Beyond Black and White Talk: Recent Episodes
Christelyn Karazin
The site dedicated to black women interested and/or involved in interracial dating and the men who love them.
http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/
Visit the blog: http://www.BeyondBlackWhite.com More on Matthew Hussey: www.GetTheGuy.co.uk/bbw Buy "Swirling": http://amzn.to/1iKg5Ie Online Dating: http://www.InterracialDatingCentral.com Lorimar Winery: http://www.lorimarwinery.com Maze and Lee Channel: https://www.youtube.com/user/livinamaze
I'm fed up with this man. He's been bullying for years and inciting hatred and violence towards me. I want to put it on record, just in case. Here's the article I refer to: http://dreamandhustle.com/2014/03/the-black-woman-guide-to-dealing-with-radicalized-black-men-hating-black-women-online/
Visit the blog! http://www.BeyondBlackWhite.com Ready to start dating different? http://www.InterracialDatingCentral.com Buy the book, you know you want to! "Swirling" http://amzn.to/1V1c0uK
Information about black women/white men finances: http://www.businessinsider.com/this-is-the-highest-earning-type-of-interracial-couple-2012-2
Information about intermarriage Statistics: (CORRECTION: Black men intermarry at 25%. That's a FULL QUARTER of black men intermarrying: http://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2015/06/12/interracial-marriage-who-is-marrying-out/
Who's Interracial Marriage Lasts: http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.1741-3729.2008.00491.x/full
Find out how to get your guy with Matthew Hussey: http://www.GetTheGuy.co.uk/bbw Visit the blog! http://www.BeyondBlackWhite.com Check out my book, "Swirling!" http://amzn.to/1OwMgED
THE QUESTION:
Hey Christelyn,
My middle name is Rob, you may use that on air if you wish to create a video about this email.
I recently found your YouTube web videos and have been watching them steadily to gain insight into the world of interracial dating. I have never dated a black woman, but I would certainly like to. One of the reasons that I have yet to date outside my "race* " is that I live in northern Minnesota and unlike the rest of the country, the demographics of my hometown still overwhelming Caucasian. I plan on moving away when I finish up my degree in IT, so I don't think finding black women will be much of a problem wherever I end up.
What I do think may present an obstacle and the reason I am writing to you, is that I am an Atheist. Now I don't want to get into the nuances of religion or philosophy; suffice it to say I am open to religion, but I have yet to be convinced of one. However, from the research I have been doing on the Web it seems that all things being equal, black women tend to be some of the more religious individuals throughout the country.
How do you think that I should approach this subject while dating? I am not opposed to talking about religion, quite the contrary, as I love having debates with my friends some of whom are much more religious than I am. I am mostly concerned with not wanting to scare black women off or prematurely ending an otherwise pleasant conversation with one by using the "A-word." I realize that through years hearing misinformation about my subculture, very religious individuals can have detrimental preconceived notions about my beliefs or lack thereof, and become immediately defensive when someone challenges their faith, even with self-labels. Do you think I should bring up the issue of religion at all? What should I do if they bring up the issue? I know that this is a very sensitive issue for many people, and I would appreciate any insights you may offer.
Thank you for all the work you do both on YouTube and the blog. You are a very intelligent, well spoken, and attractive woman, and I look forward to viewing more of your work in the future. Your husband is a very lucky man.
Best wishes to you and yours,
Rob
*(an unfortunate construct of the 19th century that disregards the fact we are all human and ultimately originate in Africa)
CHECK OUT THE BLOG! http://www.BeyondBlackWhite.com READY TO GET THE GUY OF YOUR DREAMS? http://www.GetTheGuy.co.uk/bbw
Shy to? Check out Matthew Hussey's "Get the Guy" video coaching series http://www.GetTheGuy.co.uk/bbw
Visit the blog: http://www.BeyondBlackWhite.com The letters: Dear Christelyn, My name is Aaron Wade and I am a 21 year old college student. About a week ago a co-worker, J, introduced my to her cousin, M, who is black, and J said that M and I should go out. Well at first I thought that J was joking, but now I am not so sure. While I was checking M out, who I am very attracted to by the way, I noticed she was looking at me smiling and waving so I smiled and waved back. As the work night continued J told me a few things about M, like she is shy, and seemed to be encouraging me to ask M out; which I did not do that night because to opportunity never presented itself to me (if it did I could not tell). Two days later, when J worked again, I ask J if M was with her today, unfortunately she had went home. However, J told me that she would bring M by on Friday to see me. J did bring M by to see my on Friday but it was busy, I work in a restaurant, so I did not get a chance to talk to M. When J and M first walked up to me J said, "Aaron, guess who I brought." M kinda of smiled but did not really say anything. So my question is, does she like me? I can never tell if a girl likes me. I have never asked a girl out or been on a date because I am very shy and cannot tell if a girl likes me and is flirting with me. If she does like me, how do I ask her out? If she does say yes what should we do? (M is 19 so I cannot take her to a bar, or ask her if she would like to have a drink with me.) I know that this may seem like a lot of questions but I have never done anything like this before. Any help would be appreciated. And from the young woman...
Hi admin am "A" from SA but would love to remain anonymous or you can use any name to replace mine, I admire your work and page before I knew about this page I used to think I was not normal or I was an outcast because I have always loved white men period since I was pre-school till now, I have dated 2 white guys before and things never worked out because their families and friends did not approve, that still has not stopped how I love vanilla guys so I have a situation now there's a guy from work who I love madly but he doesn't know am not even sure if he notices me or if he does like black girls, I can't stop thinking of him, missing him when he is not at work, bam tired of dying inside am tired of acting like I don't notice him, now I have a challenge am too shy to approach him and his best friend is my supervisor , now I would like to ask my supervisor if his friend is single married or committed because I have never seen a ring on his finger, if he is married or taken I will burry my feelings but if he is single I want to ask my supervisor to let him know how I feel about him, am not so brave to face him and am not sure if I can face his rejection in ky face if he does reject me, so I need advice from you and the readers how to best approach this matter and how to let him know how I feel, because I can't carryon bottling up inside I need advice, have a lovely day thank you!
Link to the article I referenced: http://www.damemagazine.com/2015/08/24/are-black-mothers-beating-their-sons-misogyny
Link to my thought piece: http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/sisters-time-stop-giving-birth-men-hate/
It's a start, but is it finished? Weigh in! visit the blog: http://www.BeyondBlackWhite.com
A question from a medical Student
Matthew Hussey's "Get The Guy': http://www.GetTheGuy.co.uk/bbw "Get the Guy" Book: http://amzn.to/1JlGfMH Check out my book, "Swirling": http://amzn.to/1JlGmYD Visit the Blog: http://www.BeyondBlackWhite.com
Guy writes befuddled that his girlfriend's African family expects him to pay a dowry in order to marry her.
Check out the blog! http://www.BeyondBlackWhite.com Read the book! http://amzn.to/1MrEiim Interested in dating African women? http://www.InterracialDatingCentral.com
There's been a lot of talk about my position on the upcoming movie, "Straight Outta Compton." I'll read off some of the worst reasons people gave to defend this mess.
Join the conversation : http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/why-no-self-respecting-black-woman-should-pay-to-see-straight-out-of-compton/ Listen to my LIVE Google Hangout on this topic TONIGHT, JULY 31; 7PM PST
Visit the blog! http://www.BeyondBlackWhite.com Get Your Guy: http://www.GetTheGuy.co.uk/bbw Follow the Nulls: https://www.youtube.com/user/thenivenulls Buy My Book, "Swirling: http://amzn.to/1KsQj3E
This video is about 15,000 Subs! Thank You!! Visit the blog! http://www.BeyondBlackWhite.com Get Your Guy: http://www.GetTheGuy.co.uk/bbw Buy My Book, "Swirling: http://amzn.to/1KsQj3E
Want to know if he's into you? Check out the series from Matthew Hussey: http://www.GetTheGuy.co.uk/bbw
QOTW 40 and ready to mingle in Miami
Letter
Hello Christelyn Karazi, I am a 40 year old single mom ready to mingle ( son went to college ). I have not dated in years ( literally at least 8 years!!!) I ran across your blog and youtube. I am sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo happy you have not gone away. I need HELP. I live in Miami and am soooooooooooooooooo scared to attempt to date outside my "race". (not sure is that was proper term but)-- again I am soooo glad you are not gone. Do you have any recommended youtube advice already posted. I am sssssooooooooo tired of worried about what my family will say!!! I am 40!! As I look at other interracial relationships thriving and happy I think to myself....what in the hell am I waiting for? Well truth is im scared as hell and don't know where to begin. I love your blog!!! (is it called a blog? -- well I love what you do!!) Kudos to you!! Respectfully ...
Here's the letter: "My name is Erica I am 23 and my boyfriend's name is Ryan who is 24. We are both finishing up college as a nursing student and him as a petroleum engineer. We have been together for 2 years and 1 month now. We are going through extremely lows with our families, especially mine. My fathers is completely against me dating a Caucasian man. (My father was born back in the time of segregating and riots. He is a black panther). My father met him once and never tried to really get to know him. Ryan has longed to just have a chance to talk and get to know my dad. I never thought it was an issue to consider dating outside my race. We live in a pretty mixed area. My 2 brothers are also married with different ethnicity (Filipino and Hispanic). Long story short, my father disgrace me every time he knows I am with him. On fourth of July, I went to Ryan's house to study for nursing school. My father checked on me and I panicked. My family doesn't let Ryan come over so I have to sacrifice seeing him sometimes. I feel bad for lying of course, but I can't do what makes me happy. I please my parents a lot more than I do for myself. This one time that I find pure happiness, they go against it completely. I love Ryan with every ounce of me. It has been extremely hard being in my first interracial relationship. I do not regret meeting him because he has brought such joy in my life. My parents tend to stress me out more than anyone. I am a nursing student and I have a lot of pressure on me. I have always been pressured by my parents with school. Of course we aren't very expressive because my parents see one way. So it is hard for me to express how I feel with them. My questions is, what should I do? I do not want to say goodbye to Ryan, but how do I stand against this? This has been heavy on my heart and I feel like it is all too much. I just want to be happy with peace. My parents tend to do that opposite of support me. What should I do? Any advice would help us both. Thank you for your time!"
One girl wrote me, worried sick that her and her rainbeau won't be able to handle the social pressure when they go to the South for a family wedding. Check out what I told her.
Buy Christelyn's book, "Swirling" http://amzn.to/1GXGyfA
A race hustler used commentary I made on how interracial couples can communicate their feelings about racially-fueled tragedies without minimizing them or dismissing them. Instead of listening to the content of the video, this person used it as an opportunity to call me vile names and proceed to compare me to "Aunt Jemima" because I wore an Afrocentric headband. He then send legions of hateful black men and women who called me a BED WENCH, BITCH, C*NT, and even suggested I be shot. Yeah. Real mature, huh? Here's my response.
time to discuss the recent shooting in charleston, how to handle it in your IR relationship and why you should be very careful to blame a race for the actions of one
Visit the blog! http://www.BeyondBlackWhite.com Check out Matthew Hussey: http://www.GetTheGuy.co.uk/bbw Buy Christelyn's book, "Swirling" http://amzn.to/1GXGyfA
Visit the blog: http://www.BeyondBlackWhite.com Buy the book, "Swirling" http://amzn.to/1GXGyfA
More on Matthew Hussey: http://www.GettheGuy.co.uk/bbw Visit the blog: http://www.BeyondBlackWhite.com
Critically thinking black women are starting to ask the right questions about their shabby treatment. It's about time!!
Video response to this mess here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IWpRCe3AZaU More discussion on the blog: BeyondBlackWhite.com
26-year-old guy write me about how to navigate a very uncomfortable situation during his first date with a black woman.
Who Gets More Flack for IR Dating? BM or BW? Join us Friday at 7PM PST for our Google hangout
Check out the blog! http://www.BeyondBlackWhite.com Click here to learn more about how to get the guy you really want, no matter what the race http://www.GetTheGuy.co.uk/bbw
Hispanic Man Asks How to Approach Black Women visit the blog! http://www.BeyondBlackWhite.com
Brought in heavy reinforcements on this! Here's the question: "I'm 16 years old and I've never even had a boyfriend before, sometimes I am content, but most of the time I am very lonely, the thing is, is that I have always been attracted to boys of other races, I have never been attracted to black boys before. I feel like there is something wrong with me. I also feel like I am not good enough for boys of other races, as if they look at me and say "ew, look at that black girl." and I am the excact opposite of the "ghetto" stereotype. Recently I admitted my feelings to my crush (who is chinese) and I asked if we could hang out to which he declined (because he is "too lazy") and I can't help but wonder if it is because I am black, I mean, We have each others numbers and we are friends on facebook. I just kind of feel confused...Will I ever find someone who likes me for me?? "
Link to original post: http://www.xojane.com/it-happened-to-me/interracial-relationship Come to the blog and further discuss! http://www.BeyondBlackWhite.com
Video response to this note: "CK I have a video request I like for you to talk about. I been crying because I am soo deeply hurt by this issue. This topic has been bothering me along with other black women. Well here it goes....Yesterday I went out to the movies and dinner with my boo (white man I been seeing for a few months) and these black men were making comments about my hair talking about I'm trying to straighten my hair like a white woman and calling me a Negro bedwench. My date (white guy) jumped to my defense and said "You can not speak about black women trying to look like white women when there are white women out here walking around with fake butts and fake boobs trying to look like black women." The weird part about this situation was that the black man was with a white woman and she had a fake butt and fake boobs. My date and I left after we were finished with our dinner. On our way driving home my date could tell i was still bothered by the black man comments about my hair. I know I should be natural and I usually am natural but I decided to wear my hair straight whats the big deal? I wanted to switch up my hair do. I think women have that right to wear their hair as they choose. My date asked me this question...." Why do black men criticize black women for wearing straight hair accusing them of looking like a white woman but black men love white women with black women features like big butts and big boobs. Why are white women with black women features considered sexy but black women with white women features is considered ugly. For example Kim kardashian, Iggy, Nicole Austin all have fake big asses but black men love them and worship their fake asses. Gabrielle Union, Rapper Eve, Serena Williams all wear weaves and straight hair but black men hate them and claim they are copying white women calling them hairhats but black men don't think white girls with fake asses are trying to look like black women. Please stare your thoughts on this. Is this hypocrisy and contradiction or what?"
Link to original article: http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/kanyes-comments-amber-rose-highlights-white-women-always-virtuous-no-matter-skeezy-past/
Sigh...yet another black women feels the need to apologize and self-reflect on why she prefers dating white men. We're going to discuss and get down to why some of us STILL feel the need to explain themselves. Want to be on the show? Email me! Christelyn@BeyondBlackWhite.com
This video is about Black Women Apologize for Preferences Friday live hangout 7PM PST on youtube. Search for christelyn karazin.
Come join us today as we introduce the dashing Wes Murphy to 5 pretty woman and do some matchmaking.
Check out the blog! http://www.BeyondBlackWhite.com Research references: IR Marriage approval: http://www.gallup.com/poll/163697/approve-marriage-blacks-whites.aspx Men and Women's Age Preferences: http://news.nationalpost.com/2014/09/12/dataclysm-the-data-guru-for-a-popular-dating-site-explains-what-men-and-women-want-from-a-mate/#__federated=1 Info About BB&W Las Vegas Trip: http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/bbw-goes-vegas-2015/
Recent events on our Fan page has me calling fowl on the value system of some of the women who participate. Do looks trump a strong character? If you say "yes" no wonder you're angry and alone!
Join me tonight to chat about how we parents of biracial and minority children can help them through bouts of bullying and racism
The question: "Here is my question for you and your readers. I am a 22 black female from the suburbs of New York who just graduated college and it working full time in the IT field. I have been trying to find a serious relationship for the past few years with white men but all of them have gotten to the point of no where. I have tried online dating like pof and even match.com but most of the guys have all wanted to have one night stands or a friends with benefits even though it clearly stated on their profile they were looking for a relationships. I am often told that I should just have “fun” and not think of having a monogamous relationship. I was not raised that way. I was always told that if he’s not willing to make you his gf then why even bother sharing your body with a man who doesn't see your worth. Due to my constant failure, I’m beginning to wonder if I should plan to leave NY or maybe there’s something wrong with me. I do not present myself in sexual manner to these men but they all seem to just go straight to sex regardless. What I am wondering if to any of your reader who are men and women in NY, how do they and where do they go to potentially meet someone?"
Want to participate in the positive meme generation? Find out how here: http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/take-haters-bbw-circle-support-action-wronged-ir-couple/
Come join me for the hear the "WTF" sound bites from the Jesse Peterson show I was on earlier this week. Special guest, Colin Flaherty.
Take a look at my recollection of what has got to be the worst interview EVER! If you'd like to contact the "reverend" Jesse Peterson, here's his deets.
BOND T: 1-323-782-1980 F: 1-323-782-0122 www.bondinfo.org support@bondinfo.org
Went skiing this weekend and the place was FULL of awesome and available men of all spectrums, but mostly white and Asian. Yummy. Here's what I learned.
Stumped how you can get the courage to make the first move? Want to learn how femininity takes you far? Look here!
Don't forget to visit the blog: http://www.BeyondBlackWhite.com, and the ONLY forum for black women in interracial relationships, and the men who love them, http://www.BeyondBlackWhiteForums.com
Live chat with guests on topics. Visit the blog, http://www.BeyondBlackWhite.com and the forum, http://www.BeyondBlackWhiteForums.com
A question I often get..."Is it okay to develop a preference from someone of a difference race? Why do black women feel so guilty about stating their preferences? Can these natural inclinations change over time? Check out the podcast: http://beyondblackandwhite.podomatic.com/ Visit the blog: http://www.BeyondBlackWhite.com
Streamed live on 19 Dec 2014
Join our private G+ group here: https://plus.google.com/u/0/communiti... Check out our forum here: http://www.BeyondBlackWhiteForums.com And the blog: http://www.BeyondBlackWhite.com
How important is it to you to see IR couples like ours on television, and for the black women here: are you moved at all by the guilt tactics about producing children with non-black men who won't be phenotypically looking "black men?"
Visit the blog: http://www.BeyondBlackWhite.com Join our forum! http://www.BeyondBlackWhite.com
"Get the Guy" relationship expert, Matthew Hussey continues with his sage advice on how to...get the guy. "Get the Guy" relationship expert, Matthew Hussey and Beyond Black & White talk REAL strategies to make a connection with the guy you REALLY want. To hear more from Matthew about the male mind and how guys operate, check out his online home-study programme, The Man Myth:
Matthew Hussey answers a reader question about dealing with people who slight interracial couples
Matthew Hussey and "Swirling" co-author, Christelyn Karazin answer a common relationship conundrum
One Beyond Black & White reader asks Matthew why she always attracts men who are attached. Tune in to hear what Matt has to say about that! What more? "Get the Guy" relationship expert, Matthew Hussey and Beyond Black & White talk REAL strategies to make a connection with the guy you REALLY want. To hear more from Matthew about the male mind and how guys operate, check out his online home-study programme, The Man Myth: http://www.gettheguy.co.uk/bbw
Took a look and listen to this informative (and at times, hilarious) interview with relationships expert, Matthew Hussey. "Get the Guy" relationship expert, Matthew Hussey and Beyond Black & White talk REAL strategies to make a connection with the guy you REALLY want. To hear more from Matthew about the male mind and how guys operate, check out his online home-study programme, The Man Myth: http://www.gettheguy.co.uk/bbw
Matthew Hussey and I talk about the book, how to handle the disapproval of others, and how to find you own happiness. "Get the Guy" relationship expert, Matthew Hussey and Beyond Black & White talk REAL strategies to make a connection with the guy you REALLY want. To hear more from Matthew about the male mind and how guys operate, check out his online home-study programme, The Man Myth: http://www.gettheguy.co.uk/bbw
Relationship expert, Matthew Hussey continues with Beyond Black & White to discuss what creates sexiness and mystery in a person. "Get the Guy" relationship expert, Matthew Hussey and Beyond Black & White talk REAL strategies to make a connection with the guy you REALLY want. To hear more from Matthew about the male mind and how guys operate, check out his online home-study programme, The Man Myth: http://www.gettheguy.co.uk/bbw
"Get the Guy" relationship expert, Matthew Hussey and Beyond Black & White talk REAL strategies to make a connection with the guy you REALLY want. To hear more from Matthew about the male mind and how guys operate, check out his online home-study programme, The Man Myth: http://www.gettheguy.co.uk/bbw
More good stuff from "Get the Guy" relationship expert, Matthew Hussey. "Get the Guy" relationship expert, Matthew Hussey and Beyond Black & White talk REAL strategies to make a connection with the guy you REALLY want. To hear more from Matthew about the male mind and how guys operate, check out his online home-study programme, The Man Myth: http://www.gettheguy.co.uk/bbw
Pick up a copy of "Swirling" and get Matthew's program FREE! http://www.amazon.com/Swirling-Relate... Relationships expert, Matthew Hussey and blogger and co-author of "Swirling" discuss reader relationships questions. For the special offer mentioned in the video, buy a copy of "Swirling" and then sign up for Matthew's "The Man Myth" at www.GetTheGuy.co.uk/swirling.
Visit the blog! http://www.BeyondBlackWhite.com We did this interview with Josh and Melissa in New York. Josh admits he has a preference.
This video is about White Guys, Stop Saying You Like Black Women Because They're "Strong!!"
Don't fall for this manipulation tactic. It's all game. Visit the blog! http://www.BeyondBlackWhite.com
I just found out my half-sister is dying of liver cancer, related to a lifetime of food addiction. This needs to STOP!
The question: "Hi this is probably the first time I've reached out to anyone about the issue i have. I'm a 32 yr old white male and I for the first time dated a dark skinned black woman. I fell madly in love with her. I would do anything for her. But the thing of the matter is she had been in several bad relationships and the one that did the most damage was the relationship with the father of her child. At this time there is a 5 yr age difference. My concern is every time we talk we always end up talking about the future between us. We also more and more talk about things we want to open up about. She tells me shes timid shy about letting me in on certain aspects on how she is. We've been talking again and known each other for 4 yrs. I still love her to this day with from the bottom of my heart. I know being friends is what she wants but feeling as i do it makes it difficult for me and how I feel. Ive expressed how I feel about her and she tries to express how she feel. As a recent unfolding event (mind you she has told me that she didn't want to date anyone because she wanted to find out who she was and focus on her career and her child). She tells me a man that she works with she is going to give a chance with and after some very difficult and slightly heated conversations she was able to admit to me that ( being it difficult she didn't not want not to hurt me caring for me so much). But also admitting (he himself is white) that she feels comfortable around him because he acts black. Also saying he makes her laugh more. But wants to be around her 24/7 and she tells me she sees somethings in him he might end up doing that would piss her off. What do I do? I've tried so hard to deal with this but emotion comes into play with me a lot. She opened my eyes to a lot of true emotions I have now. I don't wanna lose her out of my life but i want her happy. As of recent she tells me she doesn't know what she wants and she says shes just getting distracted by this guy. Because shes showing her everything she wants and its easy and convenient. I told her i had to take myself out of the situation emotionally because it wasn't fair to me. I've had so much of me invested in her emotionally it hurts. I also should mention that when something bad happens with at person or some bad trait comes out in the person she sees that as a red flag and walks away. I think shes scared of being hurt by someone that is wearing a mask and when she gets comfortable will take that mask off and hurt her emotionally or physically. I've met several white men that act like this guy shes (having a feeling out phase with right now). I've warned her that most of all change and end up being very controlling and wont let go. But I do know if he knew that she was still talking to me he would get angry and most likely very mean to her. Which is what im scared for with her.
So what I'm asking is. 1. Is all lost with her and I. ( mind you she does not wanna lose me out of her life and cares for me so much that she doesn't wanna hurt me in anyway) 2. Is it that I don't act a certain way or have those mannerisms that I dont make her feel safe? 3. Is that if hes showing her to good to be true is it? 4. Should I keep hopes for her and I for the future in some way shape or form.
Knowing this is alot :-S being a first time email. I just wanna know your thoughts and how your think i should try to go about dealing with this situation. I would appreciate some advice if you had the time to talk with me or email me about this issue. Because i love this woman with all my heart.
Concerned Love :-\"