Commitment Phobe: Recent Episodes
Tanai Milgram
When you really think about it, we commit to things all the time, so what is it that we’re really afraid of when it comes to relationships?
Listen in each week as Women's Coach and recovering “commitment phobe,” Tanai Milgram, shares the journey that led her to discover what really lay beneath her “commitment phobia” that made her run away from intimacy and vulnerability in relationships and how you, too, can start overcoming the fears that keep you from intimacy, help you foster self-love, and feel free to be your most authentic self.
If you want to be a guest on the show or have any questions about the podcast or coaching, E-mail Tanai at tanai.milgram@gmail.com
Ever think about how authentic is the way you breathe, walk, or sit?
What if some of those patterns or postures are ways you've learned to be to protect yourself or be accepted, but it's not actually what's true in the moment? And what if you could then change your life by simply changing your physical patterns and nourishing your nervous system? My guest Oren Shai comes on to the podcast for the second time to talk about how we can create more authentic relating and relationships by growing our awareness of the authenticity of our movements and postures.
-How we hold our body determines how we live our lives.
-How we've all been living in an envinronment that's akin to a "rock concert" and how that impacts of nervous system awareness.
-The power of slowing down and how it can help us feel more and rely less on stimulants.
-How responsible are we for feeling regulated in our relationships? -How can we learn to recognize when we're externalizing our sense safety so we can source that safety from within?
-Sensing vs. sensemaking.
-How sharing our feelings with others can be invitations for deepening intimacy.
-The power of taking pauses when we're relating with others.
This summer I took an incredible 5 day training called 'Fierce Love' led by John Wineland, a speaker and teacher I've been following for years that leads men and women in the practices of embodied masculine leadership, spiritual intimacy and sexual polarity. IT WAS AMAZING! I truly feel changed on a cellular level. This immersion taught me the power I have within myself to be in my heart in relationship with men through any experience, the beautiful, the sexy, and the difficult. Today I bring along Matt Bockenstette, a fellow participant and leader in the world of intimacy and relationships, to share with you what we both took away from our weekend and how we're applying our takeaways in our lives! I gurantee you will feel resonance in what has come up for Matt and I in our relationships with the opposite sex. We share practical tools you can use as you deepen the intimacy and love in your relationships with men and women! Matt Bockenstette is the Co-Founder of University Of Man, a global men’s community and revolutionary brotherhood leading men to open hearts, aligned purposes, and playful transformation through the “5 Pillars Of Masculinity.” He’s built and sold multiple business, lives a life of sobriety, and now calls Austin, TX home.
In this solo episode, I talk about how in the past, the fear of losing myself made opening my heart and leaning into intimacy seem impossible. Join me as I explore the delicate balance between being there for another and self-preservation, and how prioritizing our own needs is essential to feel safe when we're opening ourself to connection or to be there for someone else.
If you've been working on your avoidant tendencies in your relationships like me, you might be probably familiar with feeling like you're going to "lose yourself" in a relationship when people need you, or when you percieve that they need you. Tune in for some practical tips on what to do to help you come back to your heart and connection when you're triggered and want to run away.
Holy shh!! What a powerful episode! This week I interviewed Rachel Butts, a powerhouse, beautiful, radiant woman who has been a client of mine the past 3 years. Rachel, a former pastor's wife, bravely transformed her life from one of unhappiness and suppression to one of empowerment and authenticity. She opens up about her journey to reclaim her voice, independence, and true self after years of living in a way that wasn't aligned with her inner truth in order to please everyone else.
Join us as we explore:
- The personal cost of living to please others and the harm it does to our spirit.
- The sneaky ways she was using vulnerability to get away with hiding her truth
- The freedom and empowerment that became available when she stopped calling herself a victim
- The dangers of a "right" vs. "wrong" mentality and how it traps us in unhealthy situations.
- The futility of changing ourselves to fit others' expectations and the freedom in embracing who we truly are.
- The often untold reality that healing can cause life to fall apart before it gets better, and why this process, though challenging, is ultimately what leads us to our deepest joy and alignment.
- The importance of trust and self-compassion when you leave behind a life of certainty and follow your heart/
Rachel's story is a testament to the strength it takes to break free from societal and relational expectations and the beauty that comes from living authentically, even when that journey is initially painful and we don't know where it's taking us. Whether you're struggling to find your voice, trapped in a situation that doesn't serve you, or simply in need of inspiration, this episode is a must-listen. Tune in and discover the transformative power of authenticity. 🌟
#PodcastEpisode #Authenticity #PersonalTransformation #SelfEmpowerment #HealingJourney #SelfCompassion #BreakingFree
Hoy en dia se habla mucho de las energias masculina y femenina que llevamos adentro, y como crear polaridad sexual con el otro atravez de la encarnacion de estas energias. Pero la verdad es que dentro de cada uno de nosotros estas energias no viven separadas, interactuan y son una pareja en si, un matrimonio. Hoy hablo con mi profe de Tarot Clara Maria Abad para hablar de como el tarot nos enseña de estas polaridades de energia femenina y masculina, luz y oscuridad, emocion y mente, que viven dentro de nosotros, y como nos ayuda a traer mas consciencia y profundidad en en mundo vincular.
In this deeply moving episode, join us on an intimate journey with the resilient and inspiring Luis Molinar as he shares his story from being depressed and suicidal to finding his purpose and living a heart-led life. Luis found himself getting seperated from a long-time partner, burned out, struggling emotionally until he hit a rock bottom that forced him to face his inner demons, unfelt emotions and lack of self-love. "Life is about getting back on the horse."- Luis Tune in to listen to how Luis rose from the depths of hitting rock bottom to embrace a life filled with faith and an open heart. Luis opens up about the challenges that tested his spirit and the transformative moments that led him to a path of profound positivity.
"It's ok to experience sadness and pain but we also have the choice of stepping out of that. It's there, we want to experience it, learn from it, but we don't want it to become part of our personality."
Topics we share: -How burning out helps us align ourselves with our truth and let go of what's out of alignment. -How listening to your body helps you align with your truth.-How death helps create a sense of urgency to live out a life of purpose. -Life is about "choosing your hard." -How we meet the universe halfway by taking action towards our dreams and allowing the universe to show us the way. -What happens when we move from doing things by obligation to do them out of desire.
Ever feel like even when you're surrounded by people, you feel alone, or like your conversations are so shallow they end up draining you? My guest Ryel Kestano is the co-founder of an organization I have been involved with in the past two years and DEEPLY impacted by called ART-Authentic Relating Training. At its simplest, authentic relating is a groundbreaking relational practice that creates profoundly enriching, enlivening, and nourishing relationships in all social domains of life, from the bedroom to the boardroom, with intimate partners and perfect strangers and everyone in between. For me, it's been a gamechanger in how raw and authentic I let myself show up in my interactions on dates, with friends and with my parents. Ryel comes on to share why he devoted himself to this work and how it can impact the level of depth and intimacy you can experience in your relationships, from closed ones to strangers to even people you're in conflict with.
"Authentic relating has been called relational meditation, where the object of our meditational presence is relational space itself, which really brings us into presence, and presence, really being in the here and now, is where we experience connection, the deepest sense of being seen, seeing another, and partly the reason why that is, is because when we're really committed to the here and now we can't rely on programs and conditioning that we so often lean on as a crutch in our conversations." Ryel is now offering an online 4 week course called "The Art of Authentic Dating." Shoot him a message on IG to get more info! https://www.instagram.com/ryelkestano/
An update episode on recent breakthroughs in my dating and how I navigated a situation where I really liked the guy but we weren't looking for the same things.
We've all been there...you like this person but you're not looking for the same things. Sometimes you disregard that and enjoy connecting with them. Sometimes you hope things will change...sometimes, they do! Most of the time they don't, but you learn something anyway. On this episode I talk about how to honor yourself and your truth while accepting the other's truth.
Most people think of kink and they imagine scary, extreme, torture-filled, sexual interactions. I wanted to bring someone on to talk about the love and medicine that can actually be present in kink and how it's way less intimidating than most people imagine...because it's actually be a really playful, transformative journey with the right people, setting and structure! My guest Yossef Sagi, a Sex and Magick Educator, had the same negative connotations to kink and couldn't possibly imagine it resonating with him. Until an experience made him realize that it wasn't only powerful, it was a modality that he could use to combine all of his skills and passions and faciliate deep healing and shadow work. Yossef comes on to give us the 101 on conscious kink and the many ways he infuses it into his coaching practice to help people heal from trauma, express lost and repressed parts of themselves, love themselves more, and deepen intimacy in relationships. Tune in to get all your basic questions answered about kink and what it means to engage in kink in a conscious way! We cover: power dynamics,objectification, pain, taboo and how Yossef uses each one for specific people's needs in what they want to heal or experience.
Other things we talk about: -Whether you should hire a proffesional dom -The importance of consent and how it creates safety and freedom -The difference between roles in kink -How kink scenes create a metaphor for life -Lots of tips if you want to start diving into kink!
Geraldine and Mike met only for a few days before Mike went off to live in a monastery for 6 months acorss the country. It was like the universe was playing a game on them as they had a deep connection right before being apart for half of a year, and they decided to play.
I brought these wonderful humans on to talk about what helped them thrive through long distance and general practical and spiritual practices that help them foster the deep intimacy and connection they share today.
Some topics we cover: -A play-by-play of how they met and how their relationship evolved through and post long distance. -What it looks like for them to be totally themselves and in acceptance of the other. -How they welcome what arises between them and create a safe space for their emotions. -What it means to meet someone like a stranger every day and how that helps their connection. -What it looks like for them to play on the same team. -What they've each learned about themselves through their relationship. This episode will leave you feeling like your heart is bursting with love :) To connect with Geraldine and Mike find them here: Mike: https://www.instagram.com/mike_alicea/ Geraldine: https://www.instagram.com/geraldinez.amor/
Geraldine is a Somatic Sex Coach that helps women deepen their experience of profound intimacy and pleasure.
"Masculinity is not toxic, masculinity is medicine." Behind many of the challenges men and women have in relating, is the judgment and rejection they have towards the opposite gender. My guest Mikaal Bates is a men's coach who's dedicated to accelerating the conscious evolution of men and masculiity across the planet in our lifetime, and to heal the divine between men and women.
On this episode Mikaal comes on to talk about how we need to start celebrating and pursuing healthy masculinity, and end the internal and external battle between men and women to have deeper, more loving and connected relationships between humans, communities and nations. Tune in to be inspired by Mikaal's passion about the brillance and shadows of men that he believes is the key of bettering not just men, but women too! To connect with Mikaal you can check out with podcast The ReMasculation Podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/1xjEKsfxJvLnvXShooTYco?si=d7d93314c1464487
His Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mikaal_bates/
My guest today Caitlin Lili helps women & couples communicate vulnerably so they can experience deeper connection and hotter sex.
Today we talk about: -Oftenttimes what gets in the way for a woman to be available for love with a man, is her hatred towards men. -Caitlin's journey transforming her disruptive communication style in relationships and how that drastically changed her dating patterns and the men she was attracting. -How to communicate your needs and desires from a place that fosters connection vs. seperation.
-How to "hold uncomfortable sensations" instead of defaulting to our trauma responses in relationships.
Connect with Caitlin and find out about her upcoming programs here: https://www.instagram.com/iamcaitlinlili/
Welcome back to Commitment Phobe! This year I am continuing to level up the game with episodes that will provide you with rich content, incredible guests and stories on how to deepen and heal the intimacy and connection in all of your relationships in your life. With that in mind I had to bring on an old friend Spencer Jacobson, who's currently leading events around the world called Dance Meets Tantra, where they combine conscious dance, tantra, contact improvisation and kink.
Spencer and his team are committed to creating spaces where people can feel truly safe to strip themselves bare, leave behind everything that no longer serves, and to step into the most powerful and loving version of themselves. I knew he'd be a great person to talk to about intimacy!
Ever think to yourself about how hard it is to follow the advice to "just be yourself?" What if feeling safe and authentic in relationships was something you could actually faciliate and enable with the right tools and structure?
Spencer comes on to share tools and stories about how to actually create spaces in groups or personal relationships where you and others can feel free to be themselves and feel deeply seen and safe.
Some of the questions we touch on: -What does it actually mean to create safety in relationships? -How can we practically create more permission for authenticity? -Why is it important for us to connect to our feelings, especially anger, in relationships? -How do we take care of our nervous systems in relationshisp when we tend to bypass? -What does it mean to have self-responsibility in relationship and why is that important? -What are some ways we can be authentic with others vs. playing the role we think we need to play?
Find more info about Dance Meets Tantra here! https://www.dancemeetstantra.com/ Spencer also leads a 6 month mentorship, mastermind, and brotherhood journey for men that you can check out here: https://emergence.love/
Connect with Spencer on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/spencerjacobson_/?hl=en
The podcast is undergoing some revamping as I'm getting it ready for next year but I wanted to end the year off sharing some of the lessons I've learned in love and relationships this year and how it's been deeply transforming who I am!
What are you dying to hear more about? From who? What's going on in your life? I want to hear!!!
My e-mail: tanai.milgram@gmail.com
We accept the love we think we deserve. A statement like that is powerful, AND it's important to keep in mind that we don't have to beat ourselves up for what we accept, experience, tolerate and live in our relationships.
Mary Haberski, a tarot reader and spiritual guide, comes on to talk about how we can view relationships as tools and mirrors for self-love and personal growth.
Mary is passionate about helping people view their relationships as evolutionary tools from a compassionate lens.
There is a difference between what we want in relationship and what we actually attract or what feels safe to us in relationship, and looking at our patterns in dating can be useful to understand the difference, and how to close that gap.
Tune in to listen to Mary and I talk about how we can approach our relationships with more consciousness and less morality to feel more fulfilled and loved in our connections with others.
I met Mary through her CDMX WhatsApp group where she brings together hundreds of people to connect through conscious events and spiritual services. Her tarot readings are absolutely magical and supportive to anyone looking to bring more depth and understanding to their current life situation and view things from a more empowered viewpoint.
To contact Mary:
https://maryhaberski.com
https://www.tiktok.com/@tarotwitatwist?_t=8e4gMSRivif&_r=1
https://instagram.com/yogasurflove?igshid=NTc4MTIwNjQ2YQ==
Book a tarot reading and mention this podcast to get 11% off!
For years now, I have been telling the story of how over the past decade, I've chipped away at my intimacy fears and have become more and more available for deep connection, commitment and vulnerability.
I always tell the same story: I start liking someone, they start liking me back, I freak out, I leave.
But the truth is that I don't have avoidant tendencies, I have anxious-avoidant tendencies, many times I first freak out about percieving their distance or distinterest, and THEN I freak out about percieving their closeness.
You can imagine how confusing it was my whole life. I've decided to come on here to share about what it's been like, because I know there are lots of people out there who have felt the same, and it's always healing to reveal and talk about it!
Public speaking is among the most common phobias people have.
What if I choke? Will people find me interesting? Will I look stupid? How can I hide my anxiety?
My guest today, Eduardo Placer, dedicates his life to helping people transform and claim their power through speaking their truth in front of an audience through his public speaking coaching company Fearless Communicators.
I had the pleasure of taking one of their week-long trainings coming in THINKING I was just coming in to learn how to tell a story, and I learned SO much more about my power, my fears, and my purpose.
Tune in to listen to us talk about authenticity, the impact of masoginy on gay men, the cultural pressures of fitting in, and Eduardo's personal transformation through storytelling.
We talk about:
-Eduardo's thoughts on perfectionism and some of the ways he made peace with it as a "recovering perfectionist."
- How he believes we can alchemically shift our relationship to our speaking to become powerful communicators.
-Eduardo's childhood experiences being a gay child in a machista environment.
-Eduardo's journey from seeking to comfort by fixing himself to being authentic.
-How storytelling helps you feel empowered in relation to your past trauma.
-We dissect the word confidence and it's deep relationship to trust.
-How popularity is it's own curse and isn't actually the social "end all be all."
Today's guest, Eduardo Placer, is the founder of Fearless Communicators a public speaking coaching company that teaches communicators how to bring their whole BODY, MIND, HEART and SPIRIT to a moment and channel their message in service of an audience.
Originally from Miami, FL, he is proud son and grandson of immigrants who fled both fascism in Spain and communism in Cuba. Prior to starting Fearless Communicators®, he was a professional actor for over 15 years, performing in over 35 plays and musicals throughout the United States. Eduardo has an acute condition called SHOWTUNITIS where he breaks out into spontaneous song and dance. Eduardo has a BA in English from the University of Pennsylvania and MFA in Acting from the University of California, San Diego.
Check out the Fearless Communicators trainings at: https://www.fearlesscommunicators.com/
On today's episode I bring on a friend and inspiration, Nasya Miller to talk about friendships.
Nasya comes on to ring the alarm on why we should be focusing a lot more on the health and thrivingness of our friendships in a world full of romance and dating advice, coaches, therapists, tv shows and books.
The same challenges show up in our friendships, and with the loneliness epidemic we are experiencing, a big contributor is that we're not focusing on meeting those challenges and creating the friendships we desire.
What does it take to belong and feel happy in our friendships?
Nasya believes than upleveling your life entails upleveling your existing and new friendships.
Listen to this episode and you will leave feeling inspired to take inventory of the relationships in your life and consider how you can feel more connected or satisfied in them!
Topics we cover:
- Belonging, what does it mean to belong? How do we own our belonging? What does it look like in our relationships?
- Why are so many people feeling dissatisfied with their adult friendships?
- Simple tools to feel more nourished in your friendships and create friendships that don't drain you.
- Nasya's personal story with belonging and how she uplevels who she is and what she recieves from her friendships today.
- How to make friends as an adult.
- How to break-up friendships in a way that feels good. How to deal with the resistance of a break-up and make peace with the longevity of your friendships.
- Why we sometimes avoid honesty in friendships more than in our romantic relationships.
- Getting clear on expectations in your friendships and making space for what someone is available for.
and sooo much more juicy stories and tips!
"The quality of our relationships determines the quality of our lives."
Nasya Miller is a coach that helps communities, pairs and individuals have thriving and aligned relationships in their personal and proffesional lives. She’s an international facilitator, educator and certified Relationship Systems and Mindset Coach.
https://www.instagram.com/nasya.miller/
A couple of months ago I had the pleasure of connecting with a beautiful soul Roni Makatu and we got to share less than a week together, but in that short time we created a deep, intimate connection that was lovely and through it, I got to learn a lot about myself. SO, I felt like sharing him with all my listeners! Makatu is the Cofounder and CEO of a dating app called Lua.earth an emerging dating app for the conscious community.
Sharing his love through music, dance, sacred ceremonies, and transformative events, he creates spaces for people to connect and manifest magic in. He's also the producer of various festivals (such as ISTA Israel, ISTA online, Dance Temple, Ecstatic Festival.)
Tune in to listen to us talk about our connection, some of our takeaways from our time togethr and what he sees is needed in the dating world right now, which inspired him to create the Lua app!
Check out Lua at: https://www.lua.earth/
What does it take to really change your life? What does it take to make it extraordinary? For Alex Terranova, changing your life not only takes knowing what you want, but also committing to it FULLY and BEING the person that's aligned with that new life.
Today, Alex comes on to talk about what commitment really means, and how it's different from amateur commitment, or wanting something but not aligning who you ARE to what you want. Alex had a solid job, a busy social life and an active dating life, everything he thought he needed to be happy and succesful, then why wasn't he happy? One day someone asked him what he's grateful for, and he couldn't come up with an answer. That's the moment he decided to radically change his life and how he showed up in it.
Formerly an asshole who couldn't commit, Alex is now a men's coach in a thriving marriage, all a life he created by deciding to commit to being the kind of man that has that life.
Alex now helps men alchemize their lives and from ordinary and "good," to extraordinary and fulfilling! Tune in to learn more about Alex's journey and his thoughts and tips for those of you that are ready to transform your lives and stop accepting a life that doesn't make you happy.
Alex Terranova is a Leadership & Executive Coach, Performance & Success Alchemist, Professional Certified Coach (PCC), Author, International Speaker, and Retreat Leader. He's been dubbed “The Anti-Excuses Coach” by Yahoo Finance, named 40 over 40 in podcasting by Podcast Magazine & is the Co-Creator of The Alchemy of Men Retreats and Men's Groups and Your Love Adventure, an innovative, fun, & adventurous new take on dating. He's widely known as the docile tones behind hundreds of podcasts and sometimes refers to himself as a Recovering Asshole.
Connect with Alex: https://www.instagram.com/inspirationalalex/ msha.ke/thedreammason
On today's episode I invited Karim Yussif, my Taosit doctor whom I've been working for the past 5 months through acupunture, energy work and massage. After 7 years of working with practinioners on healing me heal from chronic back back, pelvic and stomach pain and seeing no resolution, I've been in shock with the progress I've had in our work. Karim has been supporting me in healing digestive system, blood circulation and releasing muscle tightness.
How this applies to this podcast, is that by healing my body and working with the emotional centers, I've in turn had massive healing and transformation in my intimate relationships and relationships with men.
How??? Tune in to learn from Karim the connection between our body, our emotions, our destiny, and the situations and relationships we create in our lives.
More and more in the wellness and mental health spaces, the awareness of our body's wisdom and the importance of listening to our body has become a hot topic. Psychologists and medical practitioners are recognizing the mind-body connection and seeing mental and physical healing as integrative and holistic.
However, this isn't news. Ancient philosophies such as Chinese medicine have recognized the connection of the mind, the body and soul for thousands of years.
Tune in to hear all about:
-Karim's story that brought him to work with Taoist medicine.
- How does your life show up in your body? How does your body impact your relationships and intimacy?
-The connection between your body and your spirit/soul.
-How different parts of our body connect to different emotions.
-Does the body really never lie and is it totally reliable to listen to our bodies?
-The importance of our blood flow.
-How long should we "be in our feelings" and what is the purpose of our emotions and feelings?
-Why my experiences in acupunture have been akin to having a breakthrough with psychedelics or holotropic breathwork.
-A very logical explanation to how our birthdate affects our personalities.
and so much more!
I love having guests come on and share the powerful ways of being and practices that help create authentic and loving connection in a relationship. This is why I invited Jonathan Hermida to come share about his conscious partnership!
If you met Jonathan Hermida as a bachelor, you would've never imagined that he'd eventually create a beautiful, thriving conscious partnership/marriage. Jonathan grew up within a very toxic masculine container, doing whatever he wanted without regard to how it'd affect others and finding his insatiable sense of self-worth in how much attention he was getting from women. In this very juicy episode Jonathan comes on to tell us how he went on an inward, self-discovery journey to heal his own insecurities and trauma and transform who he was in his life and in his relationships. Some of the topics we touch on: -What the flow of masculine and femine energy looks like in his relationship and why that polarity is so important. -What he learned about the most important ingredients for a thriving relationship from his own experience and the couple he's interviewed for his company Capsul. -Jonathan's thoughts on men's needs to receive and have a space to be in their feminine. -The divine way in which he met his partner and how he pursued her despite her resistance! -How to communicate needs in a relationship from a place of collaboration vs. competition. -The patterns that are responsible for most breakups. -What Jonathan means by, "the result of getting out of our own way is harmony." And so much more!
Jonathan is a Miami born entrepreneur and master coach who has dedicated his life and career to connecting humans: to themselves, to others, and to life. Jonathan is also a mindfulness teacher, world-traveller, life long athlete, and most importantly, a devoted husband and father. He is currently growing a company he co-founded called Capsul as CEO. From Capsul: Capsul enables families to capture, preserve and share your most cherished memories, from your kids to your grandparents, though intimate, guided, and immersive storytelling enhanced by emerging technologies. Our vision is to revolutionize the way families connect and share their memories becoming the go-to platform for family communication and memory preservation in the world. Check it out here! https://yourcapsul.com/about-us/
Connect with Jonathan: https://www.instagram.com/jonathanhermida_/ https://www.linkedin.com/in/jonathan-hermida/
Today my guest is a past client and incredibly talented tattoo artist and entrepreneur Chloe Besson who joins me today to tell her story on the breakthroughs she's had around people pleasing and why telling the truth has been such an integral part of it.
Chloe and I started working together just as she was leaving a 4 year relationship where she lost herself, and through our work together and her work with other coaches, therapists and AA, she realized how scared she was to tell people the truth and risk losing their love.
Join us to hear the steps she took in living a more authentic life by: - Setting boundaries and saying "no" in places that were draining her energy. - Cutting out the mechanisms she was using to numb herself and her discomfort, like drinking. - Learning how to prioritize herself and the unconventional ways she likes to live her life. - Realizing she can't possibly make all her followers and clients happy, and instead choosing her own happiness. - Speaking up for what she believes in and making choices in her business that FELT right for her.
On today's episode I share my own experience on breaking my pattern of always thinking about where I'll meet the one and how upsetting it was that I was single. How was it possible that I was so happy with my life yet my thoughts always went back to-"why am I single?" and "I'm never going to meet someone" or, "I don't deserve to meet someone." I got curious around where these questions were coming from. Did I really desire/need someone or was it coming from a deeper place, the part of me that hadn't felt chosen since I was a little girl? Tune in to listen to how I started relating to that part differently in order to experience more presence in my life and my relationship to dating and men.
This is an episode I recorded in December where I talk about one of the nemesis of intimacy: pride.
Sometimes the only thing keeping us from saying the vulnerable thing is being too prideful to admit something or share something that may make us look bad (according to our egos of course.) In this episode I share a short personal experience of how I confronted my own pride and how that's shown up in several relationships in my life.
On today's episode, Janira Martinez comes on to tell us the story of her life through the lense of intimacy and relationships. Growing up, Janira wasn't the relationship type, she was the “cool girl” that just wanted to keep it casual and acted like wasn’t phased by endings. Having been raised without a father present and a mom that told her to be careful with men and never trust them, Janira didn't really know what it meant to open her heart to men or be available for love.
Until one day, Janira felt deep inside her that something was off. The hook ups weren't doing it for her anymore. There was an emptiness inside her she suddenly became aware of. Tune in to listen to Janira's journey in: -Healing her relationship with the masculine/men. -Accessing her vulnerability and feelings. -Coming to the awareness that she WANTS committment and a romantic relationship. -How healing her relationship with her birth father was important to her healing -The role Janira sees of self-love in relationship and our ability tto receive love from others.
Janira Martinez is a Desire & Soul Coach and master of diving into the depths. Described as “a woman who not only talks-the-talk, but walks-the-walk -- with amazing grace and glory” her coaching lands in a way that can only be communicated by a true practitioner. Bringing together principles from Orgasmic Meditation, Somatic Psychology, spirituality, and life itself, Janira's mission is to guide powerful women back home to the magic of their bodies and the truth of their souls. For more about her work follow on IG @janira_martinez or visit her website janiramartinez.com
On this very juicy epiosde my guests are Ana Del Castillo and Ken Blackman, two beautiful humans and coaches come on the podcast today to share truths and golden nuggets of wisdom from their own relationship and how they help couples return to a place of love and connection when they're in the muck.
Some themes we cover:
-How to deal with dissapointment in relationship.
-Why it's important to teach our significant other's how to love us and what we need.
-What it means to hold high-regard for another and why it's so important to keep attraction and harmony alive in relationship
-Why they believe sex actually gets BETTER with time.
-How Ana and Ken started dating and the way they dealt with Ana's financial instability challenges that could've threatened the relationship.
-Why they often meet clients that only get to to truly deeply know their significant others after YEARS.
-An unconventional view on foreplay.
-"Men are spoiled and entitled in and out of the bedroom" and what to do about it!
-Why we need to drop the narrative of being "too sensitive" and actually listen to our deepest emotional needs.
and so much more!!
Ana Del Castillo and Ken Blackman work together to help couples "seeing the actual human being they fell in love with rather than the idea they had of how that person should be." Together they help couples that are in the muck uncover the storylines that are blocking them from connection and help them connect to their love for each other again.
More individual info:
Ken Blackman, coach, speaker, educator, and author of the book, Powerful Woman, Confident Man: The New Art of Loving Passionately and Building a Resilient, Fulfilling Relationship. His life’s work is to guide couples through intimate human connection. Using truth, transparency, and compassion, he shows committed couples how to co-create a relationship that uniquely serves them.
Ana Del Castillo is a Rightness Expert and Certified Coach, and she works with people who have it all but consistently feel like there’s something wrong or feel dead and unsatisfied with their lives. Ana works with them to discover and own their inherent passion and rightness so they can feel vital and alive again.
This week I had a really eye-opening conversation with transformational coach and full-time dad Mark Guay about all the questions I've personally had and my clients have had about men and their relationship to their emotions.
Because of societal conditioning, childhood trauma and expectations, men in particular don't feel safe emoting and viscerally feeling an emotion, which is why Mark finds his work so important, in helping men reconnect to themselves
What we talk about:
-How to build a productive relationship with our "loyal soldier" aka the mechansism we developed to survive as children that no longer serve us as adults.
-The surprising problem that comes up when a man only opens up with his partner.
-Why Mark believes it's so important for men to have a group of men to open up to.
-Mark's personal journey from numbness to presence.
-Why do some men think they need to be financially "there" before they get in a relationship?
-How Mark works with men on understanding the edge of the expression of their anger.
-How to set up boundaries in a leadership role at work and work with the need to "save the day."
Mark is a transformational coach, speaker, and full-time dad who lives in San Diego, CA. He helps high-powered men navigate the messiness of soul development. His talks and courses have reached over 1 million people worldwide.
Back in May 2022, I led a retreat for women about unleashing their sensuality and connecting womanhood and these women were TRANSFORMED in the sensual dancing class led by Sunshine.
I HAD to get her on the podcast and talk to her about body positivity, sensuality, femininity and how she views pole dancing as a metaphor for life.
As a woman who was always one of the boys, Sunshine never considered herself to feminine or sensual, and she speaks for many women including myself who didn't grow up feeling connected to the sensuality of their body.
Enjoy this episode and I hope it inspires you!
Casey has been a client of mine for 2 years and I've been so blown away from her growth that I had to have her on the podcast!
Casey has such a unique love and hunger for life that is so contagious!
She was always a free spirit, but she often felt guilt for thinking about herself and expressing her joy instead of taking care of other people's feelings which left her feeling like a victim. She feared judgment and rejection and it would keep her from following her own desires.
As a feeler and a lover, processing emotions during conflict, hard moments/decisions and endings has been an important part of her empowerment journey and what's helped her tune into her inner knowing.
Tune in to listen to Casey talk about what helps her get through the hard times:
-Casey share some tools that help her trust her inner knowing and that everything is always going to work out for her.
-How she practices giving herself space and time to heal.
-The importance of letting yourself be supported and receive support.
-Following intuition as soon as it whispers to you to prevent further suffering.
-Settling your nervous system and raising your vibration before you confront a trigger.
Today, Casey is in the relationship she always dreamed of, coaches kids' soccer, teaches English to women living in the US who want to get more respect in the workplace.
Claudia believes women can have it all.
As a go-getter, free-spirited woman who got married at 37, Claudia was never going to have the cookie-cutter conventional wife and mother life.
She sees unhappy women sacrifice their joy and pleasure for the sake of their family and knew there was a different way.
As a mother, Claudia puts herself first. She takes care of her pleasure, her desires, her purpose, and as a result she's seen how her happiness is mirrored in the happiness of her family and her son.
"You have to decide that it's possible to have the partnership and be the parents that you want to be."
No one has the right answers, but I love many perspective's Claudia has that most people aren't considering about taking care of your needs as a parent and how you can have the lifestyle you want WITH or WITHOUT a partner and kids.
Tune in to listen to Claudia's healing journey with her own parents, her challenges with freedom in relationship, the importance of conviction in your desires and her advice to mothers struggling with their self-care!
Claudia Whitney is a Certified Hypnotherapist and Life + Business Coach for Women. She skillfully creates a space where you discover a deeper connection to yourself, awaken your inner fire, gain clarity on your vision, and become the woman you were born to be. She combines CONSCIOUSNESS COACHING™️, Spirituality, Leading Mindset Techniques, and Hypnosis to reprogram your self-worth and self-belief. As a result, her clients go from feeling stuck and limited to courageously and confidently bringing their dreams into real life!
Sometimes I hear what people say to each other in conflict and think, there are so many layers between what they're saying to each other, and the REAL, vulnerable, raw, tender, thing those words are covering.
I think if we shared with each other our feelings, our truth, our vulnerability, the things we're scared to share because they might cause the relationship to end or they might make us "look bad" we'd all have a lot more intimacy and connection in our relationships.
We just haven't been taught how to say those things.
We are busy protecting ourselves and defending ourselves rather than revealing ourselves.
As much as people may love each other, most people are used to talking to each other like the enemy, the bad guy, the one doing something wrong, the one causing harm, the one I need to protect myself from.
This episode I talk about some tools to use in conflict with others.
Many of you have asked me lately how is it that I show up on social media every day and share so openly and vulnerably about myself and my life.
As you've heard me talk about on this podcast, vulnerability did NOT always come easy to me, and posting my story on Instagram has actually been one of the biggest tools I have used to step deeper and deeper into my truth sharing and vulnerability.
So I came on today to tell you a little more about that!
Enjoy!
Are you a jealous person?
If so, how do you work with jealousy in your relationships?
Jealousy is SUCH a touchy subject for some people, so I wanted to have a conversation about it with some fresh perspectives.
My guests today, Rishi Bond and Vanessa Viglietta, are two friends from different corners of the world whom I brought together to talk about the role jealousy plays in relationships and how we can actually use it for learning and personal growth.
I chose Vanessa for this conversation because she's in an open relationship with her partner and I wanted to hear how she works with jealousy in a way that betters the relationship.
Rishi on the other hand, wanted to bring in the masculine perspective from "player" to "conscious relating".
If you find it hard to deal with jealousy or talk about it, you don't want to miss this one!
Here's what we talk about:
-How jealousy can be a path to your desires.
-How Vanessa changed relationship with women by using jealousy as curiosity marker.
-Working through jealousy in poly/open relationships.
-How talking about jealousy openly can deepen connection and intimacy with your partner.
-Rishi's way of using jealousy to manipulate women and what inspired him to change.
-My own relationship to jealousy and how it's come up in dating.
-How helpful it can be to talk about infidelity in partnership.
-The difference between envy and jealousy.
-How our upbringing shaped our perspective on jealousy being a sin.
And so much more juiciness!
Connect with Rishi Bond: https://www.instagram.com/rishibond/
Connect with Vanessa Viglietta:
https://www.instagram.com/vanessaviglietta/
Being bullied for being the "fat girl" at school, Reva Wild grew up thinking her body was a problem, and wasn't worthy of loving.
It wasn't until she took an unconventional college dance class that she started questioning the voice in her head that said she was broken, and the stories in her environment that told her she "should" be and look different.
Today Reva is the Co-CEO of a sexual shamanic training WILDGRACE that teaches on on the feminine tantric arts and intuitive awakening.
She has supported hundreds of clients and participants, from women and non binary folks to couples and preteen girls, with her wild and tangible passion for reclaiming our genesis as beings of eros and igniting them to fall in love with their bodies, power of choice and deepest desires.
Tune in to a very important conversation about the role our stories and beliefs have in our self-image, self-expression and happiness, and how it important it is to question them and let go of any that tell us we're not ok exactly the way we are.
-What is our feminine side? Why has it been repressed in the last thousands of years?
-What does it mean to rewild?
-What is our "havigness level" and the small ways Reva practiced expanding hers to receive more and more abundance and love.
-Why it's so healing to be naked in spaces with other people.
-Reva's surprising way to deal with the fear of judgement as a feminine leader who's always walked her own path.
-How Reva transformed her relationship with her inner critic.
-How dance was a powerful tool for Reva's return to loving herself and feeling all of her emotions.
Reva's mission is to create spaces where people question their stories and patterns of feeling small, unworthy, and undesirable and invite people deeper into their own expression to choose the freedom and eroticism that's possible in their bodies.
https://www.instagram.com/reva.wild/
https://www.thewildgracemovement.com/trainings
"So it's not Commitment Phobia, I just like breaking and making bonds?"
"So it's not Commitment Phobia, I just don't really do anything between a one-night stand and a soulmate connection?"
These were my reactions the first time I learned about my specific human design!
Human Design combines astrology, the I Ching, Kabbalah and Vedic philosophy, centering around the division of personalities into five energy types alleged to indicate how someone is supposed to exchange energy with the world: Manifestors, Generators, Manifesting Generators, Projectors, and Reflectors.
Join me in a conversation with Human Design Specialist Bri Rubin as we talk about the different ways learning your Human Design can support you with learning about yourself, your desires and behaviors when it comes to love and relationships.
Bri is extremely passionate about Human Design and shares some fun facts that can help you have so much approval for yourself once you learn your design.
In a world where we have a lot of stories of what's "right" and "wrong" such as calling someone a commitment phobe, Human Design is a breath of fresh air, pointing to the importance of honoring YOUR natural way of relating and relationship to love and sex.
Bri Rubin is a Human Design Specialist, an artist, yoga teacher and coach. In addition to giving readings and providing ongoing integration support, she also works for MyBodyGraph and Jovian Archive, the official library of primary source Humam Design material.
Book a call with Bri through her IG account _brirubin_
On today's episode I talk about my experience practicing detachment and surrender with money lately and how it also applies to relationships.
My relationship with money (like everyone else's) has had it's kinks and I've taken it more seriously than ever this year to really heal the limiting beliefs and blocks I had around creating financial abundance in my business.
On this podcast I share with you how letting go of the results I wanted and tapping into the feelings of my desired future really helped me get out of the scarcity mindset and frustration I was in.
I talk about:
-Why it was so helpful when one of my coaches told me I might not make any money this year.
-How I was experiencing my own neediness get in the way of having ease in my business.
-What we miss out on when we don't have patience and don't slow down.
-Why it's enlightening to ask yourself why you DON'T want to make money/have a relationship.
-What I learned in my one week in Medellin around listening to myself.
-The opportunity I got to step into my power when sh*t fell apart right before I led a retreat.
-The misconceptions we have around attachment vs. authenticity when we talk about attachment styles.
And more!!
How do we give ourselves what we hope others give us?
What does it look like to fill up our own cup?
This is an important question to ask ourselves, because if we can't give the love we want to ourselves we won't be able to see it or receive it from others.
My guest Rinsha Ballani has for years, worked on putting herself first in her life and being her own greatest lover.
Rinsha grew up conditioned to think that someone and something OUT THERE was going to make her feel loved.
She did not believe she could trust herself.
She based her relationship desires on what magazines and the movies told her.
Through her work and journey in life she started saying no to the life she'd built around making others happy and started looking at what SHE wanted and needed to stop being miserable.
Tune in to find inspiration in Rinsha's radical transformation in her relationship to herself and in her creation of a life where we only does what she wants to do.
We tallk about:
-How discovering your desires may take asking yourself what you want over and over again.
-Rinsha's turning point of leaving her old life behind and driving herself across the country.
-What it means to have your own inner "trust bank."
-Why Rinsha buys lingerie for herself.
-Why we won't ACTUALLY want people to pour love into us sometimes.
Contact Rinsha at @rinshaballani on Instagram to find out about her 1-1 coaching and her free Facebook Community for big birls called "Live Big" where big girls can receive love support and connection.
"It's a joy to watch people relax into who they are."
Araminta is passionate about helping people come back to their authentic truth and expression by learning how to be with their emotions and their full range of human experience.
How do we learn from our emotions and our body?
It was a pleasure to get Araminta's perspective on how to live in alignment with our feelings and truth and what happens when we fall in love with another.
Historically, our whole culture of love and relationship is new.
Tune in to listen to Araminta talk about why it's powerful to give up the idea of finding the "one" and how romantic love/eros is a way to help one come into sacred union with oneself, rather than with another.
"You are your own princess/prince."
We also talk about:
-Importance of being curious about the sacred messages behind our emotions.
-How to work through codependency and caretaking in relationship.
-Reframing the relationship with rage.
-Feeling what is right and wrong in every moment within us and standing up for that.
-What does it mean to listen to your body vs your head?
-How sexual desire/erotic energy is a way our body gets our attention to lead us towards a certain direction.
-How pleasure can heal us.
-The roles that projection and mirroring have when we fall in love.
My guest Araminta Barbour is a Lead Faculty with ISTA (the International School of Temple Arts) with whom she has collaborated since 2011, Araminta is the founder of The Sanctuary Guatemala, creator of The Resilience Journey, and co-creator of the Women Who See In The Dark project.
My conversation today is with my good friend Kyle Mercer who talks to me about the power of what he calls the "want for us."
As opposed to asking ourselves in a relationship what I want or what you want, there's a lot more harmony and connection possible when together, we think about what's the want for us, and what kind of decisions we would be making in honor of that want.
We also talk about:
-Setting boundaries and context in relationship and using the RBDSM conversation.
-The deconstruction part of our journey that's necessary for change or creating something new.
-The different levels of consciousness we operate from.
Kyle’s website: https://www.lifeataltitude.com/
Kyle’s Instagram: www.instagram.com/inquirymethod
Kyle’s Book available on Amazon: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Life-Altitude-Elevating-Think-Experience-ebook/dp/B08JHRY1F3/ref=sr_1_1?crid=1S01MM6FIPBOZ&keywords=life+at+altitiude+kyle+mercer&qid=1649329934&s=books&sprefix=life+at+altitiude+kyle+mercer%2Cstripbooks%2C52&sr=1-1-spell
"Just be yourself" isn't such a simple task to take on.
As a Jamaican Puerto Rican man from Jersey, Chris Rodriguez struggled with that as he experienced many situations where we muted or changed his personality to fit into the proffesional industry, from softening himself so he wasn't perceived as a threat, to the way we dressed.
Eventually, he lost himself, his expression of his authentic emotions and his connection to his true passions and talents.
How can we really be ourselves if we're not realizing the ways we're abandoning ourselves to fit? All the while being told mixed messages to be ourselves but also not too unique that it disrupts the norm?
Chris comes on to tell his story on reconnecting to himself and how he helps others do that through movement and coaching and what he says is "living through that soul place."
Chris talks about how innovation can't happen when you don't let people bring their soulful presence.
He also talks about how to bring your story into your world without bringing your unresolved trauma by blowing it on other people.
He emphasizes on the importance of having people in our lives that can see us in all of our unresolved places.
Tune in to listen to so much more about expressing anger in relationships, the turtle and storm spectrum in conflict, and the role of permission givers in our lives.
Connect to Chris on Instagram at @coach_chrisrodriguez
Briana Cribeyer and Blake Zealar used to have cookie cutter relationships, often monogamous ones, even though their true desire was to be in open relationships and be free in their sexual expression and connection. To them, open relating can be a spiritual practice that challenges you to take your integrity and healing to the next level in relationship by getting more comfortable with the unknown, uncertainty, and creating the safety within instead of relying on the external or the other for it.
Tune in to this week's episode to hear about their journeys in their sexual liberation and and how that impacted their comfort in their own bodies, aliveness and self-expression.
We talk about:
-How to create longing before connecting to someone and how that helps your nervous system relaxing.
-How to lean into edges and follow triggers in relationships to heal.
-How they worked on their codependent patterns in relationships.
-Ways of creating safety through conversation in relationships to break codepentent patterns.
-The benefits of keeping the future of relationships a mystery vs. planning a detailed vision of your future.
-How to create healthy space in relationship and bring consciouness to each person's needs when you come back together.
-Taking turns in holding the masculine and feminine poles.
-How to keep the spark alive in relationship.
and so much more juiciness!
I had the honor of learning from Briana and Blake in an ISTA training (The International School of Temple Arts) where they taught me what it looks like to be fully slef-expressed leaders and thw power of connecting to and expressing BOTH your feminine and masculine energies.
If you're curious to work with Briana and Blake on sacred sexuality body or your relationship dynamics virtually or in person reach out to them on www.brianacribeyer.com or find them on Instagram @blakezealar or @she_boldly_goes_
You know when you can tell someone is an old soul?
That's my perception of Mikey, an intuitive therapist who's passionate about helping people get to know what's going on inside them.
Today we talked about some specific ways that our wounds in our relationships with our parents impact our present reality.
Tune in to learn what's the difference between the mother and the father wound, what do they represent, and why it's so important to heal your past in order to relate more powerfully with your present.
We also speak on the power of our intuition, how you can develop and connect to it and how to become aware of what's informing your intuition to take more personal responsibility in your life.
Mikey is an intuitive therapist and coach that works with those who are seeking genuine and tangible change in their lives. He offers therapy and other interventions to help you heal and unlock your full potential. As an intuitive therapist he draws on the deep reality of soul and psyche to help you find direction and relief.
You can find him by connecting with him on instagram @mikey.brackett
Or by heading to his website where you can learn more about him and directly book with him
Www.Mikeybrackett.com
Being vulnerable and looking inwards can be scary huh?
How do we really build the courage to walk through what seems like a dark path and reveal our truths when we are so scared?
My guest today, Zach didn't grow up having an easy time being vulnerable. Like most of us, he wanted to hide everything that was wrong and show everyone that he was okay. His biggest fear was not being loved and accepted by others.
However, that wasn't leading to a fulfilling life. He was constantly seeking for approval in women to feel worthy, had no idea what he wanted, and carried a lot of childhood pain.
Tune in to listen Zach's courageous choice to turn towards his darkness and "secrets" to turn his life around and find liberation.
Some things we talk about:
-How Zach healed his relationship with his father in his adult life.
-How vulnerability became a key part of Zach's life to truly create relationships he loved.
-How Zach's pursuit of women was a way of trying to get the love he never got from his mother.
-How Zach's did a feminine cleanse to get to know what he wants and who he is.
-Why Zach feels it's so important to look inward and heal our "repressed childhood."
-Zach's path towards getting to know himself and building what he wanted his life and relationships to look like.
-How to stay connected and nourish your relationship when things are "vanilla."
Zachary is a writer, a coach and a heart-centered entrepreneur who loves helping others. His writing focuses on his experiences around holistic health, inner child work, addiction, recovery, spirituality, and fatherhood. His coaching is devoted to helping people experience deep fulfillment in relationships, career, and life.
You can connect with him at zacharygoodson.com.
In the fall of 2020 I decided to commit to only tell the truth for a month, inspired by a practice called "integrity cleanse" which was made popular by Martha Beck who explains that our very health depends on us telling the truth.
“The second you leave your truth, your immune system function goes down, your heart rate goes up, adrenaline spikes, and stress hormones increase.”
Tune in to find out what I learned, experienced, how that radically transformed how I feel in relationships with my friends, family and men and why I decided to turn that month-long challenge into a lifelong one.
Being able to tell my truth unapologetically without any filters has been one of the most life changing practices for me.
**Today we talk about the importance of clearning emotions in our bodies in order to clear beliefs that don't serve us with Shadi Henau.
Shadi started journeying with cacao in 2014 in Guatemala and it was such a powerful experience that led him back to his heart.**
If you're curious to learn about cacao check out this episode to hear about how cacao can be a versatile tool used for spiritual and emotional processing and help us drop down into our body and let the mind step back for higher wisdom to come through.
We talk about:
- Releasing trauma from our body that we stored because we weren't able to deal with strong emotions in the past.
- How feeling is healing and the power of sittign with uncomfortable, unpredictable emotions.
- The misconceptions and judgements we have about being in our wildness.
-What are the hard bus, easy bus, and magic bus in life?
Shadi Henau is a cacao medicine carrier who’s been holding transformational cacao rituals events and trainings for 7 years in Guatemala.
Exactly one month ago I did a spiritual sexual shamanic training with the international school of temple arts which was one of the most powerful and liberating experiences of my life and I had the pleasure of having Shadi as one of the facilitators.
To find out about Shadi's online cacao practinioner training check out:
Use code CPTTM for $25 off
https://www.onespiritworld.com/cacao-practitioner-training
My guest today, Shely Esses, is such a refreshing human! I was taken back by her level of comfort talking about all things sex.
Shely believes in the importance of getting to know our body parts as a way of creating a deeper connection with ourselves.
She's very passionate about dissolving all of the shame that's intrinsically associated with sex and helping people heal their own sexual shame due to a number of reasons such as: lack of sexual education, lack of exploration of their own body and lack of conversations around sex and their sexual needs.
Topics we discuss:
- Shely sexual experience growing up in a religious Jewish background.
- Redifining the concept of "losing your virginity."
- The impact of the lack of in depth sexual education for children and teenagers.
- How our mind impacts our sexual experience and the connection between the mind and our sex organs
- How Shely helps patients with sexual conditions such as pelvic floor dysfunction or erectile dysfunction.
- The fears that show up for many men around hurting women that impact their sex.
- The changes being created by orthodox therapist that are out to transform how sex is viewed in orthodox communities.
Shely Esses is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist that works as a Sex and Relationship Therapist and Post-Partum doula that helps people unblock honest emotional expression and feel comfortable in their own skin and bodies.
Connect with Shely on Instagram @shelyrachel.lpmft
What are soulmates? What are their purpose?
How is it similar and different than the romantic idea of soulmates we have as a collective?
How do soulmates help us align with our purpose?
My guest today Farah Assad Reyes believes in the importance of looking inward and facing ourselves when we're confronted with situations in life that we don't understand or feel stuck in.
What's helped her do that? Powerful spiritual tools like tarot, kabbalah and astrology.
In this episode, Farah beautifully explains how spiritual tools like astrology and tarot can be powerful tools to help us do that and how soulmates have specific missions in our lives for our soul's journey as well.
What we talk about:
- The difference between focusing on how we feel in relationship vs. figuring out if someone is "the one."
-How can we use astrology, kabbalah and tarot, meditation, etc as tools to get to know ourselves on a deeper level
-How your astrological chart gives you the information and map you need to grow your soul.
-What is karma? What does it have to do with the reason our souls incarnate?
-How our triggers and struggles hold important lessons us.
Farah Assad Reyes is an astrologer with a kabbalistic astrology background related to the soul.
She is also a tarot reader, yoga teacher.
To get in touch with Farah contact her through her Instagram:
https://instagram.com/farahassadastrologa?utm_medium=copy_link
Farah works with both English and Spanish speaking clients.
You know that woman in your IG feed that keeps upleveling and conquering bigger and bigger mountains and you’re like, “holy sh*t how does she do it?” #goals
To me and to many, that’s Sarah Akiba. Among many roles, this woman is the founder of the nonprofit AWOM, Angel Watching Over Me, the founder of the creative agency AWOM Lab, and she’s a celebrity stylist and creative director.
Sarah’s philosophy in life is to “do whatever it takes.”
Tune in to listen to how Sarah taps two things that helped her turn her dreams and projects into reality:
1) Her passion to help as much as she can
2) Putting herself first
Some things we touch on:
-How Sarah is driven to make an impact in the world.
-The importance of surrounding yourself with people that believe in you.
-How Sarah’s vision and belief in herself got her through her darkest times.
-Sarah's perspective on the role of struggle and how to see the beauty in the pain and struggle.
Learn about AWOM at https://www.awom.org/
Get in touch with Sara through her Instagram https://www.instagram.com/soakiba
So the other day I shared on my Instagram that I want to talk about sex more on this podcast and my friend Maxine immediately replied!
Maxine is fascinated by sex and how humans interact sexually. She feels passionate about the importance of getting to know ourselves sexually outside of relationship and above all, she feels we should be TALKING about sex more! We see so much sex in our media and ads yet no conversations about it!
After realizing her inability to talk about sex Maxine started talking about it with her friends, partners, and doing research about the different ways one can engage in sex! Now she's an advocate for having conversations about sex and putting them out there to stop making sex a shameful taboo.
If you want an inspiring, thought-provoking conversation about sex, this is it!
Some things we talk about:
-The importance of learning how different people get turned on differently!
-How to use jealousy and sharing turn-ons to cultivate connection and attraction within the relationship.
-Maxine's personal journey learning how to get to know her own sexual desires and how to express them with others.
-How we can start sharing about the things that scare us the most, and how that leads to releasing shame.
-Is it that some people don't feel sex is important to them or have they just not found their flavor of it because of lack of knowledge and exploration?
-What Maxine has learned from friends that have differently kind of relationships.
Maxine Cher is a Marriage and Famiy Masters graduat working towards her PHD.
To connect with her, follow her on Instagram on @maxinecher.mft
When I met Meg Beatty and Kevin Hermann, I was instantly inspired by their shared self-expression, intimacy and dedication to what they call “tending the fire of the relationship.”
We are living in an amazing time of exploration and approval in the relationship world that would’ve been considered outside the norm just a few years ago.
Whatever form of relationship we’re in, monogamous, poly, open, what stays true is that in order for the relationship to thrive it takes a lot of attention and “work” that doesn’t have to feel like work according to Meg and Kevin!
Tune in to this week’s episode to listen to the special ways Megan and Kevin nurture their relationship in a way that’s connected, clear, communicative and fun.
What you can expect in this episode:
- How Meg and Kev intentionally create their own milestones and phases in their relationship such as the “honeysun.”
- How they create the structure and space to allow their relationship “work” to feel easy and fun.
- Meg’s experience working with the attachment to know “where is this going?” and how clarity provided the freedom from the relationship anxieties.
- How you build the thing determines what the thing becomes. How this concept powerfully influenced their dating in the first three months.
- Their weekly check-in practice that Kevin mentioned in his episode on Commitment Phobe!
- What is the fire of the relationship and how do they keep the flames alive?
- The importance of communicating intentions and desires in sex and intimacy.
- The role of judgement in feeling turn off and how to create turn on when it feels inaccessible.
- Sexual playgrounds vs sexual cages.
And so much more!!
Connect with Megan and Kevin on their Instagram profiles:
Kevin Hermann: https://instagram.com/kev_hermann?utm_medium=copy_link
Megan Beatty: https://instagram.com/houseofmaro?utm_medium=copy_link
When my friend Kristelle offered to take my first photoshoot for my coaching business I thought, "great! some free photos from a friend."
Then I looked at the photos and thought, "Oh sh*t. This woman has a really, special eye. This is different."
Kristelle has a way of capturing vulnerability, power and intimacy in her photos in a very real and natural way. I've been so curious about the brain behind the photos that I decided to have her as a guest on my podcast so she can share her personal life journey and how she captures moments of intimacy in her photos.
How does she do it?
It all starts with curiosity, she says.
This episode will be very relatable to anyone who has that passion they set aside as a "hobby" as a kid because they felt the pressure to do something more responsible or profitable.
Tune in to listen to some of Kristelle's stories about her life in Lebanon, her marriage, and how she followed a desire to express her talents that took on a life of its own and has now become a profitable business!
Check out Kristelle's work at: https://kristelleboulos.com/
Connect with Kristelle at: @fromkbwithlove
If you have any questions for me or want to connect follow me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/tanaimilgram
Today my guest Derek Hart gives us some incredibly helpful insight on what it takes to maintain harmony in relationships and rebuild them when they're broken in his very own process of "reinvention." How does Derek define reinvention?
I follow Derek on Facebook and absolutely love the truth bombs he posts on his profile that always grab my attention and create conversations amongst his followers. I decided to spice this episode up by randomly selecting different things he's posted and having him build more on each status and tell us the story behind them.
Tune in to hear us talk about:
-How can we really create compassion between two people in a relationship.
-What's Derek's role in a session? Why is it important to work with a third person when trying to rebuild and repair a relationship?
-How can we share our needs in relationships with humility and love vs. defensiveness and demand?
-How can couples disagree with each other while remaining deeply connected?
"All relationships must be reinvented from time to time, and this is your time to focus back on the person you committed your life to."-Derek
Learn more about what Derek does and how you can work with him on his website: https://www.understandeachother.com/
You can also follow him on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/derek.michael.hart
How do we follow our desires when we're SO used to doing what we should?
How do we even know what we want when we've been doing exactly what we know will get people to like us?
This episode with my friend and Women's Coach Danielle Hatton is aaalll about the good girl conditioning, something I can very much relate to!
Danielle grew up being the good girl that always kept it together to avoid causing any conflict or chaos, and knew exactly what to do to be desireable to men. She was so well behaved she even got the reputation in her family as the "golden child."
Then her life turned upside down and caused Danielle to question everything. Why wasn't she actually fulfilled even though she was doing everything by the book?
Danielle's path to her truth and live a life designed by her desires has largely meant deconstructing how she was showing up in the world to try to be a good girl that was always liked, and instead, getting in touch with what SHE wanted and what she was hiding from the world.
Other things we talk about:
-How to talk about our sexual desires with approval in relationships.
-Why Danielle called off her wedding.
-How Danielle got the courage to outgrow her good girl identity.
-Why it's so important to get in touch with our true desires.
Danielle Hatton is a Women's Coach that helps unfulfilled women gain clarity on what they truly desire & have the courage to create it.
Contact her on Instagram to learn how to work with her or listen to her podcast Allow Accept Love:
https://www.instagram.com/daniellehattonn/?hl=en
Having a connected, vulnerable, authentic relationship requires people to be authentic, vulnerable, and deeply connected to themselves. How do we do that?
Mike Aidala talks about it from a holistic perspective: what we eat, how fast we're moving, where we live, how active we are, how connected to our bodies we feel... all of these things impact our abilities to feel connection and turn on in relationships and sex.
Other things we touch on:
-Mike's personal journey that led him to becoming a coach.
-Masculine archetypes
-The rise of erectile dysfunction
-The power of vision quests
-Communicating our feelings and needs in relationships
Mike Aidala is a leading Performance and Mindset coach who has been mentioned in: Mens Journal, GQ, AskMen, Gear Patrol, Well+Good, PopSugar, Harpers Bazzar, Valet Magazine and more. He is one of the top coaches in America and has been coaching and guiding others for over 15 years.
Mike's various programs are for individuals who want to establish an enhanced, more familiar relationship with their mental, emotional and physical selves. He works with Men and Woman on a 1:1 basis using a range of modalities to create, personalized programs that build confidence, clarity and conviction leading to a healthy, happy and more fulfilled life. Learn more about 1:1 coaching here.
His Men’s Groups are renowned for their ability to dive deep into issues men face today and come out feeling stronger and more confident that ever.
Read about men’s experiences here.
Mike is also a lifetime athlete having experience from collegiate football to Olympic weightlifting, competitive stand-up paddle-boarding, ultra marathons, hand-balancing, strongman, big mountain biking and skiing, partner acrobatics, yoga and much more! Mike has spent his life seeking and studying a state of awareness through introspective wellness practices and movement.
He also created Mountain Hawk Provisions which designs conscious jewelry.
He looks forward to helping you on your journey to health optimization.
Welcome back to season 2 of Commitment Phobe!
I couldn't think of a better guest to launch us off than my new friend Cailin McDuff, a women's coach who is an embodiment of full self-expression and approval for who she is in the world. This woman is sweet, funny, sexy, wild, silly, wise, and she is not afraid to embody all of it without holding back.
Cailin and I talk about what it means to let go of the threads of your life that aren't true, let go of everywhere in your life where you're holding back your desires and instead, living a life led by your desires.
We talk about the shame women have over their hunger for more in their lives and relationships and how she helps women start to have approval for their desires, their yearning and their darkness. (You'll have to tune in to know what I mean when I say that!)
About Cailin:
Cailin McDuff loves helping women slow down, connect with their bodies, and learn to receive so that they can enjoy a life based in desire. Having never had an orgasm until the age of 33 to now fully connecting with her body and all the sensations it provides, Cailin created a safe community-- Cocoon, where she uses her experience to mentor women in creating this shift for themselves so that they can let go, be present in their bodies, and be bright again. She’s also the host of top-rated sexuality podcast, Any Way You Want It, where loyal fans tune in regularly for her authentic, fresh and edgy conversations about sex, relationships, and life. Through events like her "Slutty Soiree" in Los Angeles, Cailin is committed to creating spaces where women step into having full approval for their divine feminine expression.
To get in touch with Cailin:
- Download the Desire Guide
- Website
- Podcast
- Cocoon
Learn more about what I do as a Women’s Coach and connect with me at my website: https://www.tanaimilgram.com
Follow me on Instagram to continue the conversation and get updates about the podcast: https://www.instagram.com/tanaimilgram
This first season of Commitment Phobe wraps up with my friend Cesar Rodriguez from one of my first episodes, flipping the switch and interviewing me. I talk about what’s going on in my life, my relationships, what I am currently working on in myself and more! We go in pretty deep and it was totally unplanned so this was a little edgy for me and I got to share some really vulnerable, unfiltered truths.
Tune in to get a more vulnerable conversation than my usual episodes as I let Cesar take the reigns of the conversation and ask me whatever he wanted!
Learn more about what I do as a Women’s Coach and connect with me at my website: https://www.tanaimilgram.com
Follow me on Instagram to continue the conversation and get updates about the podcast: https://www.instagram.com/tanaimilgram
How do you create trust in a relationship? What does the person holding the feminine energy need to feel safe? What does the person holding the masculine need to feel safe?
Trust and safety are so crucial for intimacy and connection to thrive in a relationship. A lot of times even when couples feel they’re losing the spark in the relationship, they feel distant from each other or there’s resentment, it’s directly correlated to the lack of safety in the relationship for each person to express their truth and nature.
My guest Jeff Parker Love is a coach, community leader, healer and group facilitator (among other things) that helps people create trust and safety in their relationships so there is attraction, connection and intimacy.
Tune in to listen to how he achieves that in his work, especially in a workshop called Sacred Union that I attended which was a game changer for me!
Jeff is also creating a course for women who feel that they are struggling to find conscious men for partnership.
To find out more about Jeff Parker’s work, his Sacred Union events and be in the loop for when his course comes out, follow him on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/jeffparker.love/
Learn more about what I do as a Women’s Coach and connect with me at my website: https://www.tanaimilgram.com
Follow me on Instagram to continue the conversation and get updates about the podcast: https://www.instagram.com/tanaimilgram
This week tune in to listen to my guests, filmmakers Matthew & Barnaby O’Connor, talk about their newly released documentary ‘The Pickup Game” where they expose the dark reality behind the multimillion-dollar pickup industry, in which male coaches teach men how to succeed with women with different tricks.
Amongst other themes, Matt and Barnaby are committed to spreading the message that intimacy and real happiness can only be found by being honest and authentic in your relationships, even in the initial parts of dating and the pursuit.
In this episode we talk about:-What inspired them to create this documentary and how it all divinely came together.
-Why men get reeled in so easily into the pickup world.
-The impact of men not having mentors or father figures that has them turn to books and the internet for answers.
-What Matt and Barnaby think we should all do as a collective to prevent the dangerous situations shown in the documentary.
-How pickup coaches don’t really look fulfilled yet they make big promises to lots of vulnerable men looking for answers.
-The dangers of manipulation in sales, pickup and advertising.
THE PICKUP GAME is an inside look at the emergence of the ‘pickup’ industry – a world where self-styled seduction coaches travel the globe, charging a small fortune to teach men skills they claim will guarantee success with women.
From the glossy exterior, where courses are packaged as self-improvement, to the dark underbelly of sexual assault, pyramid scheme marketing and secret collusion THE PICKUP GAME pulls back the curtain to reveal a world that is fascinating and horrific in equal measure.
From San Francisco to Tokyo – with epicentres in Toronto, London, and New York – men collectively spend hundreds of millions of dollars to attend seminars, download online courses and have one-on-one coaching sessions with instructors they feel can give them the dating life of their dreams. In the minds of students, many of these instructors become more than just teachers. They become idols.
Check out the documentary on
Learn more about what I do as a Women’s Coach and connect with me at my website: https://www.tanaimilgram.com
Follow me on Instagram to continue the conversation and get updates about the podcast: https://www.instagram.com/tanaimilgram
This week my guest is my wonderful mom and energetic coach and healer Karina Zabner. So much of what I’ve learned about being compassionate with myself, and understanding my feelings, connecting to my body and energy comes from her.
In this episode and last week’s we talk about all the ways that we can take responsibility for ourselves, our energy, our emotions, and the relationships in our lives.
Some things we talk about are: How to set boundaries in relationships, how to communicate our needs, having self-compassion, why people are afraid of relationships, how our family systems affect our current lives and so much more.
This is the kind of episode you’ll want to listen to with a notebook and pen because there is so much gold in it you’ll want to write down!
Karina is the founder of The Awareness Journey Co and the creator of The Art of Awareness, an empowerment process she uses with clients in her private practice, group coaching and workshops as a tool to help them improve their well-being, self-esteem, relationships, and their ability to respond to daily challenges in a more proactive way.
To contact Karina you can reach her on her website or Instagram:
https://www.theawarenessjourneyco.com/
https://www.instagram.com/theawarenessjourneyco/
Learn more about what I do as an Intuitive Coach and connect with me at my website: https://www.tanaimilgram.com
Follow me on Instagram to continue the conversation and get updates about the podcast: https://www.instagram.com/tanaimilgram
This week my guest is my wonderful mom and energetic coach and healer Karina Zabner. So much of what I’ve learned about being compassionate with myself, and understanding my feelings, connecting to my body and energy comes from her.
In the following two episodes we talk about all the ways that we can take responsibility for ourselves, our energy, our emotions, and the relationships in our lives.
Some things we talk about are: How to set boundaries in relationships, how to communicate our needs, having self-compassion, why people are afraid of relationships, how our family systems affect our current lives and so much more.
This is the kind of episode you’ll want to listen to with a notebook and pen because there is so much gold in it you’ll want to write down!
Karina is the founder of The Awareness Journey Co and the creator of The Art of Awareness, an empowerment process she uses with clients in her private practice, group coaching and workshops as a tool to help them improve their well-being, self-esteem, relationships, and their ability to respond to daily challenges in a more proactive way.
To contact Karina you can reach her on her website or Instagram:
https://www.theawarenessjourneyco.com/
https://www.instagram.com/theawarenessjourneyco/
Learn more about what I do as a Women’s Coach and connect with me at my website: https://www.tanaimilgram.com
Follow me on Instagram to continue the conversation and get updates about the podcast: https://www.instagram.com/tanaimilgram
This week my guest and I do a deep dive into something lots of people struggle with: loving men.
In a world where we are trying to deconstruct the patriarchy this seems like a very DIFFERENT message to hear right?Well, as much as women want to date men, they also have a lot of reasons for why they don’t like the entire species, so that creates a lot of blocks in the intimacy of the relationship that women aren’t aware of.
Join my guest Kelly and I as Kelly talks about how she helps women heal their relationships with men, have a more loving relationship with themselves, and surrender in their relationships and sex lives.
Kelly, a former commitment phobe, also shares her personal stories of healing, self-love, and how she presently shows up in her relationship with her boyfriend.
Spoiler alert: Kelly made the first move, and he initially wasn’t sure he wanted a committed relationship!
Kelley Bode is an international intimacy coach based in Bali. She works with women, helping them to have loving relationships, heal their relationships with men, and turn on their sex lives. She does both group and 1:1 coaching. She is also a podcast host on her show called The Best You’ve Ever Had.
Learn more about what I do as a Women’s Coach and connect with me at my website: https://www.tanaimilgram.com
Follow me on Instagram to continue the conversation and get updates about the podcast: https://www.instagram.com/tanaimilgram
Check out part II of this episode!
We’ve been raised in a world that tells us to stop crying, feel better and not feel our feelings. What’s the impact of that? My guest Kara Baruzzini talks about how this leads to us feeling like “there’s a dormant volcano inside of you” and that can lead to explosions in our relationships, or in the case of “commitment phobes,” it can lead to running away.
Kara shares how to use embodiment as a practice to let ourselves feel our feelings, trust ourselves, feel empowered and be able to hold space for others to feel our feelings too.
In a world where we’re used to figuring everything out in our mind, Kara is a magical being who learned how to work on herself through the body first as a yoga and movement instructor. Tune in to listen to how you can connect to your body’s inner wisdom and be with and move through emotions you might be uncomfortable with or think are “wrong.”
Some things we talk about:
-How break ups lead to healing and awakening and self-love.
-How pain is a great motivator to take action in life.
-Kara’s journey as a yoga teacher and embodiment coach.
-How the tantric philosophy changed Kara’s life.
-The magic of “bottom-up” healing and how it’s completely different than what we’ve been taught to do to experience our emotions.
This episode includes a free guided embodiment exercise led by Kara!
Kara Baruzzini is a lightworker relaying ancient wisdom into a modern context. She lives to encourage people to move in the direction of self-healing through embodiment, inner child work, and yoga. Her healing journey has led her to deep dive into Tantric philosophy and has inspired her to share this sacred information through her virtual platform: School of Intuitive Yoga.
Website:
Schoolofintuitiveyoga.com
IG: @kara.makingwaves
Learn more about what I do as an Women’s Coach and connect with me at my website: https://www.tanaimilgram.com
Follow me on Instagram to continue the conversation and get updates about the podcast: https://www.instagram.com/tanaimilgram
We’ve been raised in a world that tells us to stop crying, feel better and not feel our feelings. What’s the impact of that? My guest Kara Baruzzini talks about how this leads to us feeling like “there’s a dormant volcano inside of you” and that can lead to explosions in our relationships, or in the case of “commitment phobes,” it can lead to running away.
Kara shares how to use embodiment as a practice to let ourselves feel our feelings, trust ourselves, feel empowered and be able to hold space for others to feel our feelings too.
In a world where we’re used to figuring everything out in our mind, Kara is a magical being who learned how to work on herself through the body first as a yoga and movement instructor. Tune in to listen to how you can connect to your body’s inner wisdom and be with and move through emotions you might be uncomfortable with or think are “wrong.”
Some things we talk about:
-How break ups lead to healing and awakening and self-love.
-How pain is a great motivator to take action in life.
-Kara’s journey as a yoga teacher and embodiment coach.
-How the tantric philosophy changed Kara’s life.
-The magic of “bottom-up” healing and how it’s completely different than what we’ve been taught to do to experience our emotions.
Kara Baruzzini is a lightworker relaying ancient wisdom into a modern context. She lives to encourage people to move in the direction of self-healing through embodiment, inner child work, and yoga. Her healing journey has led her to deep dive into Tantric philosophy and has inspired her to share this sacred information through her virtual platform: School of Intuitive Yoga.
Website:
Schoolofintuitiveyoga.com
IG: @kara.makingwaves
Learn more about what I do as a Women’s Coach and connect with me at my website: https://www.tanaimilgram.com
Follow me on Instagram to continue the conversation and get updates about the podcast: https://www.instagram.com/tanaimilgram
Seeing the triggers that come up in relationships as opportunities to love yourself is a powerful shift that takes you from being at the effect of your relationships to at the cause of them.
How can you do that?
Tune in to learn a little bit about shadow work, what it means to project all of our shadows on to the people around us and how you can start to become aware of that and use it to stop creating unhealthy patterns within yourself and how you relate to others.
In this episode I talk about:
- Why you get triggered by the things other people do and how they speak more about you then them.
- How relationships are a tool for our own self-love
- How to stop being a victim in your relationships.
- How our triggers can be our teachers.
- How to create your dream relationship with anyone you’re dating.
- Some wise words from Osho and Marianne Williamson about the fear of intimacy.
Learn more about what I do as an Intuitive Coach and connect with me at my website: https://www.tanaimilgram.com
Follow me on Instagram to continue the conversation and get updates about the podcast: https://www.instagram.com/tanaimilgram
What comes to mind when you think of supporting someone going through some sort of pain? Do you think of ways to make them feel better? Do you try to help them fix it? Do you give them advice?
This week my guest Oren Shai blew my mind on what it can mean to really hold space for someone in their triggers/pain by not trying to do any of the above. Instead, we can learn how to feel a deep sense of groundedness within ourselves so we allow others to feel safe and seen being in their trigger without us trying to fix them or make them feel like their pain is wrong.
-How to create safety and connection in relationships through presence and attention.
-What it means to know the different “flavours of triggers” in your body.
-How we outsource our sense of stability to external things and how to start sourcing groundedness within yourself.
-How to give yourself what you need when you get triggered so you can address things in your relationships from a centered place.
-What somatic healing is all about.
Oren is committed to developing the leaders our world needs by connecting inner work and outer impact. Based upon the belief that the greatest challenges we face today result from the illusion of separateness, Oren’s work supports emerging leaders in reuniting separated parts of themselves so they are equipped to be forces for unification in the world.
Practically, this takes the form of somatic leadership coaching, organizational change consulting, and co-creative community building.
Oren brings with him over a decade of experience developing people within companies like LinkedIn, and conducting applied team performance research within universities like Stanford.
Learn more at oren.is
Learn more about what I do as an Intuitive Coach and connect with me at my website: https://www.tanaimilgram.com
Follow me on Instagram to continue the conversation and get updates about the podcast: https://www.instagram.com/tanaimilgram
“What emotion guided you to how you feel? When you hear the emotions attached to it, you become less defensive.”
I’m excited to host Kelbin Ramirez, one of my closest friends from back when I was a student at the University of Florida, whom I hosted a Youtube series with about the restaurants in our college town.
Kelbin was raised in a Nicaraguan-American home in Miami, came out to his parents in his mid-twenties, moved in with his boyfriend shortly after while also climbing up the ladder at work quicker than most people do who work as radio hosts. I was so curious to hear about what his experiences and hear his story of the impact of hiding in his relationships most of his life.
Some things we talk about are:
- The difference it makes to communicate from how you are feeling, and how to do it in a way that’s compassionate.
- What helped him get through the discomfort of coming out to a parent that didn’t fully accept him.
- What he’s learned so far about how to deal with resentments in relationships.
- How he managed impostor syndrome as he climbed up the professional ladder very quickly.
Learn more about what I do as an Intuitive Coach and connect with me at my website: https://www.tanaimilgram.com
Follow me on Instagram to continue the conversation and get updates about the podcast: https://www.instagram.com/tanaimilgram
If you think about it, we all have many coming out stories. We all have moments in our lives where we have to share our deepest truths and show who we really are to the people we love. Ever thought about yours?
My guest Harrison Guy is a gay rights activist and professional dancer that shares with us his experience with the coming out stories we are used to thinking of: telling his friends and families that he is gay. However, there wasn’t just ONE coming out story, every family member and social setting had its own coming out story, and each one impacted his life in a different way.
It was my pleasure to have Harry on my podcast today to hear his story what led him to the many incredible ways he creates environments where he can help others feel the freedom to express themselves the way he felt growing up in an open-minded home and community.
Some of the topics we touch upon are:
-What it was like for him to come out to his family and community.
-How the men in his life shaped his image of a man.
-How he created the nonprofit Urban Souls Dance Company and his vision to create a dance company focused on African-American culture.
-Where he learned about courage and how he inspires others to be courageous.
-Harry’s thoughts on what makes a strong partnership and “relationship goals.”
Harrison Guy is the founder and creative director of the nonprofit Urban Souls Dance Company, a modern company that specializes in exploring African-American culture, heritage and expression. He has also been on the Mayor of Houston’s LGBTQ Advisory board,
Learn more about what I do as an Intuitive Coach and connect with me at my website: https://www.tanaimilgram.com
Follow me on Instagram to continue the conversation and get updates about the podcast: https://www.instagram.com/tanaimilgram
There are countless factors that affect how we show up in our relationships. How we were raised, how we manage our emotions, what our values are, even how we manage our stress.
On this week’s episode I talk to my good friend Ceasar about his personal journey and the lessons he’s learned in order to better himself and his relationships. From healing childhood abuse and learning how to manage his anger and aggression, to having the courage to be his fully self-expressed self man that paints his nails and wears skirts.
Ceasar is a huge believer in the power of breathwork and thinks that having a breathwork practice is crucial to get in touch with ourselves, heal our bodies, regulate our emotions and connect to the present moment. Tune in to listen to how breathwork can change your life and improve your relationships!
Ceasar is an International Wellness Mentor & Advocate. This came to be as he still presently copes and manages his own diagnosed anxiety, depression, and post traumatic stress, and found his calling as an educator and supporter to mental health awareness causes. As a trauma-sensitive Certified Yoga Instructor, Meditation Teacher, and Breathing Techniques Instructor, he specializes in mindful resiliency for trauma recovery and compassion fatigue, and has taught all over the world. He’s served as a guest panelist & speaker at Rutgers and Fordham Universities, numerous corporate events, podcasts, and is an adjunct professor at Columbia University, teaching Meditation/Mindfulness. As a 7-year U.S. Navy Veteran, he also works with the Veterans Yoga Project as an Ambassador and Master Teacher, with experience supporting recovery and resilience of Veterans. He is the creator and founder of www.TheJourneyWithCeasar.com, a subscription-based meditation library and coaching/consulting service center. And in his spare time, Ceasar is also an award-winning singer, dancer, actor, fight and dance choreographer, musical theater talent, and voiceover artist.
Imagine, what would your self-care and solo time look like if you put in the same amount of effort you do when you’re just starting a new relationship you’re excited about, full of hopes and dreams and turn-on?
What if you dressed up for yourself? Got to know yourself deeply? Put your phone down to be with yourself just like you don’t pull it out in a date? Spent a little more on a nice dinner to take YOURSELF out?
I think dating ourselves is a crucial part of loving ourselves and learning what our needs and desires are so we can set the standard for all of the other relationships in our lives. Tune in to listen to how dating myself has had such an impact on my confidence, relationships and self-love and why I created a whole group coaching program around it.
To find out more information about my 8 week program Dating Yourself check the link in the bio of my Instagram. https://www.instagram.com/tanaimilgram
Learn more about what I do as an Intuitive Coach and connect with me at my website: https://www.tanaimilgram.com
Follow me on Instagram to continue the conversation and get updates about the podcast: https://www.instagram.com/tanaimilgram
You know when you know what you want but you feel bad, even shameful about wanting it? My guest today Julia Shepley talks about how not having approval for what we desire is a biiig source of our unhappiness and lack of power! Without total approval how could we ever go after what we want? What can we do to find approval for our desires?
After living a life consumed by shame and fear, Julia shares about the freedom and confidence she got once she approved her wildest desires in her romantic life, sex life and personal life, and how passionate she is to help other womxn experience this liberation and power as a womxn’s coach.
Julia and I talk about:
- The difference between living out of desire vs. obligation
- Julia’s yearning to be sexually expressed and how she found the approval for it
- How to manage your “Rupture” -when you start reconfiguring your life based on desire and realize how much of your life isn’t working for you
- Julia’s resistance to start doing personal work and why
•Her journey with Herpes starting to share that publicly
• Why sex was her “loneliest spot” and how she transformed it to an empowered place. - The danger of a woman not feeling sexually expressed
- How to manifest the kind of partner and relationship you desire
- Her newly found appreciation and love for men
- Masculine and feminine energy dynamics and how to step into the feminine pole
- What she’s learned about what men want from her teachers and how that improved her relationships
Connect with Julia:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/magic__juju/
Work with Julia: https://linktr.ee/magicjuju
Learn more about what I do to help women become more confident with themselves and shed the pressure to be the “good girl” & book a free 15 minute Discovery Call here: https://calendly.com/tanai-milgram/15min?month=2021-01
Follow me on Instagram to continue the conversation and get updates about the podcast: https://www.instagram.com/tanaimilgram
What does it really mean when to be responsible for our own happiness and needs within a relationship? How does one take care of our own needs, aren’t we relational beings that need people?
This week I’ve uploaded an old Instagram Live interview I did in 2020 with one of my favorite speakers and guides Kevin Walton where we talk about just that. Kevin talks about why he thinks we need to stop preaching the idea that we need to tell our partners what we need, because we’re the only ones responsible for taking care of them.
Tune in to learn more about the differences between masculine and feminine energies, how to create clarity in relationships, why we attract the type of relationships and people we attract and more!
Kevin Walton is an expert when it comes to the topic of masculine and femine energies within ourselves and within relationships. Check out his work and find out about how you can work with him through his Instagram account @sourceradiance
Learn more about what I do to help women become more confident with themselves and shed the pressure to be the “good girl” & book a free 15 minute Discovery Call here: https://calendly.com/tanai-milgram/15min?month=2021-01
Follow me on Instagram to continue the conversation and get updates about the podcast: https://www.instagram.com/tanaimilgram
What does it mean to you to have an open heart?
To Jeff Shub, it means more than just sharing love and affection. It also means speaking up when things aren’t working and trusting your body to say whatever is there, even when it’s uncomfortable or ugly.
On today’s episode my very inspirational friend Jeff who helps people live in alignment to their truth, shares the power of dropping into the chaos in and speaking with an open heart to create relationships with more integrity and vulnerability.
Some of the very powerful topics we touch on:
-How men have not been allowed to be themselves or express their feelings.
-the importance of training yourself to hold space for another in partnership
-how working in podiatry led to Jeff’s spiritual awakening and purpose.
-The difference between living a self-focused life vs a life of service.
-What it means to live a barefoot lifestyle.
-Jeff’s upbringing in a Latin Jewish Community and how he’s carved his own path.
-How sharing resentments brings desire and polarity back into a relationship.
-What is the Possibility Management Community Jeff is part of.
To get in touch with Jeff and follow his latest projects, follow him on Instagram: @theurbanbarefoot
Ever feel like you have a parent/child relationship with your romantic partners that kills the intimacy and attraction?
Learning how to recognize the roles you are playing in your relationship can be extremely useful to maintain a healthy and connected relationship. On today’s episode I invite my best friend and business partner Taylor Cohen to dive deep into why we mother our partners, why we play the roles of daughter or son to our partners, and how it all has to do with our fear of letting go of control.
Some of the powerful experiences Taylor shares on this episode are:
-How mothering her past boyfriend killed the intimacy in the relationship.
-Her experience with sexuality growing up in a religious Jewish home and how it led to her sexual awakening.
-What ‘Undaughtering’ is and how it led to her self-expression.
- What it really takes to let go of control in a relationship.
-How our partners are reflections of ourselves and how we can learn from that.
-The power she found in being softer and more vulnerable in her relationships.
Taylor is also a vegan food inventor, and CEO of the lentil based meat alternative Adashah! Together we lead a four month program called Undaughtering to help womxn let go of the pressure of being the perfect daughters, claim their sovereignty and live fully self-expressed.
Learn more about what I do to help women become more confident with themselves and shed the pressure to be the “good girl” & book a free 15 minute Discovery Call here: https://calendly.com/tanai-milgram/15min?month=2021-01
Connect with Taylor to find out more about her journey and her offerings on her Instagram account at @taylor_ocean_cohen
Follow me on Instagram to continue the conversation and get updates about the podcast: https://www.instagram.com/tanaimilgram
What comes up for you when you hear the word commitment?
I bet most of you came up with some associations like “tying down to something,” “choosing one thing and nothing else,” “forever”...
A big reason people have a fear of committing to a partnership or life decisions is because the associations they have with the word commitment feel very limiting and unnatural.
What if we’ve been getting commitment all wrong?
In his personal and professional experience developing accountability systems for entrepreneurs and 1-1 coaching, Kevin Hermann has learned a lot about how to make commitments work for himself and others in a way that actually lights him up instead of making him feel trapped.
Tune into this episode to hear:
-How Kevin brings in playfulness into his relationships to find more satisfaction.
-How to think of commitment in a way that feels good vs. feeling like it’s limiting and threatening.
-The practices Kevin incorporates into his current relationship to “tend the fire” of the relationship.
-Kevin’s own journey becoming more comfortable feeling self-expressed and living his truth.
-The difference between being outcome focused and process focused in relationships and projects.
-How the concept of “falling in love” affects how we enter relationships and the power of reframing it to “rising in love.”
Kevin is currently transitioning to working with youth so they can step up to be leaders of their generation! Follow his journey on his Instagram: @kevin_hermann
To work with me and learn more about what I do to help women become more confident with themselves and shed the pressure to be the “good girl” book a free 15 minute Discovery Call here: https://calendly.com/tanai-milgram/15min?month=2021-01
Follow me on Instagram to continue the conversation and get updates about the podcast: https://www.instagram.com/tanaimilgram
Join me this week as I do a deep dive into the attachment theory with my therapist of 12 years Rosario Garrido. Lately attachment theory is becoming more widely known and I thought it would be helpful to share with others who aren’t familiar with the concept, how much your infancy affects how you form romantic relationships and how you relate to intimacy and commitment.
Rosario is a Marriage and Family Therapist based out of Miami and believes that attachment plays one of the biggest roles in how we create relationships and develop our sense of belonging and intimacy. Tune in to learn all about it!
Learn more about what I do as an Intuitive Coach and connect with me at my website: https://www.tanaimilgram.com
Follow me on Instagram to continue the conversation and get updates about the podcast: https://www.instagram.com/tanaimilgram
What does it really take to build a relationship where two individuals don’t feel like they “complete each other” but instead, are two whole individuals coming together for companionship and intimacy?
My guest today Dr. Hod Tamir, a developmental psychologist and licensed mental health counselor has dedicated much of his career answering questions like this one to help emerging and middle aged adults have more satisfaction in their romantic and personal relationships. I was pleasantly surprised to hear that he feels optimistic about younger generations making progress in how they show up in relationships with more open communication, healthy boundaries and a greater possibility for what he calls “interdependence.” Tune in and hear Hod’s standpoint as a psychologist on intimacy-related anxiety, how we can create healthier relationships, what he’s learned from studying ultra-orthodox Jewish communities, and the Social Network Theory.
Other questions Hod tackles on this podcast:
- Are we expecting way too much from a single partner? •How does dating in your teen years affect how you relate in romantic relationships as an adult?
- Is the attachment style theory really enough to explain how someone behaves in a romantic relationship?
- How does the way we face challenges in relationships matter more than personality compatibility?
Dr. Hod Tamir is the founder of the Wisr Place a clinical practice centered on Wellbeing, Identity, Sexuality, and Relationships. To find out more about how you can work with Hod check out https://www.thewisrplace.com/
To work with me and learn more about what I do to help women become more confident with themselves and shed the pressure to be the “good girl” book a free 15 minute Discovery Call here: https://calendly.com/tanai-milgram/15min?month=2021-01
Follow me on Instagram to continue the conversation and get updates about the podcast: https://www.instagram.com/tanaimilgram
Ever see similarities between how you relate with your partner and your parents? You know that saying about how we’re attracted to someone that reminds us of our mom or dad?
Regardless of the kind of relationship you had with your parents, our relationship with our parents or caregivers shapes a big part of our identity and how we relate to others, especially in the ways we tried to please them. The aspects of ourselves that we suppressed to please our parents are mostly what we don’t allow ourselves to share with our partners.
In our conversation today, my guest and close friend Julian Castro talks about his journey becoming more comfortable with intimacy and how he realized his relationship with his mom and the expectation she had of him growing up affected his romantic relationships. Julian talks about his journey towards being comfortable being vulnerable with his family, friends and partners ,and how the freedom to be himself and overcome fears of rejection and abandonment played a big role.
Some of the topics we cover today are:
* What fear of intimacy looks like not just in a relationship but with friends and family.
* How Julian realized that the “nice guy syndrome” and pressure to please women sabotaged his ability to be intimate with others.
* -The power of choosing your singlehood and facing loneliness vs saying yes to any partnership to fix loneliness.
* How Julian overcomes his fears of rejection and judgement every time he shares his art with the world.
* The very common sources of sexual shame among men that nobody talks about.
* How speaking your truth and talking about the “taboo” increases intimacy in relationships.
* Masculine and feminine dynamics in relationships.
Julian Castro is an artist and the founder of Joule Studios.
Follow Julian on Instagram: https://instagram.com/julian_creates?igshid=1lta4wootrss
Learn more about what I do as an Intuitive Coach and connect with me at my website: https://www.tanaimilgram.com
Follow me on Instagram to continue the conversation and get updates about the podcast: https://www.instagram.com/tanaimilgram
How does your connection to the Divine influence your ability to feel love? My guest today, Dr. Leonor Murciano-Luna is a powerful spiritual healer, holistic doctor and teacher that I’ve personally worked with. Leonor teaches women how to connect to love, bliss and their inner wisdom by helping them empower themselves as they change the collective story of the Feminine within themselves and the planet. Join us as we talk about how to release fear by connecting to our natural divine state of love that we’ve been conditioned not to trust as women living in a Patriarchal society.
Some things we touch upon:
- How physical symptoms are the way our body communicates with us and asking for love.
- Looking at the body as an expression of the relationship you have with your spiritual nature.
- The state of happiness, health and how you feel in your Feminine Body is linked with your spirituality.
- Leonor’s NDE and how it led her to her spiritual awakening.
- How connecting to the feminine allows you to embody and feel love.
- How the patriarchy has shaped our external search of validation.
- Facing the unknown is a crucial element of overcoming any fears.
- The importance of taking responsibility from your emotions and realizing no one else is responsible for them.
- The origin of first world feminine disorders such as UTIs and menstrual pains.
Dr. Leonor Murciano-Luna, PhD, IMD, AP is an author, spiritual healer & teacher, artist, holistic doctor and acupuncture physician.
You can read more about Dr.Leonor Murciano-Luna and contact her through her website https://consciousfemininemedicine.com/
Learn more about what I do as an Intuitive Coach and connect with me at my website: https://www.tanaimilgram.com
Follow me on Instagram to continue the conversation and get updates about the podcast: https://www.instagram.com/tanaimilgram
Working with a coach through something sex-related can be scary — or even feel taboo. But, it doesn’t have to be! Our guest this week, sensuality coach Carli Jo, is getting real with some amazing advice to conquer fear and empower you to have the passionate and fulfilling sex life you’ve always wanted. On this episode, we’re diving into the misconceptions of sexuality, the emotional (and pleasurable!) connections to your body, and everything YOU need to know to trust yourself and own your pleasure!
We’re exploring:
-
The shadow aspect of sex that people fear
-
Why Carli Jo believes sexuality is the basis of EVERYTHING
- Acknowledging the resistance to self-pleasure and sexuality
- How to turn your emotions into orgasmic release (and have FUN healing through pleasure!)
- Why you don’t have to be afraid to walk the fine line between pain and pleasure
- What pleasure means to Carli Jo
- The origins of the secretive nature of self-pleasure
- Why you need to know YOUR anatomy through your OWN discovery
- Our TOP TIPS to empower your safety and trust in yourself
- And so much more!
Connect with Carli Jo on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cannabissensualitycoach/
Have a FREE 20 minute one-on-one conversation with Carli Jo: https://www.carlijo.com/20-2/
Learn more about what I do as an intuitive coach and connect with me at my website: https://www.tanaimilgram.com
Follow me on Instagram to continue the conversation and get updates about the podcast: https://www.instagram.com/tanaimilgram
Did you know a breakup can be the BEST thing that has happened to you? Our guest this week, breakup coach Paige Wilhide, helps men and women navigate their unique breakup journeys to help them heal and learn from their experiences. She wants to remove the stigma around breaking up, and create a new narrative about why it is empowering, instead. On this episode, she’s sharing her thoughts on the importance of slowing down in relationships, how you can use a breakup as a personal growth opportunity, and answers all the questions you might be wondering about when & why you should be considering a breakup.
We’re diving into:
- The wake-up call moments that led Paige on her personal development journey
- Why you NEED to slow down and feel your feelings in relationships
- How you can use a breakup as an opportunity to learn and be empowered
- A powerful lesson about acceptance and responsibility in relationships
- Paige answers the question, “Is there a right time to breakup?”
- Why there’s no shame in taking a “break”
- 4 things you can do to determine if you should breakup or not
- How you can reframe your breakup as a rebirth
- The MOST IMPORTANT lesson you can learn from any breakup
- And so much more!
Learn more about Paige Wilhide as a breakup coach on her Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/breakupbreakthrough/
Learn more about what I do as an intuitive coach and connect with me at my website: https://www.tanaimilgram.com
Follow me on Instagram to continue the conversation and get updates about the podcast: https://www.instagram.com/tanaimilgram
If you’ve ever run away from a relationship because things got a little imperfect (or uncomfortable,) then this episode is for you! This week I’m talking with Cesar Rodriguez, an entrepreneur, blogger, and podcaster behind Love Is Our Nature — an open space for challenging conventional philosophies of love & life. He’s breaking down the barriers and sharing his male perspective on why we seek a “perfect” relationship to validate our existence, but leave no space for the imperfect humanness to inevitably show up. We’re digging deeper into the origins of the qualities we seek in our partners and why you MUST make space for humanity over perfection in order to have the relationship of YOUR dreams.
You’ll hear more about:
- Cesar reflects on his experiences as a commitment phobe
- Why you pursue validation through your relationships, and how this reflects your childhood experiences
- We debunk a common misconception about men and rejection
- Why the pursuit of the “perfect” partner brings fear when conflict arises
- The importance of making room for humanity, flaws, and vulnerability in your relationships
- How societal norms of masculinity influence men’s ability to be REAL with their partner
- Cesar shares his enlightening experiences with plant medicine — and how it helped him get in touch with his heart
- My #1 reason you should detach your energy and slow down your relationships
- Cesar's TOP 2 things you can do in a relationship to be fully self-expressed
- And much more!
Keep in touch with Cesar!
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/loveisournature_
Website: https://www.loveisournature.com
Podcast: https://www.loveisournature.com/podcast
Email: Cesar@loveisournature.com
Learn more about what I do as an Intuitive Coach and connect with me at my website: https://www.tanaimilgram.com
Follow me on Instagram to continue the conversation and get updates about the podcast: https://www.instagram.com/tanaimilgram
When you’re in a relationship, opening up about your intimate desires can be scary — but it doesn’t have to be! If you feel the fear of rejection is interfering with your ability to be emotionally vulnerable with your partner, then it’s time to ask yourself “What DO I want? What would turn ME on?” to start the journey to discover self-love and trust your emotions so you can have the fulfilling relationships of your dreams.
On this episode, I have the pleasure of talking with my former life and intimacy coach and host of the podcast With Pleasure, Aimee Batuski. She’s dedicated to helping womxn have pleasurable sex and satisfying lives by creating deeply intimate connections. Aimee’s POWERFUL advice will give you the freedom to express yourself through your emotions, desires, and truths to develop the confidence to ask for what YOU want in relationships!
We’re diving into:
- Why getting to the truth of what YOU desire will guide you to have thriving relationships
- Comparing the masculine versus feminine energy perspective, and why the feminine can be hardest to embrace
- Aimee gets personal with a relationship story that helped her AWAKEN her sexuality, discover the feminine, and trust her desires
- These AMAZING tips will help you ask for what you want in your relationships (and get it!)
- Why Aimee believes the ONE thing is most important to own and express your desires with your partner
- This KEY thing is impacting why you blame others when you don’t think you’re getting what you want (and how you can change your mindset to have the relationships you desire!)
- What you MUST do to free your emotions, embrace pleasure, and allow your partner to see the real YOU!
- Simple steps to take personal responsibility of your jealousy and turn it into something sexually satisfying
- Why Aimee thinks ALL relationships should be considered “practice”, and how it can help you build the confidence to express your desires in the future
- And so much more!
Follow Aimee on Instagram: https://instagram.com/aimeebatuski
Connect with Aimee through her website: https://www.aimeebatuski.com
If you are interested in more of Aimee’s relationship tools or upcoming programs and retreats, then follow Desire on Fire on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desireonfire
Learn more about what I do as an Intuitive Coach and connect with me at my website: https://www.tanaimilgram.com
Connect with me on Instagram to continue the conversation and get updates about the podcast: https://www.instagram.com/tanaimilgram
Honest and open communication in a relationship can be a struggle (especially if you or your partner are coping with commitment phobia) but it’s not impossible! YOU have the power to break the patterns in your life that keep you from fully committing to relationships by communicating freely and honestly with your partner. Join me for this episode as I explore why self-expression is KEY in creating meaningful, open, and loving relationships that last (even if you break up!) and what you can do to gain the confidence to free your voice.
I’m diving into:
- Why you must be clear in understanding and communicating YOUR definition of “commitment” in a relationship
- My experience growing up in a family dynamic where I felt I couldn’t express myself and be heard, and how it affected my ability to communicate with men later on
- How to honor your truths and speak your mind - because you ARE worthy of being listened to!
- What is REALLY going on when someone isn’t openly communicating about their inability to commit (and why it’s not your fault!)
- Why you can’t wait for “the one” to finally be open and communicate your truths (and what you should be practicing instead)
- These TOP TIPS will help you shine light on the parts of yourself you hide so you can feel confident and safe sharing your thoughts with others
- I share a personal relationship story where my inability to communicate honestly led me to judge and lie to my partner
- What you can do to communicate YOUR needs honestly to improve your confidence, respect your partner, and stop the cycle of fear of commitment
- Why there’s NO threat of being stuck in a relationship if you are honoring your truths and expressing yourself freely
- And much more!
Do you feel desperate to be in a relationship and be vulnerable and intimate with someone but at the same time when someone starts wanting a committed relationship with you, you feel terrified and trapped?
Yeah? I’ve been there, too.
Don’t let fear or anxiety sabotage your opportunity to make an intimate connection! Join me in this very first episode of the Commitment Phobe podcast as I share my journey as a “commitment phobe,” how it became a huge part of my identity and inspired a big part of shifts in life and business.
I’m so excited for you to join me as I share everything I’ve learned over the past 10 years, what it REALLY comes down to at the end of the day when we’re talking about commitment phobia, and what to focus on so that you can start letting in someone else’s love and creating the truly committed and vulnerable relationships you desire.
I’m diving into:
- 2 spoilers about commitment phobia
- The recurrent relationship patterns I found myself falling into, and how I’m breaking the cycle
- A better understanding of why you or someone you love can’t commit or be vulnerable with a partner
- What’s REALLY going on when someone can’t create a committed relationship with someone else
- My FAVORITE advice for commitment phobes to break the cycle of fear and anxiety and start loving every part of yourself
- And much more!
Connect with me on Instagram to continue the conversation: https://www.instagram.com/tanaimilgram