It Hits Different: Recent Episodes
E. Lew & Merisa
It Hits Different is a culture podcast featuring Merisa and Erica aka "The Lewises". By serendipity, these two former grad school roommates (who oddly shared the same last name) became soul sisters. Bonding over a shared love of travel, philosophical debates, spirituality, food, dance, and unpopular opinions, there is no telling where the conversation may go.
00:00 Introduction
0:50 “Bully” is defined and introduced as the topic of discussion and the ways and which someone can be defined as such.
2:42 Merisa and Erica discuss bullying from a familial perspective and how it can possibly break one’s relationship with their loved ones or community
5:20 As an adult, it’s important to not allow yourself to be bullied and taking your power back
5:55 Merisa and Erica discuss fake sincerity and “fun” shade that comes from a bad place
7:01 First Impressions and their how it may play a part in bullying also hazing newcomers into social groups.
9:22 Taking accountability for our bullying
10:09 Bullying in a relationship, does it exist?
10:50 Discussing the ways in which to discern between bullying and help by paying attention to tones and motives
12:18 Merisa and Erica discuss Kevin Samuel’s controversial statements made to a woman seeking counseling
15:00 This segment addresses the infamous rating game college guys play on women volunteers
16:24 Questioning people who pretend to be helpers and counselors but in fact, do not like people
17:33 Merisa and Erica discuss a mutual negative experience with a career counselor in the master’s program
20:42 Using the Real Housewives as an the case study, Merisa and Erica discuss “shade”
23:19 Revenge bullying, and when it may or may not be acceptable
26:38 Closing
Kevin Samuels link :https://youtu.be/VI6XWGKvUrE
This week Erica and Merisa discuss black conservatism with guest Curt Bender and Christian Williams.
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Boundaries
In this episode, Erica & Merisa discuss boundaries, the set of rules or expectations we place on ourselves to avoid compromising who we are. A boundary can look like not allowing certain people to know private matters, determining who can physically touch you, and simply saying “no.” Not to be confused with standards—qualities that must be present before a certain level of engagement—boundaries are very important when practicing self–love and shift depending on who we’re interacting with at any given moment.
0:49: Introducing the book that sparked the conversation, Boundaries by Cloud & Townsend
1:32: Merisa and Erica discuss their Boundaries Quiz scores and some of the questions
3:02 Merisa explains her boundaries, or standards rather, regarding the topic of weight
5:15 Defining boundaries as rules created to avoid being used manipulated, used, or violated. Whereas. standards are requirements prior to connecting with someone.
6:51 Merisa and Erica discuss relationship boundaries, specifically concerning passwords and phones
08:34 Discussing whether people truly know if they are crossing a boundary with you and how to solve issues once crossed.
10:18 Erica discusses her struggles with unsolicited relationship advice from friends.
13:08 Merisa discusses people taking her kindness for weakness
14:15 Discussing how our boundaries says a lot about our life goals and aspirations.
18:02 The different ways we can tell if our boundaries are healthy, and how to avoid reactionary boundaries
21:35 Parental boundaries and how your role in people’s lives determine your boundaries for them and yourself
24:00 Personality shapes our boundaries and not feeling the need to make friends therapists
27: Stepparent boundaries & Outro
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Music by: Dystinkbeats.com
Rejection vs. Redirection
In this episode, Erica & Merisa discuss rejection and its consequences on how we think and react to our environment. Social and familial rejection has a profound effect on our mental health causing stress, depression, envy, and anxiety throughout our life if not confronted properly. By simply taking a more optimistic approach to rejection, such as looking at it as a redirection, we are able to move forward with our lives with more confidence & peace.
2:10: Defining rejection & redirection, per Oxford Dictionary
3:00: Discussing where rejection comes from & the evolutionary biology behind it
5:40 Determining if we’re being rejected versus being challenged; Also, understanding when quit especially if your goals are not purpose-driven
10:04 How men versus women handle rejection in romantic relationships & in their career
13:25 The negative effects of dwelling on past relationship trauma
18:40 Rejection from parents; the effects of divorces & having empathy and compassion for our parents
24:07 Cultural rejection and outcasting people based on their political views; cancel culture
28:00 Stop rejecting people who may have some ignorance but are trying to find common ground
32:35 Rejection in friendships, in particular, gift-giving
34:06 Setting friendship expectations, having self-awareness in friendship, & friendship audits
37:28 Discussing “ghosting” and the hypocrisy amongst people who do it but hate when it is done to them
38:54 Understanding that no one owes us anything and taking accountability for your self-esteem by not chasing people who are rejecting you
41:15 Being cautious of people who want to keep you in a rejected mindset & also understanding that rejection is often so painful that their anger can be projected onto the wrong person
46:33 Define yourself so you don’t absorb other people’s opinions or rejections
48:20 Takeaway on rejection and closing
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Music by: Dystinkbeats.com
This week E. Lew and Merisa catch up and talk about life during COVID-19. They cover everything from Trump checks to cancel culture.
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Music by: Dystinkbeats.com
Do you have wanderlust? Are you itching to get away from reality and go on a vacation?
In the final episode of Season One, Mer and E.Lew discuss one of their favorite bonding activities...Traveling! Both ladies provide their Travel Dos & Don'ts, their favorite places, and destinations soon to come! Take a listen as they dive into their lessons, tips, and memorable moments.
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There's a pandemic among us, and we're not talking about Coronavirus. Have you ever felt hopeless? Does joy seem to be missing from your life? Do you have a friend who you know is depressed, but you feel powerless to help them?
In this episode, E.Lew & Merisa discuss their experience and suggestions on how to overcome sadness we all may feel at a certain point in our lives. Seeing the bigger picture will take work, but anyone can do it. Let's heal!
If you want to express yourself or feel alone, you can always reach out to ithitsdifferent@gmail.com. -- completely anonymous.
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The entrepreneurial mindset is growing rapidly, and many young adults are opting to start their own business rather than securing a “stable” job. Side hustles are also growing in popularity with the rise of freelance websites and the power of social media’s marketing capabilities. However, there are challenges young entrepreneurs face despite their fearlessness such as student debt, barriers to entry, access to start-up capital or resources, and a fundamental lack of financial literacy.
In this episode, the Lewises discuss entrepreneurship with Latanya White—a business coach, college professor, author and entrepreneur. Professor White has made a career out of business coaching, stressing the importance of mindset, accountability, resilience, and challenging sources of self-doubt. She walks us through the following topics:
- Breaking free of familial expectations that do not align with one’s passion- 4:40
- Creating systems, structure and habits for people who are confident they want to start a business- 8:00
- The next step after a business idea fails & identity mapping- 11:03
- How to grow your money in college and responsible self-care- 17:15
- Work-life Balance for Entrepreneurs- 20:24
- The importance of valuing your products & services appropriately & fighting Imposter Syndrome- 23:05
- “Side Hustle of the Month” by Essence- 25:30
- Ideas on creating passive income by leveraging things you already know - 29:00
You can get more information about LaTanya on her website meetprofwhite.com.
Free guide to start your business! https://www.meetprofwhite.com/ithitsdifferent
Prof. LaTanya White's Facebook
https://www.facebook.com/MeetProfWhite/
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This week E. Lew & Merisa discuss the age old topic of self awareness and quickly find out how much of a burden it can be.
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Music by: Dystinkbeats.com
“To develop a complete mind: Study the science of art; Study the art of science.”
In this episode E. Lew & Merisa speak to Patrick Hunter aka Patcasso, one of the nation's leading live performance painters. Patcasso discusses his passion for bridging the gap between science & art through his many projects including STEAM (STEM +Art) and Ted Talks.
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Patcasso TED Talk: https://youtu.be/k4iZSur1CFQ
Patcasso IG: https://instagram.com/patcassoart?igshid=1esgkelr5k9m6
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Music by: Dystinkbeats.com
So good we had to make it two episodes! Sorry I Don't Speak Dutch: Part 2 is a continuation of the Lewises relationship conversation with special guest, EJ.
In this episode, Merisa, E.Lew & EJ continue discussing gender roles, "going dutch," and our conclusion on the Valentine's Day debate.
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Music by: Dystinkbeats.com
Are men suppose to get a gift on Valentines Day? Is it even necessary to celebrate? How have cultural norms changed the way we think about roles in relationships?
In this episode, Merisa and E.Lew invite a special guest, EJ, for his male perspective on Valentines Day gift-giving, gender roles in today's society, and why more and more people are opting to "go Dutch."
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Music by: Dystinkbeats.com
Friends! The family we get to choose. As one of the most ambiguous relationships you can have, friendships take many different forms. In this episode, Merisa & Erica will discuss friendship topics such as boundaries, totem poles, forgiveness and how to choose the best circle for your personality. And of course, the question we may ask ourselves until the end of time--Can women and men be friends?
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Music by: Dystinkbeats.com
Ah, Self Love. Popular phrase these days. How do you express self love? Are you still on the journey? What kind of behaviors, actions, & attitudes reflect the way you show appreciation to yourself? In this episode, E. Lew & Merisa explore our perspective on self love and how it affects us and our interactions with others. Take a long hard look in the mirror for this one guys.
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Music by: Dystinkbeats.com
Expectations! We all have them. But are they fair? Do your expectations align with the reality of your situation? Are you placing unrealistic expectations on others? In this episode, E. Lew & Merisa explore this very topic. Deciphering what’s premeditated resentments and what’s realistic isn’t always easy but it’s necessary to be your best self.
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Music by: Dystinkbeats.com
What’s up guys! Welcome to It Hits Different is a space where we will discuss culturally relevant topics, have transformative conversations, while welcoming diverse opinions that push our world forward. Join Us on January 23, 2020 for our season premiere.