In our 165th ever Rum Doings, we're back on the ocean waves! The topic is: why can't kings just reign until they die, for goodness sake?

After three days at sea, Nick and John find themselves trapped on a floating town with the most awful population on Earth. We begin with a look through the HMS Sinksalot's onboard programme, the Pitter Patter.

There's discussion of the world's most passive-aggressive magician, when John interviewed Douglas Adams, and incredibly, Nick's phone rings in the middle of the sea.