THE Amicable Divorce Expert with Judith Weigle: Recent Episodes
Judith Weigle
THE Amicable Divorce Expert, Judith Weigle, shares her insights and experiences in divorce mediation and communication, helping thousands of couples accomplish the near impossible, amicable divorces.
In this episode 262 you will learn the following:
- Maria’s journey as a Step Daughter
- Maria’s journey as a Step Parent
- Maria’s journey adopting her Step Daughter
- What to look for in a potential spouse who has a biological child from another person
stepchild #stepparent #adoption #podcast #divorcepodcast #amicabledivorce
Maria Natapov Bio
Stepparenting Expert and Trusted Advisor to Divorce Professionals, Financial Advisors, and Parenting Coaches Maria offers a caring and playful coaching approach where clients feel energetically held and empowered to joyfully and confidently blend their families.
Through her signature 4-step energy-focused process combined with Rapid Resolution modality, Maria helps families transition from chaos to harmony. She enables stepparents to strengthen their values, foster partner alignment, create trust with stepchildren, and enhance community with birth families by building on their existing skills, experiences, and strengths.
Maria has helped numerous blended families foster more harmonious family dynamics through her VIP Stepparenting Breakthrough support model and her podcast, Synergistic Stepparenting. To learn more about how to work with Maria, visit her website at SynergisticStepparenting.com.
Email: Maria@SynergisticStepparenting.com
Phone number: (617) 419-0878
Website: www.SynergisticStepparenting.com
Podcast: www.SynergisticStepparenting.com/podcast
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/synergisticstepparenting
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/maria.natapov
In this episode you will learn the following:
- Communication is the key in exercising control in a divorce
- Speaking up for yourself is an ongoing process
- How to keep control in your co-parenting role
communication #control #victim #co-parenting #divorce #mediation #childsupportservices #roleplay #toneofvoice #mediator #lawyer
In this episode, you will learn the following:
- Your emotional attachment to money
- The way in which money defines you; your money type
- The way in which money affects you
- Why your spouse may argue over having to pay child support
- Why your spouse may resist dividing assets
- How you can navigate around your spouse’s resistance to not paying child or spousal support, and resistance to dividing assets
money #emotionalintelligence #wealth #ego #fear #gratitude #childsupport #spousalsupport #alimoney #trust #gratitude #attachmenttomoney #selfimage #moneytype #divisionofassets
Kaki Perdue Biography
Kaki Perdue is a CPA and a CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER™. She spent 12 years as a CPA in public accounting and 6 years as a Chief Financial Officer for a tech company before launching Look Both Ways Financial in 2023. Why financial planning? Kaki strives to meet clients where they are, with no judgment. Kaki is on a mission to teach her clients to feel safe, strong, and secure managing their own money. She embraces the “Less is More” approach to both life and financial planning. Kaki prefers outdoor fun – hiking, skiing, gardening, & camping.
www.lookbothwaysfinancial.com
kaki@lookbothwaysfin.com
(24) Kaki Perdue, CPA, CFP® | LinkedIn
Kaki is also the host of the Look Both Ways Financial podcast – available wherever you find podcasts.
In this episode you will learn the following:
- You are not a failure because you’re getting divorced. Everything we experience in life is a learning lesson. It’s how we change as a result of our experiences that matters.
- If you believe you are the one who eroded the marriage and divorce is now inevitable, you can change the emotional trajectory of the divorce by apologizing. Apologize without putting any blame on your spouse.
- After the apology, change your behavior to whatever it needed to be in the first place.
- If we look at life as a learning experience, and that our learning experiences are growth experiences, we will never be victims. Life will always be fair. Life will be fair because through our trials and tribulations we will accept them as tailor-made growth experiences that can challenge our will to live, test our ability to succeed, and drive us to accomplishments we never fathomed before we were tested.
- Let’s make art out of what we might call failure. Let’s trust the universe that whatever we need for growth will come to us. Let’s align ourselves with truth so that we can see how to change a challenging situation to a new level of understanding of ourselves.
failure #trust #personalgrowth #challenges #apologize #emotionaldivorce #divorce #podcast #divorcepodcast #blame #spouse #amicabledivorce #victim #victimize #success #life #fair #growth
In Episode258 you will learn the following:
- Honesty is good for emotional, physical, mental, and spiritual health.
- Divorce is fraught with dishonesty to mask fear, hurt, and possibly the knowledge that people have knowingly chosen to marry the wrong person.
- Divorce can be the event that forces people to self-correct and turn fear into the most truthful and honest conversation they’ve ever had.
- Once people have the courage to speak honestly, and the commitment to be authentically truthful, their lives are fueled by positive energy and they align with the universe in such a way that everything right for them comes to them.
truth #honesty #authenticity #communication #truthfulness # divorce #marriage #fear #trust #hurt #emotionalhealth #mentalhealth #physicalhealth #spiritualhealth #dishonesty #mediation
In this episode you will learn the following:
- In the world of divorce, communication - what you say and how you say it - either helps or hinders how you and your spouse get through the process.
- The Three Key Elements in successfully handling threatening communication with your spouse:
-
- Listen. Listen without Interrupting. Listen to Learn.
- Ask “Why?”
- Address his/her Reasons for the Threats
- People threaten and become unreasonable because of Fear.
divorce #podcast #divorcepodcast #communication #fear #anger #hurt #marriage #toneofvoice #words #attorney #divorceattorney #trust
In this episode you will learn the following:
- Childhood development starts in the womb and is critically important until age 2 to set the foundation for who your baby can possibly be.
- Your baby is communicating with you through every sound they make. The parents’ role is to communicate back.
- The games parents play with their newborns each have a learning function to them.
- It’s important that parents discuss what is priority to them in how they raise their child before having children.
- Consistency provides a safe and secure environment for children. Each parent’s daily routine is important when there is co-parenting in two households due to divorce.
- Don’t Compete! Each co-parent is different and each co-parent has value in what they can provide to their children.
- The Oliiki app is designed to create daily interactions with children up to 24 months old that explain the developmental skill the baby is learning.
Oliiki is grounded in science. UCL Institute of Education carried out a randomised controlled trial on the Oliiki app and found that parents using the Oliiki app after only 4 weeks had higher parental self-efficacy, (more confident in their parenting) compared to the active control trial. This is significant because high parental self-efficacy is connected with low post-natal depression, low infant mental health issues and high home learning environments.
coparenting #parenting #education #play #communication #divorce #podcast #divorcepodcast #amicabledivorce #prenatalcommunication #childhooddevelopment #Oliikiapp #therapy #consistency #newborns #familytherapy @ClareStead @JenJackson
About Clare SteadClare Stead, Creator and Founder of the Oliiki app is an e-Learning specialist, Education researcher and primary teacher. She is passionate about helping parents and careers build their baby’s brains from conception onwards, so the children reach their full potential and fly. Supporting parents early gives them the confidence to know they’re doing the very best for their baby, developing knowledge and skills in play-based learning for our youngest child helps them ensure they thrive, right from the start.
https://www.linkedin.com/in/clarestead-oliiki/
www.oliikiapp.com
Download the Oliiki app here
https://www.instagram.com/oliiki/
https://www.facebook.com/Oliiki
Oliiki app blurbThe Oliiki app is an app for parents and parents-to-be of babies in the first 1000 days, from conception to two to build their babies brain and spark their parenting confidence one play activity at a time.
Jen Jackson
Jen has accumulated 18 years of experience in the healthcare industry and currently serves as an ambassador for healthy youth development within managed care organizations. Her primary professional focus involves identifying innovative approaches to promote youth’s mental health and effectively communicating product differentiators that impact the health and well-being of members.
Jen initiated her career as a mental health therapist, providing services to children, teenagers, and families in various settings, including acute care, county mental health agency, and private practice. She holds a master’s degree in social work from Temple University and is a Licensed Clinical Social worker in the state of Utah. In 2005, Jen earned credentials as a Registered Play Therapist.
www.linkedin.com/in/jenniferannjackson
jj.jenniferannjackson@gmail.com
In this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert you will learn the following:
- What is behind the co-parenting relationship
- Accepting that there are predispositions to challenges in intimate relationships
- How healthy are any of us in our determinations for the right spouse for us
- What is Fair and Unfair in relationship challenges that confront us
- How to negotiate for money without using the word “fair”
- Parental Alienation Advocates; Family Disappeared Podcast; 12 Step Support Group to help divorcing people self-reflect and assume responsibility for their part in the divorce
- The importance of taking responsibility for their decisions from the choice to marry a certain person, to why the marriage isn’t working out
- Communication is the center piece to a healthy relationship, even a divorced relationship
- It takes two to form a productive relationship
- Parenting without access to the children is a form of being engaged without disrupting the co-parenting relationship
- To determine the Family System issues is one of the most important concerns in helping a co-parenting relationship
- The Family Tree has roots in our growth
communication #coparenting #parentalalienation #relationships #supportgroup #marriage #fair #unfair #FamilyDisappearedPodcast #parenting #guilt #familysystem #12stepprogram #acrimoniousdivorce #Dr.AmyBaker #petcustody #children #adultchildren #mediation #systemicchange
Lawrence Joss Biography
Founder and Director at PA-A.org
Lawrence Joss is a remarkable individual who has spent a lifetime dedicating himself to entrepreneurship, healing, and the service of others. With over three decades of successful entrepreneurship under his belt, Lawrence's journey has taken a profound turn towards supporting and empowering families facing complex challenges in their lives.
Familydisappeared@gmail.com
www.PA-A.org
"I know what I do, but I don't know what I do does"-Solnit
-
familydisappeared@gmail.com
-
https://linktr.ee/lawrencejoss
-
Website: https://parentalalienationanonymous.com/
-
Linkedin - Lawrence Joss
-
Family Disappeared Facebook Group
In this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert, you will learn the following:
- The definitions of anger
- Where anger fits in the seven Stages of Divorce Grief
- Types of Anger
- The importance of therapy and self-reflection to deal with anger.
- The three types of Anger, and what is good anger.
- Examples of using good anger to advance the divorce in a positive way.
- The benefits of being able to control anger.
anger #control #emotions #therapy #communication #communicationskills #communicationtechniques #divorcegrief #badanger #benefitsofanger #forgiveness #acceptance #self-reflection #self-awareness #mediation #lawyers #co-parenting
I. Mediation is an opportunity to compromise. To create a settlement that works for everyone.
-
- It’s not an argument.
- It’s not therapy.
II. People should know the law going into the mediation, and be prepared to work around the law for a compromise that benefits both spouses.
III. Typical Mediation Challenges and How to Handle Them
- Spousal Support (alimony) is a non-starter.
- Separate Property Money (inheritance or savings) became community property money.
- I will only accept a 50/50 custody.
- I’m not addicted to drugs. I just take them recreationally.
- I’ll do what I want on my co-parenting time.
- I’m going to be working less; I’ve been wanting to enjoy life more. (And there’s child and spousal support to pay.)
- If you leave me I’ll take you for everything.
- Lose my last name.
- I have no money.
- What to do when one or both spouses are angry, or one spouse is crying.
mediation #angry #spousalsupport #alimony #childcustody #coparentingschedule #substanceabuse #inheritance #compromise #divorcesettlement #therapy #separateproperty #drugs #anger
In this episode you will learn the following:
- Divorce will unhinge anyone. It’s how people deal with divorce that will benefit them in their divorce and after.
- You need the professionals who you hire for the divorce to care about you.
- You need your soon-to-be former spouse to care about you as a co-parent if you have minor children, and as a negotiator when you work on your divorce settlement.
- How do you get those involved in the divorce to care about you?
- What does it mean to care about yourself first?
- How can the spouse who has been dominant in the marriage change so that that person shows themselves to be caring and concerned about the outcome of the divorce settlement?
- How can the submissive spouse have a different voice negotiating the divorce settlement.
- How do you cause those you’ve hired for the divorce to stop caring about you and only care about the money they’re making?
- How self-care influences better relationships?
- The importance of communication throughout the divorce process.
selfcare #caring #relationships #communication #settlementagreement #negotiations #mediators #mediation #divorcecoach #therapists #coparenting #fear #podcast #divorcepodcast
Spousal Support
- Even though child support is considered more important than spousal support/alimony, spousal support is much harder to deal with both for the spouses and the legal professionals who provide service: Attorneys, Mediators, Divorce Coaches, Document Preparation person, Therapists.
- History of spousal support
- Not gender-driven, while gender plays a huge role when the woman makes more than the man.
- Reasons for spousal support
- How to Prepare for the Mediation for spousal support
- The Negotiation
- Payor Spouse Offer and Responses
- Recipient Spouse Offer and Response
Child Support
- Monthly Amount vs Miscellaneous Expenses. The big wrinkle in child support is the time spent with the children by each parent. The time spent with each parent influences the monthly amount if your state uses a state approved calculator.
- Negotiable Issues
- How to Negotiate
- Don’t disparage the other spouse
- Don’t punish the other spouse by proposing a restrictive schedule if the other parent has been a dialed in parent.
- Make the discussion child-focused. Think of what it will be like for your child to move between houses.
- Come to the mediation to compromise. Otherwise, schedule a Hearing to have a Judge make decisions for you.
- Speak respectfully to your spouse. Lower your tone of voice. Don’t stress out; let your mediator do their job to balance the conversation.
- But don’t let yourself be controlled or bullied.
spousalsupport #alimony #childsupport #childfocused #mediation #divorce #divorcesettlement #lawyer #mediator #specialmaster #divorcecoach #therapist #communication #negotiate #divorcenegotiation #payorspouse #recipientspouse
Episode 250: Can anyone Take the High Road in Divorce? w/Andy Heller, author, businessman
- Define High Road as it pertains to divorce
- What is the crucial hole in the self-help space that you saw with your own divorce, and wanted to fill with your book?
- Topics that aren’t covered a lot in divorce podcasts, and are in your book
- Why shouldn’t one spouse speak badly about the other spouse, especially their mental health assessment of the other spouse?
- When to hold and when to fold in co-parenting?
- The two categories of advice givers
- Injecting Fun into the co-parenting even if you’re the disciplinarian
- How much should you tell your children about the marriage and the reason for divorce?
- Outsourcing parental tasks to spend more quality time with the children
- Receiving gratitude and appreciation from your spouse in the co-parenting give-and-take (Taking the High Road) pg. 210
- Establishing Communication Guidelines (Bill Eddy)
- Hire a Special Master for on-going co-parenting decisions and issues that will come up after the divorce is final
divorce #coparenting #author #podcast #amicabledivorce #divorcepodcast #specialmaster #therapist #childcustody #BillEddy #BIFF #outsource #children #marriage #communicationguidelines #advice #advicegivers #disciplinarian #mentalhealth
ANDY HELLER Biography
While navigating through his own divorce Andy read countless support books to help him navigate through the process. While helpful, Andy identified a crucial hole in the self-help space for men and women navigating through divorce. Andy’s book “Take the High Road, Divorce with Compassion for Yourself and Your Family” is his give back with a stated goal of making the divorce process easier for those who are considering or who are on the divorce path.
Several factors make his book truly groundbreaking. First, Andy brings a businessman’s objective perspective into his counsel. Andy interviewed attorneys, divorcees, therapists, co-parenting counselors, mediators, special masters, and others to arrive at advice and guidance from the leading industry experts. Andy presents the guidance in 46 strategies, tools, and tips that armed with the experience and counsel of these experts, the readers can themselves, hopefully their former spouses, and most importantly their children land in a healthier place in the months and years after the conclusion of their divorces.
https://www.facebook.com/takethehighroadbook
https://www.instagram.com/andyhheller/
www.takethehighroaddivorce.com
andy@takethehighroaddivorce.com
I. Include everything in the marital settlement agreement and refer to the settlement agreement to avoid arguments
II. Avoid Arguments by Looking at all Aspects of the Co-Parenting Relationship
a. Third Party to pick children up from school or after school event
b. Pick-up Late Clause
c. Asking for co-parent’s help in the other co-parent’s house
d. When children don’t want to go to other parent’s house
e. Attending children’s school events, sitting together
f. Introducing new partner to other parent and the children
g. Moving your address to another county, or more than 20 miles away from their school
h. Provisional clause if the payor loses their job
i. Include a meeting with a Parenting Plan Coordinator, or a Divorce Coach, or a therapist who specializes in the co-parent relationship for post-divorce issues pg. 51-52
III. Have a joint bank account for children’s expenses
a. Discuss all activities well ahead of when money has to be provided
b. Keep a minimum balance in the account, and deposit money one month ahead of when needed, if possible
c. Both parents’ names should be on the account
IV. How to Create a Good Co-Parenting Schedule
a. Consider the children’s school and activity schedule first, and then look at how the parents can support that schedule
b. Do not insist on 50/50 time share if you can’t spend time with your child
c. Make child support money secondary to the relationship you’re building with your child. In a mediated settlement agreement you can choose however you want to construct the financial support of your children.
V. Addiction and Behavioral Issues
a. Legal advice
b. Speak up; don’t avoid this discussion just to avoid an argument or to get the divorce finalized
c. Put provisions in place if the substance-challenged spouse waivers on staying clean
In this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert you will learn the following:
- Define Terms under the label of Gifted
- High-functioning Learning Disabled
- Gifted
- Neorodivergent
- Down Syndrome
- Autistic
- Retarded
- Dyslexic
- Communication
- How do children and their parents communicate the children’s needs
- Socializing within a Gifted and Neurodivergent Community
- How do divorcing spouses co-parent if one of the parents is resistant to their child’s needs and diagnosis
giftedchildren #neurodivergent #coparents #coparenting #learningdisabled #dyslexic @autistic #downsyndrome #communication #socialskills #education #legalcustody #diagnosis #resistance #school #RainMan #savant #catalogueing #testing #genetic
Biography for Meghan Bonde
Meghan Bonde is a Tedx speaker, neurodiversity specialist, founder of Team Neurodivergent, and an award-winning speech language pathologist who proudly identifies as Gifted and Neurodivergent. She provides coaching, consulting, courses, and workshops to empower Neurodivergent people to leverage their many strengths and thrive emotionally. Meghan is a passionate dancer, writer, reader, artist, and activist, finding inspiration in nature and her remarkable, Neurodivergent family.
www.teamneurodivergent.com
https://www.facebook.com/teamneurodivergent
https://www.linkedin.com/company/tngifted
In this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert, you will learn the following:
- That emotions will run rampant throughout the divorce.
- How to manage those emotions.
- The benefit in managing those emotions.
- The timing of dealing with those emotions.
- The importance of grieving before filing
- The 7 stages of divorce grief, and the significance of Forgiveness.
emotions #grieving #managingemotions #timing #griefstages #forgiveness #filing #emotionaldivorce #legaldivorce #acceptance
In this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast, you will learn the following:
- Different states have different laws.
- New California law for pet custody: Best Interests of the Pets
https://minellalawgroup.com/blog/how-the-new-pet-custody-law-works-in-california/
- How to Mediate Pet Custody
- Prior ownership
- Attachment between animal and pet owner
- Living arrangements post-divorce
- Dividing animals post-divorce
- Long Distance care
- Ability of each pet owner to be a responsible pet parent
- The financial capability of the pet parents to provide proper care
- Words of Advice
animals #pets #petcustody #petinsurance #petcare #animal laws #divorce #legalseparation #animaltrainers #mediation #grieving #animalgrieving #animalcare #bestinterestsoftheanimals #longdistancecare
In this Episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert, you will learn the following:
- Why Fear is part of Divorce
- The importance of being honest with all aspects of the divorce
- An easy way of researching assets and debts to verify accuracy in your spouse’s Discovery
- Why lying on Income Tax Reports will come back to haunt you
- How Honesty in the financial part of the divorce will benefit everyone
- How being Honest with yourself can benefit the divorce, the co-parenting relationship, and your emotional and physical health
honesty #lie #lying #incometaxreport #childsupport #spousalsupport #alimony #health #divorce #lawyers #forensicaccontants #fear
In this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert, you will learn the following:
- How do you know if you married the wrong person?
- The age at which we marry matters.
- When do you call it quits?
- Is the idea of being a young parent the same now as it used to be years ago?
- When should a married couple have children?
- How should a married couple be aligned before becoming parents?
- Should one spouse share with their spouse that they may have made a wrong decision to marry?
- When you meet someone who fulfills you differently than your husband or wife, what do you do if the marriage has seemed to be fine until that point?
- How do you get out of the victim role in a lopsided power dynamic?
- Do you know who you are and what you bring to the relationship?
- How to reach Forgiveness?
marriage #forgiveness #stagesofgrief #co-parenting #divorce #parents #growth #hope #victim #YinYang #marriagecoach #relationship #relationshipexpert #powerdynamic #psychotherapist #podcast #divorcepodcast #love #happiness @CoachCarrieCohen @JudithWeigle @TheAmicableDivorceExpert
CARRIE COHEN Biography
As a Licensed Psychotherapist for 25 years, a Marriage Coach and Relationship Expert, Carrie Cohen helps couples go from “I want a divorce” to “I didn’t know I could love this deeply.”
Working with clients all over the globe, Carrie has helped over 400 couples heal the stress and trauma that have eroded their relationship, revitalize their love for one another and create a marriage that lasts a lifetime.
In addition to Carrie’s 15+ years of post-graduate training specifically in couples therapy, her approach to her work is holistically based. Carrie is also trained in Polyvagal Therapy, certified in Clinical Hypnotherapy, is a Rapid Transformational Therapy Practitioner, an Integrative Health Coach and a Certified Nutrition Coach.
Email: cc@carriecohencoaching
Website: www.carriecohencoaching.com
IG: @carriecohencoaching https://instagram.com/carriecohencoaching?igshid=OGQ5ZDc2ODk2ZA==
LI: Carrie Cohen https://www.linkedin.com/in/carriecohencoaching
- Forgiveness is one of the 7 Stages of Divorce Grief
- It’s the last stage and the most important one in order to release anger, bring serenity, and become whole again. “Through the act of forgiveness, we cleanse ourselves of the pain and anger that kept us stuck in the past,” Dan Mager, Therapist, in an article in Psychology Today.
- Forgiveness is for the one forgiving. People mistaken forgiveness as an a get-out-of-jail free card that releases the other person from the responsibility of their actions. That’s not it at all. Forgiveness releases the forgiver from the shackles of intense hatred, toxic feelings, and unending bad feelings about the perpetrator of those feelings. These feelings can last years after the divorce is final.
- You’re not done grieving until you’ve forgiven your ex-spouse.
- Read the Harvard article
- Mayo Clinic article
- There are also health benefits attributed to forgiveness, both Mental and Physical. Let’s explore those benefits.
-
- Mental Health Benefits 1. You are no longer angry 2. You are no longer depressed 3. You feel joy again 4. Hope enters your heart 5. Your mind is free to be positive 6. Your spirit sings 7. You feel like loving again
-
Physical Health Benefits (HopkinsMedicine.org)
- Lowers the risk of heart attack
- Lowers blood pressure
- Improves cholesterol levels
- Allow for better sleep
- Lowers blood pressure
- Better immune response 3. From Kaitlin Sullivan for Everyday Health (read) 4. World Forgiveness Day by Rob Horel (read)
- Bottom Line
- Forgiveness isn’t a competition. It doesn’t matter who forgives each other first. It matters that you forgive as soon as you’re able so that you can release the toxicity of anger and become a healthy, happy person again.
- If you’re co-parenting after a divorce, I think forgiveness has to be top of your list.
- But here’s the hardest part of forgiveness, honesty. Maybe you were wrong, too. Consider that you may have known you weren’t making the right decision to marry you’re now soon-to-be former spouse. That’s happened a lot. I watch people in mediation negotiating out of anger, and then eventually tell me, in confidence, that they knew this wasn’t the absolute right person for them, and married them anyway. And now they want to blame their spouse for being who they are. Hmmmm…a tiger doesn’t change their stripes.
-
On this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert, you’ll learn the following:
-
Being a Victim is a Choice, not a Requirement. Why some people choose Victimhood in their marriages. a. Learned behavior from parents’ relationship. b. Feelings of personal insecurity. c. Fear of losing the relationship.
-
How to know when you’re a Victim. a. You give the power of decision-making to your spouse, even when it doesn’t make sense. b. You fear bringing up topics to your spouse, like the finances of the family, to avoid verbal hostility. c. You don’t insist on being part of the income tax filing, and sign them without reading them. d. Your spouse will present a settlement agreement to you to sign before a legal professional is involved for legal advice, or to initiate the filing.
-
How to Change from Victim to Equal Partner in the Divorce Decision-Making a. “I am an equal partner in this relationship and want equal decision-making in the divorce.” b. Once you process and understand why you’ve accepted being a victim, your voice and attitude can change to one of Calm Control. c. You don’t have to be mean, arrogant, or demanding. Bear in mind that it was your choice, consciously or unconsciously, to be submissive in the marital decision-making. More than likely, this submissive position as driven you to the divorce. That’s okay; you’re now exercising control over your own life. Using a calm tone, and words that aren’t offensive, is to your advantage. d. What typically happens once a victim leaves their former role of powerless person, and assumes the role of control, is that there is an over exaggeration of attitude, which starts a fight, and blows everything out of proportion. The controlling spouse will be shocked at seeing a different attitude in their submissive spouse, and will become both defensive and offensive. That’s why it’s so very important to use a calm, soothing voice, and words that are just as calming, too. (give example) BIFF e. A power imbalance has been created and maintained during the marriage. Once the victim wants to change the power imbalance, that will create fear in the mind of the controlling spouse. A calm tone, and a refusal to argue, will minimize the reaction of the controlling spouse. Remember, that there are also issues from the personality make-up, and from the way the controller was raised, that contribute their approach to a marriage. Don’t blame them. Sometimes they don’t realize what they’re doing. They need help, too. f. Lastly, realize that when legal professionals are involved, and after you’ve received legal advice, the professionals will go by the laws of the state, and will be your support system, so to speak, to create the balance that never was, in working with you to craft a divorce settlement.
victim #control #powerimbalance #financialassets #decision-making #incometax returns #divorcelaws #legaladvice #divorcesettlement #insecurity #power #communication #toneofvoice #BIFF #Bill Eddy #words
In this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert, you will learn the following:
-
It’s the words we choose and the tone of voice we use that will give us the strength we need in our communication
-
How not to be verbally bullied
-
How to respond to toxic communication
-
The secret advantage of not engaging in fighting
-
No need to justify yourself in divorce negotiations
-
Less is more in the War of Words
-
BIFF is your toxic communication approach
-
Don’t Threaten Court even if Court is necessary. Just suggest it as a considered resolution.
-
Lay down the rope to stop a verbal tug of war.
-
The goal post can’t move.
communication #bullying #tugofwar #warofwords #fighting #communicationtechniques #BIFF #words #toneofvoice #toxiccommunication #negotiation #court #podcast #divorcepodcast #toxictexts #toxicemails #divorceattorney
-
If you knowingly married the wrong person, admit it in the divorce and correct the record. A. You will then be mediating from a point of authenticity and strength. B. You don’t have to negotiate the settlement outside of the laws of your state, but the voice you will have in the negotiation will be stronger, will not be blaming, but instead will be a voice from truth, and the truth will set you emotionally free. People think that getting more of a settlement than they thought they could get is the reward. I say, “No.” I say the reward is to be unshankled by the veil of dishonesty that covered up the truth of the relationship.
-
There are three divorces: Emotional, Legal and Social A. Go through the grieving before filing B. File with a healed heart C. Your social circle will change with a divorce
-
Don’t try to win your mediator over by bashing your spouse. A. A good mediator will never be swayed by spouse-bashing, but you will put your mediator on guard against you. That means that the mediator has to work extra hard to remain neutral and just work on advancing the conversation, the negotiation, the settlement issues between the spouses.
-
Do not force settlement terms on your spouse. This will make your spouse not trust you, and trust is at stake here. A. Men do this to women more than women do this to men. B. And, men do this to women without receiving counsel from an attorney. C. And it generally seems that the tone, the condition of the relationship, in those instances where a settlement agreement is proposed to the wife, is fragile, not amicable, and fraught with fear. D. Bring in the attorneys, cause that is the only way fear can be diminished.
In Episode 239 of THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast, you will learn the following:
-
How life insurance can protect your child and spousal support payments
-
How life insurance can provide for long-term care financial assistance
-
The security of receiving life insurance for income tax free money
-
The difference between the 529 Plan vs Life Insurance for the children’s colleges
-
LifeHappens.org explains the differences in all types of insurance, to include Disability Insurance, Long-Term Care Insurance, Life and Term Insurance
-
Lots of different ways to use insurance
lifeinsurance #long-termcarepolicy #childsupport #spousalsupport #alimony #disabilityinsurance #protect #plan 529Plan #taxfreemoney #incometax #terminsurance
DINA MABRY BIOGRAPHY
Dina is a trusted resource for life, long-term care, and disability insurance. Being in the industry for over 15 years, Dina has become a respected consultant by creatively finding solutions for estate planning, income replacement and long-term care protection solutions.
Working with over 30+ carriers, she strives to be a reliable expert in her field so clients can make informed decisions and sleep at night knowing they and their families are protected. She is a wife, mother, daughter, sister, and friend.
Dina can be reached at DinaM@BGAinsurance.com or 818-601-3049
www.bgapremierinsurance.com
FB – BGApremierinsurance
IG -BGA_premier_insurance
On this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast, you will learn the following:
-
Divorce Statistics for multiple marriages
-
Why people continue to divorce in multiple marriages
-
Different reasons for divorces
-
How having children changes the marital relationship
-
How working together as a married couple affects the marriage
-
The importance of getting along during divorce, and the rising expense of legal representation
-
Grieving the loss of the marriage is paramount before hiring lawyers and filing for divorce
-
Patterns are formed in how relationships start and should be noted for insight
-
Good co-parenting communication is essential in enjoying co-parenting
-
How a prenup can be a caring document
-
How Emotional Intelligence benefits for an amicable divorce
-
Best Interest of the Child
divorce #marriage #co-parenting #multiplemarriages #lawyers #grief #grieving #therapy #communication #relationshippatterns #childsupport #spousalsupport #alimony #divorcepodcast #divorcepodcast #amicabledivorce #vulnerable #vulnerability #prenup #couplestherapy #blendedfamilies #emotionalintelligence #emotions #intention #BestInterestsoftheChild #family #parentalalienation @LisaDavidOlson @JudithWeigle
Biography of Lisa David Olson
Lisa David Olson is a character. Olson is a self-proclaimed (Practically) World Famous Business Humorist, Multi TEDx speaker, Author, Interactive Speaker, Speaker Trainer, Podcast Host of Stranger Connections, Writer, Innovator, and Prank-Enthusiast.
Lisa has been married three times, with two of the most amicable divorces on record. She is a mother of two boys, and tep-mom for three other boys from her current #3 husband. Lisa’s relationship philosophies and application of same, provide a guiding light for those embarking on the divorce journey.
Stranger Connections podcast
Lisa@LisaDavidOlson.com
https://www.linkedin.com/in/lisa-david-olson-80376612/
In this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert, you will learn the following:
-
What a Voluntary Settlement Conference (VSC) is.
-
Who comprises and attends a VSC.
-
Purpose of a VSC.
-
The Judge in a VSC is chosen by both sides. The Judge is a Private Judge.
-
The Judge in a VSC can be directive in terms of how a Judge in a divorce trial will more than likely decide on issues.
-
What a DissoMaster calculator does for child and spousal support/alimony, and how to use it for support.
-
VSCs take place outside of a courthouse.
-
Who pays for the Judge and all legal and financial professionals in a VSC.
-
How a Mission Statement at the outset of a divorce can be helpful.
-
Divorce is a grieving process and will influence the settlement.
-
The Emotional Settlement and the Legal Settlement, how do people do both?
-
How can a Parenting Coach help in the transition from in-home parenting to co-parenting in two homes.
-
How children are affected by co-parents who fight.
-
The Goal: Two Financially Stable Households
-
Pathway to a confident financial settlement
On this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert you will learn the following:
-
The services available to the public
-
The cost involved in using the Self-Help Center
-
The availabilities and importance of language services/translators
-
Who qualifies for free court services
-
How is mediation provided if connected to a case
-
How culture affects mediation
-
How Judges are required to render decisions
-
Managing expectations of people scheduled for Hearings
-
How and when mediation is used within the court system
-
What is expected of the litigants to bring into court for their Hearings
-
How Mediation Settlement Agreements are handled by the Judge for your Hearing
-
How Self-Help Centers provide service, and the limitations imposed
-
State proposed solution to professional legal services with representation and court coordination
court #mediation #Judge #Hearings #Filing #Translation #LanguageServices #DivorceCourt #FamilyLaw #CourtFees #Evidence #Settlements #Self-HelpServices #Self-HelpCenter #Settlement Agreement
Biography of Gayle Glazer
Gayle Glazer has been a bilingual (Spanish/English) mediator in the Los Angeles Superior Courts since her retirement ten years ago from her three- decade career in the Los Angeles Unified School District.
In 2020, Ms. Glazer became a MC3 Certified Mediator in the state of California. Most recently, she has joined ACMAS, Attorney-Client Mediation and Arbitration Services through the Los Angeles County Bar Association where she will serve as the “lay” arbitrator on the State Bar of California’s Mandatory Fee Arbitration Panel.
Gayle has utilized her conflict resolution skills developed during her career to assist courtroom neophytes. She has helped the opposing parties to settle hundreds of cases, primarily in the areas of Unlawful Detainer (Eviction), Civil Harassment Restraining Orders, Workplace Violence, Elder Abuse and every type of case imaginable in Small Claims Court.
www.GlazerMediation.com
You will learn the following:
- How to approach the emotions that come up when the decision to divorce takes place.
- How to deal with grief and fear.
- Set an intent to handle the emotions in a positive way.
- Why are words important in divorce language?
- What is Trauma Bonding?
- How to choose a support group, and surround yourself with, who will keep your emotions positive.
- Are you in the Fear Rabbit Hole?
- Self-care is not optional. It gets you out of fear
- How grief can be a learning opportunity.
- How do you believe your role was supposed to be in marriage? Was this a false or true belief?
- Ask each other, “What is our perception of divorce?”
- Definition of Emotional Intelligence, and how does having EI get you through fear?
- Patty’s definition of Fear. “Fear brings you information that you need in order to be more of yourself.”
- Question your belief systems to find out why the marriage didn’t work out.
- How to handle divorce fears through Emotional Intelligence.
- When do you hire an attorney if you need representation?
- Patty’s Steps to Emotional Intelligence: Find a positive support system. Disconnect from time lines provided by others. Allow yourself to grieve. Practice self-awareness.
EmotionalIntelligence #Grief #Fear #SupportGroups #Therapy #Lawyers #Attorney #Divorce #Belief Systems #Marriage #Trauma #Emotions #Podcast #DivorcePodcast #Amicable Divorce @Patty McGuire @JudithWeigle
Biography for Patty McGuire
Patty McGuire
Founder, Positivity Influencer Coaching
Patty@thepositivityinfluencer.com
www.loveyourmarriageagain.com
Patty McGuire started as a self-worth coach who taught her clients how to create more love and happiness in their lives - one step at a time. Specializing in emotional wellness, divorce recovery and saving marriages, her unique method guides people from fear and pain back to love.
McGuire is now an Emotional Intelligence Master and Coach, and speaks with clients individually and for C-Suite Executives who want to bring Emotional Intelligence to their businesses and leadership methods.
In this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert, you will learn the following:
-
Getting Legal Advice is being Disloyal to Your Spouse. “We decided we wanted to keep it amicable, and going to an attorney makes it litigious.”
-
Filing a Response to the Petition makes the divorce contentious.
-
More parenting time will be given to Mom. The fear of most men.
-
“The Judge will see my side if we go to court.”
-
The ruder the lawyer, the better the outcome for their client.
-
The Mediator or Document Preparation people can give legal advice and consulting.
-
Filing a huge brief or statement at a Hearing will help you win in court.
-
The first person who files has the upper hand or advantage.
-
Asking for financial damages because the marriage didn’t work out.
-
“I’ll take everything, even full custody of the kids, if you divorce me.”
In this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast you will learn the following:
-
Why Laughter is Important
-
Why physical exercise is necessary
-
Why the combination of exercise with laughter is golden
-
The emotional effects of laughter
-
The physical effects of laughter
-
Scientific evidence that laughter is the best medicine
-
How stress can cause serious life illness
-
Suggestions for exercise with laughter
stress #laughter #exercise #self-care #divorce #MayoClinic #medicine #illness #podcast #amicable #divorcepodcast
In this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert, you will learn the following:
-
People feel out of control during divorce. (Expand)
-
People need to know how to incorporate the work that is required of them in the filing process, and in the decision-making process. Compartmentalizing time is the way to deal with divorce IF you absolutely have to work.
- If you have the luxury of not having to work, then make divorce your job and focus your attention on getting everything necessary for the divorce to move forward expeditiously.
-
We are a culture that supports and glorifies multi-tasking. Multi-tasking divorce into daily routines will make you sick and potentially cause severe illness. Multi-tasking is the last behavior that should be accepted. Separating everything necessary to deal with the legal side of divorce properly, with a clear mind and a calm heart is the only way to properly address the process of divorce.
-
Choose divorce professionals who understand and support the separation of your daily lives from your divorce life. Here’s what I mean…Look at the time you have available outside of your jobs and outside of the schedules for your children for you to complete paperwork, go to mediations, engage in depositions, go to Hearings and Depositions, and any other meetings necessary for the divorce to move forward, and schedule those free times and/or personal days from work, to focus on the divorce. The operative word being focus. Good divorce decisions require nothing less than focus; focus of the mind, of the heart, and of the emotions. When we try and multi-task the divorce stuff into our regular daily stuff, we cannot give divorce stuff the correct focus and attention that it needs to be lasting and appropriate for your lives, especially once the divorce is final. People experience decision-makers remorse because their decisions were made too hastily.
-
Put a schedule together that allows you to work without interruption, that gives you valuable time with your children and all of the activities in their lives, and that provides for exercise and alone time. Look at the remaining time and that’s what you assign for divorce work. Then share that schedule with your divorce professionals, and stick to it. Return emails, phone calls, and paperwork in the time assigned for divorce.
-
The only fly in the ointment of your well-crafted schedule will be Hearings, Depositions, a few meetings with those filing for you, and Mediations, The court isn’t opened on weekends, so personal time from work will have to be taken. If you share that you’re going through a divorce with either your Human Resources department, or your manager/business owner, you both can work together to craft a schedule that allows for work to continue and for your schedule to have flexibility.
-
Lastly, do not respond to angry texts and emails from your spouse during work or family time. That can be done within your divorce time. Nothing will disrupt your day more than mean emails and texts. Control this shit. Do not succumb to disruptive communication. Put it in its place! Your divorce time slot. Everything, as much as possible, goes there.
Compartmentalizing Time will give you a better life quality during divorce, and you will have developed a skill that can be used in any conflict. Part of this is Mindfulness, and part of this is simply scheduling. Have the confidence and the courage to take charge of your time.
time #control #compartmentalizetime #mediation #divorce #depositions #hearings #work #HumanResources #podcast #divorcepodcast #court #divorcecourt #emails #texts #communication #focus #work
Biography
Judith M. Weigle has been a divorce mediator and document preparation service for 11 years as President of Divorce Resource, Inc. in Los Angeles. In that time she has seen people approach divorce in various ways, and has developed the Recipe for a Heart-Healthy Divorce, a four-step strategy to an amicable and productive divorce. Judith has aggregated the four essential steps that she has learned not only from her clients, but from the learned experts on her podcast to provide a successful formula for the best divorce possible.
www.DivorceResourceInc.com
www.JudithWeigle.com
LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/judith-m-weigle-65b1268/
IG @TheAmicableDivorceExpert
Facebook https://www.facebook.com/JudithMWeigle
310.441.7555
Judy@DivorceResourceInc.com
In this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast, you will learn the following:
-
What defines Communication a. Our words b. Our tone of voice c. How we physically appear
-
How does bad communication sound? a. Filled with anger b. Yelling c. Arrogant d. Threatening
-
How does good communication sound? a. Listening to learn b. Not interrupting c. Speaking from the heart, without blame d. Soft or nonthreatening tone of voice e. Compassion f. Asking questions to get a deeper understanding of what your spouse is trying to say g. If you’re responding to a threatening spouse, keep responses to a minimum, and very neutral; don’t buy into the argument
-
BIFF a. In-person bad communication: Response (bad to good) b. Text communication c. Email communication d. Timing of bad communication responses
-
Court Communication a. Judges don’t want to hear you talk shit about your spouse. (Judge Terry Crone and Judge Michele Lowrance) b. When one party hires a shark lawyer and the other party is self-represented, don’t think there is an inherent disadvantage (Pam Payton)
-
Mediation Communication a. Get legally educated so you can negotiate from a point of knowledge b. Look your best c. Be on time d. Be prepared e. Listen without interrupting f. Don’t grimace or make negative facial gestures g. Don’t say, “Are you done yet?” in an exasperated way. h. Don’t cop attitude i. Don’t fight
In this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert, you will learn the following:
-
Settle the Emotional Divorce before Settling the Legal Divorce
- You can make sound legal decisions while emotional
- You’ll spend way too much money on attorneys and court fees when you should be spending money on healing through therapists and coaches
- If you’ve already started filing, but find it too emotionally stressful to participate, ask for everyone involved to grant you some time to process the reasons for the divorce before resuming the filing
-
Learn Communication Skills for Conflict
- Even in an amicable divorce you’re going to get triggered and fight
- If you have a high conflict divorce, you can still change the trajectory of the emotion by knowing successful communication techniques
- BIFF is your new best friend
-
Compartmentalize Time
- So that your divorce doesn’t consume your life
- To keep focus where it needs to be when you’re at work, when you’re with your children, and when you’re with your family and friends
- To re-establish control in your life
-
Develop a Self-Care Program w/Laughter
- Laughter is the Best Medicine for a Hurting Heart
- Physical exercise gets you out of your head because it changes your focus from stressing about the divorce to the activity in which you’re engaged
- Laughter will shock your nervous system in a good way
divorce #amicabledivorce #highconflictdivorce #emotionaldivorce #emotions #recipe #heart-healthy #money #attorneys #divorcecourt #legaldivorce #BIFF #communication #communicationtechniques #time #compartmentalizetime #self-careprogram #selfcare #control #workstress #MayoClinic #laughterasmedicine #goatyoga #puppyyoga #exercise #podcast #divorcepodcast @JudyWeigle @JudithWeigle @RecipeforaHeartHealthyDivorce
Judith Weigle has been a family law mediator for 11 years, in her business Divorce Resource, Inc. She created Recipe for a Heart-Healthy Divorce after working with divorcing couples who exhibited stress and acrimony in the filing and in the mediation of their settlement. The four ingredients in the Recipe for a Heart-Healthy Divorce will turn your divorce around, even if only one spouses employs these techniques.
Individual Coaching available.
www.Divorce ResourceInc.com
In this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast, you will learn the following about Parental Alienation:
- What You Can Do If You Are the Victim of Parental Alienation
- Before the divorce
- Document happy experiences with your children
- Video & audio recordings, artwork
- School Records
- Find an attorney and/or mediator knowledgeable in Parental Alienation
- Test them, question them, make sure they know what you want
- Don’t want vengeance. Always make it about the best interests of the children, not about what happened to you.
- During the Divorce
- COURT TIME
- Always be on your best behavior. Stay calm and rational, even when it hurts
- Never bad mouth your ex to ANYONE
- See a therapist alone
- Know your rights; consult with experts
- Be honest even if your ex isn’t
- Insert in the custody order that the children do not have the right to unilaterally change visiting times.
- Ask for consequences if one parent attempts to align the children against the other parent.
- After the Divorce
- What you should do when the children begin to behave badly towards you
- Stay calm and rational – even if it hurts
- Don’t bad mouth your ex
- Document everything
- Get clear video evidence and make sure the sound and picture are clear
- If you become a target or if they start to ignore the custody times
- Document everything
- Call the police but don’t expect them to do anything and have your court order in your hand when you call them.
- Get a copy of the police report or the report number
- Get a Temporary Restraining Order
- Contempt charges are rare and difficult
- Bring all your evidence to court and have it readily accessible for the judge who should want to view it and read it.
- What you should do when the children begin to behave badly towards you
- COURT TIME
- Document happy experiences with your children
- Before the divorce
podcast #parentalalienation #court #evidence #legalrights #co-parenting #custody #childsupport #witnesses #mediator #attorney #parentchildrelationship #divorce #emotions #police #Judge #temporaryrestariningorder #activist #bestbehavior #communication #conflictcommunication #courtpreparation #beforedivorce #duringdivorce #afterdivorce @RonBerglas @TheAmicableDivorceExpert
RON BERGLAS Biography
Ron Berglas is a mediator with Magnum Mediation. Ron is also the Chair of the Parental Alienation Legislative Group. Together with his colleague Dr. Lynn Steinberg and a group of like-minded alienated parents, they have focused their despair at losing their children to the malign intentions of their former partners into a driving force to enact legislation that would require all mental health practitioners who work with children to be educated in parental alienation. They also continue to combat through legislative action the plethora of misinformation campaigns that have appeared recently that deny the existence of parental alienation.
The Parental Alienation Legislative Group together with PASI, Parental Alienation Syndrome
Intervention, is run by Joan Kloth-Zanard in New York, New York to oversee our 501C3.
Magnum Mediation
909-283-3991
info@magnumediation.com
LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/ron-berglas-04
Parental Alienation website: www.palgandpasi.org
In this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert, you will learn the following:
- How to identify if you are or were held hostage in your marriage.
- How to identify a cult-like mentality.
- How you can be seduced by someone who wants to control you.
- What seduction is like, and why it begins the process of control.
- How you become a slave to your spouse in your relationship.
- Neither education nor intelligence have anything to do with being seduced and held hostage in the relationship.
- What love bombing is and how it is part of the seduction process to establish the hostage relationship.
- How and when we give our power away to someone else.
- Are you making choices against your own best interests, and compromising your values?
- If you’re in a cult-like relationship questioning the other person is not possible.
- Extricating yourself from a cult-like marriage or divorce.
- Own your story and drop your shame.
hostage #cult #relationshiphostage #lovebombing #seduction #control #selfexpression #budget #allowmance #money #jointbankaccount #slave #values #heldhostage #marriage #divorce #compromise #higherlifepurpose #author #cultmember #relationship #DalaiLama #doubt #selfexploration #selfdoubt #vulnerable #courage #shame #lifechoices #survival #failure @DalaiLama @KellyThiel
Biography
Kelly Thiel, author of Unapologetically Glorious, and featured in the documentary series “Seduced” speaks on her experience as part of a cult, how it began and how it ended. Kelly is an accomplished voice actress, author, speaker, consultant, and survivor of the notorious NXIVM cult. Kelly speaks around the world about her personal journey on conquering her own trauma to, in turn, help men and women facing similar adversaties or traumas to conquer their own and rediscover themselves.
IG: @TheKellyThiel
www.KellyThiel.com
In this 2023 episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast, you will learn the following:
Trust is a concern in every relationship. From the trust we place in our restaurant takeout orders being correct, to the trust we place in our children when they’re not in our care, to the trust we place in our medical professionals, the clergy, to the huge trust we place in our spouses to always behave in a way that is respectful, caring, and protective of us.
When our trust is broken in any of our important relationships, we’re crushed. Our whole emotional and physical systems quiver. We are emotionally off-balance. We are no longer comfortable in those relationships.
Now divorce is imminent. And trust is on the line. We second-guess ourselves because we no longer trust our decision-making. All sorts of questions run through our minds: “Did we really know the person we married? Did we miss clues that should have made us suspicious? Was it something I did and didn’t realize it was causing a problem?” Or, if there was no event that broke the marriage, just two people growing apart, distrust still creeps in because divorce is generally a foreign environment, a language filled with words we don’t typically use, and we have to make really important decisions about money, co-parenting, and living as single people again. Fear rears its ugly head and distrust is the new emotion.
Trust can take on a whole new meaning in our lives if we start with trusting ourselves to be able to deal with the divorce, the future, and a new life. Life is full of challenges, and divorce is one of them. We can get through any challenge if we find a support system of professionals who can put fear and distrust in its place, and help create a foundation in us to tap into our inner strength and resilience, and respond to the decision-making in divorce in an affirmative, focused, honest way.
We are so much stronger than we give ourselves credit for. We may need the help of a divorce coach or a therapist to bring that resilience forward, but it’s there in every one of us.
If your marriage is ending simply because you’ve both grown apart, distrust still makes its way into your brains because you are no longer working as a team, a unit moving forward together. You are now two individuals who are dividing your stuff, expensive stuff, stuff that was accumulated over quite a few years. You’re not used to this dynamic. The brain goes into protective mode, fight or flight, and you no longer trust each other, even though neither of you have done anything to breach trust.
In this case, remember, you are the same good people you have been. No need to distrust one another. But definitely a time to assert the personal power you have and be vocal, be supportive of yourself, be kind and generous, but be mindful that you are both equally scared, regardless of the posturing of the other spouse. Everyone is scared. No one is secure in divorce.
Trust in yourself will allow you to trust someone else again.
trust #honesty #divorce #podcast #relationships #communication #fear #distrust #marriage #adultery #infidelity #emotion
Divorce is a series of decisions. Starting with the emotional tone of the divorce: Are you filing while you’re angry and wanting to hurt your spouse, or do you look at your divorce as a necessary life change that can help both you and your spouse to grow better? It’s never a good idea to start the filing until you’ve calmed down, gone through the divorce grief stages, maybe, possibly, hopefully forgiven yourself and/or your spouse.
The centerpiece to all of the decisions in a divorce is honesty. When both spouses can talk before filing and sort out their feelings honestly, the settlement will be so much easier. It still may take some negotiating, but the conversation will be easier because the emotions of the divorce have been settled. It’s those unresolved emotions that affect the tone of the divorce, the litigious extent of the divorce, and the financial cost of the divorce.
A more correct reality of the marriage and why it has to conclude unfolds in a heartfelt conversation to end the marriage. Blame is stripped away. Anger subsides, forgiveness and understanding move into our hearts when we can openly, honestly, and without blame or justification for past actions and decisions, simply speak from each spouse’s perspective. Everyone has their own perspective on the meaning and purpose of events that shape our lives; and that perspective must be spoken and accepted. People can look at one event and process it differently.
The important conversation may come at different points in the settling of the emotional part of the divorce. It may not come in the very first conversation. It may come after several conversations, but when it does come, it will change the trajectory of the divorce, and the way each spouse thinks of each other and behaves towards each other going forward.
It’s crucial that the divorce is used to grow. Growing in a way that allows for more self-awareness so that the next relationship fulfills people in a more specific way. Or if no other relationship is sought, then let it be growth that simply reveals parts of oneself that help in the overall journey in this life.
emotionalintelligence #communication #amicable #amicabledivorce #forgiveness #honesty #emotionaldivorce #anger #blame #grief #personalgrowth #growth #podcast #divorcepodcast #conversation
In this 2023 episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert, you will learn the following:
- How to detect financial abuse in the marriage
- What to do with financial abuse in the divorce
- Emotional Abuse and Money
- Physical Abuse and Money
- How to pay your attorney with no access to money
- Court order for legal fees
- Transparency in declaring assets
- What Forensic Accountants do
- Marital Estate Chart
- When litigation is needed
- The importance of reviewing financial documents for each transaction
- When to hire a larger firm or a sole practitioner
- How to handle the fear of asking for a divorce in an abusive marriage
- The importance of having a therapist or divorce coach as a support system
- Order of Protection for physical abuse
- How and when to serve the Petition for divorce on the abusive spouse
financialabuse #jointbankaccounts #creditcards #allowance #physicalabuse #emotionalabuse #marriage #divorce #breadwinner #finances #wageearner #control #accesstomoney #childcare #taxreturns #taxfiling #financialpressure #mindset #finacialmindset #dishonesty #budgeting #budget #financiallydisadvantagedspouse #initialretainer #equality #legalrights #legalfees #court #incarceration #Judge’sorders #assets #transparency #forensicaccountant #fear
@LisaZeiderman
Biography of Lisa Zeiderman, Esq.
Lisa Zeiderman is Managing Partner at Miller Zeiderman LLP, based in New York. A matrimonial attorney, CFL and Certified Divorce Financial Analyst, she regularly handles complex financial and custody divorce matters, as well as pre- and post-nuptial agreements for high-net-worth individuals.
In addition to authoring a well-read blog on Psychology Today, “Legal Matters: Understanding Mental Health Issues as They Apply to Divorce and Child Custody,” Ms. Zeiderman is regularly published in Financial Advisor Magazine, the New York Law Journal, and Forbes. She is also regularly interviewed on issues ranging from financial empowerment to complex tax issues and child custody, and has been featured in a host of media from The Wall Street Journal to Kiplinger’s, as well as on a multitude of podcasts.
Lz@mzw-law.com
914 455 1000
LinkedIn: (99+) Lisa Zeiderman, Esq | LinkedIn --@lisazeiderman
Instagram: @lisazeiderman
Facebook: @lisazeidermanesq
Twitter @lisazeiderman
In this 2023 episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast, you will learn the following:
- Living longer lives makes it harder to grow old together
- Women initiate divorce more than me
- Different reasons why people file for divorce after a long-term marriage
- Women’s income will decrease by 40% in her 60’s, and men by 23%
- Focus on using a financial expert to help split a pension properly
-
1 mistake women make: thinking they have to keep the family home
- How to budget for the future
- Divorce can provide an opportunity to live the life you’ve always wanted to live
- Identifying Needs vs Wants in financial planning
- Establish financial safety nets before filing for divorce
- The importance of running 3 credit reports in preparation for divorce
- Desired Lifestyle vs Available Income
- When to take Social Security. How to determine social security. How to equalize social security for both spouses.
- Emotional Money Block and Your Money Story
- How do your values align with your relationship to money?
- Long-term care for women
women #money #educate #financial #divorce #greydivorce #income #longtermmarriage #longtermcare #lifeinsurance #annuity #budget #creditreport #socialsecurity #moneyblock #emotionalmoneyblock #selfworth #values #lifestyle #financialplanning #women #pension #financialsafetynet #podcast #2023 #episode #financialcoach #CPA @LindaLingo
Linda Lingo is an authority on women building wealth. Her successful 35-year career in corporate America and her 10 years as a Financial Advisor has given her practical experience, radical knowledge and a deep understanding of the best ways to manage money for the modern-day woman.
Linda has served as the treasurer of The Women’s Fund, Assertive Women Entrepreneurs and Women of Vision. She has been active in Soroptimist International, and Girls Inc. She also supports women-owned businesses as an Activator with SheEO, and is active in the National Cinderella to CEO Awards Program.
Linda Lingo, Financial Coach & CPA
530-710-8301
linda@lindalingo.com
www.lindalingo.com
https://www.facebook.com/lindalingofinancialcoach/
instagram.com/moneymamamentor
linkedin.com/in/lindalingo
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCZlqhRTVcGwmiSyQqbb09jg
In this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast you will learn:
- Age of Children
- Polarity of Parenting Styles
- Conflict with Ex-spouse
- Over-attachment of Non-custodial parent to child
- Over-attachment of biological parent to child
- There are more Blended Families than First Families.
- Co-habitation rates are soaring, making blended families hard to track.
- When single parents start dating, step-family dynamics start at this point.
- Children grieve the loss of the family, just like parents grieve the loss of the marriage.
- Family Mission Statement
stepparent #stepparentcoach #blendedfamilies #exspouse #childsupport #cohabitation #dating #noncustodialparent #custodialparent #parentingstyles #author #biologicalparent #conflict #parentalalienation #familymissionstatements #consequences #rules #punishment #siblingrivalry #attachment #overattachment @JudyGraybill
Judy Graybill: links, contact info, and bio
free mini e-book, The 5 Biggest Risks of Conflict in Blended Families: https://tinyurl.com/5BlendedFamilyRisks
FB group for women in stepfamilies: https://tinyurl.com/TheWholeisticStepfamily
website: https://judygraybill.com
email: hello@judygraybill.com
Instagram: @judy.m.graybill
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/judygraybill
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/judygraybill/
MeWe: https://mewe.com/i/judymgraybill
As a Relationship Healer and Certified Stepfamily Coach, Judy Graybill is skilled at identifying where couples get stuck. She helps them develop the mindset, strategy, and action plan to establish long-term harmony, deeper intimacy, and a stronger partnership. She’s also speaks, writes, facilitates in-person workshops, and is co-founder of the group, The Wholistic Stepfamily. Get details and free resources at www.JudyGraybill.com.
In this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast, you will learn the following:
- What a Prenup is
- What makes a prenup good or bad
- The requirement to know the laws of your state before giving up marital rights in the prenup
- Why some people want prenups
- Why some people agree to sign them even though one person may be disadvantaged
- What you can or can’t do in a divorce with a lousy prenup
- The real benefit in a good prenup
- How mediation can be used to revisit a lousy prenup
- Spousal support, prenups, and inherited money
- Spousal support is part of the equity in a marriage
- People’s relationship to money and how it affects relationships
- How bad prenups make the marriage weak
- What Promissory Estoppel is and how it affects spousal support
- How a postnup can correct a lousy prenup
- Enforceability of prenups
- On-line prenups
- How a good prenup is organized, approached, negotiated, and well thought out beyond the existing assets
- How to respond if you’re “given” a prenup to sign
- How a prenup is “fair” to both people
- What “lifestyle” provisions are that would end a marriage
nofaultdivorce #prenup #prenups #postnup #promissoryestoppel #mediation #communityproperty #separateproperty #inheritance #TheGenerousPrenup #author #marriage #divorce #enforceability #podcast #spousalsupport #alimony #childsupport #statelaws
Biography
Laurie Israel is a collaborative lawyer and mediator based in Massachusetts. She is the author of “The Generous Prenup: How to Support your Marriage and Avoid the Pitfalls” (2018). Laurie now concentrates her practice on prenups, and has been mediating prenups and postnups in Massachusetts as well as throughout the U.S. She has written extensively on prenups and on the art and skill of mediating prenups, which she believes is the optimal way to help couples mutually address the terms of a prenup and how they may affect each of the parties in the future.
Laurie began her involvement in the area of prenups as a representative for clients negotiating their agreements. She has experienced first-hand how couples can harm each other during the negotiation process in a way that may not easily be forgotten. Laurie believes that if not dealt with in an equitable manner, the content and process of some prenups can do irreparable damage to a couple embarking on marriage. The message in her book “The Generous Prenup” is that prenups are not to be taken lightly and should be used only when absolutely necessary, and when both parties are comfortable with the entire process. She believes the professionals involved should be keenly aware of the issue of fairness to both parties and consider the ultimate health of the ensuing marriage.
www.LaurieIsrael.com
laurie@laurieisrael.com
Twitter @laurieisrael
Facebook https://www.facebook.com/LaurieIsraelAuthor/
Mediate.com https://mediate.com/author/laurie-israel/
Huffington Post https://www.huffpost.com/author/lisrael-911
On this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast you will learn the following:
- The three programs Vicky has that address both managers and employees during the divorce and after: Manage Right; Plan Right, Resolve Right
- The special services available for specific needs of some divorcing couples, like a special needs child.
- The importance of testing for special needs children that must be addressed in the divorce.
- The Divorce Right services include Coaches, Lawyers, Therapists, Clergy, Culture Specialists, LGBTQ specialist, Immigration specialists, Career Coaches.
- Divorce is the number one reason women find themselves in poverty after divorce.
- What can a manager or business owner do to manage their own emotions during divorce.
- Lawyering Up can bring you down, and the pointlessness of this approach.
- The importance of guidance and direction from a support team to bring sanity and emotional grounding.
- Work performance suffers a 40% loss in productivity because of divorce.
- The 5 signs of divorce distraction at work: Absences, presenteeism, emotional outbursts, errors
- Family Transition Policy for companies to help divorcing employees.
- Fear of being fired forces employees to quit rather than be fired. Feeling unsupported by their companies. Can’t afford affordable housing near work. Affordable child care available at work or near work.
- Create a company culture of Respect, Empathy, Compassion.
divorce #divorcesupportteam #careercounselors #therapist #divorcecoach #lawyer #attorney #mediator #mediation #productivity #lostproductivity #company culture #respect #empathy #compassion #immigration #culturespecialists #guidance #direction #emotionalgrounding #emotion #emotionalsupport # fear #childcare #daycare #affordablechildcare #affordabledaycare #absenteeism #presenteeism @VickyTownsend @PattyMcGuire
Biography
Vicky Townsend is the President and founder of Divorce Right, Inc., a professional development and employee assistance program company.
Vicky is also the co-founder of the National Association of Divorce Professionals, an association for all the licensed professionals that work with clients before, during, and after divorce.
www.DivorceRightInc.com
Vicky@DivorceRightInc.com
On this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast, you will learn the following:
- What it means to be Child-Centered in a Divorce
- Children feel a sense of responsibility in the break-up of the marriage
- How parents grieve the break-up of the marriage and put their children at the forefront of the divorce at the same time
- The importance of a support team for parents to help them go through the grieving process: Mediator, Divorce Coach, Therapist
- Choose lawyers who are child-centered, not aggressive attorneys, even if you have a high conflict, bullying attorney
- What to tell the children regarding the divorce; how to tell the children about the divorce
- The divorce can be a model for positive change for the children
- The biggest fear of children of a divorce, and how to change that fear
- How to reinforce hope for the children
- Parental Alienation: What it is, how it starts, and the long-range effects on the children
- Co-Parenting Schedules
- How to work with different parenting styles
divorce #co-parenting #child-centered #child-centereddivorce #divorcesupportteam #parenting #divorcecoach #therapist #therapy #grief #change #parentalalienation #fear #children #co-parentingschedules #parentingstyles #hope #attorneys #bullyattorneys #highconflict #disciplinarybehavior #datingafterdivorce #author #certifieddivorcecoach @RosalindSedacca @JudithWeigle
Rosalind Sedacca, CDC is a Divorce & Co-Parenting Coach, recognized as The Voice of Child-Centered Divorce. She is the founder of the Child-Centered Divorce Network which provides valuable resources for parents who are facing, moving through or transitioning after a divorce. She is also the author of How Do I Tell the Kids about the Divorce? A Create-a-Storybook Guide to Preparing Your Children – with Love!and co-host of Divorce, Dating & Empowered Living Radio Show & Podcast. Rosalind is an expert blogger for numerous divorce, parenting and dating websites and blogs. Rosalind’s books, courses and programs for divorced parents and singles starting over can be found at her websites: www.childcentereddivorce.com, www.womendatingafter40.com, www.womendatingrescue.com and www.mensdatingformula.com.
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ChildCenteredDivorce
LinkedIn: http://www.linkedin.com/in/rosalindsedacca
YouTube: youtube.com/@RosalindSedacca
Twitter: https://twitter.com/RosalindSedacca
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/rosalindsedacca/
On this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert, you will learn the following:
- The difference in grief during and after divorce
- What emotions come after divorce
- How to determine your new persona after divorce
- How to get unstuck in the process of divorce and after divorce
- How important the grief process is in cleansing the emotions from the hurt of divorce
- How to consider your true purpose in life
- How to transfer Mom Skills to outside work
- A peek at Special Needs Children and the demands made on the parents
- The military vs. challenging marriages and obedience
- How to tell if you’re in an abusive marriage
grief #divorcegrief #abuse #abusivemarriage #emotions #lifepurpose #complexkids #specialneedschildren #obedience #author #divorcerecoverycoach #podcast @keenacrowley @judithweigle
Eykiena Crowley US Army Veteran, Divorce Recovery Coach | CEO My Thriving Life Academy
Eykiena “Keena” Crowley is a Divorce Recovery Coach, International Speaker, Published Author of A Superwoman’s Guide to Recovering After Divorce,and Influencer. This Combat Army Veteran and Former Social Work Therapist now uses her experience and training to lead the masses to their greatness by using their inner gifts to elevate to their blissful life.
As the Chairwoman of the My Thriving Life Academy, her firm’s courses, events, and results-based coaching & consulting programs empower divorced women to use their gifts to have a fulfilled life on their own terms. From her one-on-one coaching, group training events and online seminars, she helps the masses significantly shift their lives.
Social Media Handles
IG https://www.instagram.com/CoachingwithKeena/
Facebook https://www.facebook.com/CoachingwithKeena/
TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@coachingwithkeena
Youtube https://www.youtube.com/@coachingwithkeena
LinkedIn http://www.linkedin.com/in/CoachingwithKeena
Pinterest https://www.pinterest.com/CoachingwithKeena/
Contact Info
Email: info@iamkeenacrowley.com
Free Gift: www.keenafreegift.com
Complimentary Breakthrough Call: Calendly.com/eykiena
On this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast you will learn the following:
- What a High Conflict Marriage looks like
- What High Conflict means
- How a High Conflict Marriage turns into a High Conflict Divorce
- Flexibility, Openness and Communication are trademarks of a standard marriage
- Deflect and Blame are trademarks of a high conflict personality
- Complex marriages have one person afraid to talk and unable to freely be the person they are
- The decision to leave is the first big step in a high conflict marriage
- How to deal with the threats that come with the decision to leave the marriage
- Communication strategy to threats
- Assess the kind of attorney you need. If your spouse is a bully, don’t hire a bully attorney or you’ll get caught in the middle of two bullies.
- What divorce is really about
- Listening with Curiosity is the Key in having a successful settlement negotiation
- How the behavior of each spouse affects the response of the other spouse and outcome of a negotiation
- Timing is everything in the advance planning to exit the marriage and the house
- Support Teams are the Lifeline to High Conflict Divorces
highconflictmarriage #highconflictdivorce #mediation #divorcecoach #attorneyfees #listening #communication #supportteams #divorcesupportteams #communicationstrategy @KarenMcMahon @TheAmicableDivorceExpert #amicabledivorce
Biography for Karen McMahon
Karen McMahon is a Certified Relationship and Divorce Coach and Founder of Journey Beyond Divorce. She began divorce coaching in 2010 after recognizing that the pain of her divorce led her on a transformational journey into a powerful and unexpected new life. Karen leads a national team of divorce coaches in supporting men and women around the world to become calm, clear and confident as they navigate divorce. Karen is the host of the acclaimed Journey Beyond Divorce Podcast, co-author of ‘Stepping out of Chaos: Turning Pain to Possibility”, creator of JBD’s exclusive Accelerated Divorce Recovery Program.
Social Media Handles and Number of Followers
https://www.linkedin.com/in/karenmcmahon/
https://www.facebook.com/journeybeyonddivorce
https://www.instagram.com/journey_beyond_divorce/
TikTok
https://www.tiktok.com/@journeybeyonddivo
JBD Podcast
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/journey-beyond-divorce-podcast/id1261400624
On this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert you will learn the following:
- What Conflict Communication is
- What “showing up” means
- Why the way we show up matters
- The elements in our communication and facial expressions that affect the other party
- Emotional Intelligence
- Relationship Management
- What happens in our bodies when we’re in conflict and fear
- How to turn fear around in our bodies
- Tone of voice and choice of words matter
- Identify your triggers
- Go through the Emotional Divorce before Filing
- Mediation mistakes with Settlement
- Both spouses need to go through the emotions of uncoupling
- Address the Hurt to get to a Better Settlement
- Where Trust fits into the settlement negotiations and mediation
- The importance of pre-mediation before both spouses attend
- Emotional potential
- Depersonalize issues with the other spouse
- Four Communication Styles
- How your parental families determine future relationships
emotionalintelligence #conflictcommunication #communication #facialexpressions #relationshipmanagement #triggers #response #emotionalpotential #deepbreathing #triggers #emotionaldivorce #hurt #rejection #trust #distrust #mediation #emotionalpotential #communicationstyles #expressive #conflictavoidance #analyzer #selfawareness #family #relationships #pain #gain #conflictcoach #compassion #empathy #sympathy #warmheartedness
Dr. Debra Dupree Biography
Dr. Debra is a Dispute Resolution Specialist, Conflict | Leadership Coach, and International Trainer and Keynote Speaker. She hosts the podcast ‘Decoding the Conflict Mindset’ to bring ‘thought leaders’ from business and legal worlds to her community worldwide to gain insight when high emotions run high and tough negotiations are at stake. She also founded the virtual mentorship program “The Agile Lawyer-Mediator Interview Series” drawing upon 12 topnotch advocates and mediators.
Dr. Dupree is author of Your Emotional Potential: How You Show Up Matters
Dispute Resolution Specialist: Mediation & Conflict Coach | Podcast Host | International Speaker | Author
LINKED IN| FACEBOOK| Instagram | YouTube
Happy with my services? Help me grow my business and leave a review here: https://bit.ly/DupreeBizReview
619.433.4264
In this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast, you will learn:
- Why family law professionals are being murdered
- Who is murdered and by who
- How family law professionals protect themselves
- Why clients need to be open about the emotional and domestic violence issues with a soon-to-be former spouse
- Who is responsible for the divorce remaining amicable
- The weapon of choice in family law professional shootings are guns, and guns need to be disclosed to your attorney
- Domestic violence can lead to child abduction
- Importance of providing updates to your attorney about violent incidences that have currently happened with your spouse
- Value the safety of your family law professionals
domesticviolence #violence #divorce #amicabledivorce #lawyers #attorneys #guns #gunviolence #shootings #weapons #childabduction #mentalhealth #emotions #familylaw #safety #mediators #therapists #legal #team @TracyAnnMoore-Grant @JudithWeigle
Tracy Ann Moore-Grant Biography
Tracy Ann Moore-Grant, Esq. is the founder of the Amicable Divorce Network, established to address a growing need to assist clients who desire to keep their divorce low conflict and to effectively connect them to professionals who are vetted for having a resolution mindset so parties can avoid unnecessary and expensive litigation. The professionals in the Amicable Divorce Network design both the timeline and team for the divorcing parties based on their needs and finances. Ms. Moore-Grant is passionate about helping families navigate the difficult process of divorce in a respectful and family-focused manner and now represents clients exclusively in amicable and uncontested cases. She is also a mediator, arbitrator, parent coordinator, divorce consultant and guardian ad litem.
Ms. Moore-Grant is a registered mediator with both the Georgia Office of Dispute Resolution and 9th District ADR for both family law and domestic violence cases as a mediator and arbitrator. She is a step-mother, baker, and schnauzer lover. She is also a Board Member for Mentor Me of North Georgia, contributing writer to My Forsyth Magazine, Mock Trial Coach for Alliance Academy, and teaches Constitutional Law at Lanier Tech. She has achieved an AV Preeminent Judicial Rating from Martindale Hubble, was named a Woman of Forsyth by the Forsyth County News, and has been listed as a Top 10 Female Family Law Attorney in Georgia since 2016. Her firm, Patterson Moore Butler received a Best of Forsyth award in 2022. In 2020, Tracy Ann was personally awarded the Georgia Legal Award for Distinguished Leadership for founding the Amicable Divorce Network, recognizing its positive impact on Georgia family law and families. Ms. Moore-Grant has been a guest on many podcasts and has authored many articles on the topic of amicable divorce.
info@amicabledivorcenetwork.com
website: https://www.amicabledivorcenetwork.com/
facebook: https://www.facebook.com/amicabledivorcenetwork
youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCCzk3S9DfTsyCVxeBGyFkXw
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/81285690/admin/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/amicabledivorcenetwork
On this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert you will learn:
- How to detect a Positive Lawyer
- How to Humanize the legal profession
- Why lawyers are negative and want to fight
- People find the lawyers who match their level of ethics
- Positive Psychology helps find Positive Lawyers
- The importance of happiness in the attitude of your lawyer
- Your lawyer should have a positive attitude on life to positively represent their clients
- How to be positive in a negative line of work, divorce
- The importance of gratitude for happiness
- Relationships are important to happiness
- Happiness is lived in the moment
lawyer #attorney #positivethinking #divorce #negativeemotions #well-being #gratitude #depression #happiness #shifting focus #relationships #positivityresonance #oneness #humanconnection #coaching
Biography of Jordana Confino
Jordana Confino is a professional coach, law school assistant dean, and professor dedicated to helping high-achieving professionals realize their own authentic vision of success and achieve greater satisfaction in their lives and work. Seven years after graduating from Yale Law School, Jordana founded JC Coaching & Consulting to advance the well-being of the legal profession and empower lawyers and other professionals to transform their lives and work for the better. Having spent the bulk of her career working as a lawyer and in legal education at elite institutions, Jordana knows that many high-achieving, successful people hold limiting beliefs that prevent them from truly flourishing. For many years, she was one of them. Jordana transformed her life leveraging the science of positive psychology and human motivation theory, and she is passionate about helping others do the same.
Jordana serves as the Assistant Dean of Professionalism and an Adjunct Professor at Fordham Law School, where she oversees the school’s wellness, professional identity formation, and mentorship offerings, and teaches courses on Positive Lawyering and Peer Mentoring & Leadership. She was voted Adjunct Law Professor of the Year in 2021.
Jordana holds a J.D. from Yale Law School, a B.A. in Psychology from Yale University, and a Certification in Applied Positive Psychology from the New York Open Center. She is a member of the International Coaching Federation.
Social Media & Website
- LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jordanaconfino/
- Website: jordanaconfino.com/coaching
- Blog: jordanaconfino.com/blog
For more information: jordanaconfino.com/coaching
On this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast this is what you will learn:
- How childhood relationships affect adult relationships
- Repeating the relationship of our parents is normal
- The importance of communicating your needs in your marriage
- How blame disables forward movement
- How to leave the blame cycle
- Relationship deal breakers
- How forgiveness allows forward movement
- Blame causes parental alienation and unhealthy future relationships
- Co-parenting while divorcing
- Domestic violence police calls
- Couples coaching
- Mediation solutions through individual discussions
- How to react when a divorce has been requested
- How to make divorce a new beginning
- Dating after divorce and introductions to children
forensicpsychologist #transformationalcoach #childhoodtrauma #caregivers #nofaultdivorce #affection #love #communication #compassion #understanding #children #co-parenting #step-father #step-children #blame #blamecycle #delusion #change #therapy #mediation #parentalalienation #forgiveness #humility #selfless #divorce #coaching #couplescoaching #mediator #mediation #divorce #breathe #court #dating
Dr. Loretta Billoups Biography
Dr. Loretta Billoups is a clinician in the state of California. She Dr. Loretta Billoups is a clinician in the state of California. She obtained a Master's degree in Forensic Psychology from Argosy University
and received her doctorate in Applied Clinical Psychology from The Chicago School of Professional Psychology. She was previously a Deputy Sheriff with the Los Angeles County Sheriff's Department for close to twelve years. It is her life experience, education, and career choices that has led her to become both a clinician and transformational coach.
Dr. Billoups has been trained in many modalities and due to this, she has treated depression, anxiety, many variations of trauma, and a host of other mental disorders. She has worked with children, adolescents, adults, and the geriatric population. She also enjoys assisting individuals in reaching their true capacity, maximizing their potential, and reaching their goals. She holds her clients accountable so that their deepest desires and aspirations are now a reality.
www.cultivatingyourlife.com
potential with #relationship & #mental #health #coach #DrLoretttaBilloups https://lnkd.in/dedqt7Mc
On THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast you will learn the following:
- What is happiness?
- Is Happiness defined in the same way by everyone?
- Is it possible to be happy during a divorce?
- Is Happiness a choice or a state of being that we can’t do anything about?
- How self-care is a part of being happy
- How you know what really makes you happy
- The signs of a committed relationship
- How long-distance relationships work or fail
- Authenticity of self-expression and happiness
- Why Happiness and Blame cannot live together
happiness #joy #relationships #commitment #fantasy #author #self-care #longdistancerelationships #blame #self-expression #authenticity #divorce #HappinessHandbooks #podcast #amicabledivorce #THEAmicableDivorceExpert @La-VerneParris @JudithWeigle
LA-VERNE PARRIS Biography
La-Verne Parris, JD, MSc, MEd is a featured author in the health and happiness bestseller, The Wellness Code; and author of the new, humorous and transformational 6-books-in-1 series for women, the Happiness Handbooks (she even illustrated her own book cover!). An award-winning environmental justice/bioethics/science educator, certified life coach, and self-taught author/illustrator, La-Verne enjoys teaching women how to step firmly into their birth-given talents and power.
La-Verne was born in sunny, laid-back Jamaica, but has been a consummate New Yorker on-the-go for most of her trips around the sun. She lives in Mount Vernon, New York with her twin sister and entire family, and loves people-watching and exploring new spots in the world via that last-minute cheap flight. Visit laverneparrislifecoach.com and follow her on social for inspo, laughs, and to contact her; and visit HappinessHeaven.com (site coming soon) for her slogan merch line, designed to help you declare your unbothered right to be happy!
Follow La-Verne
Instagram: @lifecoachlaverne
Twitter: @LaVerne63
Facebook: @LaVerneParrisLifeCoach
Website: laverneparrislifecoach.com
LA-VERNE J. PARRIS
Certified Life Coach
J.D., M.Sc., M.Sc.
917-705-5829
On THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast, I interview Tami Wollensak, CDLP® NMLS #1963450. This is what you will learn:
- Be realistic about keeping and/or refinancing the house
- The relationship between mortgage lending for a refinance of the house in a divorce, and the legal side of the divorce
- How should a settlement agreement be written so that a divorced spouse can refinance the house once the divorce is final
- What it means financially to refinance and keep the house
- What happens if the lower earning spouse who is still living in the house can’t meet the mortgage payment
- The tragedy of leaving Title while still on the mortgage
- What a Due-On-Sale action is based on a Change in Title
- Mortgage lender bases their decision to lend on
- There is a difference between family court versus the mortgage industry rules for responsibility
- How to change Title of the house if both spouses decide to keep the house jointly
- Qualifications for one spouse to refinance the house in a divorce
- How does self-employment effect refinancing the house
- Timing requirements of child and spousal support to refinance the house
- Know all your options when negotiating the house in a divorce settlement
- Make the house a financial decision, not an emotional one
mortgage #refinancing #childsupport #alimony #spousalsupport #divorce #Title #jointTitle #tenantsincommon #mortgagelender #home #house #divorcesettlement #DueOnSale #ChangeinTitle #emotion #self-employment #financialinsecurity #children #coparenting #parents #coparents #certifieddivorcelendingprofessional #freeconsultation #equalcreditopportunityact #mortgage #amicabledivorce
Biography Tami Wollensak is a Certified Divorce Lending Professional (CDLP™) and Senior Mortgage Loan Originator for Oak Leaf Community Mortgage, a Division of Mutual Federal Bank. Tami has worked in the mortgage industry for more than 25 years and is licensed to lend in 46 states. Specializing in Divorce Mortgage Planning, Tami takes a holistic approach to the process of evaluating mortgage options in the context of the overall financial objectives as they relate to divorcing situations prior to settlement for the best outcome. To learn more, visit www.TakeOrLeaveTheHouse.com.
Tami Wollensak, CDLP®
Sr. Mortgage Loan Originator
Certified Divorce Lending Professional
NMLS #1963450
(708) 359-2070
TamiW@MyOakLeaf.com
Website
Request a meeting
Tami Wollensak, CDLP®, Sr. Mortgage Loan Originator, Certified Divorce Lending Professional Oak Leaf Community Mortgage. NMLS ID: 1963450. Equal Housing Lender. Federal Deposit Insurance Corporation.
Here’s what you will learn:
- What a Forensic Accountant does
- How to find the money for your divorce settlement
- How a stay-at-home spouse starts to learn about the family money
- How a stay-at-home spouse can ask about family finances without triggering the other spouse
- How to protect bank accounts in case the earner spouse dies
- How to figure out the family finances through income tax reports
- When to justify bringing on a forensic accountant
- Financial Abuse
- Financial Infidelity
- How to find hidden or overseas accounts
- Difference between Financial Detectives and Forensic Accountants
- Business evaluations of a family business
- Divorce Money Guide
forensicaccountant #financialdetective #money #incometaxreports #financialcoaching #hidden assets #overseasbankaccounts #divorce #divorcesettlement #familyfinances #businessevaluations #DivorceMoneyGuide #stay-at-homespouse #bankaccounts #financialabuse #financialinfidelity
restrictingspending #familybusinesses #podcast #supportgroups #divorcesupportgroups #attorney #mediator #attorneyadvice #groupcoaching #divorcegroupcoaching @TracyCoenen @TheAmicableDivorceExpert
Biography
Tracy has been investigating fraud for more than 25 years, but she didn’t always want to be a forensic accountant. With a dream of one day being a prison warden, Tracy went to Marquette University in Milwaukee, WI to get a criminology degree. A class on financial crime investigations reminded her how much she loved Encyclopedia Brown books as a kid. She continued her criminology degree, but added accounting and economics courses so she could sit for the CPA exam… and here Tracy is, finding money in cases of corporate fraud, high net worth divorce, and other financial shenanigans.
https://www.divorcemoneyguide.com
Instagram: divorcemoneyguide
Here’s what you will learn:
- What child-centered looks and sounds like.
- How to understand the stress that your child is going through from the actual co-parenting schedule to the communication between parents and children.
- How this approach works with one high conflict parent.
- How parents can be child-centered when the parents are still hurting emotionally.
- How a child’s sense of family be reinforced with two households.
- The grieving process for the parents
- Trauma is generational and can transfer from parents to children for generations.
- How children process their parents’ anger
- The importance of children journaling their feelings and experiences
divorce #coparenting #children #divorceabuse #grievingprocess #divorcecoach #bestinterestofthechild #generationaltrauma #communicationstrategies #conflict #trauma #journaling #childcentered #amicabledivorce #podcast #JanetPrice #conflictcommunication #coparentinglife #coaching #coparentingschedule #family
Biography of Janet Price
Janet Price is the CEO of JP Coaching & Consulting, Inc and Founder of Divorce & Thriving Beyond. Janet is a Certified Divorce Specialist and Conscious Co-Parenting Coach who empowers loving parents to rise above the ‘crazy making’ by keeping their kids out of the middle and moving from surviving to thriving!
Janet is passionate about supporting parents divorcing & beyond, transition from the ‘intimate partner relationship’ to their ‘Business Partner Relationship called: The Kids’ so that the children are free to: love both of their parents and be loved by both of their parents.
Janet knows the dynamics of divorcing and co-parenting in a high-conflict environment personally - As a child product of high-conflict divorce and a mother involved in a high conflict coparenting relationship, Janet has first-hand experience on the negative impact & trauma the kids experience when parents unconsciously co-parent and stay stuck in the intimate partner relationship communication loop.
Janet’s Divorce & Thriving Beyond programs provide parents with the tools, skills, strategies, and support to co-parent effectively & transition to their Business Partner Relationship called: The Kids, so that the children experience their birth right, to love and be loved by both parents!
To Learn More about Janet’s Practice go to her website: https://jpcoachingandconsulting.com/divorce-beyond/
To begin getting the support today, join Janet’s private facebook community: Divorce & Beyond: It's Time to Rise, so our Families Thrive!: https://www.facebook.com/groups/divorceandbeyondtimetorise
- Website: https://jpcoachingandconsulting.com/divorce-beyond/
- LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/jp-coaching-and-consulting-inc
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MakingYourDreamsComeAlive/
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jpcoachingandconsulting/
- Twitter: https://twitter.com/JPCoaching2
- Alignable: https://www.alignable.com/malibu-ca/jp-coaching-and-consulting-inc
On this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert Elaine will share her tips on getting parents to be able to communicate with their children in a way that takes the stress out of the parent-child relationship.
Here is what you will learn:
- How to deal with your children while you, the parents, are wildly emotional in your divorce process
- What is Neurodiversity in children?
- How to stop the blame and resentment cycle that parents may be in
- Why the divorce rate is higher when parents have a neuro-diverse child
- How the values that brought you into your current relationship with your partner can be used to reconnect in a co-parenting relationship
- Coach approach to parenting instead of an authoritative approach
- How to work with and communicate with a child who has lots of meltdowns and tantrums
- When the parenting approach changes from giving their children a sense of agency to expecting them to accept an authoritative parenting approach
- Children understand the coach approach to parenting vs the authoritative approach to parenting
- How to get on the same of parenting with your co-parent
- Parenting is an exercise of letting go
- If parents have neuro-diverse children, the parents may also be neuro-diverse
- What to do if both parents aren’t on the same page
parenting #co-parenting #coaching #authoritative #communication #neurodiversity #communication #children #parentingquiz #coachapproach #divorce #family #families #blame #esentment #sanity #complexkids #ImpactParents #TheAmicableDivorceExpert #podcast #divorcepodcast #control #acceptance #collaborativeco-parenting #metacognition #meltdowns #sanityschool @ElaineTaylorKlaus @JudithWeigle
Biography
Elaine Taylor-Klaus, MCC, is first and foremost the mom in an ADHD ++ family of six, and her complex kids are now successful young adults. Professionally, she is a Master Certified Coach – bringing a coach-approach to her work as an internationally recognized speaker, author and educator. The co-founder of the first global coaching organization for parents and professionals of neurodiverse kids, ImpactParents.com, she is a trusted advisor to parents, executives, health care and education professionals. She is also the co-founder of Sanity School®, a neurodiversity-informed behavior training program for parents.
In addition to providing training for parents, ImpactParents has trained and certified hundreds of professionals around the world in neurodiversity-informed coaching skills. Elaine co-authored Parenting ADHD Now! in 2016 and published The Essential Guide to Raising Complex Kids with ADHD, Anxiety and More, in 2020. The Essential Guide will be released in Spanish on Valentine's Day 2023.
Elaine Taylor-Klaus, MCC, CPCC
CEO, ImpactParents.com
Parent company for ImpactADHD®,
ImpactAnxiety & ImpactComplexKids
(404) 231-0390 voice
Author: Parenting ADHD Now! &
The Essential Guide to Raising Complex Kids with ADHD, anxiety, and more
https://impactparents.com/
https://www.facebook.com/ImpactParent/
https://www.instagram.com/impactparents/
https://twitter.com/ImpactParents
https://www.youtube.com/c/ImpactParents
https://impactparents.com/
https://www.facebook.com/ImpactParent/
https://www.instagram.com/impactparents/
https://twitter.com/ImpactParents
https://www.youtube.com/c/ImpactParents
In this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast, Patty McGuire will teach us the following:
- What a Worthiness Coach is and how Self-Worth is lost when going through divorce.
- How Self-Worth affects everything in a person’s life and how to recreate who you are now.
- How to step back from the negativity that divorce showers on you
- Steps to Empowerment.
- The key to self-empowerment
- The power of forgiveness in divorce and self-worth
- How to change the energy in communication
- How to keep your power in threatening messages
- Emotional Divorce
- How to remain positive
- How to define your identity
self-empowerment #self-worth #divorce #TheAmicableDivorceExpert #PattyMcGuire #JudithWeigle #podcast #divorcepodcast #forgiveness #narcissist #communication #worthinesscoach #emotionalenergy #mediation
Biography
Patty McGuire
Founder, Positivity Influencer Coaching
Patty@thepositivityinfluencer.com
www.loveyourmarriageagain.com
Patty McGuire is a self-worth coach who teaches her clients how to create more love and happiness in their lives - one step at a time. Specializing in emotional wellness, divorce recovery and saving marriages, her unique method guides people from fear and pain back to love.
selfworthcoach #divorcerecovery #savingmarriages
In episode 207 of THE Amicable Divorce Expert Judith shares an article from Diane Neumann, a divorce mediator, titled “The Psychological Stages of Divorce”. Diane takes the five emotional stages of divorce and demonstrates how mediation can be used during this time.
You will learn the following:
Stage One: Blaming the Spouse
- a) Mediation fosters a sense of control
- b) Mediation defuses fear of the divorce process
- c) Mediation structures information gathering
- d) Mediation organizes basic living expenses
- e) Mediation contributes to better parenting skills
- f) Mediation works out physical separation details
Stage Two: Mourning the Loss
- a) Mediation refocuses the “poor me” attitude
- b) Mediation helps acknowledge the grief
- c) Mediation acknowledges the reality of the divorce
- d) Mediation structures necessary information gathering
Stage Three: Anger
- a) Mediation defuses anger
- b) Mediation directs the anger energy to focus on specific tasks
- c) Mediation enhances decision-making abilities
- d) Mediation focuses on long-term goals
Stage Four: Being Single
- a) Mediation heightens communication between spouses
- b) Mediation facilitates co-parenting cooperation
- c) Mediation improves relationship interaction
Stage Five: Re-Entry
- a) Mediation provides closure
- b) Mediation emphasizes the future
- c) Mediation is efficient and painless compared to court procedures
TheAmicableDivorceExpert #mediation #co-parenting #anger #grief #blame #settlementdecisions #fear #loss #ElizabethKublerRoss #JudithWeigle #podcast #divorcepodcast #separationanxiety #decision-making #divorce #amicabledivorce #divorcecourt #psychological #parentingskills #communication #livingexpenses
There are two divorces, the Emotional Divorce and the Legal Divorce. The Emotional Divorce comes first, and needs to be settled before the filing in Court begins.
Here's how this works…
Divorce is Emotional, during the lead-up to filing and throughout the filing. Throughout the filing there are so many decisions to make that are extremely important to get right: Custody and Co-Parenting, Child & Spousal Support, Division of Assets & Debts. These decisions cannot be made well while emotional. The question becomes, “Can the emotion be diminished or controlled that become the backdrop to decision-making, and that can be the reason for bad decision-making?” The answer is, “Yes!”
In this episode you will learn more about the Emotional Divorce and its significance in your divorce experience if you would like the best outcome possible for your entire family. Judith will give you real life examples of what to do and what not to do in a variety of situations from making a mutual decision to divorce, to being surprised by being served with divorce papers, to having lawyers involved in representation.
emotions #grieving #co-parenting #court #griefprocess #mediation #podcast #divorcepodcast #amicabledivorce #personalitydisorders #divorcinganarcissist #GoodKarmaDivorce #JudgeMicheleLowrance #therapy #alimony #spousalsupport #childsupport #detachment #settlement
Thank you for joining me in this weekly podcast. The goal is to enable all of you to make changes in the trajectory of your divorce from acrimonious to amicable with my revolutionary approach to divorce: The Recipe for a Heart-Healthy Divorce™.
The four ingredients to this approach are:
-
Settle the Emotional Divorce before Settling the Legal Divorce
-
Compartmentalize Time
-
Communication for Conflict
-
A Self-Care Program with Laughter
I give a brief explanation of each ingredient in this episode. If just one of these ingredients is successfully accomplished by only one spouse, the trajectory of your divorce will change from seriously acrimonious to better. And sometimes, better is the best it can be.
Thank you for listening all year so that you can learn how to use divorce to grow as an individual and as a parent.
Happy New Year!
divorce #podcast #divorcepodcast #amicabledivorce #selfcare #laughter #communication #conflict #narcissism #emotionaldivorce #legaldivorce #divorcefiling #coparenting #highconflictpersonalities #BIFF
In this episode you will learn the following:
- Skills to deal with divorce
- Skills to prevent parental alienation
- Generational trauma and the impact on your children
- Divorce abuse and its impact on the children
- Communication strategies for conflict
- How a woman’s life changes when going from working outside the home to being a stay-at-home mom
- Support for the children
- Aspects of being a good parent and co-parenting
- What working in the ‘best interest of the child’ mean
- What children go through while their parents are divorcing
- Support groups for children in a divorce
- Another way of looking at co-parenting that could change co-parenting challenges
divorce #coparenting #children #divorceabuse #grief cycles #divorcecoach #bestinterestofthechild #generationaltrauma #parentalalienation #communicationstrategies #conflict #amicabledivorce #podcast #JanetPrice #conflictcommunication #stayathomemoms
Biography of Janet Price
Janet Price is the CEO of JP Coaching & Consulting, Inc and Founder of Divorce & Thriving Beyond. Janet is a Certified Divorce Specialist and Conscious Co-Parenting Coach who empowers loving parents to rise above the ‘crazy making’ by keeping their kids out of the middle and moving from surviving to thriving!
Janet is passionate about supporting parents divorcing & beyond, transition from the ‘intimate partner relationship’ to their ‘Business Partner Relationship called: The Kids’ so that the children are free to: love both of their parents and be loved by both of their parents.
Janet knows the dynamics of divorcing and co-parenting in a high-conflict environment personally - As a child product of high-conflict divorce and a mother involved in a high conflict coparenting relationship, Janet has first-hand experience on the negative impact & trauma the kids experience when parents unconsciously co-parent and stay stuck in the intimate partner relationship communication loop.
Janet’s Divorce & Thriving Beyond programs provide parents with the tools, skills, strategies, and support to co-parent effectively & transition to their Business Partner Relationship called: The Kids, so that the children experience their birth right, to love and be loved by both parents!
To Learn More about Janet’s Practice go to her website: https://jpcoachingandconsulting.com/divorce-beyond/
To begin getting the support today, join Janet’s private facebook community: Divorce & Beyond: It's Time to Rise, so our Families Thrive!: https://www.facebook.com/groups/divorceandbeyondtimetorise
- Website: https://jpcoachingandconsulting.com/divorce-beyond/
- LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/jp-coaching-and-consulting-inc
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MakingYourDreamsComeAlive/
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jpcoachingandconsulting/
- Twitter: https://twitter.com/JPCoaching2
- Alignable: https://www.alignable.com/malibu-ca/jp-coaching-and-consulting-inc
On episode 203 of THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast, you will learn the following:
- When and why people go from behaving respectfully towards one another to criticizing each other and speaking disrespectfully to each other once married.
- How to define a healthy love relationship.
- The essential need of people when they get into relationships and marriage.
- What things changed for you in your understanding of what a good love life was after you left home and engaged in romantic relationships.
- Why the divorce rate is 50% first marriages, 60% second marriages, and 70% third marriages end in divorce.
- Why someone is reluctant to make a commitment, and what you should do if that’s you.
- What makes love mysterious, hard to recognize, and difficult to get back on track.
- What “love at first sight” is.
- Question to ask if in a divorce: What did I contribute to the divorce?
- The importance of grieving a marriage before entering another relationship.
- The importance of understanding your family history and what you learned from your parents’ relationship.
divorce #relationships #lovelife #divorcerate #familyhistory #commitment #communication #acceptance #behavioralpatterns #lovelifelearningcenter #DrThomasJordan #grief
Dr. Thomas Jordan is a clinical psychologist and psychoanalyst in private practice in New York City. He is on the faculty of NYU’s Postdoctoral Program in Psychoanalysis, author of Learn to Love: Guide to Healing Your Disappointing Love Life and founder of LoveLifeLearningCenter.com. Dr. Jordan specializes in the treatment of unhealthy love lives and has been studying them for over 30 years.
Links:
Business Name: Love Life Learning Center
Email: drtmjordan@gmail.com
Website: https://lovelifelearningcenter.com/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Dr.ThomasJordan/?ref=tn_tnmn
Twitter: https://twitter.com/LLLearningCtr
IG: https://www.instagram.com/lovelifelearningcenter/
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/drthomasjordan
In this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert, you will learn the following:
- What Marital Mediation is
- When divorce is the result of Marital Management
- Communication Skills and Conflict Management Strategies are keys in divorce
- Where lawyers fit in the divorce process
- The players in the management of the divorce process
- The three important elements of communication: Tone of Words, Body Language, Words
- The most common mistakes to avoid in divorce
- E + R = O (Event + Respond = Outcome)
- Where the need for control comes from
- Where does resolving the issues for divorce fit into the emotional and business sides of divorce and settlement discussions
- When in the divorce process is a Divorce Coach hired
- How to avoid post-divorce regrets
- You are not alone in how you feel during divorce
- How the challenges in divorce can make you stronger
- Most common mistakes to avoid in divorce
JenniferWarrenMedwin #DivorceCoach #Author #Divorce #DivorceMediation #Communication #Conflict #DivorceMistakes #SettlementRegrets #Challenges #Podcast #AmicableDivorce #Post-DivorceRegrets #BodyLanguage #BillEddy #BIFF #EmotionalDivorce #Control #FlexibleThinking
About the Author:
Jennifer Warren Medwin, MS is a CDC Certified Divorce Coach, Supreme Court of Florida Family Mediator, and a Certified Marital Mediator. Her private practice in Pinecrest, Miami is called Seeking Empowerment: Clarity through Partnership. Jennifer specializes in working alongside individuals and couples who are contemplating divorce and are fearful of high conflict and with those who hope to save their marriages. She partners with clients to develop the clarity, confidence, courage, conflict management strategies, and communication skills they need to move through the process. Jennifer uses her knowledge of coaching and mediation to help her clients emotionally prepare for the dissolution of their marriages or the reconciliation of their relationships in the most organized, time efficient, and productive manner. Additionally, Jennifer is Collaboratively trained, a member of the National Association of Divorce Professionals (NADP), a participant on the SupportPay Advisory Council, a member of the Amicable Divorce Network, an instructor at Family and Co-parenting Enrichment Services (F.A.C.E.S.), a committee member of KidSide, and a contributing writer for Your Tango, Thrive Global, and OurFamilyWizard. She is also the author of Strategies & Tips from a Divorce Coach: A Roadmap to Move Forward. Jennifer's approach to divorce coaching and mediation is one that provides clients with guidance and compassion through a difficult time in their lives.
Jen@seekingempowerment.com
www.seekingempowerent.com
Instagram, Facebook, and LinkedIn: @jenseekingempowermenthttps://www.amazon.com/Strategies-Tips-Divorce-Coach-Roadmap/dp/1736854410/ref=sr_1_3?crid=1996RCJKQ4YMR
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/strategies-and-tips-from-a-divorce-coach-jennifer-warren-medwin/1140843462?ean=9781736854402
The celebrity divorces under the microscope are Maria Shriver and Arnold Schwarzenegger (10 ½ years/Emotional Divorce was important); Bethenny Frankel and Jason Hoppy (8 years/Conflict Communication skills were needed); Brad Pitt and Angeline Jolie (4-5 years/Was it custody or ego prolonging the divorce settlement).
In this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast, you will learn the following:
- Divorces can take even longer than the Shriver/Schwarzenegger 10-year divorce
- Budgets need to change to accommodate the divorce
- Compromise as a key to settling the divorce
- The word “fair” will get you nowhere
- That there are two divorces, the Emotional Divorce and the Legal Divorce
- Why the Emotional Divorce has to run its course
- What a “Status Only” divorce means
- No one knows how long a divorce will take, but the ones in control are the spouses, not the court and not the lawyers
- Conflict Communication skills are vital to dealing with an acrimonious spouse
celebritydivorces #angelinajolie #bradpitt #bethennyfrankel #jasonhoppy #mariashriver #arnoldschwarzenegger #childcustody #emotionaldivorce #legaldivorce #attorneys #communication #conflict #divorcesettlement #amicable #acrimonious #compromise #statusonlydivorce #fair #spouse #BIFF #BillEddy #JudithWeigle #personalitydisorders
This episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast is about workplace burnout for women and men who are also going through divorce.
This is what you will learn:
-
Burnout can lead to thoughts of suicide.
-
What leads to burnout? How does this specifically address working mothers?
-
The conditions in the workplace and the personal lives of people going through divorce both factor into overall burnout.
-
What is Parental Burnout?
-
How responsible is the employer in creating burnout?
-
What is proximity bias?
-
The Human Group is about humanizing the workplace. How?
-
What are the leadership skills necessary to address and prevent burnout?
-
Preventing burnout must be modeled by the leadership of an organization, along with middle management who can be the most burned out. How is this done?
-
Productively suffers when workers come to work under stress and emotional pain.
-
Children are even affected at school when their parents are in burnout. How can this change at home and at school?
-
How did Covid affect burnout by working from home?
-
Empathy, Emotional Intelligence, Social Skills in the ability to connect with the team to humanize the health and welfare of their workers.
-
What is Psychological Safety?
-
How does self-awareness influence leaders, and biases of leaders?
-
The importance of coaching in the study of behavior science to mitigate unconscious and conscious bias.
-
How does the feeling of failure due to divorce impact work productivity?
burnout #workplaceburnout #divorce #empathy #emotionalintelligence #leadership #parentalburnout #leadershipskills #podcast #psychologicalsafety #suicideideation #diversity #loyalty #trust #safety #groupcoaching #vulnerability #coaching #mentalhealthcrises #TheHumanGroup #Dr.JacquelineKerr #KristieRible #TheAmicableDivorceExpertpodcast #community #corporateleaders #courage #listeningskills #behaviorchange #unconsciousbias #biastraining #brainfog #workplacegenderbalance #performanceindicators #advocacy #businessadvocacy
Biographies of Dr. Jacqueline Kerr and Kristie Rible
Dr Jacqueline Kerr is a mom, behavior change scientist and burnout survivor. She hosts the podcast Overcoming working mom burnout. Her TEDx talk is How to stop burnout before it starts. She is the Head of Behavior Science at The Huuman Group and provides support to companies on having impact through evidence-based behavior change, understanding and solving multi-level public health problems such as burnout, and using implementation science to improve program effectiveness.
Dr Kerr is in the top 1% of most cited scientists worldwide. She was a public health professor until 2018 when she burned out. Dr Kerr’s work is included in the Center for Disease Control and Prevention’s Community Health Guide and she has received over $56 million in funding from the National Institutes of Health and the American Heart Association working on interventions in community settings such as neighborhoods, schools, workplaces, and retirement communities. She also received over $10 million in funding focusing on women’s health. She has been passionate about age friendly cities and was a consultant to both the AARP and SANDAG.
You can connect with Dr Kerr through her:
Website: www.DrJacquelineKerr.com
Podcast: Overcoming working mom burnout
TEDx talk: https://youtu.be/9YY0gVnVPoQ
Stand up comedy: https://youtu.be/Ulx5VNK4E08
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dr-jacqueline-kerr-a62581173/
As founder and CEO of The Huuman Group™ (a leadership, coaching, and culture consultancy), Kristi is dedicated to humanizing the workplace by building caring leaders for thriving cultures. Caring leaders understand that the future of work demands flexibility for successful work+life integration, psychological safety, and full a representation of our collective humanity: diverse, equitable, and inclusive.
Her international leadership experience spans more than twenty years of working across technology and consumer products for both public and startup ventures throughout the US, Latin America, Europe, Asia, and Africa. To every consulting, teaching, or coaching engagement, she brings an intercultural and multidisciplinary perspective.
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kristierible/
LinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/company/the-huuman-group™/
Instagram: @kristierible and @thehumangroup
Twitter: @kristierible
www.thehumangroup.com
Episode 199: Integrity, Leadership and Goal-Setting in Marriage w/Richard Melancon, CPA, Author, Speaker
In this episode you will learn the following:
-
Integrity-based Leadership and how Integrity and Leadership are present in marriage
-
Success in Marriage: Matching Values even though spouses may think and behave differently, they want the same goals on Money, retirement, relationships monogamy marriage
-
The shift from dating to marriage: Communicate differently but values same. Problem-solving is different but goals the same
-
Is your marriage goal-based?
-
Financial challenges and goal-setting and the importance of living within your means
-
Why money breaks marriages up and how to prevent this
-
Financial reality in goal-setting and how it successfully works
-
Inappropriate use of money is a symptom of a bad marriage
-
The symptoms that inappropriate expenditure of money reveals
-
How to create a better future financially, married or divorced
-
When bankruptcy should be considered
-
Parents are financial role models to their children
-
What place does money have in your opinion of yourself
-
How is staying in a job that isn’t really satisfying similar to staying in a marriage that isn’t really satisfying
-
How developing a business is similar to building a family
-
Success in your attitude shows in your bank account
-
“Dating for any other reason than finding a spouse isn’t a date. It’s just a good time.”
integrity #leadership #goal-setting #marriage #divorce #finances #financialinsecurity #bankruptcy #money #parenting #rolemodel #communication #marriagesuccess #dating #similarvalues #values #CPA #author #speaker
BIOGRAPHY FOR
RICHARD A. MÉLANÇON, CPA
Richard Mélançon has 25+ years of experience as a Certified Public Accountant, Business Consultant, Professional Speaker, and author. As a business consultant, he has worked with companies from coast – to – coast to improve operations, enhance security, identify workflow improvements, build an ethical culture, and improve staff productivity.
Mr. Melancon has published three books since 2009. His first book, “You Can Afford the Good Life,” is a personal money management guide for people who are in financial crisis. His second book “18 Secrets to Unlock Profits and Inspire Employees,” helps companies to implement “Best Practices” to operate an effective business. His third book, “Integrity-Based Leadership,” helps business owners align their personal values with the corporate mission to reduce stress, build team spirit with employees, and expand profits significantly. Mr. Melancon has developed a professional speaking platform for these topics for groups and workshop settings.
Richard A. Melancon, CPA
4436 Glendale Street
Metairie, LA 70006
VOICE 504-780-909 1
FAX 877-886-4455
E-mail: Richard@ramcpa.com
Website: www.ramcpa.com
www.Linkedin.com/in/Richardmelancon
www.Facebook.com/richardcpa
www.Twitter.com/richardcpa
This episode explores the realities of making a good mediation. It’s simple: Be Honest, Be Empathetic, Be Human
You will learn:
-
How to be frank
-
How to allow the mediator to move the discussion forward
-
How to negotiate
-
How not to be held hostage in divorce
-
How to think through and prioritize the division of assets
-
How not to be held hostage in divorce mediation
-
How to recognize a power imbalance in order to mediate
-
Difference between options vs advise and move beyond impasse
-
That your mediator can identify compromises that the parties can’t hear for themselves
-
Mediators have to come to the mediation with an open mind
mediation #mediator #divorce #divorcemediation #negotiation #hostage #impasse #assets #negotiate #hostagenegotiation #powerimbalance #honesty #openmindedness #compromise #activelistening #mediate #divorcesettlement
Joseph George Biography
Joseph George is an intelligent and astute businessman with an innovative and motivational mindset. His passion for helping people shows in his body of work. He is an independent, full-time Supreme Court-appointed mediator and arbitrator. As an arbitrator, his role is to ensure the parties get a fair and effectively managed proceeding. His talents as a mediator, helps to guide the parties to a mutually satisfactory dispute settlement. The combination of his past industry experience in contract negotiations and his skills in crisis management makes him an ideal mediator or arbitrator for matters involving construction or employment, as well as complex business disputes. Both roles are crucial components in his position as a founding partner with the George & George ADR Group.
Apart from the business world Mr. George has a meticulous work-life balance, as he is a devout family man. He currently resides in Jacksonville, Florida with his family and is very hands on with his autistic child. He works closely with an individualized education program (IEP) which helps him to address any therapy for speech, behavior, or sensory concerns his child may have. He is also a promoter of community service and is an avid supporter of community groups designed to inspire and motivate women of all ages.
Joseph George
Executive Director
George & George ADR Group
https://georgeandgeorgeadr.com/
Florida Supreme Court Certified County Mediator
Florida Supreme Court Qualified Arbitrator
License Notary & E-notary
Certified Loan Signing Agent
Certified Paralegal/Legal Assistant
Certified Cannabis Mediator
Certified ADA Coordinator/ Subject Matter Expert
Certified Human Resource Professional
CERTIFIED RECRUITING PROFESSIONAL (CRP)
830-13 A1A N Suite 122
Ponte Vedra Bch, FL 32082
904-553-2540
You will learn how gender identity affects the divorce in the following ways:
-
Children have a transition to make to accept the nuances of gender switches with a parent
- Male to female didn’t want his children calling him
- Obligation of the parent to make sure the child is protected through this process
-
Transitioning genders is sensitive and justifiably selfish, but with consequences of attachment to the children
-
The variety of examples of gender identity is cross-dressing, transgenderism, nonbinary, bisexual
-
Religion in a gender identity divorce is an issue
-
Full disclosure isn’t always given to all relatives for a while
-
Family therapy can help, especially in a co-parenting relationship
-
Mediation is a better route to go in gender identity cases because of the potential biases of the Judge assigned to the case
-
Adoption can be affected in a same sex or alternative sex marriage
-
Changing the language on forms regarding gender identification has started for the adults and children
-
Co-parenting can be affected if one parent cannot accept the transition of the other parent in co-parenting time
-
The importance of pausing the legal divorce until the emotions of the parents and the family are settled
gender #transgender #nonbinary #transsexual #heterosexual #homosexual #gendenridentity #divorce #gay #straight #gendercomplexities #coparenting #mediation #trial #JudgesBias #courtorder #GregLake #MeganSpomer #podcast #divorcepodcast #amicabledivorce
Biographies
Meagan Spomer, Esq. of Nebraska Legal Group was a prosecutor for Douglas County Child Support Enforcement. It was there that she not only gained invaluable and extensive trial experience, she also saw how wrong things can go in family law cases. Having seen the worst, Megan is committed to providing the very best representations for her clients.
Meagan co-founded the Nebraska Family Law Organization, an organization focused on increasing students’ interest in family law, as well as connecting established attorneys with law students. The organization has succeeded in bringing mentoring to students and attracting quality young lawyers to the practice of divorce and family law.
Greg Lake, Esq. of Nebraska Legal Group focuses his practice on matters with contested custody, complex financial inquiries, and unique legal questions which arise throughout divorce and custody proceedings. Greg has two young children of his own and understands the challenges that parents face when they are suddenly faced with the fact that they will not be able to see their children daily, must begin budgeting on a single income, or the many other challenges which may arise during a custody proceeding. Greg’s passion for family extends beyond the Courtroom as he volunteered to coach his son’s soccer team where he teaches teamwork, discipline, and patience. When not coaching, Greg and his family spend time putting together puzzles, going to the Zoo, and watching Husker games.
Greg applies the same principles of teamwork, discipline, and patience to the practice of law which assists clients in making the best decisions for their case. Greg excels in simplifying the complex legal questions not only for his clients but the Court as well. Taken together, these fundamentals help client’s in making decisions that will impact their financial future, and most importantly, their future with children.
Everybody struggles with having a career and raising a family. Either one spouse works and the other raises the family. Or both spouses work and one person raises the family. It’s a rare family in which both parents work and both contribute equally to raising the family.
Aspects to a Relationship that Make it Strong:
- Mutual Commitment to a Goal of Raising a Family
- Sharing Family Duties
- Career: Two-career household with One Career more public than the other career, essentially creating the appearance that one career was more important or made more money
- If they both had careers, it appeared that Gisele spent more time raising the children. Why? Since she made more money than Tom.
I want to talk about the energy people bring to the marriage, and the energy people use in the divorce. I’m using the relationship of Tom Brady and Gisele Bundchen to show that their energy was united until Tom reneged on retirement, and Giselle stopped showing up for the games, resulting in a losing season so far for Tom Brady.
When Tom and Giselle met, Giselle was wealthier than Tom, and still is, accumulating her wealth as a successful supermodel, starting as a Victoria’s secret runway Angel. She was making more money than Tom. Then Tom’s career started to take off, and the deal apparently was that Giselle would be a stay-at-home mom and Tom would be the breadwinner. Giselle was at every game with the growing family. As Tom approached 45 years of age, I believe I read that Tom was going to stay home and invest more time in raising the two children. When Tom unretired the shit hit the fan. Giselle stopped coming to Tom’s games and Tom has not been winning. I mean he lost tot the Pittsburgh Steelers, my team, last week. That’s pretty bad.
I’m doing a speech on Presenteeism for corporate America, a term used to describe people being at work but unproductive due to emotional pain. The title of the speech is Driven to Distraction. I think this applies to Tom Brady and his unproductive season so far.
My point is that there was an energy that helped fuel Tom’s performance on the field with Giselle at the games. They were a team, too. It seems that when that team disbanded, it affected his other team, the football team.
tombrady #giselebundchen #commitment #marriage #energy #relationship #parenting #familyduties #family #career #divorce #teamwork #podcast #divorcepodcast #happiness
On THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast this week we speak with David Stolz about why he wrote a book for women regarding financial decisions in a divorce settlement, how to know if the financial decisions negotiated created an equal distribution of assets and debts for both spouses, and clarification on filing taxes once a divorce has been filed.
Here’s what was discussed:
-
Why the focus on women and divorce
-
When required to file other than “married Jointly”
-
How state and federal laws impact your income or asset division when filing “married single or Head of Household”
-
Discuss tax implications with your accountant before filing the divorce settlement to insure the settlement is equal after taxes
-
When to register a divorce with Human Resources when a pension is involved
-
Why a court settlement won’t take tax implications into consideration
-
Options in filing taxes with a Legal Separation filing
-
Debt obligations of one spouse for the other while married
-
What an Equalization Payment is and Equal Distribution of Assets
-
A good case for mediation as opposed to court
-
Emotions and how they can impact bad Legal Decisions
-
How to financially function before divorce filing and while taking care of their emotions
-
How emotions, money, and decision-making work together
-
Monthly pension payments vs lump sum payout
financialadvice #divisionofassets #finances #financialanalyst #certifieddivorcefinancialanalyst #mediation #divorce #equalizationpayment #legalseparation #taxfilingoptions #pensions #money #QDRO #emotionaldecisionmaking
Biography of David Stolz
David Stolz is a principal in Stolz and Associates, a wealth management firm outside of Seattle, WA. He has more than 20 years of experience working with high net worth individuals in the areas of tax, and divorce financial planning. David has written and contributed to various articles on tax, financial and divorce planning in numerous publications including: New York Times, CBS News, CNBC, Washington, Journal of Accountancy and others.
David and his wife live in Tacoma, WA and enjoy the sunshine of Hawaii as well as adventure travel. They share five kids and a growing number of grandkids.
https://www.david-stolz.com
Facebook: davidstolzauthor
Instagram: stolz_dave
- What is Mediation and How Does it Work?
- Is the mediator like a judge and makes decisions for the couple?
- When does a mediator venture an opinion or a suggestion in resolving outstanding issues in a settlement?
- What is external vs. Internal information?
- Who has a good profile for mediation?
- Why are you here?
- Willingness / motivation
- Who is wrong for mediation?
- Reactive devaluation
- Power balance
- No legal advice or understanding of the law
- When is mediation right for the couple?
- When is mediation wrong for the couple?
- Divorce is a people problem with a legal consequence
- Have you ever stopped a mediation because it appeared to be fruitless, or because of a power imbalance?
- 9 Tips to hire the right divorce attorney.
About Katherine:
Katherine Eisold Miller is an attorney on a mission to change how people divorce and help them divorce with dignity. She is the founder of the Miller Law Group and a Director and Trainer with the Center for Understanding in Conflict. She has been working in the field of family law for more than 35 years as an attorney as well as a mediator. She hosts the radio show/podcast Divorce Dialogues. She is co-author of the #1 Amazon bestseller “A Cup of Coffee with 10 of the Top Divorce Attorneys in the United States” and the author of the “New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce.” Her many media accolades include interviews on CBS New York, NBC New York and features in New York Times (2), US News & World Report, ABC News, Money Magazine, Splitopia, Fox News, Huffpost, and BravoTV.
DivorceMediation #Mediator #Conflict #Coparenting #CoparentingwithaNarcissist #BravoTV #CollaborativeDivorce #DivorceLawyers #DivorceAttorneys #DivorceCourt #Compromise #Respect #DivorcewithDignity #AttorneyKatherineMiller #MediatorKatherineMiller #MillerLawGroup #DivorceLitigation #AmicableDivorce #CenterforUnderstandinginConflict #DivorceDialogues #NewYorkTimes #FoxNews #USNews&WorldReport #ABCNews #MoneyMagazine #Huffpost #Splitopia
In THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast, we feature Eda Rosa, LLC a Ft. Lauderdale legal professional who has a concierge paralegal service for attorneys, has her own podcast, Let’s Talk Legal, and is an author of two books that support honesty and ethics in legal services.
Here’s what you’ll learn:
-
The relationship between attorneys and paralegals
-
The role of paralegals in a law firm
-
The human side of working in a legal relationship
-
The right way attorneys should provide service to clients
-
How law schools brainwash students to want to fight s attorneys
-
What attorneys can and should do to better represent their clients, and promote a more positive image in the legal industry
-
The relationship between Humanity and Law
-
The intention is to provide excellent service in the face of being human
-
How to choose the right attorney
-
Trust your gut when hiring legal professionals
-
Signs that your attorney is doing more than necessary just to charge you
-
Types of questions to ask your attorney to know the status of your case
-
Resources to teach you how legal services should be provided
-
Signs that your attorney is doing less than they should
-
The client’s role in an attorney-client relationship
-
Options in hiring legal services other than attorneys
attorneys #lawyers #paraprofessionals #paralegals #ethics #honesty #litigation #court #familylaw #legaladvice #EdaRosa #Let’sTalkLegalPodcast #attorney-clientrelationship
Biography of Eda Rosa
Eda Rosa accrued 19 years of professional excellence in the legal profession. Early in her career she was a full-time paralegal for law firms across Florida’s tri-county area. She has gained valuable experience supporting attorneys nationwide by efficiently managing the caseload process, delivering a trustworthy product with supporting legal research and enhancing client relations. Additionally, Rosa gained practical knowledge in foreclosure/real estate law, personal injury, legal research, title work, and business/corporate law.
Eda Rosa, LLC. Is a concierge service providing legal support to law firms.
Let’s Talk Legal and Behind the Oath-Experiences of Paralegals are Rosa’s two books.
Let’s Talk Legal is also the name of Eda’s podcast.
www.EdaRosaLLC.com
On this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast we feature Khloe Kardashian in our celebrity divorce series and focus on the issues of Trust and Forgiveness.
You will learn:
-
What Trust is
-
How Forgiveness factors into the healing of breached Trust
-
The difference between Misplaced Trust and Earned Trust
-
Why it matters that people take time to learn about one another before trusting in them and marrying them
-
How ego plays into someone’s ability to be trusted with monogamy
-
Cheating doesn’t just mean sexually
-
Where a foundation of Trust comes from
-
When there is an irreputable breakdown in a relationship with children to co-parent and how that works
-
That accepting the reality of our intended partners is essential
-
How to go from betrayal to gratitude
khloekardashian #trust #misplacedtrust #earned trust #forgiveness #tristanthompson #lamarodom #marriage #divorce #coparents #coparenting #therapy #fallinginlove #selfrespect #infidenlity #relationshipfraud #judithweigle #divorcepodcast #amicabledivorce
In the world of relationships and marriage, people look for that one relationship that completes them, that makes them happy, and that last forever. But divorce statistics suggest otherwise. Choosing the right person and leaving that person at the right time are essential to living an authentic life.
You will learn how to:
- Approach marriage and relationships in a nontraditional way
- Gage the energy and dynamic of a relationship and the value of that for a strong relationship
- When to know if the marriage can and should be saved
- How did you learn to choose relationships, and what did you learn about those choices
- Learn from the past relationship to choose better future ones
- Be honest and authentic in relationship choices
- Differentiate being a victim from how people assess their own power
- Find your sense of self-worth and self-esteem
- Understand that Men need to be Needed and Women want to be Wanted
- Recognize the signs that the relationship isn’t right, and what to do if that happens
- Use your energy to live your best life and have your best relationships
- Recognize if you’re open to receiving the gifts of life
- Understand that love and money are the same energy
- Reassess what marriage means
- How to show up for yourself and be the authentic person you are
- Break free of social constructs in relationship expectations
- Have a strong relationship without Cheating and leading Double Lives (financial ruin, addiction, adultery)
- Understand the difference between Values Alignment vs Vibration Alignment
- Understand that we are never rejected; we repel the relationships causing them to change dynamic
Biography of Deborah Peters
Deborah Peters of the Neuro-Engineering Institute is a Psychologist, Mind-Set Expert, Business Coach, and host of The Journey of the Mastery of Your Mind. Deborah offers individual coaching, retreats, workshops and keynotes for continued education and personal and business success.
www.neimind.com
neuroengineering #mindset #marriage #relationships #divorce #values #authenticity #energyrealignment #valuesrealignment #personalpower #debroahpeters #judithweigle #theamicabledivorceexpert #theJourneyoftheMasteryofYourMind #energy #mindenergy #personalenergy
Wendy Tamis Robbins, Esq. suffered from anxiety in childhood that continues into her adult life. Wendy will share what it was like going through anxiety and panic attacks as a child, through a law career, a first marriage, with the journey she describes in her book The Box, and in her second marriage.
You will learn:
-
What it’s like growing up in an emotionally and physically volatile home
-
How anxiety is an outgrowth of a volatile home life
-
How anxiety pervades someone’s life
-
The difference between anxiety and panic disorders
-
There are different types of anxiety, manifested in different ways
-
How to deal with the triggers that create panic attacks
-
Why people fight for a failed marriage – at first
-
How to deal with the fear of getting divorced
-
How do you know IF you have a failed marriage is you are a child of a failed parental relationship
-
Falling in Love vs Landing in Love
-
The importance of sharing ourselves with our potential spouses before marriage
-
Why children cannot be a bonding mechanism between spouses
-
How we build new boxes to hide in emotionally
-
Creating a facade to cover up our insecurities, imperfections, and lack of real connection in a relationship
-
The difference between growing apart and not growing together from the start
-
When do you know when you really know someone
-
How to break free from the emotional Box people create for themselves
-
The importance of authenticity and expressing vulnerabilities
-
How shame limits vulnerability and authenticity
-
How a failed marriage can lead to a better life
anxiety #panicattacks #wendytamisrobbins #theBox #mentalhealth #divorce #fallinginlove #authenticity #vulnerability #trust #fear #failedmarriage #step-mom #relationships #communication #panicdisorders #love #marriage #emotionalbarriers #drbrenebrown #brenebrown #shame #unlovable #abandonment #JudithWeigle #TheAmicableDivorceExpert #podcast #divorcepodcast #amicabledivorce #intuition
Wendy Tamis Robbins, Esq. Biography
Wendy Tamis Robbins is an attorney in Boston, an Anxiety Coach, Author of The Box, Speaker, and host of the Perfectly Panicked podcast.
Wendy has suffered from anxiety and panic attacks all her life. Part of this mental health condition came from her upbringing and part her own issue with authentically expressing herself. As her first marriage ended, Wendy started getting in touch with the reasons for anxiety and panic, and set about changing her life.
She wrote The Box to metaphorically express how she felt in terms of limiting her vulnerability by being less than authentic. Wendy broke out of the imaginary box she put herself in to protect and shield her from the world. The Box is a book that represents Wendy’s freedom from anxiety.
Wendy also provides workshops to help others get out of their self-imposed boxes, address and deal with anxiety and panic attacks, and live an authentic life full of joy.
Facebook: wendytamisrobbinsthebox.com
IG: wendy_tamis_robbins/
LinkedIn: wendy-tamis-robbins-bg806g1b8/
Twitter: WTRobbins
You Tube: UCYicry8lg7dZDVmnWBHLfJg
In this episode you will learn the following:
- What is Burnout?
- Why do people become burned out?
- What are the signs of Burnout?
- How does Burnout express itself at home and at work?
- How do people determine where Burnout is coming from?
- How can people address Burnout?
- What are some behavioral changes people can make to go from Burnout to Balance?
- How can those of us seeing a loved one or co-worker who might be experiencing Burnout help them?
Dr. Drea Letamendi Biography
Dr. Drea Letamendi (she/her/ella) is a licensed psychologist and consultant who specializes in organizational development, mental health training, and corporate wellness. She is a fellow at the Institute of Coaching at the Harvard School of Medicine affiliate, McLean, and serves as the Director of Resilience at UCLA, where she designs and activates mental health initiatives and prepares leaders with crisis intervention and field response protocols.
As a wellbeing strategist, her passion is fostering curiosity, enthusiasm, and capacity for enhancing work-life health, belongingness, and equanimity among ambitious teams. Dr. Drea is a TEDx speaker and delivered TED sessions on "Resilience and Media During a Pandemic," as part of the special COVID-19 series. She’s published several articles and chapters about the positive impacts of media storytelling on mental health, and this work has been featured in the Atlantic, the Guardian, the Los Angeles Times, and on Disney+. Her podcast, "The Arkham Sessions," examines pop culture and its impact on our mental health.
Email: drdreapsychology@gmail.com
Web: drdreapsychology.com
Social media: @ArkhamAsylumDoc
burnout #lifebalance #workplaceburnout #divorceburnout #depression #selfcare #wellnessprograms #behavioralchange #DrDreaLetamendi #TheAmicableDivorceExpert #TheAmicableDivorceExpertpodcast #TheArkhamSessions #JudithMWeigle #JudithWeigle #podcast #divorcepodcast #mentalhealth #mentalhealthchallenges
Kind of lost on whether Kelly Clarkson and Brandon Blackstock are actually divorced yet, but the news report is that they are at least back to amicable co-parenting on the Montana ranch. The ranch was in the settlement dispute.
The topics for discussion on this episode are:
-
Amicable co-parenting post litigation
-
The Difficulties in a relationship when the woman out earns the man
-
Spousal Support vs Child Support
What you will learn is:
-
Why it’s hard to amicably co-parent when in the middle of divorce litigation
- How to get back to amicable co-parenting
- The importance of amicable co-parenting
- The damage to the children when co-parents fight
-
The issues in divorce when the woman out earns the man
- How our culture still views the earning capacity of each gender
- Why men who make less than women (even if they have a very respectable salary) ask for more than the law allows in the division of assets
- What men should understand in a high net worth divorce settlement if their wives out earn them
-
The intricacies in evaluating Spousal Support
- Lots of factors go into the evaluation of spousal support
- How different states view spousal support
- When spousal support might not be assigned
-
Child Support pays for what?
- What the monthly amount of child support pays for
- The average range of child support
- Why it’s important not to argue about where child support is spent
Here’s what you’ll learn:
.How to have an amicable divorce
.How to find and hire amicable attorneys
.How to reign in time and expense when hiring an attorney
.Why being argumentative doesn’t work
.Who comprises the Amicable Divorce Network
.How to become part of the roster for Amicable Divorce Professionals
.How the Amicable Divorce Network vets for professionals on their list
.How to go from high conflict to amicable again
.How attorneys can deal with their client’s emotions
.How professionals in divorce band together to help their mutual clients
.Collaborative Law and a collaborative team approach
.How The Amicable Divorce Network can work within your budget
.Who controls the attorney-client relationship. Shhhh, it’s the client!
.Fighting isn’t necessary to resolve a marriage
.Lying is a waste of everyone’s time and money
.How to understand the emotions of divorce and the impact emotion has on decision-making
amicabledivorce #divorcelawyer #collaborativelaw #emotionaldivorce #mediation #TheAmicableDivorceExpert #TheAmicableDivorceNetwork #conflict #divorcetherapy #attorneyfees #divorcecourt #legaldivorce #outofcourtsettlement #divorcesettlementagreement #mediationagreement
Tracy Ann Moore-Grant Biography
Tracy Ann Moore-Grant, Esq. is the founder of the Amicable Divorce Network, established to address a growing need to assist clients who desire to keep their divorce low conflict and to effectively connect them to professionals who are vetted for having a resolution mindset so parties can avoid unnecessary and expensive litigation. The professionals in the Amicable Divorce Network design both the timeline and team for the divorcing parties based on their needs and finances. Ms. Moore-Grant is passionate about helping families navigate the difficult process of divorce in a respectful and family-focused manner and now represents clients exclusively in amicable and uncontested cases. She is also a mediator, arbitrator, parent coordinator, divorce consultant and guardian ad litem.
Ms. Moore-Grant is a registered mediator with both the Georgia Office of Dispute Resolution and 9th District ADR for both family law and domestic violence cases as a mediator and arbitrator. She is a step-mother, baker, and schnauzer lover. She is also a Board Member for Mentor Me of North Georgia, contributing writer to My Forsyth Magazine, Mock Trial Coach for Alliance Academy, and teaches Constitutional Law at Lanier Tech. She has achieved an AV Preeminent Judicial Rating from Martindale Hubble, was named a Woman of Forsyth by the Forsyth County News, and has been listed as a Top 10 Female Family Law Attorney in Georgia since 2016. Her firm, Patterson Moore Butler received a Best of Forsyth award in 2022. In 2020, Tracy Ann was personally awarded the Georgia Legal Award for Distinguished Leadership for founding the Amicable Divorce Network, recognizing its positive impact on Georgia family law and families. Ms. Moore-Grant has been a guest on many podcasts and has authored many articles on the topic of amicable divorce.
info@amicabledivorcenetwork.com
website: https://www.amicabledivorcenetwork.com/
facebook: https://www.facebook.com/amicabledivorcenetwork
youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCCzk3S9DfTsyCVxeBGyFkXw
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/81285690/admin/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/amicabledivorcenetwork
Wendy Sterling’s mantra is to “Stand in your own identity. In order to do that we must know our core values.” She created The Divorce Rehab™
Here are topics Wendy will speak to in this interview:
Core Values: Honesty is the biggest value to Wendy. Respect is the second biggest value.
Connection is the third biggest value: Family, Friends, Love
“I betrayed myself because I didn’t stick to my core values’” Wendy Sterling. When Wendy started to recognize how she strayed from what she really wanted in life, she started her path to self-identity and recovery from her old less authentic self.
“Don’t live with should’s. Live with your own core values.”
“A lot of who I became in the marriage was a result of not standing in my own core values, and not communicating what I wanted out of life. I wish I had stood up for what I wanted in the beginning. I stopped trying because I felt unseen.”
Stop being a victim and reclaim your identity and your responsibility in your own life. I played the victim for many years until I lost people in my life and lost my way in my own life choices.
Victim vomiting is a process that keeps you sick and in the place of a victim. Stop sending out invitations to the pity party.
What is the truth about you, your choices, your marriage, and your future? People look at the negative way too much. To heal you must see the good reflection of yourself.
It’s so easy to lose your authentic self by letting the other roles take over: Wife, Mother, Daughter, Sister, Friend. In order to live in connection with other people we still have to define our own authenticity first, and then work in tandem with those in our lives. People will understand if you choose to do something for yourself other than what they want you to do. You don’t have to be mean or harsh when you communicate your needs to those in our lives; you just need to be nice, clear, and honest.
Have people in your life who want to listen, understand, and support you in how you want to move forward.
Taking responsibility for your part in the marriage will change the dynamic of the dissolution and make it be the transformative experience that it can be. Communicate to be heard, not to drown out your spouse’s voice. Take responsibility for the mistakes that you made. Acceptance will follow.
Self-compassion and grace will meet you on the other side of taking responsibility for your actions and your words.
There is acceptance of yourself and acceptance of your spouse. Both levels of acceptance are important to move forward, especially if you will be doing co-parenting once the divorce is final.
Owning your truth, how you define yourself, the choices you make for your best life, can only be done if you stop being a victim, stop blaming anyone for your life situation, communicate honestly and congenially, and take responsibility for all of your life choices.
Wendy Sterling Biography
Wendy Sterling is a certified divorce specialist and grief consultant who has helped thousands of women design a life they choose instead of feeling stuck in the one their ex left them with. After ending her own sixteen-year marriage, Wendy saw first-hand the lack of support divorced women experience in moving through pain, fear and anger to experience joy, self-worth and freedom again. She channeled her energy into building a six-figure business in just two years that helps women heal their wounds, end their victim mindset and reclaim their identity.
Wendy’s expertise has been featured in more than 100 media outlets including NBC, Hello Divorce, Romper, Moms Moving On, The Smart Women Show and more. She is also the host of her own podcast, The Divorced Woman’s Guide, which has had over 70,000 downloads in less than two years. Wendy has also hosted summits, appeared on stages (virtual and in person), and facilitated workshops for companies across the country.
When she’s not showing her clients how to turn the most painful moment of their lives into the most empowered moment in their lives, you can find her spending quality time with her two teen boys in Los Angeles, California. Her forthcoming book, I Do, I Did, I’m Done, is due out June 22nd, 2022.
Website: www.wendysterling.net
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/divorcerehabwithwendy
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/divorcerehabwithwendy/
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/wendy-sterling-cpcc-acs-cds-and-advanced-thetahealer-34b1b95/
Tik Tok: @divorcerehabwithwendy
Women feel financially trapped in their marriage. Stacy’s mission is to provide women with an option to leave their marriage and be financially secure. Specifically, to provide to women financial wisdom and financial security through education.
Stacy tells a story of her grandmother actually dying of financial abuse. Her grandmother died of physical abuse by her husband because she stayed in the marriage feeling financially trapped with no way out because of a lack of understanding of money, without a financial plan, and living in fear about the future, especially their financial future.
How can women without income file for divorce, hire an attorney, and know the financial picture of the marriage?
-
An attorney can be paid in different ways that the woman having the money to file for divorce.
-
Filing Joint tax returns will allow you to access those joint returns from the IRS. This will give you the knowledge necessary to know where you’re going financially in the divorce. And you can see if there is IRS debt.
- There is an unusual situation in that people can hide money within their IRS account by purposely overpaying their taxes so that the IRS is holding money for your spouse without you knowing that there is a surplus of money.
-
Get a copy of their credit report. It can be emailed to you directly. Go to www.AnnualCreditReport.com and request your credit report. If your spouse has signed your name to loans that you didn’t know about, but you can get a better picture of what you have nd what you owe.
Income versus spending is a whole education unto itself. A good financial analyst and consultant will help you create a budget, a spending plan, and see what the woman has to do to be solvent.
Marital Debt is a huge problem if there is more debt that is known to both spouses. And, the spouse who didn’t incur the debt may be the one paying the debt if the debt was created during the marriage!!!! The creditor doesn’t care who pays it; they just want to be paid. One suggestion Stacy gave us is to get your name off of joint credit cards that may help a little is minimizing the community debt. Getting a credit report as soon as possible will give you a heads up on the financial health and welfare of the family. Jump in and get involved.
Financial date night, or a financial advisor will help you, as a woman, understand your financial health and welfare. Being strapped for time cannot be an excuse for not knowing about the family finances.
If you’re experiencing pushback from your spouse when asking to know the financial picture of your financial relationship. “A marriage is an economic union,” Stacy said. 100% transparency has to be available or you may be experiencing financial infidelity.
You could be left holding the bag, and it could be an empty bag if there is more debt than can be managed properly. If, for instance, you have taken your name off of the Visa card and your husband takes responsibility for that debt in the marital settlement agreement, Visa won’t care if your husband defaults on the Visa card. Visa will come after you to pay the debt if the debt was incurred during the marriage.
Financial Infidelity happens more than people think. Financial Infidelity is spending on things and hiding it. Not bringing home your full income is financial infidelity. Financial Infidelity means that you or your spouse are hiding spending from the partner.
In a survey of 150 divorced women, 64% felt that their husbands weren’t being truthful about their finances. That’s a big number, too big a number, for financial openness.
Three Parts to a Divorce as far as finances are concerned:
Preparing Financials
Negotiating the Settlement
Living with the Settlement
Each part of this divorce package is important to understand and to have a financial specialist to review with you. For instance, you may be house rich and cash poor by taking the house instead of cash investments, and then you’re left taking daily living expenses out of investments and savings.
Having the right divorce team is important, but having a great divorce financial analyst is the best decision you can make because divorce is all about money when dealing with the settlement and life beyond the settlement.
financialplanning #financialinsecurity #financialinfidelity #divorcesettlement #certifieddivorcefinancialanalyst #financialabuse #FrancisFinancial #financialfreedom #money #creditreports #IRSdebt #innocentspouserelief #cashpoor
Stacy Francis Biography
Driven by her mission to give financial wisdom and freedom to women, Stacy is the founder of the non-profit Savvy Ladies™, host of the Financially Ever After podcast, and author of resource guides for women in transitional stages of life. Her practice, Francis Financial, is a fee-only boutique wealth management, financial planning, and divorce financial planning firm. Her dedication to providing ongoing comprehensive advice for successful individuals, couples, and women in transition such as divorce or widowhood. Stacy has over 20 years of experience in the financial industry and is a nationally recognized financial expert having appeared in hundreds of media outlets, industry awards, and is also an expert contributor for The Wall Street Journal.
www.FrancisFinancial.com
Facebook: /Francisfinancialinc
Facebook: /StacyFrancisFinancial/
Twitter: /FrancisFinance
LinkedIn: /in/stacyfrancis
LinkedIn: /company/francisfinancialinc
Stacy@FrancisFinancial.com
In divorce we have Fear, we need Courage, we go through Adaptation to changing circumstances, and we need techniques for Communication to deal with the settlement.
All three of our guests, Brian Bushway, Jaimee Kadish, and Brandon Shin were born sighted and now blind. The messages they have to share are inspirational, practical, and myth-shattering.
They still have relationships, too. Access to the visual world is one thing, but relating to the emotional world is another. Visual impairment brings a different perspective to life. We see in another way, through hearing, primarily, and through touch.
Find reasons to be hopeful. Hope brings us the future.
How we face challenges is common to everyone.
Eco-location means image with sound. Blindness causes people to see their environment differently, as do people going through divorce. Neuroscientists say that we can adapt to challenges.
See with sound.
Grief and drama go along with being blind. Cry. The transition to blindness is an Emotional Roller Coaster, as is divorce. Brandon lost friends while losing his eyesight. Felt sorry for himself, grieved more, and then met Brian as a mentor for eco-location and went through a transition to living life differently.
Light and sound work from the same principles. There are characteristics of sound; sound is different depending on the shape and size of the object. There is an Acoustic vocabulary that takes over. Neuroplasticity is engaged. People’s brains can change according to what we have to work with.
Preparing for mountain biking, Brian started by walking, then running, then using his body to address and react to the sound of his environment as he moved through it.
Shattered all preconceptions about what he could do in life once he mastered biking.
All three of our guests started doing things they never thought were possible.
Physical versus emotional blindness.
Jaimee Kadish, “You can’t experience courage if you don’t deal with fear.” Grief for Jamie is a constant, so she uses it to overcome fear. Jamie works with fear and used it as an opportunity to grow.
Brandon deals with fear by quoting Mike Tyson’s coach, “Fear can cut you or it can move you forward in life.” Fear is necessary to grow.
If Jamie is resistant to things that feel uncomfortable, it creates a space between Jamie and all other emotions. If you push away the things that don’t feel good, you can’t really appreciate the things that do feel good, or the things that do feel good don’t come to you as much.
Jamie goes back and forth with sight; she is not 100% blind 100% of the time. But she chooses to close her eyes and to purposefully do some things, like dancing, unsighted.
Feeling to know as opposed to seeing to know. Know who we are and how we fit in life.
“People use the mirror to confirm insecurities,” Brian. “I broke free from the mirror!”
“Vision is being constructed in the mind,” Brian stated. “The brain can stop constructing visual information. Vision is then the picture we construct in our minds.”
Brian focuses on people’s essences. He can sense people. A visually impaired person judges people by their gate, how they walk, their shoes.
“The breath and voice are the windows to the soul,” Brian continued. The breath and the voice is coming from the inside out.
People don’t have control over their vision. They are distracted by the bright shiney objects. Brian trains sales people with their eyes closed.
How do you decide who you want to be around? Brian invests in people who want to be of service to others. I get to know people to see if those people want to invest in others.
Listen to your gut. I want to hear people talk. I only ask a few questions so that I give people a platform to let them talk without interruption. What do people project, not visually but philosophically; how do they think? How do people see the world and want to function in the world?
Communication in mediation is key. Communication is a personal and spiritual mirror of ourselves. I can see my own reflection coming off of another person. We listen to the physical world for eco-location; we can become a better listener in relationships.
What if we all closed our eyes when speaking to each other, can we have deeper relationships with each other? Having a different physical issue is a tool to determine who is right for us and who isn’t.
Adaptability and imagination are necessary to be resilient.
Creativity is a result of spiritual imagination. The roadmap is yours to determine. Am I willing to stand in uncomfortable places, uncomfortable moments, which leads to character attributes. Can’t compare the future to the past or we can’t be hopeful for the future. This is the process of growth.
We all have insecurities: Find friends, find partners to date, what I have to bring to life is the development of my passions and interests. I went from being the care receiver to the care giver. Finding creative ways to serve the people around him is one of Brian’s missions.
Jamie: Courage and faith, “Are we going to be a victim or a student of this situation? If a student, we can develop a deeper understanding of what we’re capable of.”
Brandon: “The best creative product is found through suffering. Creativity has different forms, one being resourcefulness. Lean into the thing you’re afraid of and deal with it. You’ve blinded yourself by the thing that you’re afraid of: FIND YOUR BLIND SPOTS AND THRIVE!
Find your blind spots.
fear #blindness #courage #eco-location #trust #relationships #perseverance #personalchallenge #imagination #adaptability #communication #acousticathletics #creativity #mountainbiking #neuroplasticity
Acoustic Athletics Team Bios
Brian Bushway:
Acoustic Athletics Co-Founder
As a pioneer of human echolocation, Brian Bushway mastered the ability to “see with sound” in his late teens, was recognized as the World’s Best Totally Blind Mountain Biker in his early twenties, and spent the next fifteen years providing perceptual training for athletes, teams, individuals, and organizations around the globe. Brian is a globally recognized keynote speaker, Diversity, Inclusion, and Accessibility (DIA) leader, Certified Orientation & Mobility (O&M) Instructor, employment accessibility director, TV and film production advisor, musician, technology consultant, and entrepreneur.
Most recently, Brian has launched Acoustic Athletics, a performance and development company that offers cognitive, sensory, and perceptual augmentation programs for elite athletes with his business partner Thomas Izdebski.
In addition to working with professional athletes and blind students from all backgrounds, Brian also serves as a teacher of sighted mobility instructors on the use of FlashSonar™ (a specialized form of Active Echolocation) and Perceptual Navigation strategies. He designs and implements perceptual development plans for each client, and serves families by offering informational counseling and emotional support. But his impact doesn’t end there. He has helped them create blind mobility programs and education courses on FlashSonar™, Perceptual Navigation, and family coaching. Brian’s presentations about FlashSonar™ have also been showcased at the Museums of Science and Industry in Chicago and Oregon.
Brandon Shin
Brandon Shin, born and raised in Los Angeles, California, is a third generation echolocation student under the tutelage of Brian Bushway. Diagnosed with Optic Nerve Atrophy at age ten, Brandon lost most of his vision by the age of twelve. Passionate about martial arts and combat sports, he competed in fencing during high school winning third place against sighted opponents. Brandon studied in various martial art disciplines such as MMA, JKD, FMA, Jujitsu, etc. Today, he is an avid Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu practitioner who regularly innovates and experiments with his echolocation and perceptual skills to be more functional for martial arts. He enjoys being in the mountains, especially during the winter when the air is cool and when snow is regularly in the forecast. On his spare time, Brandon enjoys music and shooting guns with his uncles.
Jaimee Kadish-
Acoustic Athletics Movement Specialist
Born and raised in Los Angeles, Jaimee is a Movement Specialist with a lifelong passion to teach. Starting her career in pursuit of professional dance, Jaimee studied classical forms of ballet and modern dance while attending numerous arts programs and received her Bachelor of Fine Arts in Dance from California State University, Long Beach. After being diagnosed with Retinitis Pigmentosa, Jaimee switched her focus from performance to physical literacy, allowing her to dive deep into the relationship between anatomy, movement and understanding how the body works, how it works in motion, and the role of foundational movement in physical fitness. Jaimee pursued her Associate of Arts in Early Childhood Education then entered the preschool classroom where she continued to develop her practice of using movement to help children learn and grow. In her role as a Certified Pilates Instructor (BASI) and Personal Trainer, she works with private clients in Los Angeles. In her role as Movement Specialist with Acoustic Athletics, Jaimee accurately analyzes clients’ movement patterns, identifies overactive/underactive muscle groups and compensations, and creates tailored training programs to enhance creative and functional movement.
www.acousticathletics.com
My Blind Coach- Relationship/Communication Coaching
Instagram: myblindcoach
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MyBlindCoach
Website: www.myblindcoach.com
Acoustic Athletics
Instagram: AcousticAthletics
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/AcousticAthletics
Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC-h5Y_i65SZx1EWwzHXE-8Q
Website: www.acousticathletics.com
Brian Bushway
Instagram: BrianBushway
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/brian.bushway.3/
Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCnSsNx-Ql3WNNcSULXdTbug
Website: www.brianbushway.com
Just this past week I had several of the topics on our show today come up with my clients. These topics have been mentioned separately in several of the celebrity divorce episodes, so I wanted to group them and provide thinking points for all of you.
I. Attorney Fees
- There are totally cool attorneys who would never charge their clients money just to make more money than the work that is needed. And then there are those that see wealthy clients as on-going cash machines, dollar signs, means to the attorneys’ own wealth. Horrific!
- I was told by an attorney recently that the concept of charging money to increase revenue, not as a result of providing necessary work, starts in college. Forbes.com conducted a survey in 2018 for the most and least trusted professions out of a list of 15 professions. Nurses were #1, doctors #2, lawyers #12, care salesmen #14, and Congress #15.
- The larger the hourly rate does not equal better work. The public may be fooled by the size of the hourly rate. And you know how celebrities spend top dollar. But the paperwork for a divorce is the same regardless of how much money a spouse has or an attorney charges.
-
Beware of attorneys who might say something like, “Don’t speak to your spouse. All communication must go through the attorneys.” I cannot tell you the number of times I’ve heard this. Ridiculous! This is a way of creating more billable hours.
-
Don’t Play the Child and Spousal Support Game
-
Kelly Clarkson doesn’t. The child and spousal support game is diminishing personal income to diminish the amount of child or spousal support obligation. Make money. No Judge will allow you to intentionally decrease your earning capacity to decrease your support obligation, especially for child support.
- You’re only hurting yourself when you try to decrease your income. Thrive. Be successful. It’s best for you and for your children. The money for child support, although it’s put into the other parent’s bank account is for food, shelter and clothing for your child. And there are so many creative ways of dealing with spousal support: Dividing an asset to weigh heavily in favor of the support recipient as opposed to spousal support; a lump sum payment that is less than the accumulation of the years to be paid for, advantaging the recipient in ways that monthly support cannot; or a smaller amount monthly over a longer period of time, or a larger amount monthly over a shorter period of time.
- Mary J. Blige said she had to start touring again to meet her spousal support obligations right after the 2022 Super Bowl Halftime Show.
- Erika Jayne said something weird on the most recent episode of the Housewives of Beverly Hills in the last episode. She said the divorce couldn’t move forward or she would owe her husband spousal support. Some of her castmates found that statement odd. I found it wrong. Spousal support is supposed to start when there are two residences, while the divorce is in process, which hers is
III. Pre-Nups and Post-Nups
- Camille and Kelsey Grammer supposedly didn’t have a pre-nup and Camille said she got 50 million dollars from the divorce settlement. You know Kim & Kanye had one, if you know anything about the business acumen of these two people. Sounds like Kelly Clarkson kind of had one. Most people who have earned and accumulated a significant amount of assets pre-marriage want them protected as separate property going into a new marriage.
- But how then do you intend to create community or shared assets? How is it possible to not create community assets during a marriage? Why would you marry if you don’t want to create something of value together – beyond your love for one another – by getting married?
- And then there’s the post-nuptial agreement, and agreement just like the pre-nup but after the marriage has taken place. These agreements seem to have more impact to me because they aren’t contingent on getting married. They are done after the marriage ceremony, which somehow translate to very serious meaning and intention to love first, and assign stuff to each other later.
IV. Social Media
- Just stop talking. Stop posting. Stop blathering your stuff everywhere. No one needs to know every detail of your life. And divorce is such an emotional roller coaster, don’t buy a ticket to the social media coaster. The ride can end in disaster. What you say on social media could set you up for adverse decisions made by the Judge, or you can expose your hand, your strategy if you’re litigating.
- Both Kim Kardashian and Kanye West have misused social media if they are invested in protecting their children from the drama of their divorce. Kanye is volatile; anything can set him off as we’ve seen if you follow him on social media. And the world doesn’t care or need to know who she’s dating until the divorce is final and the relationship is long term, committed and monogamous. Why hurt Kanye by posting about Pete Davidson? Does this really increase the number of shape wear sold?
Whether a celebrity or not, hire an attorney with a good track record, a heart, and a conscious.
Be the best earner you can be and live your life without fear of child and spousal support/alimony.
Protect separate property assets, while defining how to grow as a community, a couple, a family. Pre-Nups, Post-Nups, I say “Nope” to living completely separate financial lives as a married couple. Damn near impossible.
Social Media can become a very unsocial environment if you expose yourself and your dirty laundry of the marriage and divorce to the world.
KellyClarkson #Adele #MaryJBlige #KimKardashian #PeteDavidson #KanyeWest #attorneyfees #divorcelawyers #LauraWasser #unethicalattorneys #PostnuptialAgreement #PrenuptialAgreements #childsupport #spousalsupport #socialmedia #mediation #divorcelitigation
In this episode we discuss the following issues:
-
What does a good divorce look like with attorneys; what does a bad divorce look like with attorney representation?
-
Why do people want to hurt each other in divorce? Why do some lawyers support hurting the other spouse?
-
What is the primary function of a family law attorney?
-
What is representation supposed to look like?
-
The pejorative terms associated with family law attorneys that really don’t serve the clients: Bulldog Attorneys; Lawyer Up; Pitbull Attorneys; Sharks. Is there a value to these words and the type of attorney associated with these words?
-
Can lawyers help change public opinion of them? If so, how?
-
Do lawyers want to change public opinion of their pejorative image?
-
Myth vs Reality
- The Judge will totally find favor with me and with what I want.
- The meaner the better in court.
- How do you get the Judge to like you and want to listen to what you have to say and request?
- Family Law is a credibility issue.
- Divorce doesn’t have to tear your family apart, so why does it?
familylaw #Judges #Attorneys #LawyerUp #PitbullAttorneys #BulldogAttorneys #Ruthless Attorneys #FamilyLawAttorneys #Litigation #Divorce #Court Trial #LawyerLimor #Court #Child Custody #ChildSupport #SpousalSupport #Mediation #CourtTV
Biography of Limor Mojdehiazad, Esq.
Limor was born in Israel and grew up in Los Angeles. She has a natural ability to put her clients at ease and lend support when its needed. Her tenacious personality, relentless negotiation skills, and understanding of the law help her achieve excellent results for her clients. Prior to opening her own law office in 2018, Limor practiced family law at two other private firms in Los Angeles County, Bet Tzedek Legal Services and, Legal Aid Foundation of Los Angeles, and the Harriet Buhai Center for Family Law. She continues to volunteer at the Harriet Buhai Center on a monthly basis to serve the indigent in need of family law services.
Limor has trained with family law judges at the Straus Institute for Dispute Resolution at Pepperdine University. She received her Juris Doctor from Southwestern Law School and her Bachelor of Arts degree from California State university, Northridge.
Limor is a member of the Beverly Hills Bar Association, San Fernando Bar Association, Los Angeles County Bar Association, Southwestern Family Law American Inns of Court, Provisors, and Divorce Transition Professionals. Limor is also a commentator for Court TV.
Limor is also fluent in Farsi.
Law Office of Limor Mojdehiazad, APC
Beverly Hills, CA
310.256.2872
limor@limor.com
@lawyerlimor on IG and Tik Tok (over 11 million followers)
Undercover operations, Background checks and due diligence investigations and litigation support are primarily the work of Barry’s company, Talon Executive Services.
Romance, Financial, and Relationship Exploitation exists and is more prevalent than you think.
People who are being exploited avoid facts, and let their emotions engage their heart in a relationship and don’t want to believe that they’re being taken advantage of. It’s hard to accept that we’re being taken advantage of.
You have to be honest with yourself to be able to identify when there are problems of exploitation. Self-denial is high especially if the exploited individual is a successful person. People aren’t able to accept that they’re being taken advantage of because of the business or financial success. They believe they’re too smart to be exploited emotionally and financially.
Immigration marriages are a big part of the exploited relationships. There are requests being made of the exploited individual that aren’t normal. Asking for money for themselves, asking for money for their families, asking for continued financial support and an independent way of living are commons asks.
When you are face-to-face in an exploited relationship you are in a bubble. You can’t see and correctly interpret the signs that you are being exploited. Reach out to trusted personal and professional advisors to help you deal with your blind spots in the relationship. The heart wants what the heart wants.
“We curate solutions that work within the law to get the client the information they need to be able to clearly decide if they want to continue the relationship,” Dozian explained.
The right signals to be in a wrong relationship exist, but the exploited can’t see them. A personal sense of self-esteem has been destroyed in a highly successful person when engaged in an exploited relationship.
The exploiter uses human intelligence to exploit people in online dating, which is a target-rich environment. We are giving predators a reason to exploit us as we are asking for love and emotional support in this environment. Self-awareness is key when doing online dating.
What is exploitation, the signs, the red flags in relationship exploitation?
1) Red flag: Everything is moving faster than normal. Ask yourself, “Why?”
2) What do I truly know about this individual? If asked and answered honestly should act as a speed break for a relationship that is going down the path of exploitation.
3) When things become chaotic: My family needs help, and even though we don’t know each other that well, can I have money for my family? Exploiters are good at emotional entanglements. Exploiters are called predators. The depth and size of the ask means something. It is a result of a good predator assessing the victim for a time to give the ask, and for the size of the ask. No one in a normal relationship would jeopardize the relationship by asking for things that aren’t appropriate for the point they are at in the relations
Maybe the exploited thinks they’re too cynical. Pay attention to your instincts, because your instincts are your guide. Ask, “Why did you think it was okay to ask me for money this early in the relationship?”
Predator: Human beings are instinctual creatures. We follow society’s rules. We lose site of the fact that our natural default position is to think we’re wrong and are making an incorrect assessment of the relationship.
Question yourself why you’re in this relationship. There is a physiological dilemma when the sex is good.
Engaging with someone emotionally requires self-confidence.
“Online dating is the Serengeti of predatory relationships,” Dozian emphasizes. “Be mindful of everyone who approaches you.”
How to get out of a predatory relationship? Dozian suggests sitting down by yourself, in a quiet space, and put pen to paper. Write down a time line of when you met the individual; write down significant aspects of the relationships, and odd things that struck you about the relationship. Write significant benchmarks, until you come to a point that made you question the relationship. Identify the red flags. This is when the epiphany takes place. Then share the time line with someone you trust, to get their reaction to the events. The potentially exploited then starts doubting themselves, thinking there is something wrong with them, while it’s so easy to ignore the signs and let the relationship take its natural course.
Depending on the results of writing the time line, be prepared to close off access to your financial wealth. Prevent the syphoning of your money.
Divorce is an issue of compromise. If you need to end the marriage, go according to the law of the state and get out of the marriage. Decide if Annulment or straight law is better to end the marriage.
relationshipexploitation #immigrationdivorce #onlinedatingsites #financialexploitation #romancefraud #annulment #privatedetective #backgroundcheck #trustyourgut #realitysucks #predatoryrelationship #immigrationmarriage #relationshipredflags #divorcingapredator #divorcinganarcissist
Biography of Barry Mozian, Licensed Private Investigator; President – Talon Companies
Mr. Mozian’s corporate investigations/security experience spans more than fifteen years and covers a diverse range of disciplines to include fraud investigations, undercover drug/theft investigations and targeted violence prevention. Mr. Mozian is an expert at conducting corporate internal investigations that detect, assess and resolve issues of malfeasance in the workplace.
As a result of extensive field experience, Mr. Mozian has developed a specific emphasis on mitigating the civil liability to the client that can arise as a result of an internal investigation while simultaneously yielding a better than 94% confession rate during investigative interviews. These result are achieved through the use of a proprietary investigation/interview technique that has been developed to meet the specific needs of businesses and labor attorneys alike.
Mr. Mozian’s background experience and training in the disciplines of security and investigations began during his years in the U.S. Army as a field intelligence specialist and has continued through his career postings with several corporate internal investigation teams.
And he’s really good at relationship and romance fraud as you will hear on this exciting episode!
Barry Mozian
President, Talon Companies
714.434.7476
bmozian@talonexec.net
On Episode 180 of THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast we interviewed Mona Elhalwagy, JD, NMLS: 663069 is a mortgage broker with Forbix. Mona lays out the formulas to use to provide a mortgage for Moms especially, if Mom is the lower wage earner and wants to keep the house.
What does a mortgage broker do? Brokers go to mortgage companies to find funding. These mortgage companies do not promote themselves to the public, just to mortgage brokers.
We discuss a number of different situations to help Mom get a mortgage, or refinance the mortgage in her name solely.
- Mom reenters the workforce to qualify.
- Mom takes in renters.
- Mom gets significant financial assets in the divorce settlement enough to get a mortgage.
- Mom receives child and spousal support.
Here is the guideline:
- In order for alimony or child support to be considered as acceptable stable, income, it must continue for at least three years after the date of the mortgage application. To be considered stable income, full, regular, and timely payments must have been received for six months or longer.
- Income received for less than six months is considered unstable and may not be used to qualify the borrower for the mortgage.
How much to qualify for a $300k loan? Assuming the following:
- $600k value
- Good credit score
- A car payment of $250, $100 for property insurance, $400 in property taxes and a 3.875% rate
- Need to make about $4400 a month
- Lenders want to make sure that the mortgage and minimum monthly debt is less than 50% of the gross income
Niche products
Asset depletion
- Asset Depletion is a method of calculating a monthly income stream based on a borrower’s assets
- In general, Checking accounts, savings accounts, mutual funds, bonds, trusts, public stocks, CDs, cash value of life insurance and retirement assets are eligible.
- Different lenders use different formulas to convert the assets into monthly income. Some will take the assets and divide the by 84 months. Others use an amortization schedule based on the client’s age.
- For example, if a client has $1 million of assets/ 84 months, that equals about $11,900 of monthly income and the assets can stay in the account.
Alternatives for self-employed clients
12 months Bank statements – flexibility in using personal or business statements
Pure stated income for owner occupied homes
- Only use the equity in the property. Rate is generally higher, but interest only is available.
- Very few lenders have this product because most lenders need to show an “ability to repay” when it’s an owner occupied home. This is a good alternative to private money loans.
Stated income loans for investment properties
- If the community has investment property, it is generally easier to qualify for investment property because lenders can look to the rents received to qualify the client for the loan
- Have a product where the rents just need to cover the mortgage, taxes and insurance payments. Interest only payments are also available.
How lenders look at income
Alimony or child support
In order for alimony or child support to be considered as acceptable stable, income, it must continue for at least three years after the date of the mortgage application. We will accept as verification that alimony or child support will continue to be paid with a copy of the divorce decree, or separation agreement if the divorce is not final
Document no less than six months of the borrower’s most recent regular receipt of the full payment.
This is good to know in terms of structuring support. For example, if support will continue for 5 years at a higher amount, perhaps structure the settlement so that it continues at a higher amount for 3 years, if possible.
Reentering workforce
A minimum history of two years of employment income is recommended. However, income that has been received for a shorter period of time may be considered as acceptable income, as long as the borrower’s employment profile demonstrates that there are positive factors to reasonably offset the shorter income history.
Part time income
Part Time Income can be considered for use in qualifying as long as the Borrower has a two (2) year history of receipt but no less than twelve (12) months (subject to underwriter discretion). As far as re-entering the workforce, the Underwriter will need to review the Borrower’s prior employment history for the two (2) years prior to leaving the workforce
Staying on title if on mortgage
Some people think that if they remove themselves from title, that they are also off the loan. This is not the case. Being on title is what gives your rights to the property, like being able to sell or refinance the property. Being on the loan just means that you are liable for the mortgage payment. When your spouse refinances the house, it is best to coordinate with escrow to remove yourself from title. This way, you will be removed from title simultaneously when the loan is funded and records
A Stipulation and Order can correct the monthly amounts for child and spousal support if the settlement agreement doesn’t meet the requirements for the length of time that Mom has to receive child or spousal support to get the mortgage. The overall amount of money can remain the same for spousal support while the monthly allotments can be diminished to be over a longer period of time in order to meet the mortgage requirements.
BIOGRAPHY for Mona Elhalwagy, JD, NMLS #663069
Mona Elhalwagy started her career in lending more than 15 years ago as a wholesale lender.
One of her responsibilities was to educate brokers on loan products and how to structure loans. This allowed her to pre-underwrite files before they were submitted to maximize the likelihood of approval.
While working in lending during the day, Mona went to Loyola Law School in the evening and graduated in 2001. After graduation, she stayed in lending because she liked the fast-paced environment and had a passion for how financing works. Mona is a proud member of the California Bar Association.
At Forbix, a loan brokerage firm, she offers all types of loan products for residential and commercial properties. She has a passion for listening to her client’s situation, understanding their goals, and finding the suitable loan product for their needs. It is her vast variety of loan products and industry knowledge which allow her to accomplish this for her clients.
She can be reached at mona@forbix.com or 818-822-5550 (NMLS: 663069 DRE: 01221578). The company website is www.forbix.com.
Social media-
https://www.linkedin.com/in/mona-elhalwagy-21a2a36/
realestate #thehouse #divorce #mortgages #spousalsupport #childsupport #divorcesettlement #creativefinancing #divisionofassets #divorcemediation #creativemortgages #mortgagequalifying #mediation #monaelhalwagy #theamicabledivorceexpert #theamicabledivorceexpertpodcast
title and mortgage #leavingtitle #leavingmortgage
KATIE MALONEY & TOM SCHWARTZ – Vanderpump Rules stars
KELLY CLARKSON & BRANDON BLACKSTOCK
One of the hardest assets to deal with is the house. And when you’re a celebrity, you probably have an expensive home and maybe several of them. Our two celebrity divorces are Kelly Clarkson, winner of American Idol, singer, and talk show host, and her music manger former husband (divorce final in September of last year) Brandon Blackstock; and Katie Maloney & Tom Schwartz of Vanderpump Rules, Sur Restaurant and Tom Tom nightlife spot.
Real estate was part of their divorce and our topic for today.
Real estate is expensive, most times the most valuable asset people have, and the hardest asset to move forward, in many cases, by the time the divorce can be final. It’s emotional and financial. Emotions drive the initial decision. Then logic sets in. Or not. It just gets crazier, more complicated and back to emotional.
Let’s look at Katie Maloney and Tom Schwartz first. They had a very amicable split and mutual decision on selling the house. Katie was quoted in US Weekly saying that the decision was, in fact emotional at first, but then she went through the numbers to see if it was financially feasible for her to keep the house, and that logic became her determining factor to sell the house. It was too much of a financial burden for her to keep it and pay for everything herself, even with her cast member fee with Bravo for the reality show Vanderpump Rules.
Now let’s look at a more complicated situation, Kelly Clarkson and Brandon Blackstock. Many celebrities invest in real estate. It’s safer and more lucrative than stocks, typically. It’s also a tangible asset, which means that failing a flood, hurricane or fire, you always know how the asset is doing, and the volatility in the real estate market is far less than the volatility in stocks. There was a pre-nuptial agreement, and this one piece of property, a ranch in Montana, was solely Kelly’s in the pre-nup. But Brandon, as so many spouses do at the time of divorce, wanted to contest the pre-nup as far as the community property status of the Montana Ranch was concerned. No contest; it went to Kelly.
Here’s what happens with most divorces when the house is the largest asset and some complicated situations arise:
- There are children, Mom wants to stay in the house, but can’t afford it.
- Other spouse can continue to pay for the house until Mom can make more money and refinance the house to buy the other spouse out.
- Child and spousal support may not be enough for the loan-to-value ratio needed for a mortgage.
- Mom will have to earn more money, if possible, to be able to get a loan and refinance the house in her name and give Dad his equity share.
- One spouse doesn’t want to get divorced, is addicted to drugs or alcohol, and won’t sign the paperwork to put the house on the market.
- You’ll need a lawyer to discuss how this works in your state.
- In California, you can request a Hearing and request the court to order the house to be sold and sign the paperwork if the addicted spouse can’t. or won’t
- The community property value isn’t either agreed upon, or even that it is community property.
- It was owned by one spouse prior to the marriage, and the other spouse wasn’t put on the Title. Lega; advice needed to see if it matters that both spouses aren’t on Title. There are other factors that come into play to determine if the house is part community and part separate property.
- It was owned by one spouse prior to the marriage and the other spouse paid part of the mortgage, property taxes, or made some improvements to the property. Legal advice will explain how community property is created in your state. In California, the monies spouses make on their jobs from date of marriage to date of separation are community property dollars, and when spent on things used by both spouses, like paying the mortgage on a house, creates community property.
- The house was owned by one spouse during the marriage and that spouse had a separate source of money that existed prior to the marriage that was used to pay mortgage, property taxes, or improvements. Definitely need legal advice. Perhaps the house remains separate property, but the operative word is “perhaps”.
- There is a pre-nup that clearly states the house isn’t community property but the mortgage was paid for with community property money.
- Ask a lawyer for legal advice.
- What does the pre-nup say about using community funds for the house? This is key in determining whether community property was inadvertently created with the house.
- Sell the house and reinvest the money. Clean, simple, easy. If there is enough money for each spouse to buy something else with their equity share, you’ve hit the jackpot!
- The house is under water, meaning the mortgage is more than the equity in the house.
- A short sale still requires the sellers to make up the difference in what the house sold for and what the current owners owe the bank.
- Keep the house, continue to share the expenses, and sell it when there is no cash outlay from the sellers to move the property forward.
realestate #dividingthehouse #buyout #TitleTransfer #equity #realestateadvice #realestatemediation #loanrefinance #communityproperty #equitabledivisionofassets #divorcesettlement #nesting #mediation #amicabledivorce #appraisingthehouse
On Episode 179 of THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast we have mediator Despina Mavridou, author of Mum, Dad, Can You Hear Me? And a child of divorce, as our guest to discuss the importance of communication between parents, how a lack of communication leads to growing apart and eventually divorce, and how divorce affects children and leads to Parental Alienation.
Highlights from the Interview:
I was trying to be the adult when I was 10. I saw my mother crying and tried to help her. I also tried to be the mediator between my parents, for instance, and ask my father for money, for my mother, because my mother didn’t want to.
There were emotions I tried to suppress until therapy in my adult life. I suppressed sadness, anger, and the alienation I experienced with my father.
My parents were using me as a weapon to hurt each other. They didn’t mean to, but they were because they never dealt with the issues that led to their divorce and therefore couldn’t talk to each other without arguing.
What should parents do to prepare for a divorce if there are minor children? Therapy. Nobody can deal with divorce alone. Everyone going through divorce needs help beyond attorneys. They need therapists, coaches, anyone who can help parents, especially fathers, to deal with the reasons for the divorce. Fathers feel a lot of shame and blame that they don’t express.
My mother cried a lot. I wanted to help her stop crying. I distanced myself from my father because I thought this would protect my mother from her sadness and anger. I thought that by siding with my mother it would make the whole divorce better for me, my sister, and my mother.
My sister and I felt like we were in a battle between our parents, even to explain to mom what we did with our dad was uncomfortable. In order to make my mother happy, we felt we had to badmouth our dad.
If parents don’t know themselves well, lived a life that was fulfilling leading up to marriage and starting a family, they may not grow together as a family.
My parents never learned how to communicate, how to put themselves first, and blamed each other for not being happy.
My dad had an outside relationship because my mom spent more time working and raising my sister and I than she spent with my father, and they didn’t grow as a couple. My mother made more money than my dad. That was a problem for my dad’s pride.
Listening and communicating are essential in developing a good relationship as parents and as a married couple.
Kids don’t want to be part of their parents’ arguments: Different rules in both houses; Don’t want to talk about money; Don’t want to negotiate the co-parenting schedule.
Parental alienation was the only answer in order to stop being the messenger between my parents. When I said to my mother that I would stop seeing my father in order to make her happy, my mother said this wasn’t right. Although my mother spoke badly about my father, she also said that I should still see my father. I was very confused about this.
I needed my mother’s approval, and wanted to be a good girl, so I thought that if I ignored my father I would please my mother.
30 years later, my mother is in a new relationship but still expresses anger towards my father. The issues from the divorce linger because my mother never got help to work on those issues, nor did my father. My parents still don’t talk.
Biography of Despina Mavridou
My name is Despina Mavridou. I am an author, a mediator and a lawyer in Greece. I have experienced the negative effects of divorce due to my parent’s separation when I was 10 years old. I was in the middle of their fights for many years, even after the judgement of divorce was issued by the Court, trying to find a balance. Thus, when I was approximately 17 years old I took the decision that I don’t want to see my dad anymore and this cost me my relationship with him for more than 20 years. We have reunited recently.
As an adult I have worked as a lawyer for many years but in the last four years I have discovered mediation and a passion for writing. For this reason, I have decided to leave my job as a lawyer and concentrate mostly on my passion. My first published book is titled Mum, Dad, Can You Hear Me? This is because I was always feeling inside me that I wanted to share certain things with my parents so as to make them understand how I was feeling about the divorce. Through family mediations I understood how difficult it is for parents to get in their kid’s shoes. For this reason, I wanted to give to the book Mum, Dad Can You Hear Me? a dual purpose. On one hand I want to help children understand that the divorce is not the end of the world and that they can have both parents in their lives. On the other hand, I want to help parents see the divorce through the eyes of a 10-year-old girl so as to better understand the thoughts, needs and feelings of the kids and how important it is for them to have both parents in their lives.
Despoina.mavridou@gmail.com
FB https://www.facebook.com/AuthorDespinaMavridou
IG https://www.instagram.com/author_despina_mavridou/
parentalalienation #divorce #childofdivorce #coparenting #mediation #bestinterestsofthechild #communication #takingsides #childrenasmessengers #childrenasweapons #divorcecourt #childsupport #infidelity #divorcegrief #stagesofgrief #anger #forgiveness #apology
Episode 178: How to Amicably Co-Parent with Dr. Lynne Meyer
On the Amicable Divorce Expert podcast Judith interviews Dr. Lynne Meyer, a psychologist who works with children and families. The questions addressed in this interview with Dr. Meyer are the following:
- Can an amicable divorce and co-parenting relationship change from contentious to amicable, and how?
- How can co-parents become child-centered if the parents are still fighting each other?
- What are some co-parenting techniques that will get the parents unstuck from a volatile relationship in order to co-parent in a child-centered way?
- How do you get parents to understand that the child needs to be with both parents as much as possible?
- How do you get parents to understand the size of the loss created with a divorce, both on the parents’ end and the loss that the children are experiencing?
- Are there therapeutic steps to take before filing for divorce?
- How should parents tell their children that there will be a divorce?
- How can parents support their children in expressing and dealing with their fear as a result of the divorce?
- What are the dangers in using two different co-parenting styles?
- What are the dangers in not allowing children to share accomplishments with the non-custodial parent if the custodial parent won’t allow communication between the children and the other parent when it’s not the other parent’s time with the child?
- What is the benefit in co-parenting therapy?
- What is the benefit in child therapy?
- Why does a child present themselves differently to each parent?
- Can child therapy help help the co-parents come together with a united parenting style?
Biography of Dr. Lynne Meyer
Dr. Lynne Meyer has been in private practice for 27 years. She is originally from Cape Town, South Africa where she trained as a teacher psychologist at University of Cape Town. After leaving South Africa, she lived in Israel for 5 years before coming to the United States to train as a clinical psychologist at CSPP now Alliant University where she obtained a doctorate in psychology.
Dr. Meyer has also trained at NCP in Child Psychology. She is presently training in Mindfulness Trauma Work.
Specialties
Dr. Meyer specializes in trauma and abuse. Her specialty is working with children who are in high conflict custody divorce situations and are sometimes estranged from one parent. Dr. Meyer works frequently for the court in family therapy, reunification therapy and co-parent therapy. Dr. Meyer is focused on the child’s best interest and their development. She is focused on helping children make the transition and adjustment in a divorced family. She works with children as early as 3 upwards.
Dr. Meyer has an empathic compassionate approach. She works with children in conjunction with parents to help families to heal from divorce. She works with a hybrid of psychoanalytic, trauma based and mindfulness therapy.
www.DrLynneMeyer.com
co-parenting #parallelparenting #mediation #familycourt #childtherapy #tellingthechildren #divorce #childtherapist #divorcelawyer #bestinterestofthechild #amicabledivorce #divorcepodcast #amicabledivorcepodcast #drlynnemeyer #amicabledivorcenetwork #amicabledivorcenetwork #coparentingtherapy
Today on THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast, we speak with Attorney David K. Yamamoto about creating the best attorney-client relationship, and what that means. David is highly respected among California Judges and attorneys, as well as his hundreds of happy clients. David’s approach to representation is ethical, calm, insightful, and thoughtful. Just speaking with David and listening to his tone of voice creates an environment of peace in a somewhat chaotic time.
The client is in charge whether they know it or not. The attorney needs the approval of their clients to move through the filing process. Knowledge of the law is to every spouse’s advantage so that they can be a knowing participant in the divorce filing.
Only attorneys can give legal advice. Legal advice is based on extensive knowledge of the law and years of work in a courtroom. People can call an attorney just for legal advice. Most attorneys will give about 10 minutes of time pro bono, and then charge an hourly rate for a more extensive conversation, especially if the case is complicated. There is a difference between interviewing an attorney to see if that person feels right to you for full representation, and scheduling a talk simply for legal advice. Full representation will require an initial deposit of anywhere from $5,000 - $15,000, and that’s just to start a case. Expect to provide more money in continuing retainers as the case moves forward. Once the initial retainer is used at the specified hourly rate for the attorney and his/her paralegals, additional retainers will be needed.A short meeting just to get legal rights defined is charged by the hour and typically lasts one to two hours. Some attorneys charge their standard hourly rate and other attorneys charge a little less than their standard hourly rate.
Many attorneys, after an initial consultation, decide if the client is right for them, and also determine if the client actually needs the services of an attorney rather than a paralegal licensed to file in court for what is called an “amicable divorce”. In those conversations the potential client is doing the same, deciding if the attorney’s approach, tone of voice, and demeanor is right for them. The attorney-client relationship is one built on respect and trust. Follow your gut as a potential client to determine how you feel about the conversation, what was said and how it was said.
If people don’t need an attorney, there are other options in filing for divorce. In many states, like California where Attorney Yamamoto practices, there are Legal Document Assistants (LDA), people who have paralegal degrees and an additional license as an LDA to be able to file paperwork for people in a less litigious and contentious divorce. Or, there are now many online services that exist to remotely help with the forms and agreements for simple divorces.
The range in cost for a full divorce differs from state to state. If the divorce doesn’t go to trial and is handled as an out-of-court settlement, it can be around $20,000 - $40,000 per person. Yes, this is a lot of money especially considering that a trial may not be needed. If the case goes to trial, and there are many hearings for specific reasons like spousal and child support, custody, and vocational evaluations, the price could go up to and exceed a million dollars.
If the client needs an attorney but doesn’t have the money to go the distance financially with what they have in accessible cash, this creates a very difficult situation. If there is real estate in the asset portfolio of the client, or other large financial assets like retirement plans, they can be used to pay the attorney. Sometimes, the attorney is obligated to stay with a client, and put them on a payment plan, if there is a pending trial. There is an obligation within the legal framework of the law that requires an attorney to stick with the case if leaving the case would jeopardize the client’s outcome.
The key in keeping costs down is communication. Communication between spouses is essential in getting to the settlement faster, which brings the case to an end. And keeping emotional communication with the attorney to a minimum as the attorney is only there to work on the legal aspects of the divorce, not the emotional side. Therapists are there to help deal with the emotions of the spouses.
Every client needs to have their attorney clearly explain everything that is planned for the filing. Clients needs to do their own research online so that they can ask the right questions to determine if what the attorney is suggesting is necessary. Unfortunately, there are many attorneys in family law that take advantage of the emotional fragility of their clients, and take advantage of their clients not doing their own research to be able to participate in the decisions of their attorneys. These attorneys see dollar signs with emotional, unknowledgeable clients, or see dollar signs in clients who simply want to hurt the other spouse and agree to participate in this somewhat unethical behavior.
A good attorney/client relationship is based on timely and accurate communication, trust, respect, and the mutual intention to be ethical, honest and intelligent. This goes both ways. Clients cannot ask their attorneys to do anything that is unethical, nor can attorneys respond to unethical requests other than to say, “No”. If an attorney agrees to do anything unethical for their client, know that the attorney quite often will pad their bill and perform in an unethical manner financially.
How can a client tell if their attorney is creating unnecessary work just for the attorney’s own financial gain? Clients need to do research online regarding everything the attorney suggest. The client should always ask “Why?” when next steps are suggested by their attorney other than the normal steps that are required in a divorce. There aren’t a lot of required filings in a divorce that doesn’t need witnesses and hearings. But if the case is fraught with complication, intertwined assets and debts, substance abuse, and mental health issues, this is when the case gets expensive and many filings are necessary. The client should ask why the next filing is important. Then the client should take responsibility for stopping their attorney from doing something that doesn’t feel right or doesn’t make sense to the client.
It can’t be said enough that the client is bottom line in charge of the attorney-client relationship. With this responsibility comes the need for education, focus, discipline, and communication. If after the attorney-client relationship has begun, and it’s not working out, the client should end the relationship and seek other counsel. Nip it in the bud before the bill is too high to leave the relationship. Trust your gut and do your homework. Don’t be afraid to speak up. If you are, you have the wrong attorney.
Biography of David K. Yamamoto, Esq.
David K. Yamamoto, Principal Attorney at Yamamoto Family Law, Torrance, CA, has been in practice since 1986 and remains focused on the subtleties of family law. His extensive experience and skills in this area as a counselor, litigator (over 260 divorce trials plus 23 jury trials), mediator and collaborator has allowed his firm to achieve remarkable results for his clients.
In addition to David’s success as a strong litigator, advocate and mediator, he and his associates also practice collaborative divorce and provide mediation services which are non-adversarial interventions providing viable options to traditional divorce processes. David is a member of A Better Divorce – a group comprised of attorneys and other professionals committed to helping resolve family law issues without the need for court proceedings.
David is one of those rare attorneys who is practical, sensitive to his clients’ needs, moderately priced for his years of experience and success. David will do what is necessary to properly represent his clients, but will not take their money for work that is not necessary. A jewel among gems in Los Angeles family law.
divorce #divorceattorney #collaborativeattorney #familylaw #mediation #litigation #litigator #attorneyclientrelationship #divorcetrial #davidyamamoto #legalfees #costofdivorce #legaladvice #legalcounsel #honesty #ethics #legalethics #communication #legalknowledge
THE Amicable Divorce Expert interviews Judy Graybill, Step-Parent Coach, on the best ways to be a step-parent in a second marriage. Second marriages are tough for several reasons:
-
If the biological parents haven’t healed from their divorce, the step-parent inherits the trauma from their marriage. That trauma will play out in the co-parents’ relationship, in the co-parents’ relationship with their children, and will permeate the relationship with the step-parent and the co-parents and the children.
-
If the parenting styles of the co-parents aren’t the same, the step-parent will be caught in the disagreement over parenting styles when following the parenting style of the biological parent with whom they are in relationship.
-
If the step-parent and their biological parent spouse have different parenting styles, this becomes friction in their relationship.
-
Boundaries in parenting need to be established between the biological parent and step-parent, and the step-parent and the other biological parent.
-
Step-parents need to speak well of the other biological parent regardless of how the step-parent feels about that parent.
-
Step-parents might have to reach out to the biological parent to show support and respect for that parent. If the trauma of the divorce hasn’t been healed, this will be a very difficult step to take, but still try.
-
Keep the conversation with the other biological parent specific to co-parenting. Don’t talk about the bio parents’ relationship.
-
If there is a personality disorder with the other bio parent, the step-parent should learn about it so that they can factor in ways to communicate effectively with that parent. It’s all about the children and how best to raise them.
-
If the step-parent can remain non-judgmental about the other bio parent, that will help the step-parent work in a more conciliatory way with the other bio parent.
-
For holidays, the step-parent should learn the family traditions of the other bio parent and create other traditions that are unique to the step-parent and their step-children.
The best situation for the step-parent and co-parents is to focus on best interests of the child. This is what “best interest of the child” looks like. If there is an issue between the step-parent and co-parents over ideologies or logistics in decisions for the children, ask, “What would give the children the healthiest and happiest life? What would keep the peace and provide harmony in both households?”
The issues that ended the marriage can easily play out in co-parenting and influence the step-parent. Therapy for all three adults together can help work on the current blended parenting relationship if all parents want the relationship to work, and want to be the best parents they can be, minus the titles of biological and step. Children would like nothing more than for everyone to get along.
divorce #step-parent #co-parent #parentingstyles #blendedfamily #mediation #step-parentcoach #co-parentingwithanarcissist #co-parenting #step-mom #step-dad #highconflictparenting #boundaires #holidays #holidayfamilytraditions #secondmarriages #marriagetrauma #bestinterestofthechild #discipline #co-parentingtips
I. This month’s celebrity divorce focuses on Kim Kardashian and Kanye West and their significant others. They both did everything wrong if the model is “Best Interests of the Child” and making sure that the co-parents have worked out this new co-parenting relationship first before bringing new people into the picture.
- Kim and Kanye have 4 children, and have been married 7 years.
- Kim filed for divorce in February 2021.
- In October 2021 Kim was on Saturday Night Live and met Pete Davidson. She started dating him immediately and posted pictures of him on her social media. Kanye had a revolving door of women immediately, starting with Irina Shayk, Vinetria the model, Julia Fox, and Chaney Jones. These women may not have all met his children, but if they were anywhere near a phone or a computer, they saw their dad in dating action. And, Kanye was unkind to Kim and Pete in his social media posts, resulting in an Instagram ban for a day. But, didn’t Kim know how Kanye would react to her going public with anyone she would be dating? This is my biggest concern that she had to have known how Kanye would react to anyone she might initiate a relationship with, but did it have to go public as soon as dating started? Couldn’t Pete Davidson have been the exception to the rule of publishing her life on social media? Did she have to go to the Met Gala with him? There are times when personal life has to come first, and business second.
- I think the most important part of this divorce is how both Kim and Kanye exposed their children to their other relationships while the children were processing the divorce.
- Should they be using Our Family Wizard? More than likely, “Yes”. Since both Kim and Kanye live their lives on social media, by osmosis, so do their children. In order to avoid bringing their fight to the public and potentially embarrassing their children, they need to keep their communication to the public as positive as possible and without divulging the most personal aspects of their lives. That’s hard for people who have to remain in the public eye to make a living, but does the public need to know every detail of a celebrity’s life in order for the celebrity to work? How about Susan Sarandon, Julia Roberts, Meryl Streep, or Martha Stewart? Does the public know who their children are? Nope. And they still work.
II. When and how to introduce new partners to the children and the other parent is always tricky. Sometimes the marriage ends because one of the spouses already has another partner. But the attention and care to detail on how to fold this new relationship into an existing family is still the same: The kids come first.
Questions to ask yourself when new relationships exist:
(1) Is this a relationship that looks like it might last?
(2) How long has the relationship existed? Has it lasted long enough to justify an introduction to the children? Remember Renee Zelwegger in the film Jerry Maguire? She wouldn’t introduce Tom Cruise to her son until the relationship was solid and long enough to move forward.
(3) If this relationship was the catalyst for ending the marriage, how will introducing the new partner to the children affect them?
(4) Has the other parent met the new partner yet? Will the other parent get to meet the new partner before being introduced to the children?
(5) What if the children are still healing from the divorce, can they adjust to someone else being in their parent’s life? What are you going to do if the children don’t accept the new partner? What are you going to do if the children only want to be with you and not your new partner while adjusting to and reattaching with each parent separately?
(6) How long should you wait before forming new relationships? Have you processed the divorce yet? Or are you forming another relationship before taking a good look at why the marriage didn’t work? Are you choosing the same person as the one you’re divorcing? Can you even recognize that you might be making the same incorrect choice again, especially if you haven’t processed your role and your choice of mate in the marriage that’s ending?
These are all questions that have to be asked because the children need stability and they need to redefine their relationships with each parent individually; they are also going through the divorce. They have emotions about the break-up of their family; they need to develop a new type of attachment to their parents; they might be used as messengers between their parents if their parents haven’t resolved their hurt, which is a horrible thing to do to them; they will need to get used to two different homes with two different co-parenting styles; and when a new partner is brought into their lives there may be other children involved which has to be factored into the blended family equation.
III. Here’s the best process for introducing new partners to the children:
- Make sure the children are emotionally secure with their biological parents in this new co-parenting relationship before introducing a new partner of one of their parents. Children need quiet time, alone time with each parent in their new environment. They need to feel secure with each parent separately. Children need to vent and express their feelings, their fears, their concerns, to each parent about the divorce. Divorce affects the whole family, not just the parents.
- Introduce the new partner to the other parent first, if possible. It shows respect for the biological parent, and it doesn’t create a situation in which the children may feel that they have to protect the parent without a new partner, or defend the parent with the new partner.
- If the new partner existed before the divorce, and was the catalyst for the divorce, it could be extremely difficult to have the biological parent accept the new partner, at least at first, but it’s worth a try. At some point all adults are parenting the children. Complete avoidance of meeting is probably not possible, but with time a cordial relationship may be established. Biological parents should know and be comfortable with another adult participating in raising their children.
- Make sure you’re in a monogamous, committed relationship for at least six months if not a year before introducing a new partner to your children. Please don’t introduce everyone that you’re dating to your children. Your children have to adjust to two household first, and feel secure that they will still have stability in a two-household family. A new partner should add stability, not insecurity to their lives.
- Balance the time you spend with your children alone, and with your children and your new partner. Once your new partner is known to your children, they still need time to adjust to this new dynamic, their biological parent with someone other than the other biological parent. It’s a lot for children to process.
- DO NOT post on Facebook or any other social media site, all the people you are dating while going through the divorce. Keep your personal life private. Your children will eventually see a side of their parents that may not be healthy for them.
Children are concerned and unsure about how to speak with their parents once there are two households. They often don’t know what to share. They often think they need to protect the parent who appears more vulnerable. Please let your children enjoy their youth. Introduce new partners when this will add to your children’s lives, and not send them spiraling into emotional chaos. Respect your children and they will reward you with the respect you deserve for considering them as important, integral parts of the family throughout the divorce.
divorce #childrenofdivorce #bestinterestsofthechild #co-parenting #co-parentingwithanarcissist #narcissist #personalitydisorder #newrelationships #childtherapy #blendedfamilies #stepparents #narcissism #co-parentcommunication #stepparent #respect #consideration #amicabledivorce #amicableco-parenting #amicabledivorce #mediation #kimkardashian #kanyewest #petedavidson #juliafox #chaneyjones #kriskardashian #brucejenner #kaitlynjenner #childrenofdivorce
On THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast this week we have Fauzia Khan as our guest. Fauzia shares her journey as a professionally and financially successful woman prior to meeting her narcissistic husband. He was also successful in business. They both shared the same interests in travel, music, dining. It seemed like a match made in heaven: He “love bombed” her at the onset of their relationship, prioritized her, cooked for her, and proposed to her in 90 days of knowing her. Fauzia was treated like a queen, but by a king with an agenda.
And once he had her in his narcissistic spell, she could do nothing right. Everything thing she did was wrong, in his eyes: She was asked to give up her career in banking to manage his company, where she was continually criticized. She couldn’t visit her family, who lived in the same town, and she couldn’t go out with her friends. Her entire life became devoted to serving her husband’s need personally and professionally, to the point where she hardly slept.
Her family and friends didn’t recognize her; she had changed so much to please her husband. Yet the marriage was less than loving. You see, there is no way to please a narcissist. They are an endless well of need, requiring obedience and adulation, lots of personal accommodation, and an acceptance of their priority in the relationship.
Something had to give, and it did. Fauzia found out he had another relationship, and she filed for divorce. The divorce has lasted four years. Fauzia conceded her community share of the business, investment real estate, and any type of financial support. And her husband still wouldn’t settle. It wasn’t until a trial date was set that he agreed to mediation. You see, a narcissist has to be in control, and having a Judge as the decision-maker would be giving up control. So as many times as mediation was suggested in the past, he only agreed to it when his authoritarian hand was called.
When the love bombing starts, take a step back. Love bombing is the first step in setting the trap, blindsiding you with cinematic. The danger in thinking that love bombing is an expression of healthy love hits at the core of many women’s fantasies of being cherished, adored, and emotionally understood to the point that the narcissist is seen as the knight in shining armor. Beware of false princes before you. As good as this rush of love feels, it will ultimately destroy you.
Love bombing is always followed by “gaslighting”. Gaslighting means the victim can’t do anything right. The victim goes from loved and adored to always wrong. And it happens so fast that you’re not ready for this seismic shift in the relationship that the victim doesn’t have time to think. You see, the victim is now in the role of being a “narcissist pleaser”. And this is the trap that is so difficult to break out of. It takes time to understand the key to getting out. This is what we wil discuss on the episode.
divorce #divorcedwomen #separation #separated #relationship #relationships #women #woman #womenhelpingwomen #coach #grow #growth #change #lifechange #life #happy #motivation #findyourpath #findyourself #reclaimyourlife #womensupportingwomen #sparkjoy #fauziakhan #highestgood #howtheydidit #beyourself #over50_style #youmatter #selflove #upyourgame #personaldevelopment #inspiration #life #coach #womencoach #women #woman #learn #learning #love bomb
Biography of Fauzia Khan
Divorce is one of the hardest challenges women face. Fauzia is a certified coach with over 25 years experience in the finance and software industries. She co-authored two internationally best selling books, “The Book on Joy” and “Emerge: Be the Unmistakable Authority in Your Field. She completed specialized trainings from the International Coaching Federation (ICF), Richard Ivey School of Business Executive Leadership Program, and Jack Canfield’s “The Success Principles”. She helps women transform their lives, redefine themselves, emerge stronger, and reclaim their power.
https://findyoursparkduringdivorce.com
Facebook @Fauzia Khan and @FindingYourSparkDuringDivorce
Instagram @finding_your_spark_now
LinkedIn @Fauzia S. Khan
Victoria McCooey, Narcissist Divorce Coach and Creator of the Reclaim Your Power System™
joins us today to help identify the behavior of a narcissist, how women are influenced by narcissists, the types of women who are attracted to narcissists, and how women can divorce a narcissist. It’s not easy, but the victims of a narcissistic relationship can reclaim their power and control and leave the relationship better than when they entered it.
Spotting a narcissist is easy when you understand the narcissistic personality:
- Love bombing at the beginning of the relationship by putting their victims on a pedestal
- Controlling the relationship
- Verbally abusive
- Exerting superiority
- Demean and devalue their targets
- Require an unrealistic level of trust
- Charismatic, generous, doting
- Persuasive
- Grandiose visions of themselves
- Targets people with low self-esteem who are trusting and alone
- Gaslighting/blaming
Narcissists move the goal post so that plans can never be counted on, keeping their targets off-balance, allowing the narcissist to remain in control of the relationship. Victoria explained, “We’re wired to believe people. When things happen that create feelings of distrust, we’re made to feel wrong and crazy by the narcissist.”
Low self-esteem vs high self-esteem. High self-esteem will be slowly whittled away by the narcissist while someone with low self-esteem can be quickly controlled. “People with low self-esteem, especially women, don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings so they will allow themselves to be abused to keep the peace.” When it comes to our own personal space and image, we will allow people to do things to us that are unspeakable.
The decision to leave. Love bomb, devalue, and discard. These are three steps that almost always take place before the narcissist will “hoover” their partners back in. Vitoria stated that “someone can be sucked in an average of 7 times before they have the courage to leave.
Over-achievers, intelligent, independent women are embarrassed that they’ve become sucked in by a narcissist, thinking they should have been smarter than to let this relationship happen. It doesn’t matter how smart you are or how much money you’ve earned, narcissists attack you in ways that are unexpected and that no defense has been established. It takes a while to identify a narcissist, understand them, and eventually to leave them. Sometimes there has to be a physically violent episode that is the trigger to leave. But watch out for “the hoover”, the mechanism by which the narcissist will try to suck in their victims
With the tools that Victoria will provide as a Narcissist Divorce Coach, the “hoover” in your life can be returned with money back: Your freedom.
narcissist #narcissistdivorcecoach #personalitydisorder #divorcinganarcissst #divorcecoach #theamicabledivorceexpert #mediation #communicationwithanarcissist #divorcepodcast #coparentingwithanarcissist #reclaimyourpower #narcissistsurvivor
Biography of Victoria McCooey, Narcissist Divorce Coach
Victoria McCooey is a Narcissist Divorce Coach, Motivational Speaker, and Creator of The Reclaim Your Power System™. She works with those trapped in a toxic, controlling or otherwise abusive marriage to help them stand up to their abuser and regain control of their lives. Having been in an abusive marriage to a narcissistic spouse herself, Victoria is passionate about helping others make the same remarkable transformation that she did. Her articles have been featured in notable publications and websites, and she’s appeared on numerous shows and podcasts. Through her writing, speaking, private and group coaching programs, social media following, and her YouTube channel, Victoria has helped thousands acquire the skills, mindset shifts and courage necessary to stand up to an abusive partner and to create a joyful new life for themselves and their children. You can learn more about Victoria and her coaching programs at victoriamccooey.com.
Instagram: @victoria_mccooey
You Tube: https://www.youtube.com/c/VictoriaMcCooey
Tik Tok: @victoriamccooey
Website: www.VictoriaMcCooey.com
THE Amicable Divorce Expert, Judith M. Weigle, interviews former narcissist survivor Meghan Remington, now a divorce coach and former wife of a narcissist with three small children when she divorced. Meghan’s story is fascinating: She gave up her career to be a stay-at-home mom which was detrimental to her marriage; suffered infidelity from her former husband; moved to another state, away from her family, to accommodate her former husband’s career; and ultimately realized how important the right communication was if she wanted to get control of her life back and move back to the state where she grew up and where her family still lived.
Meghan’s approach to getting unstuck and able to move forward in a high conflict divorce is to help people get rid of the anger that anchors them to the point of losing control over their decisions, diluting their power, and rebuild their future. If someone is married to a high conflict personality, like a narcissist, setting boundaries, understanding the need for compromise, and understanding how to communicate will empower them to take back control of their lives.
“There is a mental reframing that takes places when a person is open to positive change. I help people with mental reframing of their thoughts. For instance, “I have to’ becomes “I get to…’”
“Remember, divorce is only one chapter of your life. You get to choose how you want the story to end,” Remington explains.
narcissist #narcissism #THEAmicableDivorceExpert #TheAmicableDivorceExpertpodcast #divorcepodcast #communicatingwithanarcissist #divorcecoach #therapy #motivation #childcustody #highconflictpersonalities #compromise #ThrivingAheadDivorceCoaching #positivethinking #BillEddy #BIFF #BriefInformativeFriendlyFirm #coparenting
Biography and Philosophy of Meghan Remington
Meghan Remington, Certified Divorce Coach and founder of Thriving Ahead Divorce Coaching has a background in mental health with a Bachelors Degree in Family Studies and a Master’s Degree in Clinical Counseling. After going through a 1 ½ year divorce Meghan thought, “There has to be a better way,” and created the concept for Thriving Ahead with four basic principles: 1) Give yourself time to heal; 2) Break down your goals for post marriage; 3) Consider hiring a divorce coach; and, 4) Get organized.
Remington believes that in order to restart your life after a divorce, you have to consciously move from “we to me”. Reestablishing direction for your life is important so to create a positive vision for the future, and that can only be done through a single focus lens of what is best for you.
Facebook: @ThrivingAhead
Instagram: @thriving_ahead
Pinterest: @thrivingahead
LinkedIn: Meghan Remington, Certified Divorce Coach
www.ThrivingAhead.com
Meghan@ThrivingAhead.com
On THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast with Judith M. Weigle we speak with @LawyerLimor, Limor Mojdehiazad, Esq. about the current divorces and family law cases in the news: Johnny Depp & Amber Heard, Billy Ray Cyrus, Tom & Katie and Lala & Randall from Vanderpump Rules reality show on Bravo. The topics in these cases span from domestic violence and restraining orders, to prenuptial agreements, intellectual property rights, dismissing divorce cases, the significance of the date of separation, dividing a family business, spousal support in a high net worth marriage, paternity cases, and using social media to your disadvantage in a court filing.
We learn so much from celebrity divorces – sorry, celebs – because at the end of the day, their marriage and divorce issues are the same as ours, but with a few more zeroes in their bank accounts and more social media followers. To have your divorce splashed across the TV screens and your Internet home pages is nothing any of us want, yet it comes with the territory of being a celebrity. I wish them all the best and hope that a ray of amicability can shine on all of them.
Lawyer Limor is the legal voice of celebrity divorces in Hollywood and is a Tik Tok sensation with her observations and daily updates on all celebrity divorces in the news. Limor knows her stuff and has dealt with all aspects of divorce in her 10-year practice. Plus, she has a great sense of humor, mixed with candor, that makes her take on high profile divorce enlightening and fun.
Biography of Attorney Limor Mojdehiazad
Limor is a graduate of Southwestern Law school and started practicing family law in 2013. Limor’s office is in Beverly Hills and is perfectly situated to serve both the high net worth couples in Hollywood and Los Angeles, or those needing high end representation that comes from a personal and professional philosophy of honesty, integrity, kindness, and ethics. Mojdehiazad can work as a solo practitioner, or create a team to meet the needs of her clients.
@lawyerlimor #lawyerlimor #LimorMojdehiazad #celebritydivorces #opinions #judgment #theamicabledivorceexpert #theamicabledivorceexpertpodcast #divorcepodcast #billyraycyrus #johnnydepp #amberheard #katiemaloney #tomschwartz #lalakent #randallemmett #vanderpumprules #falsejudgments #nonjudgmental #spousal support #prenuptialagreements #intellectualproperty #socialmedia #amicabledivorces #domesticviolence #couplescounseling #dateofseparation #dividingabusiness #dividing assets #maritalstandardofliving #paternitycases #childcustody #childsupport #bestinterestsofthechild #secretlife #infidelity #realitytelevision #andy cohen
On THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast we interview Tamir Berkman, Divorce Cowboy. Tamir only works with me because, as a man, because he believes he can address the emotional issues that men go through differently than women when in a relationship break-up. Tamir uses, as one of his approaches, Equine Therapy. Equine Therapy is relatively new as a defined way to sort out feelings and gain perspective on why the relationship didn’t work.
Horses absorb distress and insecurity with people who try to get near them. Their reactions to skittish humans is to mirror that feeling back and react in a skittish manner and resist connecting with that human.
Tamir will take us through the ways in which men process emotion in a relationship break-up, and how understanding and dealing with those emotions can create a better post break-up relationship than existed in the relationship.
divorce #amicabledivorce #mensfeelings #mensdivorcecoach #tamirberkman #childcustody #divorcecoach #therapy #theamicabledivorceexpert #theamicabledivorceexpertpodcast #emotionaldivorce #judithmweigle #judithweigle #judyweigle #mediation #divorcecowboy #motivation #mentalhealth #personaldevelopment #separationsurvivalguide
Tamir@DivorceCowboy.com www.DivorceCowboy.com.au Twitter: TamirBerkman LinkedIn: TamirBerkman Divorce Cowboy podcast
On THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast our guest is Attorney Natalie S. Lowe. We will be discussing Tips for Making a Good Divorce Settlement as well as reasons why settlements are difficult to reach.
One of the biggest reasons why settlement agreements are difficult is due to the emotional nature of divorce. Divorce is both emotional and financial. If there are minor children, that adds a layer of continued involvement between the parents that can only be healthy if both parents have gone through the grief stages of divorce, and are ready to change their identities from married to single – at least for a while.
Attorney Lowe will discuss the following reasons why a settlement agreement is difficult to reach: 1) how to know when you’re receiving good legal advice 2) how to be patient if your spouse is taking longer than you want to take 3) when to involve other professionals in the knowledge needed to make the decisions that are right for you 4) when to compromise and be flexible in the negotiations 5) unrealistic settlement requests 6) fear of the financial future 7) lawyers dragging out time for financial gain 8) one or more spouses not ready to let go of the marriage 9) using the child as a pawn 10) emotionally attached to an asset
The decisions made in a divorce settlement agreement are bible once the agreement is signed by a Judge. That’s why every decision should be made with “informed consent”, meaning that legal advice is ultimately important before mediation or negotiation. People try to avoid lawyers or hide the fact that they’ve been to lawyers. But lawyers are there to help people understand the law so that when spouses are in the negotiation for settlement terms, they negotiate with a clear understanding of the law. Hopefully, a good lawyer is chosen. This will be discussed in the episode.
divorcesettlementagreements #mediation #settlementagreements #attorneyadvice #natalielowe #attorneynatalielowe #informedconsent #divorce #childcustody #childsupport #spousalsupport #divisionofassetsanddebts #litigation #theamicabledivorceexpert #theamicabledivorceexpertpodcast #divorcepodcast #judithweigle #judithmweigle natalieslowe #amicabledivorce
Biography of Natalie S. Lowe, Esq. Attorney Lowe has been in practice since 2006. Her office is in the Beverly Hills, CA area. She has specialized in family law exclusively. Her mentor was Dennis Wasser, one of the foremost attorneys in the Los Angeles area for decades. Natalie learned from the best to be the best.
On THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast we have Liz Merrill, Divorce Coach and Mediator, and a survivor of a narcissistic spouse. Liz had small children who came to her and encouraged her to leave the marriage for their sake. This is the complete opposite of what parents attempt to do for their children: Stay in an unhealthy marriage to benefit their children and continuing to live in a home and in a family that doesn’t function well, isn’t happy, and doesn’t display sound judgment. Liz explained that engaging in all the behavior altering she could possibly do to gain the approval of her narcissistic husband never got her the approval she thought she would receive. Liz contorted herself into a person she wasn’t to please her husband and the father of her children, while completely losing her identity. Her children came to her rescue.
With her children’s blessing and guidance, Liz divorced. Merrill will take you through the steps she thought necessary and appropriate to divorcing her narcissistic husband, along with communication techniques and negotiating skills involved in the divorce process.
Liz went on to become a highly successful Divorce Coach and works with women going through divorces with high conflict personalities.
highconflict #highconflictpeople #narcissism #narcissisticpersonalitydisorder #divorce #childcustody #coparentingwithanarcissist #lizmerrill #judithweigle #theamicabledivorceexpert #divorcinganarcissist #divorcepodcast #emotionalabuse #divorcepodcast #brenebrown #minorchildren #communicatingwithanarcissist #narcissisticbehavior
Biography of Liz Merrill, Open Space Mediation, Divorce Coach and Mediator Liz Merrill is a Mediator and a Divorce Coach with a specialization in High Conflict and Narcissistic relationships. She lectures regularly on high conflict divorce strategies and is a sought-after speaker and podcast guest. She also engages in regular pro bono work for families who are experiencing financial hardship and offers pro bono services through various nonprofits and the Colorado Court system. Her understanding of psychological and physiological reactions to trauma, conflict, and anxiety brings a holistic approach to her work with families caught in the High Conflict cycle. After her own litigious high-conflict divorce, she saw the need for a holistic approach to divorce mediation, which included non-violent communication skills, managing trauma, and an understanding of how personality traits and personality disorders create high conflict in a divorce. When she started working as a mediator for the courts, she discovered how badly equipped most divorce professionals are to manage the specific needs of people in high conflict relationships and how damaging it can be to the individuals and, most importantly, the children and family systems. Now she helps hundreds of people in crisis find workable solutions so they can reduce anxiety, save money, and move on with their lives.
https://www.openspacemediation.com/ https://www.meetup.com/high-conflict-divorce-support-group-for-men/ https://www.meetup.com/meetup-group-HighConflictDivorceGroupforW/ https://instagram.com/openspacemediation/ https://linkedin.com/in/lizkmerrill/ https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCxpg55-OQ9ngXfFbaGsxMw https://www.facebook.com/openspacemediation
The Amicable Divorce Expert Celebrity Divorce episode today is “Who Gets the Divorce Oscar?” It’s totally up for grabs! Featured divorces are Lucille Ball’s divorce from Desi Arnaz and how they deal with the community property film studio known as Desilu Productions; Steven Spielberg’s divorce from Amy Irving and a pre-nup that was challenged in court; Nicole Kidman’s divorce from Tom Cruise; and an example of conflict resolution in how Will Smith chose to handle an uncomfortable moment with his wife by blaming another person.
The 2022 Oscar telecast will go down in history. Don’t know which side of history it will fall on since the event just aired, but I will share with you how I saw the Will Smith slap. This is a conflict resolution moment and a moment of honest self-awareness. Chris Rock, like all comedians, told jokes at the audience’s expense. He told a joke about Jada Pinkett Smith’s hair. Will Smith was heartily laughing at the joke until his wife gave him a dirty look. Then Will proceeded to the stage and slapped Chris Rock for “disrespecting his wife”. Since Will Smith thought Chris Rock was funny until his wife showed her lack of appreciation, not in Chris’ joke, but in her husband’s reaction to the joke, Will could have still gotten up on stage, apologized publicly to his wife for laughing at the joke, and asked Chris to be more sensitive to a physical ailment that his wife was suffering from. Now this would have been a teachable moment in conflict resolution.
Divorce is not something that most people want to make public. In fact, when non-celebrities see references to their divorces online, they typically freak out. But every inch of a celebrity’s divorce is made public. If we use celebrity divorces to learn from, we can have real life guidance on how to work with the details of their divorces.
willsmith #chrisrock #conflictresolution #prenuptialagreements #prenups #blendedfamilies #childcustody #dividingabusiness #nicolekidman #tomcruise #stevenspielberg #westsidestory #beingthericardos #stepparents #childcustody #2020oscars #divorce #divorcepodcast #theamicabledivorceexpert #amicabledivorce #judithmweigle #judyweigle
On THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast host Judith M. Weigle interviews Esther Jacob, MA, Associate Clinical Social Worker and Certified Divorce Coach discusses the Perils of Parenting. “Parenting can suck or it can be really rewarding,” Esther refreshingly admits
Esther works primarily with women going through divorce, and primarily women with children. Esther looks at three areas of need for her clients: 1. Communication, not only with the other parent, but with the children, too 2. Child Counseling 3. Normalizing everything associated with divorce change
“Most people,” Jacobs reflects, “don’t know how to talk with their children when a divorce is occurring.” This is because parents have emotional needs at this time and have a lot of fear financially while looking at a future of being a single parent. Children have their own set of needs in divorce. A trained therapist in family counseling, or in parent/child counseling could help exponentially to create understanding, positive communication, and coping mechanisms for this transition of the family.
Normalizing everything in flux during a divorce is paramount because people cannot function well in turmoil. People need a structure within which to live each day and a balance to their day. This is normal. To normalize a major shift in daily structure with new demands of time and thinking brought on by the divorce, can be accomplished with the help of someone who has lived it and works with it in practice.
Anxiety, depression, daily stress, panic attacks are a result of a divorce for the parents/spouses, but can also be experienced by their children. Parenting during a divorce is a herculean task. Almost impossible to be a present, patient, and productive parent. With the right professionals engaged – ‘it takes a team’ – the best possible results can be achieved.
Esther Jacob, MA, ACSW, Certified Divorce Coach Biography
Experienced Associate Clinical Social Worker and Certified Divorce Coach with a demonstrated history of working in private practice and in the hospital and health care industry. Skilled in Coaching, Psychotherapy with Individual, Couples and Group Work. Strong interpersonal skills and work ethic. Specializes in issues related to feeling overwhelmed, anxiety, depression, OCD, social anxiety, divorce, parenting and co-parenting. Deals with communication issues in all forms of relationships. Strong community and social services professional with a Masters Degree focused in Social Work from Adelphi University. In good standing with BBS.
www.estherjacob.com contact@estherjacob.com 310.651.5066 https://www.linkedin.com/in/esther-jacob-acsw-417032ab/
parenting #estherjacob #theamicabledivorceexpert #theamicabledivorceexpertpodcast #perilsofcoparenting #coparenting #childrenofdivorce #childtherapy #divorce #childcustody #parallelparenting #anxiety #depression #socialanxiety #OCD #visitatonschedule #divorcecoach #perilsofparenting
We have Ann Gold Buscho, PhD. On THE Amicable Divorce Expert today with Judith M. Weigle to discuss one creative option to co-parenting: Birdnesting, or Nesting as it is often called. There are many creative ways to organize the co-parenting plan: 2-2-3, 5 & 5, alternating weekends, and Nesting/Birdnesting. Dr. Buscho explains one option, Nesting, that allows for physical stability for the children, in that the parents move in and out of the family home while the children never move. They remain in their family home while their parents move in and out on their parenting time.
This option is a little more expensive because both parents share the financial cost of maintaining the family residence, along with another residence that the parents also share as their adult headquarters.
Nesting also requires that the parents have good communication skills because they are still occupying the same addresses. Good communications skills are absolutely necessary in order to maintain a calm household for the children, to create a game plan for daily chores, to manage food purchasing for the parents and the children, to keep the home clean and the outside grounds maintained, to attend the children’s school and social events, and to model good behavior in front of the children.
It can seem unrealistic to have parents continue to live together via the Birdnesting approach, but parents who have respect for one another and who can communicate effectively verbally and in writing, find this form of co-parenting beneficial.
Dr. Buscho has many different checklists and questionaires in her book to help parents decide if Bidnesting is right for them. She even has lists of Birdnesting deal breakers, lists of concerns that would make nesting ineffective at the least, and contributing to the imbalance of their children’s emotional health at the forefront: Parenting power struggles, mental health challenges, forgiveness, parallel parenting vs co-parenting, inability to stick to plans, maintenance of the environment, and parenting styles.
Lastly, Ann discusses ways in which to end Birdnesting. There has to be a plan in place so that the transition for the children and the parents can be smooth. Nesting can last months or years; it just depends on what approach services the family best.
Parents can learn to cooperate through the exercise of nesting/birdnesting. This arrangement can, in a good way, force parents to communicate and modify their behavior for the betterment of this new version of their family unit.
nesting #birdnesting #coparenting #stepparenting #collaborativedivorce 3divorcetherapy #coparentingtherapy #theamicabledivorceexpert #theamicabledivorceexpertpodcast #judithmweigle #amicabledivorce #drannbuscho #psychologytodaymagazine #mediation #parentingplans
About Our Guest Dr. Ann Gold Buscho, PhD.
Dr. Buscho is a licensed clinical psychologist who specializes in family issues and issues related to divorce., parenting, parent planning, and co-parenting counseling. She has professional and personal experience in nesting, co-parenting, stepparenting, and single-parenting issues. She has presented widely at state and national conferences for attorneys, mental health professionals, and financial professionals on collaborative divorce, forgiveness practices, nesting during divorce, and consensual dispute resolution.
Dr. Buscho is also a founder of a residential treatment program for traumatized emergency responders and their families at which she volunteers regularly. A graduate of Stanford University and the California Graduate School of Psychology, she lives in San Rafael, California.
Ann writes regularly for Psychology Today (www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/better-divorce?eml) and other online publications, and has been a frequent guest on podcasts and radio programs relating to family issues.
www.drannbuscho.com
Blog: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/better-divorce?eml
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ann-buscho-ph-d-4110437/
Twitter: @abuschophd
Feacebook: www.facebook.com/drannbuscho
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/collaborativedivorce/
On the Amicable Divorce Expert podcast with Judith M. Weigle we have Mediator, Therapist, Educator, and podcast host Colleen O’Neil back sharing her experience getting divorced. It’s so interesting to listen to a divorced person who is a family law professional speak about their divorces and the challenges they faced in the process.
Colleen was married to a law enforcement professional, a sheriff, who was also an angry husband and father. They lived in Massachusetts. Like any of us, when we are upset, we can unfortunately use the tools of our profession to seemingly intimidate in order to make the divorce process harder. That’s because many of us don’t have the emotional language to use in place of intimidation. Why is that? Because we are not taught how to communicate when we are upset, or have mental health challenges that blind us from being able to compromise or see the other spouse’s point of view.
Colleen had a small child at the time of her divorce and this is where the compromise took place. Colleen agreed to drive her daughter to Massachusetts from Connecticut in order for her husband to be able to share co-parenting time. Colleen needed to move to Connecticut to live with her parents for a short time while regrouping to start a profession as a single parent with much-needed support from her family for her daughter while going to school and working.
Compromise is part of every divorce settlement. Sometimes the price of compromise is huge, but so is the reward. For Colleen, her reward was having family support while raising her daughter as a single mother and receiving the education needed to provide an excellent life for her child. Colleen received the gold, the currency she found essential to moving forward and out of the marriage.
What currency is in your compromise wallet?
COLLEEN O’NEIL’S BIOGRAPHY
Colleen O’Neil, MSW, M.Ed. brings remarkable credentials and impeccable skill sets in assisting others with creating exceptional agreements. She is a mediator, educator, therapist and life coach. She has been helping individuals, children, couples and families to create a space where each individual feels heard and safe.
Colleen worked for the Cambridge, MA District Attorney’s office assisting victims of violence, homicide, rape and child abuse. She has trained law enforcement in victims services, empowering them with knowledge and skill sets necessary to help victims.
Colleen is a board member of Shared Parenting Council of Connecticut working to improve state laws and policies governing divorce, parenting and family court processes.
O’Neil’s work is focused extensively as a Relationship expert, Divorce Mediator and Life Coach. Her additional mediation training, and personal experience going through divorce, is what makes Colleen an accomplished, qualified and competent divorce professional to assist in creating balanced and tailored mediation agreements.
Colleen maintains a private mediation practice and divorce coaching practice in Westport, CT.
Colleen@ColleenONeil.com
MediationandBeyond.com
Mediation and Beyon, LLC
@mediation_and_beyond (IG)
Colleen P. O’Neil (FB)
Colleen O’Neil (LinkedIn)
Mediation and Beyond (You Tube)
childabuse #domesticviolence #coparenting #divorcesettlements #divorcemediation #divorcefinancialanalyst #theamicabledivorceexpert #theamicabledivorceexpertpodcast #compromise #familycourt #divorcecoach #lifecoach #mediationandbeyond #mediationandbeyondpodcast #judithweigle #judithmweigle #amicabledivrce #amicabledivorcepodcast
Can Mediation Work for Everyone? with our guest Colleen O’Neil, MSW, M.Ed, Mediation and Beyond, LLC, Mediator, Therapist, Life Coach, Educator and podcast host of Mediation and Beyond. We will discuss:
.Domestic Violence .When mediation isn’t the right choice, at least not now .The court’s inadequacy in decisions regarding child abuse .How to prepare for mediation .How to know when you have the right financial settlement
A core philosophy that Colleen will discuss is about change. “You don’t need to wait on someone else to change so that you can change yourself.” Coming from all of Colleen’s levels of expertise, she shows us that waiting for our spouses to change will not serve our purposes if we feel that change is needed in order for the relationship to move forward. When we see that change is needed, we need to change. Or, when we feel that we need to make changes within our relationship role, waiting is not in our best interest.
There’s no excuse for child abuse. There is no masking the fact that if a parent is abusing their child, a change needs to take place. But is the court the best place to make that change? Are Judges in the position to understand the scope of the abuse, the existence of the abuse, and provide a remady for the abuse?
Biography of Colleen O’Neil, MSW, M.Ed, Divorce Mediator, Life Coach, Relationship Expert
Colleen O’Neil brings remarkable credentials and impeccable skill sets in assisting others with creating exceptional agreements. Colleen worked for the Cambridge, MA district Attorney’s office assisting victims of violence, homicide, rape, and child abuse. She also trained law enforcement and professionals in victim services, empowering them to understand how to help victims.
Colleen is a board member of Shared Parenting Council of Connecticut working hard to improve state laws and policies governing divorce, parenting and family court processes.
O’Neil maintains a private mediation and divorce coaching practice in Westport, CT and will also travel to clients.
Colleen@ColleenONeil.com MediationandBeyond.com Mediation and Beyon, LLC @mediation_and_beyond (IG) Colleen P. O’Neil (FB) Colleen O’Neil (LinkedIn) Mediation and Beyond (You Tube)
childabuse #domesticviolence #coparenting #divorcesettlements #divorcemediation #divorcefinancialanalyst #theamicabledivorceexpert #theamicabledivorceexpertpodcast #compromise #familycourt #divorcecoach #lifecoach #mediationandbeyond #mediationandbeyondpodcast #judithweigle #judithmweigle #amicabledivrce #amicabledivorcepodcast
Super Bowl Show Rappers Celebrity Divorces with Attorney Limore Mojdehiazad on THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast will feature Dr. Dre, Mary J. Blige, Eminem, 50 Cent, and super fan Kanye (also known as "Ye"). The topics Limore and I will be discussing are spousal support in a high net worth settlement, child support, child custody, adoption, set-parent, social media and divorce, dividing a business, pre-nuptial agreements, bifurcations, spousal privilege, parentage cases, best interests of the child, Limore Mojdehiazad is a Beverly Hills attorney with offices in Century City. Limor is a millennial, a social media commentator, and one of the most ethical attorneys in Los Angeles. Limor understands celebrities and high net worth cases. She also understands the impact of social media exposure on a Judge's decision-making. She teaches people how to deal with social media in a divorce, how to clean up your personal brand, and how to proceed in the most honest way for the most amicable outcome to a divorce or parentage case. #rappers #rapmusic #drdre #snoopdogg #eminem #kanyewest #ye #maryjblige #50cent #superbowlhalftimeshow #spousalsupport #childcustody #childsupport #bifurcation #parentalrights #parentage #THEAmicableDivorceExpert #TheAmicableDivorceExpertpodcast #attorneylimormojdehiazad #lawyerlimor @lawyerlimor #divorcepodcast #amicabledivorce #superbowlhalftimeshow #superbowlshow #superbowlhalftimeshowLVI #superbowlLVI
Romance Fraud & Financial Exploitation with Brian Stefan, former intelligence officer with the U.S. Department of Defense and the FBI-LAPD division before he entered the profession of therapy with a specialty in grief and suicide prevention, is our topic today on THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast with Judith M. Weigle. I learned of romance fraud and financial exploitation in my work as a divorce paralegal and mediator when I saw older men who were widowers look for younger women from other countries on dating sites, a place that was foreign to them. They didn't understand that not everyone's intentions were to find true love, but to find someone who was needy enough to provide unlimited financial support for them and their families. Not that romance fraud and financial exploitation don't exist within the American population, too. It does. Brian Stefan will enlighten us about the motivations of those who perpetrate romance fraud, what romance fraud looks like, and how to extricate yourself from a relationship, a marriage that only serves to exploit you rather than add value to your life. It's hard for people who are pure of heart, and would never take advantage of someone for money, to understand that they are victims of romance fraud, yet it happens every day. There are clear signs that are similar in most cases that Brian will explain to help you understand if you are being defrauded. The result of not accepting that the person who you thought loved you really doesn't can actually be suicide if the fraud is that extreme. Are you a victim of romance fraud and financial exploitation? #romancefraud #financialexploitation #brianstefan #theamicabledivorceexpert #theamicabledivorceexpertpodcast #fraudulantmarriage #judithweigle #judithmweigle #divorce #divorcepodcast #amicabledivorce
Brian Stefan, ACSW, MSW, psychotherapist and proud social worker specializing in grief, suicide, anxiety, and crisis response. Brian is our guest on THE Amicable Divorce Expert with Judith M. Weigle, to discuss how to divorce a spouse with depression and suicidal ideation (serious thoughts about taking one's own life). Brian provides individual, couples, and group therapy for those who are experiencing deep suffering due to profound difficulties such as grief and traumatic grief. Since divorce is a trigger for depression, understanding the conditions of grief and suicidal ideation will position the other spouse to proceed with compassion while accruing the knowledge necessary to surround both spouses with the right legal and mental health team to allow the divorce to move forward without severe complications, if possible. The spouse without depression can feel guilty about divorcing a spouse with mental health concerns, which is why both spouses will need counseling in order to properly move through the divorce. Brian's inspiration and professional influences are many, but first and foremost is the well-known television educator Fred Rogers - "Mr. Rogers" - who reminded children of all ages: "If it's mentionable, it's more manageable." Brian@wecantalkaboutsuicide.org info@spotlightonsuicide.com #BrianStefan #THEAmicableDivorceExpertpodcast #JudithWeigle #JudithMWeigle #divorcepodcast #amicabledivorce #depression #suicide #suicideideation #grief #suicidal #compassion #mentalhealth #suicideanddivorce
"My Husband's a Woman Now" author Leslie Hilburn Fabian, LCSW is our guest today on THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast with Judith M. Weigle, sharing her journey through meeting her husband Dr. David Fabian, orthopedic surgeon, marrying David, and then confronting David's need to transition to female Deborah while Leslie considered her ability to remain in the marriage as a heterosexual woman. Leslie wanted to document her experiences as the spouse of a transgender person to give voice to those spouses confronting either the continuation of their marriage or a divorce, as the spouse of a transgender person is often overlooked. The focus is typically on the person transitioning and not on those closest to them. Loved ones of the transgender person have to somehow transition, too, in their thinking and acceptance of this major life change, their own identity if they are the spouse, and the ability for the children and extended family to have continued love beyond the gender transition. This will be controversial for some of you, and life-changing for others as you listen to Leslie's story of her life commitment to her happiness and her spouse's happiness, as well as self-love in the face of the hardest decision she's ever made, to stay or leave the marriage. #transgender #transgendermarriage #love #unconditionallove #selflove #MyHusbandsaWomanNow #marriage #amicabledivorce #LeslieFabian
Exploring the divorce of Kris Kardashian and Caitlyn Jenner gender transformation is only one aspect of the family issues they had to confront. They are also co-parents who will be in each other's lives forever. They had a blended family of eight children and several grandchildren. This marriage was not their first and probably won't be their last. And they are celebrities which means that they are constantly under public scrutiny. How did they, and how can you keep it all together if you are experiencing any or all of these aspects of divorce. #transgender #transgendermarriage #transgenderdivorce #blendedfamily #coparenting #amicabledivorce
Dr. Anne was in her own high conflict relationship and used the same techniques for herself that she uses on her clients who cannot seem to extricate themselves emotionally, physically, and financially from their unhealthy and controlling relationships. The questions to ask yourself in order to know if you're in an unhealthy and controlling relationship: 1) Does the divorce seem never-ending: 2) Are you continually being pulled into court by your ex? 3) Are you terrified watching your court costs spiral out of control? 4) Are you confused as to why your partner will not reach an agreement? Dr. Anne will answer these questions and more.
Leaving a Narcissistic Relationship with Denise Kavalisuskas, Transformational Love Coach will be transformative. Denise speaks from her own 22 year marriage to someone with narcissism, her journey from awareness to action, leaving one of her children with their father and taking one child with her. Denise will discuss how she came to trust herself and choose herself in order to leave her marriage, leave her extended family, move to another state, without a source of income, but with the currency that is most important...her faith and her duty to herself. Denise's choices paid off in spades. She has been happy married for 10 years, and has a flourishing career as a best-selling author and a coaching business that has no boundaries. You can do it, too!
www.trueloveaftertoxiclove.com
https://www.instagram.com/lifeafternarcissism_111/
https://www.facebook.com/groups/lifeafternarcissism
Divorce is a New Beginning, both personally and professionally, especially if we have been stay-at-home parents who now have to work. Even if we have been the income earners for the family, divorce has a way of forcing us to reevaluate ourselves in order to make healthy changes as part of our growth. Divorce is emotionally and financially tough, but the silver lining is that we are positioned to evolve in ways that we wouldn't except for the fact that we had to deal with a divorce. Tracy Enos found this out as she was going through her divorce, and went from flush to fumbling for work. Through her self-determination to thrive and succeed, Tracy found that she had a gift of understanding marketing, and became an expert by accident on LinkedIn, the largest site to network for work with other professionals. Join us in this enlightening episode to reinvent your career with guidance from a professional who did it for herself.
Can High Achieving Women Have It All With One Person? Only if that one person, that husband, is also high achieving. The cultural norm is still around: Men earn more than women. When that equation is flipped, the cultural norm is challenged and in 33% of those marriages, a divorce takes place. It's very difficult for a women to be the higher wage earner and not either look down on their husbands at some point, or grow apart. Ego is involved; personal energy is different; and expectations that women were brought up with - the man is the financial rock in the family - silently gnaw at the marriage. We highlight Bethenny Frankel in our Celebrity Divorce Series because she wanted it all, with one husband, but that didn't happen. In the words of Snoop Dogg, "Game Knows Game." Those who succeed connect with those who succeed on the same level. We'll break down the aspects of Bethenny's divorce that may be part of your divorce.
Elle Barr, attorney and Judicial Educational Coordinator for Our FamilyWizard will discuss what the phrase Best Interests of the Children really means and looks like. Family law professionals use this phrase constantly, but it's the most difficult behavior to enact. Most people are so emotional during the divorce process that they can barely function. Keeping the parents' own lives together is difficult enough with working, domestic duties, children's schooling and activities, and now the co-parenting plan is added, that parents are completely stressed out. Barr will discuss some tips for focusing on the children as well as yourself and the other co-parent. Everybody does the best they can, but sometimes your best needs help. There are ways to mitigate your parental personal stress in order to focus on whatever needs to be done to keep the children balanced and healthy as the entire family goes through the divorce transition.
We are told to forgive those who have perpetrated ills on us, but we are seldom told to forgive ourselves for those same issues. Self-forgiveness carries with it intended change so that we don't remain in the same destructive behavior pattern that caused our concerning behavior in the first place. Self-forgiveness is necessary to self-evaluate, self-reflect, and redefine who we want to be and how we want to function as individuals. The power of forgiving another person is huge - it frees the heart to feel good again - while self-forgiveness is a game-changer that will make us better people in relation to ourselves and ultimately others.
Holidays are stressful enough without the additional effort in organizing co-parenting plans with blended families. These configurations can be anything from everyone gets together in one house, to separating days with the children, to dividing each day between co-parents. Whichever way works best for your family, Judy will support with different approaches to including step-parents, when to include step-parents, how step-parents can create their own dynamic for an amicable extension of the family, and how to eliminate the stress attached to these decisions. Let's end this year with a Ho-Ho-Ho for All!?
Molly takes us through her journey to divorce, in light of her religious background and her role as a home schooler, two very important considerations while making the decision to transition out of the marriage. Molly and her former husband made a conscious decision to give their children the best lives possible post divorce, and to always blend their families. Now that Molly and the children's father are in other relationships, their families have grown to include everyone! They even have a blended family holiday card that they send out to friends and family. Let's listen to this incredible role model of a single mom, divorced mom, and step-parent share her divorce story, her story of conscious commitment to family, and how she has made her blended family a modern miracle to enjoy and from which to learn.
Everyone experiences pain in divorce, from the lead-up to the decision of the divorce, through the process of uncoupling, in order to create a new beginning from this significant life event. We feature Adele because she speaks about her entire process in an interview with Oprah, interfaced with clips from her Hollywood Concert at the Griffith Park Conservatory. The lyrics from her CD “30” confront and explain her pain and how she processed it. Her outlet is music. What’s your divorce song?
Karen McMahon, Certified Divorce Coach is visionary, clear, and eye opening in terms of providing a roadmap for healing. empathy, understanding, and acceptance of this major life event called 'divorce'. There are 7 stages of grief in divorce, while only 5 when grieving a life lost of a loved one through death. Divorce is often described as a death, but it's a death of a relationship while the partner we're losing is still alive. If there are minor children to co-parent, you still have to be in contact with the person you've just grieved. The loss of a marriage can be more devastating than the loss of a human life. That's why this episode with Karen McMahon is so important for everyone going through divorce. and contemplating divorce.
Receiving a divorce settlement is great, especially if there are significant cash assets, real estate, and retirement plans included. It's what we do with the settlement that's key, and having a professional who knows how to invest it is gold! Jonathan will walk you through the mindset needed to manage your settlement properly, and share options you have to consider in order to choose someone who will do the best for you to help your invests grow. Divorce is so emotional that spending the money after divorce will be enticing, but the discipline required to gratify yourself and invest will be your ticket to financial freedom.
For 20 years Catharine Blake worked as a Child & Family Psychotherapist, before becoming a Certified Divorce Coach. Working with children in stressful family dynamics is a rarity in the world of therapy because it is so extremely difficult. On this episode of THE Amicable Divorce Expert podcast Catharine Blake will share her knowledge and provide guidance for parents going through divorce so that they can avoid the pitfalls that will create anxious, stressed, and unhealthy children, from introducing new partners into the family dynamic, supporting their children in their children’s activities, to communicating with each other amicably.
Our Celebrity Divorce series focuses on the current child support modification case of Charlie Sheen and Denise Richards. Attorney Matthew Smurda will take us through the modification process for custody, the co-parenting schedule, and child support, addressing fears and concerns that both parents have with these three aspects of co-parenting.
Mediator & Psychotherapist Dr. Kathy Memel, Victoria Goldfarb, Esq., LMFT, Mediator; Therapist & Mediator Michele Hahn; and Mediator Marvin Whistler discuss their challenges in working with spouses in a divorce and what their clients can do to have a more successful and amicable divorce settlement process.
Attorney Solomon will discuss credit card debt, community debt, IRS debt, and the responsibility for both spouses regarding debt created during the marriage regardless of what the settlement agreement states.
Julie will discuss how to shed yourself of an image that no longer suits you as you go through the Emotional Divorce and reconcile your married life, and create your vision of your future. We are transformed through divorce if we use divorce as a growth experience.
We'll review celebrity divorces with and without spousal support/alimony and those without. We'll also review the factors considered by the court to determine the existence of, value of, and length of time for money to be paid by one spouse to another after the divorce is final. These factors affect all of us.
Men need to look and feel good, too, in order to be their best during the riggers of the divorce filing. There is a psychological shift that takes place in us when we take care of ourselves and look our best.
Men have different fears than women in divorce, specifically the loss of their children and the continuing cost of spousal support or alimony, to the extent that their lives may be ruined. John Nachlinger addresses all of their fears and speaks the language of men so that men confidently proceed with divorce with calm confidence and continued responsibility.
Caroline Pak, Mediator and Certified Divorce Analyst, explains what to consider in everything from taxes on your half of the settlement, longterm growth in what your half allows, and a restructuring of the settlement so that both spouses get the best financial result from the division of assets and debts.
Positive Communication, Respectful Behavior, and Putting Your Child's Interests First are all forms of Leading By Example. Even if you are the only parent modeling good communication and respectful behavior, you have a chance of influencing your spouse to model the same.
When custody decisions become difficult, there are either control issues going on between the parents resulting in custody complications, or there can be behavioral issues with one spouse that are not being dealt with. This episode is a thorough look at custody and co-parenting for the best interests of the child.
Divorce is emotionally difficult, with and without children, but especially tough with children involved. Pamela will share her insights as a marriage and family therapist for the help that a therapist can provide during the divorce process, and share with you a little about her own divorce in which she represented herself in a trial with the largest law firm in California representing her husband.
Frank will share his experience with an amicable divorce, and not only discuss his relationship with mental illness and suicide, but give tips to anyone who may be divorcing a spouse who suffers from mental illness. You'll laugh and learn.
Each culture expresses themselves differently as part of their daily living. In divorce, these unique behaviors can factor into divorce settlement agreements. Listen to this discussion about culture and divorce, and how not understanding cultural can impede and derail a good settlement.
Part II of this Jayne/Girardi divorce will focus on community property division and bankruptcy, division of a partnership business, spousal support, attorney fees, and the use of social media as evidence effecting a divorce settlement.
As a child of an unusual separation with her parents at age 3, Lydia discusses how her relationships with her parents were formed, and how the co-parenting relationship was structured, with an analysis and reflection on Lydia's two divorces, and how her current relationship is a healthy product of what she learned from her two previous marriages.
Bill Eddy, Esq., LCSW, Mediator, who will demonstrate a more successful way of communicating with a high conflict coparent.
I will detail how to negotiate a divorce settlement with power and control over your destiny, your independence, and your self-worth and self-respect.
We will explore the tracing and accounting of money between spouses and their businesses that may be affected before a divorce can continue.
Kevin Barclay looks at the benefits of not responding quickly to emotional communication, and instead take a breath and wait 10 seconds before speaking for a response that diminish fiery communication instead of fueling it.
Cindy Stibbard will discuss how to use divorce for a positive life change both during and after the divorce. Cindy will explain how an adverse life circumstance like divorce can shatter our spirits, and at the same time be an agent for self-awareness and a new approach to life.
Individuation is a process by which we evolve into the next stage of who we are, and gain a clear sense of self different than how we have previously defined and presented ourselves within our family structure and with our friends. Anthony's TedX talk is about how we all can continue to evolve at different stages in our lives to be our most authentic selves.
Judge Michele will discuss why she wrote the book and how she, as a former Family Law Judge, could see how divorce litigants could have a completely different, and more positive, divorce experience if they could follow another path towards divorce, a path rooted in acceptance, understanding, empathy, compassion, and forgiveness, while using divorce to reframe and change their lives for a better outcome than they could have ever imagined.
Matthew Smurda details the divorces of the two richest men in the world, who both live in Washington State yet with two very different stories. Bezos was extremely amicable and over expeditiously, while the Gates divorce continues to tell a very different story of discord between Bill and Melinda. Listen to Attorney Smurda discuss the extra considerations that titans of commerce and industry must consider while going through the same processes of dividing assets and debts just like us.
Mike's divorce was the turning point in his personal life that he used to create the business life that has given him the greatest happiness so far in his career and earning potential. Mike used divorce as the impetus to revise his entire life into that which reflects who he is without compromise. He shares this experience with you today.
Finances are the #1 reason why people divorce, including hiding money, hoarding money, spending money without your spouse knowing it, and the inability to consistently earn money. Financial Infidelity is the betrayal of your relationship with money to your spouse. With this episode you can turn your relationship with money into a positive experience that can be shared with your current or next spouse.
Kamie was virtually left to raise herself at 5 years old when her parents divorced. Her siblings weren't much older than her at the time. Listen to how Kamie nursed her estranged father to his death years later when no one else would or could. This is a most inspiring story of Unconditional Forgiveness.
Child Custody will be discussed using Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie as examples of multiple children in a marriage, some biologically connected to the spouses, and some who existed before the marriage and only to one spouse. What can be the options for child custody and child support if the non-biological children of one spouse have not be officially adopted by the other spouse, yet were raised by the non-biological spouse? This is the case in many divorces and can present a conundrum of decisions when filing for the divorce, and creating settlement agreements for custody and support.
Did you know that your chromosomal make-up can be one of the determining factors in your ability to have lasting relationships. Anastasia will share her research with 71 newlywed couples in how their chromosomes influenced the key emotions for healthy, long-lasting marriages: Gratitude, Trust, Forgiveness.
In this episode we take this quote from Tony Robbins, motivational speaker and life & business coach, to show how we can apply this concept to divorce. Divorce happens FOR us, not to us. Using this concept we keep us from being victims, will help us propel our lives forward, and reach our potential and levels of fulfillment that we once only dreamed of. Life and Divorce happen FOR us not to us.
In this episode we will disect what fear is and how it expresses itself in divorce. We will also look at common examples of fear in divorce and how to handle those fears as they surface, along with real life stories of the fear other couples are facing and why.
Matthew Smurda explores the aspects of Kim and Kanye's divorce, and Dr. Dre and Nicole's divorce. Although the numbers are bigger the issues and the law are all the same. Listen to Matthew break down the division of assets and debts, spousal support, and custody & co-parenting in so far as they affect our notable celebrities and our divorces, too. It's an interesting backdrop to learn about the components of a divorce filing.
We don't normally think of fashion and style going with divorce but the better we look and the better we feel allows us to make better decisions, be happier, and be more amicable when we either negotiate with our spouse for the settlement agreement, or show up in court. Holly will guide us through the internal and external conversion of our personal branding through fashion, and why knowing our fashion statement is important to our life statement. This goes for women as well as men.
We are launching year three of this podcast and renaming it THE Amicable Divorce Expert because my joy is to see couples going through divorce use this experience, this potentially very painful time, to forgive each other, stop blaming, and work together to create a respectful end to their journey as married people. I am also energized and refreshed to see divorcing couples begin a new life, which is the only way to turn divorce into something that becomes advantageous, a direction in life that can be more beneficial than staying married. Amicable is my gospel, my mantra, and the goal I try to help people achieve, through my divorce practice and through this podcast. Please continue this journey with me, and listen in this episode to how my life journey got me to be THE Amicable Divorce Expert!
Denial can ruin your life if what you are denying impedes your happiness, causes you sadness, and generally creates an unhealthy and unproductive life and relationship. Denial is a defense mechanism that in a temporary use can help you gather your thoughts, gain perspective, and monitor the issues that are causing you alarm. But longterm denial can ruin your life or make your life tougher than it needs to be. Self-compassion is your ticket out of denial and into making choices that are kinder and more productive for the best life you can live.
The #1 reason why people divorce is their incompatibility with money: Earning it, Spending it, and Saving it. Adam will not only show you how to discuss money, prioritize money, and find someone who is financially compatible with you. If you're divorcing, Adam will help you through making a settlement agreement that works, and to continue a co-parenting relationship in a financially successful way.
Gabrielle discusses the purpose for the book, explains her 5 steps to changing your state of being in order to have an amicable divorce, and daily exercises to redirect the way you think and how you respond to your spouse in divorce settlement talks and co-parenting.
As a former family law litigator, former Judge's assistant, and now a mediator and coach, Gabrielle sheds light on the reality of how Judge's make decisions, what's in store for you in court, and how mediation can save the day - if you're ready. Gabrielle shares stories and gives guidance to the right path for you in your divorce strategy.
I will explain and provide examples of what an uneven power dynamic looks like in a divorce settlement discussion. I will explain various reasons why the power dynamic exists. And I will provide ways to change the uneven power dynamic to an even balance of power for the best results for both spouses.
There are three stages in the evolution of being in a relationship: Formation, Gestation, and Breakdown. Dr. Wold will discuss each stage, and also explain how vulnerability and anger are connected in the Breakdown stage. Anger will be revealed in a way that will allow you to understand your own and your partner's anger, and either continue the relationship or use the understanding of anger to evolve out of the relationship in the best way possible.
There are several types of High Conflict Personalities (HCP) that will be described in this episode by quoting Bill Eddy, the international guru of legal disputes with HCPs. High Conflict Personalities have personality disorders to some degree and are hugely difficult to deal with in general, and almost impossible in legal disputes like divorces or paternity cases. Resolution will be provided as we discuss the HCPs you may have in your life.
Generally divorce is an issue of compromise, but there are those times when compromise cannot and should not be an option. This episode looks at the six typical situations in a divorce when compromise is not your best friend and hard decisions have to be made to move the divorce forward, and make settlement decisions in the best interest of the parties and their minor children.
Tia will share how her work as a detective dealt with how and why crimes of passion take place, and what you can do to avoid domestic violence that can lead to loss of life and chid abduction in a divorce. As a Psychic Tia helps her clients understand the reality of their relationships, whether they are healthy or not, and provides tools to use to change the course of their lives.
Jerusha will discuss the pros and cons of using social media to vent about relationship issues especially when it's about their divorce. Jerusha has used her own divorce along with her social media skills to develop an online support group for women of all ages but focusing on her social media generation of millennials and Gen-Zers.
Nicole and Richard went through the Emotional Divorce before filing for the Legal divorce. They are the best examples of how to uncouple with respect, without blame, and with self-awareness that allowed them to put their daughter first because they took care of their own emotional wellness first.
Paul A. Samakow will discuss how clients should work with attorneys for the best representation and results for their case; Paul's experience going through his own divorce; and why he felt his parents should have divorced but didn't.
Noam is a Men's Divorce Coach as a result of going through his own divorce. Noam also saw the underserved needs of divorcing dads, as as a dad himself, wanted to reach out and address those fears and concerns. And as a Rabbi, Noam started a podcast called The Jewish Divorce Project to specifically discuss the personal and religious issues of Jewish men going through divorce.
8 Ways to Ruin a Good Mediation. You will learn the most common ways to derail a simple and potentially good mediation, along with the 8 remedies to reverse course and succeed. Part of the mistakes people make are behavioral by not understanding how to communicate in a negotiation, and part of the mistakes come from preparation. You will learn all of the most common mistakes and how to reverse course to end up amicable and successful.
Custody Rights, Child Support, Step-Parent Rights, Presumed Parent Status and Best Interests of the Child will be discussed in depth as Blended Families are much more part of our society than ever before. Attorney Matthew Smurda will guide us through the complexities of parentage rights for non-biological parents.
Divorce is one of the most fearful experiences of our lives. It takes Courage to discuss divorce, tell our children about the divorce, discuss settlement terms for the divorce, and live as single people again. I will discuss how to identify the areas in which we need courage, and the importance of communication with our spouses in order to use divorce as positive events for a new beginning.
Learn how to gracefully navigate through the divorce filing and settlement with empowering techniques to help you communicate with your spouse to create a successful co-parenting schedule that accommodates small children and teens, rebuild self-worth and self-confidence, and shift to a positive mindset that is future-focused and healthy.
Joana will describe Mindfulness and explain how to practice it, and how Mindfulness can alleviate anxiety and fear while opening the door to a less stressful emotional environment from which to make decisions regarding the divorce settlement. SubTopics discussed will be Expressing Emotions, Balancing Emotions with our Physical Bodies, and Living in the Present Moment as a Way to Heal.
Graybill's approach to blended stepfamilies starts with the communication about parenting styles and parenting rules between the biological and new stepparent first, then transitions to a family Mission Statement that includes the children. Graybill also discusses how bringing the loss experienced from the divorce has to be acknowledged and dealt with as the biological, newly divorced parent enters another relationship that includes a blended family.
Terrie discusses Emotional Justice in the Legal Process, and helps you navigate the legal and financial process of divorce without being emotionally devastated.
Judy provides Amicable Solutions for issues that arise post divorce and issues that might create divorce and that have been documented in the news.
Polly Bloom, Divorce Coach discussing her approach to a more amicable divorce through strategies she uses in her divorce practice.
Forgiveness is important, especially in divorce, for control of our happiness and sense of freedom from the unexpected hurt from those we love. This episode will explore why and how to forgive under the worst circumstance for the happiest outcomes.
Immigration, Current Events and Divorce with Attorneys Humberto Gray of Gray Law and Warren Shiell of Warren Shiell Law.
Adult Child Support both during and after the divorce with the legal support to establish it is discussed.
A look behind the scenes of the challenges that mediators face when working with divorcing couples in order for you to make your upcoming mediation the best it can be.
Jeri's divorce lessons are about the importance of Planning, Co-Parenting, and Being a Single Mom.