Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids Podcast: Recent Episodes
Kate Lynch
As parents of atypical kids, we are going to continue to lead challenging lives. Despite overwhelm, isolation and uncertainty, we can cultivate joyful moments, which will help us feel more connected, kind and present with our kids. Together, we can turn the tide of modern parenting towards a more inclusive, compassionate and collaborative approach.
Kate Lynch (she/her): parent to an amazing atypical kid, inclusive yoga teacher, mindful parenting mentor and author. She teaches calming tools to parents of intense kids.
https://www.healthyhappyyoga.com/
SPOILERS: Unpacking Netflix's "Adolescence" From a Peaceful Parenting Perspective With Sarah Rosensweet
Why are we scapegoating the symptom of social media when oppressive systems are the root cause of a disconnected generation?
As an artist obsessed with breaking generational cycles (while raising a budding filmmaker) the series had me riveted from the opening shot.
That’s why I was giddy when Sarah Rosensweet of Peaceful Parenting agreed to go live with me to talk about “Adolescence.” The insights that it raised for us both go far beyond hysteria about social media. Despite the sensational aspects of the story, the experiences depicted highlight real issues in raising and connecting with teenagers.
Sarah shared why it’s crucial to engage with teens even when they seem distant and how boosting their sense of self-worth can be super protective.
"What our kids need most from us is to feel lovable and worthy. Even if they're artists instead of jocks."
-Sarah Rosensweet
Raising Reflective Rebels
In our conversation, radical parenting felt to both of us like a glimmer of hope. This approach, influenced by Alfie Kohn, focuses on nurturing reflective rebels:
“Raising kids who won't be quiet if something's not fair, and will stand up and say something when someone's being bullied. This kind of parenting… starts at home, allowing your child to question you and talk back to you. And this is their practice for going out in the world and standing up for what's right.”
-Sarah Rosensweet
"Adolescence" serves as a powerful reflection on family dynamics and systems that perpetuate violence.
Cycle-breaking and mindful parenting are the most radical things we can do right now to protect our kids from those systems.
Through connection, acceptance, and supporting our children's uniqueness, we can navigate the complexities of modern parenting with hope and intention.
What Can Bluey and Lizzo Teach Us About Parenting, Burnout, and Creativity?
Another insightful conversation with Ryan Rose Weaver, a writer, educator, consultant, and parent of a twice-exceptional child. In this episode, we explore the vital role of creativity as preventative care for parental burnout, especially for parents of neurodivergent kids. We discuss the importance of finding fulfillment, community support, and mindfulness practices.
According to Ryan, Bluey is a show for grownups about parenting, and kids just happen to like it. She talks about an episode dedicated to creativity. Have you seen it? What’s your perspective? Where do you find inspiration within your parenting life? How do you acknowledge the moments of joy, no matter how small, amidst the chaos?
Engage with us and build a supportive community as we navigate raising neurodivergent kids together. Read the full transcript, listen to the podcast, and subscribe to the blog for more connection and support at :
Atypical Kids, Mindful Parents Blog:
https://katelynch.substack.com/
In Tending:
https://ryanroseweaver.substack.com/Don't forget to subscribe, follow, review, and tune in every two weeks for new episodes!
00:00 Introduction and Guest Overview01:12 Connecting Creativity and Parental Burnout02:17 Navigating Parenting Challenges03:05 Rituals and Milestones in Parenting04:08 The Concept of 'Eddying Out'05:31 Balancing Self and Caregiving07:28 The Importance of Community and Support18:31 Creativity as Preventative Care20:34 Navigating Shame in Creativity21:19 The Magic of Bluey22:14 Defining Creativity and Its Forms25:08 Flow State: The Joy of Creative Process27:31 Unlearning and Embracing Interruptions35:32 The Power of Community and Support41:34 Cherishing Parenting Moments43:33 Gratitude and Joy in Everyday Life44:25 Conclusion and Farewell
I wish someone had told me the advice Ryan gives parents worried about the IEP process.
When she said it in the interview, I almost cried.
Follow for more mindful parenting for neurodiverse families. An honest review helps other parents find this community, and I'm grateful for yours.
Ryan Rose Weaver is an educator and parent to a twice-exceptional child. In this episode, we talked about the challenges of balancing intensive caregiving seasons, and the importance of parental self-compassion. In particular, we focused on the Individualized Education Program (IEP) process.
Ryan shared her personal story of navigating her child's struggles in a Montessori school setting. offering insights into how she balanced her own self-care through creative practices like movement and writing.
We also explored the importance of creating relational rituals, advocating for better communication between parents and teachers, and practical practices to maintain mental and emotional well-being.
The most impactful part of the conversation for me was Ryan’s perspective as a teacher conducting IEP meetings, and her advice and strategies for stressed out parents.
The episode wraps up with a guided mindfulness practice for parents, encouraging tranquility and resilience.
00:00 Introduction to Atypical Kids Mindful Parents Podcast
00:43 Introduction to Ryan Rose Weaver
01:47 Challenges in Early Education
03:02 Discovering Sensory Integration Issues
04:30 Navigating the IEP Process
08:18 Creative Practices as Survival Instinct
08:59 Balancing Parental Identity and Self-Care
09:28 The Importance of Self-Tending
10:15 Challenges in the Education System
16:01 Teacher-Parent Relationships
17:02 Preparing for IEP Meetings
18:11 Advocating for Children in IEP Meetings
25:05 Creating Rituals for Self and Relational Care
27:54 Including Children in IEP Meetings
34:22 Mindfulness and Support Practices
41:45 Conclusion and Guest Information
Find Ryan on Substack and Instagram at Ryan Rose Weaver.
Want to give back? Your reviews are always a gift!
Read the full transcript, listen to the podcast, watch the video, and subscribe to the blog for more connection and support at Atypical Kids, Mindful Parents Blog: https://katelynch.substack.com/
Generational Autism: A Mom's Journey of Radical Acceptance and Connection with Julie M. Green
In this episode, listen in on an enlightening conversation with Julie M. Green, a writer and artist from Kingston, Canada. Julie discusses the nuances of parenting as a late-diagnosed autistic woman and the evolving narrative around autism and neurodivergence.
Explore generational autism, radical acceptance, and the importance of connection over fear.
Julie shares her personal parenting journey, coping mechanisms, and insights as well as the details of her autism diagnosis later in life... and how her autistic teen reacted to the news that they share a diagnosis.
Read the full transcript, listen to the podcast, watch the video, and subscribe to the blog for more connection and support at Atypical Kids, Mindful Parents Blog: https://katelynch.substack.com/
Balancing Joy and Sorrow: Parenting Neurodivergent Children with Shelley Karpaty.
In this heartfelt episode of Atypical Kids, Mindful Parents, host Kate Lynch engages in a deep conversation with Shelley Karpaty, a writer, meditation guide, and mental health advocate.
Shelley shares insightful stories from her journey parenting a child diagnosed with schizophrenia, the importance of self-compassion, and the challenges and strengths of balancing multiple roles as a parent. They discuss societal expectations and how to navigate the complexities of mental health within families. The dialogue weaves through themes of unconditional love, mindfulness practices, and the value of community support. Parents of neurodivergent kids will find solace and understanding here.
00:00 Introduction: Embracing Dual Emotions
00:34 The Heroine's Journey: A Mother's Struggle
01:03 Welcome to Atypical Kids, Mindful Parents
01:44 Meet Shelly Karpati: Advocate and Author
02:45 Understanding Schizophrenia and Neurodivergence
05:23 Parenting Challenges and Triumphs
07:16 Support Systems and Community
09:20 Coping Mechanisms and Self-Care
14:07 Mindfulness and Metta Practices
18:03 Reflections on Parenting and Personal Growth
32:26 Final Thoughts and Resources
Navigating public spaces with atypical kids, overcoming stigma, and building an inclusive future!
In this powerful episode, I’m speaking with Jennifer Natalya Fink, Director of Disability Studies at Georgetown University and author of 'All Our Families: Disability Lineage and the Future of Kinship.'
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Jennifer shares her insights on viewing disability as an identity rather than a deficit and emphasizes the importance of community and cultural understanding for disabled individuals and their families.
This episode is a must-watch for parents, educators, and advocates who are on a journey to create a kinder, more inclusive world.
Timestamps:
00:00 Positive Disability Identity and Community with Jennifer Natalya Fink
01:21 Introduction to Jennifer Natalya Fink
02:42 Understanding Disability as an Identity
06:14 Exploring Disability Lineage
12:29 Public Perception and Disability
14:50 Building Community and Identity
17:22 Empowering Disabled Children
20:59 Looking Towards the Future
23:39 Embracing Disability: Challenges and Acceptance
24:30 Affirmations and Prepared Language
27:42 Building Community and Seeking Support
30:39 Creating Meaningful Connections
32:17 The Importance of Routine and Commitment
34:14 Cultural and Social Identity
36:12 Personal Growth and Enlightenment
38:08 Legacy and Parenting Memories
40:24 Final Thoughts and Resources
Self-compassion helps parents and their neurodivergent children to feel more resilient.
In this episode of Atypical Kids Mindful Parents Podcast, I’m interviewing Jamie Lynn Tatera, a mindfulness and self-compassion teacher and author of 'Mindfulness and Self Compassion Workbook for Kids’. (As an amazon affiliate, I earn from qualifying purchases.)
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We discuss the importance of self-compassion for both parents and their neurodivergent children, sharing personal stories and practical strategies.
The conversation delves into resilience habits, some of the ups and downs we’ve had raising our neurodivergent kids, and the role of mindfulness in navigating the challenges.
Jamie Lynn shares breathing exercises and introduces animal characters to help children and parents recognize and manage emotions. The episode will encourage you to grow your mindfulness and self-compassion skills yourself, while showing you fun and relatable ways to share them with your kids.
Timestamps:
00:00 Introduction to Resilience Habits
00:22 Welcome to Atypical Kids Mindful Parents Podcast
00:59 Meet Jamie Lynn Teterra
02:29 Discovering Self-Compassion
03:36 Parenting Neurodivergent Children
05:00 The Role of Self-Compassion in Parenting
09:51 Practical Self-Compassion Techniques
12:44 Empathic Distress Breath Practice for Highly Sensitive Kids
16:55 Using Animals to Teach Kids Mindfulness
23:00 Balancing Strengths and Weaknesses
31:10 Final Thoughts and Encouragement
Exciting New Season of Atypical Kids, Mindful Parents Podcast!
Introducing the highly anticipated eighth season of the Atypical Kids, Mindful Parents Podcast!
Discover new episodes featuring insightful discussions with experts like:
- Dr. Matt Zakreski,
- Jamie Lynn Tatera,
- Jennifer Natalya Fink,
- Shelley Karpati,
- Julie M. Green, and
- Ryan Rose Weaver.
Learn about book giveaways, resilience practices, positive disability identity, mental health, and self-compassion. Engage with us and build a supportive community as we navigate raising neurodivergent kids together.
Don't forget to subscribe, review, and tune in every two weeks for new episodes!
00:00 Introduction to the New Podcast Season
02:48 Upcoming Guests and Topics
04:07 Mid-Season Highlights
05:18 Engaging with the Community
07:29 Breathing Exercise and Conclusion
Thanks for listening to Atypical Kids, Mindful Parents Podcast!
Essential skills for parenting neurodivergent children, from managing expectations to dealing with discomfort.
In this episode, I’m talking with Dr. Matt Zakreski, a clinical psychologist, founder of the Neurodiversity Collective, and co-host of the Nerding Out on Neurodiversity Podcast.
We’re sharing personal stories and expert advice on managing expectations and finding community support.
Dr. Matt introduces his book, 'The Neurodiversity Playbook,' aimed at helping parents and neurodivergent individuals navigate a neurotypical world.
3 Ways To Enter the Book Giveaway:
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Timestamps:
00:00 Understanding the Brain's Default to Self-Blame
00:35 Introduction to Atypical Kids Mindful Parents Podcast
01:18 Meet Dr. Matt: Expert in Neurodiversity
02:12 Challenges of Parenting Neurodivergent Children
05:49 The Importance of Community and Support
08:24 Curiosity Over Fury: A Parenting Strategy
12:19 The Role of Mindfulness in Parenting
19:52 Giftedness and Neurodiversity: Definitions and Misconceptions
24:59 The Pressure of Perfectionism
25:38 Gifted Kids and Society's Expectations
26:05 A Personal Story of Burnout and Happiness
27:19 Introducing the Book: Theory and Practice
28:22 Understanding Neurodivergence
29:40 The Flash and Neurodivergent Kids
33:17 Helping a Dad Connect with His Son
39:05 Core Values and Parenting
41:36 Sensory Needs and Authentic Parenting
42:50 Conclusion
Listen in on an intimate conversation between myself and one of my beloved private parent coaching clients. She's building confidence and compassion while raising her neurodivergent kid. Learn how self-compassion plays a crucial role in mindful parenting. Building Confidence in Parenting: Strategies and Support for Neurodiverse Families
Discover:
-the power of a judgment-free coaching relationship.
-the simplicity of self-regulation techniques.
-the value of connecting deeply with your child.
Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids podcast helps parents feel less alone. Kate interviews parents and experts who share her mission to co-create a more inclusive future.
Join us in this insightful interview where we're discussing parenting with compassion, empathy, and boundary-setting.
This episode delves into my client's goals, including safety, mindful spending, balancing screen time, fostering open communication, and developing self-compassion as a parent.
Read the full transcript, listen to the podcast, watch the video, and subscribe to the blog for more connection and support at Atypical Kids, Mindful Parents Blog: https://katelynch.substack.com/
Witness the transformation and growth in a parent-child bond through practical exercises and mutual understanding.
00:00 Introduction to Mindful Parenting
00:55 Starting the Coaching Journey
02:02 Setting Boundaries and Expectations
02:58 Self-Regulation and Empathy
04:55 Screen Time and Activities
09:58 Building Confidence and Self-Compassion
11:42 Collaborative Problem Solving
12:18 Celebrating Wins and Bonding
13:25 Final Reflections and Gratitude
Explore the 3 ways I offer coaching:
Private Parent Coaching Package of 6 Sessions $445.
Founding Supporter 1-1 Voxer Coaching 3 months $150.
Community Monthly Mindful Parent Coaching for all paid Substack subscribers, starting at $5/month.
How to Balance Support and Independence in Neurodivergent Teens
Raising neurodivergent teens requires us to walk the razor's edge between offering support and encouraging independence...
...it's a balance that can sometimes feel elusive.
I'm Kate Lynch, and the other day I discussed this with Dr. Emily W. King, a child psychologist with a wealth of experience working with neurodivergent kids.
Before she became a parent, Dr. Emily was a licensed psychologist. Despite all her academic knowledge and training, having her own kids and working with her clients provided the real education. Nothing prepares you for the emotional experience of parenting. Knowledge helps, but understanding how our brains and bodies work together—in vastly different ways—comes from lived experience. As Dr. Emily put it, “Lived experience is just as valuable as any letters we have behind our name.”
Every child is different, and each family figures out what work best for them. For instance, my son is now comfortable taking the subway to school, although that journey had its challenges. He has navigated train disruptions, struggled with confusion, and yet persisted, growing more independent over time.
Dr. Emily noted that our kids are on their own timelines, and traditional age-based developmental milestones don’t apply to neurodivergent kids. Trusting the process, allowing for those inevitable challenges, and seeing them as growth opportunities are critical. Understanding and accepting this can alleviate some parental anxiety.
Sometimes, teens might feel they no longer need certain therapies, even when their parents think otherwise. Emily suggested a collaborative approach: understanding the child’s perspective, discussing their goals, and finding compromises that respect their feelings while ensuring they get the support they need.
One particularly touching moment Dr. Emily recalled was when her son unexpectedly grabbed her hand in a crowd, a simple yet profound reminder that there’s a last time for everything—we just don’t know when it will be.
By sharing experiences and learning from each other, we can help our neurodivergent kids feel safe, understood, and empowered to grow.
Join the Movement! Come Together to Create a More Inclusive World for Our Kids, One Parent at a Time...
If you’re anything like other parents I talk to, you’re seeking 3 things:
- Connection with other parents who get it.
- Support, empathy and guidance through the rough spots.
- Resources to help your children.
I’m committed to providing all three for you here at Atypical Kids, Mindful Parents!
Get access to monthly Mindful Parent Community Coaching by subscribing at any paid tier.
Starts at only $5 a month!
+PLUS: “Founding Supporter” tier members will have access to 3 months of my 1-1 asynchronous parent coaching pilot program!
"Kate did a great job creating a safe space and bringing relevant topics to the group."
https://katelynch.substack.com/p/back-to-school-support-special
When you're suffering and searching for self-compassion, you may be thinking, "But I'm already feeling so vulnerable! I can't take it. I need to numb out. This is too much!!!"
Right over that hill you can't quite see beyond, self-compassion is waiting for you.
The other day during a vulnerability hangover, I recorded an especially helpful audio meditation for the Compassion Club Private Podcast.
I'd like to share it with my community here because I appreciate you! It's going to be especially helpful for those of you who are ready to tread the transformative path from all-out resistance and overwhelm, through vulnerability, to self-compassion.
Listen now | 20 Min Meditation:
Self-compassion for the days you have a vulnerability hangover.
I share a bit of my personal process in this meditation to show an example of being in the mess and befriending my protective parts.
Learn the 5 steps so you can apply them to your next moment of suffering.
Remember, you're not alone.
Links:
Atypical Kids, Mindful Parents Blog
Compassion Club Private Podcast
How to Find Peace in the Mess of Parenting Neurodivergent Kids
Join us as my guest Kathryn Barbash, PsyD, a mom of four and a clinical psychologist, shares her experiences and strategies for parenting neurodivergent children. Kathryn discusses the importance of flexibility, the pitfalls of striving for perfection, and the concept of resilience.
Hear her personal stories, including the hilariously chaotic 'flour fiasco,' and gain insights on how to manage morning routines and emotional outbursts with kindness, creativity, and self-compassion.
This episode is a rich resource for parents seeking support, connection, and practical advice for their unique parenting experiences.
00:00 Morning Struggles and Parenting Challenges
00:43 Introduction to Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids
01:18 Meet Kathryn Barbash: Psychologist and Mom
03:33 The Flour Fiasco: Embracing Parenting Messes
08:00 The Second Arrow: Understanding and Managing Parental Guilt
16:46 Morning Routines: Tips and Strategies for Neurodivergent Kids
22:11 Collaborative Parenting: Working with Your Kids
26:21 Core Values and Joyful Parenting Moments
29:11 Conclusion and Where to Learn More
Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids podcast helps parents feel less alone. Kate interviews parents and experts who share her mission to co-create a more inclusive future.
Our podcast is a baby, and it needs your love to grow.
If you appreciate the strategies, connection, and support here, please help it reach other parents by leaving us a review.
Read the transcript, listen to the podcast, watch the video, and subscribe to the blog for more connection and support at Atypical Kids, Mindful Parents Blog: https://katelynch.substack.com/
Connect with Kathryn - Links:
https://open.substack.com/pub/mindfulinthemud/p/flour-fiasco-i-am-not-a-calm-mom
https://mindfulinthemud.substack.com
https://www.instagram.com/mindfulmominthemud/
As we approach Father's Day, I had the privilege of recording a special podcast episode with my husband, John Andrejack. This is a message of hope!
John is not just the father of our amazing atypical child, Ocean, but also an educator and a Parkinson's Disease advocate. This episode delves into parenting, coping with chronic illness, and the beauty of seeing our children thrive despite obstacles.
00:29 Meet John Andrejack: Educator and Parkinson's Advocate
01:15 John's Journey with Young Onset Parkinson's Disease
02:23 Parenting Challenges and Philosophies
05:10 Memorable Parenting Moments
06:13 A Walk on Water: Surf Therapy for Ocean
10:35 Parenting Mistakes and Lessons Learned
13:52 Core Values and Reflections on Fatherhood
18:08 Final Thoughts and Father's Day Wishes
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/oceansmama/message
How We Can Help Our Kids and Ourselves Feel Safer Today
What have you heard about Polyvagal Theory?
I love sharing about how it informs my parenting. We're parents of neurodivergent kids. Of course we need nervous system regulation skills.
I’m so glad Matthew Sloane from Fatherhood Dojo invited me to talk with him about one of my favorite topics!
In this conversation, Matt and I get personal, sharing stories of our own struggles with managing our fight, flight, freeze, and fawn responses. I offer tips to honor those survival instincts, including simple practices you can do in less than a minute.
You’ll gain practical techniques and transformative insights. Together, without judgment, we’ll climb the ladder of managing fear, starting with small steps.
Understanding why we're feeling overwhelmed or burnt out is helpful, but it’s not enough.
I’ll offer you hands-on strategies to find your calm before engaging with your kids…
…IF calm is what’s called for in the moment.
We examine the internalized judgment that can infiltrate our parenting, and the importance of self-awareness and self-compassion.
Listen to the podcast, watch the video, or read the transcript at https://katelynch.substack.com/p/helping-our-kids-feel-safer-polyvagal-theory and leave a comment on the blog.
But it's not all about the challenges - we also celebrate the moments of connection and beautiful memories that come with the territory of parenting. We underscore how Polyvagal Theory can help us differentiate emergencies from opportunities for growth for both us and our neurodivergent (or neurotypical) children.
It’s a reminder to all parents that, in the space between stimulus and response, there's room for growth and connection.
Thanks to Matt Sloane of fatherhooddojo.com for sharing the interview so that I could make it available to you here.
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/oceansmama/message
How to find strength and acceptance in inclusive parenting with Sonali Vongchusiri.
A mindful exploration of belonging versus fitting in, and combating internalized ableism.
Sonali is a highly-sensitive mom with three deeply-feeling and strong-willed kids. She also happens to be legally blind and have albinism. With her heartwarming stories and profound revelations, Sonali teaches us that you don't have to fit in to truly belong.
In this episode, we'll discuss the beauty of embracing one's true self, and the power of labels in accessing support and understanding. Sonali shares her journey of accepting her visual impairment, and transforming her internal struggle with albinism into strength.
The compassionate way she and her children embrace their differences fosters a family dynamic rich in confidence, humor, and sensitivity to individual needs.
By the end of the episode, you'll be able to answer these 3 questions:
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How has Sonali's journey of embracing her albinism and visual impairment influenced the way she parents and advocates for her neurodivergent children?
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How can parents balance the need to tell their children about their disability without inducing feelings of being an outsider or internalized ableism?
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What are some strategies to create an environment of belonging for atypical kids, both within the family and in wider social settings?
With her heartwarming stories and profound revelations, Sonali teaches us that you don't have to fit in to truly belong.
Read the full transcript, listen to the podcast, watch the video, and subscribe to the blog for more connection and support at Atypical Kids, Mindful Parents Blog: https://katelynch.substack.com/
Connect with Sonali and Forward Together Parenting:
Forward Together Parenting
Raising Your Strong Willed Child Facebook Group
Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids podcast helps parents feel less alone. Kate interviews parents and experts who share her mission to co-create a more inclusive future.
Our podcast is a baby, and it needs your love to grow! If you appreciate the strategies, connection, and support here, help it reach other parents! Please give it a ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ review.
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/oceansmama/message
"My mission is to expand access to aquatics for neurodivergent individuals."
-Nina Sporn
Nina Sporn teaches swimming and tennis to children and young adults, particularly neurodivergent individuals and children with emotional sensitivities that make athletics challenging.
She wants to make sure that people stay safe by learning basic swimming skills, and to consider swimming as a great way to be physically fit. Nina encourages kids to develop confidence through swimming and athletics. "All children are great at something...building a child's self-esteem and self-worth is crucial."
"I have had students who overcame incredible fear of the water and significant sensory issues, who have found the courage to ultimately 'let go' and swim freely. It brings me joy every time!"
-Nina Sporn
Some of the benefits of swimming:
Self esteem
Safety
Strength
Stamina
Gross motor mastery
Overcome fears
Sensory soothing
Outlet for anxiety
Great exercise
Fun with friends
Contact with other children
Nina sees the opportunities for physical activity for atypical kids as woefully inadequate. "Neurodivergent kids can gain confidence and fitness through sports, and swimming is about the best skill one can have (safety, strength, stamina, contact with other children, and can be an outlet for anxiety). Since Covid, program capacity has dwindled. My mission is to expand access to aquatics for neurodivergent individuals."
Running interference: How to help your kid get to the end zone in their own way, so they feel successful, empowered and accomplished.
5 Water Safety Basics:
Floating
Breath control
Blow bubbles
Get to safety
Push off the bottom
My riptide story: Why we position ourselves near lifeguards. A little fear of the ocean is a good thing. Drowning is a very quiet thing.
We lose skills when we can’t practice regularly.
Nothing takes the place of a parent’s attention. No one watches your child like you.
Spend time with your kids in the water. Make it fun.
Belly Button Blowhole Breathing Therapeutic benefits of silliness, especially after a micro trauma.
Nina's last word: "Have fun and wear sunscreen!"
Connect with Nina: nsporn@nyc.rr.com
Your comments, ratings and reviews mean a lot to me, and help other parents find our community.
Connect with Kate Lynch:
Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids Website: https://www.healthyhappyyoga.com/mindfully-parenting-atypical-kids
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCz4pioYjeRIsY_7Gs8ZXKGg
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/healthyhappyyoga/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/oceansmama/message
Parents, do you really need another condescending person telling you that you should be practicing self-care?
I mean, it’s just another thing on the list when we’re already so tired and stressed and frustrated. Right?
That’s why I prefer the term self-respect, or self-honoring. Those don’t take extra time or require us to do anything at all. It’s a mindset. A mindset we can model for our kids.
Let’s dispel a few myths:
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Self-care is self-improvement. Self-care doesn’t need to be earned, and it isn’t about changing you. Authentic self-care supports your inherent goodness.
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Self-care is self-indulgence. There’s nothing wrong with numbing out, but if you feel regretful afterwards, that’s not self-care. When we avoid our stress, it will still be there to deal with later.
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Self-care is specific things on a list written by someone other than you. You get to define what self care is for you.
Authentic self-care nourishes, energizes and grounds you by working on the root issue: the unnecessary backlog of tension in your body.
I don’t want to go around holding on to all of the stress that has built up over the years of advocating for my neurodivergent kid, navigating a world that dehumanizes them, and being expected to figure it out on my own as an unpaid second or third job.
Of COURSE we don’t have time for spa days!
The thing is, our kids are learning emotional regulation by watching us. Self-regulation can’t be taught, it has to be modeled.
Authentic self-care doesn’t use up your time or energy, it frees up your energy by giving you more awareness of what is and isn’t serving you. If a self regulation practice isn’t useful in 30 seconds, stop doing it. Try something else.
When we are more regulated, we will not only be there for our kids, we will be present for ourselves.
We’re breaking cycles to co-create a more inclusive future. Thank you for going on this journey with me.
Your comments, ratings and reviews mean a lot to me, and help other parents find our community.
Connect with Kate Lynch:
Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids Website: https://www.healthyhappyyoga.com/mindfully-parenting-atypical-kids
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCz4pioYjeRIsY_7Gs8ZXKGg
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/healthyhappyyoga/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/oceansmama/message
In which Ocean makes a surprise appearance to eat chips and talk about his expectations for summer.
In which I recap and reinforce the tips and practices we've covered to help you sail through summer with your neurodiverse family.
In which I throw a curveball, by telling a story about plans gone awry.
How My Family Is Prepping for a Summer Filled With Fun and Relaxation:
Call a casual family meeting. Grab some paper. Get curious.
-
Ask everyone, "How do we want to FEEL this summer?" Write everything down.
-
Ask everyone, "How are we going to make these feelings happen?" Write everything down.
-
Make everyone's dreams come true. There are creative ways to do this!
-
Make it visible by posting a summer calendar.
Here's the blog post which goes into more detail:
https://www.healthyhappyyoga.com/blog/plan-your-familys-summer-for-maximum-cooperation-fun
This helps us relax during summer, because we have more clarity on what we can expect.
There are times those plans will have to change, but preparation actually helps us ride those unexpected waves too.
Brené Brown's new book Atlas of the Heart mentions "stealth expectations" which is when you have wants and needs but you don't communicate them with anyone. That's what we want to avoid with this process.
Although Ocean was clear that he doesn't want sponsorship from A Walk On Water, I like to share our favorite resources for families of disabled kids. Here's their website: https://awalkonwater.org/
Connect with Kate Lynch:
Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids Website: https://www.healthyhappyyoga.com/mindfully-parenting-atypical-kids
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCz4pioYjeRIsY_7Gs8ZXKGg
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/healthyhappyyoga/
Summer Prep For Maximum Chill!
A workshop for parents of intense atypical kids who are ready to learn how to guide their family towards a fun and relaxing summer plan. Rescheduled: With Kate Lynch, June 15.
Sign up now: https://www.healthyhappyyoga.com/summer
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/oceansmama/message
Some Kids Come With Operating Instructions
Michelle Neuringer, a fellow parent, wrote to me recently:
"I’d like to get your thoughts on some struggles I’m having finding inclusive enrichment programs for my daughter (eg afterschool, camp). I think there’s a big opportunity to educate these enrichment providers on how to work with neurodivergent kiddos."
Michelle wants to introduce her autistic 7 year old to a range of experiences aligned with her special interests. Here in NYC, there's so much available, but in her experience the providers don't know how to work with our kids. Why do they freak out when we mention a diagnosis? How can we help them be more inclusive? What can we do as parents to support and educate enrichment providers on our kids?
So, we talked and came up with some ideas as a starting point:
- Start with things that light your kid up - their special interests.
- Communicate with the directors, but also the counselors who will actually be caring for your kid day to day. Share your expertise on your kid, beginning with their strengths and interests.
- Preview, plan and prime with your child before the program begins.
Here are some metrics Michelle envisions enrichment programs being adapted to be more inclusive:
- Kind of activity.
- Size of group.
- Parent involvement.
- Space, sensory environment, breaks.
- Meaningful inclusion: Kids co-create the curriculum, have a voice.
Michelle says, "I want listeners to join me in changing the world for our kids, so they can grow up in a world where they can take up space, be themselves and not be beholden to neurotypical goals and milestones."
Michelle Neuringer is mom to two amazing kids that have different ways of being in the world. She has also spent over 20 years designing & building technology products that help small businesses do what they love. She learned early in her career that to craft solutions that work, you must first discover and deeply understand who you’re serving, their needs, aspirations and motivations. Michelle has translated this mindset to her autistic daughter’s educational and therapeutic journey, learning and discovering alongside teachers and therapists.
https://www.michelleneuringer.com/neurodiversity
LinkedIn:
https://www.linkedin.com/in/michelleneuringer/
Parent Like You video:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TVCGvHT46aU
2 sides of the spectrum podcast:
https://open.spotify.com/episode/65LkxLStaU6VHQDH5cg4Z9?si=326a306b57a34c01
Summer Prep For Maximum Chill!
A workshop for parents of intense atypical kids who are ready to learn how to guide their family towards a fun and relaxing summer plan. With Kate Lynch RYT & Amy Weber LCSW, June 1 or 2. Sign up now: https://www.healthyhappyyoga.com/summer
Connect with Kate Lynch:
https://www.healthyhappyyoga.com/mindfully-parenting-atypical-kids
https://www.instagram.com/healthyhappyyoga/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/oceansmama/message
Are you feeling overwhelmed, parenting your neurodivergent kids during these stressful times? Yeah, me too. Welcome to Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids Podcast! For Season 2, we're talking about Summer Prep For Maximum Chill! Listen (or watch video podcasts) for support and strategies to co-create a fun, relaxed summer with your unique family.
Season 2 Episode 3 of the Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids Podcast is all about planning for day camp success with your neurodivergent kid!
I'm joined by Amy Weber, LCSW, to talk about practical steps you can take to sail through summer with less stress. Amy has been running a day camp for intense kids for 9 years through her interdisciplinary pediatric therapy practice in Brooklyn, New York: Speak, Learn, & Play. Amy sees children for individual and group therapy sessions, and helps parents through parent coaching. She is the author of the new book for kids, Gratitude is your Super Power!
Amy runs a camp for neurodivergent children every summer, so she has a unique perspective on the summer challenges of neurodiverse families. Amy also sees children for individual and group therapy sessions, and helps parents through Peaceful Parent Coaching.
https://speaklearnandplay.com/
https://peacefulparentcoaching.com/
Here are a few tips we covered:
-
Know your kid. Do they have trouble with transitions?
-
Talk with camp directors.
-
Create a cheat-sheet on your kid. Share your expertise with counselors. Partial disclosure for advocacy. Here's a video of Dr. Stephen Shore explaining his 3-step process: https://youtu.be/TVSiJtLpMeo?t=327
-Recognize a challenge
-Disclose the specific need
-Ask for an accommodation
Summer Prep For Maximum Chill!
A workshop for parents of intense atypical kids who are ready to
learn how to guide their family towards a fun and relaxing summer plan.
With Kate Lynch RYT & Amy Weber LCSW, June 1 or 2.
Sign up now: https://www.healthyhappyyoga.com/summer
Connect with Kate Lynch:
Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids Website: https://www.healthyhappyyoga.com/mindfully-parenting-atypical-kids
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/healthyhappyyoga/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/oceansmama/message
How Your Neurodivergent Family Can Prep for a Summer Filled With Fun and Relaxation
Episode 2: Summer Prep For Maximum Chill! With Amy Weber, LCSW
Listen (or watch video podcasts) for support and strategies to co-create a fun, relaxed summer with your unique family.
How My Family Is Prepping for a Summer Filled With Fun and Relaxation:
Call a family meeting. Grab some paper. Get curious.
-
Ask everyone, "How do we want to FEEL this summer?" Write everything down.
-
Ask everyone, "How are we going to make these feelings happen?" Write everything down.
-
Make everyone's dreams come true. There are creative ways to do this!
-
Make it visible by posting a summer calendar.
I mentioned the book Burnout: https://www.burnoutbook.net/
Amy Weber is the co-founder of Speak, Learn, & Play, an interdisciplinary pediatric therapy practice in Brooklyn, New York. She’s a clinical social worker, specializing in work with children and their families. Amy sees children for individual and group therapy sessions, and helps parents through Peaceful Parent Coaching.
https://speaklearnandplay.com/
https://peacefulparentcoaching.com/
Connect with Kate Lynch:
Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids Website: https://www.healthyhappyyoga.com/mindfully-parenting-atypical-kids
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCz4pioYjeRIsY_7Gs8ZXKGg
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/healthyhappyyoga/
Summer Prep For Maximum Chill!
A workshop for parents of intense atypical kids who are ready to
learn how to guide their family towards a fun and relaxing summer plan.
With Kate Lynch RYT & Amy Weber LCSW, June 1 or 2.
Sign up now: https://www.healthyhappyyoga.com/summer
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/oceansmama/message
Welcome to Season 2 of Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids! We're Back Just in Time to Prep for Summer!
Are you feeling overwhelmed, parenting your neurodivergent kids during these stressful times? Yeah, me too. Welcome to Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids, a neurodiversity-affirming parenting podcast where you'll find connection, strategies, and support for your journey.
I can’t wait to walk this path alongside you.
For Season 2, we're talking about Summer Prep For Maximum Chill! Listen (or watch video podcasts) for support and strategies to co-create a fun, relaxed summer with your unique family. This is an intro to Season 2, with a bit about me and a teaser of what I'll be sharing with you this season. Connect with Kate Lynch:
Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids Website: https://www.healthyhappyyoga.com/mindfully-parenting-atypical-kids
YouTube:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCz4pioYjeRIsY_7Gs8ZXKGg
Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/healthyhappyyoga/
Summer Prep For Maximum Chill! **A workshop for parents of intense atypical kids who are ready to
learn how to guide their family towards a fun and relaxing summer plan.
With Kate Lynch RYT & Amy Weber LCSW, June 1 or 2. Sign up now: https://www.healthyhappyyoga.com/summer**
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/oceansmama/message
How do you collect and ground yourself during a tense parenting moment? How will you survive the storm of your child's big emotions?
Try a visualization, meditation or breath pattern and practice until it becomes part of you.
Nichi's pug Millie gives her comfort when life is a challenge. Millie sat in on our chat on the Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids Podcast.
I know you will relate to Nichi when she asks, "How do I extract myself from my kids so I can ground myself? I need something quick that helps in the moment."
My answer isn't earth shattering...
Try a resource anchor, or emotional balance tool.
Your anchor can be any visualization, meditation or breath pattern that you practice a lot until it becomes part of you. Then, you can reach for it to anchor you when the seas get stormy.
Practice when you're alone, then in a calm time with your kids, then during the aftermath of a storm, and then finally during. It is not instantaneous. Give yourself permission to take time with this.
You are the one you can most readily affect, so keep the focus on yourself.
We also discussed systemic issues that parents are often made to believe we are responsible for. It can feel really lonely. You are not alone.
I’m so happy Nichi agreed to share our chat with you. Her four-year-old made an adorable appearance at the end.
Cherished Memory Meditation:
Recall a time you felt held and seen by someone you trust. A time you felt supported, beloved and cherished in your wholeness for exactly who you are. Reach back as far into your past as you need to. Settle your body back into this memory. Recall the sensory impressions associated with that memory. Plant yourself or bathe yourself in the memory. Drink it in. Imagine filling up with the memory. Keep the same memory and practice it often to activate neural pathways.
Remember, you are not alone.
I’m not trying to fix anyone’s parenting challenges, I have enough of my own. It can really help to know we’re not alone. Others are dealing with the same issues and trying to be better parents any way they can. Find a way to connect with other parents.
HERE is your invitation to the Summer Self-Care Club: https://withribbon.com/m/7226
Our podcast is young, and it needs your love to grow up strong and well adjusted! ;)
If you benefit from the strategies, connection and support this podcast offers, and you want to ensure it reaches other parents walking alongside you on this path, please go to Apple Podcasts and give it a review.
I would LOVE to hear from more parents. Leave a voice message to inspire a future episode!
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/oceansmama/message
This is a simple practice for when you're feeling a bit down on yourself.
Practice it when you feel okay, so it is readily available to you in moments of suffering.
It is a breathing practice connected with affirmations. It is adapted from walking meditations by Thich Nhat Hanh.
Think to yourself:
"I am home" as you breathe in.
"I have arrived" as you breathe out.
"I am worthy" as you breathe in.
"I belong here" as you breathe out.
Finish with the Bodhisattva vow: "May whatever arises in my life awaken compassion."
Kate Lynch is a meditation coach and inclusive yoga teacher. She specializes in using meditation, breath patterns, mindfulness, relaxation and gentle yoga to build resilience to anxiety.
This is NOT medical advice!
5 Days to Calmer Kinder Parenting: Connection, Strategies and Support for Parents of Intense Kids
Sign up now: https://healthy-happy-yoga.ck.page/calmer
Our podcast is young, and it needs your love to grow up strong and well adjusted!
If you benefit from the strategies, connection and support this podcast offers, and you want to ensure it reaches other parents walking alongside you on this path, please go to Apple Podcasts and give it a review.
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/oceansmama/message
Talking Law Enforcement With Our Atypical Kids
Edna is former NYPD and a superhero mama of kids with disabilities. I first met her when Ocean started kindergarten and I was so worried. She was one of the moms of older kids. She tucked me under her wing and shared warmth, reassurance, advice and empathy. You're going to LOVE her as much as I do. When I asked her to do this interview, she wholeheartedly accepted, saying "We need to be the example and the change."
Edna talks about her experiences and shares practical advice on how to talk to your atypical kid about these issues. This is an essential conversation to have with your child if there is any chance they will be unable to be compliant under pressure, or they may be misunderstood or appear scary to law enforcement. Even if none of that is true, talk with them. You don't know every scenario they will find themselves in. No matter their race, we all need to talk about it.
Yes, we need a new system. Until then, let's do what we can to keep all our kids safe. Here are a few basic tips from Edna, to start the conversation:
Atypical kids & law enforcement:
"You are not scary, but you might look scary to them because they don't know you. Don't worry about being in trouble. They are confused and we will sort it out when I get there. You may feel angry that they are treating you unfairly, but don't act angry because that may give them a reason to hurt you. I know you have done nothing wrong, and even if you have we will sort it out."
Dos and Don'ts to keep yourself safe:
Do keep your hands visible. Don’t reach for anything at all.
DO LISTEN and DO what they ask. DON’T RUN.
Do be polite. Don’t act angry or afraid, even if you are.
Do ask them to call your mom, if you can do it respectfully.
Don’t worry about being in trouble.
Focus on getting home safe.
Law enforcement & a group:
All of the above, plus… if your friend is being targeted:
Do stay and watch. Don’t leave.
Do call your friend’s parents if you can do so safely.
Do record everything for your friend’s safety if you can.
Keep breathing!!!
Our podcast is young, and it needs your love to grow up strong and well adjusted!
If you benefit from the strategies, connection and support this podcast offers, and you want to ensure it reaches other parents walking alongside you on this path, please go to Apple Podcasts and give it a review.
Leave me a voicemail if you would like to be on a future episode:
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/oceansmama/message
A Step-by-Step Guide To Help Parents Develop Self-Compassion
Why you should turn towards your crappy feelings when all you want to do is numb out.
5 Self-Compassion Questions for Parents:
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“Who in my life allows me to feel held?”
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“What am I struggling with that no one would know by looking at me?”
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“What am I trying not to feel?”
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“Where do I feel it in my body?”
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“What would I say to my close friend if they were feeling this way?”
Finally, simply pause. Pause and receive the words and the internal sense of comfort. Stay present in the moment without doing anything. Trust that all will be well if you stop doing all the parenting things long enough to soak up some self-compassion.
Video: https://youtu.be/5bjElEWBrhk
Article: https://betterhumans.pub/a-step-by-step-guide-to-help-parents-develop-self-compassion-e3e1c00d1a9c?sk=bdd225fb4922f6c165ca4aeac74b9779
Our podcast is young, and it needs your love to grow up strong and well adjusted!
If you benefit from the strategies, connection and support this podcast offers, and you want to ensure it reaches other parents walking alongside you on this path, please go to Apple Podcasts and give it a review.
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/oceansmama/message
Do you feel overwhelmed because you don't know everything about helping your kid? Here's how I deal with that anxiety.
There's So Much I Don't Know About My Atypical Kid
...and that's okay!
What Yoga Says About What We Don't Know
FB group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/mindfullyparentingatypicalkids
Free 5 Day Challenge starts Monday April 19! Sign up here: https://healthy-happy-yoga.ck.page/calmer
I'm excited to share a new feature on the podcast, to encourage connection and community:
Voice messages! Leave me a voice message through the link and I'll answer the ones I can on a future podcast.
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/oceansmama/message
This is now also an article in Better Humans Publication - How to Teach Atypical Family Yoga
https://betterhumans.pub/how-to-teach-atypical-family-yoga-32bba77ed462?sk=d93d20ac300da1c5cd3efbbaba593fab
Unconditional positive regard is the key to seeing kids shine! Non-judgment, self-regulation, and appreciation: these are essential in any yoga class. When teaching neurodiverse families (as I’ve done for 20 years), these qualities will make or break your class.
Jess is a yoga teacher who was hired to teach family yoga to a group with autistic kids. She was feeling nervous about it, and reached out for best practices and suggestions. Below are the recommendations I gave her.
These suggestions could also apply to doing yoga with your own family at home, or to any family yoga class. Modeling inclusivity benefits everyone.
What neurodivergent kids and their parents crave the most: Unconditional positive regard. Some other tips I cover: * “YES” space * Let it go * Accept * Appreciate * Priming * Visual supports * Special interests * Sensory Sensitivities * Community
How I Structure Inclusive Family Yoga Classes: Sit in a circle — kids with parents on one mat or each on their own next to each other. Encourage everyone to participate at their level of ability, and do something centering, like a name song, a chant or an ice breaker.
Let the kids shine! Keep it fun and be sweet. Keep relaxation time short. End with a simple song or chant.
Have a blast! Maybe you will see that the kids or their parents are calmer after class. Maybe you will see them shine. You may never know the benefit your class has on the families who attend. That’s okay, since inclusive family yoga isn’t something you will do for the validation. It will be an extension of your yoga practice, and you will learn so much.
FB group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/mindfullyparentingatypicalkids
Free 5 Day Challenge starts Monday April 19! Sign up here: https://healthy-happy-yoga.ck.page/calmer
I'm excited to share a new feature on the podcast, to encourage connection and community:
Voice messages! Leave me a voice message through the link and I'll answer the ones I can on a future podcast.
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/oceansmama/message
What is one thing you did this week that you’re proud of?
Meghan, a joyful, creative mom of differently wired twins, joins me in a passionate conversation about:
-Why committing to SOMETHING every day helps. It trains us to make the time for ourselves every day.
"It's easy to tell ourselves that other things are more important than us... You need this, even if it's 2 minutes. Once we have our differently wired kids, even if we did provide ourselves with more care before kids... I forgot how to do it. I forgot what it was. We do have to reprogram ourselves. Sometimes some of that is deprogramming." -Meghan
Our kids deserve to have us at our best. If you've been putting yourself last, I feel you. I’ve been there. Start fresh today by asking yourself this question:
What do I need in order to show up as my best self?
“Moving my body somehow. I’ve trained myself to make sure that happens because it helps to me be a more present and grounded person.”-Meghan
-Siblings: when to intervene, celebration, modeling, narrating, repair, boundaries. (Watch the unedited video in the FB group to see the cat fight!)
-With our kids, modeling and narrating go hand in hand.
“Before we ‘go over the cliff’, how can we pause? It is hard as adults and it is certainly challenging to teach your child that… I’m trying to model it and I’m trying to talk about that… When I get mad I say “I’m sorry I yelled. I need to remember to pause and take a breath.” Even if I didn’t do it right, I try and talk that out to them.” -Meghan
-We had expectations of our kids being like us, because it is all we knew up until that time. We had to go through the stages of grief, which isn’t a judgement on our kids. The 5 classic stages of grief, which aren't linear: Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance.
Links:
My Boundaries Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mindfully-parenting-atypical-kids-podcast/id1530252372?i=1000495895524
Amber DeLa Garza Boundaries podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/productivity-straight-talk-time-management-productivity/id1239598006?i=1000498816079
FB group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/mindfullyparentingatypicalkids
Free 5 Day Challenge now starts every Monday! Sign up here: https://healthy-happy-yoga.ck.page/calmer
I'm excited to share a new feature on the podcast, to encourage connection and community: Voice messages! Leave me a voice message through the link and I'll answer the ones I can on a podcast (or in an article or video). If you don't want me to put your voice on the podcast, email or DM me instead. If you want to be anonymous, don't leave your name on the message, or ask me to cut that part out.
Just know that I stay in my lane, so I won't answer medical questions, and I won't entertain talk of extreme interventions on children.
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/oceansmama/message
We're all fried after this year. Isolation and burnout are real.
Having a conversations with another parent who understands is one way you can prevent, or heal from, isolation and burnout.
This is a very special episode because Ocean's best friend's mom, my sister from another mother, my partner in crime Andrea joins us today. We've seen each other through all the ups and downs of these past 10 years. I really don't know what I would have done without her. We talk about the very early days, the trouble with letting our kids be kids, and learning as we grow together. We talk about letting it all slide as this pandemic nears 11 months of kicking our bottoms. It gives me great comfort that when we are gone, our boys will have each other. Please enjoy this peek into an epic parent friendship.
I'm excited to share a new feature on the podcast, to encourage connection and community:
Voice messages! Leave me a voice message through the link (scroll all the way down) and I'll answer the ones I can on a podcast (or in an article or video). If you don't want me to put your voice on the podcast, email or DM me instead. If you want to be anonymous, don't leave your name on the message, or ask me to cut that part out. Scroll down for the voicemail link.
Just know that I stay in my lane, so I won't answer medical questions, and I won't entertain talk of extreme interventions on children.
Let's stick together. We really need each other right now, parents!
I have found that having a small community of parents who understand is essential to my wellbeing. Join our Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids Community https://www.facebook.com/groups/3229904633801703/?source_id=400903940032482
To be the first to know about everything we're up to, join Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids, and grab your Mindful Meltdown Cheatsheet here: https://healthy-happy-yoga.ck.page/meltdown
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/oceansmama/message
Some parents have been curious about the book I'm writing. The idea of the book is to balance my stories about parenting an atypical kid with the practices which help me get through the day. Here's a little of each from the time before we had Ocean - how we slowly built resilience and our fertility journey.
The practice is simple, accessible and profound: Beginner's Mind. There will always be so much in life we can't control. This is a practice for that.
I'm excited to share a new feature on the podcast, to encourage connection and community: Voice messages! Leave me a voice message through the link and I'll answer the ones I can on a podcast (or in an article or video). If you don't want me to put your voice on the podcast, email or DM me instead. If you want to be anonymous, don't leave your name on the message, or ask me to cut that part out.
Just know that I stay in my lane, so I won't answer medical questions, and I won't entertain talk of extreme interventions on children.
Let's stick together. We really need each other right now, parents!
I have found that having a small community of parents who understand is essential to my wellbeing. Join our Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids Community https://www.facebook.com/groups/3229904633801703/?source_id=400903940032482
To be the first to know about everything we're up to, join Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids, and grab your Mindful Meltdown Cheatsheet here: https://healthy-happy-yoga.ck.page/meltdown
Send me a voicemail!
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/oceansmama/message
You're Invited! 5 Days to Calmer Kinder Parenting - Connection, strategies, and support for overwhelmed parents of atypical kids
Are you overwhelmed, parenting your intense kid during a pandemic?
Could you use some strategies, support and understanding?
Is there never time for self-care? Is stress getting the better of you?
Can you commit to 5 minutes a day for 5 days?
It doesn’t have to take long to build resilience.
This podcast is the introduction to a free challenge for stressed out parents of intense kids:
5 Days to Calmer Kinder Parenting - Connection, strategies, and support for overwhelmed parents of atypical kids.
It is on demand now, so sign up through the link and get ready to start the following Monday! Email me with questions any time.
Sign up now: https://healthy-happy-yoga.ck.page/calmer
I think you’ll open your email really looking forward to those 5 minutes every day!
An optional private facebook group and Instagram challenge will provide community, motivation and gentle accountability.
Send me a voicemail to be included in a future episode!
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/oceansmama/message
Answering Parent Questions: 5 Things To Remember When Your Kid is Being Judged
A parent I met (through the 5 day challenge) asked me some wonderful questions, and since I have been writing so much I decided to record my thoughts. I touch on early signs of differences in my son, a little about denial and diagnosis, what I do when people notice my kid's differences, and finally discuss creating inclusive culture for our kids.
Educate Through Challenges, Celebrate Strengths:
5 Things I Try to Remember When My Kid is Standing Out
-Some people will judge your parenting or your child, because they are ignorant. Don’t take it personally. Your kid is doing his best and other people’s judgment probably doesn’t bother him. If it does, that shows great emotional maturity and awareness. You and your child are separate people. This isn't a reflection on you.
-Wait. They get older. They won’t be like this forever. We don't know who they will become.
-Get out of the habit of isolation. Connect with other parents of atypical kids. Find someone to check in with. Push yourself to do this because it is really important.
-Know how brave you are feeling today. Prioritize your emotional safety and don't put yourself in vulnerable situations when you're feeling down.
-Look at your uncomfortable feelings and try to understand what is actually yours, and what is internalized from the culture or others.
Remember the 80/20 rule: Help your child with his challenges 20% of the time and celebrate his strengths 80% of the time.
I do like to ramble, so please help me focus in on what interests you most by getting in touch and asking your own questions.
I'm excited to share a new feature on the podcast, to encourage connection and community:
Voice messages! Leave me a voice message through the link (scroll all the way down) and I'll answer the ones I can on a podcast (or in an article or video). If you don't want me to put your voice on the podcast, email or DM me instead. If you want to be anonymous, don't leave your name on the message, or ask me to cut that part out.
Just know that I stay in my lane, so I won't answer medical questions, and I won't entertain talk of extreme interventions on children.
Let's stick together. We really need each other right now, parents!
I have found that having a small community of parents who understand is essential to my wellbeing. Join our Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids Community https://www.facebook.com/groups/3229904633801703/?source_id=400903940032482
To be the first to know about everything we're up to, join Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids, and grab your Mindful Meltdown Cheatsheet here: https://www.healthyhappyyoga.com/meltdown
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/oceansmama/message
Meet Meghan
Awesome, Creative, Magic Making Parent. We had a great talk about the FREE 5 Days to Calmer Kinder Parenting. I love this quote from Meghan:
"Community is really important. It's up to us to keep reaching out to each other for help and strength and understanding."
Listen and reach out with your questions through my website or in to FB group:
Join our Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids Community https://www.facebook.com/groups/3229904633801703/?source_id=400903940032482
5 Days to Calmer Kinder Parenting will start on Monday and each day I’ll share 5 minutes of strategies and support.
In 5 days you will feel calmer, kinder and less isolated while parenting your atypical kid.
Use the link in my bio to join the challenge! https://healthy-happy-yoga.ck.page/calmer
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/oceansmama/message
Parenting With Purpose: Your Atypical Kid's Amazing Future
Prepare Your Atypical Kid's Amazing Future
What is REALLY important in a meaningful life?
All of our kids can learn. We need to figure out how they learn best. Often, it is a matter of timing and maturity. We can meet them where they're at.
If you're short on time, look for the 25 minute version of this talk. This is the long version, with lots of examples from my life with Ocean.
“All parenting turns on a crucial question: to what extent parents should accept their children for who they are, and to what extent they should help them become their best selves.”
-Andrew Solomon, Far from the Tree: Parents, Children, and the Search for Identity
This podcast is my answer to that question.
We can set an example by caring for ourselves and others. By taking responsibility for our own happiness and our relationships. By being caring to ourselves first.
We have an incredible opportunity to become more conscious, patient and happy than we ever expected.
We have an opportunity to transform. As we do, we can have an impact on the future of our children. Envisioning that future, and taking steps towards it, can help us feel more hopeful and motivated on the parenting path.
I’m so excited to tell you that I’m hosting a free challenge, 5 Days to Calmer Kinder Parenting, and I would love for you to join! Connection, strategies, and support for overwhelmed parents of atypical kids. We start January 11. Sign up now, before your kid distracts you!
https://healthy-happy-yoga.ck.page/calmer
Join me for a live workshop - Parenting with Purpose: Pathways to a Joyful Future for Your Atypical Kid. https://healthyhappyyogascheduling.as.me/Future
A 2 Part Series Online via Zoom. Envisioning a joyful future, and then taking steps towards it, can help us feel more hopeful and motivated on the parenting path. Guided mindfulness meditation, visualization, journaling, homework to do with your family, and follow up support.
To be the first to know about the Compassion Challenge for Parents, join Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids, and grab your Mindful Meltdown Cheatsheet here:
https://www.healthyhappyyoga.com/meltdown
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/oceansmama/message
How To Stay Patient and Hold Boundaries When Your Atypical Kid is Home All. The. Time.
Okay. I don't have solid answers, but Ocean and I have plenty of thoughts. I'll share some strategies which can help: Simple family meetings, patience promoting practices, and Amber De La Garza's 3 step framework for boundaries: Identify the boundary, framing it as what you need in order to show up as your best self. Lovingly communicate the boundary. Hold the boundary. Repeat... Good luck!
Let's stick together. We really need each other right now, parents!
I have found that having a small community of parents who understand is essential to my wellbeing. Join our Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids Community https://www.facebook.com/groups/3229904633801703/?source_id=400903940032482
To be the first to know about the Compassion Challenge for Parents, join Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids, and grab your Mindful Meltdown Cheatsheet here:
https://www.healthyhappyyoga.com/meltdown
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/oceansmama/message
Yawning is universal and so simple. When we’re under threat, we don’t yawn. Yawning signals to your body that you are safe enough to relax.
You might set off a chain reaction, which is not a problem. Your nervous system deserves a good yawn.
Think of a cat, yawning with its entire body. Reach your arms up, lengthening one side as you breathe in through a wide mouth. Exaggerate the movement. Then, do the other side.
We are socialized to think there’s something impolite about yawning. Our culture tells us to suppress our yawns. Drop that belief for now. Here, yawning is encouraged.
You have just given your nervous system a tune up by activating your vagus nerve and stimulating the ‘attend and befriend’ response of your nervous system. Please note how you feel after the Yawn.
I have found that having a small community of parents who understand is essential to my wellbeing. Join our Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids Community https://www.facebook.com/groups/3229904633801703/?source_id=400903940032482
To be the first to know about the Compassion Challenge for Parents, join Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids, and grab your Mindful Meltdown Cheatsheet here:
https://www.healthyhappyyoga.com/meltdown
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/oceansmama/message
Progressive relaxation is a great way to learn how to release your muscles more deeply. Sometimes it helps to exaggerate your tight places, so that you can identify them and then let them go. This is a great practice to help you wind down for sleep, or whenever you need to ground yourself.
We end with the Serenity Prayer, in order to let go of hyper-vigilance on a deeper level.
Please send me an email and let me know how you would like to be supported on this podcast. Would you like to hear more from Ocean? How about other parents? More breathing or mindfulness or gentle yoga practices?
Join our Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids Community https://www.facebook.com/groups/3229904633801703/?source_id=400903940032482
To be the first to know about the Compassion Challenge for Parents, join Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids, and grab your Mindful Meltdown Cheatsheet here:
https://www.healthyhappyyoga.com/meltdown
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/oceansmama/message
How's your primary relationship? I'm talking about your relationship with yourself!
Do you ever say unkind words to yourself? Would you say those words to someone you love?
Parents, when you are hard on yourself, there are ripple effects. You may think your kids aren't listening, but those are the only times they ARE listening! They absorb more than we think. Our kids are learning self acceptance (or self criticism) by how we treat ourselves. If you wouldn't say something to your beloved, try not to say it to yourself.
Here are 3 Steps to Self Acceptance, based on mindfulness practices:
- Observe your unkind thought. Don't pile on by judging yourself further. Just notice the thought.
- Feel the associated feelings in your body. Say yes to whatever feeling is present here.
- Say something kind to yourself. For example, "It's not your fault." or "You're not alone in this." or "I love you."
I have found that having a small community of parents who understand is essential to my wellbeing. Join our Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids Community https://www.facebook.com/groups/3229904633801703/?source_id=400903940032482
To be the first to know about the Compassion Challenge for Parents, join Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids, and grab your Mindful Meltdown Cheatsheet here:
https://www.healthyhappyyoga.com/meltdown
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/oceansmama/message
Ocean and I were just swapping YouTube videos about bullying, and we decided to record a conversation. I'm a bit anxious about Ocean starting middle school next year. 'Bullies' are everywhere throughout life, so it is important to me that we keep an open dialogue.
Please note that we are NOT talking about any sort of physical abuse.
Brooks Gibbs has been on my radar for a while. In general his approach makes a lot of sense to me; way more sense than some of the traditional vilifying/shaming/victimizing strategies imposed top-down by school systems. Gibbs categorizes bullies as someone who either feels that they have been wronged, are power hungry, or they actually think they are being funny. He shares ways to defuse all three.
I agree with Gibbs about not reacting to the mean words, or being extra kind. However, I don't agree with "Don't get upset."
Be aware of who it is safe to SHOW you're upset with.
Mindfulness can help us defer our reactions. We can postpone them, but eventually our feelings need somewhere to go. I hope everyone, child and adult, has someone safe to talk with about any challenging feelings. Being tough isn't the special sauce here, it is staying calm even though you feel hurt. When you know who is safe to share your feelings with, it is easier to not react to teasing in the moment.
You can proactively role play with your kid, like we did. Then, you can remind your child that we all have hurt feelings. You can model naming your own hurt feelings, and describe how they feel in your body.
Your child can ask themselves, “What is happening now?” They might actually pause to notice what’s happening in their environment. Then, “Can I be with it, or is it too much?” If staying and talking to the bullying kid feels too painful, they need to be empowered to walk away.
These are complex skills for anyone. I was nudging Ocean towards his own conclusions.
Ocean and I laugh a lot in this podcast, but bullying is no laughing matter. Laughter is a coping mechanism, and humor has always been one of his superpowers. I was intentionally being silly about it, not to belittle the topic, but to discharge any residual stress from suppressed memories.
After the chat with Ocean, I share some simple mindfulness tips and scripts, and my guiding light: the serenity prayer.
Brooks Gibbs video: https://youtu.be/7oKjW1OIjuw
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/oceansmama/message
Advice for parents of atypical kids, from Ocean as he begins his 5th grade year in NYC's ASD Nest program, amid pandemic confusion. He offers simple, logical suggestions about parenting anyone, really, in a mindful, observant and collaborative way.
Ocean has some thoughts about when parents should tell their kid about their diagnosis.
He has strong feelings about the way his ABA Pre-K tried to deal with his aversion to snaps and buttons. He did look adorable at his Aunt's wedding, but he definitely was NOT wearing a tie. I'll post a pic in the Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids Facebook Group, on request! Join here: Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids, and grab your Mindful Meltdown Cheatsheet here:
https://www.healthyhappyyoga.com/meltdown
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/oceansmama/message
“All parenting turns on a crucial question: to what extent parents should accept their children for who they are, and to what extent they should help them become their best selves.”
-Andrew Solomon,
Far from the Tree: Parents, Children, and the Search for Identity
This podcast is my answer to that question. We can set an example, by caring for ourselves and others. By taking responsibility for our own happiness and our relationships. By being caring to ourselves first. We have an opportunity to transform. As we do, we can have an impact on the future of our children. Envisioning that future, and taking steps towards it, can help us feel more hopeful and motivated on the parenting path.
I have found that having a small community of parents who understand is essential to my wellbeing. Join our Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids Community https://www.facebook.com/groups/3229904633801703/?source_id=400903940032482
Mindful Meltdown Cheatsheet here: https://www.healthyhappyyoga.com/meltdown
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/oceansmama/message
As parents of atypical kids, we know, when it RAINS, it pours.
In the process of living a life of meaning, my vulnerability arises. Emotionally raw places become exposed, and my precarious serenity is challenged not only by my relationship with my son, but by life in general.
Join me in a self-compassion process which has helped me immensely to heal my underlying emotional wounds. Recognize, allow, investigate and nurture your uncomfortable feelings, and then saturate your nervous system with compassion. I first learned RAIN from Tara Brach. I have added the stage of Saturate, in place of After the RAIN.
I have found that having a small community of parents who understand is essential to my wellbeing. Join our Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids Communityhttps://www.facebook.com/groups/3229904633801703/?source_id=400903940032482
To be the first to know about the Compassion Challenge for Parents, join Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids, and grab your Mindful Meltdown Cheatsheet here:
https://www.healthyhappyyoga.com/meltdown
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/oceansmama/message
Welcome to Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids!
My son Ocean suggested we record a podcast to help other atypical kids who have been affected by the changes due to Coronavirus. He shares his strategies and what has been the hardest.
At the end, I'll lead you through a few simple eye exercises, in case you are also experiencing stress and eye strain.
Connect with other parents in the Facebook group: Mindfully Parenting Atypical Kids Community.
Download the Mindful Meltdown Cheat Sheet & join my newsletter: https://healthy-happy-yoga.ck.page/
Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/oceansmama/message