Delivering Miracles®: Recent Episodes
Parijat Deshpande is a high risk pregnancy expert who provides support for
Parijat Deshpande, high-risk pregnancy expert, clinically trained therapist and former high-risk mom, explores the real, raw side of family building. From getting infertility, high-risk pregnancy, bed rest and prematurity to healing after baby comes home, the Delivering Miracles® Podcast with Parijat is an entertaining, inspirational, informative show that gives you the tools to have a healthy pregnancy so you can give your baby a strong start to life.
With the technology boom, patients and clients now have access to the same information as medical professionals. As beneficial as technology can be, the drawback is that we find conflicting messages that don’t help us when we are scared and overwhelmed with caring for our child. Join me for this final episode of the Delivering Miracles podcast as we discuss stress, the nervous system, and the necessity of rest and repair.
Show Highlights:
- A quote on social media about stress and infertility--and why it makes my blood boil [4:50]
- Stress is a set of physiological chain reactions when your brain and nervous system perceive a threat [8:20]
- We are far more stressed out than our ancestors were, and we stay in survival mode without opportunities for the necessary rest and repair [14:05]
- The whole point of the body’s stress response system is to keep you alive [18:50]
- Stress doesn’t cause infertility, but it is a huge piece of the puzzle [28:11]
- Delivering Miracles, Episode 1, began with The Power of Fear [31:51]
- I want to end the podcast by emphasizing The Power of YOU [32:38]
- When we get in rest and repair mode, our body starts to work again [35:07]
- This is not goodbye; there is still much work to be done in spreading the message to empower and inspire women! [39:11]
- Final words of hope: “The very body that feels broken is the very body that holds the key to the power of your health and healing. It’s right there. Reach out and claim it.” [44:24]
Resources:
www.parijetdeshpande.com/deliveringmiracles
Work With Me: http://bit.ly/wwmdmep136
Modern Approach to Grief & Trauma Release Free Webinar http://bit.ly/modappweb
Why Nervous System Regulation is Essential for Optimal Pregnancy and Postpartum Health: http://bit.ly/dmep134
The Power of Fear: http://bit.ly/dmep001
Statistics show that approximately 6% of women experience anxiety during pregnancy, but I suspect that the percentage is actually much higher than that. This episode covers pregnancy anxiety, which is something I see a lot in my practice. Many women have questions about this topic, especially since it’s something that is frequently waved off and disregarded by healthcare providers. It’s a topic that’s close to my heart because I see a lot of outdated tools and techniques touted as the solution. The truth is that your physical body holds the key. Let’s jump into pregnancy anxiety together!
Parenting after loss is a topic that comes up frequently in the Delivering Miracles community. People ask what they should do and how they should go on loving the child they have while still feeling the previous loss. This unique kind of grief presents a conundrum in how to handle the intricacies of parenting, and societal pressure certainly plays into how we THINK we should feel. There is most definitely not just ONE right way to navigate this grief into your role as a parent, but there are principles to follow to get through the basics of grief and loss. Let’s talk about it.
Show Highlights:
- Talking about loss brings up many issues around grief, which is a topic that our society doesn’t know how to approach [1:23]
- Are you STUCK in grief if you find it difficult to move on? [4:28]
- Your grief doesn’t disappear with another pregnancy or another baby [8:16]
- If you don’t release the grief, it sits in the body and freezes your nervous system [10:09]
- When you are parenting through grief, it is the time to call on your support group for help [20:33]
- Allow your body to do what it needs to do to feel the grief and then release it [25:50]
- Know your grief triggers and avoid them until you know you can allow the waves of grief to complete [27:54]
- Your grief experience is a great learning opportunity for your children to develop emotional intelligence and empathy (Don’t shield them from grief!) [30:13]
- There is no ONE right way to honor your lost baby, but you must address the underlying fear and do what brings you a sense of peace [33:09]
- Your grief can teach your children about the nuances of life; it’s YOUR choice how to let them experience grief [40:32]
- You don’t have to figure it all out right now, but you have to lead with what brings you peace, so just start there [43:59]
- When you’ve experienced a loss and have anxiety about losing your living children, this is trauma encoded in your body [45:33]
- The key is to thaw your nervous system and let the waves of grief come--then you’ll find peace [47:14]
- When we do the healing work, we heal the whole family, so make your healing a priority [50:21]
- You WILL heal, which means remembering those babies without pain and with choice [51:54]
Resources:
Modern Approach to Grief & Trauma Release Free Webinar http://bit.ly/modappweb
Healing from Grief - http://bit.ly/dmep128
Coping with the loss of a child - http://bit.ly/013dm
Join us in Healing Hearts http://bit.ly/healheartblog
I’m asked frequently why I like to focus on bodywork and nervous system regulation. The simple answer is that I want to know (and I want you to know) not just how to cope, but how to not be affected by the anxiety that comes with life. When you’re affected by trauma, the truth is that not everything gets better with time. Many people misunderstand nervous system regulation, so let’s talk about how this works and how this information can help you in the long run.
Show Highlights:
- The truth is that time does NOT heal all wounds [3:57]
- My goal is to counter the false beliefs that women are made to believe [6:24]
- How the nervous system is the connection between all other systems in the body [6:55]
- Why nervous system regulation is necessary in addition to all the other things you’re trying [16:40]
- Body-based work is based on recent research and the understanding of neurobiology regarding stress [18:55]
- How the things that are possible when you regulate your nervous system feel “like magic” [21:28[
- Don’t stop at just coping, but learn to harness the power of your body to relieve the symptoms you have [23:59]
- Nervous system regulation: what it is and what it isn’t [24:23]
- Being able to regulate your nervous system is especially important in going through infertility, high-risk pregnancy, and preterm delivery [28:22]
- Getting started with nervous system regulation means having an awareness of being in your body [33:10]
- Biologically, when we have nervous system dysregulation, we cut off what we’re feeling inside [36:40]
- We can teach our nervous system to handle stress by being aware of our sensations, being present with them, and allowing them to dissipate [38:35]
Resources:
Modern Approach to Grief & Trauma Release Free Webinar http://bit.ly/modappweb
How the Mind-Body Connection Can Help You Stay Pregnant (a client story) - http://bit.ly/rimahrp
Join us in Healing Hearts http://bit.ly/healheartblog
Work with Me: http://bit.ly/wwmbloghrp
The topic of trauma has hit home for me and our DM community. Stress, anxiety, and maternal mental health issues all have their roots in unresolved trauma. Trauma is simply a nervous system frozen in a state of danger, and it’s not tied to a specific event, but in how that event is encoded in your body. Let’s dive deeper!
Show Highlights:
- Why it’s easy to minimize trauma, which has nothing to do with what you went through; it’s a nervous system frozen in a state of danger (1:12)
- The crux of the trauma problem: When the nervous system is stuck, we cannot make conscious choices until it’s unfrozen (7:50)
- Three stages of how we function when an event has been encoded as trauma: (12:15)
-
- Survival
- Coping
- Thriving
- Your body can’t heal if it doesn’t feel safe, which is the key to reclaiming life and health (19:10)
- We have to make changes in order to unfreeze our nervous system (25:54)
- You deserve healing! ((30:50)
- Questions from event participants about therapist training, Healing Hearts membership, coping and trying again, and more (32:14)
Resources:
5 Myths About Trauma http://bit.ly/5traumamyths
Modern Approach to Grief & Trauma Release Free Webinar http://bit.ly/modappweb
Join us in Healing Hearts http://bit.ly/healheartblog
This is the episode I didn’t want to do. I tried to avoid it, but I can’t. My feelings are prompted by what I’ve seen on social media posts and articles--and those have left an awful taste in my mouth. We have an epidemic in the US of healthcare providers not listening to women when they complain about their pain and what’s going on in their lives. People don’t listen, and they don’t trust what women say, but then they wonder why all these women’s health issues keep cropping up in spite of our advanced technology. I’m angry--and you should be, too. Let’s talk about it.
In this episode:
- 99% of my clients have experienced being silenced, being ignored, or medical errors being made because they were not believed.
- In advocating for evidence-based solutions to women’s health issues, we can’t ignore the fact that every person’s body and experiences are different.
- We are only able to trust our instincts when we’re able to regulate our nervous system in scary situations.
- Regardless of your age, career, education, social status, or finances, YOU are the only expert on your body.
- Statistics are just big-picture guidelines, so you need to lead with your body and what it is telling you.
In women’s health, providers understand the clinical side of data but ignore the lived-in experiences of women. We need more research, but your lived-in experiences matter way more than any study. Find a provider who respects your experiences and will let YOU lead.
Resources:
What Should I Ask My Doctor (free guide)--http://bit.ly/whattoaskdr
How to Get a Reliable Second Opinion--http://bit.ly/003dmep
5 Signs You Need a New OB--http://bit.ly/neednewOB
How to Be an Empowered Patient--http://bit.ly/dm022ep
5 Myths About Trauma--http://bit.ly/5traumamyths
Modern Approach to Grief & Trauma Release (free webinar)--http://bit.ly/modappweb
Schedule a Strategy Session--http://bit.ly/healthstratsess
Do you feel that you deserve to heal and feel better on your fertility journey? Do you feel like you deserve to be a mother and experience a healthier pregnancy? Do you feel like you deserve to grieve your losses and bring a baby home from the hospital? Of course, we say that we deserve these things, but the problem is that we battle an underlying feeling of unworthiness.
In this episode:
- The qualifications we use to call ourselves “infertile” [3:20]
- How we, as women, allow everyone else’s needs to be more important than our own [12:20]
- When we don’t feel validated in our experience, we tend to look for validation from other people [17:00]
- Why we feel like we deserve the “bad things,” but don’t deserve healing and support [24:16]
- You don’t need to try to “figure out” if your pain is justified as compared with someone else’s [27:29]
You shouldn’t have to fight for the ability to grieve, honor your story, and heal. You ARE worth it, and you deserve to heal from grief and trauma. When was the last time you told yourself that?
Resources:
Modern Approach to Grief & Trauma Release (Free Webinar)- http://bit.ly/modappweb
Schedule a consultation - http://bit.ly/healthstratsess
Join us in Healing Hearts - http://bit.ly/healheartdirect
November is Prematurity Awareness Month, so it’s a good time for us to discuss the basics. In today’s show, we’re talking about risk factors for preterm delivery and other information you need to know about this frightening experience.
In this episode:
- Prematurity is the leading cause of death for children under five across the world---and the rate in the US keeps rising. [1:47]
- A history of preterm delivery is the #1 risk factor for another preterm delivery. [6:51]
- Many medical conditions and lifestyle habits can increase the chances of preterm delivery. [21:27]
- Conditions associated with stress can contribute to risk factors. [23:09]
- What you need to know about the four levels of the NICU--and what to expect with each one. [33:14]
You need to be well-informed about the risk factors for preterm delivery, red flags to look for, who you need on your team, and how to prepare yourself.
Resources:
What Should I Ask My Doctor (free guide) - bit.ly/whattoaskdr
What Every Woman Needs to Know About Pelvic Floor Health with Catherine Middlebrooks - http://bit.ly/dmep117
5 Myths About Trauma http://bit.ly/5traumamyths
Modern Approach to Grief & Trauma Release Free Webinar http://bit.ly/modappweb
Schedule a consultation - http://bit.ly/healthstratsess
I love to hear from you! I love to address your questions and concerns with Listener Q & A episodes, like today’s show. Join us as we cover several topics that are relevant to birth trauma, preemie development, postpartum depression, and the work of healing.
In this episode:
- Dealing with the uncertainty of the development of a preemie when you aren’t sure what to expect [2:24]
- Experiencing postpartum depression with stillbirth, miscarriage, or ectopic pregnancy [15:48]
- Getting over the fear of a medical termination when you’ve gone through this before [25:33]
- How (and to what degree) diet can help with postpartum depression [40:08]
- The reality of full healing from birth trauma vs. “learning to cope” [51:00]
- Healing work is lifelong work that requires an ongoing commitment [55:26]
*You CAN let go of birth trauma without knowing the outcome. Peace is not elusive for you. You can find peace NOW, even when the future is uncertain. Nervous system regulation is the missing piece that you need!
Resources:
5 Myths About Trauma http://bit.ly/5traumamyths
The Truth About Fertility Trauma http://bit.ly/dmep125
Relieving Trauma-Induced Health Complications Workshop http://bit.ly/traumahealthcomp
When It's Not a Diet Issue but Unresolved Trauma https://www.instagram.com/p/B37gSK2BDH_/
Modern Approach to Grief & Trauma Release Free Webinar http://bit.ly/modappweb
What Should I Ask My Doctor? a free guide bit.ly/whattoaskdr
Real Food for Pregnancy by Lily Nichols https://amzn.to/2JoCz0X
There are many nuances to grief. The loss of a child is extremely painful grief, but you have to trust that your body knows how to heal itself. It’s important that you reach out for support when you need professional guidance. Let’s jump into this difficult topic together.
In this episode:
- We don’t speak accurately enough about the experience of pregnancy loss and saying goodbye to a life lost too soon. [9:28]
- Grief hurts and feels awful. [11:00]
- Our body has a built-in system that knows how to heal from grief. [19:55]
- There are no stages of grief. [25:07]
- Your job is to keep your body tension-free and tightness-free. [34:15]
Grief is not a pathological condition. There is no treatment for it. You’re not broken for mourning the loss of your baby, so take all the time you need.
Resources:
www.parijatdeshpande.com/healinghearts
http://bit.ly/healheartdirect
One of the most interesting aspects of my work in working with a wide variety of people is that every experience is so different, even if they share the same starting point. Having a baby in the NICU is a different type of trauma that shifts what you understand to be normal. It shifts everything you know to be normal and everything you expect to encounter in the way you enter parenthood. The good news is that you CAN find yourself again and return to “normal”! Let’s talk about how to do it.
September is NICU Awareness Month. If you aren’t familiar with what NICU stands for, it’s where sick or pre-term babies go for specialized care until they are well enough to (hopefully) go home. One of the most common questions I get from parents is about facing another pregnancy after going through a NICU experience. Just the thought of a repeat situation is terrifying for a parent. Today’s show dives into four important steps to take before trying to conceive again after a NICU experience.
Episode Highlights:
- Talk to your partner
-
- Sometimes partners don’t feel included in the NICU experience
- Get your partner’s perspective and understand their feelings
- Make sure your partner isn’t stuck in the trauma response
- Realize that social support is essential for healthy pregnancy outcomes
- Work with a trauma-trained therapist if you need to
- Make a preconception appointment with a high-risk specialist
-
- Get a second opinion on what happened before and how to prevent it
- Get your questions answered before you try again
- Realize that this isn’t a one-time appointment, but may need to be repeated
- Think of this as selecting your team
- Deactivate your arousal system (turn off your stress response)
-
- Understand that none of this is your fault
- Know that a heightened stress response increases the chance of many pregnancy complications
- Look out for unresolved grief and trauma
- Know that mantras, affirmations, and positive thinking will NOT help
- Figure out when the time is right for you
-
- Don’t allow a medical professional to push you when you aren’t ready
- What can you make better right now?
- Realize that there is no right or wrong answer
- Trust your body; it won’t lie to you
Resources:
How to Get a Reliable /Second Opinion - http://bit.ly/003dmep
What Should I Ask My Doctor Free Guide - bit.ly/whattoaskdr
Get More Answers 30-Day Health Advocacy Program - bit.ly/getmoreanswers
Path to Baby: a 1:1 Mind-Body Program to Prepare Your Body for Pregnancy - http://bit.ly/pathtobabydm
Find me on Instagram: @healthy.highriskpregnancy
Fertility trauma is happening all around us. It’s a huge part of the journey when you’re trying to conceive. Today’s show discusses why we have to address this issue and why trauma resolution should be part of fertility treatment for everyone.
Episode Highlights:
- What is fertility trauma?
- Why trauma is NOT always based on a single event
- Examples of when and how fertility trauma may occur
- Why fertility trauma is not a mental health issue, but a physiological problem
- Health issues and inflammation that come when we don’t “come back down” from our body’s stress response
- Why you need to understand the physiology of what your body does---and how you can help it
- How trauma resolution can “stack the deck in your favor”
- Why stress is NOT the cause of infertility
- Why my clients are having fertility success when they put the puzzle pieces together
- Retraining your body with breath work, progressive relaxation, stretching, and dropping your shoulders
- The resulting changes that happen to the nervous, immune, and endocrine systems---all of which play a vital part in getting pregnant
Resources:
Optimize Your Fertility: http://bit.ly/optfertdm
Path to Baby: http://bit.ly/pathtobabydm
Instagram: healthy.highriskpregnancy
I’ve talked to many women from many backgrounds with many complications. These women are all tied together by experiencing trauma on their family-building journey. The fact that unresolved trauma is a stress trigger fascinates me, and it led to my pursuit of training as a trauma specialist. Today’s show explores the question: What if the issues we see in maternal mental health are just results of unresolved trauma? We’re talking about common myths we hear regarding trauma healing and refuting them with truth.
Episode Highlights:
- 5 Myths of Trauma Healing:
-
- You can only experience trauma after a life-threatening event
-
- Trauma occurs when the stress response is turned on and amped up without the opportunity to “come back down”
- Trauma is a life sentence, and it will be this way forever
-
- When we believe this myth, we forget the healing power of the human body
- Time heals all wounds
-
- The truth is that healing takes active participation
- PTSD is a disorder
-
- Post-traumatic stress is an injury and a wound
- You have to tell your story in order to heal
-
- Telling your story before you’re healed will lead to retraumatization
- The key to healing: You have to create the release, however that looks for you; relax your body and turn off the stress response
Resources:
www.parijatdeshpande.com/healinghearts
Find me on Instagram: healthy@highriskpregnancy
Some time ago, I came across a video on Facebook in which a pediatrician was showing a hold that soothes a crying newborn. One time when my daughter was crying, and nothing seemed to help, I remembered the instructional video and gave it a try. I was amazed at the results and became an instant believer in “The Hamilton Hold.” I wondered how I could spread this message that I believe every parent needs to hear, so I’m thrilled to introduce you to today’s guest!
Dr. Robert Hamilton has written 7 Secrets of the Newborn: Secrets and (Happy) Surprises of the First Year, and has over three decades’ experience as a pediatrician. He’s the owner and founder of Pacific Ocean Pediatrics, established in 1996 in Santa Monica, CA. He is the creator of The Hamilton Hold, a method for soothing crying babies that has been seen over 30 million times on YouTube. In addition, Dr. Bob runs the LA marathon annually to support his medical mission organization which has been making annual trips to Africa and Central America for over 20 years. He’s also the proud father of six and grandpa to eight little ones. Dr. Bob lives in Santa Monica with his high school sweetheart, Leslie, to whom he has been married for 45 years.
Why does saying NO feel so hard to do sometimes? The reason is that we want to be people-pleasers, well-liked, and the one who says YES to everything, but that’s just not possible in every situation. When I was on bed rest, I had to learn to say NO to many events and activities, and I felt like a terrible person. Maybe this is a lesson you’ve had to learn the hard way, too. Let’s dive into the subject with today’s guest!
Brigid Dineen is here to teach us about her superpower: how to say NO without feeling like a jerk. Known for her deep empathy and grounded approach to personal growth, she is a resilience coach for strong women. Brigid teaches women how to say NO without feeling guilty, so they can reclaim their time, energy, and peace of mind. As the creator of Breathing Room and Mindfulness for Busy People, she provides practical tools and strategies for self-care. Brigid also hosts the podcast, Guts and Grace, which teaches how to create space for yourself in a world that would rather you stay small.
Body image issues are common for girls during the adolescent and teen years, but do things improve at all for women in the postpartum? It’s exhausting and demoralizing to compare yourself to what you see on TV and in magazines--and know that your body does NOT look like what you see. It’s time for us to have real conversations about what our bodies look like after giving birth.
Rebecca Scritchfield is an award-winning “health at every size” dietitian and exercise physiologist. She’s the author of Body Kindness: Never Say Diet Again and host of The Body Kindness podcast. Rebecca has a free anti-diet, get started course, and she provides one-on-one counseling, virtual support groups, workshops, e-courses, and more.
The journey to becoming a parent may bring fertility challenges, stress, and fear of the unknown. One aspect of parenthood that we don’t give much thought and attention to is the fact that bringing a baby into your family puts stress on your relationship. Many changes take place, but your marriage can survive and thrive. Today’s show is about how to strengthen your relationship so you can get through the transition together.
It’s another one of “those things” that no one tells you. After a high-risk pregnancy, difficult delivery, or lengthy NICU stay, the stress on your body creates the perfect environment for health problems and chronic illnesses. With everything else a new mom has to deal with after these difficulties, now she’s dealing with a mysterious illness! Many women have had this experience, which is insane, but probably more common than you think. Today’s guest shares her message of empowerment over the guilt, grief, and anger.
Jen Hardy is an avid collector of eclectic diseases and mystifier of physicians! She’s an author, podcast host, and speaker who is married to her “Knight in Shining Armor” and is the mom to 7 children. Jen spent over two decades perfecting the art of managing a home while dealing with chronic illnesses, and she’s here to share what she’s learned.
Stress and anxiety can cause digestive issues for many of us, including pregnant women and women going through infertility. Let’s look at the nuts and bolts of nutrition and digestion with today’s guest.
Jess Cording is an expert on stress, digestion, nutrition, and how what goes on in your belly can affect your ability to conceive. Jess is a registered dietitian, health coach, and writer with a passion for helping people streamline their wellness routine and establish a balanced relationship with food and exercise. Through her writing, consulting, public speaking, and counseling, she works with individuals, corporations, and the media to help make drama-free healthy living approachable and enjoyable.
We all know that the postpartum period brings challenges in physical recovery, but one issue you may not be aware of is pelvic floor health. It’s something that’s rarely mentioned by doctors, yet it can lead to lifelong health problems if it’s neglected. Let’s dive in with today’s guest!
Catherine Middlebrooks is a yoga teacher and postpartum corrective exercise specialist. She’s also a wife, mom, and founder of Brb yoga and the Heal Your Core with Yoga program. With the mind of a researcher and the heart of a yogi, Catherine geeks out on the science behind corrective exercise and helping moms like you restore your core strength so you can say YES to life again. She is currently taking yoga on the road, traveling the US in an RV with her husband, Paul, and their two young children.
Many acronyms that come along with learning the new language of infertility and high-risk pregnancy. One experience that not many go through is PPROM, preterm premature rupture of membranes. We’re hearing a story of success and triumph over PPROM from today’s guest.
Abbe Turman is a full-time working mother of three and author of the lifestyle blog, Abigailius, which focuses on design, home organization, and living life with intention. Having experienced both an uncomplicated singleton pregnancy AND a high-risk twin pregnancy with an extended period of secondary infertility and IVF in between, she has a unique perspective on the joys and challenges of pregnancy and motherhood. With her high-risk pregnancy with her twins, she experienced PPROM and became a case study at the University of Minnesota. Abbe shares her story with others to inspire and encourage. She lives in Minneapolis, MN with her family.
One of the most frustrating aspects of building a family is when it takes a struggle to get pregnant. It’s especially exasperating when no one has a WHY. It can make you feel scared, overwhelmed, and basically out of control.
A’ndrea Reiter is a holistic fertility expert, Reiki Master, and the author of How to Get Pregnant Even When You’ve Tried Everything: A Mind-Body Guide to Fertility. She uses a combination of Reiki, intuition, and mindset coaching to move women through the emotional and physical blocks impeding them from conceiving naturally. She’s been published by the Chopra Center, Mind-Body Green, Thrive Global, The Elephant Journal, and is a regular contributor to the #1 fertility magazine, Fertility Road. Though based in NYC and LA, she helps women all over the world achieve their dreams of motherhood.
We all know how challenging and traumatic a stay in the NICU can be for new parents, but NICU isn’t the most common postpartum difficulty to be encountered. The postpartum journey is so different and so unexpected, that postpartum depression is actually the most common stressor. Most expectant parents think, “Oh, it won’t happen to me,” but the truth is that it’s more common than we realize. Let’s talk about how we can prepare ahead of time to minimize the chance of postpartum depression, and how a supportive partnership with your spouse or partner can prevent this from being your experience.
The worst advice anyone can give a woman (or couple) going through infertility, fertility treatment or a high-risk pregnancy is, "You have no control". It is unhelpful and it is just plain wrong. Decades of research have shown the importance of believing in and maintaining control especially when it comes to health. Not only does it help you feel better emotionally, it creates physiological changes in the body, that during infertilty and a high-risk pregnancy, can increase your chances of bringing your baby home. On this episode, I share with you exactly how.
"Don't give up." a comment I've heard all the time, through every stage of my journey and I'm sure many other women have heard as well. It's a comment that is meant to be kind and supportive, but it has really rubbed me the wrong way for a long time. Today I want to discuss why I don't like telling people "don't give up." and talk about real advice that can help someone who has lost that hope.
This episode of Delivering Miracles with Parijat Deshpande is all about the Type-A person. Parijat explains what this means, how this impacts your high-risk pregnancy, and what you can do to accommodate this.
Are you considering which pediatrician you should choose for your child? From personal experience, I know the importance of finding the right pediatrician who will not listen to the outside noise, but who will listen to you and make the best decisions for your child.
Joining me on the show today is Dr. Jennifer Trachtenberg, favorably known as Dr. Jen by her patients. Dr. Jen is a nationally renowned parenting expert, board-certified pediatrician, and has maintained a successful, private practice in New York, New York, at Carnegie Hill Pediatrics for over 20 years. Perhaps Dr. Jen’s greatest accomplishment is being a mother of three children! Listen to today’s show for the information you need to know straight from Dr. Jen.
Show Highlights:
- Dr. Jen discusses the importance of finding a pediatrician who will help educate and advise parents in addition to treating children.
- Parenting is different for each child because each child is unique in his/her own way.
- Dr. Jen advises parents to write down questions for their child’s pediatrician.
- Dr. Jen discusses the importance of making safety paramount when it comes to taking care of children.
- Dr. Jen shares pertinent information for new mothers regarding feeling overwhelmed after having a baby and caring for it.
- Dr. Jen shares the top 2-3 misconceptions new parents have about parenting.
- Dr. Jen says children see their parents as role models.
- Advice to parents of premature babies is given by Dr. Jen.
Resources:
Pediatrician in Your Pocket, a one of a kind, comprehensive video guide for new parents created by Dr. Jen.
Dr. Jen’s website
Dr. Jen’s Facebookpage
Parijat’s book, Pregnancy Brain
It really is this hard. Let this sink in. Don't minimize your feelings. If it feels hard, it's okay. On this episode of Delivering Miracles, Parijat talks you through this important statement that every woman going through a high-risk pregnancy needs to hear.
The term "mind-body connection" can mean a variety of things to so many people. Some take it to mean mental health, others take it to mean nutrition therapy, others take it to mean something about the stars or hanging crystals by your bed. But most of us can agree that it relates somehow to stress. But does it have any impact on the health of your pregnancy? Absolutely. On this episode I share with you how.
Sometimes we are in so desperate need of help, that we don't even realize it. That may seem ridiculous, but sometimes we really can feel like we are "doing fine" when really we need support from others. Today I'm joined by Abbi Perets, Founder of SuccessfulFreelanceMom.com. She teaches at-home moms how to break into freelance writing. She's going to share her story and how she built her village, her support network of friends and family because when it gets down to it, we all need our community, we need our village.
When you're a Type-A, go-getter person who loves to be busy, it hard to accept when your body needs you to go slow. You feel unproductive, helpless and useless, none of which are good for your mental or physical health. On this episode, we talk about how to listen to your body when you need to go slow and how to slow down without feeling like you're stopping your life.
Today on Delivering Miracles, Parijat Deshpande chats with certified advanced birth doula and postpartum educator Adriana Lozada to discuss new motherhood and share their top tips to prepare you for your first few weeks as a new parent.
We all know avoiding important tasks isn't helpful. And yet we all do it, because, let's face it, it's easier than making that doctor's appointment, returning that phone call or doing the bloodwork. Did you know, avoidance builds up anxiety and ends up leaving you more stressed than the actual thing you're avoiding? On this episode, I share with you how to end avoidance once and for all so you can get the health care and support that you need and deserve.
When Janet Jackson announced that she was pregnant at the age of 50, the world gasped and threw judgment in every shade at her. She was too old to have a baby, what was she thinking? But when George Clooney announced he was expecting twins with his wife Amal Clooney, when he was five years older than Janet Jackson was, no one batted an eye. There's a misconception that just because men produce sperm into late in life that means they're able to conceive a healthy child for just as long too. That's just not true. On this episode, I speak with fertility specialist Dr. Aimee Eyvazzadeh about the realities of men's biological clock. We discuss how it contributes to unexplained infertility or miscarriages and what they can do to improve their sperm to increase the likelihood of the couple getting pregnant and having a healthy pregnancy and baby.
Experiencing a loss is heartshattering for any parent. Whether it's a chemical pregnancy, miscarriage, due to prematurity, a stillbirth or any other reason, it is the hardest thing for a parent to survive. Getting pregnant again after a loss can bring up concerns about the health of the baby, fears of another loss and a tremendous distrust of your body. On this episode, Christine shares her personal experiences of pregnancy after loss, how she coped and how she turned her tragedy into personal and professional triumph.
Ever feel angry to the point when you get a baby shower invitation or hear about a birth announcement? Feel that anger bubbling up when you see perfect families with their perfect babies. Ever feel ridiculous that you still feel that way even though you're pregnant or have babies of your own?
On this episode, I share with you why getting rid of that anger isn't the answer and what to do instead.
Parijat Deshpande, high-risk pregnancy expert, clinically trained therapist and former high-risk mom, is here to help you get through your high risk pregnancy! You CAN get back in control of your pregnancy, and Parijat is here to guide you every step of the way.
Environmental toxins are all around us in our day to day lives. From what we eat to what we breathe to what we put on our skin and hair, all of these chemicals impact reproductive health and fertility. On this episode, I speak with Dr. Lora Shahine on how to reduce environmental toxins from your life without feeling like you have to burn down your house to do it. If you are trying to conceive, this episode is a must listen.
The words and labels that you use during your family-building challenges matter. They inform what important anchor points define your story and they validate your experiences. The more you use them, the more others will follow. On this episode, I share with you why we should stop hiding from the terminology that makes us feel seen and heard so we can create a community of support around us as we go through the challenges and then heal after they're all over.
The loss of a dream pregnancy or dream delivery is a real loss, there is no need to justify it. …
The NICU is an overwhelming, scary place that feels like a world away from the rest of the world. Whether you're expecting to spend time in the NICU or it came as a surprise, it takes time to adjust to the pace and the life of the parenting in the NICU. On this episode, I share some of the items that were essential for me to keep my sanity and help me through our 109 day NICU stay. Plus, I share with you ideas for gifts to give loved ones who have a baby in the NICU.
My postpartum looked NOTHING like what I had thought it would, due to the timing of my son’s early birth and the following 109 days spent in NICU. Life was crazy and unpredictable during that time, and my own nutrition was the LAST thing on my mind. I craved the wrong things, didn’t even remember to eat sometimes, and certainly didn’t realize the importance of nutrition in the healing my body was going through after giving birth. I wish I had known THEN what I know NOW!
My friend and colleague, Lily Nichols, is a Registered Dietitian/Nutritionist, Certified Diabetes Educator, researcher, and author. She has a passion for evidence-based prenatal nutrition and exercise, and her unique approach has helped thousands and influenced nutritional policies around the globe. Lily has researched and written about traditional diets recommended for pregnancy in different cultures. She shares with us the long-term effects of poorly-managed gestational diabetes, how “warming” foods help with postpartum healing, and the nutritional needs of the breastfeeding mother. We also discuss suggestions for good nutrition when you’re like I was, stuck in the NICU for 12-13 hours for day after day—focusing on your baby’s nutrition but not caring about your own nutritional needs. There are supplements that can help in healing, but Lily’s top tip is to rest, recover, and receive support during those postpartum weeks. We all need to lean on the people around us for the support we need!
“Self-care is sometimes about not doing anything extra to take care of yourself, but about taking things off your plate.”
Resources:
Real Food for Gestational Diabetes by Lily Nichols
Real Food for Pregnancy by Lily Nichols
www.realfoodforpregnancy.com
Trust. I want to talk to you today about what it means to trust. Webster defines it as “assured reliance on the character ability strength or truth of someone or something.” Quite a heavy load, but we do it all the time. We trust that the builders made our homes sound. We trust our cars will turn on when we go to work in the morning. We see trust the most when we look at children. Something happens along the way as we get older, we think more critically about what we are putting our trust in.
In this episode of Delivering Miracles, high-risk pregnancy expert, clinically trained therapist and former high-risk mom, Parijat Deshpande brings on friend, colleauge, biggest supporter, and clinical psychologist Tara May to discuss the process of dealing with the loss of a child with.
Each pregnancy is different, but there is always hope. In this episode of Delivering Miracles, Parijat Deshpande, high-risk pregnancy expert, clinically trained therapist and former high-risk mom, shares 3 client stories that are filled with hope.
If you’ve had a new baby in the house, then you know how important sleep can be! When you’re sleep deprived, everything else seems so much worse. It’s a learning process to train your little one with good sleep habits and it’s something that will make your life easier. Don’t miss today’s show where we answer many sleep questions from listeners.
Susie Parker is a certified sleep consultant and founder of Sleep Baby Love Child Sleep Consulting. She’s a “been there, done that” mom of two beautiful girls and she has dealt with many sleep challenges head-on. She is trained in the science of sleep by the Family Sleep Institute and her blog has become a go-to resource for many parents of littles. Her articles can be found on some of the most visited parenthood sites, including The Huffington Post, Baby Center, and Baby World, just to name a few. Through personalized consulting and online courses, Susie helps many exhausted families teach their babies, toddlers, and preschoolers to love sleep.
Episode Highlights:
- How Susie’s second daughter inspired her to do this work---after the sleep failures with her first child
- Getting a 6-month-old to nap: consider timing, lighting, and sleep cycles
- When babies transition from 3 naps to 2 naps daily, at 6-8 months
- How to establish good nursing and sleep routines for those who feed on demand
- Recommendations for a small living space without a separate bedroom for the baby
- Sacrificing sleep for travel vs. sacrificing travel for sleep
- Why preemies need more sleep than a full-term baby
- Planning the afternoon/evening/dinner to work toward reasonable bedtime
- Focus on a bedtime routine and set limits: make it a quality time
- Setting the stage with your newborn for good sleep habits
- Don’t worry about bad sleep habits in the beginning: focus on independent sleep skills at about 4 months
- Teaching skills in sleep training vs. “crying it out”
- Tips for new working moms on sleep regression
- Susie’s final words of hope: “You can have life-changing results when you focus on sleep. You don’t win an award for being sleep deprived. There is hope.”
Resources:
www.sleepbabylove.com
Do you feel like a victim to your anxiety at times? Today’s show will help you leave the overwhelm behind, walk around the wall, and find relief. I’ll show you practical steps to get out of your head and learn to listen to your body. You may not realize it, but giving your body what it needs is the key. Stay with me, and I’ll show you how.
Episode Highlights:
- Cognitive Behavior Therapy--challenging and changing thoughts and behaviors to help moods and emotions and dispel anxiety and phobias
- My high-risk pregnancy was my first anxiety experience, and there were many doctors’ appointments where I expected the worst
- How I tried to challenge my bad thoughts but nothing was working, until I discovered the key
- During pregnancy, the baseline for anxiety shifts, and we become more cautious and more attentive
- The problem is that we are so much “in our heads” that we miss out on the tools available to us and we stop listening to our bodies
- The principle of embodiment or “embodied cognition”--your body influences your mind
- When you change your body, you change your mind! It’s a new approach!
- Dr Arielle Schwartz says: “Embodiment is the practice of attending to your
sensations . . .”
- How I’ve used this therapy with a specific client, teaching her to ask, “What does my body need right now?” (the easiest way to deal with anxiety)
- How to honor a to-do list and other concerns of life
- Creating body memories and retraining your systems through your body’s truth
- Two foundational steps: (they are simple, but they need to be practiced)
-
- What do my sensations feel like?
- What does my body need right now?
- Why you need a “bottom-up” approach to get out of your head
- Why my book, Pregnancy Brain, packs in 70 years of research that aligns with this therapy
Your needs are most important and by paying attention to what your body needs, you are giving yourself the greatest gift.
Resources:
Pregnancy Brain by Parijat Deshpande
Stress and the mind-body connection: http://bit.ly/2IWnqFO
The truth about postpartum anxiety http://bit.ly/038dmppa
Your anxious mind during pregnancy, Parijat's interview on Birthful Podcast http://bit.ly/2uelAXr
Confusing, infuriating, unfair, ridiculous, insane...these are just some of the words women in my community use to describe their battles with infertility. Infertility is a very difficult road and challenging on every level. On today’s Q/A show, I am so excited to have your questions answered by one of my favorite infertility specialists, Dr. Aimee Eyvazzadeh.
Dr. Aimee, also known as the “Egg Whisperer,” is one of America’s most well-known fertility doctors. Her success rate at baby-making is what gives future parents hope when all hope is lost. She’s had a hand in creating thousands of happy healthy babies. Dr. Aimee is a Harvard-educated board-certified OB/GYN, specializing in Reproductive Endocrinology and Infertility; but it’s her “Egg Freezing Parties” that put her in the limelight and made her a media darling. She has been featured in magazines like People and Marie Claire, and has been featured on the Today Show, Good Morning America, CBS Morning, Fox Network, along with a number of local and international newscasts. In her off-time, Dr. Aimee is a Mom to four rambunctious young kids aged 9 and under. Her goal is to teach everyone how to become fertility aware and #GetAheadOfInfertility.
Episode Highlights:
- What is secondary infertility and how do I know if I have it? Dr. Aimee discusses and dispels some of the common myths associated with secondary infertility.
- Is secondary defined by getting pregnant once, carrying to term, or where do you draw that line? Dr. Aimee discusses having miscarriages vs. secondary infertility.
- Temping and BBT charting can create Obsessive Compulsive Disorder or cause severe anxiety for those who never experienced it. Dr. Aimee recommends really listening to your body, trusting your body, and using an OPK Test (Ovulation Predictor Kit), which uses litmus paper.
- Fertility apps? Your fertility doctor is smarter. Be aware of how the app company is tracking you or using your information. Not all apps are bad but choose wisely.
- Dr. Aimee is currently working with her technology team on producing an app through which she will be able to work one on one with patients.
- Dr. Aimee’s T-U-S-H-Y method is a method to help patients understand the elements of the basic fertility work-up.
T- the fallopian tubes
U- ultrasound of the uterus
S- semen analysis
H- hormone testing
Y- your genetic profile
- Dr. Aimee goes into great detail about the differences between a saline sonogram, and an HSG. It’s worth asking your doctor about these and where you can have one of these methods done.
- When do you know it’s time for IVF? Dr. Aimee says it’s always diagnosis before treatment. What is diagnosis? Do you need IVF so you can have a baby? Dr. Aimee discusses answers to these questions along with suggesting questions you should ask your doctor.
- PCOS - (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome) - Dr. Aimee discusses balancing hormones prior to pregnancy.
- What can you do to increase chances of getting pregnant without having a miscarriage? Go back to basics. Have hormones checked, have DNA testing done, be checked for anatomical problems, is there a high DNA fragmentation and more tests are discussed by Dr. Aimee.
- If you have never gotten any answers via testing to suggest why you keep miscarrying, your doctor has not tested enough. Dr. Aimee says there is always an explanation. She tells about some of the tests she does during a situation like this.
- Dr. Aimee discusses reasons for stopping trying to get pregnant. Some reasons include severe depression, high FSH level, your partner is not onboard, etc.
- Parijat and Dr. Aimee discuss a natural IVF cycle and problems or things that can occur.
- Why don’t we know more about how to get pregnant? Hopefully, with all the initiatives out there, we will have better options for women.
- Should I be on bed rest after a transfer? (IVF) Do the butt practice for 2 days after your transfer. (butt to bed, butt to couch, butt to toilet, take it easy)
- How can you find a good fertility specialist? Dr. Aimee recommends talking to your friends. Go to a doctor who will truly listen to you. If it doesn’t feel comfortable during your first meeting, walk away.
- How do immunological issues affect fertility? Is there a connection? Dr. Aimee says there are ways to test for natural killer cells and the diagnoses and treatments are not that expensive.
- How old is too old to have a baby on my own? Dr. Aimee says they usually don’t help women over the age of 50. It’s difficult to get viable eggs from women age 46 or older.
- How does diet affect fertility, and does it affect both women and men? Dr. Aimee discusses being healthy but dispels common myths related to what you should or should not eat.
Resources:
Dr. Aimee’s Website
MFB Fertility Test
T-U-S-H-Y
If you’ve experienced reproductive trauma, then you know the real, raw side of family-building---and you know that it’s not always pretty or easy. Do you like to talk about your experience? It may seem normal to want to hide from the reality because it’s tough, but there is a real need to share our stories. There is something innate within us that is meant to thrive on storytelling, and it’s an empowering way to find healing from your trauma.
Episode HIghlights:
- Why storytelling is an important part of history and human culture
- Don’t feel like you must hide from your story anymore!
- Research supports the positive impact of storytelling on the emotional and physical aspects of health
- The stigma you may feel around your story that “doesn’t fit” or have a happy result
- The basis of the gentle progression into storytelling: safety first, and then the emotional work
- Why we resist the idea of sharing our story
- The goal: to unclog and release
- Why being inauthentic creates more stress in the body
- The benefits of empathy and compassion you develop from hearing your own story
- The tendency women have to blame themselves for the trauma: “It’s MY fault.”
- Telling your story gives you the chance to re-author your story to create a more empowering version of what you’ve been through
- Three phases: journaling, composing the story, and sharing the story
- Your story is flexible and will evolve and change over time
- How to start telling your story: “Don’t be afraid to start with the mirror.”
- It’s about creating the change your body is looking for in order to heal
- Integrate your trauma into who you are, so you can recall it from a place of pride and confidence
Resources:
Pregnancy Brain by Parijat Deshpande
What is depression? What causes it? We are talking about everything related to depression, especially as it relates to fertility and pregnancy. I guarantee that today’s show will challenge your thinking in so many ways about depression.
When I used to work in clinical psychology, I was always drawn to the work around depression, grief, and mourning. There are different perspectives on depression and many models that try to explain depression. It wasn’t until I went through infertility and high-risk pregnancy and delved into the field of psychoneuroimmunology that I realized that we seek to treat depression in a way that doesn’t actually treat depression. We slap a Band-Aid on the problem without getting to the root of the problem.
Episode Highlights:
- Depression is closely tied to the stress response that our physical bodies have, and sometimes the symptoms are subtle and not easily recognized
- The stress response is a good thing that protects us and is not just an emotional response, but a response of the nervous, hormonal, and immune systems
- We need to shut down the stress response and turn on the relaxation response
- Depression is related to the stress response because it affects and compromises the immune system and we get sick a lot
- Some changes to our immune system show up as symptoms of depression
- Psychosomatic symptoms are your body’s way of telling you that something is wrong
- My personal story of my mood and stress response while pregnant
- Why I seek to find and treat the physical aspects of depression and not simply the cognitive aspects
- Body symptoms, low mood, frequent sickness, aches and pains, digestive problems, and feelings of “being off,” are all connected to your stress response
- Quick highlights of the current research on the link between depression, fertility problems, and pregnancy risk
- The impact of community support, social support, and partner support
- Don’t waste another day in suffering!
Resources:
Pregnancy Brain by Parijat Deshpande
Episode 74 of Delivering Miracles
Who is taking care of YOU? What are you doing for self-care? We all know that self-care is important, but, if we’re honest, then we admit that it sounds so easy but is very difficult to practice. We go through life pushing ourselves because of being overwhelmed with life, infertility, responsibilities, family stuff, etc. Today’s show is about real-life lessons in self-care that I learned from a beautiful Porsche.
Episode Highlights:
- Why we push ourselves instead of slowing down---until our bodies scream at us to stop
- What self-care can look like when times are tough: self-care isn’t just for you---it benefits your family members
- The massive metaphor: why my car is a total reflection of the state of my life vs. the “Porsche” of self-care
- What are we fueling ourselves with?
- How do we bring self-care into reality?
- The two common excuses we use: there is not enough time and not enough money
- How to reframe those excuses by saying, “It’s not what we want to spend our time/money on right now.”
- Take a total mindset shift to gain control and reprioritize your physical and mental health
- Determine where you’re spending your time and money
- How to deal with the guilt and the story you’ve made up to tell yourself
- Pick time or money, whichever one stresses you out the most. Evaluate your resources and reprioritize to put the extra time or money toward YOU.
- Take care of yourself to enjoy your life more
- What is your ONE TINY THING?
- Delegate, outsource---whatever it takes!
Resources:
www.parijatdeshpande.com
How does it feel to watch your dreams fade away? It’s never a good feeling, but what if those dreams involve how many children to have or when to walk away and end your journey to conceive a child? Somehow, this dream cuts deeper than other dreams that may go unfulfilled in your life.
Dr. Maria Rothenburger is a fertility therapist and coach who has been through infertility challenges. Her doctoral research focused on post-traumatic growth as opposed to PTSD. Though she still practices as a psychotherapist, her passion has become fertility coaching, as she uses a four-pronged approach for movement toward optimal fertility.
Episode Highlights:
- How she and her husband tried for more than 6 years, going through deep depression, anxiety, and intense marriage struggles
- Why they decided the process wasn’t worth the pain and decided to be child-free until changing their minds to pursue adoption
- What post-traumatic growth is and how you can recognize it
- Why Maria is passionate about growth and uses it in coaching
- What is involved in the question: Can we have more children?
- Questions to consider if you are wondering if “this journey needs to end”:
-
- Do the negatives of trying to conceive outweigh the positives?
- Do the positives of stopping outweigh the negatives?
- Are you “talking the talk” but not “walking the walk”?
- Do you spend time obsessing about trying to conceive instead of living life?
- Do you live in a way that isn’t in line with your personality, values, and beliefs?
- Do you feel resentful of the time and energy it takes to try to conceive?
- Do you have a loss of creativity and curiosity around family-building options?
- Do you have a feeling of dread around actually getting pregnant?
- The judgment around your gratefulness, happiness, and positivity for every single moment
- The acceptance piece and how it brings a healthy response
- Recognizing the feelings and making the decision to stop
- Realizing you can grow your life in other ways if you choose not to grow your family
- How pain and grief can be the impetus for finding joy and gratefulness
- Maria’s year-long plan for healing her marriage and finding peace
- Maria’s advice to listenters: “Letting go does NOT mean giving up”
- The fear and desperation that works against you in creating fertility
- How and why we withhold joy and pleasure from ourselves
- Re-train your brain to grow new neurotransmitters and synapses
- Final words of hope: “Pay INTENTION about listening to yourself and trusting yourself. You already know what to do next, and you just have to tune into it.”
Resources:
www.drmariarothenburger.com
Find Dr. Maria on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter
Pregnancy Brain by Parijat Deshpande
When it comes to making decisions about your life, family, and children, the only sure thing is to follow your gut and trust your instincts. Many times the path you envision looks nothing like the journey that reality will bring. No one else--not even your doctor--can decide what’s right for you. Today’s show is my personal story of finding and holding to that very last ray of hope, even when I thought all hope was gone.
Are you considering which pediatrician you should choose for your child? From personal experience, I know the importance of finding the right pediatrician who will not listen to the outside noise, but who will listen to you and make the best decisions for your child.
Joining me on the show today is Dr. Jennifer Trachtenberg, favorably known as Dr. Jen by her patients. Dr. Jen is a nationally renowned parenting expert, board-certified pediatrician, and has maintained a successful, private practice in New York, New York, at Carnegie Hill Pediatrics for over 20 years. Perhaps Dr. Jen’s greatest accomplishment is being a mother of three children! Listen to today’s show for the information you need to know straight from Dr. Jen.
Show Highlights:
- Dr. Jen discusses the importance of finding a pediatrician who will help educate and advise parents in addition to treating children.
- Parenting is different for each child because each child is unique in his/her own way.
- Dr. Jen advises parents to write down questions for their child’s pediatrician.
- Dr. Jen discusses the importance of making safety paramount when it comes to taking care of children.
- Dr. Jen shares pertinent information for new mothers regarding feeling overwhelmed after having a baby and caring for it.
- Dr. Jen shares the top 2-3 misconceptions new parents have about parenting.
- Dr. Jen says children see their parents as role models.
- Advice to parents of premature babies is given by Dr. Jen.
Resources:
Pediatrician in Your Pocket, a one of a kind, comprehensive video guide for new parents created by Dr. Jen.
Dr. Jen’s website
Dr. Jen’s Facebook page
Parijat’s book, Pregnancy Brain
The worst advice anyone can give a woman (or couple) going through infertility, fertility treatment or a high-risk pregnancy is, "You have no control". It is unhelpful and it is just plain wrong. Decades of research have shown the importance of believing in and maintaining control especially when it comes to health. Not only does it help you feel better emotionally, it creates physiological changes in the body, that during infertilty and a high-risk pregnancy, can increase your chances of bringing your baby home. On this episode, I share with you exactly how.
Having a high-risk pregnancy can make you feel like your whole world is collapsing. So many women have to cut back on work or stop working all together. And once baby comes, depending on circumstances, you may be unable to return to career for years, if at all. It's stressful and heartbreaking but there is hope. On this episode, Meg shares with us how to create your dream career despite having a high-risk pregnancy so you can have your dream family and career and enjoy both too.
We all know avoiding important tasks isn't helpful. And yet we all do it, because, let's face it, it's easier than making that doctor's appointment, returning that phone call or doing the bloodwork. Did you know, avoidance builds up anxiety and ends up leaving you more stressed than the actual thing you're avoiding? On this episode, I share with you how to end avoidance once and for all so you can get the health care and support that you need and deserve.
Thousands of women experience pregnancy and/or birth trauma every year. Without proper support, resources and information, trauma is often overlooked and women are left feeling alone as they navigate their healing journey. On this episode, I share the critical step that's involved in healing from trauma so you can experience joy and peace again.
A high-risk pregnancy is a uniquely difficult time because of the emotional and physical intensity. Within a short 40 weeks - sometimes less - you might hear difficult news, have to make impossible decisions all while feeling the weight of being responsible for another life. You hope for a miracle and yet you aren't sure if you'll be lucky enough to experience one. On this episode, I share with you why I believe everyone one of us has the power to create miracles during a high-risk pregnancy.
When you lose your temper on your child, it doesn't make you a bad mother. Every single mother on this planet has done it. But it is an opportunity for growth and self-reflection so you can continue to be the best mother and raise the best version of your child. On this episode, we talk about those rage-filled moments, what they are, what they mean and how to make them stop.
With increased attention on postpartum depression in the media and in research, more and more women (and their loved ones) are becoming sensitive to recognizing the signs and symptoms early. However, sometimes the signs and symptoms of postpartum depression, like crying, are not necessarily pointing to depression. Sometimes, crying is not a sign of a mental health condition at all but a sign of healing. On this episode, I share with you how to tell the difference.
Experiencing a loss is heartshattering for any parent. Whether it's a chemical pregnancy, miscarriage, due to prematurity, a stillbirth or any other reason, it is the hardest thing for a parent to survive. Getting pregnant again after a loss can bring up concerns about the health of the baby, fears of another loss and a tremendous distrust of your body. On this episode, Christine shares her personal experiences of pregnancy after loss, how she coped and how she turned her tragedy into personal and professional triumph.
The term "mind-body connection" can mean a variety of things to so many people. Some take it to mean mental health, others take it to mean nutrition therapy, others take it to mean something about the stars or hanging crystals by your bed. But most of us can agree that it relates somehow to stress. But does it have any impact on the health of your pregnancy? Absolutely. On this episode I share with you how.
When you're a Type-A, go-getter person who loves to be busy, it hard to accept when your body needs you to go slow. You feel unproductive, helpless and useless, none of which are good for your mental or physical health. On this episode, we talk about how to listen to your body when you need to go slow and how to slow down without feeling like you're stopping your life.
When it's easy to have your first child, it's a pretty safe assumption that having subsequent children will be easy too. You start planning out how to space them apart, when to start trying and believe everything will go according to plan, just like it did the first time. When that isn't the case, and it takes much longer to have the second (or third or fourth)...or you have to rely on fertility treatment to continue building your family, it's heartbreaking and life-shattering. On this episode, Sarah Argenal and delve into the realities of secondary infertility, what it means and how to cope when having more children ends up being so much harder than you originally thought it would.
The words and labels that you use during your family-building challenges matter. They inform what important anchor points define your story and they validate your experiences. The more you use them, the more others will follow. On this episode, I share with you why we should stop hiding from the terminology that makes us feel seen and heard so we can create a community of support around us as we go through the challenges and then heal after they're all over.
Financial stress is a tremendous source of stress for women with a high-risk pregnancy. Whether it's because you spent much of your savings trying to get pregnant or you ended up on bed rest and can no longer work, financial stress is very real and can leave women feeling even more helpless and anxious about their future than they already feel because of their pregnancy complications.
On this episode, I speak with financial expert, Aisha Taylor, on how she empowered herself to take charge of her finances when she found herself pregnant with twins.
Environmental toxins are all around us in our day to day lives. From what we eat to what we breathe to what we put on our skin and hair, all of these chemicals impact reproductive health and fertility. On this episode, I speak with Dr. Lora Shahine on how to reduce environmental toxins from your life without feeling like you have to burn down your house to do it. If you are trying to conceive, this episode is a must listen.
The NICU is an overwhelming, scary place that feels like a world away from the rest of the world. Whether you're expecting to spend time in the NICU or it came as a surprise, it takes time to adjust to the pace and the life of the parenting in the NICU. On this episode, I share some of the items that were essential for me to keep my sanity and help me through our 109 day NICU stay. Plus, I share with you ideas for gifts to give loved ones who have a baby in the NICU.
When you have challenges creating the family of your dreams, whether it's experiencing loss or infertility, a high-risk pregnancy or prematurity, it wreaks havoc on all aspects of your life. You feel alone and can have a million questions swirling in your mind that you don't know where to find the answers to.
On this episode, I answer 4 of my listeners' questions as they navigate their journey to building the family of their dreams.
When I first started watching This is Us, the very first episode reminded me of a good friend I'd met during my high-risk pregnancy. Not long before I was pregnant, she had been pregnant after fertility treatment. Not with one. Not with twins. But with triplets.
On this episode, she shares her experience of finding out she was pregnant with triplets, how she coped with her high-risk pregnancy and what her NICU journey was like trying to juggle three babies in the hospital.
For many couples who experience fertility challenges, adoption is often an option that's considered the next step. But is it right for everyone? And is it only an option if you fail to get pregnant with fertility treatment?
The answer to both is no.
On this episode, I speak with Emylee Williams who shares her journey to motherhood through adoption, how they chose the route they did and whether they would do it again.
Ever feel angry to the point when you get a baby shower invitation or hear about a birth announcement? Feel that anger bubbling up when you see perfect families with their perfect babies. Ever feel ridiculous that you still feel that way even though you're pregnant or have babies of your own?
On this episode, I share with you why getting rid of that anger isn't the answer and what to do instead.
There are far too many misconceptions and incorrect stereotypes about maternal mental health. From believing a woman is crazy to labeling her as ungrateful, these judgments prevent women from receiving the help and support that they and deserve to be happy, healthy moms.
OBs, pediatricians and other medical providers play a key role in helping women receive the appropriate care as quickly as possible to help them manage postpartum mental health challenges.
On this episode, I speak with perinatal mental health specialist Dr. Kat Kaeni about what physicians need to know and do to help more women access mental health support postpartum. Plus we discuss what women can do to advocate for themselves if their OB or pediatrician is not supportive.
No matter the circumstances, when you feel like all options are gone and your back is to the wall, we feel extremely frustrated. That frustration can lead to making poor choices, lashing out at loved ones and/or feeling hopeless or worse, falling into a depression.
On this episode, I share with you how to take back control during some of the most helpless times of your life.
Episode Highlights:
- What is frustration and how does it build up in our bodies
- How the stress from frustration impacts us physically
- Client story of helplessness and hopelessness when she felt like all the doors around her were shut and she'd never have a baby
- How to know when you're pushed up against a wall and it's time to take back control
- What to do when the one thing you want is out of a situation you cannot get out of
- How to pinpoint exactly what is in our control that will actually make a difference
- The #1 question you have to ask yourself every single day - ideally in the morning - to get back in control of a situation that feels out of your hands
- What happened when I started asking myself this question when I was at some of my lowest points
- How this question actually creates physical changes in your brain that cascade into your body - and the experiment I used to do when teaching social psychology that shocked my students too
- Why doing this is critical when you're facing infertility or a high-risk pregnancy and how it can not only help you cope but help you thrive
You only have the options that you can see. Calming your brain and body can help you identify options you never considered before.
Resources for the show: * How to overcome stress and anxiety during a high-risk pregnancy and give your baby a strong start to life (Free webinar) * Stay in touch with me on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram
Want more? Subscribe to Delivering Miracles® on iTunes, Stitcher, and Google Playto make sure you don't miss the latest episode on how to get through infertility, a high-risk pregnancy, prematurity and NICU stay and how to heal after it's all over and baby is home.
My postpartum looked NOTHING like what I had thought it would, due to the timing of my son’s early birth and the following 109 days spent in NICU. Life was crazy and unpredictable during that time, and my own nutrition was the LAST thing on my mind. I craved the wrong things, didn’t even remember to eat sometimes, and certainly didn’t realize the importance of nutrition in the healing my body was going through after giving birth. I wish I had known THEN what I know NOW!
My friend and colleague, Lily Nichols, is a Registered Dietitian/Nutritionist, Certified Diabetes Educator, researcher, and author. She has a passion for evidence-based prenatal nutrition and exercise, and her unique approach has helped thousands and influenced nutritional policies around the globe. Lily has researched and written about traditional diets recommended for pregnancy in different cultures. She shares with us the long-term effects of poorly-managed gestational diabetes, how “warming” foods help with postpartum healing, and the nutritional needs of the breastfeeding mother. We also discuss suggestions for good nutrition when you’re like I was, stuck in the NICU for 12-13 hours for day after day—focusing on your baby’s nutrition but not caring about your own nutritional needs. There are supplements that can help in healing, but Lily’s top tip is to rest, recover, and receive support during those postpartum weeks. We all need to lean on the people around us for the support we need!
“Self-care is sometimes about not doing anything extra to take care of yourself, but about taking things off your plate.”
Resources:
Real Food for Gestational Diabetes by Lily Nichols
Real Food for Pregnancy by Lily Nichols
www.realfoodforpregnancy.com
Even though pain and I are complete enemies, I feel like we are best friends in a way, simply because we know each other so well and I don’t live a day without it. When pain becomes a normal part of your life, then you can’t imagine a day without it and you “just get used to it.” Some people choose to deal with pain with pills, but many of us are forced to consider other options. Are there other options? My guest today is here to share interesting techniques and perspectives that can help us manage pain without medications. Dr. Beth Darnall is THE specialist on pain management from Stanford University. As the author of three books, she is “dedicated to empowering life beyond pain.” Beth shares her practical tips to help you get control of your chronic pain and gives words of hope for anyone who longs to live life to the fullest without being a slave to pain. Learn to tap into the control of your mind and your body and break the power of pain!
Bringing your baby home from the NICU sounds like its the end of the hard part. But sometimes its even harder to deal with the feelings of loneliness and anxiety. You need t build a postpartum team, just like you need a prenatal team and a NICU team. I'm very excited to introduce this weeks guest, Hannah Chelsey. Hannah is the founder of "The Baby Maven" She helps first time mothers gain the confidence and control they need to feel supported and successful as a parent. She will walk us through the support you need once baby comes home.
Trust. I want to talk to you today about what it means to trust. Webster defines it as “assured reliance on the character ability strength or truth of someone or something.” Quite a heavy load, but we do it all the time. We trust that the builders made our homes sound. We trust our cars will turn on when we go to work in the morning. We see trust the most when we look at children. Something happens along the way as we get older, we think more critically about what we are putting our trust in.
Sometimes we are in so desperate need of help, that we don't even realize it. That may seem ridiculous, but sometimes we really can feel like we are "doing fine" when really we need support from others. Today I'm joined by Abbi Perets, Founder of SuccessfulFreelanceMom.com. She teaches at-home moms how to break into freelance writing. She's going to share her story and how she built her village, her support network of friends and family because when it gets down to it, we all need our community, we need our village.
Ectopic pregnancy is not often talked about, but this happens to many women and can actually be quite dangerous. As someone who has gone through an ectopic pregnancy, it is important for me to talk about this experience, and that we understand how it is different from a miscarriage. In this episode, I will talk more about what an ectopic pregnancy is, share my personal story, and offer some advice and tools you can use if you or someone you know is experiencing this.
The words you use can be so powerful for healing if you allow yourself to be exactly where you are. I will never tell you not to say or express the fears and negative thoughts that you are experiencing. I will never tell you that you are not broken because healing can begin wherever you are and however you feel, though many people want to push you forward and make it all nicer. By acknowledging and sharing the emotions that you've been carrying, even if they seem scary or negative, you will actually be able to heal faster. In this episode, we will talk about some ways that you can address these feelings without feeling that you need to push them away or make them nicer than they are.
Today we're going to shed some more light on recurrent pregnancy loss. If you've experienced recurrent pregnancy loss, you know how hard it is to cope with, especially when there is often no reason or explanation for it. Joining us today is Dr. Lora Shahine, Reproductive Endocrinologist, who specializes in recurrent pregnancy loss. She will tell us about what drew her to Reproductive Endocrinology, and share some invaluable information and advice about how to navigate this difficult territory and find the support you need.
If you want to know more about Dr. Shahine's work, you can find her book, Not Broken, on Amazon, or reach her at lorashahine.com and on social media @drlorashahine.
Women going through pregnancy complications know that they didn't do anything to cause their fertility challenges or pregnancy complications, yet our brains are trained to go to a place of guilt and self blame. This is a difficult process, because as humans we want someone or something to blame, but we need to have strategies to prevent this unnecessary guilt from creeping in. In this episode we will talk about how to learn to let the blame go and truly deeply heal.
We often romanticize the idea of having twins, but twins are actually considered a high risk pregnancy. So today to show the true, realistic side of twin pregnancy, we are joined by Brittany Dixon. Brittany Dixon is an organizing and productivity strategist for stressed out and exhausted women entrepreneurs. She's here today to share her experience carrying twins and her own high risk journey.
We all know that stress isn't good for our bodies, but we often tend to push it to the side and bottle it up rather than dealing with it. Stress extremely impactful on pregnancy health. Stress during pregnancy has been found related to pre-term birth, low birth weight and much much more. Today I want to dive into ways to manage your stress; in simple and effective ways to keep your pregnancy healthy. Because it's not your fault, and you do not deserve to be stressed out.
While being on bed rest might be necessary for you and your baby physically, your mind can wander and get caught up in all the "what ifs." A question I faced and I know many other women have faced is: "What's going to happen to my career." It can create so much extra anxiety and you don't deserve that. So toady I'm joined by Arianna Taboada, a maternal health consultant, she helps women construct their maternity leave plan and return to work. We're going to talk about how you can babyproof your career, so you can cut down on some of that stress and anxiety.
So much of medicine today is a "one size fits all" approach, and if you've been listening to this podcast for awhile, you know how much I don't believe in "one size fits all." Today I'm going to walk you through a number of alternative therapies that could be beneficial to you if you find yourself experiencing the limitations of modern medicine.
Today on Delivering Miracles our guest is Lori Bregman, a renowned doula, life coach, healer and author of The Mindful Mom to Be. She's here to explain what exactly a doula is, and how they can help you through your pregnancy journey from fertility, through pregnancy and into motherhood.
"Don't give up." a comment I've heard all the time, through every stage of my journey and I'm sure many other women have heard as well. It's a comment that is meant to be kind and supportive, but it has really rubbed me the wrong way for a long time. Today I want to discuss why I don't like telling people "don't give up." and talk about real advice that can help someone who has lost that hope.
We often compare our experiences to others and see ours as "imperfect." Today we our guest is Jillian Grover owner of the "Doing away with Perfect" blog. She joins us today to share her imperfect delivery story and to show you that you are not alone, and to change the way you remember what you've been through.
There is no "one size fits all" solution to fertility treatment. So today I'm going to break down all of the possible options so that you have and idea of which ones are for you. There is no one solutions for everyone, you have to listen to your body.
In this episode we are joined by Lindsay Stenovec, a San Diego based dietitian nutritionist and owner of Nutrition Instincts who is focused on helping women make peace with food and their bodies. We discuss the importance of maintaining a healthy body image, and how you can support your own body image, especially when your fertility and pregnancy journey are less than ideal.
There's one particular lie that so many women going through infertility, high-risk pregnancy, prematurity or taking care of children tell themselves and their loved ones. It's so common that we don't even think twice about it. But this lie is one that is affecting not just you but your pregnancy and your health. On this episode, I share with you how to stop telling this life and improve your health and wellness with just a few simple questions.
Today we talk about something that is rarely discussed, surrogacy. there is a lot of misinformation and mystery around surrogacy and gestational carriers, so here to help demystify the topic is Eloise Drane. Eloise has been an egg donor as well as a 3 time surrogate mother. She is now the founder/owner of Family Inceptions International, a family planning agency specializing in surrogacy and egg donation. I hope her experiences can shed some light on this often controversial topic.
Memories of traumatic pregnancies are not just stored in the mind but the body as well. I tell you about my own experiences and discuss ways to confront and conquer these body memories.
Today's guest is the expert of experts on gestational diabetes, Lily Nichols: registered dietitian nutritionist, certified diabetes educator, researcher, speaker, and author. Gestational diabetes was Parijat's 7th complication during her high-risk pregnancy and today she chats with Lily to candidly discuss her experience and how you can feel better guided in your pregnancy journey.
We hear a lot about women's age correlating to fertility, but not as much about men's age. This can translate to a lot of pressure. In this episode, we discuss child development from both the perspective of a man and a woman's age.
Postpartum anxiety is almost 2-3 times more common than postpartum depression. Unfortunately, too few people know about it, talk about it or even understand it, leaving too many women to suffer in silence. That ends today. On this episode, I share with you the truth about postpartum anxiety including what signs to look for as well as 2 powerful techniques to try for quick relief.