to overcome your limiting beliefs When I was a teacher, I did my best to always be happy. I chose to enjoy my days in my job—though often difficult—and spent them smiling. My coworkers gave me the name “Sunshine”. But what I found is that other teachers found my happiness to be annoying, as if I shouldn’t be happy in my circumstances.

Many teachers weren’t happy. But their limiting beliefs held power over them:

“You just gotta suck it up and deal with it”.

“It’s worth it because I have the summers off”.

“I get to leave at 3 pm every day”.

I’m of the mindset that if you’re going to teach, you need to be happy doing it. If you don’t want to teach, overcome the limiting beliefs that are keeping you trapped and find something better. If you don’t enjoy it, are you truly making an impact?

Tried and true strategies for couples working together Our first and foremost tool that we reiterate time and time again is investing in personal development. We can’t know each other and how we mesh together if we don’t know ourselves first! Find out what you’re good at (and what you’re not) and learn to play off of each other’s strengths.

Another mindset that we stand by is taking responsibility for yourself and your actions. You are responsible for your life and everything in it, including how you respond. Don’t play the blame game, stop being the victim, and believe that life is happening for you and serves you. This allows you to show up to your relationship and business at a much higher level!

Lastly, support each other. Be in alignment with each other. Be compassionate. As Ray is learning the lending space, I am giving him the time and space he needs to grow in the new endeavor. But we are both enrolled in the vision and are each other’s biggest fan.

Burn the ships and dive in When I left my teaching job, I didn’t request a leave of absence—I turned in my resignation. There was no life preserver. Gino pointed out that I burned the ships, and dove head-first into the entrepreneurial world with Ray. It certainly wasn’t easy, and the learning process was hard on us.

Gino said it best when he said an entrepreneur is anyone who takes responsibility and someone who makes enough money to pay for their own mistakes. Through our marriage, the seasons of starting and ending businesses, and having our daughter we’ve hit bumps in the road.

But you have to take a leap of faith to get to something better. You work through the challenges, the arguments, disagreements, and move forward in an aligned vision. There is no looking back, only pushing forward to something better.

If you’re ready to take the leap and need some motivation, schedule a call with us by clicking our link below!

Resources & People Mentioned * Schedule a meeting with us now! * The Multi-FAMILY zone podcast * Summit Home Buyers, LLC * Tony Robbins Date with Destiny * DiSC Personality Test * Wealth Dynamics Test * Human Design Test

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“You can grow ideas in the garden of your mind” - Mr. Rogers

Mr. Rogers popularized the term “Garden of Your Mind” and this week it became real for us. There is this patch of weeds that have been growing at the front of our house and it’s bothered me for a while. I decided to stop ignoring it, and turn it into a garden. As I’ve gone through the process, a wonderful analogy has developed that we wanted to share with you. What are you growing in the garden of your mind? Are you letting weeds take over? What ideas are you cultivating? Ray and I discuss the concept in detail in this episode of Both on Board!

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:50] The garden of your mind * [2:25] What does your foundation look like? * [12:15] The four F’s: family, fitness, finances, and faith * [18:00] The process of “un-becoming” * [24:00] Don’t take the weeds for granted * [25:35] Cultivating the seeds of awareness * [32:10] The excuse of lack of time

Rebuild a stronger foundation to maximize success What does your foundation look like? Are there weeds growing? Is the soil nourished and ready to grow the seeds that you plant? Just as it is with gardening, your foundation for personal development needs to be cultivated. If your foundation is matted with weeds, there is no room for other plants to grow.

To become effective and efficient, you need to make room for growth by first pruning the weeds. Remove limiting beliefs, baggage from the past, and anything that is not serving you. If you ignore the weeds, any seed you plant will be choked out and diminished. A strong foundation is what ultimately leads to and maximizes your success.

What are the building blocks of your foundation? There are ‘Four F’s’ that you can focus on that are the foundation for your life: family, fitness, finances, and faith. We’ve been doing 75Hard to address our fitness. As we are focusing on that, our nutrition is falling into place. But it’s also allowing us to build discipline into our life that impacts everything else we do.

The better you take care of yourself, the better you show up, right?

Our finances are on point. We work hard to stay organized and on top of what we need to be doing. If you get your finances in order, people take notice. Our CPA is one of our investors for a deal we just completed because he sees how organized and responsible we are. He’s willing to invest because our foundation is strong and we are dependable.

What can you address in the four F’s that will strengthen your foundation?

The process of “un-becoming” “Maybe the journey isn’t so much about becoming anything. Maybe it’s about un-becoming everything that isn’t really you, so you can be who you were meant to be in the first place.”

― Paul Coelho

God made you in his image to be a creator. To be love and give love. Are their weeds growing in the garden of your mind that you need to remove in surrender? Are they masking your foundation and who you really are?

Let go of who you think you are—your limitations and fear—and learn to surrender. Let go of negative energy and stop taking things so seriously. It is so much easier to overcome obstacles when you learn to make the process fun. Keep listening as we talk about practical ways to do this!

Plant the seed of awareness Look at the weeds that have grown in your life and don’t take them for granted. Bring conscious awareness to your past, your struggles, your challenges. If you ignore the weeds, you run on auto-pilot and continue to allow fear, scarcity, lack, doubt, denial, and self-judgment rule your life. Once you allow awareness into your life, you can’t “unsee” it. You can’t return to what was.

Instead, you get to focus on cultivating what you have planted.

As you begin to build consistency and work on pulling the weeds in your life you cultivate success. That doesn’t mean weeds won’t still crop up, but you will have the awareness that they are showing up and can spot-treat. The more you build on the success the easier it gets, the more it’s part of your process, and the more fruitful you become.

What do you need to shine a light on? What behaviors do you need to bring into conscious awareness? We continue to talk about prioritizing your time, asking empowering questions, and much more. Don’t miss this episode!

Resources & People Mentioned * The Way of Mastery by the Shanti Christo Foundation * Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less by Greg McKeown * Andy Frisella’s 75Hard

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When you learn to accept responsibility for your actions it can be life-changing. We believe it’s important to cultivate an awareness of how you’re acting and reacting. All aspects of decision-making are in your control. Even how you react to situations out of your control is up to you. Are you ready to start owning everything you do? Listen to this episode of Both on Board as we dissect the way we think about our actions.

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:50] You’re responsible for everything in your life * [4:15] The power of responsibility * [9:25] Confront, acknowledge, and change your outlook * [13:45] What happens when you operate out of fear * [15:35] The importance of integrity * [21:50] Everyone needs accountability

You are perfectly free at all times: everything is your choice You get to assign meaning to everything that happens to you and through you. You need to take full responsibility for how you show up in your life. It’s so easy to say, but much harder to do. Did you spend a ton of money at Target? Are you looking at your credit card bill in disbelief?

Own the decision you made, pay your bill, and think about what you could have done differently next time.

What are you bringing to life with your thoughts? Are they bringing you life, or making you feel imprisoned? If you bring awareness to the moments and decisions that you’re making, you can change your perception—and maybe even change your reality.

Every situation is neutral and only you assign meaning Every situation that happens to you or for you is neutral. They are just events in time that happen—you get to choose what they mean. You get to decide what emotion to assign to the situation. Are you going to look at it in an empowering way? My mood or perception of the event is how I label it.

What emotion are you choosing to live in?

Negativity attracts negativity. What if we chose to live in abundance versus lack? Can you look at what appears to be a negative situation and believe you can figure it out? When we choose to confront the negative emotions and acknowledge how we feel we can make better decisions. When you assign meaning, you take back the power and can stop playing the victim.

The importance of integrity We believe that if you say you’re going to do something, that you should do it. If you make a mistake and aren’t true to your word, take responsibility and rectify your mistake. Ray recently had the opportunity to have a conversation with someone he cared about who wasn’t holding up to what they said they’d do.

The conversation was transformational because he came from a place of love and respect, while also communicating that the actions weren’t okay. Make sure you’re coming from a place of love and not judgment. When coming at it in that way, you can have deep conversations create a bond and closeness.

If the tables were flipped, and someone confronted you, how would you respond? Would you take responsibility for your actions and embody integrity?

When you accept responsibility it gives you power Ray and I are at the tail end of closing a deal on some rental property in Atlanta. I allowed myself to be completely stressed about the deal because I felt like I was in the dark. I let anxiety creep in, and because of it, I couldn’t sleep. I assigned meaning to the situation that didn’t exist and created unnecessary anxiety.

Ray confronted me about the situation and I had to take a step back and evaluate.

When I accepted responsibility for how I assigned meaning to the situation, it was a weight off my shoulders. I didn’t have to be in that state of mind.Taking responsibility allows you to diffuse whatever situation you’re in and gives you back your power.

How are you showing up in your life? Are you accepting responsibility for every action and response?

Resources & People Mentioned * The Way of Mastery by the Shanti Christo Foundation

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It’s important to support your partner through everything, especially when life brings unexpected (or expected) change. Are you walking separate paths towards the same goal? Or is a new business endeavor stealing more of your time then you’d hoped? Whatever the circumstances, are you there for each other? Change can be both wonderful and terrifying. In this episode of Both on Board, we talk about navigating change together.

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:45] How to support your partner * [4:30] Give yourself flexibility * [8:45] Change can lead to opportunity * [13:50] Desire drives impact * [20:45] What am I willing to give up? * [25:30] Leverage your unique abilities * [28:30] Invest in relationships * [34:45] What doors are being opened? * [36:25] What are your strengths? * [40:55] Face your fears * [43:30] align with the “5 F’s”

Navigating change requires flexibility and grace When Ray and I stopped wholesaling and flipping houses and dove into the loan business, it was a whirlwind of change. We were navigating something completely foreign and it took some time to adjust. Now, Ray is working on a deal that would involve acquiring a large multi-family property in Buckhead.

It’s taken significantly more time than we ever thought it would.

It’s new, exciting, and terrifying. We’ve had to practice giving ourselves grace. Ray is traveling and speaking to investors to raise capital. But we’ve taken the time to be proactive and prepare for this new season. After all, being an entrepreneur requires embracing changes and ups and downs. We know that this is happening—we chose it and we are going to navigate it.

Support your partner to reach your shared vision In this podcast, we’re always talking about our belief that life comes in seasons and that one prepares you for the next. We had a slow summer of self-care and focusing on our family. As we are ramping up into fall we are reminded that the season prepared us for the chaos that is coming. We know that with a willingness to leap into the unknown there will be growth. But there is one thing that we always consider when facing change:

Is it in alignment with our vision for our future?

You must compare proposed change against the framework you’ve created for yourself. If our desire for expansion aligns with our combined vision, we take the challenge head-on. You may have to give up some things that are no longer essential. Are the opportunities presented to you worth what you’ll need to give up? Only you get to decide.

Is the change we are embracing scary? Of course. But we have each other to lean on for support.

What are your unique abilities and strengths? Ray is 100% in his element when he’s networking and speaking. He understands risk and investments and knows exactly how to explain that to investors. I know what his unique abilities are and know that he’s doing what he’s meant to be doing in this season. I’ve been privileged to see him living a passion of his firsthand as he’s supporting me in mine.

Flow and alignment using your own unique abilities and talents creates magic.

You need to figure out what you’re great at and pivot as you go through life. My comfort zone has always been more of a supporting role but I’m growing and branching out. I started with a speaking opportunity and will continue to develop and grow my unique abilities.

Where do you place value? Every event we attend allows us to forge relationships that could last a lifetime. Some relationships are seasonal. But we desire to build friendships with people that we can pour into as they invest in us. Always remember—what doors are opening as you branch out and step into the unknown?

Are you vibrating at a frequency that attracts people on the same level as you are higher?

Are you investing in your personal growth?

Are you remembering to place your health and family first?

We share personal stories and so much more about support in this episode. Be sure to listen to the whole thing!

Resources & People Mentioned * Way of Mastery by the Shanti Christo Foundation * Tim Bratz * The 10X Rule by Grant Cardone

Connect With Ramon and Christy * www.BothOnBoard.com * Both On Board on Instagram: @BothOnBoard * Ray’s Instagram - @OfficialRamonGonzalez * Christy’s Instagram - @ChristyRisco * Facebook - Ramon Gonzalez * Facebook - Christy Risco

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What does financial freedom look like for you? Is it paying off debt? Does it allow you to travel the world? In a world where talking about finances is taboo, we are bringing the conversation front and center. Money is important. Money is needed. You should want more of it. We talk about the benefits of financial freedom and also touch on some concepts from the book “The 4-Hour Workweek” in this episode of Both on Board.

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:45] The topic of finances shouldn’t be taboo * [2:30] The goal is to be rich, not look rich * [6:00] What does being wealthy really mean? * [9:30] What does financial freedom look like for you? * [14:40] How to find fulfillment and happiness * [19:30] “The 4-hour Workweek” by Tim Ferriss * [27:00] Renting versus buying * [30:30] Inactivity is not the goal, doing what excites you is * [39:35] The entrepreneurial mindset: be an investor * [44:05] Cashflow first, big payday second

The goal is to be rich, not look rich I saw this statement on Instagram and it struck me. The goal is to be rich, not look rich. So many people prance around Miami, showing off their nice cars and expensive apparel—but in reality, they’re broke. In reality, we are just seeing their highlight reel. Are they just trying to put on a mask? Are they choosing retail therapy over facing inner demons?

In reality, the goal shouldn’t be to look rich.

The goal is to be rich. We don’t say this to sound snobbish, uppity, or whatever you want to label it. But guys—God didn’t make you to be broke. He created us to live in abundance, to provide for our families, and to find fulfillment. How about, instead of “fake it til you make it” we embrace “make it so you don’t have to fake it”.

“Money is not everything, not having it is” - Kanye West We are being completely open, honest, and blunt in this episode. You may claim that money isn’t everything, but you need it. Everyone lives a different journey and has a different mindset about money, and that’s okay. Get clarity on what it means to you and what financial freedom looks like.

Then embrace the fact that money is important.

Without money, you cannot have abundance. You can’t give from a place of want. You should have enough cash flow to sustain yourself and your family. You need money to give to others. Whether you like it or not, money is a critical tool in survival. 80% of US citizens live paycheck-to-paycheck. Is that really what you want for your life?

Financial freedom allows you to live a life of fulfillment Ray poignantly stated that we were willing to trade 5-10 years of our life—which most aren’t willing to do—so we could live a life that most can’t. We hustle and work hard for what we’ve earned, and it’s allowed us the financial freedom that we desired. It was never about the money, but growing into the life we want to live.

We can take our daughter to Disney World without hesitation.

We can move wherever we want, whenever we want.

We focus on experiences over material things.

We give to worthy causes.

Because those are the things we value. What gets us those things? Money. We desire to give Valentina magic moments. We don’t want to place our limiting beliefs on her by saying something is not possible. The reality is the world is full of possibilities—but you have to be willing to work hard for it.

Inactivity is not the goal, doing what excites you IS What hit me hard and made me realize it was time to quit my teaching job is when someone said I only had 25 more years to go before retirement. I couldn’t fathom working another 25 years in a job I wasn’t invested in. Not only that, but our mindset has shifted. If we are doing something we love, why would we want to retire?

I’m not going to pretend I’m happy for 25 years while waiting on a retirement fund that might not even exist when I retire. We don’t want to retire early. We want to spend our lives doing what excites us. Do you want to live a lie and end up broke and unfulfilled?

Financial freedom for us means having enough money to live the life that we’ve imagined and finding fulfillment. Keep listening as we chat about some more topics from the book, cashflow, and much more. Remember, there is no excuse for not living the life you want to live!

Resources & People Mentioned * The 4 hour Work-Week by Tim Ferriss * Essentialism by Greg McKeown

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Do you have the strength and courage it takes to overcome the fear and limiting beliefs that are holding you back? Are you afraid to go against the grain of how society dictates you need to live? If you’re seeking approval from everyone else but unhappy with who you are, it’s time to let go. It’s time to embrace your inner strength, be courageous, and take back control of your life. This episode of Both on Board is dedicated to being courageous and what that looks like for us.

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:45] Courage & Bravery * [4:40] Reach clarity: Ask deeper questions * [9:00] Incorporate this into your life * [12:10] What boundaries have you set? * [18:15] Overcome limiting beliefs * [24:10] Be careful who you seek advice from * [30:35] How to act in spite of fear * [34:00] Simple things make a large impact * [39:45] Do what is sustainable

What does your soul need? Are you lying to yourself about what you really want in life? Maybe you’re conforming to someone else’s dreams. Or you’ve kept yourself so busy that you haven’t given yourself time to learn what your purpose is in this life. It’s not about making other people happy.

It’s about building a life that leaves you happy and fulfilled.

It doesn't have to be a wife and kids, a house or a car. It doesn’t have to be the cookie-cutter expectations of society. Give yourself permission to live life on your terms. Have the courage and bravery to live the life you’ve imagined for yourself. Set aside time to find that clarity and ask deeper questions.

What walls do you need to tear down? We all build walls around ourselves to some extent as a means of protection. Protection from hurt, embarrassment, and the cruelty that we associate with the world. If you find yourself hiding behind the walls and limiting beliefs you’ve constructed for yourself, ask yourself this question: What is it that you’re afraid of?

Listen to what those inner voices are telling you—because they’re clues to what you need to overcome.

This inner chatter that makes you feel worthless and afraid is a protection mechanism that you can learn to disarm. Be compassionate with yourself, but start to tear down those walls brick-by-brick. Life is too short to not live it the way you want to.

Feel it, acknowledge it, then allow yourself to overcome your fear and move on to something better.

Choose your mentors and advisors wisely We always recommend finding a coach or advisor you trust that you can seek advice from. But we want to caution you to choose wisely. You shouldn’t run to a friend or family member who can’t be objective. You’ll learn nothing from someone who always takes your side. Even worse, if the person isn’t qualified, their limiting beliefs and outlook on the world can hinder your progress.

Find a coach or a mentor who is where you are trying to go. You need someone objective who will understand the scope of what you’re going through and help you see the big picture. They’ll help you limit the outside influences and voices that are telling you you’re not good enough.

It takes strength and courage to overcome fear Stop telling yourself that you’ll do something when you’re no longer afraid. The fear will never go away—you have to act in spite of it. How much time are you wasting by letting your fear win?

What is your fear costing you?

Are you going to look back on your life in 20 years and wonder where it all went? Don’t set yourself up to be filled with regret. You have the permission to live the life you desire. Don’t allow yourself to live in fear.

We encourage you to find ways to build belief in yourself. Journal, meditate, pray, and do something that builds your courage. Little-by-little you can change your life, until one day you realize you’re truly living your dreams.

Resources & People Mentioned * Eric Thomas * Eat That Frog! by Brian Tracy * Super Attractor by Gabrielle Bernstein

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Conflict is inevitable in a relationship—healthy conflict resolution seems rare. Too often couples let their anger fester, disagreements build, and resentment settles in. With the divorce rate so high, how do you avoid becoming a statistic? How do you change the conversation? In this episode of Both on Board, we share our framework for healthy conflict resolution to build a marriage that lasts.

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:50] The topic of conflict * [4:00] Our framework for conflict resolution * [6:15] Learn how to actively listen * [9:00] What else could this conflict mean? * [13:35] DO NOT bring up the past * [15:00] Be aware of your unconscious programming * [18:25] What are you committed to? * [21:50] Pursue your shared vision * [23:50] Your words are powerful * [25:00] Practice your daily disciplines * [28:30] The importance of a shared vision * [31:35] What am I resisting in myself?

Healthy conflict resolution begins with trust Your relationship needs to be built on mutual trust. Without it, you have a shaky foundation at best. If you don’t trust each other, you allow doubt to creep in. You begin to lose the belief that your spouse has your best interest in mind. This is a breeding ground for marital dysfunction.

Not only do you need to build trust, but you also need to believe in each other. Believe that the other person does have your best interest in mind. Believe that they are coming from a place of love. By doing these things, you are creating an environment for healthy conflict.

There are a few other things that make up our basic framework—make sure to listen to the whole episode to hear more!

Listen to understand—not to respond Active listening is one of the hardest things to master for anyone (ahem, we women may argue that it’s harder for men to master…). Think about it—you spend the entire time your spouse is talking trying to think of a comeback. Are you listening and comprehending what they’re saying? Or just preparing your rebuttal?

Instead of becoming defensive, respond by repeating what you think your spouse is trying to say.

They’ll see that you’re actively listening, trying to understand your point of view, and making an effort. Try to put yourself in their shoes and be compassionate. That doesn’t mean that you have to agree. But you are allowing each other to feel heard.

What do you do if you feel you’re not being heard? Listen to find out our tips!

How did your family handle conflict resolution? It is human nature to react to conflict the way you were conditioned to react. Ray and I grew up in completely different households and different environments. My family avoided conflict entirely, so I am programmed to avoid conflict. Ray’s family fought it out—loud and proud—and then subsequently forgot about it.

Two different worlds collide when you get married.

We are very different people coming together and need to find conflict resolution that works for us. So bring awareness to your style of conflict. I have to make sure I don’t withdraw from conflict and pretend there isn’t an issue. Ray has to learn to take a step back and let things simmer down before we have a conversation.

What type of conflict resolution (or lack thereof) did your family model in your childhood?

Remember you are 100% accountable for yourself There’s a saying that goes something like this: When you hammer a nail into a piece of wood the nails can be removed. But holes are left behind. So it is in an argument. If you are spewing hurtful words and reacting out of anger and frustration, those are words you can never take back.

You can never undo the damage you’ve caused by not controlling your words.

Your words are powerful.

Use them to build each other up, not tear each other down.

We believe in forgiveness—but the process of forgetting is far harder. So take responsibility for yourself. Make sure that you are taking care of you and filling your cup first so that you can put your best self forward and argue from a place of compassion and understanding, not anger.

Remember, you are 100% complete. Your spouse is 100% complete. You don’t complete each other. But when you come together you are exponentially better.

Resources & People Mentioned * Sharper Couples Retreat * Schedule a meeting with us now!

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Trying to overcome obstacles alone is impossible, but together you can feel invincible. 75Hard has taught us so much about who we are as individuals and we’ve learned so much about each other. It’s about mental toughness, exposing weaknesses, setting priorities, and removing time-wasting activities for your life. This episode of Both on Board is dedicated to learning how to be an overcomer.

Highlights From Our Conversation * [2:50] 75Hard Struggles * [8:15] Exposing your weaknesses * [13:00] Make Priorities fit the time you have * [16:40] Be intentional with everything you do * [18:40] The rain won’t last forever * [25:00] Bring awareness to your escapes * [29:00] Accountability, support, and understanding * [31:40] We are all about connection

Overcome obstacles by exposing your weaknesses 75Hard has pushed us to unexpected levels. Instead of the physical struggles that we’ve expected, our struggles have been emotional. It’s been internal. Overcoming the internal chatter that is what strengthens you. No one is forcing us to do this. We don’t have to do this. But we are choosing to do this.

And you know what? I am going to find a way to make this happen no matter what.

Feelings are temporary, right? 75Hard is bringing out struggles in each of us but we know why we’re doing this and we know we can overcome the temporary struggles. We didn’t start 75Hard to stay the same. We welcome the struggles, the change, and growth. We want to show up to this life at a higher level. What is your why?

You show up for what you prioritize Everyone always asks “how do you find the time to fit that into your schedule?”. We have the same amount of time as everyone else. The difference is we make our priorities fit the time that we have. We make time for 75Hard, and our business, and our family because they are important to us. We are pushing ourselves out of our comfort zones.

There is a cost to comfort: You are not growing or expanding.

Time is never an issue. We don’t delay our priorities. We face them head-on, and show up mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. We are learning to be intentional about everything we do. You must decide, commit, and remove time from the equation. You must take back your time and make it work for you.

Remember the rain doesn’t last forever It’s been a rainy few days in Florida. We’ve had some rainy outdoor walks but spend our days believing God will open a window of time so we won’t get poured on. The opportunity will come—it won’t rain forever. So it is in our personal lives. We all go through similar issues and struggles. But they don’t last forever.

Don’t waste time being a victim. Things happen, but they don’t happen to you. You and only you are responsible for how you react. So show up with the belief that you can take on anything and everything that comes your way.

Create a life you don’t desire to escape We all have ways that we try to escape life.

Watching TV, scrolling on social media, YouTube videos, drinking alcohol, etc. The list goes on and on. We think these temporary escapes will be freeing. Instead, we often feel drained and guilty for wasting our time.

It’s time to bring awareness to what we do to escape. Where do you devote your time?

Replace it with practices that put you in a better place. Read a book. Go for a walk. Time is emotion, and what we choose to focus on matters. Talk about what your priorities are, and support each other when you’re not at 100%.

Accountability, support, and understanding are key to overcoming the hurdles you face. Listen to the whole episode as we share our struggles, challenges, and wins together.

Resources & People Mentioned * Can’t Hurt Me by David Goggins * The 75Hard Challenge by Andy Frisella * The Way of Mastery by the Shanti Christo Foundation * Schedule a meeting with us now!

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Working together—whether you’re in the same business or working on separate projects—can be challenging. It requires accountability, support, and compassion. You have to learn to see things from your partner's perspective. You have to walk in their shoes. This episode of Both on Board is all about committing to a shared vision in practical and tactical ways and supporting each other on your journey.

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:50] From disconnect to connection * [5:30] Learn to see from your partner’s perspective * [8:20] Set up a reporting mechanism that works * [11:00] We care and want to make an impact * [14:40] 75Hard challenge is all about commitment * [17:30] Eliminate the option of doing anything else * [23:00] Building promises builds trust in yourself * [27:25] Be disciplined with your desires * [29:00] How commitment overflows in your life

Moving from disconnect to connection When Ray and I first started dating, we were working in separate careers. I would come home and share the struggles of my day, but Ray couldn’t fully understand where I was coming from. Then he’d tell me about a deal that fell through or something that he ran into during his day. Neither of us fully comprehending what the struggle really meant.

There was this disconnect between us.

On the flip side, when I retired from teaching and we launched our business together we were in the trenches together. We were completely on board, but our work consumed us. All we talked about was work. If you’d like to learn how we began to better integrate work and personal life, keep listening!

Being ‘both on board’ when working on separate projects Through the years we’ve been together, there have been seasons where we need to focus on different projects and come together when needed—this is one of them. Right now, Ray is headfirst in our loan business, and it consumes a lot of his time. My primary focus is Both on Board and building our impact.

So how do we come together and support and keep each other accountable?

We have a weekly meeting where we cover finances, details of the business, and more. Ray can fill me in so that I understand the details of what’s been consuming his time. I can share the progress I’ve made. We set aside a time to step into each other’s shoes and fully appreciate what the other is doing.

To get more details on how this process works for us and keeping each other accountable, keep listening!

How 75Hard teaches you commitment I know we’ve mentioned it already—but 75Hard has been a huge part of our lives lately, and it’s teaching us a lot. It’s a program with strict requirements. It’s not a weight loss program necessarily, but a program that strengthens your mental resolve. It’s not easy. Once you commit, you eliminate the option of doing anything else.

“I am going to do this and nothing is going to stop me”.

The process sharpens you mentally and as you keep your commitments daily, you begin to build your belief in yourself. It’s so much easier because we are both on board supporting each other every step of the way.

Be disciplined with your desires Learning how to commit to the promises you make to yourself is paramount. It’s why we are constantly practicing—whether it be daily commitments such as yoga and meditation or starting 75Hard. When you build consistency and become disciplined you can accomplish so much more.

Do your part in striving to reach what you desire, and allow the universe to do the rest. Go after what you want, and allow room for something better to come along. Leave space for grace, for God to do his part. Always be building on the vision you have for your life together.

Resources & People Mentioned * What Matters Most by Brian Scrone * The Way of Mastery by Shanti Christo Foundation * Schedule a meeting with us now!

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We recently attended a Sharper Couples Retreat that focused on relationship building activities and we fell in love. Some of the exercises we have done—and advocate for—but opened our eyes in a completely different way. From identifying our values as a couple to the wheel of life exercise, this episode is packed with helpful activities to build and strengthen your relationship.

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:45] What we have been up to * [2:10] Starting the 75Hard Challenge * [7:05] Identify your values as a couple * [13:00] What are your non-negotiables? * [15:00] Wheel of life exercise * [21:10] Most entrepreneurs lack consistency * [24:10] Stop breaking your promises * [28:30] The 5 Love Languages * [32:05] Chasing pleasure or living your purpose? * [36:00] People put their money where their heart is

Relationship building activities begin with your shared values This is something we have done together and we urge others to do the same. What you may not realize is that your values will change over time. Things that were important in one season of your life may no longer be applicable in the next. So be sure and strive to reconnect with each other about your values—but start by identifying your core values to live by. Here are ours right now:

Confidence
Clarity
Collaboration
Contribution
Connection

It comes down to this: what values are non-negotiable? The retreat gave us a controlled environment where we were encouraged to take time and go deep. Allow yourselves to do the same. To hear us explain our values and talk about the wheel of life exercise–keep listening!

Stop breaking the promises you make to yourself No one likes hearing this, much less admitting it to themselves, but entrepreneurs lack consistency. Most people lack the ability to keep the promises they make to themselves. Every time you break a promise you make to yourself you begin losing trust in yourself. Your confidence will wane.

So what can you commit to daily that will rebuild your confidence?

Our desire to start 75Hard was borne out of this retreat. I’ve seen Ray try and fail 75Hard many times—it is not easy. But we truly believe now that we are both on board and committing to this together that it’s a challenge we can overcome.

To hear more about 75Hard and the promises we have committed to keeping to ourselves, please listen to this wonderful episode!

The concept of the 5 Love Languages Are you familiar with the book The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman? He believes there are 5 core ways you can show love to your significant other. They are:

Words of Affirmation
Quality Time
Receiving Gifts
Acts of Service
Physical Touch

As an individual, it is important to know what gives you life—what act makes your soul happy? Do you love it when your spouse does the dishes for you? Does quality time with them leave you feeling fulfilled?

On the flip side, what is your spouse's love language? What can you do daily to make them feel loved and appreciated? We recommend doing this exercise every year because your needs and desires change.

What can you do to fill their ‘love tank’ today?

Are you chasing pleasure or living your purpose? Just let those words sink in for a moment.

Are you chasing pleasure or living your purpose?

Living out your values, building consistency, and keeping your promises all start with looking inward. Navigating your life is so much easier when you know who you are and what you’re here for.

When you are living your purpose your soul is on fire.

We challenge you to take a step forward and focus on who you are individually and collaborate and connect and decide what your shared values and goals are together. If you’re ready to take your relationship to the next level—dive in with us!

Resources & People Mentioned * The 75Hard Challenge by Andy Frisella * Sharper Couples Retreat * Coaches Training Institute Wheel of Life * The Compound Effect by Darren Hardy * The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman * The Way of Mastery by the Shanti Christo Foundation * Love Nudge on the App Store * Love Nudge on Google Play

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This episode surrounds the epic conversation of living a legacy—not leaving a legacy. People are always thinking about what kind of legacy they’re going to leave and lose track of how they want to live their life. Do you want to take your life back and truly live a legacy to be proud of? Listen to this episode for some of the best advice Ray and Joe Evangelisti have to offer.

Highlights From Our Conversation * [3:20] Bad advice people give * [9:20] Learning to just be yourself * [12:00] Presence and practice—not perfection * [17:20] Learning from your failures * [26:15] Getting good at saying no * [29:45] Legacy means impact * [33:30] Two things an entrepreneur should have

What can you do to just ‘be you’? We’ve all heard the phrase that “comparison is the thief of joy” right? But how often do you think about the truth behind it? The #1 thing you can do to just be yourself is to stop comparing yourself to anyone else. You are not here on this earth to copy anybody. Comparison just opens you up to unnecessary suffering.

The creator created you—so why try to be someone else?It is a disgrace to your creator.

To just ‘be you’, you have to learn who you are. So what’s the best way to do that? Learn to live in the moment. Practice meditation and truly listening to yourself. Practice the art of gratitude. The most practical way? Spend time with your children. They are constantly living in the present and allow you to do the same.

Choose presence and practice over perfection Meditation is something I’ve chosen to practice every day. It’s not just some hippy crap where you’re in a trance. It simply means taking time to center yourself, listen to your heartbeat, and be with your own thoughts. You don’t have to meditate.

But set aside 10 minutes a day to have completely to yourself.

You can meditate. You can journal. You can sit in silence.

Don’t make it more difficult than it needs to be. Simply slow down and take time to be in the moment. Don’t let life pass you by without moments to reflect. Keep listening as we chat about how Ray Dalio convinced GaryVee to meditate.

The power of learning from failure Life isn’t an achievement, it’s a school. We are constantly screwing up and making mistakes. I write down a list of my mistakes every week and review them. Why? So I can learn from my mistakes and avoid making them again.

You can’t be afraid to make mistakes. Instead, aim at constant growth.

As you fail and learn and grow your are building your expertise. No one is an overnight success. People can claim it—but it takes grit and endurance to build success. It takes 10-20 years to truly master something. Do you have the grit and determination to do what it takes?

What does living a legacy look like for you? Living a legacy encompasses a few different things for us right now:

We want to invest time in Valentina and each other.

We want to offer our story and expertise in this podcast.

We want to make an impact by giving to different charities and being involved in fundraising.

Whatever you decide to do, you need to listen to your heart and say no to what doesn’t fulfill you. Align yourself with the things that light your soul on fire. There are too many shiny distracting things out there, so always be aligned with yourself.

Listen to the rest of the podcast as Joe and I talk about disconnecting from our phones—I also deliver my most impactful advice. Don’t miss it!

Resources & People Mentioned * The Legacy Blueprint Podcast by Joe Evangelisti * Ray Dalio on GaryVee Podcast * Steal Like an Artist by Austin Kleon * Principes by Ray Dalio * Big Debt Crises by Ray Dalio * Bo Eason

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We tend to have the concept of giving and receiving twisted in our minds. You’ve all heard the bible verse “it is better to give than receive” (Acts 20:35). In some instances, this may certainly be the case. We applaud giving. But to give, your cup has to be full. To give fully, you have to learn to receive. In this episode of Both on Board we talk about giving from a place of abundance and learning that’s it’s okay to make yourself a priority.

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:50] Integrating Giving and Receiving * [5:10] Take 100% responsibility for yourself * [7:20] Schedule self-care into your life * [13:30] Deservability: sometimes we don’t feel worthy * [18:00] Don’t look for perfection, look for consistency * [26:15] Change your perspective * [30:00] Giving to end human trafficking

It’s okay to make yourself your #1 priority We are firm believers that to give 100% of yourself, you need to take care of yourself first. Give yourself permission to exercise self-care. This looks different for everyone—but find something that makes your soul happy. It could be yoga or working out. It could be drinking a hot cup of coffee watching the sunrise.

Don’t only give yourself “leftovers”. You deserve more than a stolen moment.

For the first 18 month of Valentina’s life, I was all give give give. I gave her all of my time and energy, and I began to suffer. I didn’t eat well, I wasn’t meditating, I wasn’t doing yoga. My relationship with Ray began to suffer because I was trying to give out of a place of emptiness. Listen as we talk about prioritizing yourself first, and how it was the best choice for us.

Schedule self-care into your life Once I realized I needed to flip the switch and reset my self-care routine I went a little overboard. I scheduled massages, hair appointments, nail appointments, etc. and filled my calendar. What I had intended to be self-care became a to-do list. I was doing all of these amazing things and it wasn’t making my soul happy.

So I took a step back and really clarified what my soul enjoyed.

Sadly, most people don’t even remember what fills them up anymore. Their lives have been so entangled with staying busy they’ve lost sight of what truly fulfills them. We want to challenge you to learn what brings you joy—then schedule it into your life. It doesn’t have to be time-consuming, it doesn’t have to be expensive, but it needs to be time spent filling your cup.

Remember that you are 100% worthy of receiving “I don’t deserve time off.”

“I don’t deserve a break.”

“My house is a mess, I need to take care of it”

It is time to overcome whatever lie you’re telling yourself or excuse you’re making. You deserve everything the world has to give you. You don’t need to earn anything. You are worthy. The concept of deservability is a problem and it needs to stop.

You need to cultivate an awareness of how you are treating yourself. Are the questions above lies that you tell yourself? Are you holding yourself to a standard of perfection that cannot possibly be reached? You may be experiencing anxiety and exhaustion in your life because you are not allowing yourself the self-care that you deserve.

Keep listening as Ray and I talk about integrating self-care into our life and how we allow each other flexibility and compassion.

Our season of giving Giving comes in many different forms, but right now we are blessed that can give monetarily. We’ve worked hard for years, and have co-created with God and the universe. We have opened up and allowed ourselves to receive the good things coming our way. We are at a point of overflowing and joyfully able to give.

Ray had this vision for a charity fundraiser he wanted to throw. He worked hard, calling people and organizing this amazing event. He wanted to control the way everything went, and the more he tried to exercise control the more difficult things were. When he finally decided to let go of his attachment to the outcome, people began giving in big ways.

We doubled what we were hoping to raise. If you are interested in giving or learning more, we are supporting a charity geared at ending human trafficking—International Network of Hearts. A link to their website and our gofundme page are in the show notes!

Resources & People Mentioned * International Network of Hearts Gofundme * International Network of Hearts * Book: The Way of Mastery by the Shanti Christo Foundation

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Is your life full of unrealistic standards that you can’t possibly live up to? Are you constantly striving for something and finally realizing you’re not enjoying the process? As entrepreneurs, we are so good at delaying gratification that when we finally have a dream within reach we self-sabotage. So how did Christy and I move past that? Listen to this episode of Both on Board to find out!

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:50] Overcoming Unrealistic Standards * [9:10] Give yourself permission to live the life you’ve designed * [13:00] The two most important decisions you can make * [18:10] Overcoming self-sabotage to obtain our dream * [25:10] Why your environment is important * [28:00] How a sandcastle taught me about life * [32:00] Don’t be overly attached to the outcome * Taking the leap and buying our second home

A dream was planted in me years ago as I was walking along South Beach with one of my friends. We came upon a high rise that was being built and I told him—one day I’m going to live there. I’ve been holding on to that vision for almost 18 years. Now, my dream is being fulfilled.

We currently own a home in a suburb where we can walk our daughter to school. We’re close to family and it’s become so comfortable. Christy and I have talked about owning something right on the beach for a few years and we just had to take the leap. We both desired something more.

How I overcame my unrealistic standards I had always dreamed of having a two-bedroom and at least one and a half bath with an ocean view. I had a perfect budget in mind and wanted everything to fit into this vision I had created for myself. Then the realtor showed us what was available—it was only one bedroom and the view was less than spectacular.

I was 100% ready to turn it down because it didn’t fit the unrealistic standards that I had set.

But Christy grounded me and reminded me of all of the things we were being offered. It was still in the high rise I’d dreamt of. We were minutes away from the ocean. It was only a 4-month lease so that we could truly feel out if it was the right decision for us. It also fit the budget I had asked for. All I had to do was say yes.

Christy helped me remove the intense emotion from the decision. She looked through an objective lens and helped me realize I was still getting the core of what I wanted: the amenities, the location, and the experiences that came with it.

The two most valuable decisions you can make The #1 decision that you can make in your life is choosing to be full of joy. We love the result that we have gotten. We’re fortunate enough to be able to own two homes and a successful business. We’re learning every day to enjoy the process of achieving our goals. We allow ourselves to enjoy the outcome of our hard work. Are you ready to do the same?

The 2nd decision you can make that I believe is extremely valuable is choosing the people you surround yourself with. It’s why we recommend mastermind groups and personal development. Even the environment you choose to live in makes an impact—in this new place we are surrounded by people operating at a high level. Keep listening to find out why we think these concepts are so important.

Enjoy what you’ve earned—but don’t let it be responsible for your happiness If you need something that is material in order to be happy then it’s not true happiness. There are many material things we enjoy, and we aren’t saying you shouldn’t try and get what you want. But don’t let them be responsible for your happiness. We’ve found that when we let go of the strong attachment we have for something we desire, is when we usually obtain it.

Let go of control, the need to plan every detail, and begin to ask yourself deeper questions. What is it that you truly desire? Decipher what your true standards are and be flexible with the rest so you can truly enjoy what you’ve worked so hard for. Don’t limit the possibilities of what the universe can offer you. If you want to hear more about this journey of ours, listen to the whole episode!

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In a world where everything pushes us to constantly go, manifestation tells us to slow down. It is about learning how to be in tune with yourself. As human beings, we are so conditioned to be influenced by the external world—and have lost touch with our internal selves. If you’re searching and ready to learn, this episode of Both on Board with Dr. Sangeeta Sahi wraps up the topic of manifestation. Don’t forget to listen to part one!

Dr. Sahi is an integrative medical doctor who studied in India and London. She’s traveled the world working with quantum physicists and biophysicists, searching for scientific means to explain what can only be labeled as miraculous. Listen to this episode as we explore her background and experience and she speaks about her knowledge of manifestation.

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:50] A recap of the last episode * [2:00] Being in tune with yourself and be with yourself * [5:25] What is love? What is connection? * [9:10] There is nothing you have to achieve * [17:10] Do not compare yourself with anyone else * [19:30] Change your perspective and learn how to slow down * [25:25] Visualizations, affirmations, and manifestation * [33:45] Spirituality is not a to-do list but a lifestyle * [39:00] Manifestation doesn’t just happen—it takes practice * [45:45] Final words of wisdom from Dr. Sangeeta Sahi

What is love? What is connection? When asked the question, most people have to pause and think about an answer. Is it a feeling? An emotion? The answer is far simpler: love just IS. Love is connection. When Ray and I are with our daughter we don’t have to think about loving her. We don’t have to define how we feel about her. Love for her envelopes us and just is.

We have an innate need to love and be loved. We do this by seeking connection. Children allow us to love and to be present, wrapped up in the moment. Why do we seek out friends? Why do we spend time with loved ones, sharing experiences with them? Because shared experiences give us the connection our soul’s crave.

Manifestation begins with slowing down The world around us creates a sense of urgency and tells us that we always need to be going, doing, and running ourselves ragged. We find ourselves addicted to urgency because we feel alive when we are constantly moving. But this isn’t fulfilling. It can’t lead to awareness of one’s self or higher purpose.

We must learn how to slow down.

Only then can we begin to embrace manifestation. The only “rule” of manifestation is that you must learn to control your thoughts. You must change your perspective. To do so, you must learn to stop. Stop making spirituality a to-do list and make it a way of life. We talk with Sangeeta about teaching this concept to our children—keep listening.

You must live every day in gratitude Sangeeta talks about visualization as a powerful way to lower stress. But manifestation cannot come from an external visualization—it comes from within. People often practice visualization and affirmations in a rote and rigid way and this is honestly useless. You have to have a deep emotion connected to the practices for them to be effective.

More specifically, we must learn how to be grateful—and express it.

It’s so simple, yet in our fast-paced lives we often forget to be grateful. We also need to learn how to be joyful. It isn’t an emotion, but a state of being. If you are not expressing joy you aren’t fully expressing who you are. When you embrace it, the world will take notice. Keep listening as we discuss money manifestation and how material wealth cannot buy you happiness (we promise, it’s not as cliche as it sounds).

Manifestation is not instantaneous—it is a practice Manifestation doesn’t just happen overnight. If it was an easy process, everyone would do it! Manifestation is a practice. You need to continually practice it, push forward, and learn how to let go and slow down. It is about finding integration and balance and learning how to find joy. Mastering a spiritual practice takes time, dedication, and persistence.

You can’t force things to be the way you want them to be. Control is a myth—it leaves no room for joy. All we can do is learn how to manage the things that are out of our control. Sometimes, all you need to learn how to do is slow down. Then, you’ll see that what you’ve been trying to manifest has existed all along.

Some parting words of wisdom from Dr. Sangeeta Sahi:

Remember that things come together in God’s timing.

Have faith that if a desire is inside of you it is part of your journey.

If a desire is influenced by what someone else has—it is not yours.

Above all, live in a state of gratitude that you have the opportunity to be alive.

Resources & People Mentioned * www.genuinehumanbeing.com * Dr. Sangeeta Sahi on LinkedIn * A Course in Miracles by The Foundation for Inner Peace * The Way of the Heart by Henri J. M. Nouwen

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Do you know what manifestation is? Do you know why it is a practice you should embrace? Manifestation is the process of bringing something into being—a thought, a desire, a belief becomes reality. In this episode of Both on Board we talk about manifesting from the heart with a special guest, Dr. Sangeeta Sahi.

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:50] We introduce Ramon’s mentor, Dr. Sangeeta Sahi. * [4:20] Dr. Sahi’s journey to learn to explain the unexplainable * [11:30] Manifestation stems from the heart: It’s all about love. * [21:00] The difference between spirituality and religion * [26:15] Manifestation and achieving a goal * [31:10] The idea of complex manifestations is introduced * [32:50] How to properly understand responsibility * [35:00] How do you become more self-aware? * [37:00] How to tap into awareness or alignment * [40:50] Brain chemistry, feelings, and emotions * [45:30] The concept of being deserving of something—and timing * [49:10] Learning to be less attached * [51:25] Be patient and in tune with yourself

It may seem cliche, but it’s true: It’s all about love Throughout her teenage years, Sangeeta experienced what she can only describe as “spiritual experiences” where she had a distinct awareness that she was in a different dimension or operating outside of time. She continued to experience these moments throughout medical school. She also had a deep intuitiveness that allowed her to understand what was happening in her patient’s bodies better than any imaging.

After her years of research and study in the field, one universal and eternal message remained for her: it’s all about love. The only way to truly understand anything—and to manifest anything—is through your heart. It is your soul’s desire that you are looking to bring to life in the physical dimension. You have the power to create it—but it is a complex collective experience. Dr. Sahi explains this in detail, so continue listening.

The difference between spirituality and religion Spirituality is not necessarily tied to religion. Dr. Sahi states that there is one main distinction between the two: religion has structure and rules and spirituality does not. That being said, spirituality can be an extension of your beliefs. In some ways, a structured religion gives you the “rules to live by” that define how you act in a community. Eventually, the rules and regulations are so ingrained in you that they no longer need to be your primary focus.

Consider an athlete, such as a football player. They’ve likely played the sport since childhood. The role they have learned throughout the years has become part of who they are. When they play the game they don’t need to think about every rule and regulation because the game is a part of them. This allows them to flow, to be in the moment, and to act outside of the realm of what’s possible. This is spirituality. The athlete is actively manifesting their belief in their skill.

Simple goal achievement and complex manifestation There are a few different steps associated with achieving a goal. In the episode, Dr. Sahi uses the example I provided—reaching my goal of attending a yoga class. So what does goal achievement look like?

You have a thought or idea that you want to implement.
You decide to follow through: this is a practical choice that you have the power to control. You must fix that decision in your heart—this releases and directs energy into your goal.
You automatically and instinctively work towards manifesting the goal and choose not to let anything else interfere. The closer you get, the more clarity and energy you feel.

This is a simple example because you have control over yourself and the decisions you make. As we strive after more complex manifestations, more variables are thrown into the mix. Continue listening as we discuss challenges you may face and the idea of responsibility.

How do you foster more personal awareness? Embracing spirituality can be daunting to some. A simple start is what we’ve championed all along—foster personal awareness. You want to tap into the awareness of who you are, what you’re here on this earth to do, and truly know yourself. Are you cultivating a conscious awareness of who you are? In our previous episode, we talked about meditation as a means of understanding yourself. It is a great first step in the process.

You want to place yourself in alignment with the universe. You cannot create what does not already exist, right? As you continue to learn and practice manifestation, hold on to the truth that there may be challenges, but you can bring your hearts desires to life. We continue discussing fostering awareness, mentorship opportunities, attachment and so much more in the rest of the episode.

This is part one of a two-part series, be sure to check out next week’s episode!

Resources & People Mentioned * www.GenuineHumanBeing.com * Conscious Cancer Course * PsychoNeuroEndocrinoImmunology * Dr. Sangeeta Sahi on LinkedIn

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Are you looking to find clarity on your soul’s purpose but don’t know where to begin? Are you tired of hearing everyone else's opinion but completely unsure of your own? In a world where we are constantly barraged with things we should be doing—what do you want? In this episode of Both on Board we will lay out what has worked for us. Your only task is to take our advice and decide if it will work for you.

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:50] Meditation and yoga as catalysts * [6:50] Develop a spiritual practice: what does your soul love to do * [12:45] Are you trying to escape OR find your purpose * [14:45] Tools we use to be present * [18:30] Create a spiritual practice that you commit to daily to understand who you are

Meditation is a powerful tool for finding clarity People tend to think of meditation as some new-age practice tied to a religion they don’t adhere to. In reality, it’s a practice that can benefit everyone that’s not necessarily tied to any religion. It can reduce anxiety and stress, promote emotional health, and cultivate self-awareness. Meditation is a tool that allows us to become familiar with ourselves. We know that removing distractions and spending time with yourself can be terrifying. As humans we are so afraid of silence because we are afraid of where our thoughts will take us.

But it can also lead to the clarity you’re looking for.

So how do you meditate? The simplest way is to carve out a length of time and go somewhere quiet without distractions. Breath in for 6 seconds, hold your breath for 8, and breath out for 10 seconds. Focus on your breath and your heartbeat. The goal isn’t to empty your mind, but it is about removing external distractions and controlling where your thoughts go. It helps you to become familiar with yourself and cultivate an awareness of who you are.

Develop a spiritual practice that you commit to daily What does your soul love to do? What grounds you, brings you joy, and allows you to just be in the moment? I love Yoga and Ray loves working out. Perhaps for you it’s journaling, being in nature, or playing music. Take time to prioritize those things that your soul loves. We encourage you to develop your own spiritual practices.

Honestly, If it’s important to you, you will find the time.

If you have a job, children, and are being pulled in a million different directions—we get it. But if you have time to watch TV, scroll through social media on your phone, or fill your time with distractions you have time. Do you want to prioritize personal development? Are you ready to clarify your purpose? Take control of your day and don’t let excuses hold you captive.

Are you doing things just to do them? Or to find your soul’s purpose? I think we all go through phases in our lives where things are go, go, go. We are constantly running around, filling our time. It’s important to really look at what you’re doing—is it necessary? Are you committing yourself to things just to stay busy, or escape? Take a step back and ask yourself clarifying questions. Are you going to look up in 10 years and realize that you haven’t been enjoying life? Now is the time to find what gives your life meaning and fulfills you. Don’t let your life slip away from you and look back with regrets.

You are whole, complete, and perfect You do not need to be anyone else—we are unique beings with a unique purpose. Remember, you are whole, complete, and perfect just as you are. Utilizing meditation can be a way to find what makes your soul happy, and learn to embrace your unique gifts. You want to live and express who you are. People will take notice, be attracted to and inspired by you.

You want to simply do your life and fulfill your purpose.

It’s all about learning to be present. Find ways to ground yourself and cultivate self-awareness. Learning to listen to your heart and soul and removing external distractions and thoughts is key. Our spiritual needs include being able to grow and being able to give. So what will you do today to take that next step?

Resources & People Mentioned * The basics of meditation

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Effective communication in marriage is an art that must be cultivated in your journey together. Do you struggle with incorrectly assessing the meaning in situations? Do you understand the way you react? To effectively work through arguments—we like to call them life lessons—you have to understand where your emotions are stemming from. In this episode of Both on Board we’ll talk all about how to navigate life lessons together while communicating effectively.

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:50] Why you shouldn’t try and change each other * [5:00] Why you don’t need to model your spouse * [7:40] Your goal is to help your spouse shine their light * [11:20] Our example of working through an argument * [17:20] Do not speak with each other while you’re still angry * [21:00] Allow each other to work through situations at your own pace * [24:30] The negative situations are there to teach you something * [28:20] How life is a practice and a process * [32:25] The questions we need to ask ourselves * [36:00] Our reset exercise to ‘return to love’

Don’t try to change or become your significant other Variety is the spice of life, right? You were attracted to your spouse because they were unique individuals that were different than you. Who they are is something you love. Perhaps they have some habits or traits that annoy you—which is completely normal. But you should not feel compelled to change or control the other person.

Along those same lines, your spouse may have traits that you love and would like to emulate. It’s admirable, but the world needs you and your unique skills and personality. You don’t need to become someone you’re not. Our goal in life should be to help each other shine their light. We feel the best way to do this is to complement each other, not change or become the other person.

Don’t assign meaning when it isn’t there Do you want to be right, or do you want to be happy? As you listen to this episode we give you an example of an argument we recently had. It turned into a debacle because I assigned meaning that wasn’t there. I thought Ray was disrespecting me. In reality, the situation was entirely different. Instead of taking time to step back and respond differently, I reacted.

I could’ve handled the entire situation differently, right?

We each have the control to assign meaning to any given situation. But we would caution to not assign meaning without understanding the full spectrum of the situation. Humans are complex individuals and you should have zero expectation that the other person knows what you’re thinking or feeling. Listen as we talk about the situation and our thought process when working through an argument.

The negative experiences are there to teach you something An argument is just a moment in time in your relationship. The goal is to get to a point where you argue, you learn from it, and move on quickly. But in order to learn from it, you have to confront it. If you don’t, the same issues and problems in your relationship—and life—will keep coming up. You do not want to stay stuck in the same place and keep reliving the same problems for the next 30 or 40 years!

An old Chinese proverb states that a problem and an opportunity are the same things. If you change your mindset and an argument or situation becomes an opportunity versus a problem it changes everything. I need to take a deep look at myself and develop an awareness of where the issues are arising. If I can learn and grow and evolve as a person then I can better learn from the situations we find ourselves in.

Create space to ask yourself the hard questions A great method that we try and utilize when we find ourselves in the throes of an argument consists of three steps:

Give each other space to change the state of mind that we are in. Trying to work through something when we are both operating from a place of anger will not be productive.
Come back and connect when the timing is right. Ray knows I am not in the right headspace until after I’ve done yoga in the morning and I’m awake and coherent.
As you are giving each other space and waiting until the timing is right, ask yourself some tough questions. Why did I react the way I did? What triggered it? What meaning did I assign that perhaps wasn’t there? What can I learn from this?

Life is a learning process and we need to allow ourselves to embrace the imperfection and the learning curves to experience joy. We’ve just given you a snapshot of all that this episode covers—listen to the rest to learn more about our communication methods and where they stem from.

Resources & People Mentioned * Ed Mylett video on Masks * The Success Principles by Jack Canfield

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Are you struggling to find happiness in your everyday? Do you find yourself comparing your life to a social media reel, and it doesn’t measure up? If you find yourself struggling with questions of who you are, what your purpose is, and how to be happy—you aren’t alone. We all struggle at one time or another with questioning who we are. In this episode of Both on Board we chose to be vulnerable with you and open up about some of life’s deepest questions.

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:50] Figuring out who you are * [4:55] Challenge: get silent, meditate, and listen * [9:45] Alignment, action, and adjustments * [13:20] Expect things to work out * [16:00] Fulfillment is different for everyone * [18:05] What we need to stop doing * [22:00] Identify the root cause of your lack of happiness * [24:25] learn to embrace the blank space in your calendar * [27:45] Simplify and make room for joy

Find answers in meditation, prayer, and silence Many of us are driven by a need to plan out every aspect of our lives. We want to know why we’re here on this earth and what our purpose is but at a total loss of how to figure that out. So we’re constantly on the go, constantly filling our time, just hoping things fall into place. Ray was challenged recently to spend some time in meditation—without listening to music—simply listening to his own breathing.

It required him to give upcontrol.

As an entrepreneur, this is a struggle! We are used to going out and doing more—not taking time to do less. When you sit and meditate, or pray, and just allow yourself to be open is when the unconscious begins to come to light. Ray likes to call it “thoughts on thoughts,'' You're taking some time to think about what unconsciously comes to your mind when you sit in silence. It can be uncomfortable, but it can be powerful. You can find answers to some of your deepest questions if you allow yourself to listen.

Figure out the ‘what’ and the ‘why’ and let the ‘how’ fall into place Have you heard the phrase “We plan, and God laughs”? Often, we are so focused on planning something that we lose sight of other possibilities. We recently planned a charity event to raise money for kids who have been involved in human trafficking. We raised $60,000 in only 15 days. We had an exact plan for how we wanted everything to go—and ended up receiving more donations from people who didn’t come to the event.

Don’t become so focused on the how that you forget the reason why. Submit your plans to the Creator and find alignment, take action, and be willing to make adjustments. Focusing on every aspect of how something should be done limits the possibilities. Do you want something as you planned it, or do you want to allow God to take it and make it something bigger and better, faster? Keep listening as we talk about expectations, living in the present, and how fulfillment is different for everyone.

What is the root of your unhappiness? Take one day and track everything you do throughout that day. Then, look back, and think about how those things made you feel. Did scrolling through Instagram bring you joy, or did it depress you? How did you feel about exercising, the food you ate, and the work you did? Are you spending your time immersed in television drinking alcohol because you’re trying to find an escape? Because you hate how you’re spending time?

Take back control. Find the root of your unhappiness.

Make two lists: one of the things you do, and another of the things that you love to do. Take those lists, and compare them. What can you eliminate that doesn’t bring you joy? Take responsibility and begin to weed out things in your life that aren’t serving you. If it’s not a hell yes for me—then it’s not happening! Remember, “no” is a complete sentence. What do you need to start saying no to?

Find happiness in emptiness Wait—emptiness? That seems so counterintuitive, right? We just talked about learning how to say no to things that don’t bring you joy. What that leaves is an empty space in your calendar to invest your time. Take that white space and meditate. Go on a walk and enjoy nature. Immerse yourself in painting, music, or whatever brings a smile to your face.

For weeks, Ray and I found ourselves binging on Amazon. We constantly had packages being delivered of different things we “needed” but ultimately were just gadgets that we wanted. They cluttered our space and we weren’t satisfied with them. So we made a conscious decision to only buy things we truly needed. We began the process of simplifying, and when we did buy one thing that we wanted, it brought us much more joy than the many things we purchased just because we could.

This podcast was unscripted and we came with no agenda in mind—we simply wanted to be open and honest about our journey. Listen to the whole episode as we open up and let our thoughts flow about finding happiness and fulfillment.

Resources & People Mentioned * The Way of the Heart by Henri J. Nouwen * The Universe Has Your Back by Gabrielle Bernstein

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Why is the divorce rate so high among couples working together? How do you protect your marriage and business? In this episode of Both on Board we turn things upside down—we get interviewed by Brian Trippe! We cover personal development and awareness, communication, leading by example, and touch on our core beliefs behind co-creating a life and a business that works for you.

Brian Trippe graduated from the University of Alabama with a Bachelor’s in Journalism and English, and a Masters in Education. He began his career in real estate in 2012 and has completed over 500 real estate transactions since. He owns a wholesale company, a brokerage, and a coaching business and has a portfolio of rental properties. On top of it all, he created and hosts the REI Live podcast—check it out!

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:50] We are interviewed by Brian Trippe! * [3:00] We talk about our beginnings * [7:00] How do you get both people on board? * [11:25] Self-Discovery needs to happen first * [16:45] Don’t get tripped up trying to change the other person * [20:00] A woman's perspective in a man’s world * [24:25] Goals for the podcast and beyond * [29:10] Resources available

Take responsibility for how you show up in your relationship Brian asks a question that we get asked often: How do you get both people on board? When a couple is on two different wavelengths, how do you sync up? Our #1 answer will always be to start with personal development. You have the responsibility to develop an awareness of who you are, what you want, and what you want to be, right?

So take ownership of your actions every step of the way.

You—and only you—hold complete responsibility for how you act and react. Perhaps something has been bothering you. Or you’re having a discussion with your spouse that has taken a turn for the worst. Take a step back! Why are you reacting the way you are? Is something deeper going on that’s contributing to the argument? Take time to reflect so you can respond in a healthier way that is not divisive.

Define and get clarity on what you are about together After you’ve taken steps towards self-discovery and have a clearer picture of who you are and what you want for your future, take time to dive into who you are together. On one of our first episodes, “How You Can Design Your Life Vision With The Perfect Day Exercise”, we give you one of our favorite tools to start laying the framework for your future together. Do the exercise separately, and then come together and compare and see where your dreams overlap.

Are you aligned with your core beliefs? Do you have shared goals? Sometimes, your beliefs and values don’t necessarily line up. But you can’t force your significant other to be something they’re not. We truly believe as you continue to focus on personal growth and begin to change that your spouse will see that change and be intrigued—and begin to realize they too want what you’re seeking after.

Allow your spouse to speak into your life You need to lead by example but also be open to learning from your spouse. One example that we like to use is the fact that I've never been a gym person. Ray will go consistently many times a week, but would never force me to go. Instead, he set the example and I saw results. I’ve never liked the gym, but recently decided I’d give it a shot—now I’m loving it!

I noticed what Ray was doing and decided I’d try it for myself. The point is, he never tried to change me. He never tried to force me into a mold that worked for him. Don’t get tripped up in trying to change the other person! Recognize that you each have unique skills, abilities, and dreams and that you were created to complement each other. Not be each other.

Keep listening as we talk about our strengths and weaknesses and how we’ve learned to complement each other and embrace who we are. We also talk about a woman’s perspective in what is traditionally a man’s world—you don’t want to miss it!

Future goals for our podcast—and beyond We have so many goals and dreams and places we want to take this podcast. We’d love to continue hosting MasterMind groups, run seminars, and host retreats. One of the loftier yet worthy goals we have is to help couples realize that divorce is not the answer. We would love to eradicate divorce by helping people strengthen their marriages, becoming what they were meant to be individually and as a couple building a life together.

Ultimately, your life can be anything you desire it to be—it just depends on how hard you’re willing to work for it. You have much more potential when you both show up in your marriage and your business. The power of two people working in alignment is extraordinary! So this is your call to action. What can you do today to grow as a person? What can you do to grow together?

Resources & People Mentioned * Brian’s Book: Nothing’s For Sale

Connect With Brian Trippe * REI Live Podcast * REI Live Facebook * REI Live Instagram * LinkedIn

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Positive communication begins with an awareness of your self-talk. We’ve interspersed a lot of information about how we communicate with ourselves and each other throughout our podcast. Today we will dive deep into the world of self-awareness when it comes to your inner communication. We’ll also talk about words we never allow ourselves to say, changing the language you use, and having a perspective of gratitude.

Highlights From Our Conversation

[0:48] Why the word ‘can’t’ limits your possibilities
[5:30] Switch “I have to do this” to “I get to do this”
[10:50] Self-Awareness: why do you feel like you should do something?
[12:20] The ‘what if’ game—in a positive way
[13:40]This is happening, what are we going to learn from this?
[15:00] Are you reacting or responding?
[18:30] Take responsibility for how you’re showing up
The words you use either limit you or empower you

There is an approach to communication called Neuro-linguistic programming (NLP). The premise is that there is a connection between neurological processes, language, and behavioral patterns. The learned behaviors attached to these can be altered, or re-learned, to achieve whatever goal you’re working towards. Most people aren’t aware of the negative language they use towards themselves. We believe there is power in the words you use!

If you’re constantly telling yourself that you can’t do something or can’t achieve a goal, you are programming yourself to believe that negative self-talk. We do not say can’t to ourselves, each other, or our daughter. We don’t want to limit the possibilities of what we can accomplish by claiming that we can’t do it! Keep listening as we talk about re-framing the way you think.

I don’t have to do something—I get to do it Often we are consumed by things we don’t want to do. Whether it be a work project, cleaning your home, or cooking, as examples. Maybe you’re tired and don’t want to cook. But you need to change your mindset. You don’t have to cook. Instead, you get to make a meal for your family because you have the money and means to be able to do so. That small shift in mindset changes everything! You need to be intentional with the words you use, both internally and externally.

Remove ‘I can’t’, ‘I have to’, and ‘I should’ from your vocabulary. How do you accomplish something you think you can’t? What do you get to do to support yourself or your family? Is something you think you should be doing really that important? Change the negativity into something positive you use to build up yourself and others. Keep listening as we talk about utilizing self-awareness, and what is driving your negative self-talk.

Play the ‘What if’ game—in a positive way When you think about the what-ifs in life, you’re typically always focused on the negative questions, right? What if something goes wrong? What if I put all of my money into this investment, but lose it all? Do not play the game this way. You will only speak into existence all of the negativity and bad things that could happen.

Instead, remember that the universe has your back.

One of my favorite quotes is “life is happening for me, always, in all ways.” So ask yourself, what if I make this investment and grow our income? What if we move to a different neighborhood and have access to better schools? If you focus on what you can gain or what the positive impact could be—it could change everything.

Are you reacting to life circumstances, or responding to them? The only thing you have power over when something happens to you is how you react. We aren’t naive, we do recognize that we do not have power over some things that will happen in life. But we choose not to label something as good or bad. Instead, we focus on what we can learn from it. We choose to respond to the situation instead of reacting to it. So what does that mean?

Do not let your problems use you.

Reacting to any given situation is action without thought. Responding is taking a pause, thinking through possible reactions, and then choosing the best response for the situation. You are taking a situation of which you have no control over, and putting yourself back in control. Do not express emotion from fear! Listen to the rest of the episode as we talk about practicing gratitude, questions to ask yourself, and how communicating effectively starts with communicating positively with yourself.

Resources & People Mentioned * Awaken the Giant Within by Tony Robbins * 6 Questions to Solve Any Problem * Neuro-linguistic programming * The Universe Has Your Back by Gabrielle Bernstein

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So many people believe that the key to a healthy relationship is the proper work-life balance, but we believe in work-life integration. We work together, we live together, and we have built a life and a business together. Why would we want to separate those things? In this episode we will talk about this commonly asked question and what we do instead. We’ll give you some helpful resources along the way.

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:50] Work-life integration * [2:15] Why we don’t compartmentalize * [7:35] Wheel of Life * [13:45] Strategies we’ve used * [18:20] Timing is everything * [21:45] Be mindful of your headspace * [24:45] Be supportive of each other * [27:15] Figure out what works for you

Human beings weren’t built to compartmentalize There is a reason so many people struggle to find a work-life balance—because it’s not the way we as humans work. Let me give you an example: If Christy and I have a fight that doesn’t find immediate resolution, it weighs on my mind. I can’t go close a business deal and expect to be in the right headspace, right? It’s because my heart and my emotions are elsewhere.

We work and live at home and it is natural for us to talk about work when thoughts come to our mind. Sure, there are times when we need to realize we shouldn’t be talking shop. So instead of compartmentalizing work in one box and our personal life in another, we build boundaries. Keep listening as we talk about what this means and how it is a better strategy for us.

Utilizing the Wheel of Life to find your priority Yes, you read that right. One singular priority. In the “7 Game Changers for Highly Effective Couples” that we offer we include an example of the ‘wheel of life’. We also have it in our show notes below. It’s a great tool you can use to assess where you need things to change in your life. Identify where you are, where you want to be—and then strategize and find action steps to take to get you there.

Then, in each season of your life, focus on the one part of the wheel you need to develop. As you invest in growing in the areas you’re weakest in, the wheel will become more balanced. It’s all about finding the right formula that works for you in your relationship. There’s no solid answer and it’s not a science. It’s an art. Keep listening as we talk about our priorities and what’s been important to us in different seasons.

It’s all about timing—and knowing your boundaries Integration as a strategy doesn’t mean we don’t set boundaries. There are times where we just aren’t feeling well and can’t get in the right headspace to work. It’s okay to recognize that it’s time to focus on self-care, and set aside work for a time. Whether it’s going for a walk, doing yoga, or even taking a nap you need to prioritize your well-being.

We aren’t all work and no play. We also set aside time for our daughter and each other. We spend time doing things that bring us joy. Christy and I also take the time to connect with each other every night. We talk about our day and what we learned. We may even touch on work things. It’s all about having an awareness of when it’s the right time for something.

Find the best work-life integration model that works for you Eventually, as you try different strategies and choose different focuses, you will find a rhythm that works for you. That is key. Don’t be afraid to test things out and scrap them if they don’t work. Then you try another strategy until you find a way to integrate your life and work that works for the both of you.

Dave Meltzer has 4 Core Principles that we feel holds the whole wheel of life together:

Practice gratitude and appreciation—focus on the positive and all of the ways you’ve been blessed.
Have empathy and compassion for yourself and others. Learn to forgive and move on.
Be accountable. When you make a mistake, own it. More importantly, learn from it and change.
Communicate effectively from the heart. Inspire others.

Hopefully some of these strategies we find helpful can make an impact for you! Listen to this episode as we cover this topic we love!

Resources & People Mentioned * Ed Mylett’s podcast with guest Cesar Millan * Dave Meltzer’s 4 Steps to Happiness * Wheel of Life Template

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Everyone defines success in life differently. For us, it’s living a life by design that we are happy with where we can also give to others. Because we have been so intentional with our lives, we’ve been pretty successful at a young age. We are always being asked what the secret to our success is. So we wanted to devote an episode to all the things we do differently than everyone else. Things that you, too, can do to become successful. This is one you don’t want to miss!

Highlights From Our Conversation * [2:45] 1. Willing to work hard and delay gratification * [6:40] 2. Don’t have a back-up plan * [8:58] 3.The decision to do everything together no matter what happens * [15:08] 4. Commitment to personal development * [20:55] 5. Be intentional with everything you do * [26:38] 6.Collaborate with your spouse and the world * [30:09] 7. Closing our business because it was no longer serving us * [34:35] 8. Waiting to have children until we were financially ready * [38:02] 9. Selling our home and deciding to rent and move when we want * [40:58] 10. Give yourself permission not to fit the mold

Find your passion and invest your time and money in it In previous episodes, we talk a lot about how we invested our time and resources into our business. But sometimes people don’t realize how much. For six years we dove into our business, and any money we had (that didn’t go towards personal development) was constantly recycled back into the business. We exercised discipline and delayed gratification. Our obsession with building our business is what made it so successful.

It wasn’t until the later years that we finally started making money. As cliche as it is—our blood, sweat, and tears were poured into this thing that we had built from the ground up. We wanted it to keep growing and after years of hard work, we started to reap the fruits of our labor. Keep listening as Ray talks about a powerful illustration by Les Brown that really describes our business.

Don’t set yourself up to fail by having a backup plan I think a huge thing that terrifies people is the thought of giving up a stable job for something that could fail. A new business venture is both frightening and exciting but if you’re passionate about it you can make it work. I didn’t give myself a plan B. Instead of taking a leave of absence from teaching, I turned in my resignation. I burned the boat and decided there was no turning back and it was completely freeing.

We’ve learned through the years that you can’t have everything—but you can have everything you want at the level you want. I was no longer happy teaching, right? So I left it and found myself working with Ray in a business we were passionate about and that we needed to be successful in. Knowing there was no back-up plan was a huge driving force behind that success.

Know your fears so you’re not motivated by them Playing off of not having a backup plan is the firm belief that we were going to do this life together, no matter what. Not everyone has the support of their significant other and we vowed that that wouldn’t be us. But there were still so many unknowns. There’s this great Ted Talk by Tim Ferriss that we have in the show notes below, but the gist of it is this: take the time to walk through your greatest fears and identify the worst things that could happen.

Could we find ourselves without the money for basic needs such as food?

Would we lose everything and be homeless?

Could we live with the consequences of our actions?

In all of these things, we realized that we have a support system of family and friends that would never let us be homeless. As disheartening and potentially embarrassing as it may be if we lost it all, we had people to lean on. But we chose to do everything we could on the front end to mitigate the worst case scenario. The huge thing for us was completely supporting each other 100% and simply knowing that no matter what happened we were in it together.

Be intentional about what you do...and how you react Something we believe everyone needs to learn to do is say no. As much as you want to, you can’t do everything. Secondly, there is always a trade-off. If you say yes to something you don’t really want to do (or you feel pressured to do), what is the thing you’re having to give up? Be very intentional about what you choose to do—especially prioritizing your health. If you aren’t in a good place, your relationship and business won’t be either.

You also need to be intentional about how you react. Life isn’t always going to be easy. You’re going to experience hardship and hurt. Every time we made a mistake or something didn’t go as planned, we labeled it a “learning lesson”. We chose to change our perspective. You must choose to focus on the positive. Have gratitude for what you do have. Don’t focus on what you don’t have, but shift your perspective and instead focus on how you can achieve what you want to have.

We have a lot more to share with you, so you’ll have to listen to the rest of the episode to hear the other 5 things we do differently that we believe helped us find success!

Resources & People Mentioned * Les Brown Bamboo Tree Video * Tim Ferriss Ted Talk * Money, and the Law of Attraction by Esther and Jerry Hicks

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How do you know what investment opportunities are right for you? How do you decide as a couple where to invest your money and your time? We’ve covered personal development extensively and have walked you through our personal story. So today we are going to expound a little on the things we’ve chosen to invest in as a couple along the way. You don’t want to miss this one!

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:48] External and Internal Investments as a couple * [6:20] Working ON the business, not IN the business * [12:50] Look at the data for direction * [17:38] The market gives and takes away * [21:55] Investing in freedom * [27:30] Investing in things that matter

Investing our time and money into education Investing isn’t just about money. When Ray and I first started our business venture together, when we weren’t working, we spent as much time as possible learning. We’d go to the free classes offered by the Miami Association of Realtors. We invested in educating ourselves as much as we possibly could. In this phase of our life, anything extra went back into investing in knowledge.

During this phase of internal investment, we also spent money on seminars, personal development books, audible books—whatever means of learning we could get our hands on. We once had a former employee drop by the office over the weekend to grab something she had left behind, and she was appalled that we were in the office “On a Saturday?!” But you know what? If you want to grow you’ve got to do the work!

In every phase of our lives, we continue and will always continue to invest in personal development. We will always talk about it because we believe it is that important. After all, your business is only going to grow as far as you are. If your personal growth is stunted, it will affect every area of your life and business.

Working ON the business, not IN the business In our Spring season, all of our time was spent in the ins and outs of growing our business. As we achieved growth, we added staff to our team. We were able to stack money and build capital. We took everything we had learned, put it into action and were finally seeing the fruits of our labor. We had delayed gratification and instead invested our money into growing our business.

It was 100% the right move.

We took our capital and continued wholesaling, fixing, and flipping properties. We took everything one step at a time and as we showed up we naturally saw the next step. When we hit resistance and didn’t know where to turn we took a deep dive into our finances and it gave us clear direction—some things we were doing just weren’t making money and it was time to move on. So we veered away from wholesaling and started investing in rental properties

Investment Opportunities that don’t fit the mold Obviously, a lot of our investment was monetary. It was used towards our business or personal development. But we decided it was time to start investing in our freedom and moving towards the life we desired. At this point in time, Christy had been home with our daughter for a year and I was grinding it out in our business. What had worked for years suddenly just… didn’t.

So we sold it all. We offloaded our rental properties and investments and liquidated our team. We managed to sell in the right seasons, and all of the properties we had held onto suddenly brought us more capital. We simplified, decided what we did or did not need, and took that money and began investing it into the next phase of our business as a couple—investing in others.

Invest your time in things that make an impact We’ve known for a while that we aren’t operators. Building teams and managing and training isn’t where we excel. So we are taking the capital we’ve earned, and investing in other operators that we trust who have a vision. We’ve moved into the business of risk management, and that works for us right now. Will it always be that way? Who knows. But we are always moving of growth and what works for the season of life that we’re in.

But investing our lives to make an impact is what really drives us. It’s why we are doing this podcast! We take our money and use it to hire spiritual coaches. We currently utilize fitness coaching and financial coaching as well. We have added high-level people to our business team. Whatever we are doing, we are always looking to grow so we, in turn, can invest in the growth of others. Where do you want to invest your time and money?

Resources & People Mentioned * Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell * Essentialism by Greg McKeown * Miami Association of Realtors

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In episode four we talked all about your money mindset and how certain behaviors are ingrained in you since childhood. In this episode, we want to talk about what you do when you’ve got the money—how to have a fulfilling life. From talking about your money blueprint, where you place value in your life, to investing in giving, we’ve got you covered with this episode!

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:55] The evolution of the money mindset * [4:05] Don’t project your problems on your significant other * [8:17] What are you drinking alcohol for—are you celebrating or escaping? * [11:20] The art of fulfillment * [17:35] What is stopping me from sitting in first class? * [22:18] 5 regrets of the dying * [23:39] Using the money muscle * [28:00] We spend money investing in our joy * [35:15] What are the things you can do to buy back your time? * [42:50] Find out what is important to you and your spouse and make it happen * [46:30] Go make more money!

Finding abundance starts with taking action Achieving abundance truly starts with having a thought, which leads to a feeling, but starts with an action. We can create vision boards, daydream and visualize all we want but until we begin to take action, we won’t be moving in the direction of our dreams. And that’s what this podcast is all about right? We want to help you design the life you’ve been dreaming of!

You’re out of alignment with the universe if you want something, but you aren’t doing anything to go out and get it. So we took action—even imperfect action will do—and we went out, worked hard, and found success. But we truly believe that success without fulfillment is wasted and is the ultimate failure. Listen to this episode as we address our journey to finding fulfillment.

What first class flying taught me about life I was boarding a flight and forced to walk by all of these people in first class, and I found myself giving them the stink-eye. It was annoying to have to settle into my spot with the rest of economy class. I hated how I was responding in that moment. What they had was such a trigger for me! I wanted to be able to sit in first-class. I was projecting hatred on these people but the real issues was within me. With awareness of that fact, something hit me.

What was keeping me from sitting in first class? Why couldn’t I have that?

The jealousy became fuel for me to go and get what I wanted. To some, it seems like a waste of money because we are all going to the same place. But some of those seats are really comfy! The moral of the story is this: if you see someone that has something you want, bless them. Then go out and do what it takes for you to have it, too. Keep listening as we talk about abundance and finding clarity.

Spend money investing in joy and a fulfilling life We like to interpret this a couple different ways. We spent a lot of time clarifying what we want, and flying first class is one of the things that we enjoy. As Ray likes to say, “They made these seats for somebody, might as well be me!” We invest in travel and adventure, experiences, and living where we want. Like we’ve said before, we are not living our life by anyone else’s expectations and standards. The truth is, what we choose to spend our money on can be completely different from you, and that’s okay.

The second way we invest our money and time that brings us Joy is giving back. Ray and I truly believe that we are blessed, and therefore can live a life of blessing others. We need to make an impact, need to serve, and feel drawn to help other couples find abundance in their life. We are building a life that we don’t need a vacation from—so can you! Continue listening along as we talk about the ‘top regrets of the dying’, and other questions to really make you think.

What are things you can do to buy back your time? Something we decided to do years ago was to start buying back our time by eliminating some of the things we don’t enjoy. Ray doesn’t like to drive, and would rather spend the time doing something else, so he takes Ubers everywhere. I don’t love cleaning our house, so for the last seven years we’ve paid someone $120 a week to do it. Then I invest my time elsewhere—doing yoga, spending time with our daughter, returning emails, etc.

So what can you remove from the list of things you hate to free up time to do the things you love?

As you already know, we love to invest our time and money into personal development. This year alone we’ve invested 6 figures. It’s always proven to be one of our best decisions. Listen to the rest of this episode as we cover “Money Dials: Why you spend the way you do” by Ramit Sethi. We’ll lay out for you the things we love to spend money on, why it’s worth it to us, and how it brings us fulfillment.

Resources & People Mentioned * Wishes Fulfilled: Mastering the Art of Manifesting by Wayne Dyer * Secrets of the Millionaire Mind by T. Harv Eker * Money Dials: Why you spend the way you do by Ramit Sethi

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The learning curves of business growth can be difficult, but it was something we truly enjoyed overcoming together. We were seeing some success and hiring staff to keep things on track. In this episode, we continue where we left off and cover the next seasons of our lives. We’ll take you from building our business to selling it off, and where we are today.

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:50] Part 2 of our life story * [3:10] Started selling off some properties and “rehabbing” others * [10:15] We realized we are not operators and managers * [16:36] Wins, pains and lessons learned * [20:33] We sold remaining properties and started to simplify life * [23:20] Where our journey to clarity started * [29:50] “Spring cleaning” and work transitions * [38:00] Brought everything in house and hired top tier players * [43:00] What our lives look like and why we do what we do

Business growth was our catalyst for change As our business continued to grow and we hired more staff we began selling off some of the properties we had been holding and making some decent profit. We dabbled in renovating and flipping houses, which was a whole new world we had to learn. We also purchased an 18-unit rental property and built our portfolio to over 90 units.

This time period was hard on us and we went through a lot of ups and downs. We took a vacation to Greece and Italy for a month. In that time we also moved offices and purchased a home that was a fixer upper. Trying to hire and train multiple people and having them slip through the cracks was wearing us out. Listen on as we talk about how we realized it was time to make some serious changes.

Give yourself permission to live your life differently As ironic as it is with us working in real estate, we did not like being homeowners. We hated the maintenance, the work and inconvenience of it. So we took a huge step, ignored what anyone else might think, and sold our home. From here on out, any time we haven’t been satisfied with our environment, we move somewhere else. At this point in time we found a place right behind our office that made life so much more convenient.

We learned a lot about what worked for us and what didn’t. Most of all, we learned that we didn’t have to fit into a box someone else had created for us. But we didn’t know what that meant for us yet. Ray was working all the time and I was home with our 4-month-old daughter. Despite not being involved in the everyday work of the business, I still heard about the ups and downs every single day. The business was no longer serving us, but we were serving it. Keep listening as we discuss our biggest wins, paind, and what we’ve learned!

Our transition into a simpler lifestyle where we found clarity We decided to transition out of our business as it was—we needed to let it go. We began to sell off rental properties and slowly let staff go as we eventually closed down our office. We made more of a profit on our work during this time closing this business then in the years we had been running it! We knew it was the right decision for us in this season.

After the business was no longer consuming every bit of our lives, we realized how much we had let ourselves go. Our personal development had waned, and our relationship wasn’t as strong as it could be. Our journey towards clarity really began here. We began investing in mastermind groups and reclaimed our health. Continue listening as we talk about another move, “spring cleaning”, and transitioning into a better business for us.

The #1 reason why money does matter The growth of our business eventually led us to the realization that training and managing people just wasn’t for us. So we transitioned into our loan business, which gives us steady monthly cash-flow and more time to do the things we want. We believe that time is our most valuable asset and we are now able to use our time towards things like creating this podcast. Our passion lies in helping other people, especially couples, and somewhere along the way we had lost the ability to do so.

Now we have time to take some of the money we’ve earned and invest it towards worthy pursuits. So often, people say that money doesn’t matter. But it does. Money allows us to make an impact, and leave a legacy for our daughter. Listen to the remainder of this episode as we talk about some ways we’ve recently used our newfound time and money, and encourage you to take steps to start living the life you desire.

Resources & People Mentioned * Find a Mastermind Group * Essentialism: the Disciplined Pursuit of Less by Greg McKeown * Unique Ability 2.0 by Catherine Nomura, Julia Waller, et. al. * The Dan Sullivan Question by Dan Sullivan

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So many of you have asked for more details on how the two of us got started, so we are dedicating the next two episodes to our story—and how we built our business from the ground up. We’re gonna share more about our history, how we met, and the hustle it took to get our business rolling. You’ll definitely want to tune in and listen to this episode of Both on Board!

Highlights From Our Conversation * [1:00] Ray’s Story * [7:54] Christy’s Story * [12:50] Our ‘Date with Destiny’ trip to Australia * [16:25] We started working together in November 2011 * [18:26] Season 1 of Christy and Ray: challenges and wins * [23:18] Biggest win, biggest pain, and the biggest lesson learned * [27:00] Investing in an office and creating separation between work and home * [34:00] Using personality tests to start to separate responsibilities * [37:30] Getting our financials in order

Ray’s roots in life and business I was born and raised in Miami, a true Florida boy. I was recruited to work in GE right out of college and found myself in Connecticut where I saw snow for the first time in my life. Every 6 months of working there I was shuffled into a new role, which constantly kept me on my toes and learning. During this time I saved as much as possible, and also invested in my first real estate deal—where I ended up losing $60,000. Despite this setback, I stuck with real estate and even connected with my first partner in the business. Continue listening as we talk about my move back to Miami and how I earned enough money to retire for two years when I met and started dating Christy.

Christy’s story of life and personal development I had what I considered the perfect life for someone in their early 20’s. I was a Psychology major in college and after I graduated I started working as a 4th-grade teacher. I made enough money to support myself and was perfectly happy. When Ray and I met and first started dating, I 100% thought he was living off of family money. When I realized everything he had was earned through hard work and grit, I took notice. He gave me Tony Robbins Personal Power CD’s and he didn’t push me to listen to them, simply encouraged me. I took the initiative and listened, and got hooked—completely opening up my world to the idea of personal development.

Personal Development as a catalyst in our relationship Ray and I began attending personal development conferences together and I dove into multi-level marketing while still teaching. For anyone looking to get started as an entrepreneur I highly recommend this as a springboard into the industry. It allows you the opportunity to build something from the ground up while gaining first-hand experience. It’s hard work, but it can be so rewarding on a personal and business level.

In 2011, Ray and I took a huge leap of faith and traveled to Australia together for 21 days to attend a Tony Robbins ‘Date with Destiny’ seminar. During this time, it dawned on me that I no longer wanted to teach. The entrepreneurial spirit had taken over, and I knew I couldn’t keep splitting my life between teaching and building a business. People thought we were crazy. But this is where we truly started living life on our own terms. Keep listening as we talk about how we could afford 3 weeks in Australia and how it catapulted change in our lives.

Building a business where you are both on board There are moments in your life where you have a realization, one where there is no turning back to the way things were before. Experiences that are life-altering. In 2011, I moved into Ray’s apartment where we began building and working on our business for the next two years. There were times where we wouldn’t see our cars for weeks straight and spent the majority of our time in front of our computers. We would send out offers on hundreds of bank-owned properties, and would maybe get an offer accepted on one.

Everything changed when we made almost $40,000 on a deal that we had invested in.

We realized that we didn’t have to settle for small paychecks anymore. We also realized it was time to invest in an office space and building some separation between personal life and work life. We paid more rent for this office space then we did for our apartment. But it was the best investment we could’ve made because it forced us to play a bigger game and hustle on a higher level. Listen to the rest of the episode as we talk about our heart behind our work and how we learned what was or wasn’t working--and how to fix it.

Resources & People Mentioned * Tony Robbins Personal Power CD’s * Tony Robbins Date with Destiny Event

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From the very launch of this podcast, our goal has been to help you reach a point where you can design the life you want to live—and actually start living life on your own terms. From personal development to managing your health and fitness, we want to make sure we give you the tools we’ve used so you can make your own way. Listen to this episode as we share our heart and some of the hardest thing we’ve had to overcome.

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:55] Living Life on your terms * [3:00] Become aware of your limiting beliefs * [6:50] You’re only as strong as your weakest link * [8:55] Uncover your limiting beliefs and devise steps to overcome them * [13:05] Is social media influencing how you live your life? * [17:45] Don’t copy someone else thinking they have it all figured out * [20:15] What is going to make me happy in this season

Become aware of your personal limiting beliefs—so you can overcome them A limiting belief is something that constrains you from taking action, in some cases because you believe you aren’t good enough. It’s the voice in your head that holds you back, whispering that you don’t have what it takes. That you need to protect yourself. But if you want to take action and you truly desire to, it’s time to shut down that internal dialogue.

Don’t live your life by limiting the scope of what you are capable of!

Ray and I take some time at the end of our day to communicate about the things that have been bouncing around in our head. We find that by opening up to each other we can laugh some things off. Sometimes we can’t believe the power we’ve let those beliefs hold over us. Listen on as we talk about creating a safe space to be open with each other and lay out some examples.

To begin living life on your own terms you must stop caring what other people think A huge thing I’ve struggled with is allowing myself to care about what other people think about me. Are they watching the decisions I’m making and judging me? What do they think of my parenting? I believed that if I acted in a way that pleased others it was caring for them. In reality, I was trying to cover up who I was. And you know what? I needed to be my authentic self. I can care for other people and still live my best life. Keep listening to this episode as cover some ways we overcame personal hurdles to be better versions of ourselves.

Don’t compete with or compare yourself to others When we first launched our business and started along this whole process, social media wasn’t flourishing like it is today. It didn’t influence decisions we made, nor was everything we did available for the world to see. As we spend more time on social media, it’s important to realize that you are not in competition with the people you see. You can’t compare your journey to theirs. Who knows what they go through on a daily basis outside of social media.

All you see is a snapshot of who they are.

Don’t let that snapshot make you feel lesser. Don’t follow the crowd. Remember, designing your perfect life is about doing things on your own terms. You can’t measure yourself using someone else’s ruler. Learn to be confident in who you are, because nobody else can be you. Continue on with us as we talk about learning to trust yourself and truly embrace who you are.

Make sure you are living your own dream—not someone else's We just want to expound on the social media piece a little more. Not only do you not want to compare your life with others, but you don’t want to lose sight of what your dreams are. It’s so easy to go on Instagram and look at all these beautiful photos of people living the most amazing story. Each individual has their own dreams and goals, many of which can align with their significant others.

So in order to live life the way you desire, look back on our perfect day exercise. As you accomplish a goal or a dream, evaluate it—is it what you truly wanted? If not, move on and don’t force yourself to live in a space where you aren’t happy. Listen to the rest of the episode as we talk about how to take these ideas and test them out and make them work for you. We just want to help equip others to live the life they desire like we have been able to do. Hopefully, you find value in some of the tools and suggestions we provide!

Resources & People Mentioned * The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz * Becoming Supernatural by Dr. Joe Dispenza

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Let’s face it, sometimes there are days when we have to master our emotions so they don’t seep into the world around us. Either you “wake up on the wrong side of the bed” or a mistake is made that you are beating yourself up about. Perhaps a decision you made in your relationship or business is leaving you agitated. Whatever the reason, emotions are hard—and even harder to control. Listen to this episode as we talk about what to do when your emotions get the best of you.

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:50] What do you do when crap hits the fan * [3:36] Identify what is causing you to be off * [7:25] Recognize there are gonna be bad days * [12:00] Establish a “reset button” in your relationship * [13:00] Personal examples of what we have been through * [14:34] Things you can do to get back on track * [15:40] The law of attraction: don’t put your problems on a pedestal * [18:45] Change how you look at the problem and change how you look at your partner * [23:15] When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change * [25:00] Resources we recommend

What do you do when the crap hits the fan? Everyone has those days, right? Where, for whatever reason, we are cranky and irritable and can’t seem to shake our foul mood. Sometimes we are at each other's throats. No one is proud of it but it happens. So what do you do about it so it doesn’t negatively affect your relationship?

Take some time and identify what is off.

You know when you’re off, so take the time to figure out why. Did you oversleep? Did you forget to pay a bill? Whatever the problem, it’s important to identify the issue. Don’t let an external issue become an internal conflict that affects how you treat each other.

It’s okay to not be okay—but don’t wallow in it Just let that sink in. It’s okay to not be okay. But you need to confront your emotions and deal with them. Whatever fear, guilt or shame that is motivating you to beat yourself up needs to be let go. If you lash out at your spouse because of your own inner frustration, apologize immediately. Acknowledge that you’re in a bad state of mind and that you will work through it. Ray likes to say “catch the monster while it’s small, don’t let it eat the whole city”.

Likewise, extend grace to your husband or wife if they’re having one of these days. Odds are they are beating themselves up over whatever is happening internally, and they don’t need you to build on those emotions. We have a couple of tools we utilize: our own personal reset button and “I can’t stand myself”. Continue listening as we explain what those mean to us!

Do something to clear your head and be the master of your emotions So once you’ve established that you need an attitude adjustment, it’s time to take action. Ray likes to go to the gym, take a walk, and meditate to work through his feelings. I prefer to do yoga or go outdoors and spend some time walking in the grass barefoot—it’s an incredible way to ground yourself. Whatever we do, we change up our environment and try and get a fresh perspective.

Another tool we both 100% agree on is to practice gratitude. Sure, I forgot to pay some bills on time, but we have the money to pay those bills. It won’t affect our credit because it never happens. Do not focus all of your attention on your problem, but focus on being thankful. Listen as we talk about some very personal stories and what we do to practice gratitude.

When you change the way you look at things the things you look at change This quote, most often attributed to Dr. Wayne Dyer, is a mantra we live by. We choose to no longer put our problems on a pedestal. Instead, we shift our focus to what we are thankful for and all those problems seem so small and insignificant. As we begin to shift our focus, the negative emotions begin to fade away as we choose to embrace joy.

Ultimately, happiness and fulfillment is an internal game. When we focus on our self-care and navigating away from those harmful emotions, we also grow closer together. We are both on board with this marriage and this business, and that means overcoming and mastering our emotions so we can be the best versions of ourselves. Listen to the rest of this episode as we cover some invaluable tools you can use in your relationship.

Resources & People Mentioned * Subscribe to our newsletter for the "7 Game Changers” PDF * Les Brown “Getting Unstuck” YouTube Video * Tony Robbins: Learn How to Make Tough Decisions * Tony Robbins: Ask Better Questions

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Have you hit a realization that you and your spouse may be growing apart? Do you feel a lack of connectedness and closeness? We saw this come into play in our relationship when life circumstances drastically changed and we had our daughter. Christy needed to focus on being a mom, and I began to focus on our business. But soon our separate paths led to our individual needs not being met and we felt stalled in our relationship. On today’s episode, we talk about some of our struggles, how we realized what was happening, what we did to change—and how you can too.

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:50] You are either growing together or growing apart * [6:00] The grass will be green where you take care of it * [10:45] Growth always comes in seasons * [13:30] Utilize your network of mentors or people “who have been there” * [18:00] Take small consistent steps towards change * [23:35] Allow yourself personal growth in order to give to others * [25:30] How to get back on track & resources we’ve found helpful

You’re either growing together or you’re growing apart We found ourselves in a place where we had taken on needed roles, but let it go too far. Christy’s role as a mother overcame every part of her life. She couldn’t go anywhere or do anything without always thinking about our daughter. I was enveloped in work, and it seemed to follow me everywhere. We hit the realization that we were not happy. Instead of being close, we found ourselves drifting apart. We quickly decided that we were all in this marriage and that it was time to make some changes. Listen to this episode as we cover some of the huge steps we took to turn our marriage around.

The grass will be greener where you take care of it So many people think that if they just get out of an unhappy and unfulfilling relationship, everything will be solved. That isn’t how it works. You have 100% of the responsibility for yourself in your relationship. If you aren’t happy, odds are that a lot of it is stemming from your own lack of personal growth. Another issue that is commonly brought up is that your wants and needs aren’t being met.

So what do you do if you don’t want to give up on your relationship?

Clarify your wants and your needs with each other. Acknowledge where you are. Then, find a way to prioritize each other. It’s really important not to place blame on each other, so take responsibility. Start with clarification and communication about your issues and while being completely honest. Listen on as we talk about what we did to nurture our relationship and how it impacted every part of our lives.

Seek wisdom and advice from those who have walked in your shoes You aren’t the only ones who have ever been stalled in your relationship. Many couples have been there and many didn’t make it through—and got divorced. You've already established you want to stay committed. You’re taking steps to work on your relationship. So what else can you add to your arsenal of tools?

Reach out and seek mentorship from someone who you trust and can help you through the hard times. Utilize your network of close friends or seek out a marriage counselor. A huge thing I did was join a mastermind group. Whatever you decide to do as you work on your marriage, make sure you’re also committing to your personal development. Keep listening as we share more strategies we implemented.

Take small and consistent steps in the direction of change We found that we let ourselves get lost in our daughter and in our business. We forgot to keep taking care of ourselves, and subsequently caring for each other. So focus on fixing and developing you. Read books, exercise, seek out mentors, change your peer group. Take small steps and be consistent. Fill your cup so that you can begin to fill others.

Then let those changes spill over into your relationship. Find ways to spend time together. If you do things separately, come together and share what you’ve learned. Go to seminars and learn together—we’ve found this to be helpful in our growth together. Remember, you have the freedom to leave your relationship and only you have the freedom and the power to change it and grow closer. Listen to the rest of the episode as we talk about more steps to get back on track and some helpful resources.

Resources & People Mentioned * Find a Mastermind Group * Tony Robbins on Peer Elevation * Wheel of Life Resource

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Whether you realize it or not—your health and personal fitness have a major impact on your well-being and your relationship. Are you struggling with exhaustion, headaches, and an inability to focus? Has your weight crept up over the last few months or years? Are nutrition and exercise even part of your daily life? Listen to this episode of Both on Board as we talk about the importance of health and fitness and how it impacts every area of your life.

Highlights From Our Conversation * [1:05] The importance of health and fitness * [4:25] Navigating different goals and interests * [6:46] Communicate and really hear what your spouse is saying--they aren’t judging * [9:10] The importance of self-care * [11:15] Celebrate and acknowledge the small wins * [13:30] It’s about a lifestyle change, not a diet * [15:36] your partners' delays are not denials * [18:58]Communication plays a huge role * [20:50] every outcome is determined by the energy it’s created from * [23:20] health and fitness allows you to live life to the fullest * [25:00] Change comes in seasons

The quality of your life is directly related to the quality of your health We are firm believers that if you don’t have your health, you don’t have anything. Take a moment and be really honest with yourself. Do you feel good about where your health is today? Are there changes you could make that would positively impact your daily life? Ray has always been obsessed with fitness, and focusing on it has never been an issue for him. For me, it is truly a love-hate relationship. I had to lean on my life vision and goals for myself as motivation. My desire is to be toned, and Ray wants to strive to be an elite athlete. Continue listening as we talk about the importance of supporting each other when we have different goals and the impact of that support.

Celebrate the small wins you’re making towards your personal fitness goals If you’ve established that you’re at a point where a shift towards a healthier lifestyle is needed, take baby steps. You can’t make immediate changes in your life and expect them to stick—they need to become habits. In order for something to become a habit, you need to make slow changes and be consistent every single day. So what do you do when you reach those small goals you create for yourself? Celebrate! The goal is to build something sustainable that can impact your life from here on out. Listen to the episode as we continue to discuss how to implement change and what we have personally done to build a healthier lifestyle.

Emphasize accountability: tell the truth in love with compassion We all know how emotional this topic is, and sometimes we have internal struggles that we are working to overcome. But it is SO important to build trust with yourself and learn to keep the promises you’ve made to yourself. If you see your spouse struggling, ask them why. Remind them why their commitment is important. Do it from a place of love and not judgment.

Be prepared for your spouse to help keep you accountable too.

This is a two-way street. You need to own your mistakes and part of that is being able to fully listen when your spouse has feedback. Even if you don’t want to hear it, know that they care about your goals enough to risk how you feel about them in that moment. Continue listening as we emphasize the importance of communication and accountability.

Take Charge of your personal fitness and live life to the fullest It boils down to this—are you able to be fully present and enjoy every part of your life? Is poor health impacting your joy and fulfillment? It’s time to step up, take charge, and lead your family by example. Set your own terms for what you want your health to be! Remember, you are designing your life and your future. If one person steps up and makes changes, it is so much easier for your spouse to follow suit and also commit to a healthier lifestyle. You need to prioritize your health. Listen to the rest of the episode as we talk about our priorities, and how they have changed in different seasons of our life.

Resources & People Mentioned * 75HARD: A 75 Day Tactical Guide by Andy Frisella * MFCEO Podcast by Andy Frisella

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Your money mindset is likely ingrained in you from childhood into adulthood. Whether it is positive or negative, we all have some sort of perception of money that bleeds into our marriage and business. In this episode of Both on Board we cover what our money mindsets were, how we’ve worked through them as a couple and removing the emotion from financial decision making.

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:50] 50% of marriages end in divorce over money issues * [7:53] Money doesn’t change you—it just exposes you to who you already are * [10:18] Sit down and look at what is really important * [12:24] One thing we do differently: delay gratification * [16:00] Money from a spiritual standpoint * [19:55] Money is an emotional subject but does not solve your problems * [23:47] The more money you have the more you can give * [26:28] How we track our money/finances * [29:10] What is coming up for you around money? * [34:53] Take ownership of your spending and be accountable

50% of marriages end in divorce—and the statistics are even higher among entrepreneurs Some could say that instead of money being “the root of all evil” it is “the root of all divorce”. Too often, couples enter a marriage having completely different mindsets about money and what it means to them. Ray and I had very different relationships with money—I lived paycheck to paycheck and thought I was doing fine just getting by. Ray was a saver, hoarding every bit of money he earned and constantly pushing me to do the same. He viewed money as something that was scarce and that you always needed more of. I enjoyed my spending and never thought it was a problem. Listen on as we talk about discovering our different mindsets, and how that led us to have a better marriage and business relationship.

Money doesn’t change you, it just exposes you to who you already are So many people associate money with problems in their family—arguments over never having enough, how it’s being spent, and lack of saving. Too often those arguments stay negative, and the conversation is never constructive. When your view of money is colored by negativity, sometimes you err on the side of just earning enough to provide for your family and label it as good enough. What people don’t realize is that you don’t have to put money on a pedestal. Having money doesn’t change who you are. It can enable you to better care for your family and enable you to give more freely. Listen to this episode as we talk about having a more positive relationship with money and focusing on what it does for you.

Make your money mindset work for you Obviously, there are some very practical things you can do on a daily basis to be better stewards of your money. You need to cut some senseless spending from your life in order to focus on saving for what you want to experience. Are you spending $5 on coffee every day when you could make it at home? Are you mindlessly shopping at your favorite stores and buying things because they’re a “good deal”? Sit down with each other, and commit to having a conversation about finances without drama. Don’t allow yourself to get emotional, don’t point fingers, and do ask the hard questions. Keep listening as we talk about how we track our money, where we are open with it, and how we keep each other accountable.

Price is what you pay value is what you get We recommend focusing your time and energy on what you have in abundance and not what you’re lacking. You work hard, take action, and know that things will fall into place as you’re faithful with what you have. It all boils down to this point: what is the value I’m getting from what I’m spending my money on? Is it enriching my life and my families? Are we traveling, experiencing the world, and being exposed to people with similar mindsets? Value should not be attributed to how much you spent on something, but whether or not it enriched your life in a positive manner.

While we all highly value financial freedom and not being in want, eventually “making money” can no longer be your end goal. What do you do when you’re successful, making a decent living, and you can pay for the experiences you want in life? Listen to the remainder of the podcast as we round out ways to shift your money mindset and begin to discuss it constructively—and then taking the next step.

Resources & People Mentioned * Secrets of the Millionare Mind by T. Harv Ecker * Money and the Law of Attraction by Esther Hicks and Jerry Hicks * Tony Robbins

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Commitment and consistency as entrepreneurs are some of the most powerful tools you can utilize as you work together. You need to build a clear vision for your future, develop self-awareness and establish roles in your business. Then, you invest your time and be consistent in pouring into your vision. In this episode of Both on Board we talk about moving beyond instant gratification and fully committing your time and energy to your business.

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:55] The power of commitment and being intentional * [8:55] Support and understand each other * [12:50] Invest time now to obtain the freedom you desire later * [17:35] You invest to reach your vision * [21:20] Life happens in seasons * [24:40] How we figured out our gameplan * [28:35] continue to develop your personal development * [31:00] The power of consistency

Be fully committed to the life you are designing When Christy and I first decided to dive into this business together, she quit her teaching job. She didn’t take a leave of absence and didn’t have a backup plan—she believed in what we were doing enough to fully commit. There’s no plan B as an entrepreneur! If you don’t believe in your vision enough to fully commit to it, it’s not worth pursuing. Listen to this episode as we discuss our life lessons and the ways we fully committed ourselves to be entrepreneurs.

Clarity and commitment work hand-in-hand as you invest to reach your vision We’ve talked about “The Perfect Day” exercise and having a clear picture of what you want for your future. So now you have to think about what it’s going to take to build your life and business to that point. What do you need to commit to daily, weekly, monthly to reach your goals? What does this truly look like on a daily basis?

Now is the time to come together and focus on the commitments you’ve made to each other personally and in your business. Set your vision and your mindset: work hard now, and delay gratification so you can have financial security and freedom down the road. Listen on as we talk about what this looks like in our lives.

Invest your time for a season to build a future with the freedom you desire When you first dive-in to building a life and a business together, it requires all of your time and energy. In the “spring” season of our business, we were very strategic in planting seeds. We invested so much of our lives to building this business together, taking one step at a time. Don’t allow yourself to be stuck in “analysis paralysis”—keep making strides forward, and little-by-little you will experience growth. Continue listening as we talk about the seasons we’ve gone through in our life so far and how we saw the fruits of our labor unfold.

Developing Commitment and Consistency in your business through personal self-discipline We believe that if you are not consistent with self-discipline you cannot be consistent in your relationship or your business. It’s SO important to continue investing in your personal development. You need to find ways to focus yourself and show up at the highest level you can—every single day. In the rest of the episode, we cover the power of consistency and resources we’ve found instrumental to our personal success in this area.

Resources & People Mentioned * The Compound Effect by Darren Hardy * Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell * Miracle Morning by Hal Elrod

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On our journey to help you design a life and a business together it’s important to focus on developing clear and consistent communication. We believe clear communication leads to a more efficient and rewarding collaboration. In this episode of Both on Board we cover some of our favorite tools for learning self-awareness and how it will strengthen your relationship.

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:55] Move from clarity to collaboration starting with Communication * [4:35] Recognize your own gifts, don’t envy your spouses * [6:00] Overcome the fears you have about working together * [7:55] Self-awareness tests to use * [11:25] The “Roles and the Lanes” * [16:30] What it really means to collaborate * [21:20] Develop curiosity about each other * [24:50] learn your triggers and how to overcome them

Develop an awareness of the filters you use to see each other When you enter into a relationship with another person, you bring with you a lifetime of different “filters”. You see the world a certain way based on the environment you grew up in and different influences along the way. If we aren’t careful, we can find ourselves using these lenses in a destructive way. We can look at each other’s strengths but see them as weaknesses because they don’t align with who we are. Listen to this episode as we discuss how we saw each other in the early days of our relationship and how to combat those negative filters.

Use self-awareness tests as a building block to clear communication Do you know what your strength and weaknesses are? Do you struggle with a clear sense of who you are? If you don’t have a deeper understanding of yourself and how you see the world, it can truly be difficult to communicate well. We advocate for using the different tests available to you because they genuinely helped us in our relationship and business. They focus you and give you a CLEAR picture of how to move forward in your life. Listen as we discuss how these tests have personally impacted us and moved our relationship to the next level.

Why you should embrace the “Stay in your Lane” mentality Once you take some of these tests and have a clearer picture of your strengths and weaknesses, come together and pour over your results. As you gain a better understanding of each other, you can develop and designate different roles in your personal lives AND your business relationship. Once you have your designated “lanes” in place a true collaboration begins to form. If you are better equipped in one area, own your role and allow your significant other to own there’s.

Start finding ways to stop stepping on each other’s toes!

If you honor each lane you’ve set 100% you begin to build trust in each other. The goal is to produce a collaboration where you each have defined roles that you’re passionate about. Listen on as we discuss what some of our roles are and how it’s only bought us closer together.

Utilize these assessments to foster a continued curiosity about each other Relationships should never be static and unchanging. As you grow together, you need to learn more about each other. These tests are a great baseline for starting conversations. Why do you believe what you believe? How do your filters differ from each other? What things from your childhood influence the way you see the world?

We’ve stated before that your spouse is your best personal development coach—so own that role. Laugh with each other, compliment each other, be compassionate, and never stop striving to be their greatest fan. The more you understand about yourself, the more you can learn to understand each other and build the epic life you’ve dreamt of together. In the remainder of this episode, we talk about what this has looked like for us and some more great resources to build clear communication in your relationship.

Resources & People Mentioned * The Kolbe Test * DiSC Personal Assessment Tool * The Strengthsfinder 2.0 Assessment * Wealth Dynamics Test * The Mastery of Love by Don Miguel Ruiz * The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman

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Do you have a clear and detailed life vision for your future? Or are you stuck operating within the familiarity of the past, doing things as you’ve always done? Does your dream for your future align with your significant others? We are Ray and Christy and today we talk about “The Perfect Day” Exercise and how to leverage it to work for your life and family.

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:45] How “The Perfect Day” exercise impacted us and why you should do it. * [4:25] The story of the two thoroughbred horses * [7:10] “The Perfect Day” exercise basics * [10:20] Focus on the WHAT and the WHY * [12:00] Make a vision board (movie, powerpoint, some type of visual) * [15:00] Examining the “Two E”s of what you want for yourself and your family * [18:50] Give yourself a taste of the life you want

The basics of “the perfect day” exercise “The Perfect Day” exercise is a simple tool that we love and we believe can truly work for you. Grab a piece of paper or your laptop and write out what your perfect day would look like—from the moment you wake up to the moment you fall asleep—and everything in-between. Don’t be practical. Don’t be rational. Spill out your dreams on paper. This is when you need to be detailed and specific. Listen to the podcast as we talk about questions to ask yourself to help you clearly visualize what your life vision is.

Think BIG and dream BIG with your life vision—everything else will fall into place As you’re writing out your vision of a perfect day, focus on the WHAT and the WHY. Dream about what you want and nail down the why behind it. Allow yourself to think and dream BIG—there are no limits. You’re going to live your life on your own terms. Build something you will be proud of and allow you to live every day to the fullest.

Not only is it important to nail down your perfect day, but it’s also important to share that with your partner. You may have different dreams and goals for your life, but you’ll find some overlap that you can use to build your future together. Continue listening to this episode to find out how we track our individual and shared visions and how we have watched some of our dreams come true.

The two E’s: What experiences and exposure do you want for your family? As you’re building your perfect day into your perfect life, think about the magic moments that you want to experience. You can plan on purchasing your dream car or the house you’ve always desired. But also focus on the two E’s:

Exposure: What do you want your family exposed to? Where do you want them to live and experience daily life? Do you want to spend your days on the beach as we do?

Experiences: Dream about where you want to travel and what you want to see. Think about not only where you want to go, but how you want to experience it.

Listen to this episode as we cover some things we’ve experienced, and how we decided where to live based on what we wanted our family to be exposed to.

Let your life vision drive your future In the beginning, we went over our perfect day with each other every morning and every evening. We did this until it was ingrained in us. As our dreams and goals became a part of our daily existence, the how and when began to fall into place. The vision we built together is becoming the life we live together. In the remainder of the episode, we talk about practical ways you can get a taste of your perfect day as you begin to live the life you’ve designed.

Resources & People Mentioned * Tony Robbins: Magic Moments * “Your Perfect Day” Exercise * Book: Lifeonaire: An Uncommon Approach to Wealth, Success, and Prosperity * Book: Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less by Greg McKeown * The 7 Game Changers for Highly Effective Couples

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What would it be like if you were able to have your ultimate personal development coach available all the time? Think of it - Tony Robbins, Robin Sharma, Brene Brown - what if they were with you 24/7 to help you work out the kinks in your business and sand down your rough edges? Would you like that? How far would you be able to grow and go if that were true?

We are here to tell you that there’s no question that all of those people are great - but if you are one half of an entrepreneurial couple, you already have a personal development coach who is better than any of those people. It’s your partner.

We are Ray and Christy and we have been working together in business since 2011. We’ve run 3 businesses together and have decided to create our podcast - Both On Board - because of the sheer joy we’ve found in working together. We hope you’ll join us to hear our lessons learned, how we create a thriving life as an entrepreneurial couple, and more.

Highlights From Our Conversation * [0:47] The reasons behind our new podcast: the way people react to us working together * [2:52] Christy’s story: from teaching 4th grade to co-founding 3 businesses * [5:48] Looking at your partner as the ultimate personal development coach/tool * [8:40] Our 3 C framework: Clarity - Collaboration - Commitment * [14:31] The importance of quality questions * [17:30] The quality questions section will be part of every episode

Your partner really IS your ultimate personal development coach and tool It’s true - your partner has the potential to be your ultimate personal development tool. Why? Because they know you better than anyone else. They are able to see your strengths and encourage you in them - and they notice your areas of weakness and encourage you in those as well.

They are also able to provide a level of accountability like nobody else when it comes to your business pursuits. So let them. You’ll be at the top of your game more often if you work together to keep each other on track.

As you move forward together, you’ll find yourself moving forward faster - but only IF you learn how to work together in a healthy and productive way. On this podcast, we’ll be sharing the tools, techniques, and tips we’ve learned to take your life, business, and relationship to the next level.

Our 3 C framework helps us stay on track as a business couple Working together we’ve found great joy - but it’s not without its challenges. There are many areas where we experience the potential for conflict, disagreement, and even stepping on each others’ toes. How do we avoid those things? Not perfectly, that’s for sure - but we have developed what we call our “3 C Framework.” It’s a way for us to focus on the three areas that help us stay aligned with each other…

Clarity
Collaboration
Commitment

In this episode, we introduce you to the basic concept behind each of these “C”s and give you a taste of how we’ll use those concepts in the episodes to come. Take the time to listen now!

Why couples can be the best accountability and encouragement for each other Of all the people in the world, we know that WE are each others’ greatest fan. That’s a benefit that we want to take advantage of. Nobody will care as we do. Nobody else will be willing to speak the encouragement we need when we need it or the hard truth we need to hear as each of us will for the other. Of course, we have to express compassion and care as we do, and we’re happy to do that for each other, but we care too much about each other to let things stay as they are. We want to grow and we want growth for each other.

That’s why couples are the best accountability and encouragement for each other. When you apply that truth to business, you’re looking at an unbeatable team. We are each other's’ best personal development coach and fan - all rolled into one.

We invite you to listen to this episode. You’ll hear our hearts for business, our hearts for each other, and our desire to help you make the most of your business and relational partnership. And you’ll get a taste of all the good things to come.

Resources & People Mentioned * Tony Robbins

Connect With Ramon and Christy * www.BothOnBoard.com * Both On Board on Instagram: @BothOnBoard * Ray’s Instagram - @OfficialRamonGonzalez * Christy;s Instagram - @ChristyRisco * Facebook - Ramon Gonzalez * Facebook - Christy Risco

Both On Board: Recent Episodes

Ramon Gonzalez, Christy Risco