Just One Thing: Recent Episodes
Brad and Lisa Stearns
A weekly discussion of small behaviors you can embrace to 1. Enhance your relationships, 2. Improve your heath, 3. Manage your stress, and 4. Just be happier. Your hosts Brad and Lisa Stearns have decades of experience working with folks like you to dramatically improve their lives with step-by-step changes.
Good communication is at the heart of good relationships and, ultimately, happiness. This week, Lisa and Brad explore how to employ conversational threading to dramatically improve your communication and attain greater closeness with family and friends.
Ever wondered how you can transform a mundane conversation into a deep, enriching interaction? Discover the power of conversational threading in our latest episode of Just One Thing, where we unpack the art of elaborating on responses to foster engaging and meaningful dialogues. Brad and Lisa explore how this technique can be especially transformative for introverts and discuss the adverse effects of our technology-driven world on conversational skills. By incorporating conversational threading into your daily interactions, you can develop relationships that are not only deeper but also more fulfilling and rewarding.
We also dive into the importance of effort and practice in personal growth and happiness. Brad shares his inspiring journey from being an introvert to becoming an engaging conversationalist through intentional practice. We emphasize that strong relationships, built on effective communication, are key to lifelong satisfaction—a claim backed by a long-term Harvard study. Whether it's for better jobs, love lives, or family connections, good communication is indispensable. Tune in for valuable insights and a heartfelt commitment to bringing you more consistent episodes aimed at enriching your relationships, health, and overall happiness.
Support the Show.
Recent studies have shown that increased generosity leads to increased happiness. This week, Lisa and Brad discuss how to go about being a bit more generous and explore things to watch out for, when doing so.
Discover the unexpected joy found in the simple act of giving, as we unravel the heartwarming connection between generosity and personal happiness. Have you ever felt a surge of warmth after offering a stranger your place in line, or experienced the profound fulfillment that comes from helping someone in need? This episode, brimming with touching anecdotes and insights, invites you into a world where small gestures lead to great rewards, and where the 'glow of giving' illuminates the path to a more contented life. From a fascinating Harvard study to our own life lessons, we're sharing how to find that sweet spot of generosity that doesn't just enrich the lives of recipients, but deeply enhances our own sense of well-being and community.
As we peel back the layers of what it really means to be generous, we examine not just the how, but the why, of giving. It's a delicate dance between fulfilling our own happiness and maintaining social sensitivity, ensuring that our gestures of kindness never leave others feeling uncomfortable or obligated. Delving into the evolutionary psychology that explains why we're wired to find joy in generosity, we also provide practical advice for integrating these acts into your daily routine. Whether it's through sharing your time, your expertise, or a simple smile, we guide you through understanding your unique ability to contribute and the profound impact it can have on both your life and the lives of others. Tune in for an inspiring discussion that might just shift your perspective on what it means to give, and the happiness that follows.
Support the Show.
Being vulnerable is scary and being purposely vulnerable takes practice and awareness. This week, Lisa and Brad explore the advantages that vulnerability can have on your relationships and overall well being.
When the walls come down, what's left to discover about ourselves and each other? Lisa and I dare to unravel the art of vulnerability in a heart-to-heart exchange that promises to redefine strength and connection. Through personal revelations, we confront the pressures of societal norms and gender expectations, shedding light on why baring our souls feels risky yet can be remarkably rewarding. Our discussion isn't just for men wrestling with competitive environments, but for anyone who's ever felt hesitant to admit they don't have all the answers. As we dissect the balance between opening up and self-preservation, you'll learn why discernment is your ally in the delicate act of sharing your true self.
Witness a candid exploration of vulnerability as a cornerstone in relationship building across personal partnerships and even the most casual of interactions. Our conversation takes us from the intimacy of my own relationship journey, where revealing insecurities has drawn my partner and me closer, to the unexpected places like the gym, where my admissions of struggle work to inspire openness in others. This episode isn't merely about the softening of our exterior; it's a profound acknowledgment of vulnerability's role as a teacher and a bridge to deeper human connections. Join Lisa and me as we celebrate the surprising power and the nuanced dance of vulnerability, transforming how we relate, grow, and succeed together.
Support the Show.
Many times, our efforts just don't match up to our own expectations, or those of our friends and family. This week, Lisa and Brad discuss how to accept that "you are always enough," even when it may not seem so.
Feeling overwhelmed by the relentless pursuit of perfection? You're not alone. Join us, Brad and Lisa Stearns, as we unpack the liberating concept of radical self-acceptance in our transformative heart-to-heart chat. We shed light on the personal struggles and societal pressures that often lead us to believe we're never quite "enough." Sharing our own stories, we illustrate how recognising and embracing our limitations can be the first step toward genuine contentment. Life's relentless demands often make it seem impossible to excel in every area, but here we affirm the power of acknowledging that your best effort, no matter the capacity, is always enough.
Embark on a journey of self-discovery with us as we discuss the subtle art of detaching from the pressure of expectations to find a more fulfilling existence. We delve into the natural shifts that come with aging, the biological changes we face, and how these can influence our competitive drives and pursuit of happiness. Discover how cultivating compassion and generosity can lead to a contented life, while practical strategies like affirmations can help combat that inner critic. Together, we explore how freeing ourselves from constant comparison can unlock a deep satisfaction with life, as we celebrate the idea that personal well-being triumphs over external achievements.
Support the show
Studies have shown that the true secret to lifetime happiness is the quality of your connections. This week, Lisa and Brad explore how having deeper conversations can enhance the quality of your connections.
Have you ever found yourself trapped in a cycle of monotonous small talk, yearning to break free and forge genuine connections? Our conversation today is a treasure trove of strategies for anyone eager to transform their chit-chat into memorable interactions that resonate on a deeper level. As we reminisce about the lost art of conversational mastery, I share my own journey towards becoming a more engaged listener and inquisitive converser. With insights from our guest, a networking sage, we unpack the subtle yet powerful techniques of sparking dialogue with observations and meaningful questions. Whether you're an introvert who dreads ice-breakers or an extrovert looking to add depth to your discussions, this episode is your guide to winning friends and influencing people—one conversation at a time.
This session isn't just about talking—it's about listening, responding, and connecting in ways that leave a lasting impression. We'll explore the FBI negotiator's playbook for establishing rapport swiftly and dive into the practicalities of preparing for conversations with new acquaintances. By sharing anecdotes and coaching tips, we demonstrate the importance of curiosity and empathy in building emotional bonds. So, whether you're hoping to rekindle the flame of a long-time friendship or spark a new one at the gym, tune in and equip yourself with the tools to elevate every conversation from mundane to meaningful.
Support the show
Major life transitions are frequent and usually difficult. This week, Lisa and Brad explore life transitions and discuss ways to more effectively navigate them, maintaining more equanimity and acceptance.
As we traverse the ever-shifting landscape of our lives, each transition carves into our identity like water shapes the earth. Today, we share a raw and intimate conversation about wrestling with the loss of youth and the dawning of older age, a topic that deeply resonates with many. We peel back the layers of anxiety and identity crisis that accompany these life chapters, and offer a space to grieve the past while embracing the future. Whether it's the decline of physical prowess or the appearance of new health challenges, we confront the real emotions tied to these changes and the delicate art of redefining who we are.
In our latest episode, we don't just recount stories; we immerse ourselves in the experience of them. Join us for a candid exploration of confronting physical limitations during a transformative yoga retreat, where we face our vulnerabilities head-on. It's a testament to the power of living in the present, whether it means savoring victories or sitting with discomfort. We unpack the notion that it's not only acceptable but necessary to acknowledge when life's rough tides knock us off course. If you've ever felt adrift amidst the ebbs and flows of life's transitions, let this discussion be your beacon, lighting the path toward self-compassion and a renewed sense of self.
Support the show
Smart choices are usually hard choices, think going to the gym instead of Netflix or broccoli instead of cake. This week, Lisa and Brad explore why our best choices are usually somewhat unpleasant and how to overcome this dilemma , at least some of the time.
Ever wondered why it's just so hard to pass up a slice of cake for a stalk of broccoli? Join us and our co-host Lisa as we get real about the challenges of making smart, healthy choices in a world teeming with tasty temptations. We're not just talking greens and grains; we're peeling back the layers of our evolutionary cravings for the sweet, the salty, and the downright fatty. It's a candid reflection on our own food journeys, the pitfalls of self-criticism, and how we're learning to love the choices that love us back, one nutritious bite at a time.
In this heart-to-heart, we also unveil our toolkit for tackling the procrastination beast and seamlessly weaving those wise decisions into our lives. Starting small can lead to big changes, and we're all about celebrating the victories—whether it's saying 'yes' to veggies or finding joy in a jog around the block. Plus, we'll let you in on how a little reward can go a long way to make the mundane magnificent. So, hit play for a dose of motivation and perhaps a new perspective on giving yourself that pat on the back for choosing what's good for you. Let's embrace our unique strengths and toast—to a happier, healthier you!
Support the show
Having a solid morning routine can greatly improve your life. This week, Lisa and Brad explore how to construct a morning routine that will make a positive difference.
When I was grappling with the darkest period of my life, suffocating under the weight of ill health, it was the discovery of a morning routine that breathed new life into my days. Inspired by Hal Elrod's "The Miracle Morning," I embraced the S.A.V.E.R.S. philosophy, and it's this journey of transformation that I'm thrilled to unfold for you. Embarking on this episode, we navigate through the potent mix of Silence, Affirmations, Visualization, Exercise, Reading, and Scribing, examining how these elements can be tailored to fit any lifestyle, from those who have the luxury of time to others who can spare only minutes at dawn. It's a candid reveal of my personal evolution, a testament to the power these practices hold in fueling productivity, fostering positivity, and enhancing well-being.
As the sun peeks over the horizon, many of us face the familiar foe of morning dread—a slumbering dragon that I, too, once fought every day. In this heart-to-heart, I share the tactics that helped me slay that beast: grounding myself in gratitude, indulging in affirmations, and steering clear of the mental 'bad place playground.' We discuss the importance of being present and how it can reshape our morning narrative, setting us on a path to happiness and success. Every one of us has a default routine, but with intention and practice, we can forge a routine that serves as our ally. So whether you're a perennial snoozer or the kind who greets the dawn with open arms, let's discover together how mornings can be a launchpad for a life that soars.
Support the show
Rumination can be very difficult to deal with and can negatively impact your day to day happiness. This week, Lisa and Brad discuss how to recognize rumination and how to better cope with it, when it appears.
Ever found yourself trapped in a whirlwind of thoughts that just won't quit? That's the rumination rollercoaster, and it's a ride many of us know all too well. Join us as we dissect this sneaky cognitive loop that masquerades as problem-solving but actually hinders our mental health and relationships. Reflecting on our own battles with these persistent thought patterns, we dive into the nuances that separate rumination from worry and obsession. More importantly, we're here to equip you with the know-how to recognize when your brain is stuck on replay and share actionable strategies to help manage and alleviate the relentless cycle.
Have you ever wished you could turn down the volume on your overthinking? We get it, and we've been there. That's why this episode is not just about understanding rumination; it's about transforming our approach to it. With an empathetic nod to the human psyche, we discuss how to embrace mindfulness techniques that can steer your thoughts toward calmer seas. Hear about the personal journey of reducing overthinking by a significant margin, and discover how mantras and reflective questioning can serve as your anchors. By tuning in, you'll learn the art of catching yourself mid-spiral and consciously redirecting your mind to the present—because sometimes, the best way to move forward is to pause and breathe. Don't forget to subscribe for more episodes focused on fostering a healthier, more centered you.
Support the show
It's human nature to want to keep score and, at the same time, doing so is almost certainly damaging your relationships. This week, Lisa and Brad discuss how to recognize when you're keeping score, how to break the habit , and build better more trusting relationships.
Have you ever found yourself silently tallying who does more in your relationship? It's a battle I've fought too, and this week, we're peeling back the layers on the delicate topic of scorekeeping in partnerships. In a candid exploration, we delve into why this habit can be so corrosive, sharing personal stories that shed light on how an expectation mismatch can sow the seeds of resentment. We'll also discuss the often invisible contributions each partner makes and underscore the critical role of communication in recognizing and valuing these efforts.
Navigating the balance of chores and emotional labor can be like walking a tightrope, but it's a highwire act we're all too familiar with. This episode takes an honest look at how partners can fall into the trap of scorekeeping and the importance of establishing an equitable division of labor and emotional investment. We dissect how mutual understanding and adaptability can counteract the sneaky creep of inequality, ensuring that love isn't lost amidst the daily grind of reciprocal obligations. It's a conversation about the beauty of flexibility and patience in love's intricate dance.
Closing the discussion, we turn our attention to strategies for overcoming the tally mentality. From the wisdom of "Crucial Conversations," we extract tools for creating a "shared pool of meaning" with your partner, a concept that can revolutionize the way you align expectations. We'll guide you through the early signs of scorekeeping, the art of initiating transformative dialogues, and embracing a collective approach to fulfilling each other's needs. Join us for an episode that promises not just insights but actionable steps to building a stronger, more harmonious union.
Support the show
Improper breathing can actually cause poor health and magnify anxiety. This week, Lisa and Brad explore what a healthy breath feels like and how learning to breath correctly can be your first step on the path to health, happiness, and more mindful living.
Discover the unexpected key to serenity that's been with you all along—your breath. Within this heartfelt discussion, we delve into how something as intrinsic as the way we breathe can have a profound impact on our stress levels and mental well-being. I offer a glimpse into my own transformation, from the clutches of chronic shallow breathing to the liberation of mindful belly breaths, despite my lungs' limited capacity. Join us as we unravel the physiological secrets behind breath's influence on our bodies and minds, and share practical techniques to help you transition to a more relaxed and beneficial breathing pattern.
We also take a reflective journey into the past, examining how our childhood experiences shape our breathing habits and set the stage for our future selves. It's a chapter of introspection and awareness, where the focus is on self-observation and the recognition of our breath as a powerful tool for personal growth. No guest needed when we're exploring the intimate narratives of our own lives and the subtle yet substantial shifts that can arise from simply being more present with each inhale and exhale. Tune in for an episode that promises not just to inform, but to transform the way you breathe and, consequently, how you face the world.
Support the show
The need always be right has a negative impact on all of your relationships. This week, Lisa and Brad discuss this incessant need to be right, exploring why it is so harmful and examining ways, with awareness and practice, it can be overcome.
Imagine a recent evening spent with friends, laughter echoing around the room, until a dispute over a game rule brings a sudden chill. We've all been there, right? That's the springboard for our heartfelt discussion on why prioritizing harmony in our relationships can be more fulfilling than the relentless pursuit of proving oneself correct. We navigate the delicate balance of standing your ground versus embracing peace for the collective happiness, all while sharing relatable anecdotes and a dose of self-reflection. Join us as we uncover the hidden costs of the 'I'm right' syndrome and discover strategies for fostering healthier, more trusting connections.
As we peel back the layers of our need for control, we encounter the pivotal role of humility. Disagreements, especially over the little things, can add unnecessary weight to our closest bonds. We probe into how a simple catchphrase can serve as a powerful tool to combat the urge to assert dominance through being right. Without shying away from our vulnerabilities, we candidly discuss embracing our imperfections and the transformative power this can have on our relationships. Tune in for an episode that promises introspection and perhaps, a gentle nudge towards a more respectful and harmonious way of living.
Support the show
Everyone has a different set of talents and recognizing that fact can go a long way in improving your relationships. This week, Lisa and Brad explore exactly what talents are, and provide examples that you can use to understand why unrecognized talent disparity can cause so many relationship problems.
Ever marveled at someone's effortless charisma or envied another's punctuality? This week's episode peels back the layers of human talents, examining the rich variety that makes each of us extraordinary. I unravel the tapestry of attributes, from the way Lisa masterfully sidesteps procrastination to why some struggle with the concept of 'time blindness.' It's an exploration into acknowledging that the talents we admire in others may not come as naturally to us, and that's perfectly okay.
Venture with me into the often overlooked corners of innate abilities and their undeniable influence on our personal and professional interactions. We're not all cut from the same cloth when it comes to skills like communication and empathy, and that's a game-changer in how we approach success. Without a guest to distract us, we get down to the nitty-gritty of managing expectations and fostering growth by embracing the unique talents each of us brings to the table. Join me, and together let's sculpt a life that not only celebrates our distinct gifts but also forges stronger, more empathetic connections with the people in our lives.
Support the show
For better or worse, your parents establish social and relationship expectations that become a long list of "should do's" in your subconscious. This week, Lisa and Brad explore this "voice in your head" and discuss the ways you can break free.
Ever felt burdened by the weight of expectations, especially those ingrained by our mothers? Dive headfirst into this riveting exploration as we, Brad and Lisa Stearns, guide you through the maze of societal and familial expectations, often colored by the lens of maternal teachings. We unmask the guilt, obligation, and emotional drain these expectations can unfold, challenging you to question their validity and choose whether to adhere or break away from these inherited norms, especially during the emotionally charged holiday season.
Ever noticed how the 'mom's voice' has subtly influenced your choices and steered your actions? We elevate this conversation to recognize this internalized voice, its evolution, and its undeniable impact on our lives. Through candid discussions, we stress on setting personal boundaries, making decisions that resonate with your well-being, even if they clash with the expectations of others. Remember, the journey to recognizing and managing this voice requires practice and unwavering commitment. Tune in and awaken to the influence your 'mom's voice' has on your thoughts and actions, and transform your life into a fulfilling and mindful journey.
Support the show
A mindful staycation is the perfect solution for dealing with burnout and stress. This week, Lisa and Brad discuss the benefits of a mindful staycation and present several activities that can make it both healing and enjoyable.
Are you ready to shake up your life and cultivate a more mindful existence, all within the comfort of your own home? This episode is brimming with enlightening strategies to create a rejuvenating and invigorating staycation. We'll share the benefits of such a break from routines, help you understand how to embrace discomfort, and guide you to become more aware of your thoughts and emotions. We also shed light on the power of breaking free from unhealthy habits and replacing them with more recovery-oriented and stress-reducing practices.
Do you believe that mindfulness activities require an extravagant budget? Think again! We'll challenge your perceptions and prove that mindfulness can be attained even through simple and creative activities like taking a bath or playing with play-doh. It's about exploring the sensations in our body and questioning our assumptions about the “ick” of sitting in our own dirt. We also explore how weather, often seen as a hindrance, can actually be a catalyst for softening our inner selves and exploring our strong emotions. Plus, we share resources and ideas to kick-start your mindful journey and remind listeners about our free book of mindful activities. Let's embark on this journey of mindfulness together!
Support the show
What seem to be negative encounters are unavoidable, as we go about our daily business, and each will elicit an almost uncontrollable stress response. This week, Lisa and Brad explore these constant social stressors and discuss a few techniques to get yourself out of the resultant negative thought loops.
Ever wonder why something as petty as someone cutting the line at Panera can send you spiraling into a stress response? Get ready to expose and explore the biology behind our fear responses, the impact of long-term stress on our health, and the sheer number of thoughts we have each day that can make it hard to stay present.
Let's journey together into the realm of self-forgiveness, understanding our natural wiring, and the art of thought reframing. We'll share strategies for scripting a different narrative, a method that helps us restructure negative thoughts. Discover how reframing our perception of daily events and interactions can foster an atmosphere of grace and forgiveness, ultimately reducing stress. Brace yourself for a deep dive into everyday forgiveness and stress management!
Support the show
All humans crave control in their lives, especially in volatile times. This week, Lisa and Brad explore just how little control we really have and discuss strategies for dealing with this uncertainty.
Ever wondered why we constantly crave control, even when life continually proves how unpredictable it can be? Buckle up for a profound exploration into the 'illusion of control' that we're all subconsciously wired to believe. We dissect our deep-seated need for control, tracing it back to our ancestors who sought to control their environment, leading to the birth of various superstitions and religions. We dig deep into the paradox of control, discussing how our brains are designed to keep us safe but also how this can lead us to harbor false beliefs and create unnecessary stress in our lives.
But hold on, it's not all doom and gloom! We're diving into the liberating idea of 'letting go of control', highlighting the importance of acknowledging what's within our control and what's not. We share how this simple yet profound realization can invite peace and calm into our lives. From the power of mindfulness and meditation to the value of owning our reactions to life's unpredictable twists and turns, we're dropping truth bombs galore. So, tune in, open your mind, and prepare for a journey towards personal growth, acceptance, and a new perspective on control. Your life might just depend on it!
Support the show
There are times when your mind just won't stop racing. This week, Lisa and Brad explore this unpleasant experience and describe techniques you can use to alleviate your distress.
Ever wake up at the bewitching hour of 4 or 5 in the morning with your mind spiraling out of control? Fear not, we've been there too, and it's not as scary as it seems. This episode is all about our personal struggle with these racing thoughts, a phenomenon possibly tied to biarrhythms, and how we've learned to manage it. We go in-depth about how our brains are wired to seek out fear and how, armed with this knowledge, we can step in and prevent our mind from spiraling into panic.
By sharing our personal experiences, we take you through the mindfulness techniques that have been a game changer for us. Focusing on positive words, employing affirmations, and putting a halt to negative thoughts are some of the strategies we talk about. We also delve into the importance of consistency in practice for successfully managing racing thoughts. We guide you on how to choose the right mindfulness tool and commit to a regular practice, reminding you that it doesn't have to be perfect right away. Stick with us as we tackle these seemingly insurmountable spirals and teach you how to wrestle back control from your racing thoughts.
Support the show
Facing setbacks is inevitable, and learning how to deal with them is a major factor in your overall level of happiness and life satisfaction. This week, Lisa and Brad discuss a 3 step process for dealing with setbacks, whether big or small.
Support the show
Good, healthy relationships are filled with positive comments and supportive dialogue, This week, Lisa and Brad explore the many phrases and conversations that give a great relationship a specific sound.
This week, Lisa and Brad continue the discussion of alternative medicine and take a deeper dive into some of the modalities that they have found useful.
There are many valid healing modalities within the overall sphere of alternative medicine. This week, Lisa and Brad talk about their own experiences within the realm of alternative medicine, focusing on acupuncture, trigger point therapy, and deep tissue massage.
Noise can be a powerful source of stress and silence can be an extremely healing experience. This week, Lisa and Brad explore the many ways that too much noise and too little silence can effect your life and your overall well being.
Quality sleep can improve you overall health and vitality as well as actually extend your life. This week, Lisa and Brad discuss the many ways in which you can get a better night's sleep.
Tasks and projects invariably take longer than you think they will. This week, Lisa and Brad explore this reality and discuss ways to deal with it and keep yourself on track.
We all have so many competing activities in our lives, that it's often hard to really accomplish the things that are of highest priority. This week, Lisa and Brad discuss how to use your schedule/calendar to make sure you get those most important tasks completed and keep yourself moving toward your best life.
The last three years have produced profound loss, and a resultant sense of grief, in almost everyone. This week, Lisa and Brad explore this societal grief and discuss how you might begin to take the steps necessary for healing. Paradoxically, most don't even recognize that what they are feeling is grief.
This week, Lisa and Brad continue the discussion about setting better goals, focusing on prioritizing, identifying smaller enabling goals, and making sure that your goals don't conflict with one another.
Setting and achieving your goals is the best way to get what you want in life. Unfortunately, setting appropriate goals is easier said than done. This week, Lisa and Brad begin the exploration of how to set better goals, goals that are achievable and that will guide you toward the life you desire.
Engaging in any kind of artistic activity can dramatically increase your moment to moment happiness and reduce stress, if you embrace the right mindset. This week, Lisa and Brad discuss how to "do some art" in such a way that you not only increase your joy, but you'll also be quite pleased with the result.
Kindness has a positive ripple effect that can greatly improve society and make you happier. This week, Lisa and Brad discuss how to incorporate kindness into your day and explore the societal and personal benefits that can accrue.
Few things will improve your social connections as much as improving your conversation skills. This week, Lisa and Brad discuss how to go about improving your conversations skills and explore why it is so important to do so.
Building a successful long-term relationship requires finding an optimal balance between the time you spend doing things for yourself, and by yourself, and the time you spend doing meaningful things together as a couple. This week, Lisa and Brad explore how to recognize that you need both Me Time and We Time and then how to find the right balance between the two as your relationship evolves.
The reward centers in your brain can cause you to actually become addicted to anxiety. This week, Brad and LIsa explore how you might fall victim to the anxiety habit and how you can begin to break this unpleasant cycle.
A rainy day offers a perfect opportunity to explore various aspects of mindfulness. In this episode, Brad and Lisa discuss the many ways you can leverage a rainy day to begin embracing a more mindful way of living, finding the joy in moment-to-moment experience.
Curiosity is one of the primary sources of both increased happiness and greater agency. This week we discuss the various types of curiosity, how it can promote greater joy, and how to become more curious.
This week we continue the discussion of triggering by focusing on the topic of co-triggering, between couples, and how to begin doing trigger repair. We are convinced that recognizing and learning to effectively deal with triggers, is one of the most powerful things a couple can do to improve their relationship.
The first step in learning to move from triggered to tranquil is to quickly detect when you are being triggered, and pause. This week Lisa and Brad exploree how to identify your predominant trigger signature and learn to pause and regulate your out of control emotions.
We begin the fourth season of "Just One Thing" with an exploration of what it means to be triggered. Everyone gets triggered, probably every day. It's what you do after you're triggered that makes the difference. In our next few episodes we'll help you move from "triggered to tranquil."
We all need to take periodic breaks to be at our best. Whether we are doing something physically or mentally, we cannot just keep pushing forever without adverse consequences. This week, Lisa and Brad discuss how to tell when you need a break, and most importantly, how to give yourself permission to take it.
You can turn an unhappy situation around by learning to develop alternative stories about what's going on. We almost never know what's actually going on in someone else's mind so, this week, Lisa and Brad, explore the benefits of learning to consistently develop more positive explanations of people's behavior.
Approaching life with Beginners Mind is one of the real secrets of greater happiness. This week, Lisa and Brad define Beginners Mind and explore how you can cultivate it for greater joy.
Affirmations may seem like new age voodoo, but they really do work. This week, Lisa and Brad take a deeper dive into affirmation magic, exploring their own experience and how you too can employ affirmations to improve your life.
Most people are good and compassionate, given the chance. This week, Lisa and Brad explore how your entire world can change for the better when you approach others with a spirit of compassion.
Reframing your situation is a quick and proven way to provide more joy in your life. This week, Lisa and Brad explore two questions that can be used to reframe everyday challenges.
No two people attain happiness in the same way. This week, Lisa and Brad discuss how to go about composing your own unique script for finding joy.
Every once in a while, you can learn a lot by taking a break from all of your routines and listening to what your inner voice is telling you. This week, Lisa and Brad explore the value taking a compete day off and using it as a learning experience to enhance your happiness and long-term well being.
Beginning any new activity is rarely easy. Yet learning new skills and mastering new knowledge is one of the surest paths to increased well being. This week, Lisa and Brad discuss how you can overcome the frustration that often attends learning new skills and and gaining new competencies.
Sometimes competitiveness can take you where you want to go and at other times it can destroy relationships. This week, Lisa and Brad discuss when competitiveness is good, when it's bad, and when it's just plain ugly. Beware.
Most mindfulness practices talk about non-attachment as a way to greater well-being. This week, Lisa and Brad discuss what non-attachment actually is, why it is a part of achieving more happiness, and most importantly, how you can start to develop it..
Almost everyone is vulnerable to negative thought loops that can dramatically impact their well being. This week, Lisa and Brad explore how to identify these dangerous thought patterns and overcome them.
Eating mindfully is both a perfect way to introduce mindfulness into your life and a method for improving your eating habits. This week, Lisa and Brad explore how to go about incorporating mindful eating into your mealtimes.
After the turmoil of the past year, many are feeling guilty about feeling and expressing their own happiness. This week, Lisa and Brad discuss why it's so important to embrace, cultivate and share your happiness and outright joy. Don't hold back.
Knowing how to disagree is a skill that you can develop. Having this skill is especially important these days. This week, Brad and Lisa explore how to go about disagreeing while still maintaining great relationships.
Having appropriate balance in your life is important. That dos not mean that you treat all of your efforts equally. This week, Lisa and Brad discuss what balance really means and how to go about achieving it.
Almost everyone suffers from procrastination, from time to time. This week, Lisa and Brad talk about the sources of procrastination and, most importantly, how you can overcome this insidious behavior. To achieve your best life, you'll need to address procrastination.
Experiencing prolonged silence is rare for most, yet can provide significant insight and benefits. This week, Lisa and Brad discuss their own experiences with days of silence and explore what they have learned as a result.
It's hard to believe, but repeating positive phrases to yourself can significantly improve your self image and sense of well being. This week, Lisa and Brad explore the power of affirmations, how to construct them and how to employ them.
Believe it or not, simply putting words on paper can have a powerful effect on your well being. This week, Brad and Lisa explore the many ways that you can journal and discuss some of the science behind why it works. Even those who hate to write can find easy and powerful ways to journal.
Most folks have noticeable daily and seasonal emotional ups and downs. This week, Brad and Lisa discuss these emotional rhythms, how to notice them and, most importantly, how to deal with them. You don't have to be a prisoner of your emotional rhythms.
There are many misconceptions about meditation that prevents folks from embracing the practice. This week, Lisa and Brad dispel all of these myths that surround what is actually a very easy and beneficial activity. Meditation can improve nearly every aspect of your life.
No matter your current disposition or circumstances, you can learn to be happier. This week, Brad and Lisa explore science based methods that allow you to dramatically enhance your day-to-day well being.
If you don't take care of yourself, you'll soon be unable to care for anyone else. This week, Brad and Lisa explore the importance of self care and delineate several ways you can incorporate self care into your life. Once you learn to value yourself, you can better care for and value others.
Forging a deep and abiding relationship is never easy. This week Brad and Lisa explore how to take your relationship to the next level with open communication. Open discussion can be very uncomfortable, but is so worth the effort.
This week Brad and Lisa continue the discussion of techniques that you can use to provide immediate relief from your anxiety. Although some of these methods take a bit of practice, most are usable by complete mindfulness beginners.
Almost everyone experiences anxiety, these days more than ever. This week Brad and Lisa explore the origins of anxiety and provide several techniques that you can use to immediately alleviate the uncomfortable sensations and reduce its negative impact. Really, they can help right now.
We often become trapped by our habits, whether they are good or bad. This week, Brad and Lisa explore how habits can negatively impact your life and how you can regain more choice in your day-to-day actions and behavior. Don't just blindly do what you've always done.
One person's heaven is often another person's hell. This week, Brad and Lisa explore the implications of the wide range of likes and dislikes that individuals exhibit and offer strategies for better understanding and dealing with that variability. Don't assume that everyone is going to like what you do.
We often prevent ourselves from moving forward by setting the bar for progress too high. This week, Brad and Lisa talk about expecting too much of ourselves and how to make small steps forward to achieve your goals.
Contrary to some recent backlash, Mindfulness does not make you passive. This week, Brad and Lisa explore how Mindfulness is actually a powerful tool that can help you achieve, business, athletic, and productivity goals. Don't be scared away from Minduflness because you think it will take away your "edge."
Every day we have the opportunity to make a positive impact on the world. This week, Brad and Lisa explore how you can make a difference for good, in your home, in your city, and in the world. Whether you know it or not, you have the power.
Don't be driven and overwhelmed by the many TO DO items filling your day. Instead, consider creating a TO BE list filled with the types of things you'd like to become, more patient, courageous, outgoing, etc. This week Brad and Lisa tell you how to create and pursue that TO BE list.
Is that holiday To Do list causing too much stress? This week Brad and Lisa explore how to mindfully pare down your traditions so that you optimize your joy and minimize your stress. It's not always easy, but well worth the effort.
Many claim they don't have an inner voice. In reality, everyone has multiple voices in their head at once. This week, Brad and Lisa explore how to find and listen to all of the messaging in your head and use that knowledge to chart a path toward the life you desire.
Sometimes the situation is so alarming that your mindfulness tools just don't seem to work. This week, Brad and Lisa discuss realistic expectations for a mindfulness practice and how to raise the bar with consistent practice. Like anything, the more you put in, the more you get out.
Uncomfortable and painful emotions are an inevitable part of life. This week Brad and Lisa discuss how to enhance your long-term well being by better understanding your emotions and becoming more comfortable with them. Hard work, but so worth while.
If you're not careful, you can fill your life with "should do's" that detract from your well being and leave you no time to pursue your life's purpose. This week, Brad and Lisa explore how to escape "should do's" and find time to spend on "want to do's."
Very often, your oh so human brain tricks you into wanting the wrong things, making you more unhappy, in the long-run. This week Brad and Lisa take a deep-dive into this phenomenon of mis-wanting and how to deal with it. Forewarned is forearmed.
Taking appropriate amounts of free time is a struggle for many. This week Brad and Lisa explore how free time enhances both your productivity and overall sense of well being. Far from being lazy, free time is essential to a life well lived.
Is there an upper limit to how happy you can be? This week Brad and Lisa explore whether or not there is an upper limit to your happiness and how you can go about optimizing your pursuit of well being. Learn to use a variety of techniques and practices to become happier and happier.
Social Connection has proven to be an almost magical ingredient for improving you happiness and overall life satisfaction. This week, Brad and Lisa explore how to increase the number and improve the quality of your social connections. These techniques work, even for introverts.
This week, Brad and Lisa discuss mindfulness, what it is, how you go about it, and what benefit it provides. Developing mindfulness is a super power within anyone's reach. It can make you both happier and healthier.
Honing your sense of gratitude is a powerful antidote to adversity and feelings of helplessness or victimhood. Its especially useful in countering the many negative emotions and life experiences surrounding the Covid pandemic. This week Lisa and Brad discuss how you can better evoke and strengthen your sense of gratitude.
Everyone seems to be angry right now. This week we explore why that is so, if it's okay, and what to do about it. Anger is a powerful emotion and knowing how to recognize it and effectively deal with it is vital for both physical and mental health.
At this time, no one knows whether or how quickly the economy will recover or what the trajectory of the Corona Virus will be. This week, Brad and Lisa explore how to deal with this uncertainty and maybe figure out what's next for you.
Finding time for uninterrupted work, exercise, or just being alone is impossible when we're all sheltering in place, unless you make the effort to firmly establish boundaries. This week, Brad and Lisa talk you through the steps of establishing realistic boundaries and reenforce why it is so important to do so.
The world is in turmoil right now and a little extra patience goes a long way in helping you deal with the new realities. This week Brad and Lisa explore how you can cultivate a little more patience and bring a bit more happiness back into your life.
Keeping fit during this time of lock downs and "shelter in place" is not easy for many. This week, Brad and Lisa explore ways you can keep fit and actually improve fitness while stuck at home and also discuss whether or not you should even worry about staying fit.
Too much routine can be a bad thing, especially when we are all stuck "sheltering in place." This week Brad and Lisa explore the potential downside of too much routine and provide examples of what to do to change things up, when needed.
Great relationships don't just happen. You need to actively engage with others, pay attention, and be interested, to help your relationships to flourish. This week, Lisa and Brad explore the dangers of too much coasting in your relationships and what to do instead.
Everyone is now dealing with disrupted routines. For many, this leads to feelings of anxiety, irritation, and even anger. This week Brad and Lisa explore how to navigate this situation and maybe be a little more agreeable with those around you..
Too many confuse what they're good at with what they love or pursue a career or life path purely for financial gain and then find themselves stressed or unhappy. This week Brad and Lisa do a deep dive on how to find the trajectory you really want to be on and move away from what you do't want to do.
Before verbally assaulting someone or offering input, consider what you're going to say: is it True, Is it Helpful, is it Inspiring, is it Necessary, is it Kind. This week Brad and Lisa explore this powerful communication and relationship building technique.
Experiencing discomfort in the pursuit of a higher end, or goal, is almost inevitable. This week, Brad and Lisa talk about how to best manage that discomfort and, where possible, minimize or eliminate it.
Although it may have its place, your inner critic will ultimately stand in the way of achieving your goals and, it will definitely kill your happiness. In this episode, Brad and Lisa explore a few ways to identify and tame that inner critic that we all have.
In today's environment, almost everyone is susceptible to binge eating. The negative health implications can be extreme. Today Brad and Lisa explore ways to mitigate binge eating.
Establishing and maintaining personal boundaries is not easy. It can elicit conflict and it requires significant emotional intelligence and strong communication skills. This week, Brad and Lisa explore this difficult topic,
Most times, arguing is not productive and does not take you where you want to go. This week, Brad and Lisa discuss alternatives to arguing in dealing with conflict and disagreement. It take practice but you can almost always come up with a win/win solution.
Long term consistency with any effort requires that you periodically assess how well it fits within your current physical and mental capacities and then making appropriate revisions, where necessary. This week Brad and Lisa discuss how important these periodic revisions are and provide guidance on how to go about it.
Most New Year's resolutions are doomed to fail. This week Lisa and Brad discuss better alternatives to the annual resolution and ways to improve success if you still choose to go the traditional route. You can change, you can improve!
Having contingency plans, that go into effect when life happens, is the key to long term success. This week, Lisa and Brad discuss what to do when things get in the way of improving yourself. If this happens, then that goes into effect.
The holidays are full of tempting foods. The advice we give our clients is to indulge, eat that cookie, but do so mindfully. This week Lisa and Brad talk about developing a healthy relationship with food that allows you to enjoy special occasions while staying on track with your health and fitness goals.
Too many experience a significant amount of stress around the year-end holidays. In this episode, Brad and Lisa discuss how to eliminate this holiday stress, using strategies that they have implemented over the years. Happy Holidays to all.
As you make progress on yourself and improving your life, it is critically important to take the time to celebrate each small step along the way. Celebrating reenforces the behaviors you're trying to improve, taking advantage of the brain's own reward system. Take the time to pause, savor, celebrate, and bask in your success.
This week we discuss whether or not you can have it all. Our conclusion, yes, but you may need to balance and prioritize and even reshape your definition of "having it all." Listen and learn.
In celebration of our 40th wedding anniversary, Lisa and I discuss what it takes to make a long-term relationship work. Its not always easy, but its always worthwhile. Listen and learn.
Working hard alone is simply not enough to reach you goals. Your hard work must fit within a plan or vision to have the benefits you desire. This week we discuss how to aim your hard work in the right direction and avoid the pitfalls of simple busyness.
Staying with a project or effort that takes months or years requires special skills and strategies. This week we explore how to "stick with it" in the face of life's ups and downs. Even if you find staying the course difficult, we have some tips that can make you successful.
Learning to move forward in the face of fear is one of the most transformative skills you can master. This week we talk about how to identify your fears and break them down into manageable chunks that you can to deal with. We give specific examples and delve into how the brain's reward system can then make you a truly more confident person.
We all have super powers. Identifying them and learning how to best leverage them is a bit tricky. This week we discuss all things super power related.
Sometimes the best thing you can do for yourself is to just "Press Pause" and step away from your need to move forward. Renewal and refreshment await, but there may be some pitfalls to be aware of.
This week we discuss how and when to press that pause button.
Prioritizing, learning how to first identify and then work on your most important tasks and goals is one of the most valuable life skills you can master. Today we discuss how to go about prioritizing, things to watch out for, and how to find a way to prioritize that works for you.
We all need help from time-to-time, but asking for help is very difficult for most of us. In this episode we explore why it's important to ask for help when you need it, why it can be so scary, and how to better recognize when you do need help and effectively ask for it.
Achieving goals often starts with a list, but a list is not enough. To actually get things done you need to prioritize items, turn them into definable actions, and realistically evaluate how much is actually doable. At some point, items that have been on your "to do" list too long, need to be purged.
Don't be a person who confuses making a list with actually getting things done.
There are times when you need uninterrupted focus for a work project or to attend to self-care. During those times, you must "hang out" the Do Not Disturb sign. Learning to establish those do not disturb times is not always easy but it is one of the most important things you can ever do for your own happiness and success.
You shouldn't fear complacency, especially if it prevents you from experiencing the satisfaction and calm that prior achievements should give you. Beware of being compulsively driven to achieve ever more and more. Get off of the treadmill and instead embrace complacency when its appropriate.
No matter how ingrained a habit is, no matter how well you have prepared, no matter how small the step is you're taking, sometimes it's just hard. Today we talk about how that's okay and how to deal with the feeling of difficulty when it inevitably arises.
Whether you perceive an experience as pleasurable or miserable is highly dependent on your perspective of what's going on. In this week's episode we discuss how to recognize when you are caught up in a changeable situation and how to go about doing so. With practice, it can dramatically change your life for the better.
Without the skills to deal with intense emotions it's not realistic to "just let it go." in fact, trying to just suppress your distress can lead to long-term problems and telling someone else to "just let it go" is just plain dismissive of that person's experience.
This week discuss better ways to deal with emotional distress and how to build up your skills to effectively deal with it.
This week we discuss both why it's important to start your effort to improve without delay and to start every day on a positive note. Morning routines set you up for a better day and delaying the start of anything just undermines success. Seize the day, seize the morning.
Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) is an evidence based, scientific approach to the the practice of mindfulness. Now nearly 40 years old, MBSR is used by many hospitals, corporations, sports teams, and the military to manage stress, increase focus, and improve lives and performance. Benefits can begin immediately and accrue as practice continues.
Comparing yourself to others, or your older self to your younger self, is a one way ticket to being miserable. Learn to focus on being the best you that you can be at any given moment and rediscover the joy of learning and daily improvement you had as a young child. It may not be easy but it's well worth the effort.
Your head is full of stories and thoughts that shape your life, some for good, some not so much. In any case, these thoughts are not always true. Learn how to examine your thoughts and, if they don't serve your greater purpose and happiness, change them.
Transform your relationships by focusing on and rewarding good behavior and ignoring annoying or negative actions. It takes practice to make it a habit and is well for the effort. We guarantee it will improve your life.
There are few things you can do that will improve your overall health more than eating more vegetables. Yet, many folks find them unpalatable and hard to consume.
In this episode we discuss the mindset and methodologies that can help you eat a greater volume and variety of these super-foods.
In this episode we explore the profound freedom than can be found in learning to say no; no to requests, no to tasks, and no to seeming obligations. By training yourself to make an authentic choice you'll be happier, reduce stress, and improve your relationships..
In this episode we discuss the relationship between quality sleep and managing stress. Poor sleep and poor stress management can create a vicious cycle thats hard to break. This week we explore various ways to improve both.
Being happier is sometimes just a matter of taking the time to simply notice how your day is going.There are likely many happy moments occurring throughout your day and you can teach yourself to notice them.
In this episode we explore how to use two specific questions to gain a better appreciation of the happiness and wonder thats probably already occurring in your life.
When discussing an emotional event or topic its best to let your partner know if you want them to Listen, Agree, or Advise. To often we jump in with advice when our partner just wants to be heard.
In todays episode we explore this sometimes nuanced technique for helping your partner process difficult experiences.
No matter how small the step, doing something to improve is better than nothing. Adding one green bean to your dinner or taking a two minute walk may seem silly, but it is a step in the right direction, and far, far better than doing nothing.
In this episode we talk about how doing something, anything, can improve your health, reduce your stress, and enhance your relationships.
When somebody asks, "Gotta minute?" you know that its going to take far longer. If not managed well, you're either going to contribute to your own stress by wasting valuable time, or you're going to cause issues for someone who really needs you to listen to them. Knowing how to decide what to do, in the moment, is one of the best things you can learn to do to manage stress and build better relationships.
Patience is required when working on any kind of life transformation with a "one step at a time" approach. Today we discuss just how important patience is and how you can improve yours. Just one thing is not a quick fix. It's a new foundation, not a fresh coat of paint.
And, just as you can't retire after contributing to your 401K for just a few months, so too you can't transform your life over night. Moreover, patience can be improved. By working to improve your patience with slow and steady progress, you better assure your success.
Exercise snacks are small amounts of movement that you can easily weave into virtually any part of your day. From taking the stairs instead of the elevator, to dancing while commercials are playing on TV, to parking at the end of the parking lot, exercise snacks can have a profoundly positive impact on your overall health.
In this episode we discuss how exercise snacks can either augment your regular training program of provide the bulk of your daily movement needs. This is the first of our episodes focused on Health and Fitness.
Manage your stress by taking advantage of the soothing power of forests and nature. In this episode we talk about our personal experiences with the healing power of nature and explore a little bit of the growing body of science that demonstrates the amazing healing properties of forests. Even if you're a city dweller, there are aspects of forest bathing that are available to you.
This is our first episode talking about stress management which we are thematically labeling, "When Life is not a Beach."
Listening better is at the core of building healthy relationships. Healthy relationships lead to better health, better stress management, and a happier life. Today we talk about how to become a better listener by focusing on the person you're with, learning to avoid distractions, and listening objectively without the filters and stories we often bring to a conversation.
This is our first episode looking at how to build healthier relationships, which we thematically label, "Just You and Me Babe."
In this episode we discuss how to find the inner voice that will help guide the decisions that will make you happier, both now and in the future. This is our first episode that deals with the topic of becoming Happier.
In this episode we explain what "Just One Thing" is all about, why we wanted to create this Podcast, and why we feel qualified to share this information.